Enjoy!
Christine
Chapter 98
The Aftershocks
The next morning, I could walk without assistance.
We took Echo Hall to Nadir's house, but Erik whispered in my ear that, now, they'd have to do away with the Echoes. These secret halls would not be of use after we were gone.
He explained that the Prince now knew. Even if I hadn't burst through the wall, Nadir had explained everything to Izad. The reason behind the secret spies. The fact that Izad's father had put the system in place - but Nadir had to explain why the particular guards he'd chosen would not listen when the Shah gave a command. He also no longer wanted to be Daroga, no longer wanted to subject his Echoes to the life they lived.
The Echoes, now, would be released from their duties. They would be free.
But they also knew too many secrets, and so would be exiled, each to a different country. No one in Persia would ever know they existed. Any information they held would be mere hearsay if spoken aloud.
And, he told me, as we approached the house, Izad's first decision as Shah would be to do away with the Garden. The Flowers would be sent back home.
I'd stopped mid-step. I turned to look at him. He smiled. I felt relief well in my eyes - all those girls. All of them. They would be free as well.
He caught me and held me the moment I began to cry very, very happy tears.
When we arrived through Nadir's study, we were both surprised to find him seated in his armchair, staring down at a large flat book. There were drawings in it - very good drawings. The sketch he currently looked at was of-
I blinked.
It was of Nadir. A very good likeness. But this Nadir was smiling, with genuine happiness in his eyes.
"Daroga," Erik said by way of greeting. He paused very briefly, looking at the drawing as well, before making his way toward the closed study door. Erik opened it. I made to follow, when-
"You were right," Nadir whispered.
We both turned to look at him, and to my utter shock, when he lifted his face, there were tears glistening on his cheeks.
Erik let go of the doorknob. The door remained open. "Nadir?"
"You were right. Both of you," he repeated. A tear fell onto the drawing. "It didn't make a difference."
"What didn't?"
"The Shah's suffering." His face contorted. "It didn't bring her back."
Rookheeya, I realized with a pang of sadness. His wife.
"It knew it wouldn't," he said, looking the very opposite of the drawing on his lap, "but now - now I have nothing to distract myself from this grief. I'd pushed it aside, focused on my hatred of the Shah - but it hadn't filled me. It only made me empty." He closed his eyes. "You were right. This wasn't the answer. If Rookheeya could see what I'd become-"
He sobbed, leaning forward, dropping the sketchbook to the floor, taking his spectacles off and putting his palms to his eyes. I went to the book quickly and picked it up. I put it on the table next to him, where he had a full glass of wine. A near-empty bottle too. When I glanced at Erik, his wide eyes reflected the shock I felt. The pity as well.
Nadir noticed what I was doing. He brought his shaking hands away from his eyes. "She was an artist like you, Christine."
I didn't say anything.
He shook his head. "Everything - all of this. So pointless." He stared down at his shaking hands, then clenched them. When he spoke next, his voice was loud, gravelly. "So pointless!" He picked up the bottle and threw it against the wall. It shattered, painting purple spots on the yellow walls. I started, backing up.
Erik sucked in a breath. "Nadir."
"I will never see her again! Ever! She is gone, and nothing I've done these past few years will ever change that. The Shah's death can't change that. Rookheeya - my Rookheeya-" He sobbed again. "What is the point? What is the point, if I've give my entire life to the purpose of avenging her, only for it to make me feel even darker, even emptier - why in Allah's name am I alive? Why-"
Erik left the room. Stay here, he whispered in my ear.
And I think Nadir felt sorry for himself, thought that Erik was disgusted by his outburst, for he once again burst into tears.
I only stood, unsure what to say or do, as I watched this ruthless, cold, calculating man break apart completely in his grief. Watched as what really lay underneath came to the surface.
Erik at last arrived, and when I saw what was in his arms, I realized where he'd gone, and why.
"Nadir," Erik said softly. "Look."
The Daroga did. And his face went blank when he saw Reza.
"Father?" he said.
"Reza." Nadir's voice was a mere breath.
"Erik said you were sad."
The Daroga closed his eyes, more tears falling down his face.
"This is why," Erik said to him. "This is the point."
Nadir opened his eyes again, staring up at his son. He grimaced with emotion. "He looks more and more like his mother everyday." And then he stood. He opened his arms, and Erik paced Reza within them.
The Daroga gripped the only family he had left with all of his might, one arm under his legs and the other wrapped around his back. Nadir held himself together for a few moments more, then had to sit back down with the weight of his sobs. He buried his face into his son's shoulder.
After a few seconds, he brought his face up and kissed his cheek, bringing a hand to his head. "I love you, Reza."
Reza held on tight. Extremely tight. So tight that he seemed to squeeze even more tears from Nadir's eyes.
"I love you too, Father."
