Lily straddled the edge of sleep and waking, her mind fogged and confused. Beryl's scent was heavy around her, more musky than normal, as well as her own, as strange as that was since she usually couldn't smell herself at all. Her scent had a spark to it that she didn't recognize, and she felt warm, especially in her lower stomach and hindquarters. Raging hot, and damp.

"Lily," Beryl called out, breaking into her half-dream. A paw pat her forehead, gingerly, as if trying to avoid touching her any more than necessary. She vaguely interpreted his uncertain growl as being worried or embarrassed, which helped draw her from her slumber.

"Wha'?" she slurred, blinking rapidly as she tried to drive the fog from her mind. It was odd for sleep to cling to her like it just had, and she wasn't sure what was going on.

"It's dusk," Beryl huffed. "You might want to go jump in the river before we head out."

"That will wake me up," Lily agreed with a groggy rumble. She pushed on her paws, belatedly noticing a damp patch in the grass under her hindquarters as she rose.

"I will be waiting over here," Beryl said quickly, retreating so fast she felt as if she was missing something.

Lily watched him go, wondering what she was missing. She still felt odd, riled up and sleepy at the same time, and watching him leave only made her feel stranger.

There was a pleasant tingling sensation between her hindlegs, and she stilled as she put all the pieces together. Odd, pleasant sensations, an unusual-feeling dream, Beryl trying to avoid drawing attention to her, the smell still clinging to her nostrils, a wet patch under her in a certain place…

She scented the wetness to confirm what she had guessed, then took Beryl's advice and headed to the water, wondering what it all meant. Her body was trying to send her a message, one she thought she had already received, if not acted upon. She hadn't had one of those dreams… ever, that she could remember, though Pina had taken her aside once to mention such things, back when she was a fledgling.

The water was cold and strong, and thoroughly washed away both her lethargy and her lingering arousal in the brief time she suffered the icy chill and disorienting push on her paws. By the time she leaped out onto the bank, she was composed and hoping to shove this inconvenient incident behind her before Beryl read too much into it. She still hadn't decided whether to follow this sort of urge or not, and until she did decide, she didn't want him aware that it was even an option, for fear of him influencing her choice. It had to be her decision first and foremost, not something she was talked into.

"Let's agree to pretend that didn't happen," Lily said upon seeing Beryl waiting by one of the dying blue-green bushes. That had to be pure chance; he didn't even know what that sort of bush did. He was staring at her, but even as she noticed that he looked away with a shrug of his wings and a nod, so she was probably imagining that.

"It slips my mind sometimes that you are only… what, ten season-cycles old?" Beryl asked. "That sort of thing happens to anyone under twenty, on occasion. It's nothing to be embarrassed about."

Lily chose not to bring up his awkwardness in waking her; that was probably the fault of her making him promise to not make advances on her, not any inherent discomfort for what was going on. "This hot-season will be my eleventh, yes," she confirmed. "How old are you?"

"Honestly, I do not keep track," Beryl admitted sheepishly. "It was hard for a period of time, almost impossible really, and I think Spark knows my exact age better than I do. Somewhere under thirty."

"How can it be hard?" she asked, happy to lead their conversation firmly toward safer skies. "Just count the seasons."

"There are places where you cannot tell what season it is, and if you spend long enough there, it becomes impossible to know if one has passed, or five," Beryl rumbled. "I spent time in one such place, Spark did not."

"What about Ember?" Lily asked. "Where was he?"

"Dead and also running around as a No-scaled-not-prey fledgling," Beryl said wryly. "He's probably not sure about his age either, but he has a much more solid excuse."

"I guess Pearl or Ember told you how much I know now," Lily huffed.

"We keep each other up to date on stuff like that, especially when knowing means I can relax about what I avoid talking about," Beryl confirmed. "I heard you were not particularly pleased to find out that there was more to what he could do than you were told?"

"No, and I still feel justified in my reaction," she said calmly. "In retrospect, you both played a tricky game of telling some of the truth without telling me what I really would have wanted to know."

"You are not mad at me about that, are you?" Beryl asked.

Lily shook her head, dismissing the very idea. "It was on his behalf, and it was a matter of avoiding confrontation," she reasoned. "You just left it up to him to explain, and he performed the majority of the deception. I can't complain about you being loyal to your Sire." Not when his Sire, and by extension Pearl, were on her side, more or less. Even if it did bother her, she wasn't about to worry about it now, when Ember and the rest of Beryl's family were nowhere to be found.

"But," she added a moment later, "I don't feel entirely comfortable around Ember."

