Chapter 43: Jordan Sower – Existential Crisis


AN: Real quick, been thinking of making/hosting a discord server. I dunno if anyone would be interested or not, but I thought I'd put it out there… It'd give me and you guys better access to one another, a place to share stuff, ideas, and feedback, and other stuff, along with a place to chat... Lemme know if anyone thinks this would be a good idea...

Also, tomorrow is N7 day, and I'm hyped! Cross your fingers for ME Trilogy Remastered announcement! :)

Now, without further ado: Jordan's Loyalty Mission.


Serpent Nebula, Widow, Citadel, Normandy, Comm Room.

April 5th, 2185. 1:22 am. EST

The Comm room was both unnaturally yet expectedly silent as the many crewmates stood around the holographic table. At the far end near the corner stood a chair, with Cynthia Wake sitting upon it as she looked upon the other inhabitants of the room with a mixture of fear and awe. Her arms were restrained with omni-cuff behind her back, with extra additions to counteract any use of biotics by the woman. She gave no attempt at breaking free or attempting conflict with anyone else in the room, yet was still regarded as a serious threat.

Miranda crossed her arms on her chest with a frown on her face, eyeing both the Commander at the end of the table close to Cynthia and Cynthia, herself.

Another moment later, Shepard finally shattered the silence, looking to both Miranda and Jordan Sower, who seemed to have had prior experience with the young woman. Brian, too, appeared to recognize her, but did not make it overtly obvious.

"Let's start from the beginning." He began, looking at Jordan and Miranda again, before turning toward the rest of his team, "I've read through a report near the beginning of the mission pertaining to Cynthia Wake thanks to Cerberus. According to the file, she was a threat to both Cerberus and the Illusive Man, himself, and was killed in combat." At that announcement, a squeak of shock and confusion came from Cynthia, but he continued, "Most of the information is lost to me at the moment, but I'm sure Sower and Lawson will be able to discuss their prior dealings with this woman."

"B-but, I've never met either of them in my life." Cynthia forced out, "I… I have n-no idea what you're talking about…"

Jordan looked over at the woman and felt an unnatural amount of hatred surge within him towards her, before he squashed the feelings down quickly, having recognized them as foreign. (Likely thanks to the Catalyst.) He turned to Miranda and motioned towards her, "I encountered her far later than you did. You want to start?"

Miranda nodded, "Early 2182, contact was made between a Cerberus agent and Cynthia Wake, the former reporting that the latter had information for Cerberus that could shift the balance of power within the Galaxy. Intrigued by this, the Illusive Man sent myself to investigate the claim and talk to this woman without a public record of any sort." She told them, "Shortly thereafter, Cynthia Wake was recruited and joined Cerberus."

"Damn, Princess. You recruited a traitor. You must be so proud." Jack said, earning a glare but no visible nor verbal response from Miranda.

Jordan decided to cut in, adding to her background, "Fast-forward to 2183, and I had just been handed over to C-Sec by Commander Shepard." He said, looking over to said man, who nodded at the remembrance, "I was interrogated by both Miranda and Cynthia, where I'd first met Cynthia." Brian looked like had wanted to say something, but didn't, "It was there, right away, that I'd realized something wasn't right. I didn't know there were other Avatars yet, but things were starting to come together…" he turned to look at Cynthia with a hardened gaze, before turning back toward Miranda, "She'd been controlling Miranda, and had been able to subconsciously gain her complete trust."

Miranda internally shivered as she looked back upon her memories. In hindsight, she'd been recruited and promoted at an astonishing rate, and her gaining her own and the Illusive Man's trust so easily and completely was terrifying. She'd had so much control over her that it'd taken Jordan's threat over her sister to actually break her free.

After Jordan, Miranda added to the story, "After the events of the Battle of the Citadel, Jordan Sower was kidnapped by Cerberus Agent Kai Leng, and forcibly transported to a Cerberus base designated as Chronos Station." Cynthia's jaw dropped as she listened to the story, almost absolutely convinced that this was all made up, except for the fact that everyone looked serious. "It was on that station that a confrontation occurred between the three of us, and her true nature was revealed."

"That's all wrong!" Cynthia interrupted, "I just woke up a few days ago!" She told them, desperate honesty written on her face and inscribed in her tone, "I haven't done any of that."

Jordan sighed, "My synthesized body records my memories." He said out of nowhere, "Allow me to share her own words…" He put both hands down onto the table and began to glow green, hijacking control of the display as new holograms came to life. It showed the past through Jordan's own eyes.


Recorded: March 6th, 2183. 5:03 pm.

Jordan was being held up by a blue coating of energy, rippling biotics keeping him suspended from the ground and against a wall as he stared into the harsh blue glare of Cynthia.

"What happened?!" She screamed at him in disbelief, "HE REFUSES TO BE IN MY PRESENCE! He's of suspicious me! ME?! I've done nothing but further Cerberus' agenda, and this is how I'm repaid?!" He demanded and questioned, outraged.

"Answer me, Avatar!" She screamed at him, now closer with her hand on his throat. "What did you tell him in that room?!" She said, her hand now on his throat beginning to squeeze.

Jordan was struggling against her hold, while she simply smiled at his attempts, "I…" He choked out, "I warned him about his indoctrination." He finally replied.

Her gaze, somehow, had grown harsher as her eyes began to glow brightly, "YOU WHAT?!" She yelled again, "Do you have any idea what the fuck you'd done?"

Another voice spoke, drawing both Jordan and Cynthia's attention. It was Miranda, who seemed uncharacteristically meek and quiet, "Saved the Illusive Man from a fate worse than death?" She questioned.

Turning back toward her, Cynthia held out another hand toward Miranda. Dark blue tendrils of energy extended from her hand and wrapped around Miranda's body. "What did you just say to me, Lawson? Did you just question me?" Wake put harshness and power into her tone.

Miranda, who'd been struggling for a moment against the energy, suddenly stopped and shook her head firmly, "No ma'am."

Jordan's eyes widened, "My God…" He said, "You're controlling here… J-just like…"

"About time you figured it out, Avatar. Let me guess, you're the Avatar of Synthesis, aren't you?" She asked, sarcasm in her tone as she spoke down on him, "Well, you're looking at the chosen champion of Control. I am the Avatar of Control. The one, true way to save the Galaxy."

