I am re uploading this chapter basically to let everyone know, with how things went when I first added this chapter I think it's probably best if I end this fic. I haven't fully made my mind up yet but if/when I do decide to delete this and call it a day, I will ,make sure to add a note full of thanks to everyone who has veer left a review on this story.

So, I'll see you on the other side!


Chapter 44

"Coping Mechanisms, 1st Draft & Date Of Birth"

Half way through the summer is always the time where those still in school or the education system begin to feel dread creeping up on them. It's always the same way, the first half of summer vacation you feel freer than a bird. You're able to spread your wings wide and enjoy whatever comes your way or your heart may desire. You stay up late, you spend days with friends embracing the warm glow of the sun which turns even the palest of skins a golden brown as the weeks go on.

The blissfulness of the summer weeks start to turn though, just as the halfway point is reached. This is when parents take their kids for school supplies, while secretly stocking up their own supplies for the inevitable mini celebration they have once their cherished young return to school. It is at this halfway marker that even the youngest of children will realise their warm nights, careless antics and worry free days are numbered. Soon enough, Monday morning blues, Wednesday hump days and the relief of waking up to realise it's a Saturday come back into circulation.

With it being the first summer for Shelby and her girls together, the mother had done her best to pack as many memories and experiences into the days as possible. They'd started off with full weekends at Dolly's, Grant and Lucas visiting also but not staying over.

After some unavoidable questions from his mother, Grant had even admitted to Dolly, Shelby and the girls that his marriage to Sharon was over for good. It hadn't been an easy conversation for the gentle giant and he did his best to keep the details mainly vague. The only thing that any of the women in his life cared about though was how he and little Lucas were coping with it all. All his mother, sister and nieces needed to know was Sharon had left Grant, was with someone else and Grant had begun divorce proceedings. It was a very bittersweet end to what at one point had seemed like a fairytale, high school romance.

The fact Sharon had been a serial cheater who had tried to use Lucas as a weapon against Grant, were details that he felt were best left out of the conversation. Of course, April knew everything and without her confidence and support, Grant knew he wouldn't have been coping half as well.

April was still living with Dolly, much less as a live in nurse now though and just a comfortable companion. The petite blonde was helping out Grant as a receptionist for his construction business, now Sharon was out of the picture. The budding relationship between the beautiful southern belle and dedicated builder was still far too new for both of them for it to be out in the open. It was very much heading in the right direction though, the butterflies Grant could induce on April just from a smile never failing to make the short firecracker blush.

There was always an extra person with Shelby and her girls throughout these summer days however, Santana. Her parents both worked long hours and not wanting the Latina to be left to her own devices, Shelby was only too happy to invite her eldest daughter's best friend to join them. As the weeks went on though, Santana's visits became much more permanent and it was actually the rarity when the raven haired teen wasn't at the Corcoran home. She slept over almost every night and only went back home when her mother would insist on her daughter attending a Sunday morning church sermon or Santana needed to gather more supplies such as clothes.

Although, inheriting a third teenager throughout the summer hadn't been on Shelby's to do list she had to admit she had no problem with it. Santana was a sweet girl, full of spunk but somehow managed to control Lexi in a way vent e mother couldn't quite manage. Santana was treated no differently than either Rachel of Lexi however, she was given chores around the house and expected to follow Shelby rules to the letter.

For Santana getting to spend so much time with the extended Corcoran family was bliss. Not only did it mean herself and Lexi hardly ever had to be separated but for the Latina she got to experience what a real family built on love and respect truly entailed. At times, even just in the first half of the summer the raven haired beauty realised just how much her own home life lacked. It was a revelation which hurt to admit but couldn't be ignored. It left Santana even more thankful for the fact she had been so easily and completely welcomed into this family.

The weekends at Dolly's normally meant, meals that would leave you needing a nap in the afternoon. Home movies almost continuously running on the TV screen in the living room. Lexi, Rachel ad Santana camping out downstairs like some kind of sixth grade slumber party. Dolly teaching each teenager their own specialist dish, for Santana a breakfast fit for kings and queens, with everything from hash browns, French toast, biscuits, scrambled eggs, sausages with a split down the middle to make sure they cook evenly, bacon topped pancakes and complete it a secret recipe maple syrup which could both cause fillings and heal the sick at the same time. For Rachel, the most succulent, pulled pork recipe that if you took a video of it could be considered food porn. For Lexi the perfect, fluffy, moist sponge cake as taught to the Corcoran matriarch from her own mother, shortly before she died.

Above everything else though perhaps the moments which would stick with everyone the most were the all night card games. Pyjamas were the required dress wear, with optional blankets draped around shoulders as the hours seeped into the early morning hours. Bets of pretzels and matchsticks in place of money, collecting large piles in the middle of the round, huddled around kitchen table. For the adults, each game required a beverage to help with concentration, a fact the teens and April would use to their advantage as the games carried on longer into the evening.

Even though purely just for fun, no one took the games half heartedly. Narrowed eyes, steely poker faces and telling twitches were always prominent but so too was the almost continuous laughter. The inability for someone to bite back their squeak from a joke or fumble of a hand. Playful shoves at a loss, speeches of revenge and even the occasional 'I.O.U Twenty matchsticks' scratched onto a piece of paper were thrown about. As the nightly games quickly became a favourite, new family tradition it soon became apparent above all else that Rachel had been a card shark in a previous life.

In between the long weekends at G-mama's house, Shelby and the girls spent their time going to the movies, dinners out, hell even bowling a few times. It had never been one of Shelby's favourite pass times but she had to admit doing it with her girls had changed her mind.

Not unlike the card games, the outcome of each game of bowling was highly contested and could even result in some sulking, silent rides back home. The girls could be even worse. When Santana was with them, which was every time apart from one, it meant they could team up. The thought was this would somehow ease the competitive nature of the 'Corcoran' blood line but apparently adding a Latina to the mix only made things worse.

Still though, the little moments like, Rachel insisting the only reason she hadn't been able to make her final shot was due to her ill fitting shoes, Santana nearly taking out a small child with one of her more wild wind ups or Lexi somehow making a seven-ten split while consuming the last bite of her hot dog made bowling one of the choir coaches new favourite activities.

It was currently a Thursday, which during the summer months really meant nothing more significant than having to put the trash out every other week. It had been a day of lounging around the house, as the day before Shelby had treated the three teens to a shopping trip. Rachel spent the majority of the day searching for the perfect pair of shoes for the first day back at school, only to end up returning to the very first store and first pair of shoes she'd tried on that day. Needless to say after that everyone was more than happy to just rest.

The summer evening was just starting to dilute the brightness from the sky as it nears, Shelby's youngest daughter's curfew of ten. Unlike her sister, mother and Santana, Rachel had felt more than up to a day full of activity and had been out since nearly half eight with Gemma.

Well, that was at least what the diva in training had led her unsuspecting mother to believe. It was hardly the first time in the first half of summer that the youngest Corcoran had fabricated her true companion in order to spend time with Leroy. Of course it wasn't exactly something that Rachel was proud of but she truly believed it was a necessary evil.

Having made her father drop her off two blocks away, Rachel checks the clock on her phone just before turning the key in the lock of the front door. She was ten minutes early, normally the teenager would give herself a good twenty to thirty minute cushion but tonight had run long.

'You know that was on purpose, Rachel. He is just trying to push the boundaries. You're going to have to truly put your foot down with him.' Rachel mentally comments as with a final breath she allows some of her tension to wash away knowing she could now return back to where she truly wanted to be all along, home.

The fourteen year old was on a mission and although she knew nothing was guaranteed and she very well may be playing into Leroy's clutches, Rachel saw it as a calculated risk she couldn't miss. Lexi was in constant pain and if this was the only hope she had to find out the truth then whatever it may entail, Rachel was going to do it.

"I'm back, mama." Rachel calls out instinctively as she steps foot through the front door. Although the young girl had managed to rationalise her secret meetings with her father in her mind, subconsciously every visit left it's grim affects. Mainly the brunette was just left feeling dirty, sticky to the touch no doubt due to the lies she had to so freely offer her unsuspecting and trusting mother.

"You have fun, baby? Is Gemma not with you again? Rachel, what have I told you about inviting her in?" Shelby's cheerful tone carries from her place curled up into the arm of the sofa. Her reading glasses were perched on the end of her nose as she strains around the corner to get a glimpse of her youngest.

If there was one thing these past weeks had taught Rachel, it was how to truly think on her feet. Well, at least lie on her feet.

"I always offer her to come in, mama. Besides she had to rush off tonight for getting back for her own curfew seeing as dinner went a little longer than we anticipated." Rachel explains in a cool manner, although even after all these weeks ad lies, the girl's stomach felt hot with burning acid from her deceit dipped words.

Bouncing into the living room area, the petite brunette rolls her eyes dramatically as she flops down onto the sofa and stretches out so her head can lay across the older woman's lap. The need for physical contact with Shelby after a longer period of time apart not new but exacerbated due to the heavy heart the fourteen year old was now carrying around.

Shelby of course couldn't be more fine with the need for contact from her daughter and has her arm raised up to accommodate Rachel's upper half even before the teen is fully stretched across the sofa. Leaning down, the choir coaches plump lips place a kiss to the girl's temple before her hand rubs absentmindedly up and down Rachel's side.

"What are you looking at?" Rachel ponders out loud as her chocolate brown orbs focus on the screen of her mother's iPad, which had previously been resting on the older woman's lap, both of her legs stretched out underneath the coffee table.

"Oh, I was just trying to come up with some inspiration for your sister's upcoming birthday. Before you say it, I know it's not until September but I like to be well prepared and let's be honest, Lexi is hardly the easiest person to buy for is she?" Shelby answers, shutting down her youngest daughter's question before it can even form within Rachel's mind let alone leave her lips.

As her mother's words sink in, Rachel shifts herself up a little but only to scoot even closer into Shelby and get a better look at the screen. Thoughts quickly fire off within the girl's mind as her bottom lip pokes out and her puppy dog like eyes narrow slightly.

'My babies are so cute when they're concentrating.' Shelby chuckles inwardly as the expression forming on Rachel's face is almost too much for the mother to handle. The fact she'd just finished her second glass of wine that night possibly contributing to her faltering emotions.

Confusion starts to quickly cloud over the teenager's eyes as the task having been offered to her suddenly seems more difficult than first thought. Rachel's head rests back down, slowly in defeat against Shelby's thighs as her shoulders rise up in a shrug like move.

"Well, what exactly did you have in mind? Perhaps we can workshop what you already have?" Rachel suggests, the uncertainty making her voice shake just enough to be obvious for her already knowing mother who has to stop from laughing.

Sympathetically, with a nod of agreement, the older brunette pats Rachel's head and sighs bringing the screen a little closer with her free hand.

"That would be great if I had any real ideas to begin with. At first I thought a new car but Lexi has her one, which for some odd reason she loves and I don't see her as the type to find a new car overly exciting." Shelby reveals, her own body slumping down a little more into the sofa. She'd been researching this for a few weeks now and was still coming up with nothing.

With her eyes on the screen, Rachel feels her cheeks tighten into an awkward smile listening to just what her mom had come up with so far. Her teeth were clenched together so tightly they make a whistling noise as she breathes in. The teenager was cringing to the highest degree without full blown recoiling into a ball.

"Well, you are right about Lexi not being the type of person to find a new car an amazing gift. Not that she wouldn't appreciate it, I am sure she would. I just feel that, with Lexi something more… thoughtful and personal would mean more." Rachel tentatively agrees, cautious as the last thing she wanted to do was hurt her mom's feelings.

