Paralyzed
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A/N-thank you very much to everyone who kindly read and reviewed the last chapter. Your feed back keeps me motivated.
Chapter Fifty-Eight-Force Vision
"I just assumed he knew." Ben defended himself.
"You should never just assume, Ben." Rey let out an irritated sigh. "I'm going to have to do some damage control."
"Um…it might be a little late for that. Hux already left to find Rose." Ben admitted sheepishly.
"Great. Just great."
Ben could picture Rey throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation. "I'll go and find him." He offered.
"No way, Ben Solo. You stay right where you are and stay with the twins. I'll find him." Rey stated firmly. "And Ben…"
"Yes, sweetheart."
"Don't let Ally and Tai anywhere near the sugary snacks, otherwise they'll be bouncing off the walls all night." Rey reminded him as her voice faded out in his mind.
Ben glanced down at his children. Aleia and Tai grinned up at him, their hands and mouths smeared with what looked suspiciously like chocolate. "Oops, too late." He said, grinning right back.
Rey was out of breath by the time she managed to track Hux down. She thought he would have headed straight for the quarters he shared with Rose but when she arrived to intercept him, neither one of them were there. Confused, Rey had made the long trek across the base in search of him. When she asked around if anyone had seen either of them, they shook their heads. It was so frustrating and she was beginning to regret offering to fix Ben's mess, when she came upon Hux quite by chance. She left the base and went outside to spend some time in the butterfly garden to get some fresh air. To her surprise she found Hux sitting in the middle of the tall grasses, staring sightlessly at the beautiful butterflies flittering all around him. Rey approached him cautiously, not really wanting to disturb his quiet reflection. When she drew closer, she was astonished to see the glimmer of tears on his cheeks.
Armitage Hux was crying….
Rey immediately regretted her intrusion. Hux had clearly come here for privacy as it was the last place anyone would expect him to go. As she was about to leave a solitary butterfly, with wings of yellow and gold, rose up in front of her. It floated in the air, letting the gentle breeze eddy beneath its wings, curling in the sweetest of swirls. Rey watched it pass by her, fast despite its erratic path, choosing direction by a silent serenade of the blooms. It landed right beside Hux, startling him. He jumped, turning his head slightly to find Rey standing a few feet away from him. His whole face flushed with embarrassment at being caught crying. Scrambling to his feet, he put his head down and charged past Rey in an effort to escape her scrutiny.
"Hux!" Rey called after him. He only increased his pace. "Hux!" She tried again. "Please, stop! Wait. I didn't mean to intrude. I'm sorry." When Hux still showed no signs of slowing down, Rey changed tactics. "Armitage, I know about the baby. Ben told me." She said, using his first name this time.
Hux stopped abruptly as if he had hit an invisible brick wall. Rey watched as his shoulders curled in on one another before his whole body began to shake. His sobs were stifled at first as he attempted to hide his grief, then overcome by the wave of his emotions he broke down entirely, all his defences washed away in those salty tears. When he at last turned his face to Rey he was a picture of grief, loss, devastation.
It took a while for Rey to get over her shock at his total breakdown. She remained where she was as she waited for him to compose himself. She was unsure what to do, whether to draw nearer and give him a comforting hug or just retreat and give him some space. Hux wasn't the kind of individual that you hugged. He could be so reserved-not when he was with Rose, with her he was a completely different person-but with others he remained diffident and slightly withdrawn.
"What can I do to help?" Rey asked after a while, not knowing what else to say.
"There's nothing you can do." Hux choked out. "Unless you have a way of erasing my past."
Rey's eyes widened slightly as understanding dawned. "I know you're scared. You can't let your past affect your future, Armitage. You are not the same man you were then."
"Of course, I am." Hux said bleakly. "Rose deserves better. The baby she's carrying deserves better. I've done terrible things. My father was an evil man, Rey. He was a terrible father, he hurt me-both psychologically and physically. He raised me to be a monster and with Phasma's help I killed him…like father, like son. Isn't that what they say? I don't want to inflict on my own child what that abusive man inflicted on me."
There was a tightness in Rey's throat when she answered. "You have done terrible things in the past, Armitage. That can't be changed. But you have changed. You are not the man you were then. Your fears are valid but you are not your father. And the fact that you are so worried proves that you are nothing like him."
