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Chapter 49

The moment Virgil stepped into the guest bedroom and the door closed behind him, he released a deep, shaky breath. He made his way over to the nearest chair and collapsed into it; his legs barely able to hold his weight anymore as they felt like jelly. As much as he didn't want to leave Avery on her own right now, a part of him felt glad when she asked to be alone. Reading the letter out for her had been harder for him than he had expected it to be.

He was grateful that he had been given a space where he could be alone, he needed the space to compose himself and sort out how he was feeling…about everything. Although Avery had told them that her family was different compared to his, he hadn't expected the differences to be so obvious. He was having trouble trying to accept that what was going on here was real and not some crazy dream; but he knew this was definitely not a dream…or would that be a nightmare?

Despite Avery being his main reason for being there, he was certainly starting to regret coming here and meeting this version of his family. When he had first thought of coming here, a part of him had wondered if he would be able to make a difference for this family, especially the way that Jeff treated his remaining sons. But now after speaking to the Tracy patriarch, he was beginning to realise that there wasn't anything he'd be able to do to make any difference; at least not in the short amount of time he was going to be there. That thought pained him as he couldn't even begin to imagine what it would be like to be so alienated from his own brothers. They all played such an important part in his life as well as in who he was. He felt sad that this Virgil hadn't experienced the joy of having that kind of relationship with his own.

There was suddenly an angry pounding on the door to the room opened which abruptly pulled Virgil from his thoughts. Before he had a chance to get to his feet and open the door to find out who was outside, Scott barged into the room.

"Why are you here?" he demanded as he came to stand in front of a still seated Virgil. Feeling intimidated by the height difference, Virgil tried to stand, but Scott forced him back down. "Why did you come here?"

"Excuse me," Virgil replied as he shrugged Scott's hand from off his shoulder and got to his feet, coming as nose to nose with this Scott as he could considering that Scott had a few inches on him; just like his own brother did.

"Why are you here…what do you want from us?" he asked again, his voice sounding pained.

"I wanted to make sure that it was safe for Avery to come home," Virgil replied calmly, although inside he felt anything but. "Look," he continued as he looked Scott square it the face, "I swear I didn't come here to cause any trouble, okay."

"Well you should have thought of that before you got here and upset everything, shouldn't you," Scott spat back.

"I'm sorry, Avery's safety was my only concern, I didn't think…"

"That's always been your issue hasn't it…you never think," Scott replied angrily.

"Hey," Virgil held his arms up defensively, "I'm not who you think I am…so don't judge me okay. You don't know me."

"Of course I do, I know exactly what you're like," Scott snored derisively. "You think because you look and sound just like my brother that you can come here and do this to us…to her."

"Do what, I haven't done anything. When Avery ended up in my reality, she lost consciousness and crashed her plane into the ocean. I had to make sure that didn't happen again…I couldn't let her put herself and her baby at risk. Not if I could prevent it."

"You're in love with her aren't you?"

"Excuse me," Virgil couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Oh come on, I saw the way you look at her, and now you're talking about protecting her…admit it you have feelings for her." Scott demanded.

"So what if I do?"

"She isn't yours to protect," Scott snarled in response. That was when Virgil saw it.

"I'm not the only one either am I?"

"What!"

"You're in love with her too, aren't you?" The way that Scott's jaw dropped open told Virgil that he was right.

"You know nothing about me either," Scott spat, frustrated.

"I know what Avery has told me. I know she was trying to fix things between you and Virgil, so that you could mend your relationship."

Defeated, Scott gave a nod just as the tears began to fall.

"She was wasting her time. Things were never going to change between us. No matter how much I wanted it to…he'd have never allowed it to."

"How can you be so sure of that?" Virgil asked curiously. This wasn't something that Avery had mentioned, she had seemed convinced that she could have helped bring the brothers together. So clearly Scott knew something that Avery wasn't aware of.

"Before he died, Virgil wrote us all letters…did Avery tell you that?"

Virgil nodded, he was definitely aware of the letters.

"I know Avery couldn't bring herself to open her letter, but I decided to read mine a couple of days after Virgil died. So yeah, that's how I know."

