One for Sorrow
Pairing: McRoll
Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7
Chapter - 46
Pulling up to the side in the truck, Steve could tell it was going to be crowded, all the cars and people around, all wanting to pay their respects to those that sacrificed their lives for this country, and so he knew their stay there would be short.. He never stayed too long at the Arizona memorial at Pearl, it was one place that always got him thinking about his own life as being the third generation in the family to become a part of the Navy. He wanted to be a cop like his Dad when he got older, he never really envisioned himself going into the service but all that changed when his Dad sent him away..
Now he couldn't imagine the Navy not being in his blood and his history.. He wouldn't change it for the world.. It is where he met Catherine.. the one true love of his life, and though he struggled with this sometimes, it helped shape him into the man he was now, and it was partly his work in the Navy that led him back to Hawaii to stay.. Though he wished his Dad was still alive, all this started when Victor Hesse killed his father and he came back to the mainland for the service and to hunt down Victor.
Whatever reasons Governor Jameson had at the time to give him the taskforce, he was grateful for it.. The Navy didn't feel the same after losing Freddie, and though he had to quickly settle in and make new friends, he found three people whom he could find that connection with.. Meeting Danny at his father's house that day was a god send.. From there, he has seen many people come and go from the taskforce, but he still wondered how life might be different if his father had lived.. Would he have gone back to the Navy? Or would he have made an effort to remain here and bond with his Dad?
Those were questions he didn't like thinking about but never the less, he did from time to time.
His life was good here, he had made a home.. a family of his own, and now he had Mary and Joan on the island as well as Catherine.. Maybe this all had to happen for him to get here where he was now, though he still would rather have both his parents around as well.. Nothing would change that..
"Uncle Steve?", Joanie cut through his thoughts and he shook his head, feeling a little discombobulated as they made their way through the crowd to get to the small boat that would take them to the Arizona memorial. He didn't even realise how he got from parking the car to where they were now.. Joanie was on his shoulders and through the crowd he figured that was the only way to keep an eye on where she was.."Yeah sweetheart?", he kept his movements smooth but still moving, his arms wrapped around her little legs, her hands resting on his head for further support..
"How do we get over to there?", she pointed towards where the Arizona was, the memorial her Uncle and her mother pointed out all the time.. She had yet to go over and see it for herself, "See that boat over there", he then pointed in a different direction, and then waited a second before hearing her answer with a yes, "that boat will take us all the way over to the memorial and then take us back when we are ready to leave".
Steve had their tickets ready to go, and two ensure he got on a bit quicker, he also showed his five-o credentials as well.. One of the staff happened to recognise his name as being the same as one of the names on the wall on the memorial.. "There is a Steven McGarrett on the wall.. any relation?", she asked him softly, with a genuine tone. He nodded and smiled softly.. "Yes Ma'am, that is my grandfather, and this one's", he tapped Joan's leg "great grandfather.. I was actually named after him".
It was always with pride he told people he was named after the man that sacrificed his life that day on the Arizona especially knowing what he did now, that his grandfather went above and beyond that day in helping to save other men on the ship.. "I'm sure he would be proud of you both Commander.. I lost my grandfather that day as well on the Arizona, he is still also entombed down there as well".
Her smile was a little wistful, a smile Steve knew all too well.. The one that felt all too real, wishing they had both been able to meet their grandfathers, but proud of the fact that they both had such an amazing legacy.. "That why you work here?", he asked her softly, her nod confirming it.. "My grandmother and mother used to tell me stories about him.. I wanted to join the service myself but I've had too many medical issues myself to qualify, this was my way of keeping close and honouring him".
"I'm sure he would be proud of you", seeing her name tag and reading it, She smiled softly as he continued, "and thank you Amy for taking the time today to be here.. I am sure you would want to be home with your family".. She smiled back, "You are welcome, it's the least I can do.. They should be ready for you now.. and Happy Thanksgiving".
Joan smiled back, "Happy Thanksgiving", she had kept a few more roses from the bunch she left her grandfather and pulled an extra rose out, and leant down to hand it to her.. "I thought maybe you might want to put this near where your Pop's name is on the wall… I'm doing that for mine". Amy took the rose and smiled at the thoughtful little girl.. "Thank you honey, you are a very sweet girl.. I'll let my Poppy know about the little girl who gave me a rose to put near his name".
As they walked off, Steve patted her leg and smiled softly, he was so happy that Joan was growing up to be a thoughtful caring little girl.. It made him so proud of her.. "That was so sweet pumpkin, I bet your Mommy will be so proud to know you gave up a rose for a stranger".
Amy smiled softly as they walked away.. She knew all about Commander McGarrett, he and his taskforce did a wonderful job of keeping the island safe, her grandfather's name was right next to Steven McGarrett's and she always wondered if it was any relation to the Commander McGarrett in the taskforce.. Now she knew..
It was only a short few minutes on the boat and then they were disembarking and getting onto the Arizona memorial. Steve lifted Joan up into his arms and settled her onto his left hip as they walked through to the wall where the names of all the fallen appeared from that day, December 7th 1941..
