[The camera pans through a sewer.]

Eddy: "Gruesome, tasteless, hideous and repulsive! Pure genius!"

Edd: [in protective gear] "How you ever talked me into this is beyond me. We're in a sewer, Eddy! An incubator for every parasite known to humans!"

Eddy: "It writes itself, Double D! We're gonna be rich! Filthy rich, I tell ya."

Nat: "Why would anyone want to be down here?"

Eddy: "It's GOING to work."

[Nat sighs]

[A trail of bubble is seen in front of the boat. Something rises from the muck.]

Edd and Nat: "Look out behind you!"

Eddy: "That's the oldest trick in the book, Sheesh, get real." [The tentacle behind him gloms on to his head and picks him up.] "Aah! Let me go! Let me go!"

Edd: "Don't fight it, Eddy! Try to–" [A wave sprays all over him.]

Eddy: "Ed, stop! Save it for the customers!"

Ed: "I am an Edapuss, 'cause I'm Ed."

Eddy: "You're gonna be Ed-a-dead after I get–"

Nazz: "Swamp Ride?"

Sarah: "Oh, brother!"

Eddy: "Customers."

[In the lane, Sarah, Nazz, and Jimmy are walking.]

Sarah: "Who wants to ride a swamp?"

Nazz: "I think I'll pass."

Jimmy: "Why can't the Eds think of something nice to ride, like a dolphin?" [He falls through the open manhole.]

Nazz: "Boys will be boys." [She and Sarah walk on, oblivious to Jimmy's predicament.]

Jimmy: [landing in sludge] "Sarah?" [He turns around to face the masked Edd.] "Gym teacher!" [He faints.]

Ed: "I am Edapuss, because I am a–"

Eddy: [pushing Ed away] "Hang on, he hasn't paid yet. Numskull." [to Jimmy] "Welcome to Ed and Nat's Swamp Ride. That'll be twenty-five cents."

Jimmy: "Sarah!"

Sarah: [returning to the manhole] "Jimmy! What happened?"

Jimmy: "I fell on my tushy, Sarah!"

Sarah: "Don't move! I'll save you!"

[Sarah pulls out a modified fishing pole and casts it in. She catches Jimmy and hauls him out.]

Sarah: "Pee-yew, Jimmy, you stink!"

Nazz: [covering her nostrils] "That's putting it mildly."

Eddy: [from the sewer] "Hey! Why don't you let the guy have some fun, huh?"

Sarah: "You're in a sewer, idiot. It's dirty, and stinky–"

Eddy: "It's called ambiance! It's a swamp ride, get it? What do you girls know about–" [A sign is thrown down at him.] "No skin off my nose, Sarah. I'm sure Kevin, Rolf, even Jonny will–"

Sarah: "They went go-karting!"

Eddy: [popping out of the hole] "Go-karting?"

Sarah: "And they won't be back till supper. Bye bye!" [She throws the manhole cover back on the manhole. As a result, Eddy is hit by the cover and plummets back down into the sludge.]

Ed: "I think Sarah likes you, Eddy."

Eddy: "Great. We're stuck here with two girls and a Jimmy. This calls for a change of plans, Double D and Nat. We need to find our more sensitive side." [He tickles Edd and Nat.]

Ed: "I found my sensitive side, 'cause it has a rash."

Eddy: "Oh!"

[Nat makes a disgusted face.]

Edd: [disgusted] "Thank you for sharing that with us, Ed."

Eddy: "Now, what do girls like?"

Nat: "Well girls like-"

Ed: "Sarah likes to watch me eat yogurt from my belly button. Heh heh heh!"

[Eddy, Nat and Edd give him disgusted looks]

Edd: [after a long pause] "Ahem. Before Ed fills my head with any more disturbing images, I suggest a study. An observation of girls in their habitats."

Nat: "Ok sure."

Eddy: "Study? I follow my guts, Double D."

Ed: "I smell waffles, guys and girl."

Eddy: "Shut up, Ed." [He pulls Ed out of the sewer.]

