Sorry for the delay.
Thank you to Team Harpy.
Chapter 50
I'm standing on the edge of the stage peeking out onto the crowd that's been assembled all weekend. Austin City Limits Festival has been a big deal since 2012 and has featured such artists as The Rolling Stones, The Cure and Radiohead. So this is huge for BAR to have an artist featured on the lineup. Speaking of Jasper, he's on in thirty so I make my way to the trailer BAR is using. I dodge the flurry of activity around me and barge in on Jasper doing runs.
"Will you rest your voice? Soundcheck went great. You're ready."
"How's the crowd?"
"The crowd has been full since this morning and is still full as they await you. Everything we have worked for is finally paying off."
"Let's go. I'm ready."
"We still have a few minutes." I smile softly at him. "It's so great to see someone get to do what they love to do."
"And of course I have to thank you, because I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you."
"Thank you but I can't take all the credit. I mean it is your voice and Alice and Rose did help some. Where is Alice?"
"She said she'd be right back. And Rose was on her way as well. Something about an instrument kit. I can't believe this is real."
"I know what you mean but this is as real as it's gonna get. You are gonna blow them away."
"They are here to hear me sing." He says in awe. "Am I lucky or what?"
"Yeah."
"I mean I have Alice and she means so much to me. It's like any heartache I had in my past is gone."
"That is so great for you. Meanwhile my past keeps haunting me." I give a stilted laugh then turn to gab a Coke out of the mini fridge.
"Did Edward call?"
"No worse, he showed up." I play with the tab on my drink before opening it and taking a gulp.
"Here in Texas?"
I swallow.
"In the flesh." I pause. "Oh, so in the flesh..." I mutter.
"So why are you sad?"
"Cause I sent him home." I smile sadly at him.
"Why?"
"I don't know. But I wish I hadn't."
"Hey babe, got your tea," Alice says as she breezes in.
"Thank you." He looks at me. "Bella just told me Edward showed up."
"That's wonderful!" She pauses. "Isn't it?"
"He gave me a big dose of the cutes and I told him to leave and he did and now he's working on me in absentia."
"The iceberg is melting." Jasper sings.
"Oh come on, don't make fun of me. I have every reason to skin him alive. The problem is it's getting harder and harder to hold him off. I think I'm forgiving him and I hate myself for it."
"If you love him, why fight it?" Alice reasons.
"Because I'm not too keen on a repeat performance, which you very well know, Girlfriend." I give her a pointed look. "I mean what if he pulls the same thing again? My heart can not take it."
"It can't take it without him either."
I glare at Jasper. "No, and it's all your fault."
"Who me?"
"Yeah, you."
"What did I do?"
"You planted this thought in my head and I can't seem to forget it. 'Nobody lies for the fun of it'."
"Did I say that? Oh yeah, I did."
"Yes, you did. You said people lie because they're scared. I can't even believe it but I'm beginning to feel sorry for the miserable bum."
"I always thought Edward was scared. He still is, I think."
"I hate that I feel this way but he is getting to me so big time and I can't stop it. So what do I do?"
"Don't make up with him out of pity."
"Hold up. You just told me to forgive him and make up with the guy."
"Only if your forgiveness is genuine, Bella. If it is, go ahead."
"See that's the thing. I mean the whole issue of truth and lies has always been a big sticking point with me and Edward."
"Just think about it."
"Yeah, okay, but meanwhile let's get you to the stage." We walk over to the stage at the same time Rose arrives. She gives the drum kit to the drummer and smiles at me apologetically for being late. I roll my eyes at both of them as we ascend the stage, I give Jasper a little pep talk then send him out to a screaming crowd.
There is no feeling like it. So much energy that's just seeping into me and I can't help but be excited.
Bella, Alice and Rose. BAR. We stand together side stage and wallow in all the wonderment this moment is allowing.
Jasper gives the signal and the guitar starts riffing as they launch into I Like It, I Love It, then Ain't Goin Down, Friends In Low Places, and Cruise.
