"Dare I ask, how did the wedding go?" Finn asked once Gabriela and Timoteo were eating their tacos at the dinner table, out of earshot.
"It was beachy," Pairs replied shortly, recalling the beachfront hotel and seashell centerpieces. "Other than that tolerable, I guess," she said. She had succeeded fairly well at ignoring the fact that the way Doyle had changed in the past years felt like deceit, and the event was simply the climax of that. She didn't love Doyle anymore, but she hated the idea that someone could in fact change that much, almost turning into a different person.
"How did the kids take it?" Finn continued, finishing up a bite of fish taco.
"They were glad to see their dad, sceptical of Jessica, as expected. But they'll have the summer to get to know her. I don't like it but I don't really have a say in it now that it is official. The nanny will go with them at least, so they'll have another familiar face around. I guess it's a good thing children are resilient," she said, opening a can of La Croix.
"I was worried it might have been a little much for them that I showed up, hence the text. You could have declined. I just really wanted to see you," he commented, feeling a little selfish.
"I didn't want to decline, I missed you. And I think after the spectacle Doyle pulled, I think a kiss won't shake them. But don't take it the wrong way, but when it comes to anything else. I aim to ease them into it. Losing their dad to Hollywood was bad enough, I don't want them to have to go through that again," Paris explained, after taking a sip.
"I get it. I'd do the same if I were you. My difference is that Leah doesn't really register stuff like that yet and Rory is fairly close by. And well recently Leah has probably spent more time with me anyways, she's been working a lot," Finn replied .
"Rory's really committed, isn't she? I hope she is not overdoing it. Sometimes people with depression or history of it compensate the wrong way. I'll try to talk to her," Paris wondered.
"I don't really know what is going on in her head these days. I know that Logan had another press incident and she has the bodyguards sitting around again. It can't be easy," Finn added, taking another bite.
"I hadn't heard," Paris said, surprisedly.
"They had some photos of Logan with some blonde in London. Apparently innocent but with insinuating accompanied text," Finn explained.
"I really should call her. Or maybe I'll just go visit, the nanny should be coming over soon" she said. Paris knew her limits well by now. While she adored her kids, there was only so much time alone with them she knew she could handle without turning bitter and cranky. A nanny to her was like a word of endearment, like a grandmother or favourite aunt taking care of her kids. She had adored her own, and this way she felt she supplemented herself the best way she knew how.
Paris showed up at Rory's driveway with a bucket of ice cream, having to explain to Marcus who she was.
"How many paparazzis you know that carry ice cream?" she huffed at Marcus, as Rory peeked through her front door at the commotion.
"Sorry, Marcus. Paris is fine," Rory called apologetically.
"Paris, I wasn't expecting you!" Rory added.
"That's quite a greeting, Ms. Manners," Paris scolded.
"So what brings you by, everything went well in California?" Rory asked, closing the door behind them.
"Annoyingly sunny, I still have sand in my shoes, but other than that I survived. Finn was sweet though, picked us up at the airport as a surprise," she shared.
"He's good like that," Rory agreed. Finn was indeed a spontaneous romantic.
"Who is good like that?" Logan asked, hugging Rory from behind.
"Finn actually," Rory said apologetically
"Oh, now I'm offended," he said. "Is this some secret Finn fanclub meeting? Should I make myself scarce?" he said, noting the large bucket of ice cream.
"I'd love it if you could keep an eye on Leah for a bit, so we can talk," Paris suggested practically, being a bit surprised to see Logan and Rory interacting effortlessly after those pictures had surfaced.
"Something serious?" Rory asked quietly.
"Come on," Paris said, leading her into the sunroom, which at that point was more like a darkroom, with a dim floor lamp and a rotang couch, and closing the glass door behind her.
"What is going on?" Rory asked, taking a seat and opening the ice cream bucket
"I see Logan's little snapshot did not scratch the surface?" she asked, handing Rory a spoon.
