Settled in the sunshine of the courtyard, I enjoyed the bustle of activity around me, whilst safe in the knowledge that I didn't have any current responsibilities or risk of surprise attack. It was relaxing to be around familiar faces and to have the time to reflect on my feelings. My time with Arlo gave me little time to think and I relished in the opportunity to let my guard down for a while. I jumped at the arrival of Bellamy, who smiled warmly down at me.
"There you are, Trouble. So, I managed to get access to the training space for this afternoon and the trainees have been told that you're offering a session. They're actually pretty pumped. You still feel good enough to instruct?" He investigated with an obvious enthusiasm in his manner and I raised my brows in surprise. Immediately I regretted not discussing a time frame when I'd agreed to this favour and took a moment to gather my words.
"I didn't expect to be doing that today, but...sure, I can do it for you." I answered with a forced smile and mentally tried to assure myself that I was able to teach despite the dull ache in my ribs. He looked momentarily concerned as he examined my face and stepped closer to place a hand on my arm in a protective gesture.
"Are you sure? You don't have to do it if you're in too much pain." He enquired with his brows knitted tightly together and I could tell that he was analysing me for any signs of weakness that I might be burying. I shook my head in defiance and hoped that my well-practiced in control act would be enough to fool him. "Alright. You'll be training with me, so don't worry about getting hurt." He revealed in a tone that he clearly intended to be reassuring and I couldn't help a wry smile at his plan.
"Aww, that's sweet. You didn't want me beating the snot out of anyone else, huh?" I taunted deviously and his brows shot up in surprise at my brazen attitude. "So selfless." I teased with a playful prod at his ribs that caused him to flinch reactively and he scoffed with a subtle fondness in his eyes as he shook his head at me.
"Very funny." He commented with his charmingly wonky smile that made my heart leap and I basked in the warmth of our banter. It was refreshing to indulge in flirtatious teasing after such intensity with Arlo and the contrast only increased my appreciation of my relationship with Bellamy. His eyes grew serious as he viewed me and I recognised a genuine worry in his posture as he cleared his throat to speak again. "You're teaching them to fight someone bigger, especially men. Did you honestly think that I was gonna risk any man in this camp hurting you?" He detailed with just a hint of aggression in his voice as he glanced around us as if analysing for any potential threats and I chuckled at his protectiveness. It was entirely unnecessary but I was flattered by his determination to shield me from any harm; it was frustratingly romantic.
"Well, you just make sure you don't go easy on me, alright? They need to learn and they can't do that if my assistant is too afraid of injuring me to properly participate. Think you can do that?" I probed with a brow raised at him in suspicion and he fidgeted on the spot in a display of discomfort that he tried unsuccessfully to hide behind a forced display of confidence.
"Sure." He answered firmly and I shook my head at him in disbelief. I could already recognise that he was reluctant at this suggestion and my mind began racing with all of the potential ways in which this could be disastrous for our relationship. I felt a panicked tug in my chest that screamed to rescind my offer and as I met his eyes, I knew that he could sense my unease. "Don't worry Inds. I'll do whatever you need to teach them. Now come on, we should get there early to set up." He excused before encouraging me to follow him and I quashed the feelings of dread that he would be overly gentle with me.
We entered a space that Bellamy had clearly been using for guard training for a while and set up soft items to break the fall to the ground, amongst other methods. When people began to enter, I was stunned at the number of trainees who had turned up for me and found myself wracking my brain for ideas. I wished that we'd had the time to practice together, so that I had a course prepared for them but quickly realised that Bellamy was likely counting on my impulsivity. I was relieved when he took the lead to address the gathered crowd and instructed them to pair up to practice their usual drills so that I could observe the technique that they were currently using.
