Bill Weasley sat at the head of the table, chair faced backwards with his legs slung over either side and his arms folded across the top, a picture of laid back charm. His younger siblings were gathered round like children around a campfire, hanging on every word as he regaled them with a tale of a particularly nasty incident on a Gringotts funded expedition in which he was employed as a curse breaker.

Molly was working away in the kitchen, stopping to add the occasional "Bill! There are children present," every time he strayed into slightly too graphic territory, causing Ginny to stick her tongue out at her mother as soon as she turned her back again.

Arthur was grinning widely as he laid out the table setting. Remus was pleased at the sight. Things had been rather tense between the Weasley's, with regular rows between Molly and the twins. Remus had made the unfortunate mistake of asking after Percy the day after they arrived. It was Ginny who explained the situation to him when Molly left the room crying. It's no wonder everyone was so excited to have the oldest child back home.

Nobody but Sirius even seemed to notice as he entered the room, too wrapped up in Bill's story to care.

Sirius was leaning against the back wall, watching them all from a distance, looking thoroughly entertained. He glanced up as Remus descended the stairs. Sirius' eyes followed him as he approached, leaning against the spot on the wall right next to him.

He leaned in a little closer to Remus, speaking softly. "Arthur said you spoke with Dumbledore," he stated, the demand for an explanation implicit.

"I'll tell you about it later," Remus promised.

Sirius nodded, turning his eyes back to the commotion of the room. "He's not what I was expecting, I'll admit," he said in reference to Bill.

"No, look at his outfit," Remus agreed. "And the piercings. Molly runs a bit conservative, I think. Given the way she sings his praises, I assumed he would be a little more traditional. More like his brother, Percy."

Sirius smirked. "You should have seen the way she came at his hair when he arrived. I bet you he has a tattoo somewhere she can't see."

"Wizard kind or muggle kind?"

"Muggle," he said, tilting his head. "Seems the adventurous type."

"No way. He's still from a wizard family, works in a wizarding industry. Look at his shirt, that's a wizard band. I'll bet for all his adventure, he doesn't know a thing about muggles," said Remus, crossing his arms and surveying the newcomer.

"Didn't stop me," Sirius pointed out.

"Sure, but you had a family worth rebelling against. Really motivated you to go that extra mile," Remus joked. "Plus, you had friends to introduce you to muggle things."

"That's true. Where would I be without Lily showing my how telephones work or you getting me to try cocaine," he teased, making sure to keep his voice low.

"Shut it, posh boy. You'd still think The Broomstick Boys are the height of music if it wasn't for me."

"Bet you ten galleons he's got a muggle tattoo," Sirius wagered, side eyeing Remus.

"You're on."

It was at approximately that moment that Molly's head whipped around in their direction, finally noticing that Sirius was no longer standing alone. She set down her wand that was currently being used to slice tomatoes and wiped her hands on her apron.

"Remus!" she called out, striding towards him, causing the rest of the room to turn their attention to him as well. "Good to see you! Come on," she said, reaching him and grabbing his arm. "Come meet Bill, my eldest, who decided to drop in on us unexpectedly," she said, dragging him to the other end of the room.

Remus glanced back over his shoulder at Sirius helplessly, who watched on with silent amusement.

"Remus, this is Bill," exclaimed Molly excitedly as she parked Remus directly in front of her son.

"Yes, Molly, thank you," said Remus, gently extracting his arm from her grip as the kids all sniggered.

"I'm Bill, in case you missed it," said the young man breezily, holding out his hand.

Remus reached out and shook it. "Remus Lupin," he replied.

Bill gave him a sort of funny look as he released his hand. "Have we met before?" he asked, eyes narrowed.

"I don't think so," Remus replied, confused.

"Maybe it's just because these guys have all sung your praises so much, but I feel like I recognize you," he insisted.

Ron groaned loudly, once again embarrassed by a family member outing him as having said nice things about a teacher, even as Remus felt a soft glow at the affirmation. "Bill, stop being weird," Ron whined. "Lupin's got enough problems already without you being a git the second you meet him."