Now it was the mother's turn to cringe, only she was cringing because she knew all too well Rachel was correct. Hanging her head back with a heavy sigh, Shelby pulls her glasses from her face and pinches the bridge of her nose.

"You're right, you're right. I know you are completely right, god what was I thinking? I just want to do something special for her, you know? I've missed so many birthdays for you both." Shelby's voice begins to crack. How much wine ad she drank again?

Shooting up to a seated position beside the older Corcoran woman, Rachel feels every muscle in her heart ache just hearing the slightest falter within her mother's usually strong vocals. Instantly, tanned hands cup Shelby's suddenly damp cheeks as the teenager of the two brunettes, encourages her mother to look at her.

"Mama, mama no. Listen to me, okay? You missed out on birthdays due to no fault of your own and I feel confident in speaking for both Lexi and myself when I say, these next birthdays for us are going to be special just due to the fact we are going to get to have them with you. You don't need to outdo yourself with extravagant gifts or lavish parties. We have already gotten the best birthday gifts this year, we got you back." Rachel hurriedly explains, her own eyes watering at the sight of such strong emotions seemingly pouring from Shelby's green eyes.

Shelby lifts her head and locks eyes with her youngest, despite the tears still rapidly cascading down her high cheekbones, the mother can't help but beam. Strong arms instinctively wrap around Rachel's small frame and bring her crushing into her, stealing most of the air within her daughter's lungs at the same time.

"How did I get so lucky? I hope you know how much I love you and your sister, how having you both back in my life has been the greatest thing to happen to me short of giving birth to you both in the first place." Shelby counters, her lips pressing sloppy kisses into Rachel's soft hair repeatedly as the fourteen year old struggles to regain a breath where she is being held so tightly.

Realising she was having a bit of a moment, Shelby is quick to loosen her grip and sniffle back the remaining tear still clouding her emerald orbs. Chuckling, the long time choir coach just cups Rachel's cheeks and admires her daughter's beauty.

"Ignore me, I'm just emotional. I made the mistake of opening up that bottle of wine auntie Helena sent me from her trip to Italy. Apparently it is stronger than I am used to or I'm becoming a light weight." The mother continues, her laughter reassuring a still guilt ridden Rachel that she was actually okay.

The fourteen year old nods in agreement, not wanting to leave Shelby yet though, Rachel is quick to snuggle back against her mother's side. Taking the iPad into her possession the younger of the two brunettes just smirks.

"Well, at least we now know you shouldn't be allowed to drink and online shop. You have seventeen pairs of the same boots in your shopping cart. None of them are even n your size either." Rachel declares with slight horror as a buzzed Shelby instantly reaches for the iPad to inspect this information was correct.

'This wouldn't be the first time Helena has gotten me to buy more shoes than I need but this is the first time she's done it without being physically next to me. Wow, that wine really is strong.' Te mother internally comments as she nearly cracks the screen deleting the items.

A warm smile spreads across Rachel's face as the softness of her mother's lightweight, dark grey cardigan brushes against her cheek. The comfort such a feeling provokes in the diva in training, enough to almost lull the fourteen year old to sleep. Instead though she just loops her arm through Shelby's and nuzzles closer into her mother's chest before pointing to the iPad screen once more.

"Come on, let's see what we can find as potential birthday gifts for Lexi together. Also, perhaps you should let me be in charge of adding anything to the shopping cart." Rachel suggests, her final comment a joke but partly serious at the same time.

Shaking her head with a laugh, Shelby decides to let it go because it was both true and deserved. Kissing the top of Rachel's head again she just nods, only too happy to spend some quality time snuggled with her baby.

Just up the stairs of the Corcoran family home, Lexi and Santana were snuggled up together on the slightly taller teens bed. Well, to be exact, the former cheerio was sat with her back against the headboard, propped up by pillows and Lexi was slumped against her front while holding a book she was attempting to read out loud.

Since Santana had made herself an almost permanent member of the household, she'd taken it upon herself to do everything she could to help with Lexi's reading and writing. She knew the subject in general was sensitive for the brunette and it had taken some persuasion but that wasn't a field Santana lacked in. The Latina knew she had to come up with some creative ways to offer her secret girlfriend support and encouragement and although initially met with resistance, Lexi had soon come around to these new, helpful yet unconventional study tips and tricks.

Slender, tanned fingertips graze softly across Lexi's toned abdomen, just underneath the old football jersey, Lexi was wearing as a nightshirt along with a pair of old gym shorts. Santana's nails were just ghosting back and forth, up and down as the sixteen year old in front of her prepared for the next sentence.

"'She's saying it! She's saying it!' cried Jane, holding tight to herself for fear she…w.. would break in two with de… de… light." Lexi reads out each word slowly, stumbling a few times but managing to gather herself each time quickly, to her own relief.

Instantaneously a huge smile of pride pulls against Santana's lips as she leans in, hands now flat against Lexi's stomach tugging the taller sixteen year old back against her front more securely. The slight movement, increase of the pressure against Lexi's body and feel of the raven haired beauty's breath against the shell of her ear earning a moan from a pent up Lexi.

'Oh she is making this next to impossible to continue. How am I supposed to concentrate when I can feel her so close, so warm and soft. Damn it, I liked this more when I just had to read a sentence and that would be enough for a reward. Damn progress.' Lexi's flustered inner voice rants as a knowing Santana allows her lips to feather touch the back of Lexi's neck. Access to the area given by the fact Lexi's hair was in one long side plait.

Gulping down the lump within her throat, the brunette of the two teens wets her lips to refocus before forcing her brown orbs to study the book in front of her.

"And she was saying it. The Bird Woman was there and she was saying it. 'Feed the Birds, Tup-pe…'" Lexi's roll falters as she becomes stuck by one particular word.

Santana could feel the tension rising throughout her girlfriend's body and quickly rests her chin against Lexi's shoulder and examines the word herself. With a quick glance to Lexi's pained expression the Latina leans upwards into the other teen's ear.

"Tuppence. I'm pretty sure it was some kind of money back in the day over there in England." Santana explains softly, for a moment the light brush of her words causing Lexi's eyes to shut.

Nodding in silent thanks for the help, Lexi grips the book a little more securely and refocuses with more determination to finish up this part and then reveal in her reward.

"'Feed the Birds, Tup- Tuppence a bag! Feed the Birds, Tup-Tuppence a Bag! Feed the Birds, Feed the Birds, Tuppence a Bag, Tuppence a Bag!' Over and over again, the same thing, in a high ch-chant… chanting voice that made the words seem like a song." The brunette continues, having to read the word so many times by the end she feels as though she's conquered it which only bolsters her confidence to continue.

Unable to contain herself any longer, Santana moves one of her hands to Lexi's cheek and turns the fellow teen's face towards her. Locking eyes with the slightly taller of the two teenagers, Santana presses her lips against Lexi's and is only all too eager to fully reward her girlfriend.

"You can shut the book now, you won't need it for a while." Santana mutters, her lips barely breaking away enough from Lexi's to actually speak.

It wasn't as though the brunette of the two teenagers needed any encouragement or to be told twice and practically flings her copy of 'Mary Poppins' across the room. Of course, Lexi is far too worried about pressing back into the kiss with her girlfriend to worry about the direction of the projectile. Unfortunately, this is a mistake as suddenly a loud crash echoes throughout the bedroom.

Santana and Lexi pull away and watch with slack jaws as the tall, standing lamp in the corner rocks forward. They hold their breath in unison as the metal lamp shade around the bulb knocks, ever so slightly into one of the pictures on Lexi's shelf which was just above her dresser.

The picture was of Lexi, Rachel, Shelby and Dolly at one of their weekends at the home of the oldest Corcoran woman. The frame topples off of the shelf, to the dresser below where it lands between a few bottles of perfume that spread out like they'd been hit by a bowling ball and they were the pins.

Each bottle shoots off in a different direction and smack into something else before falling to the ground.

One of the items that gets a missile of a perfume bottle sent at it, was Lexi's standing necklace stand which as it was contained an unhealthy amount of heavy chains. They of course topple over from the impact but as was proving to be inevitable, their downfall was instrumental in yet another disaster.

One of the long, silver chains finds its way to wrap around the strap of Santana's purse, which she'd left on the dresser top likely days before. As the weight of the necklaces and holder take force, Santana's overly stuffed bag is drug to the edge of the dresser, in its path collecting a large stack of Lexi's finished and yet to be checked work pages, given to her by Shelby to complete a few days ago.

The papers fly out into the air and quickly spread out like an exploding firework before fluttering down to the wasteland of mess now collected on Lexi's bedroom floor.

It was almost like watching a 'Rube Goldberg' machine, the chain reaction of how the items suddenly trickle down and cause the next into motion, almost hypnotic. The sequence seemingly lasts for a good minute, which doesn't seem all that long but as you're watching your possessions all commit suicide that minute feels so much longer. Finally though the final rattle of noise echoes out and both Santana and Lexi are left completely dumbfounded.

'How did one flick of a book, cause all of that chaos?' Lexi's inner voice ponders with astonishment, the remnants of chaos now lying completely stilled on the floor of her bedroom, apart from a few stray pages of worksheets still trickling down.

"LEXI, SANTANA! What the hell is happening up there?!" Shelby's voice almost instantly rings out from downstairs and the two, still silent teenagers just stare at one another as if somehow that would cause them to come up with an answer.

'Well, that's my summer vacation here over for good the second she sees this mess.' Santana silently realises while staring deeply into Lexi's chocolate brown, frozen wide open eyes.

Lexi's eyes flicker from Santana just long enough to take in the scene now laid out before them. Gulping, the slightly taller of the two teenagers, clears her throat ready to respond.

"NOTHING, SORRY MOM!" Lexi replies with a shaky shout, her eyes urging for Santana to back her up before Shelby took matters into her own hands.

"NOTHING, SORRY MAMA C!" Santana agrees, catching on to the silent plea from her girlfriend with her heart lodged firmly in her throat.

Instantly, each girl begins to hold their breath as they wait to see if Shelby would have any follow up questions or god forbid make her way upstairs to inspect with her own two eyes. At this point, it was in the hands of any god's that may seek pity on them.

"Yeah, well it better be nothing. Don't make me come up there. You are both too old for me to even have to say that phrase." Shelby retorts, frustration evident in her booming voice but also the reluctance to actually go and check what caused the racket.

"SORRY!" Lexi and Santana apologise instantly, in completely unison and synch once again. They each knew to keep listening out though, just encase the mother of two changes her mind and heads up to them anyway.

Santana feels her thudding heart, pulsating from her throat as Lexi's brown eyes close tightly as if this was some kind of defence mechanism if Shelby were to appear and see the utter state of her room.

Everything goes back to silence though and the utterly relieved teens collapse together with prolonged exhales of breath. Santana's back flops against the mattress as Lexi's head buries into the crook of the raven haired beauty's neck and shoulder.

"You really need to work on your aim." Santana comments with a half chuckle as her hand playfully slaps at her girlfriend's shoulder, still slightly attempting to believe their luck.

A frown is quick to form across the former Cheerio's forehead however as she realises Lexi was shuddering uncontrollably against her. It takes a moment of observation for the Latina to realise, Lexi was shuddering because she was laughing so damn hard.

"Your ass better now be laughing right now, Lexi?" Santana snaps, genuinely annoyed at the fact the taller of the two teenagers was finding this all so amusing.

Lexi of course, is too far gone to actually formulate a sentence an instead just buries her mouth against Santana to try and muffle the quickly increasing giggles reverberating from her lungs.