It was eerily quiet and still, no one talked and even Joan could sense the importance of the moment when Steve stepped up to the wall where he knew his grandfather's name was located, closing his eyes for a moment, his niece still on his hip.. Though he didn't practice his religion a lot, he was a Christian and believed in God, Jesus and heaven and hell.. To be standing right above where his grandfather would have taken his last breaths was always so surreal of a moment..
His grandmother was pregnant with his father when his grandfather was killed on the Arizona and he couldn't imagine what it would have been like for his grandmother to get that news that her husband had perished that day and gone down with the Arizona.. His grandmother died when he was young, she died when he was eight years of age, so he though he never met his grandfather, he cherished the time he spent with his grandmother, both Mary and Steve loved and adored their grandmother.. He always reminded her of her late husband in so many ways even as a small boy..
Putting Joan down onto her feet, he watched as she carefully put the rose with the little ribbon around it's stem that simply said Steven McGarrett, loved and missed by his Ohana on it, and then walked back towards Steve and held her arms up so he could lift her back up.. He coughed a little to clear his throat, trying to get rid of the lump that had lodged it's way there and knelt down with Joan to again leave a penny near the rose..
There were no words this time.. Nothing needed to be said to convey what either of them were thinking or feeling in this moment.. One of the things that he made Mary promise when she first surprised him with Joan was that she would always known where she came from.. That she knew her history, she was adopted yes, however she was still a McGarrett and very much a true and proper McGarrett in her personality and energy. She had her Uncles excitement and his fearlessness, while she had Mary's caring and softer nature as well.
It was why days like this was important, that she knew where her family came from, that her Uncle, grandfather and great-grandfather all served in the military, he had to be honest.. He would love to see her wearing the uniform one day, or one of his own children, but whatever they decided to do with their lives or whoever they choose to be, he would be proud.
When people ask 'do you have kids', to try to prove their point that you don't understand as you aren't a parent yet, he wants to scream at them.. It doesn't matter if he doesn't have kids of his own.. He knows what it is like to be the 'Uncle'.. He is an Uncle to Joan, and also to Grace, Charlie, Sara, Sammie and Will and if the protectiveness and love he feels for all those kids is anywhere close to what he would feel for his own children, then he understands already.
With a soft sigh, he switched Joan to his other side so he could check the time on his watch and saw that it was time to head back.. The Ohana would be nearly finished with the game and it was time to head home so they could have a lovely Thanksgiving with their family.. Today was a day to be grateful after all, and though he was still in the midst of grieving, he was very grateful to have his family always by his side.
Author Notes.
I always feel like I want to start this note of to say thank you to all my readers and followers who continue to read and review, follow, favourite my stories. It really helps me to gain an idea on if my stories are being well received or not and if it weren't for you guys, then I'd probably never continue to write. Writing is a huge passion of mine and I always love getting inspired with stories especially with Hawaii five-o stories. Hawaii five-o has been my passion for a couple of years now and I don't see it slowing down anytime soon even though it's now off the air.. I still watch the show on iTunes regularly as I have purchased every season.
I have taken some time to re-read the last couple of chapters of this story just to make sure I remembered where I was up to and how to create these next two chapter 45 and 46 perfectly. These are longer chapters mainly because I didn't want to just skip over them without getting into some detail of feelings and emotions.. I wanted them to have feeling to them, weight and a meaning to them.. I'm aware that this chapter is based around Thanksgiving 2019 and it is nearly Thanksgiving 2020, but I just can't seem to stop writing on this one.. I am always inspired by this one, as it was a major part of why Steve decided to leave the team for a while to go find himself. I might still do that with this particular story, have him go and do that, but with Catherine there the whole time in this storyline. I have another story dedicated to the ending of the show when Catherine showed up on the plan as well if anyone wants to read that too.
SteveMcGarrettLover:
I couldn't not bring Lori back, I wished she had never left the team, and whilst I never saw the chemistry with her and Steve as lovers because I'm a McRoll girl through and through, I loved their friendship and how despite him not liking how she came onto the team with the Governor forcing her there, he still made the best of it and treated her just as good as the rest of them in the end. Think the guy who plays Lucifer Tom Ellis as her husband.. I just had him in mind when I wrote it, mainly because of the fact that I am into that show as well.. I'm looking forward to continuing this story, I am loving the whole thing as well even as a reader too.
Aloha50:
Thank you for your comments, I am sorry to keep you waiting for a while with this one, but I hope you enjoy these next two chapters. You really do see his softer side come out in these two, I love his softer side as well. Tough men like him always are softies on the inside once you gain their trust and are in their inner circle.
Dimor:
Thank you for your lovely reviews Dimor, I really appreciate them a lot. It makes me feel like I'm doing something right when you say that I have a way of getting into the characters heads and staying true to how they are on screen. I am certainly planning to keep going with this one, sorry it's been a bit of a while since it's been updated but I have been working on these two chapters for days as I wanted to make sure it was all perfect for these scenes.
