A/N: Buckle up. Hold on tight. Keep your arms and legs inside the ride at all times. Also, thanks for your patience. Doing my best keeping up. The United States is...um...well...let's just say that if the USA was any other country it would have invaded itself by now. Everyone stay safe. And enjoy some Emison love.
Chapter 38:
Labor of Love
Emily's mind was reeling when they pulled out of the driveway. She looked back at the house, knowing that the next time she saw it she would be walking through the front door with a baby in her arms.
She had enough presence of mind to text Isaac when they were on their way to the hospital.
In labor. PS: Don't panic. Women do this every day. I'll be fine.
He responded when they were halfway to the hospital.
You got this. I'm here if you need anything!
She sent a group text to the girls to let them know. They went crazy in the chat. Hanna had a lot to say. She sent a block of emojis to showcase her excitement, followed by,
OMG, YOU'RE GOING TO BE A MOM! A HOT MOM! TOTAL MILF.
It was laughter she so sorely needed.
The car ride was fairly quiet with the exception of Emily's light patterned breaths breaking through every so often. She'd quietly grunt and breathe through it. Alison could feel the pressure against her hand slowly starting to get tighter and tighter as the contractions got more intense.
The car was filled with music that Emily and Alison had put together. They'd had the idea for a playlist for a few weeks. They thought soft melodies might help.
Her dad asked her how she was doing nearly a dozen times. Emily could near the concern in his voice.
She was too focused to be worried. All her attention was on delivering her baby safely. She wasn't sure what to expect when she got to the hospital. She'd read it was different for everyone.
The black sedan trailed along behind them, staying far enough away to keep from arousing suspicion.
Emily's dad was a high ranking officer in the military. He would notice if they were being followed.
The black car took its time. It's not like their destination was a secret. It was pretty clear Emily was in labor.
The black car turned and pulled into a parking deck adjoining the hospital as Emily's dad pulled their car up to the curb.
Emily was mid-contraction when they wheeled her into the building. Her hands were firmly against her stomach. Alison had her hands on top of Emily's, breathing with her.
They parked the wheelchair next to a row of seats. Alison sat next to her. She stayed with her while her parents checked her in.
"That one was intense." Emily puckered her lips and let out a breath of air as the pain dissipated.
Alison opened her mouth to respond, but she wasn't sure what to say. Her mouth felt dry and cottony. The reality of the situation was starting to set in.
Emily was in labor. In a matter of hours she was going to have a baby. They had just graduated. They were only eighteen. They didn't even have a set plan for their future yet. And they were going to responsible for a whole new life.
She knew all of this, yet it was still somehow unreal to her. She was excited, but she was also scared.
All of the scary things about child-rearing were suddenly at the forefront of her mind.
What if she wasn't good enough? What if the baby hated her? How were they going to make New York work? Would she be able to handle school and an infant?
She peered at the brunette. All it took was one look at her to quiet the racing thoughts of fear. She knew that Emily was dealing with all of those thoughts and more and she was actively getting ready to push an entire little human out of her body.
"You know I love you, right?" Alison stroked Emily's arm, her voice shaky and nervous. Alison wasn't sure why she'd blurted it out.
Emily seemed equally as confused. She skimmed her face curiously. She could tell that something was bothering her.
"Are you okay?" Emily cocked her head.
"I'm fine." She nodded, but her mind felt empty.
She was panicking.
A woman in pink scrubs walked up to them, interrupting their conversation. She didn't look much older than them.
"Emily Fields?" She questioned, looking at an iPad in her hands. She had a hospital bracelet ready.
"Is it the giant belly that gave it away?" Emily asked with a stifled laugh.
The nurse smiled. Something about her seemed familiar. Emily studied her profile as the young woman put the hospital bracelet on her and scanned the barcode. She verified Emily's birthday and then wrote something in her chart.
The girl read the information in front of her, tense little lines of concentration on her face. Emily peered at the crease in her brow.
"Do we know each other?" Emily tried to find a hidden memory.
"Hmm?" The nurse looked up from the iPad in her hand.
"You look familiar. Do I know you?"
"I'm not sure. I've only been here a few months. And I don't really get out much. My son keeps me busy."
The way she lit up when she mentioned her son is what sparked the memory.
It was the girl from the Mexican restaurant. The night she'd told Alison about her pregnancy they'd gone to a little place to get some burritos. Alison had been rather rude to the girl. Emily had tipped her and she had gushed about her son.
"You used to work at Aztec Grill." The last time she'd seen her she had been working on getting her nursing degree. She remembered her Statistics book being off to the side on a stool. "You got your degree."
"I did. I was lucky to land this internship here." She perked up. "Went from delivering food to delivering babies. Speaking of…" She looked at Emily's stomach. "We're going to take you back and see how dilated you are."
Alison stood up next to her.
"It's going to take a few minutes to get everything set up. But we'll come get you as soon as we can." The nurse glanced at Alison.
"I can't go with her?" Alison's voice came out firm and shrill. Her throat felt like it was closing up.
"Of course." She was patient in her response. "You're allowed in the room. It just takes about five minutes to get everything situated. It can get a little busy in there when we first start, so we prefer to get all the monitors hooked up before bringing family back."
Alison scowled. She was not leaving Emily's side.
"Well, I prefer to stay with her…"
"Alison, it'll be fine." Emily cut her off. She was in no mood to fight small battles.
She'd always assumed her pregnancy would come with mood swings, but she didn't think they would be Alison's. Though, she knew her girl was an emotional person, so she wasn't completely caught off-guard.
Alison looked at Emily, staring at the floor with large sad eyes. She looked like a kicked puppy. Emily felt bad for snapping at her.
"You're right." Alison realized she was losing control. "I'm sorry." She looked at the young nurse. "Jitters."
"It's understandable. We'll take very good care of her." She promised. "I will be right back to get you."
Alison had a hard time letting go of Emily's hand. Emily gave her fingers a gentle squeeze to let her know that everything was going to be okay.
The young nurse wheeled her away. Emily looked over her shoulder. The blonde's eyes locked on hers. She arched on her heels like she was getting ready to sprint after her. But after a few seconds she sat down in the chair.
She folded her hands across her lap and sucked on her lip. She watched as the nurse took the brunette away.
She didn't know that as she was watching Emily, someone else was watching them.
The hospital was abuzz with activity. It was easy for people to slip in. People in scrubs were everywhere. Anyone could throw on a pair of scrubs and throw themselves into the mix. No one would notice someone hiding behind the guise of medical professionals.
As Emily was being led through a pair of double doors she saw her parents walking over to where Alison was sitting.
"She's really nervous." Emily looked up at the nurse.
"It's nice that she cares so much." She swung Emily's wheelchair towards an open room. She parked the chair next to a bed. "How far apart are the contractions?"
"They've been at eight minutes for almost an hour now. And they're getting stronger."
"Steady?"
"Yeah."
"You probably still have a little while to go, but we're going to make you as comfortable as possible." She reached into a drawer and pulled out a prepackaged hospital gown.
After Emily got changed the young woman helped her into the bed and offered her a blanket. Something about her presence was comforting. It might have been due to the fact that the girl was a young mother herself. Emily had seen a lot of people side-eying her and judging her because she was a teen mom. The young nurse didn't have that look.
An older woman in scrubs walked into the room and the two of them worked together to get Emily situated.
She had a contraction as they were hooking her up to the monitor and she actually got to see it play out on screen.
The last time she'd frantically watched the monitors was the night of the Halloween dance when she'd dreamed about Courtney. It sent her careening back to that moment.
The blood on her fingers. The sadistic look on the blonde's face. The contraction felt exactly like the pains she'd had that night.
"What did you do?" she'd cried in her dream. "Courtney, what did you do?"
She didn't even know she was holding her breath until the older nurse tapped her cheek.
"Emily, you need to breathe. You don't want to pass out."
She heaved out a breath and then started hyperventilating.
"I need my girlfriend." She saw spots in her eyes and thought she was going to faint, but after a few seconds her vision returned to normal. "Please."
"I'll check on that for you." The older woman nodded.
She walked out of the room. The younger girl double-checked the wires as Emily came down from the contraction.
The room was quiet. It made her feel uneasy. She looked at the walls, which had been covered with professional photographs and paintings, probably used as a focal point for women in labor. The paint was a light shade of peach, a color that was supposed to be soothing. But all of the machinery made the atmosphere a bit colder.
Her stomach was doing flips. She felt nauseous, but she wasn't sure if it was the labor or her nerves.
"How bad does it get?" Emily asked quietly.
"It's different for everyone." She tried to be comforting, but Emily saw her grimace. "It's worth it though."
"You light up when you talk about your son." Emily tried to focus on the positive. She knew another contraction was imminent. "I remember that about you from the restaurant."
"I love him more than anything. He's the reason I do what I do."
It made Emily feel better about her own future to see someone else who'd had a baby when they were young who still followed their dreams. It took a lot of hard work, but it was possible. It made her feel like she could do it, too.
There was a gentle knocking sound, a rapping against the entryway. She looked up and saw her doctor's smiling face. She walked in, followed by another nurse. The younger intern wished Emily good luck and then went to follow up to make sure that someone was getting Alison for her.
As she was walking out into the waiting area she bumped into someone claiming to be looking for the inpatient area.
She pointed towards the reference desk, but when she turned away she didn't see the person calmly walking in the opposite direction. She straightened the badge hanging around her neck, not knowing that in the near future there would be a duplicate used for dubious purposes.
o ~ O ~ o
Doctor Sullivan did a quick exam before Alison was brought into the room. She was finishing up as the eager blonde and Emily's parents came to join her.
The doctor explained that Emily was only dilated three centimeters and that she was still in the very early stages of her labor.
