Author's note: Two things… again haha. First of all, I am glad I posted that note on Friday because I've had some words of wisdom thrown at me and sense knocked into my head. I'm still having some trouble writing but I am starting to do better so most likely, no hiatus! :D We'll see how this week goes and I'll probably update you for sure next Tuesday.
Second of all… I have heard from members of my server that people have been posting positivity about this story on tiktok. I just want to say thank you so so much for enjoying the story and sharing it! One in particular I know really likes my James which is amazing~ so again, thank you for all the love and encouragement! If you post about SL on tiktok and feel comfortable sharing feel free to drop your tiktok name in a comment! I don't want to say any names myself because I don't know if anyone is comfortable with that. But again, thank you. 3 I am very appreciative of all this love.
Okay three things, I guess, sorry for such an early chapter. My sleep schedule has been really out of whack and I'd rather an early chapter than a late one!
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Remus didn't mention anything to the other Marauders about what Bones said. He wasn't sure what it had been about and didn't want to possibly stir up trouble. Except, in Herbology the next morning he was well aware of Bones's eyes on... them? On all of them? Or just Remus? It made him nervous all over again and he began dropping things even more than usual. He felt incredibly uncomfortable and once Sprout dismissed class he tried to hurry away.
"Oi! Marauders!"
Remus had gotten a decent distance from the greenhouse, quite far from his friends. He turned, biting his lip when he saw James, Sirius, and Peter stopping as Bones and his friend Rivers approached them. Remus glanced at the castle, then reluctantly slogged through the mud back to his friends.
"What's going on?" Sirius asked.
"Can we all talk alone?" Bones asked, eyes darting between the four Marauders while Rivers kept his eyes on the ground.
"What for?" James asked.
Bones grinned. "I'm not going to say in public."
He's going to accuse us of trying to break in, Remus realized. He didn't want to go with them but his friends agreed, so the five of them headed towards the castle. Not towards the doors, but towards one of the walls a decent ways away from the main path. Remus trudged after them, heart going faster with trepidation, although he didn't really know why he felt so afraid. What was the worst that could happen? A duel? The four Marauders would probably win. But... he had the feeling something was happening that wasn't a duel. What, though?
Once they were situated, Remus noticed James and Sirius were in slightly defensive positions while Peter didn't seem too concerned. Bones didn't seem concerned either, although Rivers kept kicking at some of the mud.
"What's the big secret?" James demanded, folding his arms.
Bones raked his fingers through his curly red hair, an awkward expression crossing his face. "Er, so—so the thing is, we were wondering... were you planning on getting back at Catterick even more? Revenge? Or breaking into the dorms?"
It was the exact same question he had posed to Remus the night before, and the Marauders seemed as surprised as Remus had the night before.
"What?" James laughed.
"Doesn't matter," Remus heard Rivers mutter.
Bones sighed. "Okay, look. I have a proposition for you." He shuffled a bit, probably trying to figure out how to explain whatever it was he had in mind. "Look," he said again, "I'm going to cut to the chase. Catterick—the guy you punched, Black—and his gang have been giving Donnie a hard time. We want to do something to them but... let's face it, you lot are the mastermind pranksters in this school. Anything you come up with is loads better than anything we could. We get you into the Hufflepuff dorms, you prank the tossers. Deal?"
Bones's hand shot out, hovering uncertainly in the air.
All the Marauders gaped openly. Remus was very startled by the request. It wasn't what he expected. Of course, he wasn't sure what he expected... but it definitely hadn't been that.
James looked at Bones's hand then at Sirius. "Can we confer for a moment?" James asked, tugging at Sirius's sleeve.
"Sure, of course," Bones agreed.
James dragged Sirius off with Peter and Remus following close behind. He pulled the four of them into a huddle. "Okay, what do we think?" he whispered. "Think it's a trick?"
"Yes," Sirius answered immediately. "It has to be. Catterick probably put them up to it, as revenge for me punching him."
"We don't need their help getting in anyway," added Peter.
James nodded at both of them. "Cool, yeah. Remy, you study with Bones. What do you think?"
"I—I'm n-not sure. He's never seemed v-very dishonest to me," Remus said. Was this really why Bones had been watching Remus? Wanting them to prank on his behalf? "We could ask what—why they want revenge on them."
