A/N:
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!
Yes it is I, and I am still alive lol. Sorry again for the ultra late update. Very busy with the usual stuff (work, festivities, etc) but I'd be getting a whole week off from work starting tomorrow so I might be able to write more chapters during this time. I'm just getting back into writing as of now, so I might just be able to release just one more chapter before next Monday, but I'll try my best to make it two (after all I owe you guys A LOT).
I'm also very happy because I came back with some comments still expressing interest over the fic. I'm really, really sorry for updating so slow. Hopefully, I can finish the fic within this year. :)
This chapter's not proofread, so as always, please bear with me. I hope everything still makes sense.
Hope you guys have a great 2021!
"Serana! Let's go!" Sissel gleefully called as she ran to the main hall.
The vampiress gave her a tired sigh. "You really shouldn't be pushing yourself too much. We should practice at least every two days… not every day."
"But I'm fiiiine!" the little girl whined as she peered down yet another book Serana was holding.
It's been three days since Remus' departure, giving both Serana and Sissel ample time to get to know each other better. Gregor was off on another hunt and patrolling around the capital of Dawnstar. Jordis on the other hand was gone most of the day and would be back home just in time for supper because she has 'business in Dawnstar' which is why it was mostly just her and Sissel.
Sissel was always full of energy and never keeps her mouth shut. Serana wasn't one for talking but she couldn't help but be dragged on the child's whims. The vampiress was originally uncomfortable and anxious on how she's going to deal with the girl, but ultimately, she realized that there was nothing to worry about although Sissel turned out to be just a huge pain in the behind.
She's been helping her with her magicka control for two days straight.
Serana shot Sissel an unamused look to which the child responded with a pout of her own.
"Making that face isn't exactly helping your case, so cut that out." the vampiress coldly replied before carrying on with her book.
"Meanie."
Serana sighed again. "Today is a rest day and I won't have it any other way. Go pick up a book from that pile or something." She said, gesturing to the pile of books she brought to the main hall.
"Why is it always about books with you?" Sissel complained albeit doing as Serana instructed.
"I told you already…" Serana responded without looking away from her book, "…if you want to become a strong mage, you will need a lot of studying. A lot of studying means—"
"—A lot of reading. Yeah, yeah you already said that." Sissel interjected. "Fine, we'll do it your way. But promise you're gonna teach me tomorrow!"
Serana raised her eyes from reading once more and saw Sissel's pinky finger out. She shot the little girl a look and she was staring back at her intently, expecting she knows what she should do next.
The woman exhaled before reaching out and intertwining her own pinky to hers. "Fine, I promise. So, you better start reading a little bit longer today."
Sissel groaned in defiance but just nodded her head by the end of it.
An hour has passed and Sissel's sighing became more and more evident. This didn't seem to faze Serana one bit for she was too absorbed into the book.
"How did you and Remus meet?" Sissel suddenly asked. Serana was about to turn the page on her book, but she was immediately stunned by the question.
"I… well… he…" Serana started to stutter, unable to form a complete thought in her head, more so, coherent words from her mouth. "He… Uhh… right… He saved my life."
"How so?" Sissel followed up.
"He rescued me from a very dark place."
"A… dark place?"
Serana paused. "I initially meant that as a figure of speech, but now that I think about it… it applies in the literal sense, too." She chuckled.
"Figure… of speech? I don't get it…" Sissel scratched her head while giving Serana a confused look.
The vampiress gave her a brief look before smirking. "You wouldn't understand, that's why I'm telling you to read more."
Sissel groaned while Serana stifled in laughter. There were a few minutes of silence as both of them immersed themselves in reading (in Sissel's case, tried) but it wasn't long until the runt asked another question.
"How long have you been together?"
"Have you finished reading yet?" Serana shot back, completely ignoring the question.
Where is she pulling these questions from anyway?
"Well, no…" the little girl answered, briefly falling under Serana's misdirection. However, she seemed a little too eager to know more about her relationship with Remus.
