Hi,
Finally something that Rex had never considered.
Sued13
CHAPTER Sixty Nine
"Have you sent the message Essie?"
"Yes, hours ago. There was no reply."
Essie paced up and down the dining room; "She's early, there's another 3 weeks to go."
"She'll be fine, Jay checked her. I've notified him as well."
Tula checked all the instruments again; although she knew she was perfectly capable of delivering a baby, Ana was old for a mother and with her problems in the past but she had been given the all clear to travel by the rebel Doctors and Jay had also checked her over, when she first arrived and several times since..
The sound of a speeder engine throttling back permeated through the night; he was here. Both she and Essie had had reservations when they saw how old he looked but then Ana had explained what the Cloners had done to the soldiers of the GAR, on the instruction of Palpatine and that made her angry, very angry and a Rebel.
The clones had proved themselves in her eyes.
Tula! Essie!" Rex's voice emerged from the shuttle before he did and then he was followed by his brothers, the new uncles. Tula was glad they affected different hairstyles but had realised they also had different mannerisms and carried themselves differently. They pushed some transport containers ahead of themselves.
"Baby stuff." Said one, with a little giggle.
"How much do you think we need?" She asked, laughingly "we already have loads, everyone seems to have given her something." It started with the Twins.
"Tula?" That was Ana's voice, "They're coming quicker now."
Tula swore she saw Rex blanche. "Do you want to be there?" He nodded.
Rex joined Ana, scanning the room and it met his approval. A bed, several large cushions, a nursing chair. Clean and tidy.
Ana was leaning on one of the large cushions, legs either side and arms braced against it. She looked warm. He immediately went to her but had no idea what to do; Of course he had read all the information he could find on human births, in between training new special forces Commandos and creating guerilla tactics for them. It was hard work and he wasn't young any more ...and, if truth be told he still missed Cody.
Why had his brother obeyed?
Technically, Wolffe was as good but he still wasn't Cody; the loss still affected him.
Ana had grabbed his hand and squeezed hard; she panted, breathing out. He realised that she was having a contraction and could see beads of sweat appear on her face, as she breathed through it. Kneeling there with her, he felt helpless; there was nothing he could do to stop the pain. It was just as during the war, when his brothers were in pain and dying, now he knew how Kix had felt when he couldn't help them.
It was taking too long; he knew it could be problematic for older women and she was short. He had read somewhere, short women could have more problems in childbirth. Ana looked tired, drained. She stood up and back down again, leaning over a different large cushion. He wiped her face with a wet towel and received a small smile in return. She pointed to her back, so he started rubbing it again; he could see her relax, so it must be helping. Within minutes she changed position again, lying on the bed.
"Some water, please." She implored Rex, he jumped up to go and get it but from the other room, before he could return, he heard the scream. Rushing back she was now on her knees panting out, just as he had seen in the vids.
"Not long now." Declared Tula. Ana replied with some choice huttese, which Rex didn't know she knew. He came around to her and she grabbed him by the neck to hold on.
"You're so beautiful, you know, so brave. You can do this." He whispered holding her up. He felt her tense and then a low scream that seemed to go on forever, as Tula bent behind her.
"One more Ana and it's out."
Rex had never imagined it would be like this, his wife, the woman he loved with his life was in so much pain and he could do Fek all about it.
She turned on her back; he was amazed she could still move.
Another scream and now she was straining, chin pressed down on her chest, the vein on the side of her head was bulging.
Fek Fek Fek. She'll hurt herself.
Then he heard it. The screeching sound and Essie lifted a small wriggling, writhing, blood smeared body and placed it on Ana's breast.
She looked so happy.
He was transfixed.
He felt a jab in the back of his ribs, "So go and meet your daughter. No wait, Essie. Clean the baby up I need to sort Ana out. She pushed Rex out of the way.
The next few minutes were a whirl of activity with accompanying mewling from the baby and tears from everyone else in the room. He vaguely remembered helping Ana back onto the bed, Tula giving him a little bundle that was making a sound like a Tooka, and didn't look much better at first. He placed their daughter in her mother's arms and knelt down beside them, oblivious to everyone around them.
This was something he had never imagined in all his wildest dreams.
.
The piercing scream came from behind the closed door; Wolffe had heard screams like that before, on the battlefield, from his brothers.
This can't be right. Something is wrong.
"She needs you now!"
A strong hand on his arm stopped his instinctive move forwards.
"Not You, Ner Vod." Gregor's hissed command pushed into his thoughts, as Essie had shouted through the slightly open door.