"Thank you, Ron, that was impressively insulting to everyone involved," said Remus with a polite smile, prompting a laugh from both Bill and Sirius at the same time that Fred whacked Ron on the back of the head.

"Just because you're embarrassed to be alive doesn't mean everyone else has to be," snarked George.

"Can you boys all behave yourselves for once in your lives!" Molly snapped.

The back and forth continued, with all the siblings talking over each other. Remus pretended not to notice Ginny, who had spent the entire conversation very quietly trying to position a piece of chewed up gum so that it would tangle in Ron's hair and using the arguing to her advantage.

Bill glanced up at Remus and gave a small, exasperated sigh that nobody else seemed to notice. Remus smiled.

"Good to be home?" he asked over the noise.

"Bloody wonderful, but ask me again in a week," he deadpanned.

Dinner continued on in much the same fashion, with Sirius asking increasingly unsubtle questions about Bill's fashion and lifestyle choices whenever his parents' attention was directed elsewhere.

"So, Bill, interesting earing. I used to have quite a few myself before they confiscated anything that could remotely be considered a sharp object when I went to prison," he said, and Remus rolled his eyes knowing full well that Sirius was only mentioning Azkaban so Bill would feel obligated to indulge him. "Where did you get that done?"

Bill smiled, completely unphased by the bizarre method of inquiry. "A friend of mine in Egypt did it when we were drinking at her place one night."

"A muggle friend?"

"No, witch."

"Any others?" asked Sirius with a raised brow.

Bill glanced from side to side, making sure nobody was listening to them, then leaned in close to Remus and Sirius. "Not anymore, but there was a month or so about two years ago when I…" and he glanced down at his chest pointedly, then back up with a sly smile. "It was a dare."

Remus had to cover his mouth to silence the sputter as he half inhaled a bit of food, while Sirius looked positively delighted.

He was so relieved to see Sirius in such good spirits. He was coherent. Grounded. Social. Perhaps his midnight binge was really no big deal. Perhaps Remus had nothing to worry about. It was a nice thought, anyway, so he held onto it through the evening.

They didn't manage to find out one way or another about the tattoo. It was difficult to keep his attention for long as his family continued to demand his time, asking endless questions about his travels and his plans now that he was back. He didn't seem to mind the attention. What they did discover was that they both very much enjoyed Bill's company. It would be difficult not to. He was very charismatic. Remus could see why his younger siblings seemed to look up to him so much.

Eventually the evening wore on and everyone began to excuse themselves, heading off to their own rooms. Bill hugged each of his little siblings before they went to bed, promising to see them soon, ignoring when they resisted his affection.

"Arthur and I will be heading to bed. I've been up since six, cleaning all day with only the barest minimum of help," said Molly.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "It would be easier to help if we weren't all being constantly chastised for doing it wrong. You're going to have to have a little trust eventually, Molly."

She narrowed he eyes at Sirius but bit back a retort as Arthur put a hand on her shoulder. Instead, she pulled Bill into an almost smothering hug, which Arthur quickly joined. The two said their goodnights and assured Bill they would be over the next day to help him set up his new flat, no matter how much he insisted he did not want that.

As soon as they were alone, Bill rounded on Remus with a sudden intensity.

"I've figured it out," he declared. "I know how we know each other. I just didn't want to say it in front of mum," he explained.

"What do you mean?" asked Remus, suddenly incredibly nervous about what horrible thing he may have blacked out, trying to do the mental math to determine if it was even remotely possible that him and Bill could have been in the same country at the same time in the few years crossover between him graduating Hogwarts and Remus getting clean. Generally, when people remembered him but he did not remember them, the mystery was best left unsolved.

Sirius was staring at him, equally as confused.

"She gets weird when anyone brings up her brothers," he said sadly. "You were at their funeral. I spoke to you."