Jimmy: [at the top of a slide] "Won't I stick to it and chafe my thighs again, Sarah?"

Sarah: "Don't be silly, silly! On your mark, get set,"

Jimmy: [sliding down] "Whee!"

[Nat approaches them slightly nervous.]

Sarah: "Hey Nat! Want to play with us?"

Nat: "Sure I'd love to."

Sarah: "Last one to the swings is an Ed!"

[They run to the swing-set, laughing. Edd, who has hidden himself behind the slide, makes some notes.]

Nazz: "Check this out, Sarah and Nat!" [She jumps on a rope swing and does a gymnastic stunt, landing in a pile of leaves.] "Awesome!"

Nat: "Wow!"

Sarah: [jumping into the pile from the other direction] "Whee! Gee, Nazz, that was rad! Did it hurt?"

Nazz: "Not when you land softly, Sarah!"

Nat: "Hey girls watch this!" [She swings high into the air and jumps off, doing a front flip as she lands on her feet.]

Nazz: "Awesome!"

Sarah: "That was incredible!"

Nat: "Thanks girls that's really sweet!"

[Edd stares in astonishment.]

Sarah: "Can I try?"

Nazz: "Uh, sorta dangerous. Start slow. Try the spinning wheel."

Sarah: "Okay, girlfriend!"

[After they leave, Ed and Eddy stick their heads out of the leaf pile.]

Eddy: "Soft? She practically broke my back!"

[Sarah starts on the merry-go round. Eddy watches from a hollow tree. Suddenly, the wheel lifts up to reveal Ed is working as the axle.]

Eddy: "Oh, oh! Discovery! Discovery!"

Edd: [from a bush beside Eddy] "What is it?"

[They both look at Ed.]

Eddy: "Don't you just want to pinch his cheeks?"

Edd: [signaling] "Get down, get down!"

[Ed heeds Edd's signals and dives. The merry-go-round, no longer supported by anything, falls into the dirt and grinds down a few feet. Sarah, still holding on, is shoved into the dirt by it.]

Sarah: [dazed and confused] "Jimmy?"

Jimmy: "Jumping jackrabbits, look at those stubborn grass stains!" [Edd makes some notes.] "Better use some club soda on those clothes. It's the only way to get them clean. Hurry and meet me in the daisies, Sarah!"

[Jimmy is running through a field of flowers, where the Eds are disguised as flowers.]

Jimmy: "Whee! The fragrance of flowers is so sweet!" [spotting some new flowers] "Hello, you new in town? May I smell you? Why thank you."

[Jimmy grabs the three new flowers. These flowers are really Eddy's hair. The scent of Eddy makes Jimmy start to gag.]

Jimmy: "Yuck! You smell like cheap shampoo! I'm tearing!" [He runs away.]

[Nat approaches the Eds.]

Nat: "What did you get?"

Edd: "Gentlemen, and I use that term lightly, and lady, I think I've compiled enough data for us to proceed. According to my observations, girls are prone to 1: soft, as in Nazz; 2: sweet, describing Nat; 3: clean, reference Sarah, and 4: fresh fragrance, a la Jimmy."

Eddy: "That's stupid! We're right back where we started–" [an idea hits] "Bingo!" [The lightbulb goes out and Eddy flicks it on again.] "It's the pants!"

[Nat makes a confused face]

Edd: [surprised] "Pants, Eddy?"

Eddy: "Chicks dig pants! Nazz wears pants, Sarah wears pants, Nat wears pants–"

Edd: "You wear pants!"

Eddy: [proudly] "I wear pants."

[Edd and Nat giggle, and Eddy realizes that by his reasoning he is a girl.]

Edd: "Pay attention, Eddy! Soft, sweet, clean, and fresh it is!" [He walks off.]

Nat: "Right behind you!"

Eddy: [following] "I hate it when he does that."

Ed: "Quack."

[Eddy looks out of a bush in the lane. Nazz rides a bike past, and Sarah and Jimmy follow.]

Sarah: "Hurry, Jimmy!"

Jimmy: "When are we going to push back our cuticles, Sarah?"