"I don't understand?" Virgil asked confused. It was clear in Scott's tone that he was angry and bitter about how things had been between the two of them.

"I had opened the letter hoping that he might have said something about regretting the way things were between us," he began to explain. But Virgil could see from the other mans expression that unlike Avery, his expectations about what was in his letter had been completely destroyed.

"Instead his letter to me consisted of just four words," he concluded.

Virgil was still confused; he couldn't understand how a four word letter would tell Scott that things between them were irreparable; even if they had been given the chance. Virgil knew that he and Scott had experienced times where their relationship was going through its problems, especially recently. But he also knew that they would eventually work through their issues and fix whatever was damaged. He couldn't even begin to imagine a situation where this would never be the case. Even if things had turned out differently and Avery had decided to have stayed in his reality so they could have been together, he knew that Scott would never have allowed his feelings for her destroy their relationship anymore than he would...and that was when the penny dropped.

"He knew how you felt about Avery, didn't he?"

Scott gave a small nod of his head. "'Stay away from Avery', that was what was written in his letter to me. When I read it I knew what he meant and that he had figured out how I felt about her."

Virgil couldn't believe what he was hearing, his mouth almost dropping open in surprise. "I'm so sorry Scott," Virgil said and Scott saw that he really meant what he was saying. "I can't believe that he would say something like that. I know that if it was me and she was my wife, I'd rather she was cared for by someone who I trusted and cared about."

"You really aren't my brother, are you?" Scott scoffed. "We weren't close, hadn't been since we were kids. We hardly knew each other. I wish I could say that wasn't the case but then I'd be lying," he added with a sigh, "I wasn't close to him like you are to your brothers." Scott's voice was thick with emotion as he spoke, and Virgil could tell that although he wasn't close with his brother – he had wanted to be. He could also tell that despite everything, Scott missed his brother.

"Wait, how do you know I'm close with my brothers?" he asked surprised as he suddenly registered what Scott had just said.

Scott shrugged "I can tell by the way you talk about them," he replied, "Plus you wouldn't have said you'd rather your wife end up with your brother if you didn't have that kind of relationship. Plus I saw the concern on your face for Gordon earlier too."

"What about you. I mean, Virgil wasn't your only brother?"

"After our mum died, it was as if our father gave up on us, so it fell on me to look after them."

"Something similar happened to us," Virgil admitted. Scott's reaction told Virgil that he was surprised to hear this.

"Virgil was a lot like our mum, so Dad focused his attention on him. He became his 'favourite'..."

Virgil shook his head in disgust "A parent shouldn't have favourites," he muttered under his breath – if Scott heard him he didn't react.

"…it was as if the rest of us didn't matter. That he'd forgotten that we were a part of her too. Alan looks the most like her and Gordon has her playfulness…or he did."

Virgil gave a nod of understanding. He had heard similar remarks from this own father recently about the ways in which each of them were like their mother. It had taken a while for Virgil and his brothers to repair their relationship with their father after their mum passed away – but they had managed it and although they didn't always see eye to eye, he could never see his father favouring one of them over the others. The thought of what this Jeff had done disgusted him.

"I basically became like a father to John, Gordon and Alan," Scott continued, "I took on the responsibility of looking after them because Dad was only really interested in Virgil."

"So you resented him for it?"

"I resented both of them for it," Scott corrected. "With Dad focusing his attention on Virgil he had barely anything to do with the rest of us," Scott let out a shaky breath before continuing, "his neglect had a profound effect on all of us…I did what I could but I was still a teenager and I needed help too. But Gordon was the one who it affected the most. He acted out and dad didn't know how to deal with him…"

"So he sent him away?"

"Eventually, he had no idea how to handle Gordon's issues so he decided not to even try. To begin with Gordon didn't want to go, but it actually turned out to be the best thing for him...he found something he excelled at and a place where he fit in…until the accident. After that things got worse than they had been before."

"The accident," Virgil asked "as in the Hydrofoil?"

"I remember seeing the accident on TV," Scott replied. "I felt so conflicted. I was sad for the crew because they all died, but I was also relieved as well that Gordon wasn't a part of the team."

"I know that your brother wasn't part of the crew."