Oh. Suddenly it all came flooding back to Remus. The little redheaded boy who looked after his mother while she was overcome with grief. He remembered.

"Gideon and Fabian," said Sirius softly. "That's right. I was there too. We knew them through the Order. They were good men."

"Yeah, they were," agreed Bill solemnly before turning back to Remus. "Man, I really thought you were a proper adult back then, but you must have still been a teenager at the time. I don't know how I feel about that," he said, shaking his head in mild disbelief. "I asked about your scars and instead of telling me to rack off for being a nosy little prick, you told me you got them from fighting dragons," he smiled. "You were nice to me. I thought you were probably the coolest person I'd ever met for a long time, by the way."

Remus felt himself blush as Sirius grinned at him. "Sorry that the truth is so disappointing," he joked.

"Are you fucking kidding?" exclaimed Bill, apparently much more liberal with his language in the absence of his parents. "If you'd told me you were a werewolf working for a secret, underground organization that exists to fight evil forces I think my little kid brain would've exploded. Get a grip, dude," he said indignantly.

"Yeah, dude," echoed Sirius facetiously.

"I suppose when you put it like that..." Remus trailed off with a small smile, hands in his pockets.

"Alright," said Bill standing up. "I have to go hide some things at my flat in preparation for my parents 'help,' so I'll catch you guys later. Great meeting you," he said with a two fingered half salute.

"Wait!" called out Sirius before he could quite make it out of the room, prompting Bill to turn and look at him expectantly. "Do you have any tattoos?"

Bill eyed Sirius up and down. "How much is my mum paying you to ask me this?" he said, only half joking.

"As if," scoffed Sirius.

"What about you?" asked Bill skeptically.

Remus shook his head affectionately at the excitement that passed over Sirius' face as he removed his jacket. It was pretty much permanently cold inside Grimmauld Place, even in the summer, so Sirius' layers kept him quite covered.

When he revealed his arms and loosened his shirt to show his collarbones, Bill looked on admiringly at the relatively extensive collection of tattoos that Sirius had accumulated, both muggle and magical. Remus bit back a joke about how few of them had been acquired while sober.

"Nice," said Bill, nodding his approval. "Alright, only fair, then," he said as he lifted his T-shirt to reveal a passage of script on his ribs. "It's an old Sanskrit spell, protection against curses."

"Does it work?" asked Remus.

"Not at all," he said, lowering his shirt. "Muggle spell, pseudo-magic stuff. Nice sentiment, though," he said with a grin.

"Where'd you get it done?" asked Sirius pointedly.

"A muggle parlor in Pakistan that a friend of mine put me onto."

"Is that so?" said Sirius smugly, side eyeing Remus. "It was good meeting you, Bill. We'll let you get on, then."

When Bill was finally gone, Sirius rounded on Remus with a self-satisfied smirk.

"You can gloat all you want, but I don't have ten galleons," said Remus flatly.

"Moony, I have all the riches of the Noble and Ancient House of Black. I don't need your money," said Sirius mischievously. "Don't think I forgot about that thing with Moody. You tell me the story and all debts are forgiven."

Remus groaned, burying his face his hands. "Fine," he agreed reluctantly. "I need to be at the Ministry by midnight, but we have a little time."

"Great," exclaimed Sirius with a clap of his hands. He stood up, grimacing as he did. "Let's go upstairs. These chairs are killing my back."

"Sure thing, old man," agreed Remus, earning a withering glare from Sirius.

A few minutes later, Sirius was sat on his bed, cross legged. Remus rested wearily on the beanbag at the other side of the room, feeling very much as if he had been transported directly back to the Seventies, tie dye fabric cover and all. Sirius clearly had an agenda when decorating his room as a teenager, but one certainly couldn't accuse him of having taste. It was an absolute mess of aesthetics all chosen to be as obnoxious as possible.

"I still can't believe he had that stupid tattoo," griped Remus.

"I can't believe he only had the one. He's what? Twenty-five? And that's all he's got? Weak," said Sirius dismissively.