"You'll get used to it," Beryl said, unbothered by that admission. "It's only scary until you know him well enough, and then it is just a part of him like any other."

"If you say so," she conceded. She didn't agree with that; what Ember could do was inherently unsettling, and no amount of familiarity would get her to forget what he was capable of. But Beryl had proven right before, and she wasn't willing to start an argument over something so trivial.

"I hope he's okay," Beryl murmured, looking up at the dense tree cover. "Wherever he is. The rest of them, too, but him most of all. He will be the one in the most danger. There were Deathgrippers roaring in the distance all throughout the afternoon, and I cannot help but wonder what they were doing."

Lily growled and dropped back to walk behind Beryl, wanting to keep better watch on their surroundings. "I almost forgot we are being hunted," she admitted.

"Yes…" Beryl looked back at her with an unreadable expression. "You seemed lighter. More carefree."

"I was free of worry about the very real dangers stalking us and my people, yes," she said with a snort, somewhat amused despite herself. "It might feel good, but it is not safe to be so oblivious." Not to mention that she had not felt much less stressed, talking about deception and lies.

"Not now…" Beryl trailed off. "Not ever, maybe, but if you cannot ever relax, you will stress yourself until you start making mistakes. Since you cannot do anything more than what you are already doing, now would be the best possible time to let go and relax."

"I am trying, when it comes to worrying about my people," she admitted. "I know I can't do anything more for them. But it's hard." She was experienced in avoiding certain subjects in her own thoughts, but this was different because she couldn't just lock the memories away and hide from them. Someday, she would need to dig them up and resume being alpha, and she would need to do it without missing a beat, without drowning in built-up guilt, no matter what state her people were in when she found them.

"Focus on the here and now," Beryl advised, his deep voice soothing in her ears. "The sounds of the forest, the feeling of wind on your face, the chill in the air… The little things, what is going on around you. As a side benefit, this will make you much more observant." He ended his words with a lilting purr, one that made her purr back at him.

It was good advice; she tried to listen, feel, and see without thinking beyond their walk…

And her eyes drifted to his tail. She examined the veins in the membrane, and then her eyes slid up toward his backside. There, she found herself looking at the base of his tail and trying to remember the vague feelings she had dreamt of that evening. The encouraging warmth, the strong scent that drew her in, her own scent rising to mix with it. The heat down between her back legs, her own pulse growing stronger and more noticeable in that place.

She huffed quietly and tried to focus on the less alluring sights, lest she become interested enough that Beryl noticed somehow. The trees swayed with the cold wind, and moonlight flickered across drifts of snow and dry grass alike, a thousand speckles of light and darkness intermixing, playing across scales and lending depth to what would otherwise be a shadow, curves and bulk to a flat shape stalking through the forest in front of her… And she was back to admiring Beryl.

"This isn't working," she said honestly, neglecting to give context to her complaint. "I need another sort of distraction." Ideally one that did not make her feel like a lust-addled young adult unable to control herself. She had never felt this way before, and while she liked the feelings, being unable and unwilling to control or act on them was frustrating.

"Another distraction?" Beryl glanced back at her, seemingly noticing nothing amiss. "I could give you the basics of hunting, so that you will be ready to join me next time."

"Perfect," she barked, a little more loudly than she had intended. As they walked, she squeezed her hips together, trying to drive away the unusual feeling. It didn't really work, but she kept doing it anyway, at a loss for any other method of calming herself without being obvious about what she was doing.

"Right…" He glanced back at her, then stopped to look down at the forest floor. "Here is something."

"Prey?" she asked, walking up beside him again.

"See anything about this spot?" he replied, gesturing with his paw.

She examined the tossed medley of sticks, fallen leaves, and grass blades. "No," she admitted, not at all surprised by how unremarkable it was. If this was something easy, she would have learned it for herself long ago. Pyre would have taught her in more than vague explanations about tracks, scents, and patterns prey kept to so long as they did not think they were in danger.

"Not even in that little mud spot?" Beryl clarified, shifting a leaf for her to see where he was talking about.

"I see a small feather," Lily observed. "Is that what you mean?" It was a puny, bedraggled thing, torn and with the hard part sticking out of the mud at an angle.

"Yes, exactly," Beryl chuffed. "This is worthless, hunting and catching birds isn't even enough to break even. You'll make yourself hungrier during the hunt than the bird will sate."

"But you brought it up because it is a type of track to give me an idea of what I should be looking for when it comes to more worthwhile prey?" Lily guessed.

Beryl let out a long, amused rumble. "I have to admit that it is refreshing to teach someone who will not immediately demand to know why I bothered in the first place when I do something like that."

