Some much needed sister time :) Please let me know what you think!


The subsequent hours were excruciating.

Piper was valiantly attempting to keep her eyes open, her head repeatedly bobbing with exhaustion as she sat beside Erin in the waiting room. The little girl kept a tight grip on her sister's hand, acutely aware of just how fast her heart was beating. She could tell that Erin was trying to be brave and to remain calm, but Piper could feel her hand shaking ever so slightly.

She didn't know what was going to happen if Jay died. Piper had been with many families and foster parents, but none of them loved her and cared for her like Jay did. He made her feel safe, just by being in the same room, and somehow, he always knew what she needed.

He also made Erin so happy.

Piper didn't know her sister before Jay, but she could tell just how much Jay's presence loosened her sister. Erin was sillier when she was with Jay too, and her smiles felt more real. She knew that her big sister loved Jay as much as she did, but probably more. And Jay loved Erin.

She didn't want to leave for New York. Piper knew that Jay trusted Erin, and that it would be better for her to grow up with her sister. In her wildest dreams, Piper never imagined that she would have a big sister. She had dreamed of getting adopted by a nice mom and dad, who had a yard and a bed for her to sleep in. She dreamed of getting dinner every night, and always having someone around.

But then Jay found her. And suddenly, Piper realized that she didn't need a mom or a dad, she just needed someone who loved her. She needed someone who always made sure she had something to eat, and made her feel safe. From the moment she met him, she knew that she could trust him, and he'd never let her down.

"Do you want to lie down?" Erin asked gently when Piper's head bobbed again. She stroked her little sister's cheek with the hand she wasn't holding, "You're falling asleep sitting up, Noodle."

Piper shook her head. "I don't want to go to sleep." She glanced over at the double doors that Will had disappeared behind hours ago.

Erin opened her mouth to try to protest, to try to convince her little sister that going to sleep was the best for her, but she stopped. Because if it was Hank in the hospital, she wouldn't be sleeping either. Instead she just ran her thumb over the little girl's hand and gave a nod before leaning back against the wall. It was going to be a long night.

"Coffee?" Hailey extended a cup to Erin, "I um, couldn't remember how you take it, so I made it like Jay takes his." She set another cup for her boss on the seat that Voight had vacated to take a phone call.

Erin's lips quirked upwards. Jay's coffee order was black with sugar on occasion, but he always kept milk in the fridge for her, because he knew she liked it better. "That's perfect," she said, gratefully accepting the cup, not about to say no to coffee, even if it didn't have milk, "I appreciate it."

"I figured you probably shouldn't be drinking coffee, but I thought a hot chocolate might be a better option." Hailey held out a cup to Piper, "Just don't tell Jay I gave you sugar so late."

Piper managed a small smile before turning to Erin to ask for permission. "That smells so good. Go for it, Noodle." Erin gave a thankful smile to the detective, "Thanks Hailey."

"Thank you," Piper whispered, carefully accepting the cup. She held it tightly in her hands, determined not to let it spill.

"Upton," Hailey answered her phone and stood again, "What do you have?"

Erin sighed as she watched the detective walk down the hallway to answer the call. She'd be lying if she said she didn't miss being a detective. The FBI was the big leagues, and she was making a difference, but it wasn't a difference on her streets. Sure, there was the trickle down impact of keeping terrorists off all the streets in America, but they weren't the streets that raised her.

"Erin?" She turned her head to Piper, who was looking at her expectantly. "Do you wanna put some of the hot chocolate in your coffee? 'cause you don't like coffee without milk?"

At that, Erin could have burst into tears. Her little sister was impossibly sweet, and caring, and downright adorable. She was observant and smart and had a funny streak that Erin loved. She loved her sister whole-heartedly, and was completely overwhelmed by how lucky she was to have found her. That Jay found her.

"That would be great," Erin managed after swallowing the lump in her throat, "Thank you." She flashed a small smile, "I can't believe you remembered how I take my coffee."

"Jay taught me how to make it," Piper said seriously, "That's how come he keeps that special milk in the fridge, because you don't like coffee without other stuff."

Tears welled in Erin's eyes before she could stop them. "He's always thinking about stuff like that, huh?"

Piper nodded and extended the hot chocolate for Erin to pour into her coffee. "He remembers everything."


The hot chocolate did the trick. Piper fell asleep on Erin's shoulder in the hospital waiting room, absolutely exhausted by all the anxiety and activity. Hank paced the room on the phone with the rest of the unit, who was working to narrow down the location of Donny, and who had Irving and Marsh in custody.