It discouraged Alison and Emily, because they thought that once the contractions were closer together it meant she was closer to giving birth. The doctor told them the dilation took time and that the contractions would become more frequent and intense, but sometimes the progression of the actual labor was slow.
Emily was not looking forward to the hours of increasingly intense contractions, but having the people she loved with her made her feel comfortable. Knowing that at the end of it she would have her child in her arms made it feel like it would be worthwhile.
As Doctor Sullivan predicted, the labor progressed slowly. It was painfully tedious. Alison found herself looking at the clock and growing impatient. The longer that Emily was in pain the more aggravated she was at the situation.
All the classes in the world couldn't have prepared them for the experience of childbirth. Emily hadn't had any idea how little control she'd have over her body. And Alison hadn't known just how hard it would be for her to see Emily writhing in pain.
Yet beyond their fears…their excitement was bubbling beneath the surface. The highs and lows were hard to waver. Every time Emily had a contraction Alison felt an invisible pressure closing in around her, too.
Emily handled the entire thing with an envious amount of strength and bravery, but she started to get winded after two hours of non-stop labor. She had reached a point where her energy was expended and her body was starting to give out.
The wild vibrant life in her eyes that Alison loved had been replaced with a dull glassy expression, almost as if she'd separated herself from her body.
Sometimes her tired brown eyes would look to Alison for reassurance. Alison did her best to give it to her, but she needed reassurance of her own.
Emily's parents were a Godsend. They knew exactly what to do. Then again, they'd already done it when they had Emily.
Three hours after Emily got to the hospital she passed out from exhaustion. She had several periods where she would close her eyes to try to catch three or four minutes of sleep before the next contraction started.
The longest stretch she slept was ten minutes. Her parents had slipped out to grab some coffee. Alison opted to stay with her. Even when Emily was resting her body was rocked with tremors.
Her jaw was rigid and tense, but her eyes were clenched shut. She was in a strange meditative state.
Alison reached out to touch Emily's stomach, staring at the wires covering it. It was amazing that technology was so advanced that a child inside her mother's womb could be monitored so closely.
She saw Emily's stomach tensing up. Her chest flummoxed. She glanced at the machine monitoring the contractions and noticed the beginning of a large spike.
Not knowing what else to do, she lowered her head and whispered to the baby, pleading with her to make it easier on her mom, as if she had any control over the situation.
"Ali?" Emily's strained voice drew her attention away from her baby bump.
She looked up at the brunette.
"Hey." She angled her body towards Emily's face. She kept her palm in place against her stomach, hoping that a slight touch might help.
"I can feel her." Emily smiled, the sides of her lips twitching as she tried to fight her fatigue. "When you…" She took a breath, preparing herself for the impending contraction. "When you talk to her. I swear you two have your own language already."
She blinked slowly. Her eyes felt like sandpaper. She'd strained so hard. Her jaw was trembling. She was doing her best to power through it.
Alison admired her more than she could say. Her sweet fearless Emily. She faced everything in her life with a bold sense of adventure and a beautiful unwavering nature.
She reached up and brushed Emily's hair behind her ear, leaving her hand against her sweaty cheek. She saw a calmness settle over Emily's face for a brief moment. The brunette let out a breath and let her body relax. Alison's touch gave her a very short reprieve.
Alison leaned over her and kissed her forehead, letting her lips linger. She wanted Emily to feel how much she loved her.
Emily closed her eyes and smiled warmly and softly murmured,
"I love you, too."
She opened her eyes again and let out a sigh. Her body tensed as the small wave on the machine monitoring her contractions started to spike. She hissed through her teeth when she felt it coming.
Alison put her palm against Emily's forehead.
"Breathe, baby."
Emily leaned forward and braced herself. Alison walked through it with her. Once it was over Emily collapsed back against the bed and let out a shaky breath. Alison reached for a basin next to the bed with lukewarm water. She grabbed a clean washcloth and dipped it into the water.
She dabbed the sweat away from Emily's brow.
The feel of the cloth against her face triggered the memory of prom night.
Courtney in her bathroom, gently cleaning her face off as she laid there, paralyzed. Her instincts kicked into overdrive. All she could think about was Courtney trying to hurt her baby. The delusion morphed into the reality of Alison standing in front of her. She blinked and Courtney was standing there, a strange look on her face.
"It must hurt. It must hurt so bad…to be this close…"
Her body jerked, her face flinching as her eyes widened. She reached out and latched on to Alison's wrist, a frantic spark of fear on her face.
But then she blinked again, and her eyes met Alison's shocked gaze. The blonde was dumbfounded by her reaction. She didn't understand the sudden change in her behavior. Emily was looking at her like she didn't recognize her.
"Are you okay?" Alison's heart sped up in her chest. Was something wrong? "Do you need something? Do I need to get your mom and dad? The doctor?"
After a few seconds Emily blinked, as if she was blinking herself back into reality.
"No." She sank back into the mattress when she realized it was Alison. "Sorry. I…" She didn't know how to explain it. Her brain was fried, so she just repeated, "Sorry."
The next two waves of contractions were even stronger than the previous ones.
She had to be getting close.
But when the doctor came in to check her, she had only dilated another centimeter. Her child was taking her sweet time.
Emily tried to find the bright side. Her kid wouldn't ever be in a hurry to let life pass her by. She'd want to stop and smell every rose in her path.
Alison was impatient. She wanted to meet the little girl. She wanted Emily's suffering to be over. She wanted instant gratification. She thought nature was stupid for making women go through hours of intense pain. She wanted to rewrite science to make childbirth pleasant and painless.
Emily's mom and dad were in and out of her room. Her dad was worried about crowding her. He also wanted her to have whatever privacy she wanted. It made Emily laugh to see him putter around like a clueless puppy. All she could think about was her mother telling her that he was afraid of her uterus.
Another thirty minutes passed.
Emily was well-aware of the time. She knew that Alison hadn't had anything to eat, so she asked her parents to go and get her something.
It was amazing to Alison that Emily was still trying to take care of her even though she was in active labor.
The length of her labor was starting to get to Alison. She was irritated that she couldn't help her. She was cranky because she hadn't slept. She was territorial over Emily and she was snippy with the nursing staff when they did anything that made Emily uncomfortable. She didn't have control of anything, and that was difficult for her.
She didn't have Emily to help guide her through what to do. And she felt clueless. She'd read every baby book, listened to every podcast, watched every educational video, gone to every class…and she still felt unprepared.
When Emily's contractions got closer together she retreated into herself even more. Alison saw a shell of her girlfriend as Emily tried to separate the pain of the labor and the thrill of meeting her baby.
They'd been doing their best to keep Isaac updated. Alison had been texting him what was going on.
He was shocked that she was still in labor. He hadn't realized that childbirth could take days.
Alison hated the fact that it could take days.
The older nurse that had come in with the doctor checked on her periodically. During one of her visits she tried to help Emily find a more comfortable position as her body processed the birth of her daughter.
She rolled to her side as the nurse rubbed gentle circles against her back.
"You're doing great." The nurse tried to encourage her.
But Emily didn't hear the praise. She was too far detached to respond. Everything hurt and she felt like she couldn't breathe.
Alison was next to her bedside, her chair pulled close. Their faces were inches apart. Alison's hands were folded around Emily's.
Emily concentrated on Alison's face, her furrowed brows heavy in concentration. She could see the little flecks of white and blue in her eyes. She honed in on the curve of her lips and the way the edges were turned down in a fretful frown. She looked at edges of her mouth where, when she was smiling, her dimples could make her melt.
She flipped her hand over and grasped Alison's palm tightly as her back spasmed. The sharpness of the pain gripped her entire body with a shocking amount of force that she was still trying to acclimate herself to.
"How are you doing?" Alison laid her arm against Emily's bed and let the brunette pull her hand close to her body. She could feel the tension in her embrace. Her hands were shaking.
"I'm cold." Her teeth were chattering. "I can't…I can't stop shaking."
She was covered in sweat, but she was freezing. She'd been told it was normal, but it felt like the most counterintuitive thing in the world. How was it possible to be on fire and be freezing at the same time?
"It hurts." She trembled.
The brunette's entire body convulsed when the pain swept over her. The veins in her neck bulged. Her entire face was tinged red. She was shaking so violently that it was starting to scare Alison.
"Can't you do something?" Alison looked up at the nurse and begged. "Help her."
"It's all a part of it, sweetie. It's just her body reacting." She reached up and checked an IV line that was running into Emily's arm.
"Are you sure you don't want an epidural?" Alison put her free hand against Emily's face.
They'd discussed it a few times, but Emily wasn't at the point where she wanted one yet, which was a shock to Alison, because she was certain that if she was in Emily's shoes she would have insisted on drugs the second they got through the door. But she knew everyone was different.
Emily shook her head, so Alison didn't question it further.
Time felt like it didn't exist in the hospital room. Alison didn't know if it was day or night anymore.
She thought she'd be calm. For months she'd told herself it wouldn't be scary…that it wasn't a big deal. She'd told herself she'd be too focused on Emily to get emotional.
But she'd lied to herself.
She was a nervous wreck.
Seeing Emily completely at the mercy of her body sent her spiraling. She felt like she was choking. With every passing minute the hospital room was getting smaller.
It was the same sensation she'd had when she was little and she was afraid of crossing the road. She felt like a scared child. She was a scared child.
She had a rush of different emotions flooding her mind. She wanted to run and hide, and that made her feel incredibly guilty. She hated that she was thinking about herself when her girlfriend was in labor. She hated herself even more when she stepped out for a few minutes while Emily was sleeping.
Emily's mother was sitting in the room with them. She had been for a while, but Alison had been too focused on Emily to notice. It was only in the silence that she realized how small the room was around them. She told Emily's mom she was going to make a quick phone call and that if Emily woke up to tell her she'd be right back.
