Author's note: not sure how to tag this but... referenced period homophobia? Fear of period homophobia? It's only briefly mentioned, and nothing direct only Remus being worried about something.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Remus stayed angry throughout both of his afternoon classes, getting even more furious when Magpie asked him between the two if it was true he and Lily snogged, which was what Nettle had told her. She seemed rather relieved when he snarled that it was a stupid rumor. He grew so angry about the snogging thing that the wolf threatened to take over; he rushed into the bathroom, taking in deep gulps of air, trying to focus until that cooling snap inside of him. Blood dripped down his lips which he quickly cleaned up. He felt a little better, but not much.
After Transfiguration, he asked Lily if she knew about the rumors and she answered yes, she was aware people were saying it. Inkwood tried to apologize, however Lily wasn't having any of it. The two weren't on speaking terms at the moment.
"She told Spinnet!" he said, knowing how pouty he sounded. "I mean, telling Sirius is one thing but Spinnet?"
"I know," Lily sighed. "I'm really sorry, it's my fault. I wasn't thinking."
"S'not your fault..."
Remus disappeared into his dorm after that, wanting to avoid people. He stewed in bed, angrily reading without absorbing the words until James came into the dorm room.
"Not in the mood," Remus said, not even looking up.
"You will when I tell you my idea," James said, locking the door.
Remus glanced up, brow furrowed. "What idea?"
James ran over, jumping into Remus's bed, one of his knees accidentally slamming into Remus's thigh. "Oops," he laughed, settling into the bed next to him, half against him. "I have a brilliant idea. I want to prank Sirius for what said. Nothing big. But. I was thinking... I think you probably want a little revenge against Inkwood." James snuggled up close, giggles breaking through his attempts to talk.
Remus finally lowered his book. "I'm listening."
"Prank them on their date. With this." He pulled a vial out of his pocket, wriggling it in Remus's face. "Bubble Belches. Was gonna use it on Snivellus but... all things considering, I think tonight is a better opportunity, doncha agree?
Remus took the vial, eyes widening a bit. "Oh. Oh! How would we make sure they get some? There isn't enough to put it in all the food, nor can we put it in only their food from the kitchens."
"No," James agreed. "We'd have to get into the Great Hall to put it in ourselves."
Remus frowned. "How are we going to do that? It'll be very crowded. We can't simply sneak in. Unless we hide up in the rafters beforehand, with your cloak, but that seems awkward as well as highly risky, even for a Marauder plan."
James had a look on his face. A look that said 'very bad idea'.
"What?" Remus asked, and James grinned. "What?!"
"I thought we could go in."
"What, just... walk in?" Remus snorted. "In case you haven't forgotten it's for dates."
That horrible grin. "I know."
Remus shook his head. "I have no intention of asking someone to the dessert so I can put Bubble Belches in Inkwood's dessert, as much as I want revenge."
"That's the thing. We don't really have to involve anyone else," James said.
Remus had a spike of nausea hit him as he imagined walking into the Great Hall as James's date. "I highly doubt that would be acceptable," he said, trying not to let the panic hit his voice. Then part of him wondered what would happen. Besides them both probably getting expelled for being offensive and indecently... err... criminal? Was it a crime? Wizards had been punished in the past… was it still a thing? Of course, he knew it was considered vile and reprehensible. But a crime? Hmm, he wasn't sure. Not that it mattered, of course. It really didn't matter.
"Ooh!" James laughed. "No, not like that."
"Like what then?!" Remus demanded, patience wearing thin.
James pulled a bit of parchment out from his pocket, handing it over. "This spell grows hair out, and we can change hair color."
"So?" Remus was baffled by whatever James was trying to say. It wasn't making any sense. "Please spit it out."
"Fine. We could go in if you're a girl," James finally said, quite bluntly.
Remus stared at him. Then began laughing so hard he dropped his book. He clutched his stomach, nearly rolling off his bed. "JAMES! Where in Merlin's name did you come up with that plan?!" he wheezed, rolling back and forth.