"Someone who thinks before they speak, you mean," Lily purred.

"It's rarer than you make it sound," he replied. "I always want to ask whether they think I like to waste time on irrelevant things. If I say I am teaching something, then I am teaching it, and it would be better to wonder what I am teaching and why."

"So what you are really saying," Lily hummed, "is that you're glad to be done teaching my pack to fight." She did her best to not think about why he might be done for good, but it was hard…

"Let's get back to the task at paw," Beryl suggested rather loudly. Lily glanced up, startled.

He pawed at the leaves, pressing them down. "What am I doing?"

Lily avoided stating the obvious, instead trying to connect his actions to what he was trying to teach. It would have been embarrassing to fall into the trap of getting stuck on details right after he had praised her for avoiding it. Luckily, the real answer was easily discerned. "You are making a pawprint," she assessed. "Another type of track."

"Yes, though it's not working very well," Beryl admitted. "These leaves will stay down for a while, but they'll quickly be covered by others. Impressions are best found in mud or sand, both of which you'll get by water, which prey need to survive."

"Water that we are walking away from," she noted. "So much for that."

"That's necessary for our survival," he said with a grimace. "And we should keep moving. Keep your nose down and your eyes on the ground. I have noticed several little trails already tonight, other things that are too small for us to bother with, and I want you to call them out as you find them. Learn what's not worth going after, and you will find it much easier to ignore in the future."

"I understand," she hummed. He walked forward, and she let him take the lead. Her nose went to the ground, and she sniffed at every patch of leaves she passed over. There was a myriad of smaller, subtler scents she never usually noticed, but none were particularly interesting.

She kept her head down and focused on the admittedly boring task anyway, even once the novelty of it wore off. She knew a bit of the theory of hunting from Pyre, and Beryl hadn't said anything she couldn't have figured out for herself, at least not yet, but focusing on his lesson was doing wonders for keeping her mind off of the things she couldn't change.

A distinctly male scent promoted itself to her attention as she walked, and she snorted out, almost amused. All she was smelling was him, his scent wafting over when the breeze shifted her way. It was nothing like what she had smelled on herself earlier, just the normal scent of an adult male.

Her thoughts drifted away from prey, and she took in his smell more deeply. It had its subtleties, just like any dragon's scent. She could tell that he was healthy, not sick and diseased, and… intriguing.

She could tell he was available. That was not new, it was a simple thing to notice that there was no female scent drifting through his, but it was certainly more interesting to her now, in this situation, than it otherwise would have been.

She huffed his scent out of her nostrils, or tried to, at least. It refused to go, clinging and reintroducing itself with every inhale, however slight. She found herself needing to press her hips together again, and her eyes drifted back up to him.

It was like a sickness of the mind, but natural and without a cure. She didn't even want to cure it, not really, not when it kept her mind off of other things. She did feel lighter and more carefree when she wasn't thinking about-

"Stop," Beryl huffed, throwing his wing out. "Look. Silently."

Lily did not bother asking how one looked loudly, and instead did as told. She could see many gnarled old trees around them, and a big beam of moonlight, and a bunch of broken branches around the hole…

Something had crashed through the trees here, something big, and she could faintly smell a familiar, unnatural odor. Some of the branches had streaks of white on them that were too flat and thick to be snow or ice.

If that were all, she would go forward to investigate, but the same thought that had undoubtedly occurred to Beryl had wormed its way through her mind, too. A Deathgripper had crashed down here, but why? And had it left, or was it still around?

Beryl moved forward, carefully and silently pacing around the outskirts of the moonbeam, his eyes on the mingled leaves and snowdrifts around it. Lily went the other way, checking for the same thing, and dreading what she might find.

Because what if the Deathgripper had come down second, after one of her people? What if there had been a chase? What if she found old blood or smelled someone dear to her?

There was that same pungent odor, the scent of the white coloration the Deathgrippers had donned like mud to blend in with the snow. It twisted and mingled with everything else, but she didn't think there were any light wing scents mingled in, just Deathgripper, snow, and the forest.

"They went off this way," Beryl huffed quietly. "Alone. Doesn't look like they were following anyone."

Lily looked up at him, across the pale beam of light, and shook her head. "If there was a chase, someone else might have landed nearby. We should follow-"

"No, we shouldn't," Beryl interjected. "I don't just mean they were not chasing someone, I mean the spacing of the prints implies they were walking slowly. And look, this direction would end up with them hitting the stream."

"Which is not visible from above, so they cannot have come down for it," Lily reasoned back at him.

"True, but we still should not hang around here, just in case they come back," Beryl rumbled.