She scurried out into the hallway. She looked around at all the people in scrubs, her gaze going from one end of the hallway to the other. She wasn't sure where she was or how to get out. She took a left and then another left and ended up lost.
As she was rounding the corner she nearly ran over Emily's dad. She muttered out an apology and looked up at him, frazzled.
"I…I'm getting ice chips." She lied. Though, maybe getting ice chips was a good idea.
He studied the look on her face, picking up on her tension. Her eyes were darting around. Her face was completely devoid of color. When he looked at her all he could think about was how young she and his daughter were.
"I'm sure my wife can handle that. How about we go outside for some air?"
Suddenly, the idea of being away from Emily was worse than the clutches of the paralyzing fear she felt of being trapped. She wanted to be there, but she also didn't want to feel suffocated. She was torn.
"I don't want to miss the birth."
"She still has a ways to go, kiddo."
It made Alison flinch. It had been five hours. And before that she'd been at her house in pre-labor for five hours. How much longer could it last?
"Come on." He craned his neck to the side to motion towards the exit. "It's about pacing yourself."
He led the way, and she followed.
She stared at his shoes the entire time they were walking. She had the strange thought that Emily had a similar gait. She imagined they probably went hiking together. She was very much a daddy's girl. Alison didn't know what that was like. Her dad ruled by fear. She wasn't a mommy's girl either. She'd often felt like an orphan, though her bank account didn't reflect that. She was more of an emotional orphan.
When she looked up they were in a garden near the atrium of the hospital. Wayne was observing some of the early blooming summer flowers. The way he scrutinized the colorful buds reminded Alison of the way Emily observed the leaves in the autumn. She had gotten her love of fall from him.
Alison felt a strange urge to connect with him. She barely knew him. He was simply her girlfriend's father, but at that moment he felt more like home than her own home.
"It's pretty out here." Alison looked around.
"Been here for forever, too. I remember back before they added the extra addition." He delicately slipped his index and middle finger open and slid them around a stem of a rose, gently cupping the bud in his palm. "You know…" He glanced at Alison. "Emily was born here in this hospital."
"She was?" Alison peered at him curiously.
"Best day of my life was when I met my little girl." He smiled. "It's funny, because we were living on base at the time and we'd planned for her to be born there. But my Emmy…she had other plans. Her mom went into labor while she was here visiting a friend. My stubborn child." He shook his head with a laugh. "It's like she felt like she was destined to be here."
"When she has a destination she's very hardheaded about getting there." Alison laughed. Whether it was a trip they were taking on the bike, a place she wanted to go for dinner, or an idea about life choices.
The only destination they hadn't set course for yet was their future. It was intimidating to think about. She had theorized about it for months, but now that the future was actually happening it was a lot more than she'd anticipated. She wasn't ready.
Wayne seemed to pick up on what she was thinking.
"You and Emmy are both very young…"
Alison bit down on her tongue. That was not the way she wanted the conversation to turn.
"I love her, sir…"
She felt her face get hot as soon as she said it. She really didn't have much practice talking to parents that weren't her own, and they talked to each other much differently.
"It's Wayne." He put his palm up in the air, motioning for her to stop and take a breath. "And I know you love her. That hasn't been a secret since you spotted her hopping down off the moving truck our first day back."
"You saw me that day?" She grimaced in embarrassment.
"Of course I did. I see everything. Military, remember?" He winked.
"Right."
"Your love for her isn't what I was getting at. I only meant to say that I know this overwhelming because you haven't dealt with anything like this before."
"Oh." Now she was even more embarrassed.
"I remember what it felt like when Pam was in labor with Emily. I didn't know what to do then." He stopped walking and sighed. "Still don't know now that it's Emily." He faced Alison. "It's okay to be afraid."
It was strange to get permission, but she felt like hearing it made it okay. She was afraid, on so many levels. But she was too prideful to admit it.
"Thank you, Mr. Fields."
"Wayne." He corrected her again. "If my grandbaby is going to be calling you Mama we should skip the formalities, don't you think?"
Alison couldn't bring herself to call him by his first name. She also couldn't get past the fact that he thought of her as his granddaughter's other mother.
Mama. It had a ring to it.
She smiled.
They walked through the garden, silently taking in the beauty. It helped re-center Alison. After they made the round Wayne glanced at her, trying to gauge how she was doing.
"Ready to get back in there?" he asked.
Mama. She thought to herself again.
She felt giddy.
"Yeah." She nodded. "Yeah, I think I am."
The fresh air ended up being exactly what she needed to rejuvenate her. Her talk with Emily's father had put things in perspective. And it validated her feelings. It made her feel heard. Because she hadn't realized that she was going through something major, too.
When she got back to Emily's room she saw her sitting up, wide awake. She'd clearly just gotten through a rough contraction. Her mother was standing by her side, gripping her hand.
Wayne glanced at Pam and gave her a look that only someone who had thirty years of marriage connecting them could understand.
Give them some time.
Pam nodded at her husband. She spoke softly to Emily. Emily muttered out a tired reply.
As Pam walked out of the room Alison walked back in.
She walked over next to Emily's bed. Emily silently reached for her hand. She could see the mixed emotions written all over Alison's face. She wasn't so far removed from the situation that she didn't understand that Alison needed her, too.
There was so much they wanted to say, but there were no words to say it. Instead, they spoke with their actions. A hand touch. A soft kiss. The gentle caress of Emily's hand against Alison's face.
Alison felt terrible for leaving her. Emily had asked for one thing. And that was for her to be there. She swallowed her pride and finally found the verbal section of her brain.
"I'm sorry I left," she said tearfully.
Emily looked surprised, then sympathetic. She wasn't upset. She was concerned. She didn't want Alison to feel undue pressure.
"Hey, you need breaks, too." She squeezed Alison's hand. "This is a lot. I understand, Alison. We're in this together."
There was a beat of silence. Alison held eye contact with her, her expression softening. She fell in love with the brunette every time she looked at her.
It was crazy the way they had fallen so hard so fast. It was crazy that they were having a baby together. They were teenagers. They had just graduated high school. And they were going to be moms.
Alison looked at the exhausted girl sitting in front of her. She was beautiful even in all of her weary sweaty glory.
She loved her. She loved her more than anything.
"I'm here, Em." She traced her thumb over Emily's knuckles. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.
Emily smiled at her, her response as simple as the love she had for her,
"I know."
o ~ O ~ o
After an additional thirteen hours of grueling labor, Emily had finally reached the point where they wanted her to push. They moved her to the labor and delivery room. She said a tearful "I love you" to her parents before she was wheeled away with Alison by her side.
They got her set up in a sterile area and adjusted the bed, telling her that it was almost time to push.
Alison stood next to her, wrapping her arm around Emily's, their hands in a tight embrace. Emily felt her heart skipping around in her chest.
Apprehension. Anticipation. Excitement.
She looked up at Alison, who was dressed up in a blue surgical gown. She looked so professional. She would have made an exceptionally hot doctor. Then again, she was an exceptionally hot person.
Alison lowered herself down to Emily's level, kissing her cheek.
"We're almost there," Alison said through tears of joy.
"I'm going to meet my baby girl." Emily sobbed with a huge smile on her face.
"I'm so proud of you."
Emily felt them adjusting her legs against the edge of the table. It made her feel a little vulnerable that there were so many people, but at the same time she was too tired to give a shit.
The contractions were brutal. She thought some of the earlier ones were the "big ones" but she was at a point where she was having contractions every thirty seconds. It was constant.
Alison stayed by her side, encouraging her.
The doctor talked to the girls about how it worked. She wanted them to know what to expect. They understood and they tried to follow her plan.
Once they got her set up they wasted no time in getting her to push. Her baby was ready and she was ready to come now.
After the first push Emily didn't even have to be told what to do. Her body fell in line naturally.
They counted out the timing of how long she pushed. It felt like an eternity. Every time they told her to rest she looked into her girlfriend's eyes, trying to stay focused, trying not to pass out.
She started to feel lightheaded. She wasn't getting any breaks between her contractions. It was like several hot blades stabbing her at once. The non-stop pressure and the muscle aches from all of the straining had her pain levels at an all-time high.
She bared down on a huge contraction and it felt like it broke something inside of her. Her pelvis felt like it had shattered into tiny little pieces. Her body was exploding from the inside.
She yelped out a string of profanities. She hadn't been ready for the unwavering pressure and agony the birth was going to put her through, but she kept going. Her doctors and nursing staff and Alison were her cheering squad.
She felt the pressure in her lower body drop. She could feel the shift internally and she could feel the pressure building again. The contractions weren't even the hardest part. It was finding the energy to push.
She went through several more waves of contractions that got increasingly stronger, but she found a way to breathe through them. It was strange, because pushing intensified the workload and the pain, but she wanted to push. Her body needed to push. The urge was a strong primal instinct that she couldn't ignore.
Emily snapped her head back and let out a low-moaned wail. She squeezed Alison's hand with one hand and nearly ripped the sheets in half with her other hand.
Once the contraction stopped they gave her a brief reprieve from pushing. It went on for nearly twenty minutes.
"We're right where we need to be." The doctor tapped her knee encouragingly. "We've got another big one coming."
Emily glared at the doctor. She was certain she had never hated anyone more. It wasn't the woman's fault. It was just the idea of complete strangers staring at the most private parts of her body. And they were standing on the sidelines cheerleading while she was shoving something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a grape.
"Ugh." Emily huffed, out of breath, but like a trooper she sat up and readied herself for the next round.
She choked out something between a grunt and a sob and started pushing again. Her entire face felt like it was on fire. Her cheeks flushed. She could feel the sweat dripping down her brow.
She grunted and pressed down hard, lowering her head and giving her body everything that she had. She forgot to breathe, so when she reached the end of the push she nearly toppled backwards.