Eddy: [leaping out of the bush] "Hey! Hold up! For the first time, specially designed for you tender types, and priced to delight, our Snuggle-Me-Ed!" [He pulls a fuzz-covered Ed from the bush.] "He's soft, sweet, clean, and fresh."

Sarah: "So what?"

Nazz: "Is that dryer lint all over him?"

Eddy: "Nat, wouldn't you pay twenty-five cents to hug the neck?"

Ed: [scared] "Bug?! GET IT OFF GET IT OFF! AAAAAAHHH!"

[Ed runs through part of the fence. This part was holding up another, longer part, which collapses on Edd, Nat, Eddy, Sarah, Jimmy, and Nazz.]

Jimmy: "Oh no." [the fence falls] "Ow."

Eddy: "Don't think she went for it."

[Sarah lifts up a board and climbs out.]

Sarah: "ED, YOU'RE GONNA GET IT! I'M TELLING ON–" [she fondles her earlobe] "Oh no. My earring! I lost my earring!"

Nat: "Oh no."

Edd: "I feel so guilty."

Sarah: [crying] "I loved my earring!"

Jimmy: [climbing out] "Sarah, look, I'm trendy!" [Jimmy has a nose ring.] "Fashion can be so painful."

Sarah: "My earring! Gimme it!" [She rips the earring from Jimmy's nose.] "Thank you Jimmy! Thank you thank you thank you!"

Eddy: [having an epiphany] "Did you see that? All those emotions over stupid jewelry? Double D! It's a gold mine!"

[Sarah is playing tennis. Eddy pushes Ed, Nat and Edd out from behind a tree. Ed, Nat and Edd have with them a serving cart.]

Eddy: "Go on!"

Edd: [scared] "Retreat."

Eddy: [pushing them out again] "What's the big deal? They're just girls."

Nat: "But I'm a girl."

[The ball hits Eddy in the mouth.]

Sarah: "Hey hey hey! Get lost!" [to a prone Eddy] "No guys allowed!"

Nat: "But Jimmy is a guy."

Eddy: "If you weren't Ed's sister, I'd–!" [Edd clamps a hand over Eddy's mouth.]

Edd: "What Eddy's trying to say is, we're having a jewelry sale and–"

Sarah: "Jewelry?"

Nazz: "A sale!"

Jimmy: "Baubles and bangles!"

Ed: [wheeling the cart forward] "Imported by an armored truck from the house of European wieners."

Eddy: "Behold!"

Ed: "Behold."

[Ed rips the cloth cover off. The girls besides Nat and Jimmy's faces are lit by the glimmering jewelry.]

Nazz: "Look at all that gold!" [The jewelry is golden kitchen utensils.]

Sarah: "They're so shiny!"

Jimmy: "Lemme see, lemme see!"

Nat: "See anything you like?"

Nazz: "I'm looking for something a little different, only still the same so it matches, without it being too similar."

Eddy: "We'll just check our vault. Officer Ed!" [He shoves Ed through the fence.]

Ed: "A spatula!" [He dips it in a can of gold paint.] "Jewelry for Nazz."

Jimmy: [hunting through the jewelry, pulling out a slinky] "This looks interesting."

Edd: "Yes, well, you obviously have an eye for, ahem, creativity."

Nazz: [receiving the spatula] "Thanks, Ed."

Ed: "She went for it, Eddy."

Jimmy: [now dissatisfied] "That's gaudy."

Eddy: [grabbing it] "Gaudy, nothing. You must have suffered a brain lag, as this is one of our more popular–" [unsure what to say] "–neck-doohickey things."

Sarah: "Can I try it on?"

Eddy: "Why, certainly, miss. Allow me." [He pulls out a mirror.]

[Sarah puts on the jewelry, and it makes her neck stretch out like a giraffe. She ends up with her neck bent double and stretching ten feet into the air.]

Sarah: "How do I look?"

Eddy: "Like a million bucks. Will that be cash, or cash?"

Sarah: "I don't like it!"

Edd: "They hate our merchandise, Eddy!"

