To Those Who Want My Love
The Champion had been excised. Mt. Coronet still burned. The region was in shambles. Chaos and panic reigned. The end of the world was upon them all.
And here in Pastoria, people were planning a concert. They kept living on, because what else were they supposed to do?
Pyxis moved through the lush streets like a Misdreavous, walking from shadow to shadow, making herself smaller than she already was and trying to keep everyone's eyes off her as best she could. She'd considered pulling her hoodie up, but past experiences had taught her that it would only make her look more conspicuous. Although to be honest, it wasn't the people of Pastoria she was worried about recognizing her; it was her prey.
The incident back at the protest had been a slip-up on her part. Now that some time had passed, she'd calmed down enough to admit that, at the very least. But even if someone from this town were to recognize her… they wouldn't call the Association on her, would they?
You're being naïve again, she told herself.
No. She'd fallen down far, but not as far as to doubt the people she'd been fighting for all this time. She got glimpses of their downcast expressions as she walked. There was a heavy, gloomy air to the once-bustling city; even those who seemed to be preparing for the concert later that night –mostly young people from what she'd seen– looked like something was tugging down at them, making their smiles crooked and forced, eyes full of worry.
Some were more blatant than others. Pyxis didn't doubt some of them wouldn't take the situation as well. But whether it be angrily protesting, staying in home consumed with fear or preparing an event for others to unwind in these trying times, everyone was coping in their own way. Because, again…
What else could they do?
Her steps got faster, more aggressive. Inside the pockets of her jacket, her hands balled into fists.
There weren't as many trainers around lately, though she wasn't sure if it was because the League had been cancelled, because they were needed by the Association or simply because they were smart enough to realize strolling around with a belt full of Pokeballs wasn't the best idea currently. Some might have called them smart for reading the mood and staying away. But Pyxis couldn't have hated them more.
Cowards, the lots of them. Her anger flared at the memory of what Lucian of the Elite Four had done when they met. Rotten to the core…
She didn't blame Caelum or any of the others for leaving. Not anymore. That had been another moment of weakness on her part; that nebulous heat, that cloud of anger that overtook her brain and made it impossible to think straight. It was always there in the back of her mind, waiting to swallow her. Every time she came out of it, it was like pushing her head above the surface of the water, finally able to breathe. She could think clearly again. She was herself again, the true Pyxis, the one that understood that her anger was meant to focus only on those who deserved it, not on her closest friends.
But whenever said anger rushed through her, it was so hard to remember. Like her previous lucidity had never existed to begin with, until she came back from it and the whole process repeated again. It was an endless cycle. A part of her that overshadowed all the others, no matter how much she'd tried to keep it at bay.
But not anymore. There's no point.
So no, she didn't blame her friends for walking away. In a way, they were right. Thanks to Team Galactic, the dam that had stood in the way of justice had been shattered to pieces, and now true change had came crashing down them. This was no time for rituals or miracles. It was their time to shine; those who actually cared, the true children of Sinnoh. If they wanted to keep the ball rolling, then this new change had to be cultivated, kept alive, strong. Most would stay away from the cause. Again, Pyxis couldn't blame them; everyone had their own battles to fight, their own lives to live. The rest would carry on the torch in the meanwhile.
And who knew. Maybe sometime down the line, everyone else would realize that the power of those keeping them down was nothing but an illusion. That despite their bluster and posturing, trainers couldn't hurt them. The Champion had tried, after all, if only accidentally. And that alone had been enough to land a mortal wound on the Association.
The moment those meteors of light fell down upon the cities of Sinnoh, the moment civilian lives had been compromised, it was all over. The division in the region had changed. It was no longer the Association versus Team Galactic; it was the Association and all its trainers versus the people of Sinnoh.
And that was a fight that they had no hope of winning.
Best they could try to do was mitigate the damages, something Lucian had already started doing. But even in their best-case scenario, they couldn't stop change. Caelum was right: the Association was done for, at least in its current form. The divide of League and government was inevitable, as were the restrictions upon trainer privileges and the relaxation of the stern rules that once governed who was allowed to become one. It wouldn't happen right away. It was the kind of change that would come slowly, painfully so, but it would come. Of that, Pyxis was certain.
And that begged the question:
Why am I still looking for her, then?
They'd accomplished what they'd set out to do, but Pyxis couldn't join Caelum and the others in what was to come. Not because she didn't want to. She just couldn't.
There's something wrong with me, she thought, looking downcast. Always has been.
That heat. That all-consuming cloud of anger and exaltation that stuck to the back of her mind at all times, waiting to come out. She'd tried to control it before. Auriga, Orion and Saturn had done their best to teach her how to, and it had worked, for a time. She'd been getting better. Her bad days were in the minority and she'd begun to be able to control her temper whenever she was about to lose control.
But then, Auriga died. Then, Saturn had left. Then… Orion and the rest had gone their own way.
And she was alone again. Alone with nothing but that other part of herself, the part that kept telling her that it was the true Pyxis. That the one trying to keep it at bay was an imposter. A face she presented to others so that they wouldn't surmise her true self.
A mask.
She was starting to agree, but it wasn't like it mattered anymore. As far as she was concerned, she would never see her friends again. They didn't need someone like her. Her anger had served its purpose, but now it was too unwieldy, too unpresentable for them to bother with. If she went with them, she'd be worse than a burden. Even if she didn't want to, she'd eventually lose her temper at the wrong time and place and make things even worse for her friends.
She'd done that enough already. No more.
A narrow path opened at her right, an unintentional hallway between buildings necessitated by the tall ash tree growing between them. Pyxis ventured through it without thinking, eyes distant. The tree itself wasn't thick enough to block the way, but the shrubbery growing around it and the bindweed climbing up the walls would've made it difficult for anyone bigger than her to get to the other side.
Dark. The contrast with the sunny street she'd just come out of was apparent; the leaves and the height of the buildings was blocking all sunlight from coming in. Her eyes took a moment to adjust, but as she walked she felt a softness under her feet. Dirt and grass. There were also some small white flowers and a patch of brown mushrooms stretching through the short and narrow hallway, but she didn't mind. Even if the cold was made worse by the humidity and lack of sunlight, Pyxis walked over a few feet and sat down against the wall, breathing out harshly.
She didn't lower herself carefully. As soon as she turned with her back against the wall she just let herself fall, letting only gravity figure out in what position she'd be sitting down. A stab of pain ran up her back as she fell, but there was bliss as well. Her calves throbbed now that they didn't have to hold her, and her lungs started burning less and less with every hitched breath she inhaled.
Pyxis might've been small, but she was by no means unathletic. Walking all the way from Hearthome to Pastoria would've made anyone feel ready to lie down and die.
Right. That's the only reason.
She didn't bother shushing the voice away. She was too tired to even feel irritated by it. Her head throbbed with pain. Her stomach growled and twisted itself into painful knots, clamoring for food she hadn't given it for two days now. Food that would probably never come. Every inch of her body was sore and exhausted, but she welcomed it wholeheartedly. She certainly could have taken some breaks on her way here, but then she wouldn't feel like this.
Lately, pain and exhaustion were the only thing keeping the bad thoughts at bay.