Attempting to shake his head, Jordan replied, "Y-you're insane…"

"You don't understand anything, do you?!" She snarled at him, "Controlling the Reapers is the only solution! The Illusive Man knows it! Shepard knows it. Even the goddamn Catalyst knows it!" She declared with certainty, "And you just HAD to go and try to change things, didn't you?!"

Suddenly, the biotics released Jordan just after Cynthia took a few dazed steps back. A flurry of sparks from a weak overload erupted on her chest as she looked to Jordan, enraged. She shook in anger, but turned and left the cell he was in, with a curtain of kinetic barriers erupting between herself and the room. Miranda and Jordan were now left alone in the room.

"Miranda, watch Jordan." She ordered, "If he tried anything, shoot him. I think it's time for a… change in management…" She said ominously, leaving the two of them behind.

Jordan took a step forward, just as he heard the sound of a weapon unholstering and unfolding. He froze and his eyes darted to Miranda, who now had her weapon trained on Jordan's head. "Not another step, Sower." She said neutrally, "I will not hesitate to kill you."


Everyone watched the scene in silence, the room still quiet as the projected memory faded away. Almost as one, the entirety of the room turned to look at Cynthia Wake, who was doing her best to become as small as humanly possibly. She shook her head with a dropped jaw, her face pales in shock.

"Th-that's not p-possible…" She stuttered, "I just woke up recently…"

Brian interrupted, turning to Jordan, "According to my memories, the three of us first met and saw each other back in 2182, waking up together. Then, you claim to not remember that, and that you woke up many months later, alone." He tells him, before turning to Cynthia, "And now she claims not only no memory of waking up when I did, but that she woke up recently and denies everything she's done?" He looked back at Jordan, "Not to call either of you a liar, but could it be possible the Catalyst did something to both of you?"

"Wait!" Jack shouted, "Just who the fuck is the Catalyst, again?"

Brian replied easily, "A person who modified us, and clearly messed with our heads."

Cynthia became brave for a moment and spoke up, "I promise, that I have no memory of doing any of that." She said to Jordan and Miranda, "I just woke up recently, told by that damned Catalyst that I'd been changed for the purpose of Controlling the Reapers, but I refused his claims. As soon as I got out, I knew I needed to find and speak with Sh- Commander Shepard." She told them.

"And why did you need to speak with me?" He asked, crossing his arms.

At that, Cynthia paled once more, unable to give an answer aside from discussing the Mass Effect series.

He shook his head, "If you're not going to be cooperative, then what are we going to do with you."

"We could hand her over to Cerberus." Miranda offered.

"I'd say no." Garrus cut in, "But speaking of Cerberus, didn't you say that she was killed on one of your stations?" He asked.

Miranda nodded, "Yes, I oversaw the team that even took her body away."

Jordan's eyes widened, "And you requested that her body be frozen in cryo." He stated, surprising Miranda.

"How-?! How in the hell did you know that?"

Jordan shook his head, "Doesn't matter. What does matter, is that fact that she's very much alive over here." He motioned toward the captive woman, "Why don't you send a message to TIM, or whoever you need to… and see what happened to the body…"

Shepard nodded, "That would be a good place to start." He then looked up and over the crewmembers, all which were gathered in the room with him. He sighed, "This doesn't seem especially important for most of you at the moment, so I'll make this quick. Miranda, Jordan, Brian, stay behind, the rest of you are dismissed. Go get some sleep, and I'll update you all on any developments. As of this point, Shore Leave is NOT canceled, but you're all on-call just in case."

Most nodded and left, while a few hesitated. In the end, they all complied, leaving only their captive and the four of them in the room.

Miranda pulled up her omni-tool and went to work, putting in a request for an update on information pertaining to Wake and her body. Once she finished, Shepard coughed, getting their attention. He turned to Cynthia Wake, "You wished to speak with me, and obviously some unforeseen circumstances have come up. You'll be staying aboard the Normandy under watch in the brig for the night. We'll talk once everything is figured out. You will comply, or I'll personally hand you over to C-Sec. Understood?"

Cynthia quickly nodded, "Yes sir."

"Good." He said with a small smile, before turning to the other three still in the room, "You three, go get some sleep. We'll meet back here first thing in the morning to discuss any updates on the situation."

"Yes, Commander," Jordan said, as the others agreed, too.


Serpent Nebula, Widow, Citadel, Normandy, Comm Room.

April 5th, 2185. 8:01 am. EST

"No. Fucking. Way." Cynthia said, her eyes widening as tears built in her eyes. Silently, the other four were thinking the exact same thing.

On display in the Comm Room was a live feed of Cynthia Wake's corpse, frozen in cyro aboard an unnamed Cerberus Station. Her once-blue eyes were hazel, contrasting harshly with the glowing blue eyes the Cynthia in the room had. Without a shadow of a doubt, there was Cynthia, dead, while also alive and in cuffs aboard the Normandy.

Shepard frowned, feeling bad for the young woman before him. Was she a clone, or was the other one a clone? How did this happen?

Jordan broke the silence after a moment, "You woke up, when, again?"

Cynthia, still in shock, took a moment before answering, "J-just a few days ago…" She trailed off.

"And the Catalyst, did you see it?"

She nodded, "He greeted me when I woke up."

The choice of terms and words confused both Shepard and Miranda, but they did not voice these concerns quite yet. Miranda motioned toward Cynthia, "And what do we do with her, Commander?"

"I'm not sure, yet." He admitted.

"P-please, I want to stay and help you. I have nowhere else to go."

"Where did you exit the tunnels from?" Jordan kept pushing, ignoring what Cynthia said once again.

She frowned, looking over at him for but a moment, "Somewhere on the Presidium."

Jordan turned toward Shepard after getting his answers, "Shepard, I have a request."

He turned toward the Avatar of Synthesis, "A request?" He asked, before looking over at Cynthia, "Is it about her?"

"Partially, but not quite." He shook his head, "I have something personal I'd like to take a look at while we're on the Citadel. Something that needs to be done."