"Just keep breathing. Just like we practiced." Alison pushed her forehead against Emily's temple and squeezed her hand.
Give her my strength. Please give her my strength to get through this. Whatever she needs. Alison didn't know what else to do. So she prayed.
Emily nodded, turning to push her forehead against Alison's. She drew in a shaky breath before she got ready for the next round of pushing.
She pushed again. Then again. She pushed over and over. She listened to the doctor steadily counting out her contractions.
She rested when they told her to rest.
"You're doing great." Alison encouraged her.
"I'm so fucking tired." Emily's face was bright red. The whites of her eyes were bloodshot and filled with tears. The sweat on her body was so thick that even her hair was covered in it. "I can't…"
"You can." Alison squeezed her hand. They were so close. "You can do this, Em. I know it hurts, but just think about her. Think about how amazing it's going to be to see her."
Emily managed to get through another two contractions while pushing before she collapsed again.
"Come on, mama, you're just a few pushes away." The doctor encouraged.
A swell of pain ripped through her. Emily let out a scream. Alison's eyes widened in surprise. She'd never heard anything like her cries before. Childbirth truly belonged in a category all on its own.
"You're doing great. I can see the head." The doctor reached between her legs.
Alison's eyes lit up in excitement. Hearing that Emily's little girl was making her way into the world piqued her interest. She stood on the tips of her toes and leaned forward, trying to get a look at the baby. She felt a strong pull to the little girl.
Emily could feel something happening. She could feel her body changing. It motivated her. She clenched her jaw and gritted her teeth and pushed again.
She was beginning to see spots in her eyes. She felt like shards of glass were digging into her back. Everything below her waist was on fire. She could feel every nerve ending in her body aflame.
Alison leaned forward even further, trying to see over the blue privacy drape. The doctor's hands slowly retracted, the tips of her fingers supporting the baby's head. Alison could see dark waves of hair. She felt like melting. Her breath seized in her chest. She was seeing Emily's child for the first time. Her eyes welled up with tears.
"I see her. I can see her little head." Alison marveled at the sight.
She wasn't at all disturbed by the vivid twists of colorful imagery or the fact that Emily's entire body looked completely different. Not even the blood bothered her. It concerned her, but it didn't bother her.
It was strange, but at the same time it was beautiful.
It hit her that she was watching Emily's daughter coming into the world.
Oh God. Oh my God. She's real.
Of course she knew she was real, but seeing her was almost too much for her brain to process.
The feeling of Emily's hand tightening around hers drew her attention back to the brunette. She whipped her head towards Emily and immediately turned her attention back to her. There was an anguished look of pain on her face.
"You're almost there." Alison stroked her head and kissed her temple. "You're almost there."
"And…rest." The doctor glanced at the monitor, watching her contractions. "You've got about ten seconds before the next one. And it's going to be a big one."
"This is it." Alison tried to keep her focused.
Emily was so exhausted. She wasn't sure she had anything left. But when she felt the urge to push again she came to life. She leaned up in the bed. The stabbing sensation in her back was intense. She felt like her body was folding in two.
She tilted her head down, pushing her chin to her chest. She tightened her grip on Alison's hand, letting out a pained scream. She started huffing. She felt strong pelvic motions, constricting and contracting. Her hearing started to fade out as she wavered between the realm of conscious and unconscious.
But then she felt something slip, the pressure on her spine trickling away. She saw the doctor's hands move. There was a lot of movement happening.
"You did it. She's out!" Alison exclaimed.
Broken cries filled the air. Emily heard the noise and immediately sat up, looking for her baby. It was as if a switch had been flipped on inside of her. Her body craved her child's touch. She knew her baby needed her.
She saw a blob of dark hair in the midst of the flurry of activity. Hands with towels cleaning her, moving her around, stimulating her breathy cries. Her little body was shivering as she adjusted to the new world around her.
Emily started crying. It didn't feel real. It was the purest and most tangible moment of her entire life.
They placed the infant against her bare chest and she felt something change…something shift. The little girl stopped squirming long enough to nuzzle closer to her mommy's skin.
Seconds old and she was already rooting around, searching for the warmth of her mother's bosom. The contact opened up an entirely new channel of communication. She could sense her baby's needs. She knew exactly what her child was saying to her.
Mommy. My mommy.
She looked down, her chest heaving with sobs.
Her heart was outside her body.
Her little girl was in the world.
Her eyes were brilliant. Her tiny hands and feet were delicate. It was hard to imagine those little hands and feet creating such a stir in her body, punching and kicking. They were so little. Her fingers were the tiniest things she'd ever seen.
The shade of her skin was a blend of hers and Isaac's, though she was lighter than Isaac. Emily knew she would darken over time.
Her cheeks were flushed from the crying. Her mouth was open as she searched for the comfort of her mother's chest. Her hair was dark. Her eyes were open wide, staring at her mom. There was a purity in her gaze. A bright-eyed innocence like nothing Emily had ever seen before.
Her eyes were a greyish hazel color, so shiny that Emily could almost see her own reflection in them. She felt like she was looking into Isaac's grandfather's eyes. She had Isaac's brow and his scowl, right down to the concerned frown on her tiny little lips. She had her facial features, including her nose and chin. She was an amazing mix of the two of them. She was the most beautiful baby Emily had ever seen.
She instinctively lifted her hand and put it against her small frame. The baby's head bobbed against her, like she was searching for something.
"Oh my God." Emily heaved, cries of joy racking her body. "Oh my God. Hi, baby." She cradled her in between her breasts. "Hi."
The exhaustion was worth it. The pain was worth it. The feeling she had in her heart would last a lifetime. She understood exactly what her mother had said to her in her early hours of labor.
"It was like you were my reason to live. My heart was yours, and you were mine."
"Oh…my girl." She had waited a lifetime to meet her. "My sweet girl." She tipped her head forward and pressed her lips against her daughter's soft head.
She took a deep breath through her nose, letting her child fill every one of her senses. She had a sweet smell. She wanted to bathe in the moment. She wanted to drink in every second of her daughter's life.
She didn't hear the click of Alison's camera capturing the interaction. She was too lost in the moment.
A feeling of euphoria washed over her. There was something surreal about it. It was like time had stopped. All she could see was the little human she'd grown to love the past nine and half months.
Alison watched Emily connect with her baby as silent tears streamed down her face. She cried even harder when Emily looked up at her and wordlessly moved Alison's hand towards her daughter's head. There was a quiet moment as the three of them connected.
The baby grunted and squeaked, her face buried in her mom's chest.
"Look at her." Emily laughed through her tears. "Look at this perfect little human."
"I haven't taken my eyes off her." Alison kissed Emily's sweaty head. "You did it."
She watched as the newborn turned her cheek and nuzzled Emily's skin. Her large eyes landed on Alison. Her teeny little brow furrowed, like she was concentrating, like she recognized Alison's voice.
"She's perfect, Em."
She stroked the baby's cheek and leaned forward. Emily turned her head and their lips met softly. The embrace was salty and sweet. Salty from the sweat and the labor and the tears. Sweet from the love that was radiating between them. Alison put her forehead against Emily's, both of them gleefully crying.
For a few glorious moments they forgot they were in a room full of people.
The doctor cleared her throat, hesitating to interrupt the moment.
"Do you want to cut the umbilical cord?" The doctor looked at Alison.
Alison faced Emily with an eager smile. They hadn't talked about cutting the cord. Something about solidifying the baby's birth into the world made Alison feel important.
"Can I?"
Emily stroked her daughter's head. She still couldn't believe she was real. Her child was already her entire world.
"Of course."
The doctor instructed Alison on where to cut the umbilical cord. The blonde carefully followed her instructions.
Cutting the ties was more than symbolic to her. She was ushering the infant into a whole new world. A world that she was a part of.
"Do you have a name yet, Mama?" The nurse put a small blanket over the baby.
Alison peered at Emily. She had waited months to learn the baby's name. She had been impatient since she found out Emily had an idea, but wouldn't tell her. Emily looked at Alison, a twinkle in her soft brown eyes.
"Autumn." Emily had a tired smile on her face. She ran her palm over her daughter's head with one hand and reached for Alison's hand with her other. She looked up at the blonde and then down at her baby. "Her name is Autumn Violet Fields."
The name had come to her in a dream. Fall colors. Bright September sun. A little girl who was lively and beautiful and exuded the beauty of autumn. All the crisp wonderful colors exploding into an endless blue sky.
The colors of the rainbow were so succinct and unique, but together created a rich tapestry, an anomaly of colors that fit together so perfectly.
Violet had fallen naturally into line with the name Autumn. All Emily could think about when she thought about her little girl was how colorful her world was because she was in it. And it served as a reminder of the day that she'd been reintroduced to the girl she loved.
They'd argued about the color purple.
Autumn Violet embodied everything she loved.
"Autumn." Alison murmured with a smile, marveling at the newborn. "Autumn Violet Fields." She slipped her finger over Autumn's tiny little hand.
Autumn latched on to Alison immediately, gripping her finger. And her heart. The child had her hooked for life. Alison was in love.
"It's perfect, Indigo Girl." She felt tears burning her eyes. "Hi, Autumn. Hi, sweetie."
The medical staff let them enjoy the moment, but they had to take her and clean her up and get her warmed up.
Emily glanced at the nurse and then looked at Alison. She tipped her chin up and motioned for her to watch after the baby.
Alison let her hand slip out of Emily's and walked across the room, watching as the nurse weighed her and checked her reflexes. She took several pictures. She expected Autumn to cry, but the little girl was looking around curiously. She had her mother's calm nature.
She was a little fussy. She sucked on her tiny fist and made gurgling noises.
She didn't like her nose and mouth getting suctioned out.
She screamed when the nurse handled her. Alison didn't like seeing her squirm. She shot the woman a dirty look for upsetting her, even though she knew it was part of her job.