Minutes passed. Pyxis didn't know how many; she might have dozed off for a while, but when she came back to herself what little heat she'd produced by walking had evaporated. Her muscles shivered, now not only from exhaustion but cold as well. She felt her teeth clatter.
Something else crept up her exhausted mind. Dark thoughts of–
Pyxis shook her head violently. She raised her arm and started fiddling with her Poketch, trying to distract herself while she thought of the task ahead.
Inyssa. She had to find Inyssa.
She'd reached Hearthome too late. Getting to Inyssa while she was in Fantina's care would be suicide, so she waited for an opportunity, and finally saw the girl leave the city, alone. Unfortunately, she was accompanied by her Pokemon. So Pyxis followed from far away, trying to keep up. She knew her best shot would come when Inyssa settled down somewhere in the city. Once her Pokemon were back in their balls she could–
Why? What's the point?
The apathy hit her like a hammer, threatening to shatter what little willpower she'd been able to muster, like a blanket of broken glass, each shard digging into her, the pain protecting her from the cold storming inside her chest.
You didn't deserve it, but neither did she, the voice whispered, inviting. It's okay. You did your best so just let g–
With strength that shouldn't be possible, Pyxis threw her arm to the side, slamming her knuckles against the wall. A crack was heard. White spots filled her vision; the rush of heat and pain enough to burn away that terrible sensation, bringing her back to herself. She lowered her head, eyes closed, teeth clenched.
"N-no…" she whispered through pursed lips. "I'm not going to… fade away, just like that…"
She was done. There was no longer a reason for her to live, not now. Even the broken dream that had somehow survived inside of her had gone out once she screamed out to the world that she was a member of Team Galactic. She was a wanted criminal. No matter for how long she hid, she would never hold a Pokeball again. Yet as guilty as it made her feel, as shameful as it was for someone like her to still want to be a trainer, she knew deep down that it was the only thing that would ever make her happy.
But now it was over. No one could blame her for this. She'd tried to become a trainer legally, hadn't she? She'd enrolled in a trainer school despite the strain it put on her family, and she'd worked harder than anyone else, only for her one opportunity to be snatched away by a talentless rich kid that didn't even last two months as a trainer.
Then, she'd joined Team Galactic. While with them, she'd gotten to fight with borrowed Pokemon a couple times, mostly while facing Inyssa, but it had never felt right. Not with stolen Pokemon. So she'd given them away and focused only on her goal. She'd set out to mete out her own justice, to make things right in a way she could never do while shackled by laws and rules. And now that she'd succeeded, she was no longer of use to anyone.
She'd given it her best shot despite the terrible circumstances, and this was her reward. The only thing left for her to do was die.
The anger came rushing back, filling the void that had been there a few seconds ago, and with it, the throbbing pain in her hand did as well.
She would not just lie down in a dreary, forgotten place like this and let the cold and apathy wash her away. Her struggle would be a stupid, pointless one. Less like a candle burning its brightest before going out, more like a wounded Pokemon baring its fangs and throwing itself at the jaws of death. One last act of defiance. At least one more moment in which she could feel like she was in control, like a choice was hers to be made.
Inyssa wouldn't die by her hand. The idea was absurd; even if she were to catch the girl unaware and unaccompanied by her Pokemon, she still had the powers of a legend. She was still so much more than Pyxis could ever hope to be.
As a matter of fact, she was everything Pyxis had hoped to be back then.
The thought filled her with shame and disgust, teeth clenching and nose scrunching up, but she was past deluding herself at this point. Might as well come clean, if only to herself. That way, at least she could die with a clear conscience.
She felt the weight of something inside her pocket. She knew what it was. Knew that taking it out and looking at it wouldn't make her feel better, wouldn't serve any real purpose. But that's what she did anyway. Her bruised, throbbing knuckles screamed in protest, but she swallowed the pain down, telling herself she'd check if there was a fracture later.
A worn, classic red and white Pokeball rested on her palm, its light weight betraying that it was completely empty. Pyxis swallowed. She felt something try to get to her, a dark, pulsing feeling of dread, but all she had to do was flex her fingers again and the pain chased it away.
The ball had never had a Pokemon inside to begin with. It was nothing more than a relic, a memento of her childhood. A piece of trash she'd found one day laying on the street, probably dropped by some oblivious trainer who wouldn't even notice its absence. Of course, Pokeballs were illegal to own unless you were a trainer or got permission from the Association, but 7-year old Pyxis hadn't known that, and it's not like anyone cared. You couldn't catch any dangerous Pokemon with one of these, especially after so many years. Right now, it was nothing but a useless piece of worn garbage.
Her lips pursed into a line, and she felt an itch behind her eyes.
When I become a trainer, I'll catch my first Pokemon with this ball! She heard her younger self's voice, so full of energy and joy. I'm sure fate wants it that way!
The biggest mistake Pyxis had ever made was believing there was anyone out there that cared, mortal or deity. It was up to her to care. And she did; she cared so fucking much, but what good was that now?
"Inyssa…" The name came out hoarse and weak from her mouth, voice shaking. "Please, at least give me this. Let me die with some dignity."
It took her a few minutes to fall back to herself. She saved the Pokeball back in her pocket, pushing herself to her feet with some effort. A wave of dizziness washed over her as she stood up.
That was enough of feeling sorry for herself. She had to get out of here before the Paras and other Pokemon came back, and she had to bandage her hand and see if she could find Inyssa. Part of her wondered if she should find some food or get some rest, but for some reason that she didn't want to think about, she didn't want to recover her strength.
Wobbling with every step, she emerged from behind the bushes around the thick ash tree and stepped back into the sunny street, flinching at the sudden sunlight hitting her face. Swallowing on a dry throat, she breathed in deep and took her first step down the street.
Her legs failed her, and her vision swam. There was barely a moment of dizziness and disorientation before an impact reverberated through her body, blacking out her vision for a moment.
When it came back a few seconds later, Pyxis realized she was laying down on her side, cheek resting on the cold cement. She didn't react for a while. She just blinked gormlessly, mouth slightly open, both mind and body taken by a painful haze.
Then, she heard someone talk.
"Wh-holy shit, are you okay!? H-here, let me…"
A pair of gentle hands took hold of her arms, helping her up, and Pyxis let herself be moved, too dazed to react properly.
Inyssa had absolutely no idea why she'd come to Pastoria, and it was honestly pretty liberating.
"H-hgyurk!" She hoisted one of the heavy speakers over her shoulder and strode forward, face scrunched up in effort. "F-fuck… shouldn't these be m-mostly hollow? How is it so heavy?"
She knew the answer, of course. It wasn't that the speaker was particularly heavy, her arms were simply so skinny and weak that even a noodle would feel offended if she compared them to it. Even so, there was something pleasant about it. It was the type of exertion Barry had always told her about, the kind that left you tired but in a good way. Especially if she was doing this to help others.
"Hgh…T-there."
She pushed the back of the speaker forward, letting it rest atop the floor of the stage, which reached up to her shoulders. Taking a step back, she sighed and wiped a bead of sweat off her forehead. Just a minute to rest and she'd go back for more, as soon as her heart stopped imitating the rhythm of a Snorlax using Belly Drum. In the meantime, she turned around and overlooked the wild expanse of green and brown that was the dry outskirts of the marsh.