The beads of water started falling down from Hux's eyes again, one after another, without a sign of stopping. "I love Rose so much." He said hoarsely. "I'm frightened that she thinks the same things I do. She's been withdrawn for days. Pushing me away…. I thought she was ill. It never occurred to me that she was pregnant."
"Rose is scared. But not for the reasons you think." Rey explained gently. "I was the same when I first found out. I kept it from Ben because I needed time to process how I was feeling. Rose is doing the same. We're still in the middle of a war, bringing a new life into the world is terrifying enough without factoring that into it."
"What do I do?"
"Talking to her would be a good start." Rey suggested with a small smile. "And let her do the same. Tell her that you know and be prepared to be patient and just listen. Just be there for her, Armitage. Support her. That's all she wants."
Hux's lips trembled and his shoulders heaved with emotion. "You won't tell anyone about this?"
"I won't tell anyone." Rey emphasised the word 'tell' as she promised. Ben already knew. He would have heard it all in her head but technically she hadn't actually told him so in that respect she wasn't lying.
"Thanks." Hux mumbled as he wiped his face with the sleeve of his overalls. "I'm going to find Rose."
Rey watched him go with a small smile playing about her lips as Ben's voice filled her mind. "You did amazing, sweetheart."
"I did, didn't I." Rey's smile widened at his praise as the butterflies danced in the air around her.
Rey placed her hands on Ben's shoulders, trying to work the knots out of his muscles, trying to get him to relax. Her touch always worked. It did now. Ben immediately responded to her light touches. Her lips were trailing kisses over his face, sliding down his neck, and then his left shoulder.
"That tickles." He admitted.
Rey's fingers slid under his shirt and ran over his taut stomach. His muscles tightened under her hand. "Come here." Ben's voice was commanding, his eyes blazing with something she couldn't define. He pulled her around to sit on his lap and kissed her, full on the lips. Heat rushed through her body, racing along every nerve. Quickly Rey pulled Ben's shirt over his head. She marvelled at his skin, so perfect and flawless, just as it always would be. She leaned down to kiss his breastbone and followed the line over his stomach. He groaned as she reached the waistband of his undergarments, breathing heavily. Rey couldn't believe how powerful she felt, eliciting this reaction from him. She straddled him, pushing his undergarments down over his hips. Ben groaned again, rolling Rey onto her back and shrugging off his undergarments in one swift movement. He lifted the hem of her tunic and kissed his way up from her naval until he reached her brassiere. The warmth of his lips was making her melt.
Ben inhaled sharply as Rey shrugged off her tunic and arched her back. His hands skimmed up her body sending heat trails in their wake. He slipped one behind her back and unclipped her brassiere. She let it fall down her arms until it fell onto the growing pile of abandoned clothes. Rey rolled onto her back again while Ben unfastened her pants and pulled them off, along with the rest of her clothes. He began to reverse his kisses until he reached her naval. Then he went lower and lower. Rey's fingers fisted in his hair as she suddenly realised his intent. As his warm tongue lapped at her, she cried out, quickly clapping her hand over her mouth as she tried to stifle her cries of pleasure.
Rey fell into a deep sleep, completely sated from her energetic lovemaking with Ben. She was totally relaxed and at peace. At first, she didn't feel the initial stirrings of the Force vision fluttering at the edges of her consciousness. When she became aware, she began to move restlessly in Ben's strong arms, dismissing it as a bad dream. But it wouldn't leave her alone. No matter how hard she fought to ignore it, the more the vision was intent on invading her mind. Despite her best efforts to fight it off, the nightmarish vision began to play out in her head, until she felt she might die from the pain in her brain. She desperately tried to wake up, screaming for help, yet her eyes refused to open, instead cursing her to live through her worst fears….
Aleia, dressed all in black with her face covered by a deep hood, advanced along the walkway. She stopped upon hearing the voice of her brother, calling out to her from behind, using her birth name. She turned slowly to face him; the air stolen from her lungs. She had always taken breathing for granted until the day her ribs became steel traps. The cosy world she had once lived in was nothing but a one-way mirror, her true self had been on the other side all along.
"Tai Solo, I have been waiting for this day for a long time."
Aleia watched as her twin walked slowly toward her, his handsome features settled into a serious frown. He looked so much like their father in that moment that her resolve faltered.
