p class="MsoNormal""Is she going to be the same ever again?" Thor asked anybody. I watched her sleep even though my back needed attending too. Nobody answered for a few minutes before they started leaving. Against my wishes I left too./p
p class="MsoNormal""She's in agony. It's possible the cognitive retraining you gave her fixed her."/p
p class="MsoNormal""What made her break?" Tony asked./p
p class="MsoNormal""She couldn't handle it. She was handling it until the pain started. It triggered everything for her." Nat stripped off her top and Pepper and Darcy were cleaning her burns and binding them up./p
p class="MsoNormal""You need to get yours looked at."/p
p class="MsoNormal""I heal quicker than mortals." I said. I didn't want them seeing more of my scars. I had more than enough. I didn't want them to see. I didn't need their pity. I had little strength to glamour./p
p class="MsoNormal""Thank you, Loki." Natasha looked at me. "For forcing her to come with us. And protect me."/p
p class="MsoNormal""I am good at forcing people to do things they don't want. She didn't want to come with us because she felt guilty. Establishing her guilt to the pain you were exhibiting forced her to stop hiding and actually get her to do something."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She wasn't herself. We all saw how she was."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She was good at what she did." Tony scoffed. "I think the guilt got to her."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She said we didn't have weaknesses." Clint frowned. "But we know she knows our weaknesses. She knows Jane is Thor's; Pepper is yours; any female is Steve's and Loki's is Enya. She knew our weaknesses. She lied. I think she was struggling to get between the two and the screaming got to her."/p
p class="MsoNormal""No." I said softly. "Natasha screaming her name started it off." I saw it flick momentarily in her eyes, a small flicker that seemed insignificant. I knew the bolt of realisation had started to crumble that fragile wall. "Enya was given to her by Pauline. It means fiery soul. She named Warren for warrior. It was her identity. Her name. Being reminded who her name was started it off. She twitched and she was struggling to concentrate. She couldn't look at us directly. She knew something was wrong, but she wasn't sure."/p
p class="MsoNormal""It all fit when she killed the first guy. She broke down. She couldn't breathe and she was screaming." She pulled on her shirt again. "It was like everything cracked for her. They must have hurt her badly for her to break."/p
p class="MsoNormal""Eight days." Steve said softly. "I worked it out. One hundred and ninety five hours is over eight days."/p
p class="MsoNormal""No breaks. No relief. It must have drove her insane."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She still broke."/p
p class="MsoNormal""No. After that, she should have been lost but she got through it. She didn't break like they wanted her too. And that was how we survived." She glared at Tony. "I think for now, we should rest. Enya may need us tomorrow."/p
p class="MsoNormal""I should take her home." I stood up, back whining in pain. "I should take her home where she is safe."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She needs to be surrounded by people who will ensure she gets back to normal. Her friends will let her stay alone and sulk. She needs to know that she is ok. And we are ok."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She'll feel guilty. She'll try to leave immediately to protect everyone."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She won't go back." Clint said to me. "When everything leaves you, you know what you did but it's like a dream. You aren't sure. You are never sure. She won't go back to before. Her brain will fight it for a long time."/p
p class="MsoNormal"It fell silent between us. "I guess an apology is in order for the pain I caused." It'd feel like I'd been stung by the fuzzy yellow things and swirled lemon juice but I'd do it. For helping me save Enya./p
p class="MsoNormal""Leave it." Thor said cutting into Clint with his mouth open. "We have all seen how things are not always as they seem. Your first reaction was to ensure Natasha was safe. You knew Enya would defend her till her last breath. Because she did Jane."/p
p class="MsoNormal""She doesn't take it lightly." I admitted. Nobody replied to me, and the tiredness that washed over me seemed to wash over others. They each in turn bade goodnight and left. Tony and Natasha being the last to leave, still lingering in quiet voices. I heard their conversation about Enya but not wishing to hear more simply stood and left. I didn't turn any mortal light on, just stripped and sat on the bed next to sleeping Enya. She was dangerous, she was capable of violence I hadn't thought was possible. But I didn't fear her. I looked over her, twisted in the sheet. She had her short hair stuck up at odd angles. Her face was tilted towards me, softly breathing. She had scars running under her jaw to her collarbone. Puckered skin ran across her arms and her knuckles were swollen. She had nicks and cuts covering her upper body. I couldn't fear someone who couldn't handle the violence. She was here, safe and sound. And the thought she wouldn't be when I awoke in the morning, now that was something I feared./p
