Chapter 50 – Narcissus
Another day on the back of his dragon, doing one of the things that he loved the most, was not enough to appease his heartache. Flying was not enough to erase from his mind the fact that he could have been a father but wasn't. The fact that the love of his life could have carried his child but on an unfortunate episode had a miscarriage and lost what they didn't even dream of having. And that she blamed herself for that. What a mess.
He was angry before, for Arya had hidden it all from him, but the truth was that his anger was very often here today and gone tomorrow. When concerning Arya, that idea was especially true. He could not be upset with her for too long, and that was what happened. Eragon was hurt, yes, but not angry anymore. He was disappointed, but not resentful. But above all, he was resolute to keep with his decision of preserving her life by not being her mate any longer.
Saphira hummed with satisfaction when she managed to outsmart Fírnen on a game of words. The green dragon passed under her and nudged her belly with his tail before speeding up, leaving her behind in an attempt of challenging her. If he couldn't beat her mentally, then he hoped to win by strength. She didn't take the bait and kept at her comfortable pace.
"Marvelous creatures, are they not?" Däthedr screamed his question near his ear through the wind.
Eragon simply turned his head to the side so he could give the elf a polite nod. He wasn't interested in starting a friendship with him.
After feeling his blood a little cooler, Eragon analyzed what had happened leading to his separation from Arya. Although she was the one keeping secrets from him, Lord Däthedr had clearly played with those secrets to create problems between the couple. He wanted to separate the two of them, it was all deliberate. Eragon was right in the end. Lord Däthedr was not a trustworthy man.
I was thinking, little one…
Yes?
It was the beginning of the third day of their trip. Alagaësia was only a couple of hours away and Ellesméra was only two days away if they sped up, or a little more if they kept the pace they had been flying at. The cold was hard to handle when flying on a dragon, but Eragon kept himself warm enough with a protective spell.
Angela once said that everyone knows about you and Arya. But it was only a figure of speech, right? How can everyone know something you are so dedicated to keeping hidden?
I believe she meant that people suspect.
Right! Because you two had always been close, during the war, and now in the Games.
Aye. What's your point?
Well, to compel a people to rise against their queen one would require proof that she is doing something wrong or risky, such as getting involved with a human Rider, the Head Rider, more specifically.
All right…
The only way to get the proof would be if a witness provided testimony of such relationship. An eyewitness bound by the Ancient Language to speak the truth.
And?
Angela wouldn't do that. Elva, for as cunning as she is, wouldn't do it either for it would sabotage the agreement she has with you. Let alone Renir and Avelina, they are too loyal. Dusan didn't even find out about you two. This leaves us with only one person capable of providing proof of your involvement with Arya.
Däthedr.
The idea was so simple that he felt like an idiot for not thinking of that himself. And how about Arya? Apparently, she trusted him so much that overlooking that fact was natural for her. Perhaps his little test with the letter he sent to Däthedr was enough for her to trust his loyalty. In the end, Eragon's attempt to protect her worked against her.
Do you think Arya knows? Saphira asked.
He wouldn't be alive if she did.
She must know!
Eragon knew Arya could keep her matters hidden, but not that. No, she wouldn't stand having her advisor betraying her under her nose passively. She even questioned Lord Däthedr's efficiency when advising her, but the thought of his betrayal seemed alien to her.
For as strange as that sounds, I don't think she realizes how rotten he is.
Will you tell her?
Aye, but not yet.
What's keeping you?
I also need proof. I can't accuse her advisor of treason without taking the right measures.
We must think of a way of getting such proof then.
Getting Däthedr to incriminate himself would be challenging, but he couldn't take Arya back to Ellesméra when she was so close to her traitor. It would be like walking into a trap. The thought of traveling with Arya's biggest offender sounded disgusting in his head. It made him scoot forward a little so he could put as much distance as possible on the saddle between him and the elven lord.
They spent the time they had in the air thinking of a way to get the evidence they needed to expose Däthedr to Arya. It even helped to forget about the conversation he had with Arya the night before. He supposed that if it were only to warn her about imminent danger, his words would be more than enough, but he imagined that for a queen to punish a subject, an advisor, she would need more than a handful of heartfelt words.
Eragon was almost about to tell Saphira that they should question him until he was so cornered that he would have to tell the truth when he felt strange all a sudden.