"Lexi, you cannot be serious right now. You're laughing? At what, the fact we very nearly just came close to causing our own deaths? Actually, scratch that I take it back, You nearly caused both of our deaths, I was completely innocent." Santana questions with irritation as Lexi was now fully in hysteric and laid fully against her riving from side to side with muffled cackles escaping her lips.

Shaking her head in disbelief at hat she was witnessing, the raven haired beauty rolls her eyes and shoves at the creased up teenager laying across her to try and dislodge Lexi.

"You're an asshole, do you know that?" Santana hisses as her attempts to shift her girlfriend off of her fail miserably.

Lexi realises she was actually pissing the Latina off and quickly reaches up with her hand to place one finger against Santana's lips. Cautiously and whilst trying to contain her laughter, the brunette looks up into Santana's unpleased looking features.

"San, San, I know… I know I shouldn't find it funny but… but you have to agree, that shit was epic." Lexi counters, barely able to get the words out between the breath stealing cackles still looking for escape.

Dark brown eyes, lock intently with watering lighter chocolate coloured ones. The fact that Lexi's cheeks were now starting to flush and tears were forming was making it near on impossible for the more tanned teenager to remain angry.

A smirk begins to tug at Santana's lips and like a hawk, Lexi picks up on this. Leaning up slightly from her position laid across Santana, the sixteen year old presses her finger into her girlfriend's slightly dimpling cheek.

"See, see you're laughing. You know I'm right." Lexi brags, very pleased with herself for having broken the Latina's resolve.

"You're an asshole." Santana repeats, only this time the smile on her face can't be missed.

'I hate how she is able to break me so damn easily.' Santana comments within the confines of her mind as Lexi half reluctantly nods in agreement of her girlfriend's assessment of her.

"But you love me all the same?" Lexi sheepishly half states and questions as Santana shakes her head with a full laugh in response.

"You know I do but one thing about me you may not know, I am not helping you clean any of this mess up." Santana counters expertly, her words punctuated by a flick of her eyes to the waiting carnage laid out on the floor.

Lexi concedes her defeat with a shrug of her shoulders and half nod of acknowledgement to Santana's winning shot. The brunette, now pushed up in her hands, either side of Santana's hips, leans in and captures the other girl's lips sweetly.

"Touché, I deserve that." Lexi agrees sweetly as her forehead momentarily leans in against Santana's as the sixteen year old overlooks the task she brought on herself all with a flick of a wrist and throw of a book. Just her luck.

Downstairs, Shelby and Rachel were now wrapped up together within the light, soft grey blanket on the cream sofa. The smaller of the two brunettes had her head resting against her mother's chest as Shelby's arm wrapped securely around Rachel's petite frame, drawing her ever closer. The mother and her youngest were still going over potential gift ideas for Lexi's upcoming birthday.

As focused as her mother was, Rachel was equally distracted. Instead of examining the scrolling screen that was gently illuminating Shelby's perfect high cheek boned profile, the fourteen year old was fixated solely on her mom.

'It truly is amazing really. Lexi is always so quick to comment on my similarities to mama but all I see are the features Lexi shares with her. Their strong cheekbones, slightly rounded chin and plump lips, it's incredible.' Rachel's inner voice chimes out as the fourteen year old just admires the familiar features belonging to her mother.

As the teenager's eyes continue to gaze upon her mom, Rachel's attention becomes stolen once more, this time by the small sparkle off of Shelby's necklace. Due to Rachel's resting position against her mother's chest, it was right in front of her nose.

Slowly the sound of Shelby's thumb flicking across the iPad screen, still engrossed in her search, enters Rachel's consciousness once again. Delicately, the small brunette reaches her hand out to Shelby's necklace pendant and rolls it between her index finger and thumb as brown orbs examine it.

A simple, tear drop shaped diamond. No bigger than Rachel's pinkie finger nail, hanging off a delicate silver chain which was long enough to ensure the pendant hung just above the choir coach's heart. Shelby didn't wear it constantly, at least not normally. Since summer had started though, Rachel's hawk like eyes had noticed it more frequently however.

Shelby's eyes, sitting behind her reading glasses, drift down as Rachel becomes transfixed by her necklace. It was a simple thing that children often do but for the older Corcoran woman, it was little moments like this that truly reminded her she was now fully a mother to her babies.

"Hey, I thought you were supposed to be helping me?" Shelby chuckles with a gentle shake of her head as Rachel's tanned forehead delicately crumples into a frown of concentration.

"What about jewellery? Lexi adores her locket and we know why but that doesn't mean that you can't perhaps get a new one. Lexi can still put the picture of her baby inside but then the actual locket will be even more precious because it will be from you?" Rachel suggests, her voice warm as the idea clearly formulates as she speaks.

Gazing up into Shelby's eyes, Rachel obviously hadn't heard her mom's playful jab and just waits excitedly for her mother's reaction to the idea she'd just come up with.

It takes a few beats for Shelby's slightly buzzed brain to process her daughter's suggestion fully but when it clicks a bright smile instantly spreads across the taller brunette's face. The mother's strong hand grips Rachel's shoulder tightly and tugs the petite singer that much closer against her side in an excited squeeze.

"I love that idea, it's perfect. You are truly a genius." Shelby excitedly answers, plump lips leaving a spattering of kisses on her daughter's head as Rachel beams with pride that she'd come up with a winning idea.

'It really shouldn't make me feel quite as giddy as it does when, mama praises me but it does. Oh' Gold Stars' am I blushing right now like a toddler?' Rachel inwardly questions with a deep groan, embarrassed to a certain degree. Still though, the fact she'd been able to make her mom happy was the main emotion coursing through the fourteen year old.

Quickly, Shelby almost has Rachel in a choke hold, as she brings her other had to the iPad in order to frantically type in her new search. The smile plastered across the choir coach's face bright enough to light the entire room.

'This will be the perfect gift for Lexi. It's sentimental and personal bit also mundane enough not to draw too much attention to it where she may feel uncomfortable. I just want this birthday to be perfect, I need for both my girls to know just how much I love them. After the year they've had these birthdays need to be the best I can provide. I have a lot of years to make up for after all.' Shelby silently rationalises her plan of action to herself, all too self aware she was applying way too much pressure to herself but she had her reasons.

Thankfully for Rachel's need for air, Shelby's grip loosens and her hand quickly returns to resting on the fourteen year olds shoulder as her left hand scrolls and clicks against the screen all in search of the perfect locket. Rachel watches with pride as her mama's expression remains excited but deep inside of the petite singer, Rachel was being eaten alive with guilt.

It seemed to spread every time she lied about where she was going or who she was with. In this instance however, it seemed to Rachel it was triggered by the fact her mother was so blissfully unaware. As someone who should be grateful she wasn't being found out, Rachel just felt sick. Yes, the fourteen year old knew she was doing everything for the right reasons but that didn't mean it wasn't taking a toll all the same. When you are fighting for everything you believe but feel like you're swimming against the tide, it's hard to keep the faith and remember just why you're doing it in the first place.

With each visit with Leroy, Rachel felt the resolve in her to continue dwindle away, little by little. As much as the 'hopeless romantic' in the diva in training tried desperately to hold on to the belief Leroy would eventually come through with his end of the deal, logic and reality were hard forces to fool.

Rachel, although desperate to continue her mission and to provide her wounded sister with the answers she more than deserved, was also growing weary of the deceit. Growing disillusioned by her father's inability to meet her even half way.

It wasn't lost on Rachel that Shelby had been through the same emotions and turmoil as Lexi. Because of this, Rachel found her mind often questioning just what fate would befall her sister if this failed and she was left, much like their mother, going a decade or perhaps forever without ever truly knowing one way or another what happened to her son.

'If she has been able to cope with losing both me and Lexi for so many years perhaps even if I fail in getting Lexi her answers about her son, she'll be able to find a way through. Maybe this isn't so all or nothing as I believe.' Rachel's confused, cluttered mind ponders silently as again her stomach knots from the guilt she is carrying due to her secret meetings and interactions with her father.

Inwardly, the smaller brunette shakes her head at her own thought. If only it was as simple as that. This was real life though and as much as Rachel liked to put her trust and belief in everything working out as it should, the teenager knew life was hardly ever that kind or fair.

'You are never going to understand what mama went through or what Lexi currently is, Rachel. Perhaps if you quizzed mom a little about what it was like it will help you though? Even if you can just figure out what would be the worst fate for Lexi. Never knowing and being left in limbo or finding out but 'Barbra' forbid, it ends up being the worst case scenario?' The teenager formulates some sort of action plan within the confines of her mind.

"Mama, when you didn't know where me and Lexi were for all those years. How… how did you cope?" Rachel questions tentatively, her eyes hooded slightly from the way the girl's head is positioned on Shelby's chest and she was looking up to make eye contact.

Of course the sound of Rachel's voice and question in general, brings Shelby's full attention away from the iPad screen. It was a discussion in all honesty, Shelby was caught off guard by. They had discussed what Shelby had done after the girls were taken but never had the mother gone in to too much detail when it came to how she had coped with the emotions of the situation.

Hesitation fills the now silent space between mother and daughter. As Rachel awaits her mother's answer, she can all but see the cogs turning within Shelby's head. Her mouth was half open and green eyes seemed to lose all focus as they space out.

'Why has this suddenly come up? Should I be concerned or is this just a natural curiosity? Crap, why is this panicking me so much?' Shelby's inner voice frantically begins to try and get a grip on the situation the brunette now found herself in.

"Well, I …" Shelby's words die on her lips as confusion settles on her face.

Placing the iPad down on the coffee table in front of them, she then takes off her glasses and returns them to their case. Was she stalling? Most definitely but if it meant she had an extra few moments to collect herself then Shelby was willing to stall with all she had.

'Perhaps you are struggling with this because you don't want to admit to your child that you never really did find a way of coping. At least not one that was healthy. Fuck, why is parenting so difficult? Maybe I should just say fuck it and finish off that bottle of wine after all.' The long time choir coaches continues to converse with herself within the confines of her own mind as her baby waits patiently for some kind of response other than a sentence which trailed off after two words.

Locking eyes with Rachel, who by now seemed to somewhat be retreating into her snuggled position against her mother's chest, Shelby melts. Inhaling deeply, the older of the two brunette's collects herself and decides to just be honest.

"Well, if I am completely honest with you, I don't think I ever did. At least, not truly. It's hard for me to explain but as a mother, not knowing where my babies were, if you were safe and happy, it was a pain that never left me. Coping with that, it's not… It's odd." Shelby softly attempts again to answer her child's question.

Of course, this only seems to confuse Rachel further. Her eyebrows knit together in the middle as she frowns, clearly struggling to understand where Shelby was coming from. Then again, how could she? She'd never been in a position even close to try and compare it to.

Slowly, Shelby lets out a soft breath, some of the tension inside her releasing as she continues to become lost within her daughter's chocolate brown orbs. A delicate smile spreads across Shelby's plump, wine tainted lips as she strokes her thumb up and down Rachel's shoulder soothingly.

"What I mean is, at that time I can't say I 'coped', I existed. I found ways of dulling the ache, ways of trying to distract myself or ignore it but it was always there. I would always have flare ups and reminders and they would send me into tail spins. I did a lot of unhealthy things in order to try and 'cope' but in the end all I did was runaway from my pain and you can only do that for so long." Shelby tentatively explains knowing this probably didn't make much sense.

Still Rachel looked lost, her young eyes showing a defeated expression which pierced through directly to her mom's heart. Shelby's eyes close momentarily as she mentally berates herself for explaining herself so poorly.