It's during this song, I spot something truly shocking out of my peripheral. In fact, I have to do a double take as my erstwhile husband wanders to my side. I ignore him but can't help but watch him watch Jasper. He gets closer to the stage and I come up behind him.
"Still here?"
"Yeah."
"Am I delusional or did I ask you to leave?"
"You did and I did leave… almost.." He admits.
"So what happened? You run out of jet fuel?"
"I thought I should see the concert, you know for artistic purposes."
I give him a disbelieving look. "Masen…"
"No really. I have never had the chance to perform in a setting like this and I thought I could pick up some pointers. A singer has to get his inspiration wherever he can get it."
"So did you get inspired?"
He looks at me. "I'm certainly beginning to."
I look away, shyly.
He starts in on Country Girl and Alice and I start dancing, giggling the whole time. I keep glancing at Cullen but look away when he catches me. Such a twisted game of cat and mouse.
Rose joins in with the dancing which makes us laugh more especially with Jasper having the women, and probably some men, eating out of the palm of his hand as he flirts with the crowd. Cullen stands back with a small smile on his face as he watches me.
Jasper starts in on Marry Me. And I start swaying but I sway too hard and bump into Cullen.
"What are you looking at, Cullen?"
"A woman who never ceases to amaze me." He shouts then rolls his eyes as he escorts me a little off the stage. I anxiously look over my shoulder to where Jasper is. "This will only take a minute," he promises.
"I'm really proud of you."
"Really?"
"Look at this. Look at what you've done. Look around you. This is a long way from a hotel bar in Port Angeles. You're incredible."
"I didn't exactly do this all by myself. There's Rose and Alice and Jasper… and you, in a way."
"I don't get any credit for this. It's all you. Yes, contributions were made but you were the one who had the vision."
"Well, it's a visualization thing. I mean I was always like that since I was a little girl. If you can see it, you can have it. It's as simple as that."
"You know I can't tell you how much I envy Jasper right now. I hope he realizes he's owning one of those rare and magic moments in his life. You know where everything comes together. He has his health, his looks, the woman he loves and a talent people can't get enough of. I almost had it all. If only I hadn't been so...um…"
"Stupid." I helpfully reply.
"Yeah. Stupid."
"Look, we have one song left after this and then I have to get my star into a car quickly before he gets mobbed by half the women in Texas."
"Okay, well go. Do your job."
"What are you going to do?
"What you want. Go home."
"Okay, well, see ya," I say lamely.
"See ya." He comes in closer and I erase the space between us by hugging him first. I don't know why. Maybe I'm confused. Maybe I'm grateful he didn't leave right away. Maybe I just love the louse. I pull away all too soon then nod before joining the girls.
"For this last song, I want to dedicate it to the woman of my dreams." Alice squeals to my right. " I also want to thank my friend Masen for all his help with this."
My neck almost comes out of joint when I twist it to look behind me at Cullen. He avoids my gaze this time, instead focusing on Jasper.
A cold beer's got 12 ounces
A good truck's got maybe three hundred thousand
You only get so much until it's gone
Duracells in a Maglite
A needle drop on a 45
Are the kinda things that only last so long
When the new wears off, and they get to getting old
Sooner or later, time's gonna take its toll
They say nothing lasts forever
But they ain't seen us together
Or the way the moonlight dances in your eyes
Just a t-shirt in the kitchen
With no make-up and a million
Other things that I could look at my whole life
A love like that makes a man have second thoughts
Maybe some things last forever after all
FM station on the outskirts
Blue jeans after years of shift work
All fading out like I always knew they would
The strings on this guitar
The first love lost on a young heart
Those things are gonna break after the getting's good
'Cause the new wears off, and they get to getting old
Yeah, sooner or later, time's gonna take its toll
They say nothing lasts forever
But they ain't seen us together
Or the way the moonlight dances in your eyes
Just a t-shirt in the kitchen
With no make-up and a million
Other things that I could look at my whole life
A love like that makes a man have second thoughts
Maybe some things last forever after all
They say nothing lasts forever
But they ain't seen us together
Or the way the moonlight dances in your eyes
And I know there'll be that moment
The good Lord calls one of us home and
One won't have the other by their side
But heaven knows that that won't last too long
Maybe some things last forever after all
After all
God help me and give me strength.