Saphira, do you feel that?
I do. What is it?
I think…
…It's Alagaësia!
Eragon could almost laugh because the strangeness he felt was the magic emanating from the land. So subtle but so noticeable.
He looked around to see that they were still following the Edda and the landscape was the same as he remembered but he wished to see it up close. They were near Hedarth, the most eastern trading post the dwarves had, and they were planning to keep out of sight. So, Eragon chose a safe spot for them to land. As Saphira communicated their decision to Fírnen, Däthedr poked him on the shoulder to ask why they were descending.
"We need a break!" He shouted through the wind.
Where Saphira led, Fírnen followed, and soon they were stretching their legs, standing on an almost arid patch of grass, battered by the cold but also because they were so near the Hadarac Desert.
"Why are we stopping?" Elva questioned. She inspected them trying to find a good reason.
Eragon stared at Saphira, the wonderment was still running through their minds.
"Is this… Normal?" He asked the others.
"What?" Arya eyed him just as quizzically as Elva did.
"Alagaësia! I tell the students how this land is changing, but I would never expect to feel it so clearly and so fast after the first dragon hatching here again."
Why they were looking at him as he was a mad man he didn't know. But the fact was that he was right! The magic was changing the land again, it was perfecting it. He walked around, looking for visible signs of such change. Saphira did too.
"Eragon," Arya called while he was looking at all the remaining green he didn't know. "What are you looking for?"
He looked at her and for the first time in two days he didn't see their troubled relationship, but a fellow Rider who would be as interested as he was in that subject.
"How magic is changing the land."
Arya furrowed her brows and then she relaxed.
"Now I understand. It's been happening for us so slowly over time that we take it from granted, but for you, it must seem like a big change. Come, let me show you."
Saphira and Eragon followed Arya to the riverbed, where the vegetation was more abundant, even if it was not much. She knelt on the ground and he mimicked her.
"Open your mind, Eragon and Saphira, and do what Oromis taught you. Follow the ants."
Eragon closed his eyes and opened his mind. He immediately found the little creatures huddled for the winter under a rock. He had never seen that kind of ant before.
"Why are you showing us th…" Mid-sentence he realized why. "Because they didn't exist here before, did they?" He looked at her.
Arya shook her head. "Actually, they did, but barely. These ants were almost extinct, but with the dragons' magic back in Alagaësia they found the means to thrive again."
"How do you know that?"
"The land speaks, don't you know that?"
He stared into her eyes marveled and nodded.
"It's wonderful!"
She agreed. Then she realized how close they were and diverted her eyes, standing up.
"And it's happening all over the place. You will see when we arrive at Du Weldenvarden."
"I can't wait." He stood up as well ready to go.
The desire to hold her tight and tell her he didn't blame her for anything almost made him follow her as she went back to Fírnen, but he stopped himself. It was better this away.
Sir Urien had been following Angela and Solembum through the frozen forest of the north for days, still, they hadn't found any signs of intelligent life.
"Don't be fooled by your eyes, gentle knight. Even if you don't see them, they can see you," Angela explained when he mentioned the lack of interaction with other beings.
"Who? The werecats?"
"Who else?"
They resumed their journey in silence, but Sir Urien kept looking around to see if he could spot any of the creatures she talked about.
Traveling with her proved to be easier than he expected at first. She kept her silence for the most part of the day, only participating in a long conversation when they sat to eat. And it was always entertaining, even if it confused him sometimes.
Sir Urien occupied himself with the stew he cooked on the fire while Angela stood in the middle of the clearing they chose to camp. She was looking at the stars, sometimes measuring the sky with her palms.
"Found anything interesting there?"
Her eyes shone briefly before her answer.
"Oh, there are many interesting things out there. You would be surprised."
"Will you tell me?"
Angela came to sit by Solembum, who snuggled himself on a blanket near the fire.
Sir Urien was an experienced man, almost reaching his fifth decade of life. He had fought in the war, guarded the lord's family for generations, and seen things that a common man would never imagine. Still, his curiosity sometimes took the best of him.
"I could never." She shook her head and her curls danced around her face. "You would judge me mad."
"Too late. I already do," he mumbled with a bit of humor. Angela found it too funny and laughed aloud. Her voice echoed through the clearing, and Urien couldn't help to feel uncomfortable, as an attack was imminent. "We don't need to talk about the stars then. But there is something I would like to ask, and I want a true answer from you."