After getting her vitals the woman cleaned her gently and laid her down against a blanket. Alison peered over her shoulder nervously, trying to make sure she did it right. The nurse swaddled her and put a little hat on her head to prevent heat loss. She picked her up.
"Would you like to hold her?" She questioned.
The question caught Alison off-guard. She knew it shouldn't have, but it did.
"I…" Alison glanced at Autumn. "I don't know how."
She was suddenly forgetting everything they'd learned in the childbirth class. Because Autumn wasn't just a plastic doll. She was a living breathing moving infant. What if she hurt her?
The nurse could sense her nerves. She smiled politely at the young girl.
"You just have to support her head." She showed Alison, demonstrating for her.
She slowly passed the baby over to the blonde, who felt a panic rising in her chest. She had very little experience with babies. In fact, before meeting Emily she didn't like them much. They were just tiny poop-machines that cried and slept a lot.
But it was different with Emily's daughter. She didn't feel any of those things. The moment the baby was in her arms Alison felt something surge through her.
Her cheeks felt wet, and she realized she was crying again, but they were the sweetest tears she had ever known.
Autumn's little face scrunched up as she looked up at Alison, like she was scrutinizing her. Her arms and legs were moving around beneath the blanket.
It was odd to feel what Emily had been feeling for nine months. She could imagine the little girl twisting and kicking from inside her body. She felt her foot move against the blanket and smiled. She would know that karate chop anywhere.
The newborn tried to stretch under the blanket. She'd had a taste of her freedom and she wanted to splay out, but after several seconds she settled down.
She closed her mouth, her face relaxing. She let out a sigh through her nose and a quiet sniffing wheezing noise came out. It was like music to Alison's ears. Her gurgles and baby talk were the cutest noises she'd ever heard.
Her lips twisted in a concerned way and little lines appeared on her forehead. She looked exactly like Emily.
"She's so small." Alison couldn't believe that people started out so tiny.
Autumn twisted her head and started squirming again. She was getting restless. Her cheeks turned red and she let out a fussy cry.
Alison instinctively knew what to do. She bounced her gently and shushed her.
"You're okay." Her voice came out soothing and calm.
The moment the baby heard her voice she stopped crying. She moved her head around, her eyes open wide as she looked up at Alison.
"You are so beautiful, Autumn. So beautiful." She lifted the infant up, pressing her lips against her head.
Autumn opened her mouth and squeaked quietly. Her eyes looked curiously at the adult holding her.
"I wished for you," she said quietly. "I wished for your mom, and then I got double the joy in you."
She looked across the room at Emily. She was leaning back against the bed, which was angled up slightly. She still hadn't caught her breath. She looked so exhausted, but she was radiant in every way.
Her brow was wet and her eyes were heavy. She had given childbirth every last ounce of her energy, but she still had the energy to flash Alison her beautiful smile.
She had been watching Alison with Autumn the entire time.
Alison walked over to her, still gently bouncing the baby to keep her calm. Emily found the strength to lean forward as Alison bent down to hand her the baby.
Emily cradled her daughter, gently rocking her. She was still shaking, but Alison couldn't tell if it was from pain or elation. She lifted the newborn up and kissed her head. She was so wrapped up in her daughter that she didn't even see Alison take a picture of the moment.
Autumn's mouth twitched and she pulled her arm free from her blanket. Her movements were awkward and uncoordinated, like she didn't know what she was supposed to do with all her free space.
Her little hand was balled up in a fist as she moved her arm around. She curled her elbow up and moved her arm against her chest, loosening her fist.
"I can't believe she's ours." Emily fawned over her.
Alison choked back a joyful sob when she heard ours. She whimpered quietly under her breath and leaned down so that her cheek was pressed against Emily's forehead. She felt Emily's eyelashes like feathery wisps tickling her face.
She reached out and touched Autumn's head. She pressed a kiss against Emily's overheated brow and then looked down at Autumn again.
They stared at her in awe. It felt like a dream.
Emily put her index finger against Autumn's hand. When she touched the newborn's palm, Autumn reflexively wrapped her fingers around Emily's finger. She had a strong grip.
It was unreal to her that her finger was bigger than Autumn's entire hand. She was so little.
Alison hovered over the bed. Neither one of them were paying attention to the medical staff surrounding them.
Alison leaned down until her face was level with Emily's. Emily lifted Autumn's hand and kissed her impossibly tiny fingers. Then she leaned over and pecked Alison's lips.
Her girls.
She loved them.
She loved them so much.
"Thank you," she said, almost breathlessly, "for taking this leap with me. Thank you for being here…for being everything we needed and more."
"Thank you for letting me." Alison touched her face. "You chose me, Emily. You chose me to do this with you…to be here for this moment, and I…I can't…this is…" She was too choked up to finish. She huffed out a noise between a laugh and a sob.
Witnessing Autumn's birth had been life altering. She had seen Emily in an entirely new light. And she had discovered what it felt like to love unconditionally. The entire journey was a series of beautiful moments that she would treasure for the rest of her life.
They shared another kiss, then looked at one another with watery eyes, their smiles lighting up the room.
"You are incredible. You know that?" Alison asked, cupping her cheek. She had never loved Emily more. "Just look at her…" Their gaze drifted to the baby in her arms. "You did that."
She reached out to tickle Autumn's cheek. Autumn's nose scrunched up and she made a soft grunting noise.
"I couldn't have done it without you." Emily murmured with an exhausted smile on her face. "We did it." She exhaled quietly.
"You are so beautiful." Alison said, tears burning her eyes. She kissed Emily's forehead. "So beautiful and so strong. I love you so much." She shifted her attention to the infant, delicately stroking her head.
"Mmm." Emily nodded, closing her eyes. Her head felt strange. She thought it was the labor catching up with her. "I love you, Alison."
She felt a wave of exhaustion. Her head suddenly felt too heavy for her neck to support. Her arms felt weak.
The doctor, who was still sitting near the end of her bed turned and mentioned something to one of the nurses, but Emily didn't hear what she was saying.
A cool rush washed over her. An icy chill ran through her veins. The endorphins were wearing off, and her body was screaming at her.
Alison was so busy looking at the baby that she didn't see the blood drain from Emily's cheeks. It was only when Emily gasped and snatched Alison's hand that she got her attention.
Something was wrong.
"Emily?" Alison swiped her cheek in concern.
"Something isn't…right." Her vision was becoming cloudy. "I feel…" Her head started swaying on her neck. She managed to lift Autumn up. "Take her."
"What?"
"Take the baby. I…I can't…"
Alison reached for the newborn without having to be asked again.
She saw the nurses scrambling. There was a pensive look on the doctor's face.
Emily's eyes widened as she fell back against the bed. She felt faint. She felt Alison grip her hand.
"Stay." Emily mumbled. "Stay with her…please…" Her lips trembled. Alison noticed they were a strange tinge of white. "I don't…don't want her alone…"
Alison saw something flicker in her eyes.
"Em, what's going on?"
Emily's hand slipped away from hers and her head went slack against the mattress. Her body went limp in the bed. Seconds later a nurse was by her side.
Machines started screaming. Nurses were shouting. The doctor was doing something with Emily. It was total chaos.
Alison looked around in shock. The nurse who had assisted in the labor reached to take Autumn from her arms.
Alison was torn on what to do. She watched as a bunch of people in scrubs surrounded Emily.
"What's happening?" Alison asked desperately.
Another nurse whisked her away from Emily's bedside. Alison heard the baby screaming and she whipped around and saw her being placed in a pediatric medical crib by another nurse and being wheeled away so they could make room for the staff to work on Emily.
"Wait, where are you taking her?" Panic flooded her senses. Was she losing them both? "Don't take her!" She raised her voice, but it was barely enough to echo over the shouts of the medical team. "Please don't take her!"
She heard a barrage of voices chattering.
"She's hemorrhaging…"
"…placenta is…
"…blood pressure dropping…"
"…need to get her out of here…"
The nurse who had guided her away from Emily touched her arm.
"I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to step into the waiting room."
"Is she okay?" Alison looked over the nurse's shoulder. "She's going to be okay, right?"
Tears flooded her cheeks. The nursing staff and the doctors had Emily surrounded. Alison couldn't see her anymore.
"We're going to do everything we can for her." The nurse promised.
"Where's the baby? Where is Autumn? Is she okay?"
"She's perfectly healthy. She just needs to be put in the nursery for the moment."
"Can I please go be with her?" The little girl would be so scared. She couldn't imagine being that tiny and helpless and alone. "I have to stay with her. Please. I promised."
The nurse nodded and gestured towards the door. Alison turned around and tried to get another look at Emily, but she couldn't see her. Her throat bobbed.
She would be okay. She had to be okay.
Alison tried to focus on what Emily had told her. She didn't want the baby alone. Emily had done all of the hard work. Alison just needed to do one simple thing. And that was be there for Autumn.
She followed the nurse into the nursery. The woman explained that they didn't use it very often because most babies stayed in the rooms with their mothers, but every so often they needed a break or the mother had to be taken somewhere.
Alison looked down into Autumn's temporary crib. She seemed warm and comfortable wrapped up in her blanket and her little hat.
"Hey, Autumn." Her voice trembled. She was trying to keep it together. Her mommy was strong, and that's the one hope that Alison was holding on to.
The infant smacked her lips and a gurgling sound came out. Alison reached out to touch her cheek.
She was fragile, like glass. Alison was afraid the world might break her. She thought about what was going on with Emily, and it pained her. If the worst happened and the doctors weren't able to save her she wouldn't just lose her girlfriend. Autumn would lose her mother.
Alison reached down and traced her finger over the hospital bracelet around the infant's wrist.
Autumn Violet Fields.
The name was perfect.
She would do great things in life. Alison just knew it.