I noticed that much of the methods that they had been taught depended on core strength and easily understood why the females of the trainee guard had expressed concern for this. Instructors that were built like Lincoln and Bellamy were clearly used to having superior strength, but for the average female in our camp such as myself, this was not something that we could rely on. I worried that if they were to come into contact with grounders, who fought viciously, or a well trained force such as the guards of Mount Weather, these manoeuvres would be insufficient. Mentally, I scanned through the memories of my own experiences in an effort to uncover specific teachable information and as mentioned by Bellamy, I focused on the fights that I'd barely scraped through with my life. The methods that I had resorted to were likely more extreme than anything that leadership would consider as a regular curriculum, but if Bellamy truly wished for me to be honest about the reason for my survival, I knew that these choices were the key. I glanced over at him, prompting him to call the class to attention and cleared my throat nervously.
I found myself glossing over the lessons of my fathers in my memory that had shaped me into the survivor that I had become, combined with the self defence books that he'd left behind that I'd studied for exercise.
"Alright. Welcome to fighting like a scrappy lunatic 101." I opened in a light hearted manner, earning several chuckles from the audience and a sly smile from Bellamy as he remained beside me protectively. "Some of you may not realise yet that I have zero formal training, and no 'official' techniques that I can teach you, but you asked for me so here I am. Mostly, I think I've been selected because I'm small, but somehow still alive and you are all trying to figure out how. Honestly, it's a mystery to me too! But we're gonna work through it together." I announced in a jesting tone and was glad to notice that the group seemed to be relaxing into my approach to teaching. They glanced between each other with excited smiles and their positive reactions allowed some of my nerves to dissipate.
"Let's start with what I can offer. You've all been trained to be guards. You're mainly planning to be there as a deterrent inside of camp. You have guns which you expect to be able to use and so you've learned to fight in a certain, morally acceptable way. That's fine and absolutely useful knowledge to have. In fact, 90% of the time that will be enough for your roles. But as those of you who have been on the ground for long enough know, there's always that 10% of the time where Earth bites you on the ass and you have to do whatever it takes to survive. I'm here to teach you for that 10%." I revealed as I wandered from side to side in front of my gathered audience and managed to pick out the faces of Harper, Monroe and Raven in the crowd, who all smiled widely at me with a pride that made my stomach flip.
"I'm gonna be honest with you guys: if you're ever in a situation where you have to use these things, you're in trouble. The person you're fighting against isn't going to care that you are a young woman, smaller than them, potentially unarmed or maybe even captive. They will do anything necessary to survive and you need to be willing to do the same. If you're not comfortable with that, there's the door. You can leave now." I explained in a firm, cold manner and allowed several minutes of tense silence to pass for my potential trainees to make their decision. When the group remained unchanged, I peeked over at Bellamy with a thankful smile and felt a hint of confidence bloom in my chest. It was strange to acknowledge that there were more people in camp than just Bellamy who believed in me and I became determined to be worthy of their faith.
"Alright, let's start with something simple. I want you all to look at us. Really assess the two of us. If we were in a life or death fight, it should be obvious that Bellamy has a powerful advantage over me. These are the kind of odds that I want you to stand a chance at overcoming." I stated as I faced Bellamy and he chuckled at me, whilst a few of the audience scoffed in disbelief. Their doubt was unsurprising, as I understood how impossible that would seem but since I had landed on the ground, I'd proven repeatedly to be able to overcome odds that I would never have imagined. I glanced over their nervous faces with a resolute smile and decided in that moment that I would imbue some of the lessons I absorbed from my late fathers books.
"If you're faced against an opponent that you can't overpower, never tell yourself that's the end. Instead, you're going to focus on using everything that you have available to you. You're going to fight smart, rather than strong. They will have already decided that they can beat you just from looking at you. They'll be overconfident and they'll expect to win out of brute force. Use that to your advantage." I explained to the enthralled crowd, as excited whispers began to spread between them and took a deep breath to prepare myself for the next step. "Alright big boy, let's start with an example. Come at me." I ordered as I strolled over to the crash mats and squared my shoulders. Bellamy raised his brows at me with uncertainty, his back turned to the crowd to address me.
"What?!" He hissed as his eyes widened in shock and I felt my stomach flip with dread at his reaction. "Indie, I thought we'd be slowly demonstrating techniques, not actually sparring?" He breathed quietly, careful to keep his voice gentle enough that he would not be overheard as he neared me and I sighed in disappointment. Despite my initial reservations, I had forced myself to believe him when he promised to do whatever I needed and I couldn't help feeling somewhat frustrated in his lack of trust in my abilities.