The place was big enough to hold a good portion of the city, big enough that the dozen or so other people helping with preparations were all far enough that Inyssa could barely tell them apart. There were a few Pokemon –mostly Budew and Tangela– helping here and there, but hers were the only ones fully evolved. Enma, Johnny and Shadi were back near the truck used to transport the equipment from the city to the outskirts of the marsh. Kuro –to his chagrin– was somewhere in the back of the stage being used to test the proper calibration and amperage of all the instruments. As for Bret and Steven…
"Prr-krii!"
Ah, right. She turned around to see Steven perched atop the stage girder, looking down at Bret and pecking at different spots to indicate where the Roserade needed to move the stage lights with his vines. He looked up and nodded, letting out a noise halfway between a hum and a heartbeat. Grass-types like him didn't have mouths, but they all communicated with the same kind of weird humming.
Inyssa looked at them work for a few more seconds before deciding that her rest had lasted long enough. She was a bit wobbly on her feet as she walked back to the truck and her arms throbbed with phantom pain, but for once she didn't feel like complaining; she almost liked it, in a way.
As long as I can help them out…
She might not have known why she'd come here to Pastoria, but she at least knew that her first course of action should be contacting Simone and the others. It'd been a pleasant night. Cheap pizza, even cheaper B-list horror movie and the kind of stupid fun that was only possible by turning off your brain alongside a few friends. Johnny, of course, had them all beat at that.
Last night was also when Simone mentioned the concert some of their other friends in town were planning for the weekend. Something to lighten up the mood a little. Get everyone's minds off the horrible shit happening everywhere. They'd all volunteered to help with preparations the next day, and while Inyssa had followed suit unsure of herself, she found that it was a lot less irritating than she'd imagined.
Then again, that's how it'd always been for her when it came to friends. The stark few she'd ever had, at least. She'd spend hours and days and weeks agonizing over if she really wanted to go out and hang out with them, and most importantly, if they wanted to hang out with her. Then when she inevitably ended up going, she'd have a blast. It happened every single time. Why was it so hard to remember that hanging out with friends was almost always worth it?
She kept walking. Her steps became firmer at the thought, less letting her feet fall against the ground and more putting force and determination into each step. She forced herself to look up from the ground.
Why had she come here? The more time she spent around Simone and the others, the closer she felt to the answer. At first, she'd been somewhat aghast at herself. These might very well be her –and everyone else's– last days alive. Shouldn't she be spending this precious time with Barry? Or, barring that, working toward the completion of their plan? Training her Pokemon, coming up with strategies, practicing with whatever remnants of Uxie's power still dwelled within her?
Instead, she'd come here. To do… what, exactly?
Uxie's words resounded through her mind.
You have never given yourself enough time to heal.
Was that what she was doing? She hadn't thought it possible. Despite Uxie's claims to the contrary, she had tried to rest and heal, in the conventional way. But even when she tried to force herself, her sleep was not sound, and food always made her nauseous. And even if she tried keeping her thoughts away from that darkness, that horrible anger pulsing inside her like a second heartbeat, no distraction was ever enough. Only Barry's presence could sometimes keep it fully at bay.
But as much as she loved him, she couldn't rely on him sorely for this. She couldn't stake her emotional wellbeing on someone else's presence.
And so… she'd come here. Far away from Fantina and her mother in Hearthome. Far away from Barry and Metchi in Sunyshore. And now, after last night…
Maybe that's what she needed, more than food and sleep. A moment to breathe. A day or two far away from the looming end of the world, far away from plots and schemes and secrets drenched in fire and blood.
That world had been her home for too long now. So long that she'd almost forgotten what the early days of her journey had been like. Seeing new places. Meeting new people. Battling not to save the world but for simple fun, and the betterment of herself and her Pokemon. The tenets of a true trainer. The ones she'd recklessly abandoned in her pursuit of a twisted, almost suicidal kind of heroism. And now that she'd finally caught up to it, she wanted nothing more than to go back to the simpler times.
Inyssa stopped for a moment, both to breathe in and to look around.
Here, she felt both like her older self and also so fundamentally different. Here, people laughed and smiled and kept on helping each other, carrying each other's burden, trying to help even with a burning Mt. Coronet and the possible end of the world in the horizon. Here, she felt…
A smile formed in her lips, to her own shock.
I… I feel good, she realized, almost unable to believe it. I feel stable. For the first time in… merciful Synn above, in how long?
She was no naïve girl anymore. This peace was nothing but the eye of the hurricane, the calm before the storm. The darkness and the anger would come back. And when they did, she doubted she'd feel as willing to smile as she was now. Regardless of how good she felt now, it would have no bearing on how much she would suffer when it all came crashing down sometime down the line.
But if it doesn't matter, isn't that all the more reason to be here? she thought. To enjoy it while it lasts?
She'd stay here until the concert was over. She'd spend her time with her friends and enjoy herself to her heart's content, searing it all into her memory. Searing it strongly enough that –when the pain and the darkness came– it would serve as a shield. A reminder of what she was fighting for. Of the warmth and laughter that had always been there, waiting for her to find them.
Was it escapism? She'd worried about that when she'd first realized the reason for her journey here, but somehow it didn't feel like that. Then again, she'd been wrong before.
Although… she thought as she almost reached the truck. There is another reason. Though I'll wait on Simone to spot something before I worry about that.
She looked up toward the truck and immediately frowned. Shadi was finishing hoisting another pair of cable coils over her shoulder –the only thing she could help with considering she had scythes for arms– but there was something wrong. As she put one of her scythes through the coil and raised it, her body tensed up and her mustache twitched erratically for a second, like the string of a guitar plucked with too much strength. The look of pain wasn't there anymore when she turned around, but Inyssa was no fool.
"It's okay, just leave it there," she said, hurrying to her side, a sudden knot forming in her stomach. "Someone else can carry it."
"Kri! Kri-kurii!"
Shadi turned to her trainer in protest, both her scythes and mustache humming like a tuning fork being struck. At first, Inyssa had thought it was the same every time she did it. But the more time she spent with her the more she could almost hear the distinct pitch and rhythm of each hum. Her cries all sounded the same. But by listening closely, she could sometimes make out the specific emotion and intonation behind that hum; it made her understand what a cry alone couldn't hope to convey.
Part of her wondered if Uxie's powers had something to do with it, or if it was fully the product of having spent so much time together. Inyssa liked to believe the latter.
This particular hum was one of irritation. Not at Inyssa, but at herself. Maybe Inyssa had such an easy time parsing it out this time because it was an emotion she knew painfully well. The feeling of your body failing you. The anger and shame that sprouted from being unable to do something everyone else could. She knew how it could eat away at you, and she would first pluck out her heart and feed it to a Gogoat before she'd let her Pokemon feel like that.
"Hey, it's alright. I know."
She unconsciously dropped to her knees to be at eye-level, a habit that had been with her since the beginning of her journey. Like this, she felt like she could understand her partners better.