Erin and Hailey sat in uncomfortable silence, the noise of the crowded hospital fading into the background as both were lost in thought.

Jay's partners, past and present, both perked up when Will Halstead emerged from the double doors once again, looking rather worse for wear.

"How is he?" Erin rushed out, doing her best to keep her voice measured and low considering Piper was asleep on her shoulder.

"He's stable," Will announced, relief evident in his voice, "His uh, left lung partially collapsed, that's what the code was. Got the chest tube in and have been monitoring his vitals. He's not awake yet but we're hoping to know more in the next few hours." Will let out a breath and offered a small smile.

"Can we see him?" Hailey asked quickly, sitting forward on her chair.

Will nodded. "They're moving him out of the ICU now, so once he's settled, you can see him, probably one at a time. The nurses don't like it to get too crowded."

Erin was quiet, silently running her fingertips over Piper's hand, her sleeping sister's presence grounding her. "You should go," she said finally to Hailey, "He's your partner."

Hailey gave a grateful nod and followed Will down the hallway. Erin exhaled heavily. Had Piper not been sleeping beside her, she would have pushed past Will, hospital protocol be damned, just so she could see Jay's chest rising and falling. It had been twelve hours since she last saw him, six since she'd heard he'd been taken to the hospital and three since he coded. She missed him.

Piper startled against her shoulder. "Sorry, Noodle," Erin immediately apologized, "I didn't mean to wake you. We're still in the hospital."

"Jay's not awake yet?" Piper asked sadly, her face falling further when Erin shook her head. "How come he's taking so long?"

Erin swallowed the lump in her throat. "His body needs to rest," she managed, "He's been through a lot."

Piper leaned back against Erin's arm. "The kids at school told me I was cursed," she mumbled, "I think they're right."

Immediately, Erin widened her eyes. "Who told you that?" she asked, with more force than she had intended. She wasn't above marching over to the playground and giving whatever punk had told her sister she was cursed a talking to. Erin gathered herself with an inhale, "You're not cursed."

Piper pulled back to meet Erin's gaze. "Everybody around me always gets hurt," she said finally, "Even though it's not supposed to be my fault, it always feels like it."

Erin sucked in a breath, overwhelmed by the little girl's statement. She'd been in the same position not five years ago in the aftermath of Nadia's death. The people she loved always seemed to suffer. "Piper-" she started, but was cut off by a shake of the child's head.

"It's true," Piper insisted, "Mrs. Adler, she got hurt. And Mr. Montgomery. And if though the Davis's weren't good they still died. A-and you got really hurt and now Jay is in surgery."

"None of those things were your fault," Erin refuted, "Noodle-"

"They happened because of me," she whispered, "Because of me. If it wasn't for me, those things wouldn't have happened. I'm cursed."

Erin shook her head. "I um, I'm going to tell you something, about me, and I just need you to listen for a bit, okay?" Erin took a shaky breath as Piper's curious gaze found hers, "I promised you that I was going to be honest, so that's what I'm going to try to do." She stroked Piper's cheek gently, working up the courage to start.

"I used to think I was cursed too. And honestly, I uh, I still do, sometimes. Growing up with Bunny, I was always getting hurt, or she was getting hurt, or bad things just kept happening, like the lights would go out or we wouldn't have water. And um, I got involved in some bad stuff too. I didn't always make good choices, and people around me would get hurt. Sometimes, even when I tried to make good choices, the people I loved still got hurt."

Erin took another shaky breath, acutely aware of how Piper was hanging onto her every word. "I might have told you about my friend Nadia before but um, a-a few years ago, I met this girl," she swallowed, "uh, Nadia, through some work with Intelligence. She had been in some trouble, and I wanted to help her, because I'd been in trouble before. It took a few tries, but she got better, and she became a really good friend of mine, until she got hurt and killed by a really terrible man."

Piper moved her hand to hold Erin's tightly, remembering that her sister had mentioned the story of her friend before. "I blamed myself," Erin choked out, "I thought that if I had left her alone in the first place, she wouldn't have gotten killed. I thought I was cursed, and that everyone around me would keep getting hurt. I thought it would be better to just be alone forever. I pushed Jay and Hank away, I cut myself off from everyone and I went down a really bad path for a bit. And they were still there to pull me out, but Jay got hurt really badly because I wasn't there for a confrontation we had."