"Just how did he save you?"
"He found me in some dank and dark cave and got me out of there. End of story." Serana tried to pass it off as something disinteresting but realized that her answer immediately backfired – the very moment she saw the girl's eyes light up in curiosity.
"A cave? What happened then?"
"It wasn't really much."
"Come on, tell me!" The girl's huge smile was blinding.
Why won't she stay still and read her book in silence?
Serana exhaled loudly before saying, "Look, I don't have much to say. Remus and I have been traveling together because of a common goal – and that's that."
Of course it wasn't just 'that's that', Serana just wanted this uncomfortable conversation to be over. She was used to keeping talking to a minimum (Remus was a special case if she thinks about it), but there was something about the little girl that urged – no – gave her the feeling of not having the choice but to answer.
Suddenly, Sissel dropped a question. "How long's been gone… three days? Do you miss him?"
A pause.
Serana thought of an answer.
In all honesty, the past three days hasn't been easy. While it was true that she was surrounded by all the books she can read, it hasn't even been a week and she's already starting to feel lonely.
Moreover, she'd find herself lying down the bed every night, despite not being able to sleep because of her vampiric blood. She'd blankly stare off at the ceiling for hours before burying her head on a pillow. She'd realize that there were traces of Remus' smell on the sheets and she'd indulge herself by getting a whiff – only to realize that it was very creepy of her and vowed to herself not to do it again. Still, she'd subconsciously do it once more the following night upon climbing on the bed.
"Serana?" The little girl chimed, breaking Serana from her thoughts.
"W-What?"
"Do you miss him?"
Without responding, Serana closed her book and tossed it on the pile as Sissel watched on.
"You know what…" the vampiress whispered, "…maybe we should train after all."
"Yaaaaaaay!" Sissel screamed, not even bothering to hide her excitement. "I'm going to get ready! I'll meet you outside, okay?" The little girl laughed as she ran towards her room.
Serana sighed. It was the only way she'd get Sissel off her case. She'd probably have to find a way to trick her into doing something different and pass it off as training since she still has to recover her magicka.
Children… they're tedious work.
Too many questions… and they're not sensitive enough when asking them.
But if she's to answer Sissel's question…
Yes… she does miss him.
Remus had mixed feelings the moment he left the Thieves' Guild Cistern. He wasn't sure what to feel after everything that has transpired, especially when he relayed his last wish.
It was a very long discussion between the five of them – most were not welcome to the idea of him leaving, especially Karliah, who was inherited the obligation he was carrying. The woman was the savior of his life at one point, back when he was betrayed by Mercer. But, most importantly, she was the only one she can trust with the job – the only other person he considers to be a thief in equal footing with him, maybe even better.
In the end, they all managed to agree with all of his terms, although Delvin was extremely unhappy that he almost had to walk out.
"I joined the Guild almost ten years ago and did everything for it with no questions asked – I almost died for it even! Stole all those trophies in that damned vault and even brought this stinking sewer back to its former feet! I paid you one last good tribute and now, I bring you this crown – a lost paragon which has never been found for the last two eras. I think, I've done enough. I have the right to call it quits, don't you think?"
Remus remembered how he raised his voice to say these things – the last nail to the coffin of him being the Guild Master. None of the four spoke against him – their eyes quick to avert his gaze and dropped down the floor for they all knew there is truth in his words.
By the end of it all, there weren't any subjections as the rest silently agreed… except for one.
"Why… why would you leave?" Karliah asked.
Remus looked at her in the eye for a good few seconds before sighing and giving her a weak smile.
"You probably know the answer."
She probably would – after all she's gone through just for the sake of giving Gallus his peace.
He's doing the same – sacrificing this connection as a step closer to normalcy, something he thinks he must have if he's going to be a part of her life.
That normal life he wanted her to have.