"I see…" He narrowed his eyes, "And what would that be?"

Jordan sighed and took a deep breath. How was he going to phrase this without looking suspicious? "You remember what I told you and the crew about the Catalyst, or rather the Intelligence, right?"

Shepard nodded, crossing his arms, "Are you willing to share more information with me, now?"

Sower nodded seriously, "Well, as I said, the Intelligence, or Catalyst, was the one that genetically modified and experimented on myself, Brian, Cynthia, and the other Avatar, making us who we are. The problem is that my memory puts me at a different spot and time than Brian's memory puts him. Now, with Cynthia's account, she's claiming a different, third timeframe AND there's two of her." He told Shepard, "The Catalyst is responsible for a lot of what we are, but even we aren't sure how much of us is natural and how much is artificially added…"

Shepard nodded, "I'm sure that's very disconcerting, Jordan." He said with a small frown.

Jordan nodded sadly, "Indeed… Anyway, up until this point, I was fine with waiting on discovering the truth about myself until we got to Rannoch, where the Geth could help. Now, though…" He motioned toward Cynthia, "Something about this doesn't sit right with me. I want… no, I need to find the Catalyst and get some answers."

Miranda narrowed her eyes and spoke, "That sounds well and good, but where would you find this Intelligence? And, if I'm not mistaken, you speak of this thing as if it isn't a person." She pointed out.

Jordan cringed, "Yeah… that's because the Catalyst/Intelligence is actually an AI." He finally admitted. Brian, who'd been remaining silent, glared at Jordan but did nothing to argue against it or stop him.

Shepard and Miranda were both shocked, both exclaiming disbelief.

"What?"

"How?"

Brian took over and nodded sadly, "It's true, the thing that made us the way we are… that experimented on us and altered us… it's an AI. A twisted, demented artificial intelligence…"

Miranda breathed out, "But what specific interest would it have in answering the Reapers…?" She asked.

"It created them." Jordan answered quietly.

Shepard's eyes widened and locked onto Jordan's, "It what?" He asked, "This 'Catalyst created the Reapers? Why? And why would it look into the destruction of the Reapers if it created them?"

"I… I can't explain everything just yet." Jordan said sadly, before seeing the look in Shepard's eyes. He quickly continued, "I'll explain everything, I promise, but I need to confront it if I'm ever going to understand anything. I don't even understand it all, yet. That's why I need to figure this out and confront it! Once I understand more, once I'm sure of the truth, I'll tell you everything I know." He admitted.

Shepard locked eyes with Jordan, frowning but maintaining a neutral expression, "Do you know where to find it?"

Jordan gave a half-shrug, "Kinda. I know about where to look, and I could probably get its attention…" He trailed off.

Shepard crossed his arms, looking around the room between the four of them. Jordan looked apprehensive, but his eyes were pleading and begging him for this opportunity. Miranda looked shocked and curious, wanting to know more as well, but cautious at this turn of events. Cynthia looked depressed, but a hopeful gleam was in her eye about potentially learning and figuring out more about herself. Brian tried to look indifferent, but was clearly invested in this as well, but without the despiration in Jordan's eyes.

Finally, Shepard sighed and spoke, "I will accompany you on this mission." He stated simply, "We're going to figure this out together, and we'll have Spectre Vasir accompany us as well. You mentioned the Presidium and the Keeper Tunnels, so I assume that's where we'll be looking. You'll need a Spectre with you at all times, but both of us will be able to make sure there are no problems." He told him, before turning to Miranda and back to Jordan, "Also, we'll notify the crewmates about the mission and its importance, and the feed from our helmets will broadcast back to the ship for anyone who wants to watch. Is that fair?"

Jordan considered it for a moment. On one hand, he needed to find and talk to the Catalyst. He had a growing worry and fear in his heart as he began to imagine more and more scenarios to explain what was happening, and needed to know the truth; for better or for worse. On the other hand, the entire crew would be watching what he, Tela, and Shepard did, and the truth about Mass Effect could possibly be revealed or hinted at. He wasn't sure if he was ready for everyone to know at once, especially with what was kinda-sorta going on with Tela…

And then, of course, there were the other Avatars. Cynthia wanted to help Shepard and the Normandy in any way she could, and she had nowhere else to go since she'd not exactly from this universe. That being said, she really has no use to Shepard and the crew aside from her knowledge of the future (however accurate it may still be), and she was untrained currently with her Biotics. Honestly, if she really wanted to help, the best thing for her to do would likely be to train for now and prepare to help during the Reaper War.

Brian, of course… he'd confronted Jordan last night before he'd made it back to his room to sleep. He'd be vehemently against telling Shepard the truth about the Avatars, but realized that may no longer be an option with Cynthia's arrival. He'd been confused at her reappearance as well, and mentioned that the three of them and the fourth Avatar all woke up in early 2182 together, so her claiming the contrary was alarming, especially for Jordan. But, he tried not to think too heavily about that, at least, until he confronted the Catalyst.

His fears were growing the longer he thought about his origins and the Catalyst, so this needed to be dealt with ASAP.

Finally, after thinking for a moment, Jordan replied, "I'm ready." He said with a nod.


Serpent Nebula, Widow, Citadel, Presidium.

April 5th, 2185. 9:48 am. EST

The squad exited the Skycar and stepped out into the Presidium, ready for their mission. Together, led by Commander Shepard, Jordan Sower and Tela Vasir were both ready to try to figure out the truth behind a second Cynthia's appearance and whoever this 'Catalyst' was.

After alerting the crewmates and telling them about the mission parameters, the three of them had set off. The rest of the crew members were told that the one behind the Avatars was called either the Catalyst or the Intelligence, and that Shepard, Tela, and Jordan were going to confront it and figure out the truth behind it all. Shepard told them the Catalyst was an AI, much to everyone's shock and anger, especially when they considered what it'd done to them all, and told them that this 'being' was possibly the original creator of the Reapers, too.

With that information dump, many of them decided to stay in the Comm Room to watch the mission remotely, eager to learn the truth. In fact, all but Mordin stayed in the room to watch, while Mordin worked in the Lab with the feed being broadcast to a monitor in the room with him.