She placed a hand on Shadi's shoulder and noticed her face tightening in an attempt not to flinch. The ligaments there still hurt. She'd taken her to the Pokemon Center as soon as the symptom had shown itself, but deep down she knew the diagnostic would be the same as back in Celestic. Her body was deteriorating; aging faster due to the strain of battling. What Inyssa had come up with back in Canalave had greatly slowed down that deterioration, but it wasn't a perfect solution. Unless Shadi could perfectly absorb or evade every attack that came to her –an impossible feat– this would keep happening.
Inyssa had to think of another, better solution. Until then, Shadi would not fight unless it was a matter of life or death.
"We came here to have a good time, didn't we?" Inyssa smiled. "You always want me to take it easy on myself, so now that I'm doing it, I can flip it onto you. Let's take a rest."
Shadi frowned and hummed for a short moment, but the vibrating melody disappeared soon after. She looked down and simply nodded. Inyssa knew the feeling; this wouldn't help right away, but it was a start.
"We can rub some of that iodine cream the nurse gave us on your shoulders," said Inyssa, standing up. "I…" She frowned. "Shit, I left it back at Simone's place, didn't I? Well, I guess we could go back now b–"
"Would some ice help?"
Inyssa yelped like a Glameow dowsed with cold water, and as she turned around she came face to face with the last person she'd ever thought she'd see back here.
"S… Sanbica?"
That long, silky purple dress laced with spiderweb-like patterns was unmistakable, as were the eyes of the same color that looked down at her, gleaming with a dangerous curiosity. Sanbica bowed her head ever so slightly and did a curtsey, pinching and lifting up the sides of her skirt. As she did so, Inyssa's eyes instantly went to the back of her palms. There it was, that black dot, same as with Fantina.
"I saw some people transporting bags of ice toward the freezers behind the counters." She pointed toward some of the makeshift bars on the other side of the clearing. "Maybe I could get some for your Kricketune's shoulder, if it would help."
Inyssa swallowed, her throat feeling suddenly dry. "It's… okay, we were gonna go back anyway." There was a pause. "Also what the fuck are you doing here?"
"I'm helping, of course."
"Helping with what?"
"My hands," she said, raising her hands open-palmed. "They need people to carry stuff, what else would I be helping with?"
Inyssa stammered to say something, but fell silent, eyes narrowing. Then she chuckled.
"You're fucking with me."
Sanbica sighed contentedly. "Good job, you figured it out faster than Tulip did, and she's supposed to be the skeptical one. Then again, she takes things way too seriously."
"Who?"
"Never mind that." Sanbica swatted the matter away with a wave of the hand. "I'd say us meeting here again is a nice surprise, but I'm a hack and a scoundrel, not a liar. There's a distinct difference. It is good to see you, though."
"I'm sure it is," muttered Inyssa, standing up. She produced a Pokeball in her hand. "Shadi, I'll let you out in a bit, alright?"
The Pokemon was returned to her ball before she had a chance to complain. Sanbica raised an eyebrow, amused.
"Interesting name for a Kricketune."
Inyssa turned and glared at her. "I'm serious. What are you doing here?"
"Be at ease, we are not here to sour your much-needed day off." Inyssa perked up. 'We'? "My coworker and I were just passing by when we heard of this little concert. And he, being the excitable human Pachirisu that he is, decided for both of us that we should help however possible." She let out a long sigh. "He loves music, you see. And a million other things."
"A coworker…" muttered Inyssa. "One of your Institute buddies, is he?"
Sanbica didn't look nearly as surprised as Inyssa had expected. "Ah… My mother's tongue has been rather loose lately, I see. I suspected it when you first realized it was me. That was too much caution and alarm in your eyes if you thought we'd only met once before."
"To be fair, you did insult me pretty thoroughly that time."
"There was a positive side to your Guardian Star," said Sanbica. "You just didn't stick for long enough to hear it."
"Yeah, I'm sure. So you're really not here for any of your evil schemes or anything?"
Sanbica raised her eyebrows, surprised. "Are we evil in your eyes, Inyssa?"
She was about to say yes, but paused. Fantina hadn't… explicitly told her to stay away from these people, in fact she'd said that they were of no concern to her and vice versa. Yet she had hinted at certain 'atrocities' the group had committed.
"Well, you specifically could stand to be less spooky," she finally said. "Besides, your lot clearly has a lot of power and influence, but you're doing nothing to help us save the world. That doesn't make you look good in my eyes."
"You're wrong. We have been helping, albeit in our subtle ways," grinned Sanbica. "Well, when I say 'we' I'm mostly referring to my coworker and I. The rest of us either don't care or are too busy with… other matters to be able to lend a hand."
Inyssa wasn't sure she believed that, but she didn't care enough to press her on it. "So you're on our side then?"
"That is an extremely dangerous assumption to make, especially for a Shockeyes," she warned her. "We are on our side. The end of the world, however, benefits us as little as it does you."
She couldn't really argue with that, so Inyssa just gave her a curt nod and folded her arms, still sporting an unsure look on her face.
"There's something you're not telling me," she said plainly. "What do you want?"
Again, Sanbica didn't look surprised, though something almost like sadness crossed her expression for a moment.
"I hate to bother you during your one day off from all this madness, Inyssa," she confessed. "I'm aware of you and your friends' mission, and of the danger you'll soon be throwing yourself against."
"…Right. You can see the future," Inyssa sighed. "Should I assume that you know literally everything about… everything? You know, to expedite the process."
"Ha. Such wonderful sass. You really do remind me of her," smiled Sanbica. "But again, you're wrong. I learned this through my coworker, who recently had a meeting with Cynthia. And I already explained this to Metchi, but I cannot 'see the future' as you describe it. I can sometimes catch glimpses, sensations. Even my most accurate form of farseeing, my prophecies, are not infallible. Do not make light of your own agency, Inyssa, for the easiest way for fate to be set in stone is to believe that it is."
Of course. Metchi had told her of Sanbica's sudden appearance back in that boat, as well of her cryptic messages and her even more cryptic explanation of how her powers worked.
"You haven't answered my question yet."
Sanbica hesitated for a moment. Then she reached into one of the pockets of her dress and grabbed something, though she didn't pull it out right away.
"If there were a way to avoid going on this mission… to seal Giratina away without risking your life and that of those you love, would you take it? Regardless of the price to pay?"
"What?" asked Inyssa, her voice dropping. "What are you talking about?"
Sanbica pulled the object out. At first, Inyssa saw nothing. Literally nothing, as though a black hole had appeared in her vision in the spot above the woman's palm. Then she blinked, and suddenly there was something there. An amber-colored gem the size of a Pokeball; its shape was indescribable, like a hundred sharp geometric shapes mashed together, overlapping over one another in the same space. Every time she blinked, said shape seemed to shift.
"T-that…" Inyssa's voice went thin, weak. "Why do you have that?"
"The Griseous Orb has always been ours," Sanbica explained. "It's… changed hands a few times in the past three years, but it always finds its way back to us. That's why I don't mind giving it away, if momentarily.
"This is the price of the bargain my coworker has struck with Cynthia. We are to lend her one of our relics, and she is to lend us one of hers in return. She's already fulfilled her part; it's only right I do the same."