p class="MsoNormal"She had been hurting. I hadn't stopped it in time for her to remain whole. She had been broken, how I had once been broken. It had taken me years to overcome the strength the captors had over me. Their marks left me at their disposal for years. They had destroyed my soul. But I had built it up and despite how many mistakes I had made, how many lives I had taken, I had fought them each and every way possible. This female mortal, she'd saved me from Thor and his band of misfits. Then when I followed her, saw the way she interacted with the other females, and the things she built to help them from scrap others would kick down a hole, it gave me a hope I hadn't felt./p
p class="MsoNormal"I looked down at her thinking of the night she turned up at my door with a bag full of mortal gifts. I hadn't expected her to be the one knocking on my door as I tried to find reasoning to this whole charade. But there she stood, red hair overwhelming her small body. A smile for me and a bag full of presents. I had opened them each, a strange feeling of happiness overwhelming me. I was given things to make my mortal room look better, colours of browns and red. I had been given a flower, a silly little thing, but the white was precious and the delicacy of this 'orchid' was something I wanted to master. The gifts were silly little trinkets; but I realised that their time and effort, from having nothing into something, was not something to be scorned at. I don't remember receiving gifts from Sif and Thor's oafs of friends. But here was some gifts Enya's friends had given, and one with much thought in. I particularly like a sphere on a stand, it was green and gold, the marbled colours glittering and so tranquil. Whoever gave me that had found something that had brought me calm. And then there was Enya's gift. A knitted blanket of green, black, silver and white. A green orb laid in the centre, with silver intricate patterns surrounding it. They all were attached in swirls and curves of intricate design. White pearls lined the voids and bordered the edge. Green diamond lay between the borders and the black filling all gaps and voids after that. It was soft and it had been made with me in mind. Those two gifts made them all seem much more precious./p
p class="MsoNormal"Enya had put much effort, attention and care into creating that for me. It was soft and the silver intricate design was beautiful. I didn't know what others had seen in her, but I wanted to see the same, so I could care for her more than them. I wanted Enya to mean more to me than she did. I just lacked that spark that others saw in her. Here she was with me, trusting me. I felt uncomfortable, like a balloon had inflated in me. It caused a shortness in my breath for a few moments. I held my hand to my chest and looked back down to her and realised she was emreally here /emwith me. The senseless six had left her here in my care. They kept leaving her in my care. Did they trust me? Did they trust me to put her best interest first? Be emselfless/em?/p
p class="MsoNormal"I felt that shortness again. What if this recent capture changes that? What if she doesn't trust me and they turn again? What if she hadn't broke? And I never found her again? I took some deep breaths and soon the shortness settled but the realisation made me uncomfortable./p
p class="MsoNormal"In an attempt to settle I stroked her hair out smooth, to not be in curly knots. My eyes traced the marks that were visible. span style="mso-spacerun: yes;" /spanIn being captive, seeing the pain they had brought her had brought a fury to my veins I hadn't felt in years. She spoke in that hollowed out voice, resigned and no life left to give I felt fire ignite. I reached for the power, I reached until my mental being was snapping. I needed to wreak damage in a way I hadn't felt able. The bruises they wrecked upon her; split lip fresh within days, cuts to tissue underneath, burns over burns, blisters, every detail was caught to my attention. The slight limp on the left leg; in all brought a raging fire to me. I was one of ice; the flames burned much brighter, more hungry than ice ever demanded. That voice, that empty voice, so unlike my Enya, so unlike that soul that begged for information. It'd haunt my waking moments./p
p class="MsoNormal"span style="mso-spacerun: yes;" /spanI lay down and stayed close, without touching her, desperately wanting to evaluate her body, knowing without my power I could not fix it. I saw more scars on her body as she shifted slightly and forced to let go of some of the anger I fisted tight./p
p class="MsoNormal""Enya, what did they do to you?" I whispered to her as I closed my eyes./p