"So... you trust it's not a trick?" James asked, eyes glued on Remus.
"I don't know."
They returned to the two Hufflepuffs, and asked them to expand on what happened between them and the older Hufflepuffs. Rivers seemed mortified, while Bones scowled, wanting to know what it mattered. James shrugged, saying they wanted details before agreeing to anything. Bones and Rives exchanged looks, and then Bones groaned.
"I don't want to go into exact details but they were harassing Donnie about something," he said. "They were teasing him."
"I thought Hufflepuffs were supposed to be the loving, nice ones?" Sirius asked.
Bones stared straight into Sirius's face. "And I thought Gryffindors were supposed to jump at the chance of doing something adventurous and dumb."
Rivers and Remus both snorted at that. Rivers caught Remus's eye and he gave an amused smile.
Sirius, however, didn't look amused at all. "If we're dumb, why would—"
James smacked Sirius's chest to shut him up. "We'll do it," he said. Sirius glowered at him.
Bones perked up. "Yeah?"
"Yup, we can hammer out the details at lunch?"
Bones offered his hand again and this time James shook it. They agreed to meet up for lunch together in an unused classroom at noon, then the Hufflepuffs went to the castle. As soon as they were out of earshot, Sirius whirled on James.
"If it's a trick, so what?" James asked before Sirius could say anything. He jammed his hands in his pockets and started strolling towards the doors; the other Marauders followed. "If they're telling the truth that means they're desperate enough to ask for our help, which means whatever happened is probably pretty bad. All right, so if they're not and it's a trick, we can get them back."
"I don't think it's a good idea," Peter said.
"Me either, I have a bad feeling," Sirius agreed. "But I guess we can. James is right. If it is a trick, ehhh, we can just get them back."
/\/\/\/\/\
When they went into the unused classroom at lunchtime, all of them were on edge in case that's when the Hufflepuffs pulled their trick, but Bones and Rivers were waiting without any trick in sight. The six of them sat on the floor with a pile of sandwiches and crisps in the middle. They chattered about various things before finally getting into the details. Catterick and his two pals (the three that had jumped Regulus) shared a dorm without anyone else, meaning the Marauders could get them there without risk of anyone else being pulled into the prank. Rivers even had a copy of their timetable so the Marauders would know when the third years were out. Remus began to grow a bit suspicious of this too. James seemed really eager.
Plus, Rivers also seemed really distressed. Remus didn't know him very well, they only ever interacted briefly in Herbology. Usually, he seemed pretty bright and vivid—a lot like James—but now he was sitting next to Remus, hands shaking very slightly as he ate. He kept giving Bones a distraught look whenever Bones mentioned the older boys. He smelled afraid too.
Either he was a damn good actor, or he had gone through some major bullying.
"Well, we have a few prankish ideas," James said, studying the third year Hufflepuffs' timetable closely. "I'd say Thursday would be a good time buuuut we might not be ready."
"What kind've ideas do you have?" Bones asked.
James peered over the paper, a smirk on his face. "You'll find out. We'll make it good, don't you worry."
"What's in it for us, by the way?" Sirius asked.
Bones blinked, opening and closing his mouth a few times. "Er, you get to pull off a fantastic prank in the Hufflepuff dorms and get back at the idiots who tried to hurt your brother?"
James started to say something, but Sirius clamped a hand over his mouth before giving the Hufflepuffs a very charming smile. "We'll need a little more than that."
Bones gave a slight huff. "What do you want? Besides access to the Hufflepuff common room."
"Well, that's something we could get on our own," Sirius said, hand still over James's mouth. "How about... reimbursement. Supply reimbursement. You won't need to until after we pull the prank since we're not sure what we're going to do."
Bones perked up. "Yeah, that's fine! As long as it's that and not, you know, you guys trying to convince us you needed five pounds of Honeydukes finest for the prank."
"Hmm, well there goes the chocolate prank," Sirius joked, and Bones grinned. Sirius finally let go of James, who sat back, fixing his glasses and scowling at Sirius.