She shuddered at the memory. Seeing Jay bloodied, bruised and barely conscious was forever burned in her brain. "He ended up being okay, thankfully, and um, I got better too. Even out of all that bad stuff, both of us survived. We got better together, and were partners again." She wiped her eyes with the hand that wasn't holding Piper's. "I always thought the bad things were my fault too. I tried to blame every bad thing that happened on me. And some of the choices I made weren't good, I know that, but I also know now that a lot of it wasn't my fault."

Erin paused and locked eyes with her sister. "I'm telling you this because I don't want you to think that because bad things have happened, that it means you're cursed. Because you are not, I promise. You and I, we might have been born into a family that wasn't always good, and been through some tough stuff, but that isn't it for us, okay? It's going to get better, and the reason I know that is because Jay found you."

Tears slipped down her cheeks before she could stop them. "Hank calling me and telling me that Jay found you was the scariest moment of my life, but it was also the best. I-I thought I was going to be alone, but then I met you. And now neither of us have to be alone again. And even after everything, it still led me to you. Because of it, I know that we couldn't be cursed, because with you, and with Jay, I know things are going to be alright."

Erin continued to stroke Piper's cheek as the little girl stared up at her. "What happened to me, or Jay, or anything in your past, is not on you. It isn't your fault, and no matter what, Jay and I, we are going to be there for you. You're not cursed, Noodle. Please don't think that."

Piper released Erin's hand and instead wrapped her tiny arms around her sister's neck, burying her face into her shoulder. Erin held tightly, memorizing what it felt like to have the little girl in her embrace. "It's going to be okay," Erin whispered into her hair, "We're going to be just fine."


"He's uh, still under," Hailey reported after she emerged from the double doors. "Nurse said it was going to be at least a few hours."

Erin nodded, still holding Piper against her chest. The little girl had her head resting on her big sister's shoulder and her breath had thankfully evened out again. After their emotional conversation, Erin had reached a new level of exhaustion. "I don't want to scare her," she whispered, gesturing to the little person in her lap, "She's seen so much and she loves Jay and-"

"He looks okay," Hailey said honestly, "Kind of like he's sleeping. I mean, there are wires and tubes and stuff but-" Her breath hitched and she raked her hand through her hair. "If um, you want to go see him, I can sit with Piper for a bit. Not like I'm going home or anything."

She pressed her nose into Piper's soft hair. As much as she wanted to sit beside Jay, she knew just how much her little sister needed her. "Thanks, Hailey, but I um, I should be with her."

Hailey nodded. "She's a really remarkable kid." She offered a small smile. "And she's been really good for Jay. I haven't seen him so happy before."

Erin swallowed. "He um, he told me a little bit, about how bad it was. After I left." She drew in a shaky breath, "I'm really glad he had you."

Hailey nodded again. "He's a really great guy. An even better detective, and even better partner." She rubbed her eyes tiredly, "Piper made him happy but since you've been back, he's been the happiest I've ever seen him. I mean, with you and Piper he's like…" she trailed off and met Erin's gaze. She'd truly never seen her partner so at peace and so in his element. Being a dad suited him. "He really, really loves you guys."

She managed a watery smile. "It's probably the happiest I've been too." Erin let out a sigh. "We've talked a lot, about what happened with us before, and everything there. I-I don't blame you for hating my guts after what I did to him and-"

"I don't blame you," Hailey interjected quickly, "I mean, it sucked for both of you." She offered another small smile. "I worked with both you guys before you left and uh, it was really obvious you were both in hell. Jay went through a ton of shit after you moved but I can tell that you did too."

Erin was quiet for a few moments. "We just had really crappy timing. Always have, I guess."

"He never stopped loving you," Hailey informed her gently, "Even with all the crappy timing and the stuff he was going through. I mean, I'm his partner now but you'll always be his partner in his mind."

At that, Erin let a tear slip down her cheek. "He is a really good one."

"Yeah. I mean, he pulled me out of a ton of shit as well. Always had my back no matter what. I um, I just wish I had his better, otherwise he wouldn't be laying in a hospital bed right now." Hailey swallowed, "I shouldn't have-"

"It wasn't your fault," Erin interjected quickly, "Could have been either of us. I um, I like to think that if it had been me it wouldn't have happened, but I know that's not true. The job, it's dangerous and unpredictable, but I know you have his back. You've been here all night and you've looked out for him this past year."

Hailey let out a breath. "Can't help but blame myself. I told Piper I'd keep him safe and-"

"I didn't mean to get mad at you," Piper mumbled, having apparently woken up at some point during the conversation. She turned her head to meet Hailey's gaze, still resting against Erin's shoulder, "I-I'm really sorry."

The detective shook her head. "No, I'm sorry, Piper. Really."