He saw Rex, gather himself, as if preparing for the worst, put the water down, step forward and go through the door. Wolffe had never believed in any God but this had been going on for hours and that last scream…..so he wished he did now, then he could pray to them. He feared the worst now and shaking off Gregor's arm he paced, up and down the room. There had been a few more screams but nothing like that first one and now it had been quiet for a long time, too long; perhaps Rex was the right one in there.
.
Essie was making a racket in the other room but Ana didn't care she had been cleaned up and was comfortable; her daughter was finally feeding contentedly at her breast. The door opened tentatively and Rex slid in sideways; he had been to clean himself up. As soon as he came in, Ana felt the surge of love she always did, when she saw him. Baby finished feeding and was snoozing gently, whilst Rex stood at the door with his hands on his hips drinking in the scene.
"Come on, it's time you held her again. She needs to know her Father." Ana started wrapping her up ready for him to pick her up. He hesitated, appearing unsure. Ana waited patiently for him to come over, which he finally did and gently stroked the babies red hair, then he leaned over and placed his his forehead to hers. She now accepted that action, as his most intimate expression of his love for her.
He moved, turning his head, as he did; she put her hand to his face. It was wet she hadn't imagined it. She never seen it on Rex before.
Tears.
She brushed them gently away.
"Rex? Is something wrong with the baby?"
He shook his head.
"Are you disappointed, did you want a boy?"
He shook his head again.
"She's beautiful, perfect. It's just….I never…not in my wildest dreams."
Not even when I was arguing with Cut.
Not even when I was talking with Fives.
Not even when I was discussing our futures with Cody.
"I never thought I would be a...a Father."
'We can do it again…or at least try, for another."
"You need to recover first, be healthy."
Smiling, she thought.
I am the luckiest woman in the galaxy.
He couldn't take his eyes off her now; he was besotted already. Taking her gently in his arms he snuggled her up to his chest; he tensed at first and then as he settled down in the nursing chair, he felt his shoulders relax. He continually stroked his daughter's hair, as if willing her to sleep. This time was so precious and in it's own way relaxing.
Ana stood up and gingerly walked over to him; she was tired and needed to sleep but she couldn't miss this, the two of them together. There was a point in her life, when in her darkest times, she could never have imagined a scene like this, bending over him she kissed his unshaven head, with its bristles.
"You need a shave." There was a rumble in reply, he still didn't take his eyes off his daughter.
"I've thought of a name." Ana continued.
"Kallie."
"After the Sergeant?"
She nodded, "What do you think."
"It's a good name."
"So we are agreed on Kallie, as a name?" Rex rumbled another affirmative reply. But then added, "Bel as a middle name."
Now it was Ana's turn to cry; it was just like Rex to pick her Mother's name, "Go and introduce Kallie Bel to her uncles."
.
Gregor and Wolffe sat at the table with Essie, a bottle of Mandalorian Tihaar had been opened to 'wet the baby's head', Gregor had declared it was the most appropriate drink. Rex emerged from the bedroom holding a tiny white bundle, with a shock of red hair at one end; Gregor jumped up like a coiled spring, from the chair he sat on and Wolffe stood up then stopped dead.
"This is Kallie" Rex said, and then looking at his daughter, "These gentlemen are Commanders Wolffe and Gregor, your Uncles." Both peered intently at the tiny bundle and wanted to have a hold. While she was being fed, Essie had been explaining to them about babies and how to hold them and now they wanted to practice. After being passed around several people, Kallie finally decided she was hungry again and started mewling.
"Are they supposed to sound like a Tooka?" Asked Gregor, as Rex tried to soothe her.
Wolffe asked the question. "Is Ana ok?" His eyes kept flicking towards the baby.
Rex nodded, "Just tired, she's resting now."
Wolffe nodded, he should be happy for his brother but he would always have his regrets. He knew he should not dwell on them as he was now an Uncle and would be needed to be around to protect this child, his niece.
Wolffe could do that.
Wolffe would do that.
.
The bed was so inviting, sleep was so inviting; Ana heard Rex come in and the bed sank as he sat on it. She felt it move as he turned around next to her. She knew, she wasn't well, that something was wrong and it scared her, as she should be happy. She had a beautiful baby, a husband who adored her and who found time in the middle of a Galactic War to be with them both.
She was lucky.
So, why wasn't she happy?
Why did she feel something terrible was going happen?
"Cyar'ika, what's wrong." Rex voice was low and rumbled deep in his chest. He had surprised her, she was so engrossed in her thoughts, his arm encircled her waist and he went to kiss her.