The six of them continued talking as they finished eating; Remus didn't talk much, mostly due to feeling awkward, however when they headed out of the classroom, Remus asked Bones for a moment. Bones paused, waiting for Rivers to walk far enough ahead. Remus asked him how bad it was. Bones frowned, glancing at Rivers then back at Remus.
"Really bad," he said. "I've told him to go to Sprout, but..."
Remus looked at Rivers who had his arms wrapped around his middle, watching Bones and Remus with concern.
"We'll g-g-get them good," Remus promised, and Bones smiled.
/\/\/\/\/\
After Defense was over, the Marauders planned to hide out in the Pits Passage to begin their revenge plans. However, as they hurried off Inkwood called out Remus's name. Remus stared at her in shock, glancing at Sirius then back at Inkwood.
"Me?"
"Can we talk a minute?" she asked. "Privately?"
"Um…"
"Please?"
"You can meet up with us when you're done," James said, and he and the others left, whispering about what it could be about.
Inkwood went the other way, pausing to make sure Remus was following her, then led him into a side corridor where she began shifting her weight from foot to foot. Remus stood there in utter confusion, waiting for her to say something. When she finally did, he was shocked for the second time that day.
"I'm sorry." She pushed back some of her hair, face full of worry. "About what happened in the library. I was acting awful and dumb."
"Um. Er, no, it's—"
Inkwood smiled. "I know I was. I wanted to apologize for it. To you. I wasn't focusing on the project. I don't know, I guess…" She sighed, crossing the hall to sit down on a bench. Remus followed suit. "I just wanted Sirius to notice me."
Remus couldn't help but laugh at that. "Believe me, he n-notices you—"
"I know. But sometimes it feels like you lot are more important. Which is fine!" Inkwood added quickly, holding her hands up. "I get it. Lils and Ali are more important to me than Sirius, so I understand that. I definitely don't want to come between any friendships. I guess I got a little too jealous of you."
"Of… me?!" Remus had no idea what to make of that. "I—I'm sorry, what?"
"With how protective he is of you," she said simply. "Plus since you are best friends, I was a little afraid when we got together to study it'd just be you two and I'd be the third wheel. So I guess I acted up. To get his attention."
Remus hadn't thought of it that way. Suddenly her attitude made a lot of sense. Before he could respond, she continued talking.
"I want a fairer division of work," she said with a nod. "Please."
"Um. N-no, it—it's—it's f-fine," he stammered out, feeling like he was sliding down a slope with nothing to hold on to. "I'm v-very happy with—I'm happy with what we—with the—er, I like what we're doing."
"It's not fair on you—"
"Please," he managed to get out. "I do l—like it. Besides, we should—should use what we—we do best. You're not that into—into facts about dragons, so—so stories would be g-good for you. Sirius is good at art, and I—I'm a quick researcher. We're simply… utilizing the—the team the best we can."
Inkwood studied him for a few seconds then gave a gentle smile. "Do you accept my apology?"
"Of course," he said.
She bent in, kissing his cheek. "Thank you. If you need help with your stuff, please let me know, okay?"
"Ah—"
She stood up, grinning. "See you later." She rushed off, trainers pounding against the stone.
Remus slowly reached up, touching where she had kissed. It felt… it felt…
Disgusting.
He made a face, wiping his cheek off as he headed towards the Pits Passage, surprised but pleased by what just happened. It would make the rest of the project go a lot smoother.
The others hadn't started plans yet, they were waiting for Remus. They wanted to know what Inkwood wanted, and Remus replied that she had apologized if she had seemed overly rambunctious in the library, and that he forgave her. Sirius smiled at Remus, and he smiled back.
"Revenge!" James said, stretching his legs out. "Shame we've already used up a mandrake. That'd be perfect."
"We could use bulbadox powder," suggested Sirius. "That'd be pretty fun."
"That gives boils, right?" James asked, and Remus nodded as he wrote it down. "Oooh. Yes. Put it in their beds, or pants! Boils on their—"
"You could mix it in with their shampoo," said Peter.
James laughed. "Yes!"
There was a stretch of silence after that. Remus doodled along the edge of the paper then asked if there were any ideas besides the powder.
"It's a little hard to come up with pranks on demand," James pointed out.
"You come up with stuff all the time," Remus said.