"The technique relies on surprise. I can't demonstrate that properly if I tell you what to do. Now come on, you said you'd do whatever I needed." I argued with exasperation as I crossed my arms at him and he shifted awkwardly on the spot. He glanced back at the waiting trainees and then returned his attention to me with a conflicted expression. "Bel, either you can spar with me or I'll have to ask Lincoln, and you know that he won't be delicate." I muttered in a low enough volume that only he would hear and he grimaced at this threat. We both knew from our separate experiences of training with Lincoln that he was highly proficient at simulating the power of a real fight within a safe environment and we had several times left these experiences with injuries from our own overexertion.
He finally nodded in bitter agreement and reluctantly strolled over to take a position opposite me. As we waited to start, I noticed that his brows were deeply furrowed and knew that he was crucially afraid of hurting me. I hoped that once he realised that I could hold my own he would relax and steeled myself to prove that I didn't need protection. After a few moments of hesitation, he struck forward clumsily and I bounced lightly on my feet to manoeuvre out of his path. He almost sprawled onto one of the crash pads before he managed to save himself and I continued to flow quickly out of reach of his half hearted attacks. I kicked forward with enough power to knock him without actually causing any injury and his eyes widened in surprise as the impact pushed him aside. He stepped backwards to gain some space to recover and in quick succession, I trod on his foot and then struck rapidly at his throat. He gasped and lunged forward in an attempt to grab me, but I bounced out of his reach easily again. This time he was unable to recover from the momentum of his attack and crashed into the ground in a rather ungraceful movement. I turned back to my audience, who were watching with a mixture of disbelief and admiration with a smug smile.
"Alright, let's break down the important information from that: the bigger your opponent is, the slower they will move. In order to counter that, you should always remain light on your feet and move constantly. You can tire them out this way, whilst also remaining outside of their reach. If they are taller than you, they'll have longer arms which means they can usually land a hit on you before you can even get close to them. Stay at a distance until you are ready to strike and as I just demonstrated, allow them to use their own momentum against them. When you do move from defensive to offensive, make good use of your legs as they are longer so you'll have a better chance at reaching past their guard without whilst still maintaining some space for yourself. In order to maximise the power you can put into those strikes, you need to practice your kicks and strengthen those leg muscles. Find your usual sparring partner and see how those moves change your fights." I summarised and they eagerly spread out to begin practicing these new techniques together. I wandered over to Bellamy to assist him to his feet and he viewed me with a fresh amusement.
"Well, now all of these fights make sense! You're a sly little fox." He commented as he pushed me playfully and I giggled at his reaction. My chest swelled with relief as I noticed that he seemed to have relaxed as I had hoped and I was proud that I'd managed to hold my own against him. Despite the fact that I knew Bellamy would never intentionally hurt me, I had to admit that he was still a formidable opponent due to both the size/strength difference and his experience as a guard.
"You didn't really think that I was going swing for swing with all these big guys, did you?" I teased with a wink and he shook his head at me with an awestruck smile. For the first time, I considered what he had imagined to be the events of my previous fights and his disbelief finally seemed to make sense to me. "You only know a few of my tricks, don't get too confident. I'm still gonna kick your ass." I taunted as I crossed my arms at him confidently and a subtle snort escaped as he burst into chuckles at my small stature.
"Alright Xena, I won't be so easy on you now." He remarked with a smirk and I felt my stomach fizz with appreciation at the fond nickname.
Once I'd wandered the room to observe their practice and corrected any developing mistakes, I returned to standing at the front of the space. As one of the recruits attempted to use a tackle that they had been taught in a previous session, my memory was jogged back to the self defence books that I'd studied in my cell when I became paranoid about our new classes. It seemed like a lifetime ago, sitting in the dark cell on the Ark and obsessively attempting to prepare for some unknown threat so that I could protect Octavia. I ran through the limited information that I remembered and considered which of it would be most beneficial to fill the gaps in their learning. I gathered up the group and Bellamy patiently ran through moves slowly as I explained them. Once we'd finished, I addressed them in preparation for another round of sparring.