"Okay," she conceded, glad she didn't have to let herself be argued around just so that her fledglings would hear all of Beryl's implied reasoning. This discussion had just ended, he had won her over to his way of thinking with most of it left unsaid, but it would have needed to go on for a while yet if she had to justify her change in opinion to anyone else.

"I really do not think they came down to chase someone," Beryl said as they turned their backs on the crash site. "There wasn't the slightest hint of anyone but the Deathgripper coming down here, and it would make no sense for it to land away from its prey if it knew where to go. This is much more like how they have been following us."

"That does not make me feel good about our safety," Lily said, not really meaning it. She didn't feel all that threatened at the moment; this and the occasional distant roar were the only indications that they might still be in any danger at all. There was still a chance they would be caught, she wasn't letting her guard down, but there would be indications beforepaw, warning signs much more ominous than this one. So long as they kept moving, they would be okay.

"But it makes you feel better about the safety of your people?" Beryl asked hopefully.

"It does," she admitted. "A little."

"Then I'm glad I said it." He glanced back at her, his eyes meeting hers as they walked. "I think this could be good for you."

"Finding a crash site and then leaving it alone?" Lily asked. "Yes, it could be good. For both of us…" A thought occurred to her, and she hummed quietly. "That reminds me of something."

"Yes?"

"They brought the dog in to get my scent," she said. "Does that mean that they can track any light wing, or just me?" She would almost prefer it if they could only track her.

Beryl looked back again, this time with tilted ears and a confused expression. "We went over this when we were planning the departure, remember? Ember said it probably meant they could follow you easily, and discern your scent from other light wings, but they could get the scent of anyone else just by taking a dog into the valley."

Lily titled her head and thought about it. "No," she said after a moment, "I don't remember."

"Probably because you were tired even then," Beryl suggested. "It catches up to you eventually."

"Yes, but it was necessary," she rumbled.

"I'm not arguing that," he said amiably, "I am just saying that there are trade-offs. It seems not quite remembering the little things afterward is one of them. Keep that in mind for your next long planning session."

"I will," she chuffed. Things like that made him perhaps her favorite advisor. He didn't immediately leap to telling her not to do something, he just made sure she knew the consequences. He was sort of like Pyre in that, though at the same time absolutely nothing like Pyre, full of life and so relaxed.

She was supposed to be relaxing too. "I am going to go back to scenting for little trails," she declared. "And you should walk beside me, or behind me. Your scent is getting in the way." She could smell him even now.

"This is not the prey you are looking for," Beryl snorted, running around a few trees to come up beside her, flaring his wings and crouching down as if to hide from sight. His wing brushed her side as he posed, just for a moment before it jerked away, and he quickly put a little distance between them.

Lily shook her head, fed up with second-guessing his motivations. "Do you still remember me demanding you not even come close to making moves on me?" she asked bluntly.

"Yes…" Beryl eyed her cautiously. "Why? Have I overstepped?"

"No, you're understepping," she snorted. "Forget that. I am not going to snap at you the moment you inch past the line. If I do not like it, I will let you know."

"Because you are trying to be less uptight?" Beryl asked.

"I am relaxing," Lily said innocently, wondering whether the attraction she was hiding was hidden well enough. At the moment, she didn't think anything would give her away, but he had noticed her unusual dream that evening. He was clever, he could put two and two together. But some things were only obvious in retrospect, and Crystal had told her she wasn't obvious with her feelings even when she meant to be…

Lily sidestepped and leaned against him. "We're friends," she said. "If I am a little less touchy than most light wings, it's because there are some in my pack who would get the wrong idea far too easily." She wasn't quite sure whether that was true or not, but it was part of the truth at the very least, and the part that would put him at ease without committing her to a course of action.

"This is a very good start to relaxing," Beryl rumbled. "But I thought you did not want my scent distracting you?"

"Yes, true, back up," she chuffed, catching herself before she could do anything else. She was well past wondering what was getting into her, and onto wondering whether it was something she could control. Her body answered to her, and its many defects had taught her to push past pain and fear and exhaustion… but she didn't have much practice ignoring positive emotions, and attraction was totally new.

Beryl obligingly backed away, and Lily set her nose to the ground, sniffing deeply and pushing him out of her mind. She was going to smell the little prey, not think about Beryl or wonder if he was staring at her hindquarters like she enjoyed doing to him-

It really was a disease of the mind, unavoidable and corrupting her every thought. She almost spit a little ball of fire into the snowdrift in front of her. She would control herself.