Inyssa shook her head in confusion. "You... made a deal with Cynthia? And what is a relic?"
Sanbica pointedly ignored the first question. "It is simply how we refer to certain items steeped in the power of greater beings. We are in possession of quite a number of them, though not as many as we'd like. Cynthia has a couple of them. You have one too. But that is neither here nor there," she said. "I realized I'd have to give this away if we were to prevent Giratina's emergence, but now I wonder… if there's another way. I wouldn't necessarily call it a better option, but it's one worth exploring."
Her eyes snapped up to Inyssa, startling her. Something in her recoiled at the wrongness behind those pale violets.
"Inyssa," she whispered, her voice resounding like it did that one time, during their first meeting. "Would you like to become our Eight Stigma?"
No response came from her. She couldn't even process what she'd heard until the sheer absurdity of it hit her like a hammer to the face. And yet she didn't laugh. Because this clearly wasn't a joke; because there was no humor, no jest in those dark pools of purple that were Sanbica's eyes, so deep and vast that they almost resembled the World of Distortion. She had to look away before the remnants of Uxie's powers tried to make sense of that wrongness again, hurting her in the process.
In the end, all that came out was a single word. "Why?"
"It would stop Giratina, wouldn't it? And without having to jump into the heart of nothingness," said Sanbica. "There would be no need to get Shadi out. You would–"
Inyssa shook her head, eyebrows scrunching up. "No, I–I get that. Why… why me, though?"
She was avoiding looking at Sanbica's face, but the way her posture tightened told her she'd hit a nerve. This was a question she didn't want to answer. But instead of refusing to, she decided to give as many as she could.
"Why indeed?" she whispered. "It might be easier for all of us. We might be in desperate need of an Eight Stigma. One of your possible futures might be problem for us. Our boss might have insisted we ask you. Or perhaps there's another reason. All the previous ones are truth, or they might all be lies. Does it matter? I'm giving you the choice to save the world, here and now."
That had been a great demonstration of how to speak a lot without saying anything at all, and Inyssa didn't fail to notice how unlike Sanbica that was. And yet, something in her heart stilled. A knot formed somewhere deep in her stomach, making her feel sick. Her mind felt split in two; one half considering the offer, the other denying it outright.
"What…" She licked her lips, feeling them dry and cracked. "What would happen to me if I accept?"
Sanbica leaned back slightly, a shadow of a smile forming over her pale lips.
"You already know the answer to that, Inyssa."
Then, she extended her hand toward her. As the Griseous Orb got closer to her, Inyssa heard a void inside her mind, a sound like that of a heartbeat, only reversed. A pulse of nothingness. It synced up with her own heartbeat, both sounds cancelling out, making her feel as though it had stopped beating.
Almost a minute passed in that soundless void between them. There was something… peaceful about the emptiness she felt at the object's presence. A bliss. Its whisper was a familiar one, like a song she'd heard once long ago and had since forgotten. It sounded tempting, full of promises. Rest. Sleep. Peace, at last. An end to the pain, to the heat and anger that had chased her all her life, plaguing her mind like a waking nightmare.
It was the most wonderful apathy Inyssa had ever felt.
"I…"
She raised her own hand, slowly, fingers shaking. It hovered over the object for a few moments, ever so slowly dropping toward it. Her skin was so close she felt the phantom touch against its impossible surface.
Then, she remembered something. Words Metchi had told her not long ago. Her hand pulled back, but instead of recoiling she lowered it to the side and pushed Sanbica's own hand away, giving a miniscule shake of the head.
"'My worth is not determined by how useful I can be to others'." She quoted the words, then looked up defiantly at Sanbica. "My life is worth the same as everyone else's. I'm not throwing it away, even if it's to save the world. I'll take my chances with this fight."
"Some might call that selfish."
"I think I've earned that selfishness by now," she countered. "Wouldn't you say?"
Sanbica shone her a genuine smile, the emptiness in her eyes vanishing with her next blink. She didn't look disappointed or surprised. In fact, Inyssa could've sworn she saw the briefest flash of pride in her expression. She retracted her hand, saving the Griseous Orb back in her pocket.
"I don't think anyone could dispute that," she said. "I'm… genuinely sorry for springing up a choice of such importance on you out of nowhere. I figured you wouldn't take the offer, but I–"
"You had to try," Inyssa cut her off. "I get it."
Sanbica folded her arms, her expression growing soft. "How understanding. You've changed so much since we last met. It honestly warms my heart."
Inyssa recoiled at that, eyes narrowing into slits, a faded blush forming on her cheeks. "W-why would it? It's not like you like me or something. Aren't you in a death cult or something? Aren't yourself and your little horror club the only thing you care about?"
"I care about making money, first and foremost," she corrected. "Then I care about the Institute and my coworkers. And then… although I haven't been the best at showing it, I care about my family. Hence why."
"I… what?" muttered Inyssa, shaking her head. "What are y–"
"Considering our respective mothers' possible elopement looming in the horizon, is it any wonder I would want to look out for your wellbeing?" said Sanbica, and only then realization dawned on Inyssa, like a bucket of cold water being dumped on her. "Should I expect you to call me 'Big sis Sanbica' from now on, hmm?"
"Oh wow… I hate that," whispered Inyssa, more frazzled than disgusted. "I hate that so much, holy shit. Never, ever say something like that again."
Sanbica placed her hand against her lips and giggled. "So put it down as a 'maybe' then?"
"I think you should leave before I vomit from the sheer disgust I feel at that suggestion."
"Fair enough I guess," Sanbica shrugged. "I'm sorry for the intrusion, and thank you for humoring me for this long. I will be… hoping for your victory, as well as your safe return," she said. "But before I go, might I offer a small piece of advice?"
Inyssa frowned. "More of your future bullshit?"
"Nothing like that," Sanbica waved it off with a hand. "It's simply a glimpse I just got. A flash amidst the dark future that looms in the horizon." She cleared her throat, then spoke. "You will face to face with a choice soon, though it might not look like one at first. Choose the option that will let you sleep easier at night."
It didn't come as much of a surprise. Part of her wanted to roll her eyes and wave off the warning, but she figured that might come back to bite her in the ass. So instead she just gave a curt nod.
"I'll keep it in mind."
Sanbica nodded. "And with that, I will take my leave. Have–"
"W-wait."
The girl had already begun to turn around when Inyssa interrupted her. She stopped, but didn't look over her shoulder.
I'm going to kick myself later if I don't ask this.
"Just in case, to avoid any nasty surprises… do I know any more of your people?"
Sanbica's shoulders stiffened. She hesitated to answer, though only for a single moment.
"…You don't know any of the Stigma, though you've heard of one of us," she said. " Goodbye, Inyssa."
And with that she was gone, more swiftly than she probably intended, as though she wanted to leave as soon as possible. Inyssa hung back for a moment, thinking about what had just happened. The choice she'd been presented, Sanbica's warning, and…
Sister… That word hung heavy in her mind, shooting a shiver down her spine. She shook her head violently. Fuck no. My hands are already full with the one I have, no way I'm gonna accept anot–
Her Poketch rang. As she lifted her wrist, she saw that it was a message from Simone. She pressed the button and her eyes went wide at the words, a mix of fear and anticipation freezing her solid.