"So, you want to take advantage of areas of weakness. Those are the nose, eyes, throat, kneecaps, feet and, on men especially, the groin. Never underestimate the power of a good kick to the balls!" I instructed, to which Bellamy flinched nervously and several trainees laughed. "Don't forget to use other parts of your body than just your fists. The heel of your hand can give a nasty strike, especially if you're hitting upwards. Also, your elbows, your feet or your knees if you're kicking. Don't be afraid to get creative." I listed as the trainees nodded in response and I could already recognise the confidence that developed in their posture.
"What I want to demonstrate is how when it gets desperate, you need to get creative. Brute strength isn't everything, use your mind to outwit them." I announced to prepare them for the kind of scenario that I was aiming to simulate, before turning back to Bellamy with a nod. "Alright. This time, I want you to pin me down." I ordered nervously, expecting for him to argue but instead he threw me a suggestive look that broke some of the tension of my dread.
He swiftly tackled me to the floor and despite being prepared for it, the power that he was able to command still surprised me. I wiggled manically under his heavy hold and when I was unable to easily free myself, I resorted to forcing my knee into his side. He flinched, releasing one of my hands, which I used to jab into his armpit and loosen his grip on the hand that was still trapped. Whilst he was distracted, I barged my shoulders forward into his to shove him off me and crawled onto my hands and knees in an attempt to escape from him. Bellamy rushed after me and pulled me into a hold that although tight enough to be uncomfortable, would not actually choke me. I recognised this brace from the students and knew that it was crucial to teach them how to escape it. I made a few gripes for his face or neck, but was unable to reach him from the position that he'd contained me.
Mentally, I imagined that this was someone who truly meant to kill me in order to force my mum instincts to take over and without thinking, I bit into his hand, earning a dramatic yowl. The moment that he released some of pressure in shock, I burst my way out of his restraint and pinned him to the ground with my hands lightly on his neck. We were interrupted by a round of applause and some cheers, which broke us apart. We helped each other to our feet and brushed ourselves off as the noise faded out.
"Did you just bite me?" Bellamy breathed in a mixture of shock and admiration as his mouth fell open.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Was this not the right place for me to do that?" I asked suggestively and caught several giggles from nearby girls. A subtle smirk spread across his face, despite his attempt to bury it and I thoroughly enjoyed the way that his eyes studied me with a fresh excitement. Reluctantly, I tore my attention away from him and returned to facing our audience.
"The unfortunate truth is that when it comes to life and death, there are no limits. You need to be willing to do things that you never imagined you could do to another human being. Don't be afraid to bite, scratch, pinch, spit or even pull hair if you want to. These things may not be high impact attacks, but they'll come in handy when you've got no other options and will usually shock your opponent enough to give you a chance to escape or strike properly. Once you've managed to catch them off guard, make the most of every moment that you earn with surprise. Now, we're going to run through some simple tackles and holds that you can use to manipulate their strength and momentum, so you're not dependent on your own muscles."
- O - O - O - O - O -
The rest of the session passed quickly and the students left in high spirits. It was shocking to me how well the lesson had been received and I found myself pleased that I'd agreed to the unusual request. I sourced an ice pack for Bellamy and he took it from me with a disapproving smile. Although relieved that I hadn't seriously injured him, there was something amusing about witnessing him struggling in the aftermath of fighting me and I recognised from his expression that this was a highly unexpected result for him. Movement to my side drew my focus and I turned to find an unfamiliar face studying me with an entertained admiration.
"So, you're the infamous Indigo that I keep hearing about! You're exactly as described, that's a rarity." She crooned with a wide smile and I stared back at her in uncertainty. "Oh, I'm Gina. Raven, Harper and Monty have been telling me all about you." She explained as she held her hand out and I shook it awkwardly. "Well, I've managed to get a little info from this one too whenever I can get him off the topic of guard duty. You're pretty much the only other thing he'll talk about." She added with a playful wink and I glanced over at Bellamy fondly. He cleared his throat and tried to avoid meeting my eyes in embarrassment.