"You love Jay too," she replied knowingly, "That's how come you feel bad. I-I thought it was my fault too."

"It's not anybody's fault except for the guy who hurt him," Erin assured her little sister. She was forever impressed with how mature Piper could be. "But Jay's going to be alright. He's got a lot of people who love him and who are looking out for him."

"Are you gonna go see him?" Piper asked Erin, tilting her head slightly. "Maybe he will wake up for you, 'cause he always does when you call."

A small smile played on her lips. "I didn't want you to wake up and for me to not be there."

"You said you were always gonna come back, right?" Piper asked, holding tighter to her sister when she nodded, "I won't be worried."

Erin kissed the top of Piper's head. "You are so brave," she praised, "I'm so proud of you, Noodle. What if I go check on Jay, and then I could come back out and get you so you can see him too? Are you alright to stay with Hailey for a bit?"

Piper nodded, taking in just how exhausted the two women beside her appeared. "Hailey, maybe we could go get more coffee for you and Erin?"

"That sounds like a plan," Hailey replied, extending a hand to the little girl, "We should probably get you something else to eat too."


Erin stood in front of the hospital room door, working up the courage to enter. She'd seen Jay sleeping a thousand times but she'd never been there to see him in a hospital bed. She hadn't known him the first time he was shot, and after the Keyes incident, she'd been detoxing on the bathroom floor at Hank's house, unable to sit vigil by his side like a good partner should have been able to.

She drew in a breath and quietly opened the door. The measured beeps from the various machines in the room rang in her ears as she stepped in further, eyes trained on her partner.

Jay was laying peacefully in the hospital bed, nasal cannula across his slack features. Hailey was right – he did look like he was just sleeping, save for the IV in his arm and half buttoned hospital gown that loosely covered tape and gauze, clearly where the surgery had taken place.

"He's gonna be alright, Erin," Will said carefully, causing her to jump. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"I-I didn't realize you were in here," she said honestly, shakily brushing the hair off her face, "He's doing better?"

"Stable, which is good," he reported, "Got really lucky. Lung should be fully healed in a week or so. Chest muscles will take longer, but he's not going to be sidelined for long."

Erin let out a breath and nodded, tears filling her eyes as she regarded her partner. "I'm sorry," she choked out, lifting her gaze to meet Will's, "I'm so sorry."

Will wrinkled his brow. "For what?"

"The past year. Everything," she sniffled, "I-I just-"

"Hey, hey." Will stood quickly and put a gentle hand on Erin's shoulder. "Jay's going to be fine. He's strong and unbelievably stubborn."

"I can't lose him again." She hastily wiped away the tears that had trickled down her cheek. "I-I can't."

"You won't," he assured her, offering a small smile. "I know my brother. He's been through a lot, but I can almost guarantee you that you're not getting rid of him that easily. He'd be in New York every weekend if you asked him to be. Hell, he might be there whether you want him there or not. He and Piper are two peas."

Erin managed a snort. "Yeah, they are. He's so good with her."

"Don't worry," Will advised. "I'm going to grab a cup of coffee. You want to sit with him for a bit?"

She nodded and took a tentative seat beside her partner, hands folded tightly in her lap. "You won't hurt him," he said, "I'll be back in a few."

Erin swallowed and unclasped her hands to carefully rest her fingers on Jay's arm. "Hi," she whispered, electricity tingling on her fingertips, "I um, I miss you." Tears filled her eyes for the thousandth time since arriving at the hospital. Her voice cracked. "I miss you all the time. I tried not to, at the beginning, but I did. I missed you, every second of every day. A-and I miss you now. Even though we've been spending time together with Piper I just…I miss you, Jay."

She wiped her eyes again before bringing one hand to his cheek, "And I'm never going to stop missing you but it would make me feel a whole hell of a lot better if you could wake up and tell me something, anything. I need to hear your voice, I-I can't do this without you. Piper, she's amazing and kind and sweet and she's just so worried about you, and I-I can't say anything that's going to comfort her because I am barely keeping it together. I almost lost it on your brother for crying out loud, and we both know how he feels about me."

Erin drew in another breath. "I just miss you so much. I told Piper that your body needs to rest and I get that but please, babe, just open your eyes for me."

She startled slightly when Jay's arm twitched.

"Jay? Can you hear me?" Erin clasped Jay's hand in her own, tears now streaming down her cheeks, "Come on back, babe."

"Babe, huh?" Jay mumbled, cracking open his eyes slightly. He managed a lopsided smile, and Erin erupted in tears again.


Raise your hand if you smiled at the end of this because I know I did writing it!