Announcer: "...And now, a musical interlude."
-X-
[Suggested music sans lyrics: "Turning Japanese" by the Vapors.]
The shot opened on Freakazoid off to the side, like a host for Saturday Night Live introducing a musical guest.
Freakazoid [presenting]: "Ladies and gentlemen, with a little ditty about the ill-fated American version of Godzilla, the -Dere Ones!"
Applause ensued as the spotlight fell on the quartet of girls up on stage, dressed like an 80's New Wave band. Each wore a t-shirt with their respective archetype spelled out: Asuka on lead guitar with 'tsundere', Rei on bass with 'kuudere', Hikari on keytar with 'tsun/dan', and Mayumi on drums with 'dandere'. Asuka sang lead vocals on what turned out to be a parody.
Asuka:
I saw this picture,
and I predict you're
not liking this here
modern version as well.
Ask the director,
'who's the protector?'
Of the original lizard
we love well.
Although he's burning up
and knocking down and
coming up and stepping down...
This isn't Japanese,
this movie isn't Japanese,
It's not from Toho...
It's not Japanese,
it's an Amer-i-can release
starring this yo-yo!
[A photo of Hank Azaria is quickly shown.]
I would beg you please,
Godzilla should be Japanese
if things were equal...
If everybody sees this
movie isn't Japanese,
there'll be no sequel!
[Bridge.]
If they just wanna
have an iguana
whose flaming breath is
like a barbecued cough...
That's my aversion
to this new version
of the New York
Ferris Bueller's Day Off.
They've got him coming in
and chowing down and
looking up and
locking down...
But it's not Japanese,
'Godzilla' isn't Japanese,
He's more Jurassic...
Got 'em on their knees,
but this film isn't Japanese,
he's blocking traffic!
Though there was a tease,
this movie isn't Japanese,
not wholly Asian...
Everyone agrees, this
movie isn't Japanese,
it's more Caucasian...
No grins, no fins,
no dubbed-in voices,
no rub-ber suits,
and where are all
the toy tanks...?
Everyone's a bit actor,
you always glimpse them,
half the people in this film
worked on The Simpsons-
Mr. Burns voice:
Excellent.
Asuka:
But-this-film isn't Japanese.
Godzilla fans, you can't appease,
with an iguana...
Turn 90 degrees, and give us
something Japanese, but you don't wanna...
'Zilla's' Japanese, and if not why'd
you pay the fees to folks at Toho?
Everybody sees Godzilla's only Japanese,
no gecko you'd throw!
This led off into a guitar solo from Asuka that concluded the set, and the girls were met with applause as they took their bows.
-X-
Announcer: "This concludes our musical interlude. We now return to our story."
**Author's Note(s)**
Our musical interlude this time comes from a 2010 broadcast of Svengoolie where the title host showed the oft-maligned 1998 TriStar version of the King of the Monsters, which in turn inspired the much-better animated spin-off TV show Godzilla: The Series. A recurring bit with Svengoolie sees the title host sing a short parody tune inspired by the movie he's showing. (One such example was an Ace of Base spoof when he showed Plan 9 from Outer Space, or a riff on the theme from The Monkees when they played 1972's Night of the Lepus.)