O-O-O-O-O

Lily's stomach rumbled as she scented another little prey trail. "When you say these are not worth hunting, do you mean they are never worth hunting, or that they are not worth hunting when you are mostly full?" she asked hopefully. She didn't know what made the tantalizing scent that passed through the mud, leaving little splayed clawprints, but it smelled interesting.

"Never," Beryl said, squashing her hopes. "But you did good finding that one. That makes five since we found the crash site."

"Ten in a night, none of them worth following," Lily added. "That is good?"

"This forest is bare and mostly lifeless, so yes," Beryl confirmed. "I don't know why that is, either. Your people could not possibly have hunted this far out without you knowing about it. You're not responsible for the overhunting."

"Definitely not," she huffed, putting her head back down and moving on. "I would have noticed over the season-cycles." Pyre would have noticed, too. "What could have caused it?"

"Scarce food sources, maybe. I have not seen many berry bushes either." Beryl stalked off to the right and batted a paw at yet another green-blue bush. "These are everywhere, and they seem worthless."

"Certainly not edible," Lily rumbled. They did seem more plentiful than usual, though they were all losing their leaves now. She had assumed that was just her slightly altered state of mind picking them out of the undergrowth more thoroughly than normal. But if Beryl noticed it too, it had to be something more than warped perception.

"I don't know enough about plants and prey to say what's going on," Beryl decided.

"Better than guessing randomly with no knowledge to back yourself up," Lily hummed.

"It definitely is…" Beryl came back to walk at her side, and his wing brushed hers. Neither of them moved away, him because she had told him such things were fine, and her because she liked it.

She put her head down and tried to ignore the feelings for the umpteenth time. It was becoming clear that she was going to have to do something soon, either to stifle herself or to act on it. But she didn't know what.

Another prey scent came in at the edge of her nostril, trailing around in an indescribable way that led her to believe it was coming from something to her left. She turned away from Beryl to follow it, expecting another little trail through the mud, lined with stray fur or feathers.

Instead, she got a deep trio of circular holes in the mud, and a much stronger smell than any other prey. "Is this worth finding?" she asked expectantly, closing her eyes to focus on the smell. It wasn't like fish, none of the trails had been anything like fish, but it screamed of fresh, non-dragon blood, and something big enough to have a lot of it.

"This definitely is," Beryl purred, taking the lead. Lily followed him, for once distracted by something more alluring than his tail, though in a different way. "Okay, time to actually hunt. It's not eat or starve, not yet, so do not get too stressed."

"But there are stakes," Lily objected. "If we do not get this, you will have to go fishing at some point." That was a big risk, and she would much rather he not need to take it, especially not on her behalf.

"Like I said, it's not catch or starve," he repeated. "Don't overwork yourself. We're going to run now, but not too fast. Be ready to stop the moment I do."

"Understood," Lily huffed. They had been walking fast all night, and she was tired, but not to the same extent as so often recently, where she could barely move of her own accord. She could run for a while.

Beryl broke into a fluid lope, and Lily did her best to follow, though she felt less than graceful compared to him. The scent of the prey remained in her nostrils, driving her forward, and she found that she had little trouble following it. Moving off of the path it had taken was like having fish pulled out from under her nose; the few times she did go another way to avoid close-set trees, she immediately found it again afterward.

They ran for a short while, not long enough to tire her out to any meaningful degree, and then Beryl stopped without any warning.

"There's a big puddle ahead of us," he said quietly, backing up. Lily backed up with him, copying his every move in lieu of an actual explanation. "The prey is drinking from it. There are thorn bushes to the prey's right, and there is a snowdrift to its left. I want you to circle around to our right, its left, and hunker down by the snow. I'll scare it, and when it tries to flee, jump and dig your claws into it."

"I can do that," Lily huffed quietly. She immediately began creeping around the trees and bushes that apparently obscured the puddle. She couldn't see it, and had to all but crawl in order to not be seen, a huge white mass slinking through the dark forest, but she could hear occasional grunts and water splashes nearby.

She wished she had camouflaged herself, however imperfect it was. A moving blur had to be less noticeable than a stark-white dragon slinking around…

But there was no cry of alarm from the prey, so it didn't matter. She crouched down by the edge of the snowdrift as Beryl had suggested, inching her way forward until she could see the pond and the odd brown creature standing in it with its back to her.

She contemplated leaping out and grabbing it now, while it was oblivious, but Beryl probably had a reason for not suggesting that. He knew what they were doing, and she didn't. She remained still, ready to leap up and pounce on the narrow, horned creature. If she weren't so hungry, she might have cared about its appearance, but at the moment she just cared about what lay beneath that brown coat.