'our lil' starly's flwn to the nest ;3c'
'flowdn*'
'flown* fuck'
Pyxis saw as Simone finished texting whoever they were testing and then put the phone down and kept preparing something that smelled like tea. It'd been a few minutes since they'd dragged her here and tended to the wound on her hand. Simone's sister, a girl of Pyxis' age named Dya, had left for her room after a small while of unsuccessfully trying to play videogames on her phone comfortably while she lay on the couch. Now it was just the two of them. And yet the silence didn't feel heavy. It was… relaxing. So much so that Pyxis almost jumped when Simone spoke.
"Sorry 'bout that," they said. "Pal of mine said she was coming over and I had to text back. I'll try to have this ready quickly."
Simone's voice was rich and deep, like honey sliding down leather, and Pyxis was always a second late to reply, too busy basking in it.
"It's… it's fine."
"How's that hand holding up, by the way? Been a while since I did any first aid so–"
"N-nono, it's okay," Pyxis hurried to say. "Thank you… it feels a lot better now."
"That's good to hear."
Pyxis shrank into herself, sheepishly holding onto her bandaged hand. She'd had a few opportunities to excuse herself and leave, but hadn't taken any of them. It wasn't just Simone; it was also this place. It reminded her a lot of the house she'd grown up in, and that was the problem. A bit worn and tightly packed, more resembling a small apartment, but it was far warmer and cozier than the spacious, empty rooms back in Galactic HQ. The place was covered with little doodads and decorations most likely bought at the local craft market. A Sigilyph dream-catcher hung above the table, occasionally hitting her in the face with its feathers. A collection of wood-carved Turtwig rested atop the ant table in front of the T.V.
Maybe they're not bought, thought Pyxis. Their accent sounds Unovan, and those features… wouldn't surprise me if they come from a native family. Would explain those designs…
She looked over her shoulder. The wall behind her was plastered from top to bottom with pieces of paper of different sizes, each one bearing a distinct drawing or design, all hand-drawn. Judging by the multitude of tools and parts sprinkled over the living room table she was sitting next to, they must've been tattoo designs.
Pyxis kept looking around like a kid seeing their friend's house for the first time, because it beat having to think about what was happening. About her current situation. About the cold and dread trying to pull at her from her throat down to her stomach.
Synn above, why did this have to happen to her, and now of all times? Not just collapsing in the middle of the street. Someone like Simone, someone that nice and considerate and… ugh! Why did they have to find her!? At any other point in time Pyxis would've been delighted to meet someone like them, but right now kindness was the last thing she needed. Because kindness was the one thing that stifled that oppressive heat inside of her. And without it… all that was left was that cold, that apathy.
Without it, how could she do her job?
She glanced toward Simone again, then swallowed. Despite it all, she couldn't be mad at them even if she tried. How could she? Simone was the kind of stranger you accidentally bumped into in a supermarket while having a bad day, and their smile and the pat on the shoulder they gave you let you know that it was okay. That it would be okay.
Then again, that experience might not be as universal as she thought it was. Pyxis had a bad habit of momentarily falling in love with random people she ran into once and then never saw again. It was the kind of habit she could really do w–
Talking. Pyxis perked up, feeling a jolt. Simone was talking; she'd already missed half of what they were saying.
"-nd of a bother, I'll clean it up right away. Probably put them on the couch for the time being."
Pyxis blinked a couple times. "I'm… sorry, clean what up? I was kinda out of it for a second."
Simone let out a wonderful chuckle. "I don't blame you. I meant the tattoo equipment there; I know how bad it looks just sprawled everywhere over the table like that."
She shook her head, then realized Simone couldn't see her. "N-no, it's okay. I was… actually looking at them. I've never seen tattoo equipment before," she admitted. "You… er, I guess it'd be dumb to ask if you're a tattoo artist."
"There's no such thing as a stupid question. The people who'd have you believe that are assholes," said Simone. "And yeah, everything's a mess 'cause I'm in the middle of moving all my equipment and stuff to this hangar I'm renting now near the docks. Used to work here in the living room, but it was a pain for my sis. Small place. And I can't say I was a big fan of having every random asshole in town knowing where I live and what the inside of my house looks like."
Pyxis gulped, then looked down. "I-I'm sorry. For the bother."
"Hm?" Simone looked over their shoulder, confused. Then they laughed. "Oh, no honey, I don't mean you. I meant the kinds of guy that were… more eager for the artist than the artwork, let's say. That's as kindly as I can put it."
"O-oh…" Pyxis recoiled, making a disgusted face. "I'm… sorry you had to deal with that."
"It's alright. Most of the time it just came down to me giving them The Look. You know, the one that says 'I don't care how much business you bring me, I am not going to sleep with you'."
Pyxis laughed. "Can't say I know what that looks like."
"And hopefully you'll never find out," said Simone, then they slammed something on the kitchen table. "A'ight, here it is."
She was presented with a concoction that looked like if someone were told to make tea but accidentally switched the water to herbs ratio. It was served in the hollowed out gourd of a Belue berry and there was an iron straw sticking out of the tightly-packed leaves, over which Simone had poured out a bit of hot water from the thermos. Pyxis had never been a picky eater or drinker, and she was curious. Taking a sip, she expected the leaves to come through the straw, but they didn't.
"I was gonna say careful with the first sip. It's hot." Simone sat across from her, a tired smile on their face. "How'd you like it? I know it's not everyone's cup of tea."
Pyxis licked her lips. She'd drank all the hot water in only a few sips. "It's… bitter."
"Yeah, sorry I–"
"I love bitter," said Pyxis, smiling up at them. "I was expecting some sugar like with tea, but I'm glad there's none."
A surprised look crossed over Simone's face. They nodded absentmindedly and took back the gourd, pouring some more hot water in.
"Some people put sugar on it but… they're weird. I'm glad you like it, though. It's a local thing we make from this one herb that grows near the marsh," explained Simone. "It's real good at giving you a lil' boost of energy. Not as much as with coffee, but it lasts longer. Shame that only us Pastorians seem to like bitter."
Pyxis nodded. "Everyone thinks all bitter is the same, but that's like saying everything that's sweet tastes the same. There's depths to the flavor, and this one has a lot of it." She hadn't noticed, but she was getting into the conversation, the worries of a few minutes ago seeming distant. She was even smiling. "What's with the small serving, though? I only took a couple sips and it ran out."
"That's the idea. It's a drink to be passed around in a group of friends," said Simone. "Besides, the leaves get too mushy and lose their flavor if you pour too much water."
"I see… I like that." Pyxis smiled. "Wish we had this back at–"
She froze, a shiver of panic running down her spine. Shit, what did s–
"Your job?" offered Simone.
"Y-yes, my job. Yeah."
Thankfully, Simone did not press on the issue, nor did they ask what kind of job was it. They just nodded and took another sip, finishing it and then pouring some more for Pyxis. She gulped and took it from their hands, a hint of redness rising up her cheeks.
"Now I wish I knew how to make it," she muttered.