Remus laughed. "Almost every single one of yours came about because you were drunk and, for someone so pathologically contrary, remarkably susceptible to peer pressure," he said. "You only kept getting them because James would promise to get one with you and then back out last second! Most of those are just random shit you picked out of the books. And I know for a fact that you cried when you got your first muggle one."

"Okay," said Sirius, holding out his hands defensively. "I still can't believe he told you that. I was drunk! I just wasn't expecting it to hurt, alright. It's a perfectly normal response. And that's not the point. The point is, Bill might be 'cool' or whatever, but he's not-"

"As cool as you?" teased Remus.

"As- fuck off- as worldly as I think he thinks he is," said Sirius pompously.

Remus looked incredulous. "I can't believe it. Pads, he's you! He is another you. The clothes, the hair, using his charisma to soak in the adoration of everyone in the room? He is literally who you would have been if you had a different color palate and good parents," laughed Remus.

Sirius opened his mouth to argue but all that came out was an indignant sputter. "That's- I can't believe- such an unfair comparison! I am much better looking! And with a better fashion sense," he finished petulantly.

Remus looked him up and down, eyeing off the stuffy green waistcoat and ill fitting trousers. Sirius crossed his arms defensively. "This doesn't count. It's all I have in the house."

"I told you, I can bring you more clothes. That's not the point, anyway. Bill is both nicely dressed and undeniably good looking. Your jealousy can't change reality, Pads," Remus teased.

"Oh? So you find him attractive, then? That makes sense, he is your type," he accused.

"Come off it. He's a decade younger than me, first of all. Also, what, precisely, is my type?"

"Charismatic attention seekers with tattoos and long, flowing hair, obviously."

"You make a fair point," said Remus drolly. "Not to mention the youthful glow. I bet his back wasn't aching when he stood up, either."

"Low blow, Moony. Try sticking him in a stone cell for twelve years and see how well he keeps up with skin care and good posture," he huffed.

"Don't worry, Sirius, you're still the prettiest girl at the ball," deadpanned Remus.

"Thank you," he replied haughtily. "Sometimes it's just nice to hear it."

When Sirius glanced back in his direction, they managed to hold eye contact for all of half a second before they both broke, toothy grins and a burst of laughter bubbling to the surface then quickly fading away. As the laughter eased into comfortable silence, Remus felt a warmth creeping into his chest.

It happened slowly, but Sirius really did look healthy now. Clean, well groomed, something closer to the man he used to be. His loose black curls were trimmed downto his shoulders and didn't contain a single strand of grey. His family legacy was hardly enviable, but he'd certainly lucked out in the genetics department. Everything he'd been through and he was still so handsome.

It was only when Sirius looked away, turning to fidget awkwardly with the bed sheets beside him, that Remus realized they'd both been staring for he couldn't say how long. Somewhere in that time, the silence had ceased to be comfortable. Remus cleared his throat and looked away too.

"I know what you're doing," said Sirius abruptly.

"What?" asked Remus a little too quickly.

"You're trying to stall. Run out the clock and distract me so you can leave before paying up," he said playfully. "It's not going to work, Remi. Now, if you don't mind, I've been fucking dying to know what kind of trouble you could have possibly gotten yourself into that would involve Moody. It's been killing me. You can't imagine the scenarios I've been concocting."

"Why don't you tell me?"

"Nice try. Start talking."

He stared at his friend in anticipation. There was no way Sirius was letting him escape it and Remus knew better than to try and fight him on the issue.

"Fine," he sighed, "but I can tell by your face that you think this story is going to be particularly fun, and I'm telling you, you're in for disappointment."

"Whatever. Less preface, more story," said Sirius, waving his hand to indicate Remus get to the point.

"You remember I said I came back to London a while before I moved out to the countryside?" Sirius nodded. "Well, as I said, I was in a bad way for a while there. Lost the job I'd lined up when I moved. Couldn't pay rent. All the… all the usual business you expect from a lycanthrope, generally, let alone a career junkie," he said with a small laugh.