"Rachel, when I had no way of contacting you or even knowing where you and Lexi were, it was always with me. The worry, the guilt, the hope that you were both okay, wherever you were. Every single day, I woke up with you on my mind and when I would finally fall asleep, if I did, you were my last thoughts. Trying to cope with that constant, heaviness, uneasiness and dread, it… it drains you and you never 'cope'. You… you find a way to continue but just because you're going through the motions doesn't mean you're 'coping'." Shelby's voice, now soft but laced with emotions attempts to explain to her youngest daughter a period of her life that even she herself didn't fully understand, even now.

'Oh, 'Barbra' this isn't what I wanted to hear. I thought perhaps if Lexi could find a way to cope she would be alright. Listening to mama though, I don't see how that can be possible. Lexi needs answers and whatever I need to do to get them, I will.' Rachel's inner voice narrates the teenager's emotions as her mom pulls her, somehow even closer.

With the room again blanketed with silence, Shelby's hand lifts slowly from her daughter's shoulder and cups the side of Rachel's face instead. Her thumb, now softly brushing against her child's tender tanned cheek, causing those brown eyes to reconnect with her mother's green ones.

"What made you ask about that, baby?" The mother questions carefully, her features soft as she just gazes upon her little girl.

"I was just thinking about… well, Lexi. I suppose I just hoped that there may be some kind of reprieve for her. I had hoped there had been for you, even if just briefly. The thought of you once being in such pain and knowing, Lexi has all that to come, it just… makes me-" Rachel answers in a whisper, her head bowing so her mouth is partly muffled into Shelby's chest.

Shelby gently begins to nod her head in understanding. The older Corcoran's heart rips at the seams as her baby girl reveals her concerns though. Knowing your child is in any kind of pain of course is the worst kind of agony for a parent.

"Makes you sad." The mother interrupts her child's sentence realising Rachel was reluctant to do so with how her words were starting to trail off.

Chocolate brown orbs gaze back into emerald green counterparts as Rachel's plump lower lip trembles ever so slightly. The fourteen year olds head faintly nods in agreement, both her shoulders shrugging to accompany it.

"It scares me. What if Lexi is never able to get closure?" Rachel asks, still partially muffled due to being snuggled so closely against her mother.

Finally realisation seeps into Shelby's brain, her free arm now joins her other one in wrapping her baby securely into her side. The brunette's eyes flutter closed for a moment as she soaks up holding Rachel tightly, praying it would in some way bring her child comfort.

'Oh, Rach. For someone who can often be almost oblivious to other's feelings you sure do tend to take a lot of responsibility on your shoulders in order to relieve their pain. Both my babies are so caring, especially with each other. It just makes me so proud.' Shelby's maternal voice gushes silently as her cheek rests delicately upon the top of her youngest' head.

As her mother's grip around her petite frame increases, Rachel's own eyes close and she grips her own arm around Shelby's waist just a little deeper. Nothing made the fourteen year old feel safer than when her mama held her with such warmth and undeniable love. It may only last until this hug ends but for now, the young brunette's mind is momentarily cleared of her conflicting emotions.

"Sweetheart, I wish there was some kind of answer that I could provide you that would help. I wish I could promise you, Lexi will find her closure and she will be fine. There is nothing more I wish could be true but honey, I .. I can't." Shelby delicately states, the words feeling like she was letting her child down as they slip from her lips.

Rachel's knotted stomach plummets into her feet as her mama only confirms what deep down the diva in training had already suspected to be true. It felt as though this constant vice was increasing its grip around her heart, more and more everyday as realisation sinks in to the always overly optimistic fourteen year old. Unfortunately for Rachel, reality in a situation such of this was hard, near on impossible to deny.

"It's basically, trying to pick the lesser of two evils. You either, hang on to your hope. You cling on to the tiniest bit of belief that eventually you will somehow, someway be healed by finding your baby again. Now, that, that has its own drawbacks." Shelby reveals, her low voice soft but full of firsthand experience which also forms in the way of glazed over green eyes.

'Should I even be telling her this? This is only going to feel more hopeless.' Shelby ponders silently with doubt that this was the best way to handle the situation.

With Rachel's head still laying against her chest, Shelby knew her own emotions were somewhat camouflaged. It gave the older of the two brunettes a second to just look down and observe her youngest daughter, as her own mind debates what was the best course of action to take.

'Well, it is hopeless. At least that is how it feels, you can't hide the truth from her, Shelby. She is smart and perceptive and clearly she already knows because she's experiencing all of these emotions. You may as well ease her mind that she isn't alone or crazy for feeling like she is.' The other side of the mother's brain chimes in.

As her mother's hesitation causes the living room to again be filled with silence, Rachel's arm around Shelby's waist tightens as the fourteen year old pulls herself just a little closer. It was a silent attempt to offer the older Corcoran woman some support, a tender squeeze to let Shelby know her daughter understood how difficult this was.

"It's draining, it eats away at you as you try to hang on and keep positive. Eventually, you will always run out of fight, you hit your limit and then completely crash into despair. Now, it… it doesn't last forever because you convince yourself again, you find your strength again and I suppose you somewhat fool yourself. But it's a constant cycle of having unbending hope and then having none." Shelby finally continues, each word seemingly causing her voice to falter a little more.

Younger ears recognise the pain within each of her mother's words and it quickly starts to tear into Rachel's resolve to continue this discussion. He had not intended to upset her mama and rehash old wounds that no doubt still lingered for the mother of two. After all, you can't possible go over a decade of not knowing where you children are and not be left with trauma because of it.

Unable to stand anymore, the smaller brunette lifts her head from the safety of Shelby's chest and brown eyes seek out her mama's. Delicate, soft eyebrows flatten upon Rachel's face as she absorbs the pain radiating from the older version of herself.

The fourteen year old starts to shake her head, lip parting ready to tell her mom he didn't have o continue but as always, Shelby was one step ahead of her. Softly, a well manicured finger presses to her baby's lips and silences whatever words the girl was about to speak.

'When will I inherit this magical power? I know for a fact Lexi possess it, sure she herself can still be on the wrong end of it but I don't think I have even a glimmer of this skill yet in my arsenal.' Rachel mentally comments, unable to help but become sidetracked as yet again the 'Corcoran' sorcery one ups her.

Plump lips, softly part into a warm smile as Shelby silently informs her daughter, whatever she was about to say wasn't needed. Rachel quickly accepts her fate and she returns back to her previous position laying against her mother, within warm and strong arms.

"Good girl. I know this isn't easy to talk about, for either of us but you've asked me for a reason. A good reason and the whole time I can give you an answer, no matter how difficult it may be, it's my job to make sure I give it to you, honey." Shelby explains softly, resting her cheek once more on the top of Rachel's head.

Within Lexi's bedroom, Santana was now currently laying on her stomach watching her girlfriend huff and puff while trying to clean up the mess her haphazard book fling had caused. Of course the Latina knew she shouldn't find this so amusing but the grin that was plastered across her lips wasn't about to go anywhere.

"You missed a spot." Santana taunts, from her position on the bed, feet dangling over the headboard as her skinny frame lays down the mattress the wrong way. Her head was resting on both of her hands, perfectly cupping her face as dark brown orbs just watch Lexi's clean-up efforts joyfully.

'Oh she is just eating this up.' Lexi mentally groans, her unpleased lip curl only making Santana grin wider once the slightly taller of the two teens looks up from the papers she was currently attempting to restack and gather up.

"Have I ever told you how sexy you are when you're pissed off?" Santana remarks gleefully, her teeth worrying against her bottom lip slightly as already dark eyes seemingly darken a few shades from arousal.

Lexi almost audibly moans at this, yes she knew the raven haired beauty was deliberately teasing her but by god it was working and Lexi felt helpless to resist it. She was always helpless when it came to Santana and the sixteen year old found great pleasure in that fact.

On her hands and knees, the brunette teen's own chocolate brown orbs dilate while taking in Santana's gorgeous form. Her long, jet black hair was freshly washed and dried but Santana hadn't bothered to straighten it due to the relaxed evening herself and Lexi had mutually decided to have.

"You have mentioned it, yes." Lexi drawls out her reply, slowly crawling the few feet closer to the end of her bed, where Santana was now leaning over and down from with enticing plump lips.

Just as Lexi leans up, her breathe caught in her chest, Santana's delicate hand presses to the girl's head and turns it to the direction of some still strewn out pages of paper.

"Unfortunately, you still have work to do. Chop-chop." Santana chirps, clearly amused with herself as she flops over on to her back once climbing back up the bed and resting a pillow out for her head.

'I should have seen that coming but I can't help it. She's so… ugh perfect.' Lexi mentally berates herself as her head lowers in defeat and she sluggishly crawls over to the remaining pages.

As Lexi collects the papers together, the brunette notices one that doesn't seem to belong. It wasn't one of the worksheets her mother had given her to do, it was on lined paper and looked to be some form of letter or note.

"Dear Mami and … P.. Papi." Lexi begins to try and read the note before her. Her voice was low as she speaks the words out loud without any thought but didn't need to be overly loud as it was only to help herself read more clearly.

"I don't… think I … w… will eve… ever be able to… to say the.. these words out loud to you but I … can…. Cannot lie any.. any more to.. who I … am." Lexi continues, at first not picking up the overall message being conveyed by each word but the further she goes the clearer the picture becomes and her heart freezes.

'This is San's, oh my god, she's written… she wants to come out to her parents.' Lexi realises this bombshell within the confines of her mind as she frantically turns to look to the raven haired teenager who was now just staring back at her with tear filled orbs.

Santana was shaking, her tanned skin pimpled from anxiety of just how her girlfriend was going to react to the letter. Lexi feels her heart shatter at the sight of her girlfriend clearly so distraught and scrambles up to the bed and crawls across until she can finally takes hold of Santana's quivering hand.

As the silence fills the bedroom, both teenager's know neither had to say a word to communicate. All it ever took was a quick glance into the other's eyes and they could all but read one another's thoughts.

Lexi's thumb delicately strokes back and forth across the back of Santana's hand, just a reminder that if the Latina wanted to elaborate, she was there and she was listening. The slightly taller of the two teens sits back on her heels, as she's knelt on the bed beside the sat up Santana.

"It's just… I don't know what it is. I wrote it a few nights ago when you were sleeping. It was, when we got back from G-mama C's and whenever I closed my eyes, all I could hear was G-mama C saying to your mom that, I was 'the best possible FRIEND' she could ever imagine for you.'" Santana reveals, dark eyes so strongly connected with Lexi's she could practically hear her girlfriend's inner voice.

A slight twitch across the muscles of Lexi's forehead causes Santana to shake her head, rather frantically because she knew Lexi was struggling to understand what the problem was.

"Lexi, I don't want to be just your 'FRIEND', what me and you have is so much more than that." Santana passionately states, her hand now gripping Lexi's back as desperate dark brown eyes plead silently for her girlfriend to understand.

Feeling the white hot surge of Santana's emotions burn through her own body, Lexi quickly leans up o her knees and tugs the skinnier sixteen year old in to her arms. Holding the beautiful Latina close, Lexi's closes her own tearful eyes and nuzzles her face in to the side of Santana's soft dark locks.

"You are so much more to me than a 'friend', San. You are…" Lexi falters slightly as she pulls back, needing to look back into those darker brown eyes.

Delicate, soft hands cup the tanned but now damp cheeks belonging to the former cheerio as Lexi allows a gentle breath to pass between them.