The herbalist narrowed her eyes and glanced at the werecat. He merely blinked at her and rested his head on his front paws.
"All right, I will be as truthful as possible."
"Why am I here?"
Her shoulders relaxed as she was expecting something much worse.
"I told you. So you can have your revenge."
"No, that's a reason for me. Why am I here, for you? You know the way, I've seen you going into de forest one night. I'm sure the werecats told you about where the magicians hide, and you will be able to convince them to come along."
The corners of her eyes creased as she squinted them.
"You are more perceptive than I took you for."
"So?" Urien insisted.
"I need a sword, of course."
"Why didn't you ask the Riders to protect you?"
"They don't know I'm here. I'm sure they would appreciate our little adventure."
Urien felt suddenly anxious. For the first time since they crossed the northern wall, he felt unsafe, even knowing where they were heading to and who they were about to meet.
"I can't protect you from a bunch of warlocks. I can't protect you from Bachel."
"I never said I needed protection."
His heartbeat sped up.
"Why do you need a sword then?"
Urien watched Angela having a silent discussion with the werecat. They were trading looks, and it seemed like Solembum had won the fight.
"If I had a piece of information that sounded crazy, completely mental, yet spoke of your future. Would you like to know?"
"I would." He wasn't a man to be afraid of fortune-telling or silly prophecies. He was more rational than that.
"You are going to die in this war. Facing Bachel and her minions in the frozen forest are the last thing you are going to do in this life."
Her monotone voice delivered the information that was supposed to make him feel afraid, but all he felt was humor. His laugh came out hoarse as he was coughing, as it usually was, despite not being heard much. Urien couldn't stop laughing, so Angela waited with mirth in her eyes.
"Take your time," she said.
He laughed a little longer, then it started to die in his throat. An emptiness formed in his core, as he was believing her.
"That's not true."
"It is."
"How?"
"I shouldn't tell how you are going to die. It may cause fear in you. It's a terrible way to go."
"No, not that. How do you know?"
She looked up to the stars and the longing he had seen before in her eyes appeared again.
"I just know things. That's how my magic works. I can't cast spells, but I know things."
"So you brought me here to die? Are you sacrificing me?"
Angela widened her eyes at him, showing regret.
"Oh, no! You were already going to die before I invited you to come. If you stay in Ceunon, you die. If you flee to the south, death will still find you somehow." The herbalist extended her hand to touch his, which stirred the stew but stopped at her contact. "I've been watchful of your future ever since we left, and there's still no change. If there is even the slightest possibility of you living through this, I will grab it. I will forget the mission and get you to safety. I promise."
"But until then, I'm your offering to the universe."
She retreated her hand and smiled sadly.
"The universe is too vast to recognize us. You will see when you get there."
Whatever that meant, if he was going to be reborn as a star or else, it didn't make sense to him the peace he felt to know all of that. He didn't know if he believed it completely, but it was worth a shot. If he were to die, then trying to avenge his fallen lord wouldn't be the worst way to go. He had a purpose after all.
A stew was also being prepared on the eastern side of Alagaësia. Elva chopped the vegetables they had brought from Mount Arngor's stock as Eragon poked the ember with a stick to stoke the fire under the pan.
With the corner of his eyes, he watched as Däthedr bowed to Arya after her telling him something he couldn't decipher. They were standing several feet away by the river, and it looked like he was apologizing. Eragon could bet they were having a difficult conversation.
Eragon felt himself smiling with a sarcasm that wasn't typical of him. Arya was mistreating Däthedr. Perhaps the distinguished lord didn't quite recognize her coldness toward him daily, but Eragon knew her too well. She was punishing her advisor harder than the punishment she was giving Eragon with cold stares and fiery words.
"How does he feel about that?" Eragon whispered toward Elva, who threw him a bothered glance.
"It's none of your business."
He shrugged.
"I know. But he has feelings for her, I can't help to be a little possessive."
Elva laughed with enthusiasm. When he stared at her without knowing what he had said that was so funny, she laughed even harder.
"He does… He does not… have feelings for her," she said trying to catch her breath.
"What are you saying? Of course he has. He's trying to manipulate her to take my place and be with her."