Together, the three of them made their way nonchalantly toward a nearby alley, where Keepers were walking back and forth near and within it, working at various stations. There were holographic signs warning about the Keeper Tunnel entrance, telling everyone that entry within was not permitted without express permission from authorities. It even logs entry and alerts C-Sec to any intrusions, which could be overridden by only a Spectre.

Jordan recalled his original exit from the Keeper tunnels, leaving a similar alley. The difference, though, was that there wasn't normally an entrance/exit in that location, and was only opened for Jordan to leave, before the Keepers quickly closed it after he'd left. If he'd left through a place like this, well… that would have been a real bad start to his adventure.

Watching Shepard, the other two saw him approach the display and wave his omni-tool, which caused the signs to flicker and die for a moment, before turning green, rather than their original orange.

"We're good to go." He informed them, "Ready?"

Jordan sighed, "As I'll ever be."

"C'mon, we got this." Tela said with a confident smile, bumping his shoulder lightly.

Tela had reacted fairly well to all of this, all things considered. Sure, she'd been shocked to learn about the Catalyst, and he'd even sworn that he saw fury in her eyes when he recalled what the Catalyst had done to him and the other Avatars. She easily agreed to accompany Jordan and Shepard on this 'adventure', and was eager to learn more about this AI.

Together, the three of them stepped by a few Keepers and entered the tunnel.

The tunnel was dark, as expected, prompting the three of them to turn on the flashlight functions on their omni-tools before trekking any further. Once on, the three continued, deeper and deeper into the tunnel, which lightly sloped downward. As they walked boxes and crates filled with random and unknown objects were passed by. Occasionally, a Keeper or two would pass by without so much as a glance at the three of them.

Despite there being no one else, and the Keepers ignoring them, they all felt as if they were being watched, and not just by the Normandy Crew. Soon enough, they reached a small room with three different hallway exits they could take, all going in their own directions. The three paused in the center of the room and turned to look at Jordan.

"Any clue where to find this thing?" Tela finally asked, motioning toward the three hallways. Jordan was eerily glowing green thanks to his scars, eyes, and lines of cables beneath his skin. In the dark, he could almost appear to be similar to a husk, though much livelier and less evil. The comparison was only there with glowing lines and eyes.

Jordan sighed, pulling up his omni-tool to give them an approximate location of where they were on the Citadel. They were beneath the Presidium, walking in a direction parallel to the Citadel Tower. He pointed at the tower on the map and then pointed to the left tunnel.

"The Catalyst, as far as I remember, prefers to be close to the Citadel controls and override station," Jordan said.

Shepard narrowed his eyes at him knowing about that, but brushed the concern away for the time being, "Which is at the tower?" He asked, knowing the answer.

Jordan nodded, "Yes, but it's also believed that there's another console deep beneath the tower, only accessible through the Keeper Tunnels."

Tela nodded, "That'd make sense. If there was a secondary console, it'd be in a place no one would go, yet still close to the original."

"Exactly, so I'd wager we'd have the easiest time finding it if we go left."

"Alright, left it is," Shepard replied, leading the other two down the left tunnel.

As they walked in silence, they noticed the tunnel slopping down once more, bringing them deeper and deeper into the Citadel. After a moment, Shepard decided to speak and ask some questions, which Jordan expected. It was a Loyalty mission after all, wasn't it?

"So, what's the plan, here?" He asked him, "You were rather set on confronting this 'Catalyst', but how are you going to go about doing this?"

Tela nodded in agreement, "My thoughts, exactly. I assume we're not going to kill this thing."

Chuckling, Jordan shook his head, "I dunno if we even could kill it. And even if we could, the Reapers don't answer directly to him, so it wouldn't really do anything to help us." He said, before continuing, "As for a plan, well… I know what I need to ask, and based on my prior experience with the thing, it likes to talk and explain how inherently right it is in what it's doing."

"So getting it to talk should be simple."

"I'd like to think so. The hardest part would probably be finding it." Jordan said, "Why do you think no one's found or talked to it before aside from me and the Avatars, despite it living on the Citadel? If it doesn't want to be found, it won't be." He said simply.

"Then how do you plan on making it want to be found?" Tela asked.

"It's got a sort of obsession over me and the avatars since he was responsible for what we are, now," Jordan said, internally cringing as he thought of what the Catalyst has done and what it may have done. "But, I think he's got an increased interest in me."

"Why do you suppose that is?" Shepard asked, "Are you a favorite of it?"

Jordan chuckled, but wasn't smiling, "Maybe not me, but what he changed me to be." He said with a frown, "I'm the Avatar of Synthesis, a perfect blend of man and machine. Organic and Synthetic. Its preference is to get me to make the entire galaxy like me. The Geth, humanity, Asari, Reapers… everything and everyone."

"And if someone says no?" John questioned.

"To the Catalyst, your opinion is irrelevant."

"Damn, sounds like a good guy, huh?" Tela remarked sarcastically.

"Exactly." Jordan said, "I will help all that I can, but I'm not his puppet. And I certainly don't want the Reapers sticking around to try another Harvest another time. The Reapers MUST be destroyed!" He said with passion.

"My thoughts exactly," Shepard replied with a smile.

They lapsed into silence for a moment before Shepard spoke again.

"Tell me about Brian." He asked, getting both of his teammates to turn toward him, "You told everyone about your interactions in the past with Cynthia, and we've talked about Brian before, but I'd like to know more about you two."

Jordan shrugged, "I don't have much for you, unfortunately. I met him for the first time with you guys when we stormed the Olympus Hotel and defeated the Talons."

"He's the Avatar of Oblivion, yes?" Shepard asked, "His supposed goal is to allow the Reapers to win, where they can be dealt with in the future, right?"

"Supposedly." Jordan said, "He seems decent enough, and we both hate what our supposed 'purposes' are, so we have that in common. We both want to help you in your mission as best as we can. But…" He sighed and looked Shepard in the eye, "Whatever the Catalyst did to us, we have some sort of built-in hatred and distrust toward one another." He admitted.