The nurse saw her playing with the bracelet.
"I was just getting ready to start on the paperwork for the birth certificate. It looks like they have her name and the mother's name in the system. I assume you're going to be listed as the secondary parent?"
"I…" She glanced at the tiny baby in the crib. "I…um…I'm not sure. We were talking about it…"
She wasn't sure what she was to Autumn. She just knew she was in love with her, and that she was terrified about what was going on with her girlfriend.
She was trying. She wanted to be a pillar of strength, but she felt like she was failing. It was overwhelming to try and waver it alone.
She looked down at Autumn. As she was staring at her something hit her.
She wasn't alone.
Pam and Wayne were sitting out in the waiting room.
She felt her stomach churning.
Had someone told them what was happening yet?
"Her grandparents are here. Can they come back, too?" Alison asked hopefully.
"Of course. You'll want to tell them to meet you at the maternity corridors. It's down the hallway and to the left. The girls at the front desk can access the doors to let them in."
"Oh…I…" She kept her eyes on the baby. "I can't take her with me?"
The nurse shook her head.
"It's protocol for newborns to stay in the nursery with someone from the nursing staff to monitor them."
"But I promised…" She reached down and touched Autumn's cheek again, eliciting a quiet whimper from the infant.
The nurse saw her struggling.
"Can I offer you some advice?" She pried gently.
Alison looked up at her, her eyes narrow in suspicion as she scrutinized the stranger. As a rule, she didn't trust anyone, but there was something comforting about her eyes. It was clear she'd seen a lot of new parents come through the hospital. It was written all over her face.
"Pace yourself," she suggested. "Everything you're feeling right now can be incredibly overwhelming." She looked down at Autumn. "You have to learn to take things in small increments, and you have to learn to stop and breathe." She reached down to straighten the hat on the infant's head. "Why don't you go get your family?"
Your family.
She supposed she was part of the Fields family now.
She reached for her phone and glanced at all her missed messages. She was too tired to deal with them. She scrolled through until she found Emily's mother's number.
She didn't have the strength to call her and tell her what was going on over the phone. Instead, she texted and said she wanted to meet them at the maternity entrance. Pam was quick to respond that they would be there.
She quietly promised the newborn she'd be right back and then went to get them. She glanced back as she was leaving the room to make sure the baby was okay. She seemed perfectly content in her crib. The nurse was being very attentive.
She hadn't thought about what could happen if she left her alone. The strict protocols at the hospital had given her a false sense of security. The shock to her system had her thinking unclearly. The months of threats and torture were the furthest thing from her mind. The danger didn't seem real at that moment.
As she walked towards the entrance she didn't see the person in scrubs ducking around a corner, hiding behind a surgical mask. She didn't know that there had been someone patiently waiting for the right moment to make a move.
Once Alison disappeared the masked intruder started slinking towards the nursery.
The labor and delivery room had sounded chaotic from the outside. Going in there had been out of the question. It had been far too crowded to try anything. It had been a stroke of luck that something had gone wrong after the birth and that Emily had been separated from the baby.
There was a nurse caring for the newborn in the nursery. It was hard to get a good look at the infant from through the thick plexiglass.
Latex-gloved fingertips slid against the glass.
o ~ O ~ o
The nurse monitoring the reception area was nice. She was kind and pleasant and opened the door when Emily's parents arrived.
Alison took one look at their faces and she realized that no one had had the time to update them on what was happening with Emily. She didn't even know what was going on with her.
Pam and Wayne both had eager looks of excitement on their faces.
Alison slowly walked up to them in a complete daze. She felt like she was being dragged down in quicksand. It felt like a nightmare, and she wanted to wake up. Her face was frozen in a state of shock.
Pam and Wayne saw her approaching, but they hadn't read the look on her face yet. It was only when they met her halfway that they saw she'd been crying.
Pam's look of elation turned into apprehension. She reached towards her out of instinct, cupping the younger girl's cheeks, wiping away the trails of tears.
"What is it? What's wrong?"
Alison opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Her brain wasn't processing words. She huffed out a sob and started shivering. Her shoulders slumped as she started to cry again. She collapsed into Wayne's open arms.
Pam's eyes widened in terror.
"Are Emily and the baby okay?" Pam's voice hitched in her throat.
"I don't…" Alison tried to catch her breath. "I don't know. Everything seemed okay. She had the baby…she was so amazing. And the baby is perfect." She smiled through her tears. "Emily was fine. I thought she was fine. One minute she was happy, awake and talking to me. And the next…" Her voice was strained. "I don't know what happened. She passed out. I wanted to stay with her, but they wouldn't let me. They took the baby…they're with her in the nursery. She's okay." Another smile when she thought about Autumn's little face. "I knew you'd want to be with her."
"Wayne…" Pam gripped his arm for support. Her voice was wavering. She was on the verge of crying.
He held his hand up to prevent further panic. His eyes darted from Alison to his wife.
"Let's go check on the baby and then we'll see if we can't find out what's going on with Em." He put his hand on the small of his wife's back and motioned for her to follow his lead.
Alison led the way. She was eager to get back to the infant's side.
When they walked into the nursery the first thing she noticed was that Autumn's crib was empty. She froze, a cold feeling washing over her. She felt like her heart had stopped in her body.
She opened her mouth to scream for help, ready to shout whatever the code was for a kidnapping when she saw the nurse walking around a corner with Autumn in her arms.
"Someone needed a fresh diaper," she smiled when she saw them. "You must be the grandparents."
Out of the corner of her eye Alison saw a wide grin on Wayne's face. His eyes were on the baby in the nurse's arms.
Pam gasped and reached up to grip her husband's bicep, tears springing to her eyes. It hit them that they were grandparents.
Autumn smacked her lips and made a little self-soothing sound. It was something that Emily had done as a newborn.
When she was placed in Wayne's arms she curled up against herself and her face tensed up. She yawned and then opened her eyes, staring up at him.
"Would you get a look at those eyes?" He was captured by her beauty immediately.
Alison could see the exact instant they fell in love with her. She could see it in their eyes.
Pam curled her fingertip underneath her blanket, tucking it in neatly. Then she touched her cheek with her index finger.
"She looks just like Emily." She would never forget what her daughter looked like when she was born, and the newborn in her husband's arms looked exactly like Emily, except for her eyes and her coloring. She'd inherited a few things from Isaac's side of the family.
With the exception of Emily, she was the most beautiful child Pam had ever seen. She thought of her own daughter, deep in the pits of the hospital somewhere, her fate hanging in an unknown balance.
She hadn't stopped praying since Emily went into labor. She was praying double-time now. She had to have faith that the doctors and nurses would take care of her baby. In the meantime, she knew they needed to take care of Emily's baby.
The conflicting emotions were tearing Pam apart. She was thrilled to meet the little girl, but she was apprehensive of the life ahead of her. The idea of her child having a child was still hard for her to grasp.
She didn't realize it, but she was digging her nails into Wayne's arm. He glanced at the nurse.
"Is there any way we can get an update on our daughter?"
He was so calm. Alison wasn't sure how he was keeping it together. She was an emotional wreck. She was losing her mind, though when she looked at Autumn it all seemed to fade away and she felt more in control.
"I made a notation in her chart that we're in the nursery. They will come find us as soon as they have news."
"Where is she?" Pam asked. "What's going on?"
"I'm not sure yet, but I'll put in a phone call to try to find out."
Autumn stirred in Wayne's arms, like she knew they were talking about her mom.
"Shh," Wayne said in a soothing voice. "It's okay, baby girl."
"Emily…she um…she told me…" She struggled to find the right words. What if she'd heard the last words that Emily would ever speak to her? "…her name is Autumn. Autumn Violet."
A tiny hint of a smile twitched on Wayne's lips. Of course his child would name her baby after her favorite thing in the world. Of course she would take something as meaningful as the beauty of nature and bestow it upon her little girl.
Violet was an added bonus. He laughed when he realized that she'd probably done it because of her obsession with dyeing her hair purple.
"Autumn Violet Fields." Wayne murmured, gently rocking the newborn in his arms.
Alison watched the interaction. She watched as Pam and Wayne passed her back and forth and spoke to her. She kept her eyes on the baby the whole time. She seemed to be taking everything in.
She was drawn out of her thoughts by her phone buzzing in her pocket. She looked at the screen. She had several unanswered texts. There were a few from Hanna that got increasingly more frantic as time passed.
What's going on?
Any updates?
No baby yet?
HELLO?
Do the girls and I need to cut the road trip short and come back there? I'll pull that baby out of her myself if I have to.
The most recent one was from Isaac,
Everything okay? Anything yet?
Alison bit down on her lip. She remembered all too well how he'd handled Emily being in the hospital the last time. She didn't want to tell him, but she couldn't keep him in the dark. It wasn't fair. She couldn't just tell him that the baby had been born, because he would ask how Emily was doing. She couldn't lie about that, because if she said Emily was fine then he'd want to call and talk to her.
She begrudgingly dialed his number. He was excited when he picked up the phone. She hated to crush his spirits.
He listened quietly as Alison replayed the last few minutes that they'd been in the delivery room. He was worried, but he didn't spin out the way he did when Emily collapsed on prom night.
As they were getting ready to hang up he softly interjected,
"Would you mind sending me a picture of her? Of Autumn?"
She could hear the warm tone in his voice when he said her name. It gave her an odd sense of comfort.
"Of course." Alison replied. Before she hung up she added, "Isaac?"
"Yeah?"
"She is absolutely perfect."
After they got off the phone Alison took several pictures of the baby. She finally captured one of Autumn in her arms and sent it to him.
His response took a few minutes. She could only imagine that he was admiring her beauty.
Oh my God.
Alison replied,
I know.
She is beautiful. Thank God she got Emily's ears. I looked like Dumbo as a kid.