As Remus spoke, he was deceptively casual. Almost flippant. He started to feel a bit like he might be dreaming and tried not to fall too deeply into the familiar numbness. He wrung his hands together, grounding himself in the sensation. It was just a story. No need to get lost in it.

"It was autumn, starting to get cold, so I wasn't exactly keen to sleep rough. I'd been doing better before that. Hadn't had to live that way for a while. I'd just turned thirty, you know. I felt like I should really be past that stage of my life. Just didn't have it in me anymore, but I didn't really have a lot of options. The only people I still knew in the city, or even the country, were people who I really couldn't face at the time."

He paused, taking a moment to gather his thoughts. By the look on Sirius' face, he could tell he was starting to believe him that he wasn't in for a barrel of laughs.

"I know the feeling," said Sirius sympathetically. "This is why when I fled the country I went somewhere warm."

Remus found he felt a more at ease knowing that Sirius understood. Of course he did. He knew what it meant to be desperate better than almost anyone. He knew what it meant to survive at the cost of dignity. He took a slow breath before continuing.

"Yes, well, I knew a muggle man from a few years back who lived in London. He used to come to Amsterdam on business a lot when I was living there in my mid-twenties. I knew he had money to spare so I looked him up. He helped out a little, but not enough to get through more than a couple of nights. When we were talking, though, he mentioned that him and his family were going away for a while. I figured nice, empty townhouse in the middle of the city didn't seem like a bad short-term option."

"What, like housesitting or something?" asked Sirius, confused.

"No. Not like that."

"Oh." A beat. "Oh shit." Sirius shook his head disbelievingly. He almost looked impressed. "You broke in? Who are you?"

"Okay, you spent most of an entire year actively trying to, and succeeding in breaking into Hogwarts, so let's dial down the shock," huffed Remus.

"That's different! I was trying to commit a vengeful murder. It was extreme circumstances. You were just out, like, living your normal life," teased Sirius.

"Who's telling this story, anyway?" bit back Remus, to which Sirius raised his hands in apology and indicated he continue. Remus cleared his throat again, rubbing a little at the back of his neck, "So, apparently something happened, and the family got back from vacation early. Didn't take very well to finding me there. It was a whole thing, but Moody helped sort it all out," he finished quickly, stopping as if the story was concluded.

"He-" Sirius tilted his head, squinting. "Hang on, why would Moody get involved in a muggle break and enter? Even Moody can't just come onto a muggle investigation and 'sort it out.' I worked with the man for years. He would never interfere in non-wizarding business like that, not for anyone."

Remus shifted uncomfortably. "There may have been a little magic involved in the incident."

"Moony, what did you do?"

"It was dark when they came home," said Remus reluctantly. "I was sleeping. Or, passed out might be more accurate. Being in London again was fucking with my head. Panic attacks, that sort of thing," he said waving his hand dismissively. "I was out of it, then suddenly there were these strangers standing over me. Shouting. Someone grabbing me. I just… reacted."

Sirius was perched on the edge of his bed, leaning forward, eyes wide. He let out a low whistle. "What was the damage?" he asked gravely.

"Stunned him. Wasn't until he was down that I realized what was happening. I tried to revive him, but his wife was trying to wrestle the wand out of my hand. The… the kids were hysterical. The whole ordeal was a fucking mess. One of the neighbors must have called emergency. I got hauled into the police station. Next thing I know, Moody is there. I suppose, like he said, he was keeping tabs on people from the old days. He was already retired by then, but instead of getting an active Auror and charges, I got him."

Sirius sat back, a look of awe. "I'm trying to picture his face and I tell you, Moony, I'm coming up blank. What did he even say to you? He must have flipped."

"If you needed a place to stay, lad, you know there are still people around who want to help," Moody said in the best impression of gentleness he could manage.

"He said he took care of anything that could cause trouble with the Ministry but couldn't do much about the police report since he was working in an unofficial capacity. They didn't remember the wand, but they still remembered me being there."