Beryl leaped out from hiding and the prey immediately bleated and bolted, its spindly legs propelling it through the snow. Lily leaped forward, surprised by its sudden speed despite waiting for exactly that, and drove it down against the base of a tree. It stopped moving before she even got her claws into it, and she stared at its long neck.

"They don't bend like that," Beryl supplied, coming up beside her to paw at its head, which flopped loosely at an obviously unhealthy angle. "Nice takedown."

Lily forced down a fleeting memory of Crystal's Sire and his similarly fatal injury, instead focusing on the here and now, as Beryl had told her to. She was standing in a dark forest, victorious in her first hunt, her prey under her paws.

She sank her teeth into one of the fat flanks and tore a chunk off, stripping the fur off with clumsy claws as she went. This part she knew, thanks to Beryl showing her with the prey he had brought the night before.

"It's good enough, but it's scrawny and alone," Beryl observed in between claiming his own portion and eating it. "That makes two over the course of our entire journey so far, both undersized."

"Could it be coincidence?" Lily asked. "One is random, two might be a coincidence. Three or more is a pattern."

"It's possible we're just in an unappealing part of the forest," Beryl conceded. He bit down, and bones cracked loudly, signalling the end of any long-winded discussion. They had more important things to do with their mouths.

Lily focused on filling her stomach, enjoying the meat while she could. It was strange and a little frightening to know that she couldn't be sure where her next meal would come from, but at the same time she knew she had Beryl, and now she knew the basics of hunting.

Hunting was good. She found a bone and snapped it between her paws to lick at the broken ends. There was something about the chase and the end that made her feel alive, independent. It was something she could do, and without her back hurting much at all. Running hurt, but so did walking, and she had not needed to run for very long.

They lingered there by the puddle, finishing off the still-warm kill in turns. When the last of the edible bits were gone, Beryl shoved the remainder off into the snow and covered it. "I think we can rest here for the day," he said casually, returning and laying on his side. "You don't want to run or walk anywhere right after a meal like that. That's one of the downsides to eating less frequently but more in a sitting."

"That, and getting fat," she snorted.

"You won't get fat," Beryl said seriously, arching his neck to look at her. "You might fill out a little, but that will be from the constant exercise, not eating a lot at once. And you are beautiful anyway."

Lily eyed him skeptically, and he stared back at her. "A little too blatant on the encouragement, there," she joked.

"I meant it," he said, before looking away again.

Lily huffed and settled down, her paws under her head. Something had to be done about this, and soon. A choice needed to be made, and her body was constantly pushing her toward one of the two available options. Even Beryl complimenting her was enough to get a reaction, however slight.

She let her eyes linger on his exposed underside, straining to master her feelings. She was not some moonstruck female who had just learned of males, she knew far too much about the things that came from attraction, though none of her first-paw knowledge was applicable here. It couldn't be; even thinking about Claw made her feel the opposite of what Beryl did.

She didn't like thinking about Claw, so she pushed him from her mind and eyed Beryl some more. He didn't notice, lying as he was. One eye to the ground and thus closed, and the other to the canopy, and the sky beyond. It didn't look comfortable, but he preferred lying that way for some reason, at least on this particular trip. She had not spied on him as he slept back in the valley, so she didn't know if he did it there.

He probably didn't; he had at least one enemy in the valley, Diora, and so wouldn't want to expose himself to whoever came around while he slept. Right now, his neck and chest and belly were all facing out at her, vulnerable. They moved in and out with every breath, shifting arrays of muscle covered by scale but nonetheless clearly defined, all the way down his underside and out into his tail.

Her heart quickened and a wet heat began to smolder down below, and she narrowed her eyes. She needed to be able to control that reaction, as it was the one most likely to give her away before she was ready to make a choice. If she couldn't…

If she couldn't, did that mean that the right choice was to pursue it? She did not immediately push the idea away. It was an attractive option, he was an attractive option, and likely open to her if she made her intentions clear. It was a risk, but not much of one, not in that way.

She wanted this. It was just a question of whether or not it was worth the risk of messing things up with him…

But she trusted him. He was smart and capable of not letting something like this get between them. If he didn't feel right about it, he would tell her so. And she wanted to find out what it was supposed to be like, what these feelings were meant to lead to.

Lily stood, her heart beating fast, and hesitated. Once she began, she couldn't change her mind and pretend she wasn't doing what she was obviously doing, that would just confuse Beryl and make things awkward. And she couldn't just jump on him, either, the very thought of assaulting him with something he wasn't expecting or allowing made her want to vomit.