"And does it sound like something someone with feelings for another person would do to them?"
"Well, it's cruel, that's for sure."
"It's heartless. He has no feelings."
"Is that what you feel when you approach him? Nothing?" He asked doubting her words.
"Listen," she started with her violet eyes looking very deeply into his, and he could feel a perverse interest in the matter. "Each person has a dark spot in their soul. A place where we hide our fears, doubts, resentment, anxieties, and insecurities. Some people have it darker than others, but we all have it. Except for a few odd people. He is one of them."
"You're saying he is too good for the rest of us?"
"Oh, no. Quite the opposite."
"But if he has no dark spots in his soul…"
"He's broken. Not better, just dysfunctional."
"I don't understand."
"Last night, during supper, he threw a bug in the fire. After that, he felt nothing. No changes in his soul. Nothing."
"It was just a bug."
"You spent enough time in the minds of bugs to know that even the smallest form of life is worth preserving. So, are you going to tell me that you would be unscathed after deliberately ending a life? I felt so sick after killing my first enemy I almost fainted. And I couldn't care less about him."
He wanted to say he wouldn't, but he also didn't know how much he would feel the death of a bug.
"I suppose not. But it was just a bug after all."
"You wouldn't, trust me. Even the darkest of souls would be changed, even if they didn't know that. I've seen it many times before, it leaves an invisible scar. Däthedr is heartless not because he is cruel, but because he just can't feel anything."
"Is it a magical shield?"
"No, it happens to unmagical individuals too."
"Why he wants to be with Arya then?"
"Because it would benefit him somehow."
"He wants to be king," Eragon noted while looking at Saphira, who was lying behind them with Fírnen.
Saphira blinked an eye at him but didn't say anything.
"And I could bet my both arms that he would go any lengths to achieve that," Elva threw the vegetables in the pan. It seemed to Eragon that she was bored by that conversation already.
"Have you told that to Arya?"
"She never asked."
"Elva!"
The odd woman faced him with annoyance.
"It's none of my business! I don't use my abilities for free, you know? My dark spot is very darkened by the fear of being poor and hungry."
"You're not hungry, Arya puts food in your plate and clothes on your back. You should be paying it back and be grateful."
Elva swallowed painfully, but her eyes never ceased to look proud.
"Why don't you tell her?"
"I will. I just need proof, good enough so she can use when bringing him to justice."
Eragon got up and paced around, still eying the pair that talked in the distance. The night had almost fallen completely, so their figures were partially in the shadows.
What do you think, Saphira? Do you think Elva's words would suffice?
To convince Arya, your words alone would suffice, little one. But it's not enough for the council.
Shouldn't we be thinking about now instead of ahead?
You're saying that we should tell her now and see about convicting him later?
Aye. We need to protect her now. What if there's a trap waiting for her when we arrive?
Elva inspected his emotions as they spoke inside their minds. He saw her taking a deep breath and cracking her neck as she was feeling his stress, and she was.
"Just tell her," she whispered in suffering with her eyes closed. "The secrets you two keep have already done too much damage."
She's right. Saphira said. You are too. Deal with the danger now and let the elven law take care of Däthedr later.
Eragon squatted by Elva's side, which made her flinch.
"Please, get away while you sort this out. You are suffocating me with all this nervousness."
"I need your word that you will back me up on this."
"Fine, you have my word, now leave."
The timing couldn't be more right, because Däthedr went to his tent while Arya came their way.
"Not now. We are doing this together. Gratitude, remember?"
She clenched her jaw but nodded.
When Arya sat down opposite them, Eragon cast a spell so they couldn't be heard.
Here goes nothing, he thought before telling her about how her trusted advisor was so rotten, he couldn't even be considered normal. Egoistical, claimed Elva. Self-absorbed. If Arya was shocked or surprised, her eyes didn't betray her, but one thing was clear: Lord Däthedr's punishment was going to be unthinkable times worse than his. That mean thought made his dark spot grow larger, but who cares, it was something natural after all.
A/N: Hello, hello!
Wow, I'm in shock with your response to the last chapter. I mean, break-ups are hard, right? Thank you for your support! You made my week with all the comments. If you feel like it, keep them coming. I love it.
Do you know someone like Däthedr? I do, and let me tell you, what a mess they make. Anyway…
See you next week!