"I love you. I am madly, deeply and truly in LOVE with you. Whatever other people think or believe about us just being ;friends' I don't care. I know what we are, I know you're… I know and you know, that's all that-" Lexi passionately states but is silenced by a strong pull back from Santana, who brushes both of her girlfriend's hands form her face and instead grips them tightly with her own.

"You don't understand, Lexi. I care, I care that your family thinks we're just 'friends' because we're not. We love each other and I want them to know." Santana interrupts the quickly silenced brunette who suddenly looks fit to burst into a river of tears.

Santana lets go of one of Lexi's hands ad brings her own up to delicately stroke the slightly taller teen's cheek. A sweet, soft smile spreads over the Latina's lips as the interaction causes Lexi's cheek to blush.

'The fact I can cause her to blush with just a brush of my fingers makes me so frigging happy.' Santana mentally comments, unable to help but take note of such a small yet to her important detail of their relationship.

Shifting on the mattress, Santana moves more to one side so Lexi can sit down properly. Their hands stay connected until Lexi gently wraps hers around Santana's petite frame and tugs her against her chest as they lean back in to the pillows, resting against the headboard.

A gentle breath leaves Santana's lungs as she melts into the security of Lexi's body. The Latina's lips curl up into a smile as the gentle rhythmic thudding of her girlfriend's heart fills her ear. With their fingers now interlaced in a gently pyramid resting on Lexi's slightly raised thigh, Santana admires the way they so perfectly fit together.

"Spending all this time with you guys, feeling like a part of the family. A decent family, I don't just want to be known as the 'best friend' of yours. I want to be known as, your… your girlfriend. I want your mom to freak out at the thought of us sharing a bed instead of believing it's no more than a sleepover." Santana says softly, her fingers flexing back and forth against Lexi's. Dark eyes transfixed on the motion as a way to gain courage to speak about this subject which had been bothering her for weeks now.

'Do I tell her that even if mom knows about us she isn't going to care about the bed situation. I've already given her a grandchild and Santana is capable of many amazing things but getting me pregnant, that is not one of them.' Lexi's inner voice quips, unable to help it. She could feel the heaviness in Santana's words and wanted more than anything to be able to lighten them and usually she did this with humour.

Thankfully, Lexi's more sensible side wins out and she just remains quiet in order to fully let the angst riddled Latina release what is on her mind and clearly her heart.

"I am terrified of what will happen when I tell my parents I'm gay. It… it genuinely makes it hard to breathe but…. But the thought of living a lie and forcing you to live it too, that's so much worse. I don't want this, Lexi. So I… I thought I should try to write them a letter and explain, that way maybe it would go over a little easier if I could really think about everything I wrote down." The tanned beauty continues her explanation as the now crumpled piece of paper lays forgotten about on the bed just beyond Lexi's leg.

The mattress springs creak in the otherwise quiet room as Santana leans forward and gathers up her first attempt at, what she knew, would be the hardest thing she'd ever have to do in her life. Lexi's hand reaches out slowly and helps the girl she loves smooth it back out a little.

Lifting her eyes from the paper to Lexi, Santana melts further in to her girlfriend as those puppy dogs eyes encourage Santana to carry on.

"I didn't exactly get very far with it." Santana surmises, half heartedly shrugging her shoulders as Lexi nods in understanding beside her.

Tanned fingers grip a little tighter around the crumpled paper. The inner battle within what Santana desperately wanted to do and what she believed would be the consequences if she did, raging as always.

"Just writing this down was… Lex, it took me nearly three hours. Each time I think I know what to say, I … it's like my mind plays tricks with me. I imagine them reading it and I play out their reactions and I just, I lose my balls." Santana states bluntly, in the fashion only the raven haired beauty could get away with.

Leaning forward, Lexi mirrors Santana's movements earlier and wraps both arms around the former cheerio's waist. The brunette places her warm lips to the exposed, tanned flesh of her girlfriend's shoulder and then presses her forehead lightly against the spot as her fingers interlace over Santana's stomach.

'Typical Lexi, she knows there is nothing she can say so she just holds me instead. God, I love her so much. How can any of what we feel for each other be wrong?' Santana mentally comments, her tensed body merging backwards into the safety of her lover's protecting arms.

The evening darkness was starting to loom more persistently now, not even the summer months could fight it off any longer. Due to this Shelby, somewhat reluctantly reaches to the side lamp and flicks it on before opening up her arms for Rachel to settle back into their previous position.

"Now, as I was saying that is one evil you can battle with. Personally, that was what I did and it was anything but easy which is why I say I don't know if you can even call it a form of coping." The mother states in a slightly hushed tone.

Rachel and Shelby were securely snuggled together, the grey blanket still cocooning them. The conversation subject its self was heavy and harsh but that didn't mean the way they talked it out couldn't be warm and light.

'As invaluable as this information is from Mama's perspective it is truly tearing me apart. I guess, I have never really thought too much about just how being separated from me and Lexi must have affected her for all those years.' Rachel's inner monologue states wearily. As much as the fourteen year old liked to always see the cup as half full, when it came to someone she loved being in pain, Rachel struggled not to very much feel the pain right along with them.

"The other option of course is getting some form of closure. I hit the jackpot with that one baby because I got my babies back. That is … that is the outcome that I pray every single day, Lexi will find too because honestly the alternative it… it terrifies me. At the same time though, is finally knowing one way or another better than constantly living in the limbo of hope that cycles with soul crushing despair?" Shelby asks rhetorically knowing it was impossible to answer with any certainty.

"The lesser of two evils?" Rachel surmises out loud in a whisper, almost afraid to speak louder as if the words may in some way cause more pain.

Nodding in reluctant agreement, Shelby closes her eyes tightly as the sting of tears threaten to make their escape. Just the thought of either of these outcomes being what her eldest had waiting for her in the future, made the mother's soul ache.

"I can't tell you which is better because like I said, I got lucky. I got my happy ending, I found you girls again and have been given a second chance." Shelby reminds her baby, whose body presses just a little more into the security of her mama.

Each brunette knew what that statement meant for Lexi, although either of them wanted to actually utter it aloud. Instead, Rachel's chocolate brown eyes close tightly and she takes in a deep breath, while Shelby places a lingering kiss into her youngest daughter's hair.

The silence of the mother and daughter duo is not awkward, in fact if anything it is peaceful. Both Shelby and Rachel knew what the other was thinking as it was no doubt either the same or incredibly similar to their own thoughts.

'How am I supposed to make this better? That is my job as her mom, I should be able to fix this and yet, I can't. I suppose all I can do is try to reassure her that even if the worst is to happen, we will be okay.' Shelby comments to herself, feeling helpless with her ability to ease Rachel's concerns.

For Rachel the eased quietness leaves her mind even more conflicted than before. The diva in training felt as though, whatever she chose to do when it came to Leroy somehow would hold the answer to Lexi either getting happiness and peace of heartbreak. Of course, due to Leroy's devious ways, even the optimistic fourteen year old knew better than to believe anything with him was guaranteed.

'Do I give my sister her answers, which are just as likely to destroy her or do I allow her to carry on living with that not quite helpful, not quite evil hope?' Rachel's mind questions with the heavy feeling inside her chest increasing tenfold.

"Lexi, she's fighting her own battle and trying to find her own ways of coping. I don't have the answers to make it all okay again. Neither do you or anyone else-" Shelby quietly speaks into the shell of Rachel's ear before she fells the fourteen year old rapidly holt upwards and stare into her eyes.

"Dad does. He has the answers, he can make this all okay again. He holds Lexi's heart in his hands and he just doesn't care. How can he do that, mama? How can anyone do that to someone, let alone their daughter? It just doesn't make sense to me." Rachel interrupts frantically, her brown eyes wide and glistening in the lamp light with unshed tears.

As Rachel's outburst lingers in the otherwise silent room, Shelby has to take a second to collect herself. The anguish in her baby's face sets the mother's heart into overdrive. Gently, her left hand cups Rachel's cheek and she holds the girl's hand with her right one. It isn't until, the mother is sure she fully has her child's attention that Shelby lightly begins to nod her head in agreement with Rachel's assessment of the situation.

"He does, you're right, baby. Your father knows what happened to Lexi's son and he … he refuses to give her any kind of answer. As to why he does that? Honestly, honey I have no god damn idea." Shelby reluctantly admits, her own voice quivering slightly but not with upset, this was with 'Mama Bear' rage.

'I swear I ever lay my eyes on that piece of shit again, I will rip him limb from limb with my bare hands. Evil, that man is pure evil.' Shelby's maternal protective nature rants within the confines of her mind as just the mention of Leroy distracts her with blinding hatred.

The older of the two brunette's takes a needed, calming breath and just runs the pad of her thumb over Rachel's soft, tanned cheek.

"Listen to me, sweetheart. We cannot control what your father does or doesn't do. Just like, we can't predict what outcome, what one of the two evil's Lexi is going to have to deal with. For people like me and you, who love to be on control and know what they're up against, it's a scary concept." The mother tenderly explains, a slight smile tugging at her and Rachel's lips at the summary of their dislike of not having control.

"What we can and what we will do though is be there for her, regardless of any of it. Just like G-mama, Granddad, Uncle Grant, Auntie Bubi and Helena were there for me. That's not to say it's easy because how can it be? Seeing someone you love in a pain you can't imagine and worst of all you can't do anything to make better." Shelby continues, her plump bottom lip being sucked into her mouth for a moment as her emotions get the better of her.

As often happens for Rachel, the small brunette finds herself just hanging off of everyone of Shelby's words. That mixed with the warmth of a strong yet gentle hand pressed to her cheek had the teenager transfixed. She was looking for guidance, for some sort of sign as to what she should do and in her eyes there was no better person on the planet to look for that than her mama.

"We will do it, none the less. When Lexi needs to talk about it, shout about it, cry about it, scream about it, get mad or sad about it, we'll be there. Lexi kept all of this to herself for two years, so it may not be easy for her at first but that's alright. We know now so we can be there whether she knows she needs us to be or not. I can't tell you it's going to be easy or there will magically be some kind of end to it one day. I'll always hope for that but life is rarely ever that kind or fair." The mother of two admits with a soft sigh echoing from her lips.

"Absolutely nothing about this is fair." Rachel mutters in agreement, her face turning slightly into Shelby's palm as her eyes flutter closed.

'Oh Christ, she is going to make me cry. It's the wine, it's all the wine's fault. I knew I shouldn't have drunk it, never drink anything alcoholic Helena gives you. It's always stronger than paint stripper, god damn it.' Shelby mentally rants, trying to fool herself into believing her emotional state was due to the wine she'd consumed earlier and not the conversation subject and fact her youngest was close to breaking down.

Leaning forward, the choir coach lifts her right hand to cup Rachel's other cheek and draws the fourteen year old slightly closer to her. It's enough movement to force Rachel's eyes to open and reveal brimming, soaked brown orbs to the already struggling mother.

"You're right, honey. You are completely right. It's not fair and it's okay to be angry about that and sad about it. Just know, whatever happens or doesn't happen, we will get through it. That goes for anything, not just this situation, okay? We are a family and we stick together. We pull one another up when we fall, we're strong when someone else can't be. We love each other and I promise you my beautiful, little girl nothing, nothing in this world can ever beat that." Shelby states firmly, somehow finding her confidence half way through.

A delicate sob bursts through Rachel's trembling lips as the fourteen year old flies forward into Shelby's waiting arms. Wrapping her child tightly, within her strong arms, Shelby presses kisses to the teenager's head and closes her own tearful eyes.

"It's okay, baby. I've got you, mama's got you." Shelby whispers soothingly, her body instinctively starting to rock the two from side to side as Rachel's tears wet through to her chest.