"If you want to gnaw on a bone, go ahead," Beryl said casually. "I buried them to keep from attracting scavengers, but so long as you cover them up again it will be fine."

"I want something else," Lily said breathlessly. "I really do."

Beryl rolled onto his stomach and looked over at her. "What?" he asked.

Lily stalked upwind of him, not sure what she was supposed to say, and flicked her tail back and forth a bit. Her scent would probably speak for her… Maybe she was supposed to make herself look appealing too, but she was not an attractive light wing. That would probably just backfire, no matter how he might think she was appealing.

It might all backfire, he might not want her at all, but she was beyond the point of going back now. His eyes widened as her scent reached him, and she knew she couldn't pretend nothing was happening. She couldn't go back… and she dearly wanted to, for the long moment of silence that passed between them.

"You said no…" Beryl rumbled, staring at her.

"I'm no good with this sort of thing, I have no idea what I'm doing," Lily admitted. "But I want to know what I've missed out on. You make me want that."

"You do not have some plan going on here, do you?" Beryl asked, looking away from her. "Lily, trying to attract me is not acceptable in some clever scheme."

"It's not a scheme," Lily whined, shuffling her paws in helpless agitation. "If it was a scheme I would know what to do or say. I just don't think I can hide it any longer, and don't want to anyway."

Beryl breathed in deeply, his eyes returning to her. They were wide and open, but conflicted too. His ears wavered between standing upright and laying flat on his head, twitching erratically.

"We can't risk an egg," Beryl murmured, sounding so very confused, but also regretful… "I don't know what this is supposed to be, and you are not about to ask to be my mate."

"No, I…" Lily cast about and found the nearest blue-green bush. She didn't need it, but she needed a way to explain why eggs were not a problem, and she didn't want to talk about being barren. Her hindquarters were smoldering like a lit fire, and she just wanted to get past the confusion and find out whether he felt the same way she did.

"These bushes stop eggs for a moon-cycle," she said, before hastily swallowing a leaf, hollow act though it was. "Not a problem."

"Oh." Beryl walked toward her. "What… Do you really want this? You are not just pressing on even though it does not seem like such a good idea now?"

"I do," Lily confirmed. Her hesitation was gone, and it sounded like he was considering it… "Just… stop me if you do not feel right about this?"

"Okay." He leaned in and pressed his forehead against hers. "Same for you."

She purred heartily and ran her face along his chin and down his neck, giddy at the prospect of finally giving in to his allure. She had no clue what she was supposed to be doing, and instead had to lean into her impulses, the very things she always tried to control. Just this once, maybe it was better to act without thinking, however foreign that was to her.

If she could do that. Her thoughts were all over the place, and she felt strangely out of breath, but she didn't care. She let her gaze wander down his back, guided by her wants, a yearning to... Her body, the raging fire in her hindquarters, fuelling a desire for him to… to…

She startled a little as Beryl gently nuzzled her face, and then he gracefully lay on his side in front of her, the embodiment of relaxation, watching her with eyes that were at once understanding and inviting. She exhaled, feeling relieved, though she didn't inspect her brief hesitation too thoroughly; she was trying not to think, and certainly not about where that would lead.

She awkwardly rubbed her face on his chest, purring increasingly loudly at just how firm all that muscle really was, and then further down, along his side, strongly desiring to first know more about what she was getting herself into. Her tail curled around to bop at his nose, and he bit at the tip with toothless gums, pulling at it.

Neither of them knew what they were doing, just that they were doing something. They were lying beside each other now, facing opposite directions; she couldn't even see his face. He was rumbling deep in his chest, but for all she knew he was feeling terribly uncomfortable and just waiting for her to do something else.

She nuzzled his flank, breathing heavily and savoring his warm and intoxicating scent… then mustered her courage and gently nudged his hindleg aside to reveal something that put paid to her worries about whether he was enjoying her semi-random actions. She stared, suddenly feeling even more out of her element, but vindicated at the same time, and purred throatily as she satisfied her curiosity, adding pieces to a puzzle she had never before felt the need to complete. He shivered…

"This is good," he rumbled huskily. "I… You lead."

"I planned to," Lily purred breathlessly, laying her head on his flank. Then she thought about how that might sound, given her reputation, and wanted to take it back. "No, there was no plan, but I want to."

"It's okay," he said, twisting around so that they were facing each other again. "I get it. This is my first time, too. I don't know what I'm doing." He licked her across the face, and she responded in turn.

"It's working," Lily purred, nudging at his neck. "Roll over, please?" She had the overwhelming urge to not be on the bottom, to take charge and make sure this was good for both of them. She wasn't quite sure whether it worked like that, but she was going to find out.