He took a deep breath of Riften's fresh air before exhaling into a sigh. He almost forgets how the city reeked of corruption because of its very nice climate – it's almost as if the autumn season never ends.
Remus enjoyed the cold midnight air as he leaned over the railings, peering over Lake Honrich. He suddenly felt a huge blanket of relief over him, realizing a little too late that he'd really severed ties with the Thieves' Guild.
They were his friends in the business, but they're still thieves who either loved coin or maybe, just in it for the thrill. It'd be in his best interest if he just left.
Remus sighed once more. He passed yet another ordeal, but thinking back, he should be thankful as things with the Guild was easier than what went down with the Dark Brotherhood before...
After contemplating on what he'll do next, he donned his hood before making his way back to the stables.
It's midnight. Vampires are probably lurking about.
But Remus was feeling confident with what just transpired. Aside from that, the Rift is widely covered by the Dawnguard patrols.
He should hurry… to his next bargain.
The man smirked under his hood as he imagined Isran's face seeing his mug when he least expects it.
The Dawnguard's defenses have been bolstered even further by the time he got back there. There were even more guards on the night shift, and the place was lit up by a lot of torches and lanterns.
Since he was wearing a suspicious-looking hooded armor, he was immediately blocked off by the guards. He raised his hands in apparent submission explaining that he's also part of the Dawnguard. Instead of granting him access, he was barraged with even more questions.
It may be a little annoying, but Remus was glad they increased the level of security. Remus new that they'd eventually escort him inside for further investigation, but he wanted to meet Isran as soon as possible – and he knew just what to do.
The moment his hood fell, so did their jaws. They scrambled out of his way, staring as he passed by.
No one… and I mean no one should know that I'm working with you.
That's what Remus' terms when he first talked to Isran about joining Fort Dawnguard.
To think that the person who will break these terms were none other than himself because of his series of carelessness – breaking his incognito status during the defense of Morthal and Dawnstar, not even counting having to dispatch of the dragon that attacked Ivarstead, all Remus could do was sigh as he entered Fort Dawnguard.
He expected no one around the halls but surprisingly, there were even rounds of guards inside. It was certainly impressive.
He didn't have his hood on when he entered and made way for Isran's room which is why he didn't have any problems with the guards inside – some of them even stood into attention the moment they laid their eyes on him.
It was past midnight, but he stood in front of Isran's quarters. He knew that Isran wouldn't dare sleep during the dead of the night.
He saw the Dawnguard leader on the tactical table, completely fixated on the pieces as if in deep thought.
"Isran." Remus called.
The man was suddenly jolted from his thoughts and turned around. As soon as he saw that it was Remus, he quickly covered the tactical table with the lid.
"You're back earlier than I expected." Isran calmly answered.
The way he was quick to cover up the Dawnguard strategy was sketchy, but Remus paid it no heed. As much as the man was easy to dislike, he knew full well what he's doing.
"I suppose you have news for me?" His tone remained calm which was surprising because Isran had always wanted immediate results. In this regard, he was expecting more of, "Where's the bow? Do you have it?" or something along those lines.
"That, I do." Remus briefly replied before his hand crackled with dark crimson energy before conjuring the bow.
Isran's eyes widened in awe as he gaped at the weapon's unearthly glow.
"That's—" he was obviously at a lost for words.
"Auriel's bow."
"I-I've heard it described in tales, but I could never have imagined its beauty. But how—"
Remus raised his eyes and met Isran's gaze. He couldn't make out the man's expression, but he was certainly looking at him intently.
"What?" Remus finally broke.
"Hm?" Isran grunted as if pulled from his thoughts. "Ah, no. It was nothing." He stared at the bow once more.
Remus scratched his head. Isran's attitude is… confusing. He was a little used to him a little too hot-headed but in all honesty, he could make do without the booming voice every time.
"Still, the battle is yet to be won as long as Harkon walks Tamriel." Isran muttered, his eyes still fixated on the bow. "What do you plan on doing now?"