"The herb grows everywhere in Pastoria, and even if you don't feel like picking it up I know a few people that sell it packaged," said Simone. "You can look up the rest. That shit's all on the internet now; there's tutorials for everything, from growing your own farm to hotwiring a car."
"Speaking from experience?"
"I'll leave that up to your imagination."
"Heh. Thanks. I'll… keep it in mind."
She felt bad for lying to Simone like that. There was very little chance she would leave this city, much less alive.
"Anyway, I'm glad more young people like you like bitter," said Simone, leaning back on their chair. "It's not the kinda flavor you usually find in the supermarket. Whenever I go all they sell is fizzy, colorful drinks that taste like if someone had mixed half a pound of sugar with the insides of a glowstick. It's disgusting. I'm sure if it were up to the people running those markets they'd have us drinking processed sugar and eating frozen lunches and shit full of trans fats every day. Easy to process, easy to consume, no fuckin' flavor at all."
"Y-yeah. A friend of mine survived almost entirely on instant ramen and frozen pizza for as long as I've known him. Been telling him for a while to cut it out. Make some real food, y'know?"
Not like you'll ever see him again, a voice said inside her head. Orion already made it clear which side he's on.
Something froze in her throat. Keeping up the smile was a lot harder all of a sudden. Luckily, Simone didn't seem to notice, or if they did then they kindly didn't comment on it.
"Same for my sis and my buddy Zachary. He's such a bad influence on her…" Simone knitted their brows and sighed. "Still, not like it's the fault of people that buy that stuff. It's the fault of the assholes that make them so much cheaper than actual meals and ingredients. Had to buy them myself a few times. Sometimes the farmer's market is closed or you just don't have the money or the time to cook up a whole meal, y'know?"
Pyxis swallowed down the lump in her throat and nodded. That's how it'd been when she'd lived with her mother; healthy, homemade meals were a rare delicacy, not by choice but by necessity.
"Yeah… I know the feeling." She took another sip, rolling the bitter taste around the inside of her mouth before swallowing. "You must be extra busy now, with the moving and the concert and all that."
"You've no idea," they muttered. "But Zach asked me for help setting it up, and when a friend asks for your help you drop everything you're doing and help them out. That's the rules. Besides, my sister can get by for tonight. I made tripe hot pot yesterday and there's enough leftovers to feed a Snorlax."
Pyxis' expression softened. "Your sister's lucky. To have someone like you taking care of her."
The look of appreciation that crossed Simone's face, while brief and subtle, was like a splash of fresh water across Pyxis' weathered face. Immediately, her own smile returned. Simone just had that kind of face that made you want to make them smile.
"Dunno how much I can keep playing the role, though. She'll be eighteen soon. She must be looking forward to leaving this dump. Go on her trainer adventures and all that."
The next words left Pyxis' lips before she could process them. "Don't worry. No matter how far she travels or what crazy stuff she experiences, she'll always need you to be there for her. That's what family's for, right?"
"…Yeah. I sure hope so."
For a few seconds, Simone simply looked ahead, pensive, arms folded, as though mulling something over. Then they nodded and addressed Pyxis again.
"Thanks. You're… very kind," they said. "You know that, right Pyxis?"
Pyxis almost choked on the next sip. The hot water burnt her tongue and she had to put a hand over her mouth to cough, eyes tearing up from the sudden pain.
"Dear Synn above, are you allergic to compliments or something?"
Despite the teasing tone, there was no mock or malice in their voice. That, coupled with their previous comment and Pyxis almost asphyxiating from too much coughing, her face was as red as the shell of a Scizor.
"I'm not, I j-just… that took me off guard," she excused, grabbing the gourd closer and glancing away from them. "Y-you're one to talk. Who brought me here and bandaged my hand and gave me something to drink?"
Simone shrugged. "Anyone would've done the same."
"You don't believe that."
There was a moment of silence, then Simone let out a dry chuckle. "No, I guess not. But I'm not nearly as selfless as that'd lead you to believe."
Neither of them said anything for what felt like an entire minute. Pyxis had her suspicions from the moment that look of familiarity had crossed Simone's face, but for some reason she wasn't nearly as afraid or panicked as she should've been. Simone wasn't the kind of person that would turn her over. Still, it was time to come clear with it.
"You know who I am, don't you?"
Simone just nodded.
"Did you know when you came over to help me? When I collapsed?"
"I… no, not right away," they said. "I figured it out when I brought you back and got a good look at your face."
Pyxis smiled. "Then how can you call what you did anything but selfless?"
Simone didn't have a retort for that. Pyxis finished what was left of her drink before speaking again.
"I'm guessing you saw my 'daring' exploits on T.V.?"
"Not just that. But yeah, I definitely saw it." Simone let out a puff of air, shaking their head. "That took some guts. I've been in my fair share of shitty situations and I don't know if I could've done what you did."
"The secret is to be really, really fucking angry."
"Oh, I know, I've been there," said Simone. "You can always count on young people to use their anger productively."
Pyxis needed a moment to gather the courage and say the words she'd been meaning to say for a while.
"You… don't hate me?" she asked sheepishly. "Don't hate Team Galactic?"
Why do you care? she heard in her mind. You'll never see them again after you leave. What's their opinion worth to you?
A lot, for some fucking reason.
"Those are two very different questions," said Simone. "Are you, Pyxis, the entirety of Team Galactic?"
She didn't answer.
"Let's see… my pal Zachary's not a big fan, I'd wager there's no love lost between him and Team Galactic. His grandparents were caught up in the Veilstone attack. They got out unscathed, thankfully, but still."
Pyxis looked down, ashamed. "I'm…"
"My other pal Rory has a bit more sympathy for you guys. She's just that kind of person," they said. "And… well, I can't say I appreciate or agree with a lot of the things your people have done. Mt. Coronet, for example. Or the father of one of my friends being killed in a confrontation with someone affiliated with Team Galactic. All three of us are of the same mind on that.
"But then the other day… we saw you there. What you did, and what you said. I'm not the best at reading faces, but I know guilt and pain when I see it. You… didn't know, did you? None of you did."
Pyxis shrank into herself. "Does it make a difference?"
"It does to me," said Simone. "Let me guess. They offered you food, shelter and people who were of the same mind as you. Made you feel like you finally had the power to take back what had been taken from you. But all along, the people in charge didn't give a shit about you. All they needed was cannon fodder, and you were the perfect fit."
Shocked was a light way of putting Pyxis' expression just then. "H…how'd you–"
"Heard the story a million times before," said Simone. "The more amazing and outlandish these people's promises are, the more full of shit they are. Wish I'd known that when I was your age."
"I…" Pyxis swallowed, looking down. "Yeah. Me too."
Then, Simone did something that startled her and almost made her jump. They reached over and grabbed her hand with theirs, gently. A shiver ran up Pyxis' arm. When she looked up, eyes wide, she saw something in their eyes that made her seize up.
"I don't hate you. And neither does anyone I know," they said. "Hell, Zachary might be a bit cross if he met you, but he once made friends with a Luxio that tried to gnaw his leg off. I'm sure he'll warm up to you in no time."