"I can't go as a girl," grumbled James. "Not enough Indian girls close to my age in school. You, though, could be mistaken for quite a few people. As long as you kept your head down so nobody saw your eyes."
"Like who?!"
"I dunno, any first year, really, they're tiny—OW!" James recoiled as Remus smacked his arm. "Okay, okay, it was just an idea! Never mind, then."
"Bloody right never mind!" Remus snapped, straightening up, face burning at the thought of dressing up like a girl and going to the Valentine's dessert as James's 'date'. It was utterly ridiculous! Completely preposterous! Wholly and inconceivably stupid!
"It'd be really embarrassing for Inkwood," James said slowly. "We could get revenge against her anytime but getting her on her first date with Sirius would really be..." he trailed off, smirking.
Remus shifted, not wanting James to get to him. "I am not dressing up like a girl," he hissed. "It'd be too... if we were caught—"
"Aw, if we were caught, we tell the truth," said James eagerly. "That it was for a prank."
Remus swallowed, feeling rather itchy all over. The worst part was he felt like he should. James (and the others) did so much for him, plus James got him the earplugs. And getting some revenge against Inkwood... "Why d'you want to?"
"Eh, mostly for Sirius, honestly," said James. "His assumption I've never been kissed—"
"But James, you haven't been kissed," Remus pointed out.
James's face went stormy. "Right, except he assumed! So, I want to prank him. Or Inkwood. Getting revenge against Inkwood for saying those things about you is also very good, eh?"
"I—I'd have t-to wear a sk—skirt!" he squeaked. "Where'd we even get one?"
"Um, yeah, we could maybe borrow one from Evans? Would she be willing?"
Remus twisted his finger into the hem of his jumper, bile rising in his throat as he imagined himself dressing up like a girl. It was too much, too embarrassing, too humiliating! No. No way! He couldn't do it.
Except, James did get him the earplugs... and James wanted to do this... and the earplugs...
And Inkwood...
Those rumors!
"We wouldn't be able to get in any other way," said James in a tempting manner. "You'd be really disguised. I promise."
"You can't promise any such thing," Remus grumbled, anxiously running his fingers through his hair. "There are a hundred ways it could go wrong. How would we even get near Inkwood without them seeing you?"
"Peter," James answered. "I'll tell him to sit at a table so Sirius and Inkwood are facing away from the door. We sit behind them, and use a spell. I can provide a distraction—I'm good at that—while you use the levitation spell to put it in Inkwood's drink. Maybe Sirius's too, if you have time."
Remus chewed at his nails, tempted. Way too tempted. There was a buzzy feeling all over his body as he felt himself being pulled into the prank.
James tilted his head. "Hasn't the rumor grown to the two of you snogging?"
"Y—yes," Remus whispered. Then he gave a loud groan, covering his face. "I'll ask Lily."
"YES!" James hugged him tightly. "This is going to be absolutely amazing!"
"If you breathe a word of this to anyone I will personally kill you," Remus threatened, swinging his legs out of bed. He wanted to add that James owed him except that wasn't true; if anything, Remus owed James so much. More than this. More than he could ever repay.
James held his hand over his heart. "I solemnly swear not to tell a single soul. It'll stay between you, me, and Evans. From me, at least; I can't promise about Evans."
Remus stalked out of the dorm, torn between feeling anxious over dressing up like a girl and feeling a little excited over getting Inkwood back. And also feeling sick. Very sick.
/\/\/\/\/\
"WHAT?!" Evans shrieked.
Remus ducked his head, feeling like he might throw up despite the fact he had already thrown up after leaving his dorm. He stammered out James's idea again, trying not to mumble, and finishing with the fact he'd need to dress as a girl and could he borrow a skirt? Maybe a jumper too?
Lily goggled at him. "Bloody hell, Remus!"
"Yeah, it's—it's dumb but James really wants to," he said swiftly. Awkwardly. This was so bloody awkward.
"He wants to get revenge on Cassie?" Lily asked, a little suspiciously.
"Yeah, well—he's my friend and is mad on—on my behalf. Besides, Sirius irritated him a bit today."