'I have a real chance to make things easier for Lexi and for Mama, I have to take it. Even if Dad doesn't come though, at least I can say I tried. 'Barbra' knows I have to at least try something or I will never be able to live with myself.' Rachel mentally surmises as the warmth and comfort of Shelby's loving embrace wraps it's self like a blanket around the young singer.

"We will help her, Mama. We will, just like you said." Rachel agrees confidently, despite the warm tears still cascading down her features.

Shelby beams with pride and nods in agreement, her hands soothingly rubbing up and down her youngest daughter's back before she feels the younger brunette slowly pull back and look into her eyes. Sure, the sadness was still lingering and the remnants of tears were lying on tanned skin but Shelby recognised the 'Corcoran' fighting spirit burning within them too. Whatever Shelby had said seemed to have done the trick and as long as her baby was feeling better, that was all the mother cared about.

Delicately, Shelby wipes away the tear tracks form her child's face and strokes back some loose locks of brown hair behind Rachel's ear. This earns a smile from the fourteen year old which allows the mother to know, Rachel was at least starting to feel better once more.

"Now, are you going to help me pick out this damn necklace or not? Otherwise, you can get your butt in the shower and to bed. I mean really, I can't find the staff." Shelby playfully comments, sniffling back the few last tears of her own which she'd managed to hold back.

"Okay, okay, there is no need to threaten me with bedtime." Rachel quips in response as she grabs the iPad from the coffee table and hands it to her mom, quite content with returning to their previous snuggled position to go through the options.

Soon enough everyone is in their respective beds, Shelby, Lexi and Santana all asleep but for the youngest member of the house, sleep was near on impossible. Every time Rachel's brown eyes would shut, her mind would begin to race. If it wasn't the deep rooted concerns over her secret interactions with Leroy, it was empathy filled sadness of the torture her mother had suffered for fourteen years.

'I know she said everything worked out in the long run and that is true but that can't erase over a decade of pain I can't even begin to fathom.' Rachel's inner voice starts up as she tosses in her bed, not for the first or likely last that night.

The petite brunette's hands neatly fold together underneath her head as her well adjusted eyes focus onto her bedside table. Being someone who liked to be up at routine time and being somewhat uptight about not oversleeping, Rachel's phone was not the only alarm the fourteen year old relied on. Rachel was of course nothing if not prepared, so the led red lighting from the digits of her alarm clock let her know it was now three in the morning,

'Just think about all of those special occasions, mama missed out on. Christmases, birthdays-' The girl's mind begins to continue its thoughts but as abruptly as a heart attack, something triggers within the diva in trainings thought process.

Even though alone, nothing stopped the dramatic instincts within the fourteen year old from showing. Rachel bolts upright in her bed, horror across her tired face and a gasp escaping her suddenly constricting lungs.

'No, no this cannot be possible. No, perhaps it just hasn't happened yet. Oh 'Gold Stars' how is it possible I don't even know if it has been my mother's birthday yet or not?' A mixture of shock, regret and terror swirl within the narrative playing in Rachel's mind as she mindlessly leaps towards her bedside table to capture her phone.

There of course was only one person who could answer the young brunette's troubling question and it most certainly couldn't wait until a reasonable hour or even for the sun to begin to rise. Rachel was frantic as her thumb slide across her screen and she scrolls down to her G-mama's number, which she promptly calls.

Not at all mirroring her youngest granddaughter's energy or speed, Dolly outwardly growls at the noise of her phone ringing through her bedroom. This was why Dolly used to turn her cell off at night but the one time Shelby had called her in the middle of the night and couldn't get through had put a stop to that. She still had a landline of course but according to her darling daughter that was besides the point.

Through the pitch blackness encompassing her bedroom, Dolly blindly fumbles for the device which at this point she was more likely to throw into the wall than answer. Her green eyes were barely open, not that it would have made much difference considering the time of night or well early morning.

"Yes." Dolly snaps, her voice hoarse from her still half asleep capabilities and ungratefulness at having been woken up from what had been a nice sleep. Did people not realise she was old and needed her rest?

"G-mama, it's me, Rachel." The truly frightened sound of Rachel's voice squeaks through the other end of the phone and goes a long way in waking Dolly out of her haze.

"Rachel?" Dolly questions in slight confusion as she sits up right in her bed, fumbles for the lamp and forces her heavy eyes open fully.

It is only the that the matriarch of the Corcoran family realises she was holding her phone upside down. She winces at the pain of the bright light now being beamed around her room but ignores it in order to correctly place her phone up against her ear.

"Tweety, what's going on? Are you okay? Where are your mother, sister and Santana?" Dolly demands with urgency, not allowing for Rachel to even confirm it was indeed her.

Normally, her G-mama's icy tone and clearly panicked voice would make Rachel think twice about her choice to act so impulsively. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the youngest brunette was far too emotional and tired to be thinking anywhere near that level of rational. Hence the fact she'd chosen this choice of action to begin with.

By now, Rachel had managed to work herself up to the point tears were again threatening to fall from her chocolate brown orbs. As she sniffles to try and prevent this, Dolly only becomes more impatient for a response.

"Rachel Barbra, you better answer me this damn second. What is wrong?" Dolly snaps, her heart about ready to pound clean from her chest.

Rachel lets out a shocked gasp and it of course instantly melts the older woman who mentally berates herself for being so heavy handed, well mouthed.

"Rachel, please just tell me what is wrong so I can help. Where are you? Are you at home?" Dolly questions again, this time less harsh but still as concerned as she starts to fumble with the screen of her cell phone to bring up the speaker.

It is as she is doing this however that the grandmother notices the time and her demeanour stiffens all at once all over again.

'Her ass wants to be at home at this time of night. If this is some sort of repeat of what Cookie pulled with that house party, I am going to strangle someone.' Dolly mentally warns as she gets up from her bed and looks for her slippers more than ready to make a mad dash to her car in nothing more than her silk slip.

"G-mama, I… I need to know something and only you can answer me." Rachel finally responds, the vulnerability in her voice bringing a confused bottle blonde back to a seated position on the edge of her bed.

"Okay, go ahead. What's… what's the question?" The tired grandmother prompts, her heart somewhat settling back down now she knew this wasn't life threatening. She attempts to stifle a yawn into her elbow though as apparently now the panic was draining off so was Dolly's energy.

"When is mama's birthday?" Rachel asks with great apprehension. The fact such a question seemed highly odd and beyond inappropriate to ask at such a time of night going over the young girl's head by affair distance.

''Gold Stars' don't let it have already happened. Please don't say we have let our mother own by forgetting, well not even knowing her birthday. 'Barbra' forbid it has happened since we have been with her and we just completely ignored it from ignorance. Why didn't me or Lexi ask about this before now?' The young girl's mind rattles off in panic of what her G-mama's answer could end up meaning.

"What?" Dolly answers flatly, perhaps it was the fact she was barely awake or able to keep herself sitting upright that had made her imagine the words that just came from her grandchild's lips.

'If this child has woke me up to ask me when her mother's birthday is, Rachel isn't going to see her own birthday.' The grandmother mentally hisses, tiredness now starting to be over taken by frustration.

"G-mama, please. I am begging you just tell me when Mama's birthday is. It is vitally important that I know so I know ether or not myself and Lexi are the worst daughters of all time or not. Please, G-mama. Please." Rachel frantically begs, the desperation in her word mixed with the heavy tears clearly choking the fourteen year old.

Dolly feels her jaw tighten, a long, slow breath rattles from her tight lips but somehow she manages to bite back the normally unstoppable fierceness she was so feared for. Perhaps it was the fact Rachel sounded so deeply distressed and emotional that kept the G-mama from snapping or perhaps it was just the fact she was far too tired. Either way, the oldest of the Corcoran women pulls her hand up to her forehead and rubs at a suddenly forming headache above her eyes.

"Shelby was born on April seventh, Rachel. Now you need to listen to me and understand that it's okay that you and Lexi didn't-" Dolly answers as softly as she can manage before attempting to pre-emptively calm the situation brewing on the other end of the call.

"WHAT?!" Rachel squeals in distress, interrupting whatever reassuring comments Dolly was trying to make.

'Oh, this isn't good. Of course Tweety would somehow relate not knowing and missing Shelby's birthday as some sort of failure on her part. It's Rachel and she truly believes even things out of her control are somehow her responsibility and if everything isn't perfect, including herself she has failed or let someone down. God damn those Berry men.' Dolly mentally comments as she begins to try in vain to get her youngest granddaughter to listen to her and take a damn breath.

Everything is now falling on deaf ears however as Rachel's fear is confirmed. Leaping from her bed, phone now tightly gripped in her hand at her side, the brunette bounds through the door to the adjoining bathroom she shared with Lexi and then straight through the one connecting to Lexi's bedroom straight after. Hot and rapid tears were streaming down the young girl's face as she blindly leaps forward in the darkness and all but collapses over her sister's bed.

Both Lexi and Santana had been asleep, Lexi's arms wrapped securely around the Latina protectively from behind. The weight of Rachel's body flopping onto their legs brings both teenagers out of their slumber and for Santana her heart into skipping a beat.

'Fuck, we've been caught!' Santana inwardly gasps, everything inside of her feeling as though it is suddenly under the weight of an eighteen wheeler.

The two sixteen year old had been doing nothing more than spooning, an act that could easily be written off considering they were sharing a bed constantly as it was any way but for the Latina it was still a close call.

"Son of a bitch!" Lexi yelps, her hands forming into fists ready to knock out whatever threat had decided it was a good idea to attack herself and Santana that night.

"Lexi!" Rachel wails in utter heartbreak as she dramatically grips for her sister's arms to both pull Lexi closer and herself up from the lying down position across both her sister and Santana's legs. As her brown eyes adjust to the dark room, lit slightly by the swung open bathroom door, Lexi instinctively tugs her sister in to her embrace after the fact the attacker is Rachel seeps through her sleep hazed brain.

"We… we are the… worst…. worst daughters of…all time, Lexi. We have… have failed mama." Rachel states in between hiccups which seem to have been brought on by her current emotional state.

The fourteen year olds head buries its self in to Lexi's chest as warm tears spill down her tanned cheek and leak into the material of Lexi's football jersey. Lexi was far too stunned to do much more than just grip her sibling in a little closer and stroke the girl's long locks back from her now overheated face.

"Rachel, I don't… I don't know what you're talking about. What's happened?" Lexi questions in total confusion as across the bed she locks eye with an equally stunned Santana.

Santana gulps, feeling guilty for being so relieved that her and Lexi's secret had not indeed been rumbled. Scanning Rachel for any sign of what could be wrong, the raven haired beauty spots the girl's cell phone and delicately reaches for it once Rachel lets it go in order to reach up and grip Lexi's top instead.

"Mama's birthday, Lexi. It's in… in April. We were with her then, we were with her and we completely ignored it. We're awful." Rachel chokes out what to her was a reasonable summary of what had gotten her in to her current state.

"Rach, what are you talking about? Mom's birthday is in… Wait, I didn't know that, how did you?" Lexi questions, confusion still etched across her features as her baby sister clings onto her with incredible strength that was tugging the sixteen year old ever closer to Rachel.

"I know you… you didn't know, that's… the problem neither of us did. I asked… I asked G-mama." Rachel retorts, her words sharp but mainly just full of despair.

"RACHEL! RACHEL, DON'T YOU DARE JUST IGNORE ME, YOUNG LADY!" Dolly screams down her phone, holding it to her lips as though that would in some way would affect whether or not she is answered.