Ed: "Give 'em what they want! Can openers." [running to paint the opener] "My mom loves can openers." [He looks back at his friends, confused.] "Are moms girls?"

Eddy: "Not sure."

Edd: "Well, technically..."

Eddy: "Beats me."

Nat: "Yes they are."

Ed: [putting the opener in the paint] "Boy, that's pretty."

[The can opener digs through the bottom of the can, and the contents empty out all over Ed's pants.]

Ed: "Huh? Oops."

Eddy: [talking business] "This ain't a library. Buy or get lost."

Ed: [calling] "Eddy!"

Eddy: "Pardon us for a moment." [He drags Edd and Nat to Ed.]

Ed: [in the lane with them] "Guys, I spilled paint all over my good pants." [He does indeed have gold pants on.]

Eddy: "Oh great. We're hooped."

Nazz: [spotting the pants] "Awesome pants!"

Jimmy: "Are they for sale?"

Eddy: "Uh..."

Jimmy: "I must have them!"

Sarah: "Gimme 'em, they're mine!"

Nazz: "I saw them first!"

[Eddy watches in greed and Edd and Nat watch in horror.]

Eddy: "Get ready to retire, Double D and Nat." [grabbing the pants] "Cashier's this way, ladies!"

[Sarah, Jimmy, and Nazz follow him.]

Sarah: "Hey!"

Nazz: "Aw, come on, Eddy."

Jimmy: "Do you have a layaway plan?"

Eddy: "Feast your eyes on these golden pantaloons! Any offers?"

Nazz: [seductively] "Eddy, it would be so sweet to get those as a gift."

Eddy: [incoherent] "Well uh you knuh i mag a play egg yeah nis madnam."

Edd: "Try syllables in sentences, Eddy."

Sarah: [going after Edd] "Double D? You can get me those pants, can'tcha?" [She backs him up to Eddy.]

Edd: "Nat help!"

Nazz: "Eddy?"

Sarah: "Double D?"

[Nat gets in between the girls and guys.]

Nat: "C'mon girls give them some space."

Jimmy: "Five dollars!" [Sarah and Nazz jump back, surprised.] "For the golden pants."

Eddy: [greed overtaking his lust] "Sold!"

Edd: "Phew!"

Jimmy: [giddy] "Pinch me I'm dreaming! Whee!" [in the pants] "I feel just like Elvis Presley. Jealous?" [The paint develops cracks.] "Oh no! When will the torment end?"

[Jimmy falls, and the paint on the pants shatters into tiny pieces. Jimmy is wearing Ed's pants.]

Nazz: "That wasn't gold, fakers!"

Sarah: "You gypped us!"

Edd: "Exposed."

Nat: "Revealed."

Eddy: "Busted."

Ed: "Nope. Can't think of a word."

[Nazz snatches the $5 bill from Eddy.]

Jimmy: [a bag over his head] "The shame!"

Nazz: "Here's your money, Jimmy." [Jimmy removes the bag. To the Eds] "Grow up."

Sarah: "Wait till you get home, Ed."

Jimmy: "Charlatans."

[The Eds and Nat are left alone in the lane.]

Ed: "Spending an extended time in female company can be mentally disorientating and physically confusing."

Nat: "Oh really?"

Eddy: "What's up with you?"

Edd: "Ed's trouserless state seems to have jarred an intellectual moment within the confines of his brain."

Eddy: "Ed? Is that you?"

Ed: [back to normal] "Hug me!"

Eddy: "Well that didn't last long."

Ed: "Hug!" [He squeezes Eddy.]

Eddy: "Ed!" [He wriggles out of Ed's grip and climbs over the fence.]

Ed: [holding his arms wide] "Double D my pal!"

Edd: "Please, Ed? Ed, no wait! Eddy!"

[Edd climbs the fence as well.]

Ed: "Nat my friend!"

Nat: "No thank you Ed."

[Nat also climbs the fence. Ed runs right through it and hugs his friends.]

Ed: "Hug, guys!"

Edd: "Ed you're in your underwear!"

Ed: "Okay I feel loved now."