"And Cynthia." Tela voiced, which Shepard nodded since he was thinking the same thing, "What about her?"

"If you mean that you think that there's something that makes me and Brian not like her either, then I think you'd be correct. Back when I'd interacted with her with Cerberus, I didn't like her at all, and the feeling was mutual. Looking back at it, it was almost like my entire being wanted to be against her. I taunted her and worked to undermine her, and she worked to undermine and use me. Honestly, there was likely a lot of that kind of influence that forced us into that life-or-death battle with her with Miranda."

Shepard frowned, "And you and Brian, have you been better with him? I don't need any more fights to break out among my crew."

Jordan nodded, "I'll admit that as much as I want and try to form a better relationship with him, it's hard, but we're working at it. We're not constantly at each other's throats, so that's a win in my book."

Eventually, the three of them reached another room with two hallways this time. This time, Jordan wasn't sure which way to go, as they both led in the same general direction seeing as it was more of a fork in the tunnel, rather than a large room with different directional exits like last time.

"Which one, now?" Tela asked.

"When in doubt…" Jordan said, before pointing at the one on the left, and moving his finger, "Eeny, meany miny moe…" He trailed off, before pointing at the right tunnel, "Right's gotta be right, right?" He said with a grin, trying to lighten the mood. They shook their heads but decided to just go with it and went right.

They went a bit deeper before entering another large room. This one was different than the last few in a couple of different ways. This room's ceiling was much, much higher, and a few artificial lights were scattered around the dull, grey walls, illuminating the room. There was another three that exists in opposite directions in the room, likely branching deeper into the tunnels. Several Keepers were working on different panels and consoles, with a single Keeper standing in the center of the room, staring directly at Jordan.

It was kind of unnerving, seeing the odd creature seeming to take an interest in the Avatar.

In the back of Jordan's mind, he heard a familiar, artificial voice speak. "Left. Alone." The Catalyst seemed to whisper into his brain, the feeling foreign and uncomfortable. Jordan turned and saw some light come from the left hallway at the end, which seemed to be another room.

Jordan didn't know why he entertained the thought of meeting with the Catalyst alone. Maybe it was because of the idea of others learning about Mass Effect and himself was not a good one. Maybe it was because he figured this was his best and only chance to get some real answers after all of this time. Maybe it was because the catalyst had some sort of control over him, especially being so close to the source…

Either way, Jordan decided that he could do this, completely forgetting that the crew back on the ship was watching and listening to the three of them thanks to the helmet cameras.

He motioned toward the left hallway, "I see some light over there, but it seems to be in the wrong direction. I'm gonna check it out real fast." It wasn't a lie. If they kept going with the current thought that they needed to get closer to the base of the tower, then they would need to continue straight ahead, not left.

Shepard nodded, "Come right back, and report what you find. Vasir, check to the right, I think I see a bit of light there, too."

Agreeing, the elder Spectre turned to the right and stalked away, while Jordan went to the left. As soon as he started moving, the singular Keeper watching him turned away and walked to an unused console to begin some kind of work.

Jordan disappeared down the hallway as Shepard looked around, intrigued by the Keepers and this little 'hub' they had deep in their tunnels.

After a moment, Tela returned, shaking her head, "I think the right tunnel leads back toward the Presidium. There's a lot more light coming from that direction, and I think I even saw a bit of the artificial skyline."

Shepard nodded, "That's good. Another exit from these tunnels. Once Jordan gets back, we'll go deeper and see if we can find this damn AI."

That's when a loud bang echoed through the room, the sound originating from the left hallway, the sound being a door sliding and slamming shut. Turning toward the noise, the two Spectres were no longer able to see the light from the room, since it was now sealed off. Eyes wide, they both immediately began running toward the door, Shepard immediately trying to communicate with Jordan.

"Sower, can you hear me? What's going on?!" He called over comms.

No response.

Either he wasn't responding purposefully, or they lost connection. He called the Normandy as they were both nearly at the door.

"Shepard to Normandy, anyone have eyes on Sower?"

"Miranda, here. Shepard, we can still see and hear from Jordan's helmet, but his comms seem to be switched off."

"Dammit!" Shepard called, banging on the door. It wasn't even at the entrance from the room, if his memory of the glance he sent down the hallway was accurate. This door had sprung up in the center of the hallway, cutting off over a dozen meters of hallway and the entire room beyond. "Tela, get this door open."

"I'm trying." She said, typing into her omni-tool rapidly, "It's ignoring all commands. It's gotta be the fucking AI, it's locking us out!"

"Give me a sit-rep!" Shepard called into his comms as he tried to figure out how to open the door. "What's happening in there?!"

Miranda replied, "He's… he's talking to some kind of holographic child." She told him, before trying to give them a play-by-play of what was happening in the room beyond.


Serpent Nebula, Widow, Citadel, Presidium, Keeper Tunnels.

April 5th, 2185. 10:29 am. EST

Jordan Sower stood mere feet from the holographic display of the Catalyst, ignoring the sound of the door slamming shut behind him. The creator of the Reapers maintained a neutral expression in the dark room, with only a Keeper or two keeping them company in the isolated chamber within the Keeper Tunnels beneath the Presidium. He was isolated from the rest of the team aiding him on his 'Loyalty Mission', be Jordan couldn't be bothered with that right now, especially with everything going on inside his head.

The silence was unbearable to the Avatar of Synthesis, yet he didn't dare break it. Luckily, he didn't have to as the Catalyst spoke first.

"You were searching for me." It said simply, "Why?"

Jordan's expression shifted into a snarl, "You know very well why I've come." He said in anger, pointing somewhere behind him towards the direction he'd come from, "What the hell happened with Cynthia? She died."

"Yes, she did." It replied evenly, "Yet you have just encountered her, have you not?"

"How is she back when she died? I watched her… I listened to her as she died…" He said, his voice getting smaller and smaller as he finished. "What did you do to her?" He finally asked, "What did you do to US?!"

"You are my Avatars." The Catalyst answered after a moment, deciding that it'd prefer to see what happens when it humors the Avatar of Synthesis, "You were chosen and created to serve your purposes."

"Chosen? Created? Purpose?" Jordan asked, focusing on those three words.