"Oh that. Of course it wasn't nice to see or read, but I trust him. We did talk," she confirmed, taking a bite of ice cream.
"Good," Paris sighed.
"Are you still seeing Dr. Burg?" Paris asked after a few spoonfuls.
"Roughly every two weeks," Rory replied, looking at her questioningly.
"That's good. What does he think, does he think you´re in the clear? Well I guess he wouldn't tell you that exactly, but does he think you are doing enough?" she inquired.
"As far as I know... It sort of precautionary at this point," Rory explained, having just taken a bite that was a little too cold.
"I am just worried about you. I know your schedule has been all over the place, and the stress from the press, it can't be easy," she replied.
"Well that's what the schedule is when you try to study and work at the same time. You know how it is. You're as good as the original Stakhanovite yourself," Rory stated.
"Yes but the question is if you are doing it for the right reasons." Paris said, glancing a look through the glass door towards Logan who was sitting on the floor playing with Leah.
"I am studying because I want to get my degree and I am working because I need to and it was part of the deal," Rory explained plainly.
"You keep saying that," Paris reflected. Rory had more choices open to her than she admitted, whether she really didn't understand them or want to grasp them, like a horse with blinders, was another matter.
"It is what it is," she sighed.
"If you believe that, then fine. Just I hope you are not using it as an excuse or as a substitute or something," Paris said, digging herself a large spoonful.
"An excuse for what?" Rory asked, looking at her.
Paris gave her a meaningful look.
"You mean Leah?" she asked.
"It shouldn't be like this. You should want to spend time with her, not want to work, especially if the work is mediocre, you've told me yourself. I'd understand it if you were working on your own book or something. And you keep saying you don't have a choice, but you do," Paris added glancing once again towards Logan.
"It's not like that," she explained. She had indeed spent little time with Leah the past few weeks, but she also knew that on several occasions she had felt she needed to spend time with her. But what she wasn't sure about was her inner motive.
"Just think about it, talk to dr. Burg about it," Paris suggested, holding up her spon.
"So, what did team-Finn agree to?" Logan laughed, as Paris left for the evening.
"He wasn't mentioned," Rory replied plainly.
"Everything okay?" he inquired, seeing from Rory's face that her mind was otherwise occupied.
Rory scraped the bottom of the ice cream bucket empty, eating the last spoonful of liquid, before throwing the container out. She didn't know what to say.
"Talk to me Rory, I'm here," Logan insisted.
"She was worried about me working too much," she finally explained.
"Does she have a reason to be?" he asked.
"She basically questioned if I was doing all of it for the right reasons. I've missing out on time with Leah recently too," she sighed.
"So why are you doing it?" Logan asked, glancing down at leah who was playing with some wooden blocks.
"I began because it felt right, something that just flew out of me, and then everything followed that thought - now it's just like I am going through the motions. I go to class, I prep my research, and I work because it was part of the deal. I keep trying to prove myself, pushing myself," she explained. She knew that part of it was also the fact that she didn't have anybody close at school. Without the human attachments she'd had during Yale the first time around, Yale now felt hollow and cold.
"Who are you proving yourself to?" Logan asked.
"Myself I guess, I'm not sure. I'll try to bring it up with dr. Burg next week.
"You haven't told me you're still seeing him," Logan said, surprisedly.
"Sorry, I haven't, it's just been a few times. I just wanted to prepare myself," she explained.
"Prepare for what?" he asked.
"The idea of another kid was making me anxious, I figured it was better to talk about it before we came to that bridge," she shared, feeling like a burden had lifted. She knew that Logan knew it was a gentle subject, but they hadn't really talked about it since.
"Oh, Ace," he said, moving close to her and wrapping his hands around her, hugging her. The last thing he wanted to do was cause her unwelcome feelings, and he certainly didn't want to push. The idea of his fiance seeking help so that they might some day in the distant future consider having a child of their own, was already a noble action. She was trying, she was trying for him.