The always authoritative voice belonging to the bottle blonde grandmother, vibrates through Rachel's phone but due to not being on speaker it is only a muffled echoing of random noises that comes through. It is enough though to bring Santana's attention back to the device she now held in her hand.

Santana shakes her head fearfully as she holds her breath while turning the phone over, praying to god she wasn't about to see Dolly's name show up on the screen. For a split second, the tanned beauty locks eyes with an equally apprehensive Lexi who was desperately trying settle Rachel back down.

'Wait, she asked G-mama? Why? When? How?' Lexi mentally questions, her eyes conveying these questions with a mere glance into her girlfriend's eyes. Both teenagers' stomachs drop and twist as all focus in the otherwise dark room turns to Rachel's cell phone.

"Fuck me." Santana gasps in defeat as she is faced with a connected call to the one and only Dolly Corcoran at three in the morning.

Lexi's eyes shut in a wince as her worst fear is confirmed. An apologetic looks spreads over the brunette's face as she attempts to reposition her younger sister, who was all but sat on her lap now, to reach for the phone and take the brunt of her G-mama's wrath.

Kicking herself inwardly for her actions, Santana just faintly shakes her head in refusal. Instead of allowing Lexi to jump on the live grenade she picks it up herself and brings it to her ear. A grateful and sympathetic look crosses between the two girlfriends as Lexi tries to shush Rachel back down. At this rate she would have Shelby awake and upstairs wondering who had died.

"RACHEL, YOU BETTER NOT BE IGNORING ME!" Dolly screeches in tired frustration as alls he can make out form the other side is muffled sobs coming from her youngest granddaughter.

"Uh, she isn't ignoring you G-mama C. Rachel, she's just real upset but me and Lexi have it covered." Santana replies, her voice shaking worse than the last leaf on the tree in fall.

The fact it is Santana who answers her catches the older woman by surprise. It thankfully brings her frustration levels back down a few notches though, something both Dolly's vocal cords and Santana's ears were more than thankful for.

"Santana, sweetheart I am sorry for shouting at you. I am just worried what the hell is going on at three in the god damn morning over there. Do I need to call, Shelby?" Dolly questions in a half hearted threat. It was a sure fire way to get the truth from the teen and Dolly knew it.

As the intimidating grandmother apologises to the raven haired teenager, Santana allows herself o let out a breath of relief. Unfortunately this is short lived as quickly Dolly gut punches her with the threat of calling up and getting Shelby involved.

"No! No, no. no, no. Please don't do that G-mama C, please. I swear to you, nothing is going on here. Well, apart from Rachel having some sort of freak out about Ms C's birthday?"Santana desperately pleads, her dark brown eyes now wide as she looks to Lexi for clarification.

Lexi of course is only able to respond with a half shrug of her shoulders. From what Rachel had blubbered out, it seemed their mom's birthday was the lynch pin for the fourteen year olds current upset.

'Well, a shrug. That's helpful, thank you Lexi!' Santana mentally spats, her thoughts not exactly hard for the fellow teen to read when accompanied with a burning resentment coming from Santana's eyes.

Santana could tell she wasn't going to be able to put the pieces back together herself so she quickly places the phone on speaker and holds it out so Lexi could also hear Dolly's information.

"Hmm, yes. Well she did call me asking me when Shelby's birthday was. She was upset because she didn't know when it was. I told her but I think that only upset her more. Tweety said something about her and Lexi being with her during it but not knowing and that made them awful.' Dolly tentatively tries to fill in the gaps of this story for both herself and a clearly just as confused Latina on the other end of the call.

As the explanation fills the room, Rachel only begins to cry harder. Lexi was still confused but at least had a better understanding of what was getting her sister so worked up. She nods her head as if reassuring herself and Santana that she could handle things now.

"G-mama, it's me Lexi. I think I understand why Rach is so upset now. She… Rachel uh, me and her we had no idea when mom's birthday was and uh, she decided to find out tonight at three in the morning, I guess." Lexi takes over the conversation, much to Santana's relief.

'Yes, well I did notice the three in the morning part, Tweety. Considering I am the one she damn well woke up out of a dead sleep.' Dolly rants, thankfully within the confines of her mind.

"About that, I am so sorry Rachel woke you up. Everything is okay though, I promise you. I guess, the fact we were with mom and didn't even know she had her birthday just upset Rach, a bit. I have her now though and I'll talk to her an calm her down. I am so sorry, G-mama." Lexi apologises expertly, her hand now rhythmically running up and down Rachel's back.

'Smooth, Tweety. Smooth.' Dolly praises inwardly, a half smile creeping up on her lips. As annoyed as the older woman had been initially, the fact everything was indeed okay was a relief.

"As long as you're sure you can handle this. Tell, Tweety everything is okay and I love her, will you? When she calms down she is bound to worry about having woke me up." Dolly replies, knowing her granddaughter all too well.

Santana almost scoffs at this and just gives her girlfriend a knowing look, accompanied with a raised, perfectly shaped eyebrow. 'It wasn't Rachel who had to face G-mama C's wrath, it was me. Smurf is lucky I love her so much.' The Latina comments to herself while Lexi offers an apologetic smile in return.

"Also, Cookie, you need to listen to me about this too. Your mother, she didn't care whether you or Rachel knew about her birthday this year. As she told me the greatest gift she got this year was her girls back. I guess she never mentioned it for fear of, well this. My Shelby is a smart one when she wants to be." Dolly explains further, her body now shuffling back to lay in bed once more.

As their grandmother's assurances come from the phone, Lexi forces Rachel's chin upwards, forcing the fourteen year old to pay attention. The older of the two sisters, delicately wipes the younger brunette's cheeks with the back of her hand and nods towards the phone so Rachel knew to take in and believe what was being said.

Rachel attempts to keep her hand hung low but knew better than to try and fight her sister's strength. Admitting somewhat defeat, the diva in training nods in agreement to Dolly's words as her crying turns more into just sniffles.

"I heard you G-mama. Thank you and I truly am sorry for waking you up at such an hour with such a strange request. I hope you can forgive me." Rachel squeaks out nervously, her head now resting against Lexi's chest in a far more relaxed manner.

"You? Oh, I think I can swing it, Tweety. Just promise me you'll never call me at this time again unless it is a real emergency. I am talking life threatening, been arrested emergency." Dolly replies with a chuckle which is quickly followed by a yawn. She really was getting too old for all of this.

A soft breath of relief falls from Rachel's plump lips as she seemingly is able to get away with this one. Still though, the fourteen year old remains glued against Lexi and was showing absolutely no sign of moving any time soon. Lexi shakes her head in disbelief and presses a kiss to the top of Rachel's head while fighting off the, thankfully diminishing urge to strangle her baby sister instead.

'How in the world Rach always manages to get herself and me in this situations, I will never know. I am going to owe, San huge for her help in this.' Lexi comments internally as she reaches out behind Rachel body and grips the tanned beauty's leg and squeezes it to show her gratitude.

"Don't worry G-mama C, I will promise for them both and make them keep to it. You lay back and get some sleep now. Like, Lex said. We've got this now. Thanks though, night-night. We love you" Santana interjects, sensing it was best to let the oldest Corcoran woman get off of the phone and back to sleep as quickly as possible.

"Well, I know I can trust your promises Firecracker. You haven't broken any of the ones you made to me after we got back from New York now have you?" Dolly questions knowingly, while she had the opportunity she may as well tighten the screws, just encase.

Santana instantly feels her heart that had begun to calm back down a little, shoot clean into the solar system. Nervously she digs her nails into the phone cover and her teeth grit, why did this woman have such power over her?

'Poor thing, I probably should cut her some slack. Then again, it did take me nearly a week to convince the fireball of emotion and loyalty not to lay a finger on Jesse or that girl, Lara. I need to ensure she keeps to her word, after all if I'm not allowed to lay a finger on either of them, by Tweety's request than neither is Santana.' Dolly mentally quips as she thinks back to some rather tense negotiations she had been locked in with the Latina shortly after she found out what Rachel's ex boyfriend had pulled during the competition.

Santana's tanned cheek blush lightly with embarrassment. Normally, with any other adult outside of Ms C of course, Santana would tell them to shove it and just do what she wanted and get revenge for Rachel, screw the repercussions. This wasn't like dealing with any other adult however, this was dealing with G-mama C and even Santana wasn't ready to take that on head first or god forbid disobey her.

"I promise you, G-mama C. I have and I am keeping my word. Just like I will keep my word on making sure these two here are sorted." Santana answers, avoiding Lexi's smirk covered face at all costs.

'That's a good girl. Exactly what I wanted and expected to hear.' Dolly comments mentally, pleased that the Latina was indeed seriously keeping to her promise not to retaliate on Rachel's behalf in anyway and to allow the fourteen year old to handle it herself.

"Well then, in that case I love you all too. I love you more at decent hours though. You all better get back to sleep yourselves. Goodnight Tweety, Cookie and Firecracker." Dolly signs off sweetly before ending the call and happily sinking back in to the waiting warmth of her bed.

The silence which the end of the call brings, means all three teenagers are finally able to breathe normally once again. Santana hangs her head as she puffs out a long breath, trying to calm herself back down. She gives a gentle swat to Lexi's arm though, knowing all too well her girlfriend had enjoyed that back and forth with Dolly a little too much. Brushing off the swat, Lexi just grips the raven haired beauty's hand and squeezes it securely, their eyes locking for a moment as they communicate silently between them.

"You are both probably looking for some sort of explanation?" Rachel surmises a little shakily, breaking the few quiet moments as everyone catches their breath and regains their bearings. Her doe eyes look up cautiously at Lexi with a silent plead for her sister to go easy on her.

Of course, Lexi's face just deadpans at the clear attempt from the fourteen year old. Using one of her favourite tools, the 'Corcoran' eyebrow begins to slide up the older brunette's head.

"That is just unfair." Rachel mutters, her annoyance at her sister's ability to so easily win against her obvious.

"No, being woken up at three in the morning and being forced to try and calm down your homicidal G-mama is unfair, Smurf. Now, get to spilling." Santana retorts, both thin arms crossing in an impatient manner over her chest.

'That's one of the reasons I love her so damn much.' Lexi's inner voice points out as he grins with pride at how her girlfriend had handled the situation.

Part of Rachel wanted to try and object, look to her older sister for some sort of get out of jail card but the younger brunette knew she was all out of them after this incident. A slightly embarrassed blush rises across Rachel's cheeks, which thankfully couldn't be discovered in the cover of the still dark bedroom.

"I couldn't sleep and I started just thinking over all different things. The next thing I know I am wondering about Mama's birthday and quickly I realise I don't know when it is. I panicked and I called G-mama because she is the only person who could answer my question." Rachel blurts out her rational in that typical increased speed way she did when excited or nervous.

'Dear 'Barbra', please don't let them ask why the subject of birthdays came into my brain.' Rachel pleads silently as her tensed shoulders tuck up underneath her ears.

There is a moment of silence between the three teenagers, all curled together on Lexi's bed. Despite her current interrogation, Rachel was still curled within her older sister's arms and making no sign of wanting to change that.

"Rachel, you do realise there are numerous people who could have answered your question, right?" Lexi points out as kindly a she can manage considering the time in the morning and having been woken up so suddenly.

The younger of the two brunette's frowns at this statement, her head leaning back to lock eyes with the taller teen in question of what she was getting at. Her sister's apparent cluelessness brings a loud sigh from Lexi's lips as her hand reaches up to pinch the bridge of her nose.

Seeing where this was heading, Santana pinches up a few tissues from the box on the bedside table and shoves them under Rachel's still stuffy nose.