"I know you didn't mean to hurt anyone."

"Thankfully the guy decided to drop the whole thing."

Sirius paused, squinting again. "Why would he do that? You reckon Moody put pressure on him?"

Remus grew even more flushed. He'd gone this far, he figured. How much worse could he really make himself look?

"I think he was scared I would tell his wife that we'd met before. How we knew each other."

A look of comprehension flashed across Sirius' face, followed immediately by what could only be described as disappointment. Remus thought it should have been predictable that out of all the horrible things from that story, this would be the thing that bothers Sirius the most. Not the crime. Not the assault, however accidental it might have been. But this.

"He had kids, Remus. A family."

"You did good work in the old days. You're better than this."

"Do you think I'm proud of this? If they had money, I wasn't asking questions. I never would have said anything to his family. I think he really cared about them, you know. You shouldn't ask about my past if you don't want to know these things. I'm more than happy not to talk about it."

"You're right. Sorry. It's none of my business anyway." Beat. "Was do you mean you 'if they had money'?" he asked as if he only just registered the words.

"I saw the needles, Lupin."

Remus pinched the bridge of his nose, cursing under his breath. He hadn't meant to say that. He was so caught up in the story he didn't even think about it. He never meant to let that slip. His mind sprinted through all the possible ways he could take the words back but there was nothing. Sirius wasn't stupid. There was no way. His eyes were stinging.

Suddenly there were hands on his knees and Sirius' voice right in front of him.

"Breath, Remi. It's alright, just breath."

He wished he'd just let himself dissociate when he felt it coming on earlier. He wished he was anywhere else. He knew what the world thought of people like him. People who lived the way he had lived. Everyone was going to know now. They would never look at him the same way again.

"Hey, I know you think I'm going to freak out or something but I'm not. Listen to me Remus, I'm not. You're alright. Everything's alright."

"You'll kill yourself if you keep this up."

Remus nodded, still pinching his eyes shut. He took deep, slow breaths. It had been a while since he'd had to do this for any reason other than nightmares. Even those came less frequently than they used to. It rarely took this much work to get it under control. He focused on the feel of Sirius' hands, which were now rested on his upper arms. He noted absently that this might be the first time Sirius had touched him since their initial reunion. He used to be so tactile with pretty much everyone, all the time. One more thing that Azkaban seemed to have taken from him.

"I'm fine," said Remus eventually, lowering his hand from his face and cracking his eyes open.

Sirius was kneeling in front on him. He gave Remus a searching look, then nodded, dropping his hands down and moving back, sitting down on the floor.

"Sorry," he said tightly.

"Don't be," said Sirius.

"Everything was just so fucked up back then, I kept losing jobs, I had to do something-"

"You don't need to explain," Sirius assured him gently. "I'll listen if you want to talk, but you don't need to justify yourself to me or anyone. You survived. You shouldn't be ashamed of that."

"You didn't survive the war for this."

"I didn't survive the war at all."

Remus nodded again, swiping under his eyes with his sleeve. He folded his hands in his lap, staring down at them. He and Sirius were both silent. As Remus continued to stare, he began to process the numbers and hands on his watch face.

"Fuck!" he exclaimed, trying to stand up but struggling to unseat himself from the ridiculous beanbag.

"What's wrong?" Sirius asked in alarm, already standing up and reaching a hand down to help Remus.

"I have to go," he explained as he took Sirius' hand and pulled himself up. "I need to be at the Ministry."

"Fuck," Sirius echoed. "Will you be okay?"

"I'll be fine," said Remus, already heading for the door.

"When will you be back?" Sirius called out after him.

Remus turned his head, stopped in the doorway. "I don't know. Soon. I- I have to go now. Soon, I swear," he said with a helpless shrug.

He didn't was barley out the front door before disapparating. Of all the times to spend hours alone and alert with no distractions, an unfinished conversation he never wanted to have dragging heavy in his wake. It was going to be a long night.