Alison responded with a half-hearted,
Lol.
There was silence, then Isaac sent a follow up message,
She'll be okay. You know Emily. She's a scrapper.
Yeah.
Let me know what I can do to help.
Isaac had turned out to be a good friend to have. She saw what Emily had seen in him. He was kind. He was loyal. He was funny. He was everything she wanted Autumn to be.
Alison stayed with Autumn and the Fields family as they waited on news about Emily. They took turns holding her. She didn't spend any time in the rollaway crib. They were spoiling her.
Cradling her and playing with her helped ease some of the tension, but after half an hour passed Alison was starting to worry.
"Why haven't we heard anything yet?" She was pacing the floor of the nursery, bouncing Autumn in her arms.
She'd been up and down. They had chairs for family members to sit in, but she'd been too restless to sit still. Pam had been antsy, too.
Just as Alison was about to lose her mind she saw the doctor approaching.
Wayne stood up to greet her.
"Is she okay?" Alison asked.
"There were complications when she was delivering her placenta. There was a blood clot that created some bleeding issues. We think it was part of her pre-existing problem. But yes, she's okay."
The relief in the room was palpable.
"She's awake, but she's still a little groggy. They're moving her now. We're going to take this little one so she can get as much skin-to-skin contact as possible. And she's going to need to nurse soon."
"We can't go?"
"We just need about ten minutes to get her situated."
Ten minutes felt like an eternity. Alison looked down at the baby. The tiny little squeaking human already had the blonde wrapped around her finger. She didn't want to let her go, but she knew that she needed her mother. She kissed her cheek.
"I'm right behind you, Autumn."
She reluctantly handed her off to the nurse.
As soon as the nurse took her Autumn twisted her arm free from the blanket and started squirming. Her face turned red and she started to cry.
"Hey, you're okay, baby. You're okay," Alison promised, soothing her.
Her crying tapered off, but it didn't stop completely. It was like nails on a chalkboard listening to her screams as they took her away.
All Alison could do was wait. And cry.
o ~ O ~ o
Emily was still groggy, but she heard her daughter crying before they brought her in the room. It woke her up immediately.
The nurse walked in cooing quietly to the little girl, trying to settle her down. But it was only when she was in Emily's arms…against her flesh…that she stopped crying.
The newborn looked up at her mom inquisitively, as if to say, "I know you."
Holding her was emotional. Having such a large piece of her heart and soul packed into such a tiny little body was strange to her.
Emily stared at her in awe, still comprehending how she was hers. Autumn stared back, making gurgling noises. She smacked her lips together and let out soft pitched grunts as she moved around.
They spoke without words. Mother and daughter.
Emily caressed her soft chubby cheek with her knuckle, brushing her skin gently.
"Welcome to the world, Autumn," she said quietly.
Autumn perked up, responding to the sound of her voice. She looked at her mom harder. It was like she was trying to see through a ray of light. Her eyes widened and she mashed her lips together, a smile spreading across her face.
"I love you so much." More than words could say.
She held her close, playing with her fingers, touching her head, tracing her little mouth.
Alison walked in a few minutes later.
The room was quiet and subdued compared to what it had been like an hour beforehand.
Emily was sitting up in bed softly talking to her daughter, who was wrapped snugly in a blanket and responding to her mom with quiet grunts and soft sniffling noises.
Emily looked up when she heard her footsteps.
"Hey," she said.
"How are you?" Alison walked next to the bed.
"I'm okay." She yawned. "I feel like I could sleep for like twenty years." She looked down at Autumn. "But I don't want to miss one minute."
"I know how you feel." She touched Emily's hand. "You were a total rockstar today, Em. Really. I don't know how you did it."
"I don't know how I did it either." She had no idea how women went through that, how she had gone through it. "I didn't know it was possible to love anyone this much."
She traced her index finger against her baby's jaw, moving down until her fingertip was against Autumn's fingers.
Alison leaned forward, pushing her forehead against Emily's. After a few seconds she kissed the very spot where their foreheads had met, one hand on Emily's cheek and the other on Autumn's belly.
They were both helplessly in love with the little girl.
"She's so tiny." Alison sighed.
"She didn't feel tiny." Emily laughed, cringing when she felt the post-partum tension. "They want to keep us for a few days because of the clot."
"But it's been taken care of, right?" She couldn't handle any more surprises.
"It's just a precaution. I'm fine." Emily assured her. She lowered her head and looked down at Autumn, making the same promise, "Your mommy is fine."
They heard more footsteps approaching.
Moments later Emily's parents were in the room. Her mother rushed to her daughter's side, and the tears started to flow again. There was an unspoken exchange between the two of them. There was something special about seeing three generations of Fields women together. Alison took a picture of the three of them.
Emily's parents cooed over their granddaughter. It made Emily feel good to see her mom and dad actively involved. She knew they were going to love her child, but she didn't know how much they cared until she saw them with her.
After everyone had a chance to hold her the nurse mentioned that Emily needed to try to feed her. Her parents left to give her space, but Alison wanted to stay.
She watched as Emily tried to breastfeed for the first time.
It took a few tries, but the infant finally latched on.
There was something comforting and beautiful about the way her body was producing exactly the right nutrients the baby needed, and the way that Autumn knew what she needed to do. Natural instincts were incredible.
After she was done nursing they took turns holding her. Alison sat on the edge of Emily's bed, legs curled up underneath her, pushing as close as she could get to Emily, who had Autumn in her arms. They quietly admired the little girl in all her glory.
For the next 24 hours all they did was rotate holding her, taking turns cuddling with her. They video chatted with Hanna and the girls, who were almost back from Virginia after visiting DC with Spencer. Emily video chatted with Isaac, too. She had no shortage of abundance of people checking in on her.
Hanna dropped by when she got back into town that night. She was eager to meet Autumn. The other girls were going to stagger their visits so they wouldn't overwhelm Emily and the baby.
Hanna came bearing gifts. The girls had put together a 'Hospital Survival Kit'. It had lip balm, snacks, lotion, baby wipes, diapers, and nursing pads.
Emily was sitting in her bed holding the baby when she got there.
Hanna put the gift basket down and approached them.
"Oh my God. She's even cuter in person!" Hanna squealed softly. "Can I hold her?"
Emily carefully passed her daughter over to her friend.
"Careful. You have to support her head." Alison hovered over them protectively.
"I know. I babysit all the time." Hanna smiled down and cooed at Autumn. "Babies love me."
Autumn made a face at Hanna. She looked less than impressed. Alison thought her indifference was hilarious. She'd seen Autumn smile a few times, or at least what she considered smiles…though the nurses told them it was just gas. Alison was convinced she was smiling, because every time she was smiling she was looking at her mom.
Autumn yawned.
"Aww, I want one." Hanna played with her fingers.
"No. Use me as a cautionary tale. Wait a while. Trust me." Emily laughed.
"Guess I'll just have to borrow yours from time to time." Hanna smiled.
"Free babysitting. Sold." Emily nodded.
Hanna chuckled, looking over at her friend.
"How are you doing?"
"Good. They're going to keep me one more day. They've got me on antibiotics for an infection. My water took too long to break. That and the clot caused some issues." Emily put her palms flat against her bed and scooched backwards.
Autumn made a noise that Alison had dubbed "Autumn's song". It was between a sigh and a coo with a hint of a grumble.
"God, she's so damn adorable, Em. How can you stand it?"
"I can't." Emily smiled. She didn't have words to describe what motherhood felt like. It was just part of her existence. "I haven't been able to stop looking at her."
Hanna fawned over her for nearly half an hour. She was fairly natural with her, even when she started to get fussy. She spoke to her in a soothing voice to calm her down.
"She's precious." Hanna couldn't get over how perfect she was.
"I love her." Alison reached over to touch Autumn's cheek with her fingers.
Autumn turned towards Alison, her mouth opening as she rooted around. It was clear she was looking for something that would feed her.
"I'm guessing that means it's dinner time?" Hanna questioned.
"My boobs are slaves to her little demands." Emily glanced at the time and then looked at Alison. "You could probably stand to grab a bite to eat, too. When's the last time you had anything of sustenance?"
"I had dinner." Alison ducked her head and looked to the side sheepishly.
"You had two peanut butter crackers and a pop-tart from the vending machine." Emily frowned at her. "Go get something with nutritional value."
Alison grumbled something under her breath about the cafeteria food, but relented.
"Do you want anything?" Alison asked.
"I am kind of famished." Emily admitted.
She hadn't eaten nearly enough to sustain feeding herself and her baby.
"One chili-cheese dog and a side of fries coming right up." Alison grinned.
"Weirdest labor craving ever." Emily replied jokingly. She hadn't been serious when she'd requested that when she called Alison to tell her she was in labor, but she was serious about it now.
"I'd go all the way to Cincinnati to get you the best damn chili-cheese dog in the world if you wanted one." Alison smiled.
"You don't have to go that far." Emily chuckled.
"I'll see what I can find." Alison grabbed her phone and walked towards the door.
She scrolled through her phone, glancing at the pictures she'd taken of the baby. She was trying to find a good one to send to her brother, who had been asking about Emily. Her parents didn't seem to care, which wasn't surprising.
She climbed on the elevator, her eyes still glued to the screen. She pressed the button for the first floor. The cafeteria was located next to the morgue, which Alison found disgusting and morbid. She had the twisted thought that maybe the bodies were what kept the frozen fish sticks cold. She had been surprised to find out that not all of the food was terrible.
The elevator took forever, stopping at every floor. But the strange part was that no one got on at any of the stops. It was like a child had pressed all the buttons for fun.
The elevator stopped completely one floor above the cafeteria. She waited for the doors to close, but when they didn't she was forced to take the stairs.
The sound of her footsteps echoed loudly around her. It felt eerie. She didn't like it. She picked up her pace.