"Take off that hood so I can see you properly." Tai demanded. "I dare you to look me right in the eyes, Ally."
"What do you think you'll see if I do?" She taunted him.
"My sister."
Aleia drew her hood back, revealing her heart-shaped face to her brother. She was paler than he remembered. Her skin hadn't been touched by the sun in a long time. She wore her shoulder-length black hair twisted into a loose braid, but her eyes, her beautiful hazel eyes were filled with a wealth of pain. "Your sister is gone. She was weak and foolish like her brother. So, I destroyed her."
"That's what Sidious wants you to believe but its not true." Tai took another step toward her. "My sister is alive."
"No." Aleia shook her head in denial. "The emperor is wise."
"Sidious is using you for your power. When he gets what he wants he'll crush you. Just like he did to Anakin Skywalker, just like he tried to do with Luke Skywalker. Like he nearly succeeded in doing with our mother and father." He took another small step, frowning when Aleia shook her head again, retreating from him. "You know its true." He insisted.
There was another long beat of silence. Aleia stared at her brother, her lips quivering slightly when she answered. "Its too late." She said, her voice breaking.
"No, it's not." Tai pleaded. "Leave here with me. Come home. We miss you."
"I'm being torn apart." Aleia cried suddenly. "Tai, I want to be free of this pain. I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it. Will you help me?"
"Yes. Anything." Tai promised, his eyes softening.
Aleia cast her eyes down, her whole frame trembling as she reached for the saber attached to the belt draped around her slim hips. She pulled it off, holding the hilt in her gloved hands as she held it out to her twin like a peace offering. Tai glanced down at the familiar double-bladed weapon that was once wielded by their grandmother, Sapphire. He placed his hand over it boldly as he made eye-contact with his sister once more. They gazed at each other for a long time before there was a sudden blaze of red as Aleia ignited her weapon…
"NOOOOO!" A tortured scream erupted from Rey's throat as she woke abruptly from her nightmarish vision. She was breathing as if her body was being starved of oxygen, gasping. Her breath came in short and shallow bursts while her tears fell like hurricane rain. Turning her head to the side she saw Ben sitting beside her, his expression a mirror of hers. "He knows, Ben. Palpatine knows!"
"Rey." Ben's tortured voice cut through her as he reached out to embrace her but Rey pushed him away as she climbed out of bed. He clambered after her, intent on pulling her into the safety of his arms but Rey wasn't having it. She didn't want to be comforted. She was angry! So, fucking angry! Her rage blinded her as she began to scream to the empty air.
"YOU CAN'T HAVE THEM. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME, YOU EVIL BASTARD? I'M COMING FOR YOU, SIDIOUS. I'LL KILL YOU. I'LL KRIFFING KILL YOU."
Anger boiled deep in her system, as hot as lava. It churned within, hungry for destruction, and it was too much for her to handle. The pressure of this raging sea of anger made her go completely feral and she lashed out at Ben as he tried to calm her down. She was inconsolable, drowning in the red mist that Sidious had provoked in her. Ben wrapped his strong arms around her from behind as she fought him, flinging words and accusations at him she didn't mean. The door to their room opened and the twins appeared, alerted by their mother's screams, they stood huddled together. Tai's arm was around his sister as he comforted her.
"Daddy? Mommy?"
Their frightened voices pierced the red mist of Rey's anger. She collapsed against Ben, sobbing wretchedly. He glanced over his shoulder at his quivering children and sighed in relief when he saw Kuruk appear behind them. Rey's agonised cries had gone far beyond their quarters. "Please look after them." Ben pleaded with Rey's father.
Kuruk quickly did as he asked. He bent down and scrooped Tai and Aleia up into his arms and carried them away out of earshot of their parents. The darkness she felt had swallowed her whole for a little while began to dissipate. Rey slowly emerged from the anger that had possessed her enough to look up at Ben, only to find his dark eyes blazing with fury as he let his own anger bubble over. He took hold of her face in his hands and stared deep into her eyes. "This ends now, Rey." He vowed. "No more hiding. Its time for you and I to go to Exegol. The Resistance fleet is strong enough now to face his. Its time to finish this."
"Yes." Rey agreed hoarsely as the nightmarish Force vision continued to torment her. Her evil grandfather would not claim their children. "Its time."
A/N-thanks for reading! Please review.