Remus' eyes widened in surprise as he let the bow dissipate. "What? You're asking me?"
"That I am."
Remus was definitely taken aback. Isran? The man who always wanted his instructions followed? Asking him what to do?
He was prepared for negotiations, but he definitely did not expect this.
"I'd have the Jarls west of Skyrim bolster the Dawnguard's ranks even further. Most of the Jarls are aligned with the Empire, I'd have Tullius convince them." Remus started whispering to himself, "Have to write my housecarls some letters…"
"Hm. That's the Dragonborn for you."
Remus' ears rang upon hearing Isran say this. "…What brought that up?"
"No, it is nothing. I just thought you're pretty friendly with the Imperials."
"I'm not siding with anyone in this war. But I must admit I'm no fan of Ulfric. It just so happens the Imperials are easier to talk to." Remus was a little distracted but chose to let it pass. "Anyway, I really don't have a concrete plan. I was going to think about it once we've rallied enough men from the Jarls but… we could probably all meet at the shores near Northwatch Keep before riding for the Castle—"
"No. We'll gather our forces at Dawnstar."
Remus raised a brow. "Dawnstar? Why Dawnstar?"
Without batting an eyelid Isran continued to explain, "We'd be attacking from there. They'd expect us to arrive from the direction where they've set their jetty. Can't do that. Besides, if we manage to gather a lot of forces and made camp at the shores, we'd be easier to spy. Or be ambushed even."
It's a valid point, Remus thought. Charging in with boats is a surefire way to get killed with their ballistae. Remus wasn't very sure if the siege weapons work upon spotting them the first time he set foot at the island, but it'll be safer in their part to assume they do.
"You knew about the ballistae?" he asked.
"That's what the scouts reported. We had a lot of information coming in while you were gone."
"Isn't that great?" Remus inquired, noticing that Isran's expression didn't even change at the slightest.
"No." the Redguard briefly answered. "Remember our anonymous informant?"
"That I do. What about it?"
"Have you noticed… anything different out there? Other than the vampires?"
Remus placed a finger on his chin as he thought of an answer, "I'm not sure. The way people took the vampire threat seriously."
Isran expressed a heavy sigh before grunting. "No. The bandits."
Remus thought back, realizing that the presence of bandits in Skyrim as of late has been very low. Most of the time while traveling from a while back, he'd be blocked by at least three highway men. But the most recent bandit encounter would be back on their way to Windhelm.
And that was more than a month ago.
"The informant reported a number of people continuously using the jetty on their way… somewhere. Presumably, to Castle Volkihar."
Remus' eyes slowly widened in horror, "Wait, are you saying—"
"—I'm saying they're enthralled. We might be met by an army… other than the combined forces of all vampires in Skyrim."
This sent shivers up Remus' spine. "Have you guys confirmed anything?"
"No…" Isran's eyes went grim. "They were supposed to… but none ever returned. I sent another party to find them but…"
There was silence – none of them wanted to speak about it anymore.
Who was it? The Nightmasters who kept on trying to kill him?
"Just how much do you trust this informant?" Remus asked, crossing his arms.
"Very much so. We managed to clear out camps and prevent attacks around the holds east of Skyrim." Isran responded before raising his eyes to meet Remus'. "Of course, other than that blunder in Dawnstar, I haven't really commended you for that…"
Remus' eyes grew sharp. "No need. What you need to do is to stop sending out scouts at Castle Volkihar. It's—"
"Dangerous. I know. Already done. I've re-established our forces to focus on patrolling on our borders. Especially around east of Skyrim." Isran eyed Remus. "You've already mentioned this earlier, but I trust you know your part in keeping the west safe."
Remus nodded.
"Good." Isran sighed. Turning his back against him, he spoke. "If there's nothing more, you could leave."
That can't be right, Remus thought. Blinking a couple of times, he asked again. "Sorry?"
"I said if there's nothing more, you could leave."