Beryl purred at her and rolled onto his back without hesitation, his every movement open and inviting. He was strong, fit, a friendly face she knew. He trusted her, and she completely trusted him. She was not afraid.

She was not afraid, and she wanted him. She put a paw on his chest, then another, and walked up him. Then she eased herself down and joined them, and all of her thoughts flew away on the wings she no longer possessed, leaving her without a care in the world except the present moment. She could smell him under her, feel him, taste him as she panted against his muscular chest, and they fumbled and tested and found the rhythms that had them both stifling sounds in the quiet hum of the snowy forest.

O-O-O-O-O

Some time later, Lily lay on her side, her mind blissfully empty. Beryl lay opposite her, his paws resting on and under hers. They were both panting, and both happy with what had happened…

But all too soon, the bliss faded and her thoughts returned. She could see the same thing happening to Beryl, obvious most of all in the way he looked at her with increasing uncertainty.

Now, as much as she hated to put herself in a delicate position so soon after such a mind-altering experience, was just as important as what had just happened. This would be the conversation that defined or ruined what they had just begun.

"Pearl told me something, back when we were talking," Lily began, hoping to set the mood as something calm and understanding. "She said that mating wasn't just for making eggs, that it was enjoyable too. She said it because I didn't really get that at the time. Now I do."

"It was… but it usually happens between mates." Beryl huffed and looked past her. "I don't know what we just did, but you are not going to ask to be my mate."

"No," Lily confirmed. "Neither of us is ready or willing to make that choice. Right?" She certainly hoped she had interpreted his desires correctly. If she hadn't, this was about to go bad very fast.

"I was not… am not… I don't know." Beryl clutched one of her front paws between his. "This was good. I liked it. I like you. But you have things that need to be sorted out."

"Yes," she agreed. "Many things. But this, what we just did… I do not regret it."

"I certainly do not either," Beryl assured her. "I have had to stop myself from staring at you for so long… I tried not to think about you that way, but… the moment you said you felt the same way…"

"You hid it well," she huffed, wondering how many 'innocent' looks she had missed. Maybe not so many, some probably were innocent, and it was not as if she wasn't guilty of the same thing.

"So did you… When did you decide you liked me after all?" He scrunched his face up, apparently deep in thought. "I cannot tell, even looking back."

"Neither can I. It came slowly and I didn't have time to notice it." She huffed and nosed his chest. "But what we are now… not mates. I can't take a mate, not when I get back to the pack. There are problems with that. Big problems."

"I will take your word for it," Beryl hummed. "But we are not with the pack now."

"Not now," she agreed. "I want to do this again." She had hoped giving in would soothe her desires down to something manageable, and it still might, but it definitely hadn't rid her of them completely.

"No-scaled-not-prey have a term for a pair that is not a pair officially," Beryl told her. "Lovers. That sounds like what you want, though I do not think dragons do it."

"We can, though… Does it mean mating as we please, and being close, but only until we get back to the pack? And then being just friends again?" She didn't like that thought, but the pack was supposed to come first, and she wasn't going to let this get in the way of that. Somehow.

"Yes… It can also mean we meet in secret after we rejoin the pack," Beryl hummed. "Or not. I am not going to make you promise anything when neither of us knows what the future holds."

"Thank you," she purred. "I want this, and I do not want to ruin our friendship. The details can come when they are needed."

"That does not sound like how you usually do things," Beryl noted.

"I am trying to relax," she retorted. "That means not obsessing over what happens when we reach the pack. It also means doing what I want to do."

"And speaking of your wants…" He huffed quietly and paused for a moment before continuing. "Just to check, you are not just being with me because you have no other options right now?"

"What? No." She shook her head wildly. "You are my only option, the only one I like and trust enough. If it were anyone else out here with me, none of this would happen." She wasn't even sure where that particular worry had come from; her problem was that she had very exclusive standards, not that she lusted after every male with a pulse.

"Just checking," Beryl rumbled. "And that plant really does stop eggs?"

"It does," Lily said quietly. She contemplated telling him that it was unnecessary… But she didn't want to. It made her feel damaged, even more than her back did at the moment, and she didn't want to feel that way. Not when it didn't matter. "Eggs are not a worry," she concluded.

"No worries… except for the hunters maybe still coming after us." Beryl rolled away from her and sat up, looking around the brightening forest. "You sleep first. I'll wake you at midday to watch for me."

She hummed agreeably and remained where she was, tired and content. She didn't know what the future held, but she suspected it would now be much easier to relax and move forward.