She tensed and moved her head away from him. He looked hurt, bewildered.
"Ana?" He tried to ask what the problem was but she got up and headed for the fresher. Closing the door behind her, she locked it, avoiding him and she didn't know why.
She loved him.
She loved her daughter but was obsessed with keeping her safe. She checked on her hourly, even more; sometimes going back minutes after the last check just to be sure, to make sure she was breathing every time she slept; she rationalised that it was due to losing her other babies but it still didn't help. She couldn't stop it.
There was a rap on the door. "Ana? Are you Ok?"
"Yes, fine." She retorted in clipped tones and immediately regretted it. She felt awful, he was trying his best but everything he did seemed wrong, annoyed her, or irritated her and it shouldn't have. She listened and heard the bedroom door close, he had left again so she came out and checked on Kallie; she was fast asleep. Ana lay in the bed and tried to sleep again. She heard Rex come back in.
"Ana?" He asked with just a little hope in his voice but she feigned sleep. He leant over and kissed her cheek; it was good that he moved away, as he didn't see the silent tears falling from her eyes.
She didn't sleep but rose when Kallie woke up for her feed again and as she fed her, tears sprang up and she silently cried her way through it. Rex slept throughout totally oblivious to his wife's problem.
.
Rex found Gregor sitting outside, as Wolffe had been discussing blasters with Essie; he sat down next to him. "She's not right brother, there's something wrong with her and she won't tell me what."
"She worships the ground you walk on, that's her problem." Commented Gregor, without looking up. "She's put you on a pedestal and is frightened that she can't live up to you. The perfect soldier. She needs to be the perfect Mother, and wife, to be worthy of you."
Rex stared at Gregor, "How do you know that?" He asked incredulously.
"She said so, not in so many words but the meaning was there." He continued to check his datapad.
Rex was worried now, if there was something wrong with Ana, he needed to know; she had had some problems in the past and he didn't want her to be ill again. He didn't fully understand mental illness but knew they could be as debilitating as any physical injury.
.
Essie and Tula had been debating amongst themselves about what to do about Ana.
"She's not right, you know." Muttered Essie to her wife. "The post baby blues should be gone by now but they just seem worse." She shook her head and then went to put the plates away that she had just wiped. "Rex isn't helping, he should be doing something."
Tula tutted, "Give the man a break, he's still coming to terms with being a Father. He never even expected to live this long."
"Well!" Essie's hands landed on her hips, "I never expected you to defend a Clone."
Tula squirmed a little, "He's sort of won me over, all three of them have. They're so helpful, undemanding and Gregor is funny."
"So looks like we're stuck with them anyway." Essie's face took on a serious look again, "We should call Jay about Ana. " she continued.
"I'll get Rex first, I don't want him to think we're taking over.
It had been a difficult conversation but Rex had agreed that they call Jay, he had attended Ana after the birth and Rex was impressed with his expertise and manner, as in the past. Better than a droid any day and he said he would call the next day.
.
Ana watched her family at supper, as they all gathered around the large dining table; her Aunts, her daughter, Rex and his brothers they all sat together.
Kallie's lucky she has this family; she'll be safe.
They can all look after her in their own way.
Wolffe and Gregor will protect her and teach how to fight; she'll need that. Tula and Essie will teach her how to look after herself and everything else.
Rex...will be Rex. The best.
She'll be safe.
Safe from me.
I can't do this; can't be a mother..
Something will happen to her.
It's a dangerous galaxy and I can't protect her.
It's for the best.
She'll know no different.
She'll be safer with them.
Tonight.
Ana smiled her decision was made and the weight was lifted off her shoulders; she felt better already.
Rex was watching his wife closely after his conversation with her Aunts and yet tonight she seemed almost normal, a little preoccupied perhaps, but she was smiling now. He would try and talk to her later, as they had not discussed with her calling Jay out, they didn't want to frighten her.
.
Ana feigned sleep until she was sure that Rex had finally gone to sleep himself; she had given Kallie a good feed so she would sleep well herself and there was plenty of expressed milk in the conservator for her. All marked up. She slipped out from under the covers desperately trying not to disturb Rex, normally he slept lightly but she had pressed another Brandy on him at dinner so hopefully he would sleep.
Damn! He moved.
"Just going to the 'fresher love." She whispered and heard him mumble in reply. She watched him sleep for one last time before creeping over to her daughters crib, kissed her once on the forehead. "Forgive me." She whispered and tiptoed out of the door in her thin nightdress.
She shivered, as the cold air hit her, then headed off away from the house.