"Yeah, he's definitely a bit of a workaholic." I agreed as I looked poignantly down at Bellamy who simply rolled his eyes in response. "It's nice to meet you. I heard you've been getting to know some of the others. It's comforting to know that someone's keeping an eye on them whilst I'm gone." I replied casually with my hands in my pockets and she smiled warmly in response. She had curly brown hair and large, honest eyes. I couldn't place what caused it, but there was something trustworthy about her and I immediately understood how she'd been able to integrate with my little family so easily.
"Yeah, they're all great people and it's clear that they've been through a hard time. I didn't come to Earth until the Ark, so I want to do anything I can to help now that we're finally here." She revealed with an earnest attitude and I was surprised by how immediately open she was. It was clear that she had a strong work ethic and I was impressed by her willingness to contribute. She glanced between Bellamy and I, seeming to suddenly realise that she was interrupting and shuffled awkwardly on the spot. "Anyway, I'll let you be. You've had a busy day. Hit me up if you want to hang out, it would be nice to spend some time together." She suggested with a friendly smile before wandering off and I glanced over at Bellamy with confusion.
"You get used to her. She's a nice girl and she wants to help. We could do with more like that." He commented, before getting to his feet with a groan and I chuckled under my breath at him. "Jeez Indie, when you said you were gonna kick my ass I didn't think you actually meant it." He breathed in a dramatic manner, causing me to snort in laughter.
- O - O - O - O - O -
After a comforting night snuggled up with Bellamy, I felt recharged enough to manage some check-ins on people and wandered into the courtyard. I was in the process of navigating to Jasper and Monty's dorms when Councillor Kane blocked my path.
"Indigo, I was hoping to catch you before you left camp. Could we talk?" He asked with an overly friendly smile fixed in place and I shuffled on the spot with uncertainty. Until this point, I'd really only seen him from afar and had made a significant effort to keep it that way. I was surprised to even find that he knew my name and realised that I couldn't have remained as far under the radar as I believed I had.
"Umm, sure? What can I do for you Councillor?" I enquired with my brows furrowed together in confusion and he put a hand on my upper arm to lead me aside. Immediately, I was uncomfortable with the contact and shrugged him off with more aggression than intended.
"Let's go somewhere more private." He remarked as he led me inside and I felt nerves building in my chest as I followed behind him. Despite Bellamy's frequent comments about his trustworthiness, I couldn't help feeling as if I were in trouble and a voice at the back of my mind urged me to turn tail and run. As his boots echoed through the halls of the Ark, I was struck with a strange sense of deja vu from the day of my arrest, causing a wave of nausea to wash over me.
When we arrived at a small doorway, Kane stepped aside and gestured for me to enter first. I examined him suspiciously before I passed and the moment that I stepped inside I found Abby waiting with her usual serene smile. Her presence was immediately reassuring and I felt my shoulders drop their tension. We waited silently for Kane to join us, closing the door tightly behind him and then settling into a seat beside the familiar Chancellor in a carefree manner. Abby cleared her throat to draw my cautious gaze away from my detailed assessment of Kane as I tried to anticipate his intentions and as our eyes met, she smiled fondly.
"I'm sorry for the secrecy, Indigo. We wanted to be sure that this meeting was private and as unbiased as possible for you. As I'm sure you can imagine, we have a great deal to manage in setting up a sustainable community here. That's what we've brought you here to discuss." She addressed me with a calmness that demonstrated how well she had grown into her new role and I glanced between them with a baffled expression.
"With all due respect Chancellor, I'm not sure how that involves me?" I suggested with my best attempt at a well mannered tone and Abby's smile grew into an amused grin. She peered over at Kane, who regarded me with a curious interest and seemed pleased to be given the opportunity to lead the conversation.