Lily shut her book, frowning at Remus. "Has Sirius said anything about the whole Cassie thing?"
"Not really," Remus muttered, glancing across the room at where Sirius and Peter were chatting with Inkwood and Colgate. "I—oh, come with me." He made sure nobody was looking before he grabbed her hand, pulling her to the stairs. Almost immediately he let go of her hand; the last thing the rumors needed was the sight of them holding hands going up to his dorm! He took another quick look to make sure they were still unobserved, then darted up the stairs with her on his heels.
"Oi, what's she doing here?!" James demanded when the two of them burst into the dorm.
"Helping you, apparently," Lily responded tartly.
Remus gave James a tentative smile. "I was thinking..." He shut the door behind them, locking it. "Perhaps Lily can slip the potion in. That way we don't need to risk getting caught."
Lily folded her arms. "I doubt that will work. I'm so mad at her right now, if I go anywhere near her table she'll know it was me. Besides, I was thinking... if you need a distraction, you should have the distraction far from you, right?" she asked, then continued speaking without waiting for either of them to answer. "I could sit on the other side of the room and provide the distraction. That way you risk yourselves even less."
James perked up. "Really? You'd do that?"
"Mmm, yeah... what sort of distraction were you thinking?"
"Fireworks. The classic distraction."
Lily laughed. "Then it would probably be best if I do set them off, otherwise they might be near enough to your table."
"I wasn't going to set them off at my table!" James protested.
"Oh, you were going to walk across the room and possibly have Black see you?" Lily demanded. "Plus if you are sneaking around the edges of the room, the chaperones are going to get you right off the bat."
James opened and shut his mouth, then glared. "Right, well, um, look, I—"
"I set the fireworks off, you two get Cassie," Lily said, then offered her hand. "Deal?"
James eyed her hand suspiciously then slowly took it. "Deal," he agreed, then wiped his hand off on his trousers while Lily wrinkled her nose, staring at her hand in disgust. "Also not only can we never speak of this for Remus-as-a-girl's sake, but if anyone finds out we made a temporary truce—"
"I'd rather clean the dungeons with my toothbrush than anyone else find out we're working together," Lily finished for him, and James nodded.
"Um, about that," Remus said, clearing his throat. "If Lily's doing the distracting then you could slip the potion into Inkwood's drink. You could take someone else, and I wouldn't have to dress up as a girl."
James adjusted his glasses. "You've got better control over your spells than I do. I probably could levitate it in but you'd do it better. Faster, not as wobbly. Less risk of her seeing it. Besides, don't you want to see it?" he added, and Remus gave a reluctant nod. He did really want to see it, but dreaded the thought of being caught in a skirt!
"How 'bout I get an outfit together for Remus then we can meet up somewhere to go over the plan," Lily said, checking her watch which made Remus glance at the clock. It was already a quarter to five! The dessert started at six-thirty! They didn't have much time to iron everything out, and he hoped everything would go smoothly.
/\/\/\/\/\
Half an hour later, James and Remus were in an unused classroom waiting for Lily. Remus had gotten food while James made excuses to Sirius, as well as whispered some orders to Peter without explaining about Remus's involvement. Now they were picking at their supper, waiting for Lily to show up. Remus wanted to remark on how amazing it was the two of them were willing to work together, especially after what happened at breakfast, but he didn't want to jinx it.
"Your spell is incredible," James said as one of his multiple heart bubbles bobbed against his head. "Can't believe they've lasted this long." Remus glowed a little, remaining silent. "You're seriously the most talented kid in our year and probably—"
"I've already agreed to do this, you don't need to keep buttering me up," Remus said.
"Naw, it's true."
There was a gentle tap at the door and James opened it up, letting Lily in. She had a bundle of clothes in her arms. Remus shrank back, heart pounding hard as he realized what exactly he had agreed to. Lily dropped the clothes on a chair and began holding them up, having brought multiple outfits for him to choose from. There were two dresses, two skirts, three jumpers, a long-sleeved top, and something Lily called a pinafore dress. In addition, she brought tights, socks, and an assortment of shoes.