"Your purpose…" The Catalyst began, "Is to fulfill your role. I created the Avatars to guide the Galaxy to its final goal. The Reapers, my solution, I've seen that it's coming to an end, they will no longer be able to fulfill their purpose. I have foreseen this for a few cycles, now." It admitted, "With my solution beginning to fail, I needed a new solution. A new answer. That's where the Avatars were created."

Sower took a step forward, "You started the Avatars previously?" He asked, shocked.

"Yes. It started two cycles ago with the Inusannon, but the Avatars failed almost immediately. They were created too early before the Harvest, and were disregarded by the races of the time." The Catalyst explained, "Then, with the Protheans, I tried once more. They were timed better, but did little to solve the problem. Their legacy, however, was engrained into Prothean society with the inclusion of Avatars of various traits. Ultimately, the Avatars failed."

"So, you've tried here, again?" Jordan asked, shocked at the revelations, "And did they have knowledge of Mass Effect?"

The Catalyst, somehow, displayed a small, smug smile, "Yes and no. I gave them the knowledge of the future, and of the Reapers' plans, but it wasn't Mass Effect as you know it." He looked up and held hard eye-contact with Jordan, "You are aware of the Multiverse Theorem, yes?"

Jordan simply nodded, not liking where this was going.

"Nearly two dozen cycles ago, a spacefaring race had somehow learned of the Cycle of Extinction and the Reaper Invasion every fifty-thousand years, and managed to trick us. They had founded a secret colony in a system near the outer rim, and erased all records of it. Then, as the invasion began, they somehow shut down the relay to the system while imitating the destruction of a Relay, making it seem that the system had been wiped away by the resulting explosion. For the first time in history, a race had survived and tricked me." The Catalyst said with some amount of respect.

Not interrupting, Jordan allowed the AI to continue with its story. "Unfortunately for them, they were then forced to remain within that single system. I do not know the exact date, but sometime before the end of the next cycle, they had been wiped out by a plague. Before dying out, however, they'd successfully tested and proven the multiverse theory by building a device that utilized the system's Mass Relay. I will not bore you with the details, but they had succeeded in sending a spacefaring vessel into another reality."

Jordan was shocked, "What…?" He said, before asking, "Other universes and realities… like mine?"

The Catalyst nodded, but had a small smile on its face, as if it found what he said amusing, "It was during one of the following harvests that one of my 'Reapers' discovered that the relay was, in fact, intact. For the first time since I'd created my solution, I directly intervened in the Harvest. I assumed control of the particular Reaper and cut off its communication with the rest of them. Harbinger believed it to be destroyed… Using it, I learned of the other system, and the race's device." It said, "For three constant cycles, I experimented with it, sending the individual 'Reaper' through to other worlds, exploring. Do you know what I'd found?"

Jordan didn't reply, so the Catalyst continued.

"I'd found realties like this one, with its own Intelligence and its own harvest. I had found universes where my solution never came to fruition. Most importantly, I'd found alternate ones where this future was predicted through their media. I absorbed the information from one and returned the data to the Citadel, and watched the following cycle. All data obtained from the other world matched up perfectly with the cycle without deviation. What this data also told me, however, was that my solution would not work forever. Organics are crafty, and will eventually find a way to 'overcome' my 'obstacle'. What I needed was a way to ensure that their 'solution' would work in my favor."

"So, you created the Avatars to ensure that whatever we do, it's something that you anticipate." Jordan reasoned, "You created the Avatars so that no matter what happens, in the end, you still win."

"Precisely." The Catalyst told him.

"And this is how you knew about me?" Jordan asked, "You found a world where Mass Effect existed and predicted this cycle's end? That's where I came from?!"

"I did, but not without complications." The Catalyst admitted, "The Protheans had locked me into the Citadel at the end of their cycle, forcing me to utilize far more limited resources and information."

Something about what the Catalyst just made Jordan's heart begin to pick up its pace. Stress levels began to rise as fear began to take hold… The Catalyst had been locked away within the Citadel by the Protheans fifty-thousand years ago… so how did it bring him here two years ago?

The Catalyst seemed to sense what Jordan had been thinking, but continued its thoughts, "Even with limited resources, I realized that this would be the best chance to finish what my solution was trying to accomplish, so I went ahead with the Avatar program, and created four Avatars, each with their own purposes. One to stand for the chaotic nature of Organics and the destruction that they will eventually enact on themselves. One to represent Organics' need for control over their surroundings, until their precious control is inevitably lost. One to represent Organics' failure against the inevitable, leading to one final cycle after them." The Catalyst paused before focusing on Jordan, "And one to represent the final, inevitable evolution of all life. Perfect synthesis of organic and synthetic beings. The Pinnacle of Evolution…"

Jordan's legs became unsteady as he took all of this in, his mind hyper-focusing on one single work in the AI's explanation. The word echoed relentlessly in his head before it eventually became too much, and forced its way from his lips, "Created?" He let out in only a whisper.

The Intelligence let out a single humorless laugh, "What? You thought you were transported here?" It asked incredulously. "You thought that green, magic lightning could pull you through a primitive box of electronics and transport you to another universe?" It asked, "It is the most illogical explanation possible, yet you latched onto it as fact? How arogantly pathetic."

Jordan's legs gave out as he fell to his knees, "I'm… I'm not even me?" He asked, bringing both hands up to stare at them.

"You are creations of my own design." It said without remorse, "To get back to your original inquiry about Cynthia Wake, the Avatar of Control, I recreated her. I had the original data in her creation, so after her death, I worked to rebuild her. I needed all four of the Avatars out there… I needed her… just as I needed you…"

"Wh-…what?" Jordan whispered, his head jerking back up to stare at the Catalyst.

"You didn't find it odd that you 'woke up here' a year later than the other three avatars?" It asked, before answering, "Your original died, left for dead by the other Avatars, you didn't even have a chance to work toward Synthesis, so I had to build another one."