"She means, the British, business lady and twinkle-feet April could have answered you. Hell, even your uncle Grant could have and they all could have done it through a TEXT. Why would you decide ringing your terrifying G-mama at this time in the morning was your only option, do you have a death wish?" Santana interrupts unable to bite her tongue any longer. It had to be said and the raven haired beauty wasn't exactly known for her subtly.

As the Latina's fiery words sink into Rachel's still emotional brain, the fourteen year olds tanned features begin to wash over with understanding. Santana nods along with the revelation and just shakes her head with a laugh because if she didn't laugh she would cry or yell loud enough to wake Shelby. Neither were exactly top options so she goes with the choice of laughter.

"Oh, I guess I didn't think that through entirely." Rachel surmises with a guilt ridden expression of a pained smile across her lips. Lifting the tissue to somewhat hide her now blushing face, the diva in training curls into Lexi's body a little deeper.

Both Lexi and her girlfriend lock eyes in the darkness, both of their eyes now adjusted to the fact they'd been woken in the middle of the night. They share a knowing glance which tells the other any anger at the fourteen year old was residual at best and had come mainly from fear of tangling with a pissed Dolly.

"I apologise, to you both. I just, I completely lost it when I realised I didn't even know my own mother's birth date." Rachel adds sincerely, wide brown orbs looking from Lexi to Santana, trying to gauge their level of frustration towards her.

'See this is where her and Lexi both play dirty. You just can't stay mad at them and it's annoying as hell.' Santana mentally rants as she feels herself soften immediately as she makes the mistake of looking into Rachel's eyes.

Dark eyes roll dramatically as Santana reaches out to Rachel and oats her hand lightly, while doing her best to avoid anymore eye contact with the younger teen though. She didn't need to be softened anymore by those puppy dog eyes.

"Eh, forget it. It just shows you care, I suppose. Ever wake me up at this time again without the house being on fire or a life being in danger though…" Santana threatens with nowhere near as much intimidation in her voice as she would like.

Immediately Rachel nods in agreement with the terms of Santana's forgiveness and feels the Latina squeeze her hand which she quickly reciprocates.

"Fantastic, now do you think we can all shut up and go back to sleep?" Lexi asks hopefully, she was far too tired to do much else than let this go.

As the two sixteen year olds seemingly come to the decision this crisis was now adverted and prepare to lay back down to sleep, Rachel quickly objects with a strong shake of her head. Reaching out she shakes at Lexi's shoulders as the older teen lays onto her front with her eyes already closed ready for sleep.

'Of course it wasn't going to be that easy, I'm never that lucky.' Lexi groans within the confines of her mind as she dramatically flops onto her back and stares daggers into her younger sister's eyes.

"Lexi, you cannot be serious right now. There is no way you are going to just avoid this disaster and go back to sleep." Rachel states in astonishment, her hands now both nudging for the taller teen to sit back up and pay attention.

"Not with you here, she isn't." Santana quips over her shoulder. She was laid on her side facing away from the two Corcoran girls, also desperate to try and salvage some more sleep from the night.

Rachel shoots the Latina and unpleased glare but decides to ignore her comment and focus back on her sister. Why wasn't Lexi seeing this as the disaster the fourteen year old knew it was?

"Lexi! We forgot our own mother's birthday. I can only imagine how unloved and unappreciated that must have left her feeling. It was months ago and she hasn't even brought it up, not once. We absolutely, positively owe it to her to try and make things right." Rachel explains, her voice desperate for Lexi to listen and feel the same heaviness Rachel had been experiencing since she was told this earth shattering information.

'Don't hit her, Lexi. Don't do it. You know how sensitive she is and she doesn't mean any harm. You are just incredibly tired and besides if you did hit her you'd only feel guilty once you have slept. Fuck!' Lexi mentally berates herself as she I forced into action and tugs herself back up to a sitting position in front of Rachel who is now bouncing on her knees on the mattress with urgency.

Tugging her long, dishevelled brown locks back from her face with a tired yawn echoing from her lungs, Lexi locks eyes in the darkness with her younger sibling.

"Rach, you heard what G-mama just said on the phone. Mama, knew we had no way of knowing about her birthday and she didn't care. You have to remember, at that time she'd only just found us again and I would have been fresh out of hospital, right? I'm sure the last thing on her mind was us knowing it was her birthday or not." Lexi attempts to reason with her sister but knew it was going to take more than this to come out victorious.

This counter argument of course is met with nothing more than a 'Corcoran' eyebrow from Rachel. She may not even be aware she was doing it but it was having the desired and tried and true effect all the same.

'Oh, come on. Now she's going to give me my own weapon and use it against me? That is low, so low.' Lexi's inner voice comments with annoyance.

Realising her older sibling wasn't quite ready to concede, Rachel folds both of her arm stubbornly across her chest for good measure.

"Lexi, that is besides the point and you know it. It was our very first birthday back with our MOM and we didn't even know the significance of the day. We didn't so much as get her a bunch of flowers or a hand drawn card. Kindergartners do better for their mother's than we did." Rachel counters, laying on her argument thick.

"How were we supposed to know, Rachel? I couldn't see out of one my eyes at that point and last time I checked you don't have G-mama's psychic ability." Lexi sarcastically retorts, the smallest snort of a laugh coming from Santana who was still facing the other direction.

Rachel spins her attention to the Latina and narrows brown orbs at the skinny sixteen year old with fury. Picking up one of the pillows, the diva in training lifts it above her head ready to attack an unaware Santana. Thankfully, for everyone involved, Lexi intercepts and tugs the pillow from her younger siblings grip and just stares at the fourteen year old as if she had lost her ever loving mind.

'I don't think so, Rachel. That is one hornets' nest you don't want to poke. Take it from me, I have more than enough experience on the wrong side of her stinger.' Lexi warns silently as Rachel seemingly comes to her senses and just nods in agreement she'd very nearly just committed suicide.

"Lexi, please. I know realistically we couldn't have known and ye, perhaps mama was indeed okay with it at the time. It still leaves me with this sinking feeling in my stomach though, like we somehow let her down." Rachel reiterates, her voice far more desperate for her sister to understand where she was coming from.

Lexi attempts to stay strong, stand her ground but the longer she looks into those pitiful, puppy dog orbs of her sister the quicker she starts to become undone. Sighing outwardly at realisation she was fighting a losing battle the older brunette shrugs both her shoulders with reluctance.

"Fine, fine, fine. What do you want to do, Rach?" Lexi finally gives in, the look on her face indicating she wasn't exactly happy about it but knew there wasn't much she could do about it either.

"That's the problem, Lexi. I don't have the slightest idea. I mean, how are you supposed to make up for being completely unaware of your parents birthday whilst living with them? Is there some kind of standard practice in this situation I am unaware of?" Rachel rambles, her speed of speaking increasing with each word which passes her lips.

'Oh boy, this long night is only going to get longer. I wish I knew how to lessen her dramatic tangents but I don't think even if I knew how I'd have the strength.' The older of the two sister's inner voice comments as a heaviness take residence in the pit of her stomach.

Clearly having had enough of this by now, Santana flips over onto her other side and stares at the sisters in front of her. Staring from brunette to brunette in disbelief they were unable to figure this out for themselves, the Latina sighs heavily.

"If I tell you what to do and help you organise it, tomorrow." Santana clarifies her terms, eyes locking with Rachel's knowingly.

"Will you please shut up and lay down so we can all get some damn sleep?" The sixteen year old huffs out her continued proposal for a solution to this problem.

Desperate for whatever form of help the raven haired teenager can offer them, Rachel is quick to nod her head in agreement to whatever Santana was demanding. At this point, the diva in training was so desperate she would have probably agreed never to sing a 'Barbra' song again if it meant they could make this up to Shelby. Well, maybe not quite that far but still.

Lexi watches Rachel's head bob up and down in agreement as if she was a bobble head and happily gives her nod of agreement to these terms, like Santana desperate to be able to get some more sleep.

"Right, well in that case it's simple. You make it up to your mom by giving her a birthday surprise no. Sure it's belated but at least she'll know that now you both do know when her birthday is and what happened you're trying to make it right." Santana offers up her suggestion, fighting back a yawn as she sinks further into the pillow beneath her head.

"That's fantastic and all Santana but what are we supposed to do as a surprise?" Rachel questions further, for a solution she wasn't exactly blown away yet. Her disappointment clear both in her tone and the look on her face.

Santana's heavy eyes widen at the annoyance from the younger brunette and her jaw tightens as she fights her instinct to snap in response.

"Do I really have to do all of the heavy lifting for you? Uh, fine. You… I don't know throw her a party or something. Why don't you get her friends to come over at the weekend and I don't know do a spa day or something?" The raven haired beauty suggests, pulling the spa day idea completely out of her ass but an idea is an idea no matter where it comes from.

"A spa day? Hmmm, I suppose that could work out rather well. We could invite auntie Bubi and auntie Helena, G-mama as well and just have a girl's day?" Rachel adds on to the Latina's initial idea quickly fleshing out the details as she goes.

Santana nods in agreement to Rachel's added ideas, her eyes flickering open and closed with decreasing level of speed as her tiredness begins to overwhelm her. It was far too late or far too early for this conversation or any conversation actually.

'Why won't she just let us sleep? Why does she hates us so much?' Santana questions inwardly, her eyelids popping open long enough to watch Rachel who seemed far too energetic of her liking.

"Fantastic, we have a plan. We can do it at the weekend and sort all the details out tomorrow." Rachel continues, her voice now full of excitement and optimism, both her hands coming together for a little victory clap.

Santana nods her head in agreement, a smile on her lips as her eyelids finally shut for the last time. They were too heavy now to open again so she decides to just pray Rachel would get the hint and either go to her own room with her boundless energy or lay down and go to sleep herself. Either way, there was only one play the Latina was going and that was to sleep.

'Oh, yes poor thing. She is exhausted, I really should let her get some sleep.' Rachel comments within the confines of her mind as she turns her attention now towards her sister.

Rachel frowns as Lexi is no longer sat up in front of her but instead face down in her own pillow, mouth slightly open and not so much on her way to the land of dreams but already there. The fourteen year old smiles to herself and gentle clambers off of the bed, pleased that her panic stricken episode was now resolved with a plan that would hopefully make all wrongs right again.

As the smallest brunette takes her leave of her older sister's bedroom, the gentle breathing of her sleeping sister and sister's best friend filling the otherwise quiet room, Rachel can't help but chuckle to herself.

"Light weights." She whispers with a shake of her head as she happily returns back to her own room.

Sleep would likely not be coming her way tonight at all but at least she could spend the time organising and thinking up ways to make this spa day the best belated birthday surprise she possibly could. At least if she as focused on that the crippling confusion and battling emotions to do with Leroy's reappearance in her life would be put on the back burner.


And we come to an end of another chapter.

As I stated above, I might be ending this fic. It takes a lot of energy and time to write twenty thousand plus word chapters every time and I do love the story and the characters but if people aren't interested which is fair enough then I don't think there is any need to continue. That's not to say I don't appreciate everyone who has read this and taken the time to read it and put up with my breaks due to my health and what not because I have and do.

I haven't fully made my mind up yet but if and or when I do decide to end this I will first add a special post giving all my thanks to everyone who has ever written a review for this. Anyway, I just wanted to let anyone who may want to know what is going on and what the plan is.

Also the book in which Lexi was reading from is 'Mary Poppins by P.L. Travers' Although I am sure most of you knew that anyway but thought I should give credit where it is due.

Until next time stay safe, happy and well ;;'x