When she reached the door she breathed a sigh of relief.
As she was opening it she heard a noise coming from the side of the stairwell.
Someone was waiting for her.
She felt a painful explosion in the back of her head. She could hear the cracking sound of something hitting her skull.
Her phone bounced off of the floor and slid underneath the door.
Her vision went black as she collapsed on to the hard cement.
o ~ O ~ o
Emily kept glancing at the clock, curious about where Alison had gone. She'd been chatting with Hanna for almost fifteen minutes.
"Looking at the clock doesn't make the time go by any faster." Hanna poked Emily in the arm, teasing her.
She'd been kicked back in the chair next to Emily's bed since Alison had walked out. She was still holding Autumn, who seemed perfectly content in Hanna's arms.
"She's taking a long time." Emily frowned.
All of the paranoia had really done a number on her anxiety. She thought that someone was out to get them every second of the day. She didn't want to become overbearing and overprotective, but it was hard to find a balance between calm and complete terror.
"Be patient. Cincinnati is a long ways away." Hanna gently rocked Autumn. Emily laughed softly. "She really would go to Ohio to get you an overcooked hotdog and melted cheese, wouldn't she?"
"Probably."
"She's super attentive."
"She's barely left my side." Emily nodded.
"She's so different from the Ali of the old days." Hanna had her phone out, taking a picture of Autumn.
"You know not to put that on socials, right?" Emily asked.
They'd been very careful about not putting her child's face all over the internet, not with the stalker in the shadows waiting to strike.
"I have been briefed by my own version of the NSA," Hanna said with a laugh. "Caleb said that even private profiles aren't really private. Trust me, this little angel face isn't going anywhere near my social media until we put whoever is torturing you behind bars…or in the ground." She clenched her jaw angrily, but then relaxed it and looked down at the newborn in her arms. "You didn't hear that."
Autumn squinted her eyes at Hanna and opened her mouth, squirming around. Her mouth formed a tight line and little creases appeared in her forehead.
Hanna snapped a picture. As she was observing it her phone beeped at her. She glanced at Emily.
"That's Mona. She's at a boutique in town. She wants to know if I can come pick her up. She wants to meet Autumn." She peered at an image of a vintage baby rattle that Mona had sent. "I think she has a little gift for her."
"Yeah, it's fine if she wants to come by." Emily readjusted herself on the bed. "I've got to feed her. You might not want to be here for the boobage."
"As many times as I've changed your outfits I'm immune to seeing your tits." Hanna put her phone away.
Emily snorted out a laugh.
"It's not that. It's just that she latches better when it's just the two of us."
"Far be it from me to keep the little princess from her feast." Hanna flipped her hair with a dramatic smile. "I'll text you before we barge in on you. I'm all for 'free the ta-tas' but I totally get that you need your privacy, too."
She told Autumn that her 'Auntie Hanna' would be back soon and then strode out of the room.
It was quiet after Hanna left. Emily used the time to bond with her daughter while she was breastfeeding. It was taking some getting used to, but the lactating specialist told her that every new mother took time to find the most comfortable way to breastfeed. Emily found that it helped to watch her.
The infant nuzzled against her and kneaded her tiny fingers against her skin. Emily watched her as she slowly started to doze off.
When she stopped nursing Emily gently pulled her away from her chest and moved her into the bassinet next to her bed.
She watched her lips twitch and her eyes flutter as she dreamed of whatever babies dreamed about. Probably boobs and soft fuzzy blankets.
Emily relaxed against the bed, feeling herself drifting off. Her medications made her drowsy.
She kept her hand in the bassinet, stroking her daughter's cheek as she fell into a dreamlike state.
She dozed off for a little bit.
She wasn't sure how long she was out, but she was startled awake by a shuffling noise at the door.
The first thing she did was look down. Autumn was still sleeping soundly in her bassinet.
When she looked up she saw a familiar face that she hadn't seen in a long time. She hadn't been expecting him.
"Knock, knock." He smiled. He had a gift basket in his hands.
"Nick?"
He looked so different than he had in San Antonio. He'd lopped his shaggy hair off and traded his rugged biker boy look for a clean-shaven frat boy cut. With all of his hair out of his face she could actually see his eyes. He'd traded his ratty worn clothes for designer doucheboy threads. He almost looked like a nerd.
He was standing awkwardly in the doorway dancing on his feet, deciding whether or not to come in.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up."
"I…" It was strange to see him. She hadn't seen him since she left Texas. It felt out of place for him to be standing in her hospital room. "What are you doing here?"
It came out more defensive than she meant for it to. She had her guard up for a lot of reasons. She knew someone was still out to get her. But she felt crazy. She was being ridiculous in thinking that Nick would hurt her.
It was Nick. The same Nick who had protected her and Maya at the frat party. The same Nick who used to bring her chicken soup when she was sick. The same Nick who wanted nothing more than peace between her and Courtney, because he liked hanging out with her.
The person after her had a score to settle. The only person who fit that bill was Courtney.
But something still didn't add up. Her brain kept trying to connect something, but she was too fatigued to figure it out.
"I was in the area." Nick gave her a wistful smile. "And I may or may not have been threatened with bodily harm if I didn't check in on you." He laughed. "I'm Isaac's proxy. He can be a scary dude when he wants to be." He took a step into the room, but paused, waiting for an invite. "He sent me as his errand boy. He was worried."
Emily cracked a smile. She could see Isaac on the phone demanding that Nick go to a baby store and put together a flowery gift-basket. His frat brothers probably made fun of him.
"You clean up nice, Maxwell." She called him by his last name, because she knew he hated it.
He grinned at her as he put the gift basket down.
"It's good to see you, too." He walked over towards the side of her bed. "Where's the kid?"
Emily motioned towards the bassinet, where Autumn was still sleeping. She was snoring softly.
He craned his neck over the sleeping baby. It took a minute for it to sink in.
"Holy shit, Fields. You're a mom." He chuckled. "Wow."
"I know."
"She's so little." He stared at her, knitting his brows together. "Kind of has Isaac's frown." He admired the little girl. "You talked to him?"
"Um…" She had lost track of time. "Last night. We've texted a little today."
"Same here. He's been on my case since I'm close to your neck of the woods."
"How is NYU?"
"Not bad." He smiled. "Beats the slums of my deadbeat parents' house. Still smells like beer though."
They laughed. Emily couldn't get over how different he looked. She was used to seeing him in jeans with holes, a leather jacket, and a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Usually he had Courtney on his arm.
The thought of her made her feel like gagging. The girl was still in the wind somewhere.
She cleared her throat and looked down at her hands and played with her fingers before looking at Nick again.
"Have you talked to Courtney lately?"
"Not recently. Why?" he asked.
"Just curious. Isaac says she's missing. I would have thought she'd come running to you."
Nick sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He sucked in a breath through his teeth.
"We've been kind of on the outs lately. Things with her were just too complicated, you know? We want different things."
"Since when?" She thought he'd always be tied to her.
"Since Valentine's Day when she pulled that shit with you and Isaac…when I found out about this little one." He kept his voice quiet so he wouldn't wake her. "Man, this is so crazy. I can't believe you have a daughter."
"I'm still trying to process." Emily admitted.
"You've probably got a lot going on up there in your head, don'tcha? You always were a thinker."
"Yeah, it's exhausting." She yawned.
"Guess I've got the worst timing ever. You should really get some rest. I can come back later." He offered.
But Emily insisted on letting him stick around for a little while.
"You came all the way from New York," Emily said.
"I was on my way to Cape May. Got some buddies I'm meeting up with for some summer shenanigans."
"Oh, so I wasn't the main attraction?" Emily asked jokingly.
"You and I both know that it's the pit stops to the main attraction that are the best. Took enough rides to know that."
"That's true." Emily nodded. "I seem to recall you getting beat up by a goose once. That was my favorite pit stop ever."
"Fuckin' demon bird." Nick shook his head in embarrassment.
He stayed for a few more minutes to visit with her, but he could tell that she was tired. Emily could see that he felt awkward.
He told her he'd be back to visit her soon and then said his goodbyes.
She didn't realize how soon he meant.
As they were talking she hadn't looked down once. If she had she would have seen the red paint on his shoes.
If Alison had walked in on them she might have had a spark of recognition on her face.
The boy at the bar.
The boy who drugged Maya St. Germain.
The boy who ran Caleb Rivers off the road.
The white whale that Alison had been chasing. Or as she had once called him, "a basic white guy."
The only reason she hadn't recognized him in Emily's photos was because of his drastic change in appearance.
He'd taken precautions, making sure that he didn't cross paths with the blonde.
He'd finally dealt with her.
She hadn't known what hit her in that stairwell.
Initially, getting into the hospital had been a challenge, but he liked challenges. He had to mimic a security badge, something he'd successfully done when the young nurse who took care of Emily bumped into him in the waiting room.
He'd been roaming, waiting for his moment. Alison was always with Emily and the baby, and when she wasn't with her, her parents were with her.
He'd studied Alison's patterns. He'd learned when she was going to take a break. He'd hacked into the elevator's override system and waited for Alison to take the stairs.
She'd never seen him coming.
She was where she belonged now.
In the morgue.
Emily and her child were next.
Emily Fields had destroyed everything he held dear. First back in San Antonio. Then after he found his brother in Rosewood. She'd been the cause of him losing his child. And she'd been the cause of losing his brother. She'd taken his family from him.
Emily Fields was going to pay.
A/N: Plot twist! I hit you with a lot this chapter. Word-nauseum. How are we feeling? Emotionally exhausted after that birth? Elated to meet Autumn Violet Fields? Ready to kill me for the ups and downs of Emily crashing, then Nick showing up and attacking Alison? Hoping that the baby bonding and the Fields family taking Alison in makes up for the torture.