"And to finish it off...!" Lily produced her witch's hat, the tall pointed hat all students bought but hardly anyone wore except for special occasions. Normally they were black but she had enchanted hers to be white, temporarily. "You can wear it a bit low to help keep your face hidden."
Remus moaned, scratching at his arms. "I think I'm coming out in hives. I don't know if I can do this."
"You do realize how long it's going to take us to convince people we aren't a couple, right?" Lily asked.
He froze, then scowled. "All right, let's figure out an outfit."
After much discussion, Lily finally settled on a pink turtleneck jumper and the white pinafore dress. She added tights and white shoes, pushing him towards the closet to get changed.
"I can't wait to see this!" James giggled.
Remus shot him a glare over his shoulder then dove into the closet, locking it with his wand to make sure James wouldn't try to come in. He felt very uncomfortable stripping down with them in the other room, but he didn't have much of a choice. He just hoped he could figure the dress out. The jumper got pulled on easily, though it was rather big on him, and the dress wasn't too difficult. The tights were another thing entirely. He realized too late he should have put them on first. He hitched the skirt up, somehow getting the tights on though a strange tear appeared in them. It wasn't a real tear—not all the way through—but it looked weird. The tights were rather baggy and he had to yank them way up. Finally, he put the shoes on before pulling the skirt back down, smoothing it out.
Bloody. Hell.
He debated taking it all off, putting his uniform back on, and running home. Dropping out of school was definitely the better option.
"Are you done? It's after six," Lily called out. "We still need to do your hair and I still need to get dressed!"
Remus wrapped his arms around himself, not moving. This is a stupid plan, a stupid prank. They're pranking me more than they are Inkwood! Maybe that's what it was. Maybe James just wanted to prank Remus by getting him in a skirt to laugh at him.
"C'mon, Remy!" James said. "I still need to get dressed too."
Remus sucked in some air, and unlocked the door, creeping out. He knew he was beet red as he waited for the laughter. James snorted, and covered his mouth, curling in on himself trying to stop the laughter. Lily, however, clapped her hands, insisting he looked great.
"I look bloody ridiculous," he grumbled, tugging at the skirt. He had never worn traditional wizarding robes, so this was the first time wearing something like that. Unless one included nightshirts, which were very different.
"You make a super cute girl," Lily promised. "Oh, you're adorable! All the boys would be after you."
James began choking while Remus contemplated jumping out the window.
"I think we might have to do something with your hair once it's lengthened, since I can't really style it quickly..." Lily licked her lips as she began tapping the top of his head, doing the spell to make his hair grow out. His scalp began itching while his hair wriggled, then shot down to his shoulders into a mess.
James shrieked with laughter, unable to contain himself anymore. He flopped onto his back, legs wheeling.
"I thought you said you needed to get dressed!" Remus snapped.
"This is loads better!" he wheezed out. "I had no idea how shaggy your hair really was! Bloody HELL, Remy, you're a true lion, aren't you? That's a mane!"
Lily began running her fingers through his hair. "It'll be fine. I can fix it. Potter, go get dressed."
"Right here?" he asked with a smirk.
"If you do, I'll throw you into the corridor and lock you out," she threatened.
James stuck his tongue out as he grabbed his clothes and headed to the closet.
Lily got a brush from her satchel, working at his hair until she got it somewhat manageable. Remus sat quietly, trying to pretend this was completely normal. That he wasn't sitting there in a dress that kept riding up. He wriggled, tugging the dress back down.
"What color are we going with?" Lily asked when James popped back out. He hadn't needed to worry about tights, so it had taken him about five seconds. "Blonde, or dark brown?"
James was in a suit, looking quite dapper. "Hmmm. A light brown maybe? Blonde-brown? That's a kinda common hair color, isn't it?"
Lily nodded as she got a vial out of her bag. "What's that?"
"I figured a potion would work best," she said. "I've never used a spell to change my hair color."
Remus clutched at his hair. "A potion is more—more permanent! It's harder to get rid of!"
"I've also got one that will rinse it out," she promised, uncorking the vial. "It'll be fine!"