"We would like to establish a stronger alliance with the grounders. The ceasefire has been a blessing, but we need to negotiate trade and open communication with the Commander. For the time being, the most correspondence that we receive from her is permission to leave Arkadia for supplies or patrols." He revealed with an evenness to his voice that almost made his suggestion sound reasonable, but I couldn't contain a disbelieving scoff as I stared back at him. "That's where you would be involved. I understand that you have been training with a grounder and integrating with their lifestyle. We'd like to utilise your experience to help us to plan our strategies and to approach the Commander. In order for us to properly receive your input, we would like you to join our council meetings." Kane divulged and I felt my mouth fall open in shock. I gaped at the two of them for a few moments as if awaiting a punchline, but when neither of them spoke I found myself stuttering for words.
"W-what? Are you insane? I-you-what?!" I spat as I continued to gape at them and they simply calmly smiled back, only further fuelling my exasperation. "I know that negotiating the ceasefire was a hell of an achievement, but this is a completely different level of cohesion that you're aiming for here. We've managed to earn the respect of one or two grounders for a couple of our people, but even they still view us as a whole as dangerous, clueless children compared to them. Our partnerships with Indra and Arlo were hard fought. We couldn't do anything on a large enough scale to impress them all. It would never work. We would need individuals to be willing to change, to work with grounders, study with them, respect them and honestly I don't think there are many people here with the grit to do that." I stated in a frustrated rant as I reflected over my own initiation and the gruelling tasks that I'd undertaken since. There were very few people that I could imagine being willing to endure that kind of process and even fewer grounders that would offer the opportunity. I shook my head at the thought and Kane observed me with an unexpected understanding in his eyes.
"Indigo, I know that a lot changed whilst you were captive in Mount Weather. When you were taken, you and the rest of the 100 were at war with the grounders and you emerged to find that we allied to free you. It must be disorientating." He commented and I rolled my eyes at him, feeling patronised. "Whilst you were there, the grounders came to Arkadia for a joint training session under the Commanders orders. It was chaotic, but it demonstrated to me that we could help one another and that the Commander was open to this possibility too. An alliance could be mutually beneficial. We just need your help to convince them of that." He presented his case calmly, even in the face of my reactions as I began to pace in front of the two of them and only stopped to fix them both with a scrutinising look.
"Why me?" I asked in an accusing manner and they looked to each other awkwardly. "Octavia has been partnered with Indra for far longer. She has a close link to the Commander and she was here during this training session that you were so confident in. Surely she's a better match? Or hell, Lincoln?! He's been a grounder his entire life. Octavia and I pale in comparison and he has been an advocate for peace in the past. I can't think why in the hell you would bring this to me?" I probed with annoyance growing in my voice as I listed points and Kane seemed to pass the responsibility of answering this question to Abby.
"We already asked Octavia. She was quite clear on her thoughts of who 'her people' were." She answered quietly and a coy smile spread across my lips at this information. "And Lincoln still has a kill order on his head. Although he would be, and had been, useful for advice, he would not be able to participate in any meetings with the grounders." She clarified as if this were an obvious disadvantage and I scoffed loudly at the incredulous implication.
"Meetings with the grounders? You want to send me out to discuss an alliance with people?!" I exclaimed, hardly able to believe what I was hearing and I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Kane seemed to be highly amused by my behaviour, rather than frustrated as I would have expected. "Have you completely lost your mind, Abby?" I argued, whilst she squirmed awkwardly in her seat under the intensity of my gaze.
"Take some time to consider it, Indigo. You don't need to make a decision right now. Our next meeting is tomorrow." Kane interrupted and I turned to face him with a stern scowl. "I remember your case and imprisonment. It was a tough one to follow the law on. You had a hard life on the Ark. You could be more here, just give yourself the opportunity." He appealed in a manner that was likely intended to be understanding and I felt a passionate rage boiling to the surface as my hands tightened into fists at my sides.
"You don't know shit!" I snapped, before quickly reminding myself that I couldn't allow my anger to control me any longer. I took a few deep breaths to steady myself, then fixed Kane with a glare that would destroy a lesser man with it's pressure alone. "I don't need time to consider it. The answer is no. You can find someone else to be your scapegoat with the grounders." I growled as I sharply turned on my heel and swept from the room.