"W-what? What do you m–"
"You might've made some mistakes, might've trusted the wrong people, but you never lost sight of what you wanted, did you? It might be just a side-effect of all the horrible things your superiors did, but…" They glanced for a moment toward the hallway leading to the rooms, then back at her. "…but at least that exposed to the surface the problems we've been clamoring about for so long. Who knows, thanks to you and the others that really believed in what they were doing… maybe by the time this all blows over I can send my sister on her trainer journey without bankrupting myself. That wouldn't have been possible before."
"I–I had nothing to do with that," Pyxis said defensively.
"Do you really believe that?"
Again, Pyxis said nothing. She was frozen, split into two feelings, both of them trying to pull her in different directions. Part of her wanted to get up and run. Leave. Go back to looking for Inyssa, looking for a way to end herself. But then… this felt good. Sitting here, having her hand held, being told that everything she'd done hadn't been for nothing. That she was… she was…
"I… I should leave," she said, voice shaking. "There's something I have to do."
Simone raised an eyebrow, but didn't let go of her. "Sure, I can let you go. But first you have to tell me, straight to my face, that I'm not going to regret it if you do leave. Swear it to me."
Pyxis swallowed. "I–I can't do that."
"Why? Do you really want to leave and do… this thing you have to do?" they asked. "Truly?"
"It doesn't matter what I want," said Pyxis. "This is the only thing I can do. It's just… right."
Simone sighed. They let go of her hand and leaned back against their chair, looking pensive. Pyxis took her hand back and unconsciously pressed it against her chest.
"Pyxis… have you ever seen a Pokemon die?"
"W-what!? Where did that come from?"
Simone paid no mind to her shock and continued. "I was… a few years younger than you at the time. This was before I left Mistralton, before I told my parents to fuck off and took my sister with me to Sinnoh. That day I was out on Route 7, exploring the forest like I usually did, trying to find cool sticks I could play with and pretend they were swords. Then I heard a whine. The cry of a Pokemon calling for help. I started running before I even realized what I was doing. After almost a full minute I get to this… clearing around a small pond there in the middle of the forest. I get there just in time to see this young Deerling jump into the water to escape the pair of Zangosse that were hunting him."
Pyxis listened, enraptured, despite still not understanding the point of this story.
"Of course, it's not like the Deerling could escape by jumping into the pond. All the Zangoose had to do was wait 'til he reached any part of the shore and jump him. The Deerling must've realized this, because he kept swimming in circles, crying out desperately for anyone to come help him. He couldn't hold on for long. The pond was too deep; he'd drown as soon as his strength ran out. And he must've gone too far from his pack because no other Pokemon came to his rescue. I was the only one there, the only one that could do anything. But I hesitated.
"What would you do in that situation? I felt bad, yes, but all my life I'd been instilled with the truth that the circle of life and death is something that can't be ignored or fought against, nor should we want to. Life dies in order to give more life. The Zangoose weren't hunting the Deerling out of cruelty. They probably just wanted to feed themselves and their family; did I have any right to intrude on that? A hundred more Deerling would die the same way when I weren't looking. Interjecting wasn't just pointless, it was disrespectful to nature itself."
There was a pause, and then Simone looked Pyxis straight in the eye. "So tell me, why did I do it anyway? Why did I run in and waved my stick at those Zangoose, scaring them away?"
Pyxis didn't even need to think to come up with an answer. She'd always known it.
"Because you felt bad," she said. "And you wanted to stop feeling bad."
"And that's all that ever mattered," said Simone. "That's the only reason I've ever needed. I don't care if it's right or wrong, I'll just keep doing things so that I can sleep easy at night."
Pyxis nodded. She… understood. A part of her did, at least. But regardless…
"Did you…" She swallowed. "Did you save that Deerling?"
Their nose scrunched up slightly, their expression sour. "No. Was too late by the time I got the Deerling out. So turns out I not only denied those Zangoose their food, but I also got scolded later when I told my dad what I'd done. It was the worst-case scenario."
"Doesn't that speak against your argument?"
"Not really. The only thing that experience taught me was to never hesitate again," Simone shrugged. "There's enough hurt and sadness to go around. I figured offering a helping hand when it's needed might count for something, even if it's just to make myself feel better."
Pyxis bit her lower lip. "Is that why you don't want me to go?"
"No, that's just 'cause I like you, and I'd like you to be my friend and attend the concert with me and my pals later tonight," they said. "Do I need a reason other than that?"
"I… left my actual friends to come here," said Pyxis, voice thin. "Why would I–?"
"Are they dead?"
"What?"
"Your friends," said Simone. "Are they dead? Did they say they never wanted to see you again?"
Pyxis leaned back, suddenly feeling her throat dry. No, as a matter of fact, they'd said the exact opposite of that. She didn't say it out loud, but Simone seemed to figure it out.
"Friends are there to forgive you when you do something dumb," said Simone. "So come on. Stay with us for tonight, then go looking for your friends. That way you'll at least get something out of your trip here."
"I…"
She opened her mouth not knowing what words would come out, which terrified, but she didn't actually get to say them. Just as she was about to reply, a knock came at the door. Pyxis jumped like a Spoink, tensing up. Simone looked toward the door and let out a sigh, getting up to go open it.
"I was hoping I could convince you before my friend arrived," they said. "Hopefully she can do a better job than I did."
"Wh–she? W-what are y–?"
The door opened, and suddenly Pyxis felt as though there was no more air in her lungs, nor in the room around her. Something cold and sharp sank down her throat to her stomach. A girl her age walked into the room, hands hidden in her pockets. She looked different than the last time she'd seen her, mostly due to the absence of her red coat and that stupid hat she always wore everywhere.
Inyssa walked into the room, then stopped a few feet from the table. She looked down at Pyxis, the gold of her eyes sending a violent shiver down the girl's spine.
"Hey," she said. "Long time no see."
There was a blur of movement. Pyxis almost knocked the chair over with how fast she stood up, hand reaching for her pocket, heart beating furiously in her chest. But a voice like a hammer stopped her before she could do anything.
"Pyxis."
She froze in place. Slowly, her gaze moved from Inyssa to Simone, who stood next to her with their arms folded under their chest. There was no anger in their face, but there was a warning.
"Inyssa is my friend," they said. "Same as you."
Reluctantly, not fully aware of what she was doing, Pyxis took her hand out of her pocket and stood there, eyes wide, breathing harsh. Her vision almost swam thanks to the violent mix of anger and panic running through her veins. When Inyssa spoke, she almost jumped again.
"Zach told me that the dock should be empty today. It's pretty close to here."
Pyxis blinked. "What?"
"We can talk there," said Inyssa. "In private."
And before Pyxis could speak or protest, Inyssa did something she'd never expected her to do. She unbuckled her belt full of Pokeballs and let it rest on top of the table, then walked away from it.
"Just the two of us," she said. "No Pokemon, no powers. You're free to try whatever you want, but I just want to talk."
She walked toward the door and stood there under the sill, back to Pyxis.
"Are you coming?"
Pyxis did follow behind her. Not because she fully agreed with the proposition, but because her mind was so paralyzed by a bright and confusing mess of emotions that her body took over, making her walk behind Inyssa practically on autopilot.