"That's it? No more additional tasks?"
"We have the bow because of your endeavors. I trust you won't lose it… not after all… that." He muttered, probably referring to how he conjured and reverse-conjured the bow earlier.
"Overall, we shouldn't act rashly. We're not going to attack until we've mustered enough forces… we should at least try to minimize the number of casualties. I'll ask for you if we need you."
"And how are you going to do that?"
There was a short silence before Isran replied. "I have my ways."
Remus just couldn't comprehend what was going on anymore. He came here to use the bow as a key to a bargain to give him more time to himself (in truth, with Serana), but he was granted what he wanted… without a heated exchange.
"Alright…? I'll be on my way then… I'll be at Heljarchen Hall, near Whiterun Hold if you need me."
There was no answer, so Remus decided to walk out of the room.
But before making his exit, he heard Isran ask, "Where's the girl?"
Remus was a little surprised by the man's genuine question. This was the first time he asked about the vampiress, moreover, refer to her without as much as animosity.
"Somewhere safe." He replied. He'd expected Isran to retort with another jab regarding Serana but there was nothing.
Suddenly the Dawnguard leader cleared his throat. "I am… truly glad… the bow is in our hands. I never really had the chance to say this but… I am very thankful. For everything. It's been an honor working with you."
Remus felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. "Gross. You're creeping me out."
"What did I say?" Isran suddenly raised his voice, startling Remus. Still, he gave the Dawnguard leader a cocky grin.
"That's more like it. It's pretty damn weird when you're being nice."
Isran muttered under his breath. "I know when to express my gratitude. It may be a little late… but you have mine, Dragonborn."
"You're really being weird…" Remus commented in distaste.
Still, he found this Isran… refreshing? This is probably the first time he actually made a proper gesture of appreciation.
"I'm… gonna go. If something comes up, you know where to find me."
"I do. Carry on now."
Remus really found it strange how Isran acted but he donned on his hood before slightly waving a hand to bid him farewell.
The Dawnguard leader watched on as the man disappeared behind the door.
As he did, he remembered a conversation that happened a week earlier.
Isran felt cold sweat breaking off his forehead as he looked over the plans laid before him.
"Are… are you really sure about this? The preparation for this must be tedious… not to mention expensive… The Dawnguard isn't rich."
"We'll shoulder the costs. The Thane wouldn't mind for it's a good cause. I'm sure he's keen on giving the order once he's back, but I'd rather do it in advance. The earlier… the better. Besides, we're yet to meet again." The man in front of him, Valdimar, answered. During this date, Remus and Serana were on a quest at Ancestor Glade.
Isran previously received a letter from him saying he wanted to talk about the Dawnguard and its endeavors with the Thane. They continued to communicate through couriers… until today, when he marched inside the Fort to present him plans of an assault.
He knew about the Arcane Blacksmith. After all, he was famous among the Vigilants of Stendarr primarily because of his knowledge on crafting various weapons specialized on dealing with the Daedra. The weapons of all the leaders at the Hall of the Vigilant had their weapons crafted by none other than him.
Aside from being an exceptional blacksmith, there's also word that he was a powerful battlemage. News about him leaving the College of Winterhold were one of the talks among the Vigilants of Stendarr, when he was still a member.
Who would've thought he'd end up becoming one of the Dragonborn's Housecarls years later.
"So, it's settled then? The plan?" the old blacksmith asked.
Isran looked over the tactical table once more. This plan was better than what he originally had in mind, but in all fairness, he didn't take into account that they'd be able to sail with ships from Dawnstar.
"For now, there are no problems." Isran eyed Valdimar. "Are you also the anonymous sender who's been occasionally tipping us on vampire movement?"
Valdimar raised a brow in confusion. "No…? What are you talking about?"
"No, nevermind." Isran replied. "If I may ask, why are you going this far?"
"Isn't it obvious? I want my Thane to succeed." Valdimar answered nonchalantly with his arms crossed.