Remus whimpered a little, trusting Lily for the most part. She emptied the vial out on his head, brushing the potion through his hair until the entire thing was a light sort of brownish-blonde color without a hint of tawniness. He glared at the light fringe hanging over his eyes. Lily plopped the hat on his head, pulling it low so the brim shaded his face.
"Now I need to get ready," she said, grabbing some of the clothes she brought and running to the closet.
James marched over, standing in front of Remus with a contemplative look on his face.
"Go ahead and laugh," Remus mumbled, ducking his head.
"No. You do look good. You make a cute girl. It's actually kinda disturbing."
"This better be worth it."
James bent in, a cheeky grin on his face. "Bubble Belches on her first date, come on!"
Remus managed a smile and reached up, tucking some of his long hair behind an ear. "All right yeah, it's going to be funny."
Lily flounced back in the room, wearing a red dress and pushing a white headband on. "How do I look?"
"Disgusting," James said.
"You look very pretty," Remus said.
"Absolutely vile. I might throw up," James continued.
Lily looked down her nose at him. "Now you know how I feel every time I have to look at you. Now. When you're ready, give me a signal. I'll pretend to drop my spoon in order to get the fireworks out of my bag and set them off."
"I'll clap my hand," James said, giving a little clap. "How's that?"
"Fine, yeah." Lily tucked several fireworks into her bag. "I need to go meet David. Good luck, both of you." She gave Remus a smile and then ran out of the room, hair bouncing.
"I feel sick," Remus moaned, standing up.
"Honestly, mate, I don't think I'd recognize you," James said, patting his shoulder. "Not with that hair."
"Who am I even supposed to be?!"
"I dunno, some first year."
"I could be a third year—oh, stop it," Remus complained as James began laughing. "I could be a third year girl. Some girls are smaller, like me."
"Stick some oranges down your jumper then," James snickered. Remus couldn't help but giggle at that. "Nooo, you need to have a higher giggle. You're a girl." Remus tried a higher pitched giggle. "Yeah, that's better. Also, try to look at me like I'm the most amazing and sexiest person in the universe."
Remus smacked James's arm. "I'll look at you like a slug, if you keep that up."
"At least seem vaguely interested," James said, messing his hair up. "I'm not a terrible date. I'll buy you chocolates. Don't roll your eyes at me, I'll really buy you chocolates. I'm a nice date!"
It was 6:40 when they reached the Great Hall, and James linked his arm with Remus's. Remus kept his head ducked low as they went through the door, so the staff members at the door didn't see his face.
"Hello James," said a woman.
"Hello Urja—er, Professor Shafiq," James replied, hurrying through the door, pulling Remus along. "Course it's gotta be my bloody cousin," he muttered. "She's going to write my mum. Oooh, good, Peter and Colgate are facing the door, Sirius and Inkwood have their backs to us. Over here." He guided Remus to a small table, pulling the chair out.
Remus sat down, feeling weird as James pushed the chair in, but all weirdness faded when he saw Sirius whispering in Inkwood's ear. Inkwood, who decided to tell everyone in the world that Remus and Lily kissed. Ugh! He wanted to dump the Bubble Belch in her drink right away.
"You'll burn a hole in the back of her head," James whispered.
Remus glanced down at the table. There were delicate white and pink doilies underneath very pretty china. There was also a little menu with the instruction to tap what he wanted with his wand to 'order' it. There were so many mouth-watering options that Remus thought dressing up as a girl might be worth it just for this!
"Merlin!" James said as Remus tapped several options.
"I hardly ate," Remus pointed out, setting the menu aside. His drink appeared almost immediately—well, both of them; one glass of water, one of cherry soda which he quickly took a gulp of.
"She's over there."
"Who?"
"Evans!" James hissed out.
Remus was too distracted by the chocolate-y delights appearing on the table. A piece of fudgey chocolate cake, a frozen cauldron, a honeybob delight, treacle tart, and a syllabub made with grape juice instead of wine.
"Merlin's dirty socks, R—!" James quickly cut himself off. "Are you really going to eat all of that?!"