Jordan's mind felt like it was crumbling at its seems. He was an artificial construct, created to do something he was wholeheartedly against. He wasn't even unique… He was a clone of an artificial construct, created with false memories… false memories… If you are defined by your memories, what was he when everything he thought he knew was implanted and fake? Tears began to swell in his eyes, but he still needed to know more…

"If… it that's true, that… that you want Synthesis to occur… why are there other avatars?" Jordan asked, "Why did you create me to be against Synthesis if that's my purpose?"

The Catalyst took a moment to gather its response, leaving the chamber in silence for a moment before it replied, "Synthesis is inevitable. If you fail, and another Avatar succeeds, it only delays the inevitable…" Jordan thought of the Crucible. Was it a trap, designed by the Reapers and hidden for someone to find the plans? Will the Crucible actually destroy all Reapers? Would someone be able to control the Reapers without restarting the Harvest eventually? The Catalyst didn't know of these thoughts, and continued, "No matter the immediate outcome, my eventual solution will conclude, it's already set in motion…"

The Avatar of Synthesis could feel an inner war brewing within him, emotional pain and confusion reaching a peak as his unconscious mind began to war with itself. "I… I don't…"

"You wanted to know the truth, Jordan Sower, and the truth is what you will get. It matters not if you accept it, or if you deny it, the end is unaltered." The Catalyst told it, "Allow me to share one last memory with you…"

Images and flashes echoed through Jordan's mind as the new memory took root.


Recorded: January 3rd, 2182. 4:29 am.

Jordan woke up with a groan, cold metal greeting the young man beneath him as he opened his eyes carefully to look at his surroundings. Coughing, unnatural liquid left his lungs as he greedily gulped down gallons of air. Around him, he noticed he was laying in moderate-sized chamber, with several hallways branching off into different directions.

'Mass Effect?' He idly thought, 'I'm really here…'

Looking to his sides, he saw three other humans with him, all attempting to recover from whatever states they were all in. Closest to him on his right was a man, who seemed to work out quite a bit as he was pretty ripped. His hair was pitch black and short, and his eyes were dark brown. So dark, it could almost be mistaken as black. His skin was a dark color, but not overly so.

To his immediate left was a woman. She, like the man he'd seen, had some muscles on her form, and was decently built. She had long, fiery red hair that reached just below her shoulders. Her skin extremely light and pale, and her eyes must have been brown. There was no way she actually had red eyes, right?

Further to his left, on the other side of the first woman was another. She had shorter hair than the first one by a few inches and stopping above her shoulders, and wasn't as muscular as the first two he'd observed. Her hair was a glistening blonde, and her bright blue eyes were darting around the room as well. Her skin was tanned.

The other three were looking among themselves, too, before their attention was grabbed by another, unfortunately, familiar voice. "You're awake. Good."

"The Catalyst…" The red-haired woman said from beside him.

"You remember… excellent." His voice said. Jordan looked up and saw a holographic projector sitting on the ground before them, projecting an image of the human-child-looking AI.

"What…" The guy from his left began, "What the hell happened?"

"The four of you are here to help me with my solution…"

"The fuck?" He questioned. Jordan nodded, too, agreeing with the man.

"The four of you are my Avatars." He said, pointing to them one at a time, "You are my Avatar of Destruction. You will work to stop my Solution from succeeding and show me that my Solution has reached its final conclusion." He pointed to the other woman, "You are my Avatar of Control, your mission is to eventually take my place and oversee my Solution." Now it pointed at himself, "You are my Avatar of Synthesis. You will fix this galaxy and unite synthetic and organic life." At a loss for words at the solid declaration, he watched the AI point at the final person, "And you are my Avatar of Oblivion. If and when the others work, you will ensure my Solution reaches its final conclusion during the next cycle."

The 'Avatar of Oblivion' stood shakily to his feet and stared at the AI with hatred, "Fuck you." He spat, "I… we're not your puppets. I will never help the Reapers."

The woman beside him climbed to her feet as well, "I will ensure the Reapers' destruction. I don't care if you told me it's my job or not, they will be destroyed." She promised the AI.

The blonde woman jumped to her feet and extended her arm to point into the other woman's chest, a snarl on her face, "Screw that, the Reapers can't be simply destroyed. It'd be a waste; the Galaxy would just slip into another war." She told her, "If the Reapers are controlled, not all AI will die, like EDI, and I can ensure peace."

"You?!" The former woman asked in shock, "What gives you the right to choose what we do?"

"Oh, and you aren't?!" She shot back.

"Guys, err, gals, stop it!" The guy said, "Why are you listening to the Catalyst?!"

Jordan finally stood up, staring hatefully at the other guy, "And why should they or any of us listen to you? You're supposed to basically let the Reapers win, right?"

"I-I beg your pardon?" He asked, "I'm not listening to this stupid hunk of junk. The Catalyst doesn't control us, and he certainly doesn't control me."

Jordan shook his head at him, "Of course you'd say that, trying to save your own skin." He then thought back to Synthesis. Aside from Shepard dying, it was by far the best and happiest ending in the game. "If Synthesis is finally reached, all life in the galaxy will be at peace. The harvests will be over, and everyone and everything will be perfect."

At his bold statement, he felt a hand on his shoulder, which whipped him around to come face-to-face with the fiery-haired woman, "Excuse me? I couldn't help but hear the utter horseshit you were spewing. Perfect? Peace? As if!" She scoffed, "The Reapers are far too dangerous to let live. Sure, EDI's and the Geth's deaths would be tragic, but it's for the good of the galaxy. Besides, they're just machines, no matter how attached we become to them. They can always be rebuilt…"

Jordan felt rage overcome him and he swung a fist at the fiery woman before him. She tried to dodge the strike, so it only grazed her face. She snarled in absolute rage and tackled him. As he fell, he saw both of the other two 'Avatars' rush in opposing directions, running into different tunnels and hallways. To the side, where the Catalyst was watching, he could make out a small, satisfied smile on the otherwise emotionless face.

A blow to the side of his head brought his attention back to the Avatar of Destruction, his vision blurring at the strike. "You fucker! You have any idea who you're messing with?" She questioned him, striking him repeatedly.

Ignoring her stupid question, he managed to block a hit or two and land one on her stomach. Using the moment to his advantage, Jordan pushed her off of him and looked around the obvious Keeper tunnel he was in, spotting some scrap metal scattered around the room in various locations. He dove to the side and grabbed a jagged piece of metal.

