The Green Faced - Eyed - Monster

He had tried to ignore Cordelia arriving at work in a flash convertible with a handsome man ... and when he couldn't do that, he had tried to find out who the man was without letting his jealousy show … and when he couldn't do that - that's when he started trying to undermine her date.

Which was wrong of him. He knew that. It was petty and beneath him. And sure enough, the universe slapped him right down into the dirt for it.

He questioned whether it was safe to go out with a man she had literally just met - and what did she say in reply? He was human - not a monster. And how did she describe monsters? Green skin and red eyes.

Green skin and red eyes.

Yeah - he'd walked straight into that one. And Cordelia had managed to tell him exactly what she thought of him without even realising it. And now all he could do was miserably nurse the hurt and wish he had kept his mouth shut.

...

He spent the rest of the day and the whole of the next one moping around the office, feeling sorry for himself. Cordelia remained oblivious.

And then she had gone back home to get ready, and he found he just couldn't take it anymore and had gone into Angel to beg him to go out somewhere, do something - be anywhere but in the office - so he could take his mind off Cordelia and …

'My incredibly more wealthy than you prince?' She appeared behind him, dressed for her date - looking amazing. He would never be able to take her somewhere where she would need to dress up like that.

'You know just because he's got money doesn't mean he can make you happy,' he said. Though Cordelia loved money, that was exactly what would make her happy.

'I'll have you know Pierce has a lot more than money! He has a home in Montecito, and Mercedes CLK 320 and a place in the hills with a lap pool.'

He pulled a disapproving face at her, 'well, when you put it that way…'

There was the sound of the front door to the office opening and Cordy glanced behind her. Her date was here. With a parting shot, she abandoned her coworkers and went out to move on up.

Doyle and Angel glanced at each other and followed her out before she could leave.

And there he was. The rich, handsome, tall, human man that was taking Cordelia out to dinner. He was everything that Doyle was not. He was everything that Cordelia deserved.

Doyle was kidding himself if he thought he was ever going to stand a chance with her. This was what she wanted. And Doyle just couldn't measure up. Not just in inches - though that was a factor, and not just in wallet size - although the difference there was insurmountable … but if he wanted to be close to Cordy then he would have to tell her about his demon half. And what had she said about demons? That she didn't go out with ones with green skin and red eyes.

Green skin and red eyes.

Yep. His chances were worse than zero.