Remus scooped up a big spoonful of ice cream, shoving it into his mouth. "Yes?"
"A lady doesn't stuff her face like that."
"After trying to get these tights on, a lady can eat whatever she damn well pleases."
James held his hands up. "Okay, sheesh, Got it. How soon should we do this?"
"Hmmm?"
"Are you even paying attention?!"
"This frozen cauldron is really good," he said, scooping out more ice cream. "Try it."
James picked up a spoon, scooping up a large amount. "Mm, it is good." He stole another spoonful, and Remus was glad he didn't have to worry about contamination from his wolf saliva. "All right. Ready?" He slid the vial of Bubble Belch over to Remus.
"Can't I finish this first?"
"Oh, blimey!"
Remus plowed through the rest of the frozen cauldron, wiped off his mouth, and took the vial. "Ready."
James nodded, glanced over at Lily, and, once she looked his way, he turned to his plate of food, clapping his hands like he was excited to eat it. Out of the corner of his eye, Remus saw Lily drop a spoon. She bent under the table for a few seconds then straightened up, a picture of innocence. About ten seconds later several rockets whizzed out from under her table, exploding in the air.
Remus pulled the lid off the vial before flicking his wand as discreetly as he could. "Wingardium leviosa."
Everyone was watching the fireworks go off, far too busy to notice the small vial sliding along the floor, floating up the side of a table, and tipping over into Inkwood's glass. Remus jerked his arm, pulling the vial back quickly.
"Success," he whispered, scooping up a spoonful of syllabub.
Professors McGonagall and Flitwick were investigating the area where the fireworks went off, talking to some of the students who were all shaking their heads. The fireworks had shot out far enough that nobody really realized they came from Lily's table. Not that anyone would suspect her anyway!
"Blast it," James hissed. "Head down, head down!"
"Huh?" Remus saw McGonagall making her way over. He swore, and ducked his head low, letting some of his hair fall across his face.
"Mr. Potter," McGonagall said, giving him a dark look. "Did you have anything to do with the fireworks?"
"Regrettably not," James replied casually. "Though I do have some in my bag. May I set them off too?"
Beyond them, Remus could see Inkwood take a swig of her drink.
"No you may not!" McGonagall snapped, then turned her attention on Remus. He practically had his face down in his treacle tart, waiting for her to question him or take off the hat. "If I find out you've lied," she continued, turning her attention back to James.
Inkwood began burping loudly, bubbles of various colors pouring out of her mouth whenever she did. She covered her mouth, eyes huge. Remus could hear Sirius laughing, asking what happened, if she ate some soap before coming to dessert.
"You should give me detention, just in case," James said cheerfully.
McGonagall made a rather irritated noise and swept off to go question Sirius. James swore, and suggested they get out before McGonagall indicated he was there, or blamed them for Inkwood burping up bubbles; it was practically a steady stream at this point. Every time the bubbles burst, another belch sounded, several times louder than the original burp. They echoed across the hall and pretty much everyone was laughing.
"I'm still eating!" Remus protested as James took hold of his arm.
"Take it with you! Unless you want Sirius to see you in a dress?"
Remus paled at that HORRIFYING thought. Quickly he dumped all his food on one plate before running out of the Great Hall with James. Running in a dress wasn't the easiest. It was a little restricting, and he would have ruined all his food when he tripped if James hadn't noticed and seized the plate. Remus went down, bashing into the floor.
"I figured you would've rather me save the chocolate instead of you," James said, hauling Remus up on his feet.
"You're absolutely correct," Remus said, taking the plate back.
They took one more peek into the Great Hall to see the bubbles surrounding Inkwood's head, then hurried off, both of them giggling. They went up to the classroom where they had met with Lily, and Remus perched on a chair while James changed. Remus stuffed half the cake slice in his mouth, dropping fudgey crumbs all over Lily's clothes.
"Oophs," he said, spraying more crumbs.
"What's wrong?" James asked. He was changing in the room, not caring that Remus saw him naked though Remus kept his gaze averted.