"But he was supposed to be. They had to replace him at the last minute because he was ill…food poisoning or something. He struggled with the guilt for a long time…I still don't think he's fully recovered from it," Scott explained.

"I can imagine. My Gordon struggled a lot with guilt too. Besides his recovery, he struggled to deal with the fact that he was the only survivor."

Scott stood there dumbfounded; his mouth had dropped open from shock. "Your brother was actually part of the team?"

Virgil gave a nod. "It was touch and go for a while if he was actually going to make it…then they weren't sure if he'd ever walk again…"

"Did he?"

"He did…" Virgil told him, a proud grin on his face. "…not only did he make a full recovery, he went on to win a gold medal in swimming at the Olympics plus he's an invaluable member of International Rescue..."

"That must have been tough."

"It was, but we helped him get through it and it brought us all closer together as a family. He still has issues from time to time – especially after tough rescues, but we have ways of helping him."

"He's lucky to have that. Although Gordon wasn't part of the team, he struggled with guilt after the accident had occurred. We tried to help him as best we could, but it wasn't easy…and by 'we' I mean me and John. Dad wasn't really any help. He just seemed to treat Gordon like he was doing it for attention...which definitely wasn't the case…although he did seem to be making progress, then Virgil died and he withdrew into himself even more than before. Then again I don't think Dad's idea to shut down International Rescue helped any of us…"

"He shut you down...why? Was he worried he might lose someone else?" Virgil asked, hopeful that he may have misjudged this Jeff after all.

"No nothing like that…otherwise Alan's accident would have made him consider ending operations and it didn't. I think after Virgil's death he just lost all interest in maintaining the organisation. Yet for us, it gave us something to focus on…a purpose, you know?"

Virgil gave a nod; he definitely felt like he understood what Scott was saying. "I can't even begin to imagine how difficult things have been for you. Forming International Rescue gave my Dad something to focus on after our mum died…it gave us something to work towards together. I don't know how any of us would be able to deal with losing that. My brother Scott helped us a lot after we lost our mum because our dad struggled to come to terms with it. We stopped being the main focus of his attention for a time, but eventually he knew we needed to work through it together. At first Scott had trouble re-adjusting as he had gotten used to being responsible for us; it's a habit he was never really able to break but that's what makes him such a great big brother." Virgil explained with a smile. As he spoke he could see the anger return to the other mans eyes, along with something else…jealousy. Virgil knew that he needed to get this Scott to open up about how he was really feeling, especially about losing his brother. Virgil called it his brotherly intuition but he knew that despite everything Scott was still grieving his brother's death, but the anger and resentment he had towards him was stopping him from moving forward.

"You need to find a way to let go of the anger you're holding on to Scott," Virgil said, his voice soft. When Scott didn't respond straight away, Virgil thought he had said the wrong thing. No matter how much this Scott looked like his brother…he definitely wasn't the same as his brother and he was beginning to think that he had pushed too hard.

"I don't know how," Scott answered finally, "Maybe if he was still here it would be easier…I could have it out with him…but he's not," he added with a shrug.

"True. But I'm here…maybe you could use me as a stand in. Get whatever it is that is weighing you down off your chest," Virgil offered with his arms out wide in a welcoming gesture. "And if hitting me will make you feel better – then go for it."

"I'm not going to fight you," Scott argued.

"Scott…"

"No. Look I appreciate the gesture, I really do. But what happened between the two of us had nothing to do with you," Scott let out a deep breath and it was as if his whole body had deflated. He was clearly exhausted. "I'm just so tired of feeling like this," he added as he dropped down onto the bed. Virgil almost expected him to lie back but he didn't, he remained seated, but his shoulders and head were slumped forward.

"It's not fait that you've had to carry this burden, not just for yourself but for your brothers too."

"I'm the oldest…"

This comment brought out a small chuckle from Virgil. "You're more like my brother than I first thought you would be," he told him. Virgil took a seat next to him on the bed; their shoulders touching. Virgil had half expected Scott to move away from him, but he was convinced he felt Scott lean into him instead.

Although his main reason for being there was to make sure that Avery had made it home safely, he was now beginning to hope that maybe he could help some of the residents of this Tracy Island find some sort of closure.