"Does he know about this?"
"I wouldn't be asking you if he was here prior to my visit if he did." The old man stroked his beard. "In days past, he'd probably know right away. Still, he's been slipping up recently… the mysterious dragonslayer at Ivarstead… and rumors of the Dragonborn defending the city of Morthal... hiding from the world my arse. There's a good chance he doesn't know that us housecarls are already on the move."
Valdimar sighed before slightly smiling. "Although, I can't help but think that it's probably better this way."
Isran's face twitched. "How is slipping up for the better?"
The housecarl stared at him intently for a few seconds before finally giving his answer. "It makes him more human."
"I'm not sure I understand."
The man heaved a sigh. "You've no notion who he actually is, don't you?"
"He's Dragonborn, I know that much." Isran answered firmly.
The housecarl laughed sardonically. "Of course, you're supposed to know that much. What I meant is you don't know who and how he really is. What being the Dragonborn really means." He opened a wineskin and took a chug. "If I'm to infer based on what's going on here and what I've heard from your men, you're giving him orders as if he's one of your soldiers. Probably treating him like cowdung like the rest of them if he didn't give results properly."
"Dragonborn or nay, he must follow orders if he's to—"
"You don't have to explain yourself. I'm grateful that you're treating him like anyone else." He took down another chug before giving Isran a sharp look. "Still, let me tell you something about him, might save your life when things get a little heated…"
"Save my life?" Isran scoffed in disbelief.
The housecarl closed his wineskin and approached Isran before speaking to him closely, "You've been gone for a long time, before your return to build the Dawnguard, Isran. Do not be fooled with just the rumors and what you've seen. In a way he's changed from who he was before. The Remus you know and the Remus I know is nowhere as close as you may think."
Isran stared back at the housecarl right in the eye.
He's dead serious.
"You better believe me when I say this: if you don't want any trouble when things get heated or does not go according to plan – Do. Not. Get in his way."
Suddenly, Valdimar's expression changed into a calm one before smiling ear to ear and giving him a light punch on the chest. "Or you know, maybe treat him with a little respect. But just a little." he added, gesturing with his fingers.
He continued, "Same with the others, too. Afterall, they're risking their necks out there… for this cause you started. In any case, if you and Remus find yourselves in a slight disagreement… put your faith in him a little. He knows what he's doing."
He tapped him lightly on the shoulder before donning cloak as he prepared to leave. But as he placed his hand on the door handle, he asked yet another question without turning his head back, "Say, what does it take to kill a god?"
"To kill… a god?"
The housecarl chuckled. "No, nothing. Just something to think about." He turned his head before giving Isran a small smile. "We'll talk again… soon."
As he thought back, the last part of his talk with Valdimar made little to no sense. But strangely enough, it put things into perspective.
Isran had always thought that Remus being Dragonborn only meant that he was stronger than the average man, thus, he proved extremely useful in the field.
But thinking about things now, his very presence has been a large contributor in their recent success. The Dawnguard prior to his arrival, were basically sitting ducks waiting to be wiped off by a huge vampire force. In addition, he wouldn't have been given the chance to fortify their base of operations if he wasn't out there. The prophecy… Auriel's bow… everything wouldn't have made sense.
He probably would've died trying to resist the vampire threat with a puny force if it weren't for his intervention.
Say, what does it take to kill a god?
A strange question to ask, but after seeing Remus again, he thinks he knew what Valdimar was trying to say – rather, trying to remind him of.
Isran cupped his head with his hand, realizing he was too absorbed into rebuilding the Dawnguard that he forgot
The Remus you know and the Remus I know is nowhere as close as you may think.
Isran sat on his wooden chair as he calmly stared at the hearth.
While the Dawnguard leader was slowly realizing the terrifying power a Dragonborn holds and how much he is indebted to it, that very same Dragonborn is snickering to himself in excitement as his mind's already set for his home at Heljarchen Hall.