"Gettin' chocolate all over the thingie. Um, dress." He tried to wipe the crumbs off and only succeeded in smearing the chocolate. "Drat. Who gets white clothes anyway?"
"Evans, apparently. Girls are neater than boys though."
Remus licked his fingers off. "Not entirely true. I'm not very messy."
James stared at him. "First all, how many books are all over your section of the dorm? Second of all..." He walked over, pointing at a large chocolate smear. "Plus you can't dress yourself, and always spill stuff on yourself."
Remus knocked his hand away. "Go put your trousers on. Least I don't leave my pants and dirty socks all over the floor."
"What's wrong with that?" James asked as he finished getting dressed.
He finished licking the chocolate off his fingers and got up, setting the plate on the chair. "It's disgusting, that's what."
It wasn't as much of a struggle getting out of the clothes than it was getting in them, except the tights got shredded even more. He felt horrible for it and hoped they weren't too expensive to replace. Perhaps he could do a few essays for James to get some money to give to Evans.
It felt great being back in his own clothes buuuuut his hair was still a long, shaggy mess. "What do we do about this?" he asked, going back into the room. "It's still blonde. And long."
"I can cut it," James offered, producing his wand.
"You ate the rest of my cake!" Remus cried out, seeing chocolate smeared on James's lips.
"A little bit, there's still a bite or two left. I didn't eat at the dessert." He took a hank of Remus's hair, pulling it out a bit.
"What are you doing?"
"The severing charm—"
Remus hopped away from him. 'I don't think so! We only just started learning them in Charms and when you did it you somehow fused your robes sleeve to the parchment! It took Flitwick ten minutes to undo it!"
James pouted. "It was an accident! What, you want to go around with long hair?"
Remus pulled his hair back, holding it like a ponytail. "No. I'll do most of it myself..." He pulled the ponytail around, aiming his wand.
"You could hit your shoulder," James said.
"I'll heal."
James's eyes went huge at that. "Bloody hell, Remus!"
"What?"
Slowly he shook his head. "Nothing, I guess."
Remus hesitated, not sure anymore. James looked rather upset and was eyeing Remus's wand. "I'll wait for Lily," he said, dropping his hand. He didn't care so much if he accidentally cut himself, but he didn't want to make his friend distressed. Plus, it'd also cut his clothes and he didn't want that to happen. "Besides, she needs to turn my hair back to its normal color."
Lily didn't show up for quite a while, a little surprised to find both boys waiting for her until Remus indicated his hair. Lily chopped it off a little short (he'd have to go to the hair witch, whom he usually tried to avoid; too many images of that stupid Christopher Robin cut. He hadn't had his hair cut since that particular incident until now), and then changed the color back. Remus raked his fingers through his hair, forgetting entirely he still had sticky fingers from the cake.
"You did look cute," Lily promised.
Remus made a face. "Urgh."
"Cassie was so mad, by the way," Lily went on, ignoring Remus. "She left. So did Black. I'm gonna talk to her in a bit, since I think she was crying."
"So?" James grumbled. "She deserves it, for what she did to Remus!"
"I must admit, it's a little difficult to muster sympathy," Remus said.
Lily shrugged. "I know what you mean. Anyway, go away so I can change."
"You changed in there earlier with us here," James said, jumping aside as Lily threw her hat at him. "All right, going. Nobody wants to see that anyway, Evans! I'll go blind!"
"From what I understand, Potter, you're practically blind as it is!" she retorted.
Remus clamped a hand across his mouth to prevent the giggling, while James scowled. "Yeah, make fun of the boy wearing glasses, Red, I see how it is."
Lily smiled back. "Only with your glasses."
Remus doubled over as he choked, while James snorted. "Glad this truce is over!" he snapped then grabbed Remus, dragging him out. "She's such a cow. Plus thanks for not laughing at her making fun of me."
"S-sorry!" he snickered, trying to stop. "I am sorry."
"Hmph."
The two boys left and once they had gone down the hall a bit, James threw his arm around Remus, obviously over his hurt feelings as he declared it a victorious prank. Remus had thought it was a bit too elaborate for a small payout, but the dessert definitely made up for it, hands down.