***B***
Rose and Alice overruled me and graciously allowed Cullen to take us home on the Cullen, Inc jet. 'Since it was here and all.'
I can't deny it's comfortable and definitely the way to fly but I can't help but remember the last time I was on this jet. I see the couch where we made love and I remember how happy I was. All the questions I had about how he could afford such a trip on his salary and him making up some lame excuse about a friend, when he was the friend all along. And that island…
I sit next to him and he smiles when he sees me initiating contact for once.
"The island you took me to… the last time we were on here…"
His smile is sad now. "Isle Esme. A gift from my father to my mother."
I nod and stay silent.
"Sorry." He mutters but it's genuine.
"So our first gig is a few days before Christmas. So we need to cram as much rehearsal time as we can around your schedule. So that may mean late nights and I don't want you to miss even one."
"I won't. You schedule and I'll show up."
Again I stay silent because my faith in him is close to nonexistent though I do smile at him. I remove myself from the conversation and sit by Rose for the rest of the flight.
***B***
The next few weeks are busy with all the preparations for the Idle Rich tour. We are starting the 23rd of December then breaking for Christmas before heading back out the 26th and going through to after the new year.
Tonight, we are meeting at Rose's penthouse apartment to tidy up some last-minute details. Unfortunately, I'm a little grumpy. Shocking I know.
"What's up, Bella?" Rose asks after my third monosyllabic response. "I thought this was supposed to be a celebration."
I'm confused. "And I thought this was supposed to be a business meeting?"
"If you want to get technical about it, this is a business meeting. We're celebrating."
"That's right." Alice chimes in. "And we deserve it. We put on an amazing concert in Austin."
"Yeah, but…"
"And I have prepared an amazing meal to the likes of which you've never experienced. So lighten up, Bensonhurst. Know when you're sitting on top of the world. Savor the moment."
I smile and dig in. They chat around me.
"What is wrong with you?"
I make a face.
Rose sighs. "How could I forget even for a little while."
"You and Edward will work things out," Alice assures me.
"I don't think so. I thought so for about half a second but I was delusional."
"You wanna talk about it?"
"No, I need to change the subject before I get really bummed out."
"No, I don't want to change the subject because you're sitting here looking like someone kicked your puppy. Look why don't you take over that Idle Rich gig you added last week? The one in Bellington."
"No, that's Alice's assignment."
"Well, it's yours now."
"I think it's a great idea."
I look at Alice. "Well, I don't."
"Why not?"
"For one thing, it is not fair to you. I promised you an opportunity to prove your savvy and Bellington is it. Besides I am not totally oblivious here. You don't think I don't see this obvious maneuver for what it is. A maneuver to throw me and Cullen together." I accuse.
"That is exactly what BAR needs. If you two can't find some sort of working relationship, we're dead in the water."
"She's right. And as a professional which I know you pride yourself on being, you owe it to yourself to do whatever it takes to get the job done so I don't want to hear…"
"Alright! Alright. But there is one condition. I accept this job but you know that it's not because I think there is any future for Edward and I personally speaking."
"Of course not."
There's a knock on the door and Rose gets up to answer it after giving me a knowing look.
"If that is Cullen at the door, I will have to maim somebody." I threaten.
"It's the wine I ordered. Chill." She pays the delivery man and closes the door. We lay the subject of Cullen to rest, personally anyway, and discuss the tour. I leave with a notebook full of notes and a full stomach. I sleep well knowing it may be the last I get for weeks especially now that I am tagging along. I only hope Cullen is up to the challenge.
There will be a few more steps back but we are almost there. Something has to happen first but I think you'll like it...
Playlist:
I Like It, I Love It- Tim McGraw
Cruise- Florida Georgia Line
Country Girl (Shake it for me)- Luke Bryan
Marry Me- Thomas Rhett
Forever After All- Luke Combs