Turning around quickly, he saw the woman approaching. Using the sharp piece of metal, he lunged at her. Unfortunately, her reflexes and previous experience were better than he'd known, and she blocked the strike with one hand. Her eyes were glowing a deadly red and she ripped the metal from his hand, forcing it to the floor as she jabbed him with a fist in his side, before kicking him in the balls.

Falling to the ground, he grabbed the makeshift weapon and swiped at her, leaving a nasty cut on her calf. She screamed in pain and anger as she stomped on his arm, flooding his system with further pain.

Pushing him fully onto his back, Jordan was stunned as the air was knocked out of him, only to have the woman straddle him. She swung repeated punches into his head as he fought to remain awake and conscious. His arms were almost fully pinned to the ground, and his strength was weakening. In desperation, he reached over and grabbed the blood-coated weapon for a third time. He swung it as hard as he could into the woman's side.

She reacted in an instant, though. She intercepted the swing and redirected it with the additional force of her own power into Jordan's thigh, causing him to scream out in pain. He knew, right then and there, that he was fucked. She punched him one final time in the head, the pain numbing his entire body as his grip and willpower vanished.

She slowly and carefully rose from him, looking at Jordan with a mixture of apprehension and hatred, before her eyes darted to where the metal laid in Jordan's leg. She saw the wound that was inflicted, and knew how serious it was. Despite feeling bad, however much she was, she knew he was trying to kill her, too. She hardened her eyes and reached down to grab the jagged piece of steel that had sliced through Jordan's artery.

She looked him in the eyes and spoke slowly and neutrally, "I'm sure the Catalyst will take care of you, seeing as you're the one he's obviously banking on…" She paused for a moment, shifting the piece of metal slightly and causing Jordan to groan in pain, "That being said, if I ever see you again, and you're trying to stop Shepard from choosing Destruction… let's just say I'll be far less merciful." With that, she pulled the metal out of his leg, allowing the wound to overflow.

She walked away without looking back, disappearing down one of the Keeper tunnels with a slight limp.

Jordan could feel darkness eating away at his mind as he actively fought to stay awake. He turned toward the Catalyst, hoping he'd do something or get the Keepers to help him. He didn't want to die, he wanted to mean something. To save people. To go home…

The Catalyst looked upon Jordan's broken and dying form with disappointment. It spoke aloud, "Overly committed and violent. Perhaps his personality needs to be freer and truer to itself. I'll just have to make sure my Avatar does better next time. More data will be needed…"

Jordan felt tears fall from his eyes.

He didn't want to die. He was afraid, alone in a dark chamber in another galaxy, far away from anyone who cared about him.

He didn't want to die.

He didn't want to die.

He didn't… want to die…

He… He didn't… He didn't…

He didn't… want… to… to…


As the new memory took root and cemented itself into Jordan's mind, he could no longer take it. The emotional damage had grown, his mind was at war with itself, and all hope within him vanished like water down a drain. Physically and mentally feeling himself die for a second time, even as just a memory, further ruined his already dubious state of being. It was far too much for him. His mind closed itself off as he slumped to the ground, finally unconscious, with tears streaming down his pale cheeks. A nosebleed began from his left nostril from the damage done by the memory imprinting itself within his brain. Talk about an existential crisis...

The two Keepers grabbed the Catalyst's display as it dimmed away into the darkness, before leaving the chamber and unlocking the doorway at the end of the hall Jordan had come from. The Catalyst's final expression before vanishing was one of smug victory, despite the occurrences of the day.

With the door now unlocked, Shepard and Tela, who'd only gotten a vague play-by-play by those in the Normandy as they tried to break through the door, finally rushed through the doorway and down the hall, quickly reaching the unconscious man. In a panic, Shepard called the Normandy again and Tela gently picked Jordan up bridal style, easily noticing the blood on his face.

"Shepard to Normandy, prep the med bay! We've got wounded!" He called out, noticing Jordan's state as well.

As the two of them quickly rushed out of the Keeper Tunnels, both Spectre's minds began to race at the implications of what they'd just witnessed. They were shocked, angry, confused, and most of all, they felt pity towards the man they carried out. They didn't know that more shock and truths were soon to come, once Jordan woke up.

That is, IF he does wake up…


A/N:

Over 300k words, nearly 400 reviews, almost 800 follows, and more than 600 favorites… You guys are the best, and I'm so thrilled that so many of you are enjoying this story! Thanks, all of you, for your support!

Now… Finally got my Loyalty mission out there for you, and I hope you enjoyed it and were shocked by the twists and truth behind the Avatars and Jordan. Not a ton of action, but that's ok… More information will be revealed over the course of the story, though not all at once. Other questions you may have will likely be answered eventually. Such questions like:

"How exactly does this 'Interdimensional device' work and where is it?" "What are the other parts of the Catalyst's plans?" "What are the Catalyst's plans regarding the Crucible?" "Will the Catalyst interfere directly with the cycle in other ways?" "Is there something wrong with the Catalyst, some of what he says/does, doesn't make a ton of sense, especially for his plans to eventually succeed?" And maybe more…

I will, however, answer the last one real quick, which is something Jordan's realizing and will be touched on later… I think of it as Rampancy, which is displayed in Halo. In the Halo series, AI eventually go crazy and begin to break down due to data overflow and other issues. I'd imagine a billion-year-old AI, that works and live in isolation, to eventually break down and go crazy. It likely maintains itself to prevent a total breakdown, somehow, but still… I imagine by this point, small flaws are forming in its code, and some proto-emotions are beginning to form. I see the Catalyst as a pure-evil artificial intelligence that is becoming more and more desperate to complete its supposed purpose, and is slowly breaking down and making mistakes… some of which it may not even realize it is doing…

Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter. More is coming soon, and next chapter will be the 50th one! (according to FF, if you include the prologue and Current Events) Feel free to review, favorite, or follow.

I enjoy reading your reviews and messges, and hearing what you guys think. Also, like above, let me know about the discord idea...

Until next time!

-swrWriter