James shrugged. "Yeah, when the mood strikes. This is a requested prank. It'll take a bit of time for the creativity to strike." He took his glasses off, wiping the lenses on his shirt. "The thing is, I want to do something big. You know? We've been doing really simple things lately. Put a potion in the drink, put the spell on the object—it's been so… drab. Dull. Boring. We need something… complicated!"
He grinned at his friends, the grin faded as he realized they were all staring blankly at him.
"What?"
"Something complicated?" Sirius asked. James nodded. "You mean like Remus inventing an entirely brand new spell that hasn't existed before in the time span of two weeks?"
"And us getting an adult to help us out by enchanting some ribbon with a powerful spell in order to do the prank?" Remus asked.
"And all of us sneaking out early in the morning under the cloak to stick the ribbon around the entrance hall to the most used room in the castle without getting caught?" Peter finished.
James stammered for a few seconds before looking away, obviously embarrassed. "Er—okay, well, uh, maybe we've done something complicated recently. But you know what I'm talking about, what I mean, right? I don't want to, say, dump some powder. Oh! Don't get me wrong," he added quickly, smacking Sirius's arm, "it's absolutely brilliant and I want to put bulbadox powder into someone's bed or pajamas. Snape's. But for this I want it to be…" He spread his hands out, eyes practically glowing. "Big."
"Flashy?" Remus asked, chewing at his quill.
"You got an idea there, Brains?" James asked eagerly.
"I might…" He drew some swoops along the parchment before nibbling at the quill again. "I'm thinking perhaps setting something up so when they open the door fireworks go off, and confetti explodes put up a big banner stretched across the room, and a plate with some cupcakes."
"You… want to… reward them," Sirius said slowly. "You want to throw them a party."
Remus grinned. "Sticking solution everywhere so the confetti is glued down, the banner says 'congratulations on being jerks!' and is coated in itching powder—or bulbadox powder, if you wish for that route—and underneath the cupcakes is a note saying 'hope you enjoyed your special cupcakes'. I mean, we don't do anything to the cupcakes but it should make them quite paranoid." He paused, then added, "If you want to put something in the cupcakes that's fine, I won't complain. I doubt they'll eat them anyway. I mean, who eats random cupcakes sitting out like that?"
All three of them were laughing hard, James clapping his hands.
"That's beautiful!" Sirius said, elbowing Remus. "Except the banner should say 'congratulations on being arseholes'."
Remus snorted. "That's fine, whatever you want."
Immediately everyone began talking about the possibilities, adding tweaks and additions. Peter thought enchanting noisemakers to fly around (just out of reach) would be fun, James wanted there to be a fanfare when they opened the door, and Sirius suggested they fill balloons with something and stick them to the ceiling so when the Hufflepuffs tried to pull them down it would release whatever was in the balloons.
Remus was really pleased that his idea had been accepted so easily. He felt that familiar thrilling shiver going through his body, and he couldn't stop grinning while he wrote down every idea they threw out for the 'party'.
/\/\/\/\/\
"Are we still exploring the passages tomorrow?" Aegis whispered as Remus slid into the seat next to him Friday morning. Slughorn asked everyone to pair up and since Sirius joined Inkwood, Remus went to Aegis.
"Yes, if you still want to," Remus answered. "We could meet on the fourth floor at ten? That entrance is closer to the one pit I told you about."
Aegis nodded excitedly. "I can't wait. I still think your idea is mental, but I rather hope it works out."
"It should… we'll test it before we go into one, of course. Oh, oof…"
"Are you all right?"
Remus covered his nose. "Yes. That really stinks."
Aegis bent in, sniffing at the ingredient. "Yes, it's rather smelly though it's not very bad for me unless I get close. I am sorry your nose is that sensitive. Isn't there anything you can do about it?"
Remus pulled the collar of his jumper up, not caring about the strange looks he got. "I might. I read about a spell healers used to use when they studied corpses and performed autopsies. I haven't had a chance to properly research it yet, though."
"Do you need help?"
"Er, if—if you really want to, I wouldn't say no. But you don't need to go out of your way to help me."
Aegis gave him a smile. "Helping you is never out of my way."
Remus smiled back. "Likewise. Anything you need, I'm here."
"Including dying Malfoy's hair."
He snorted and began giggling. "Especially dying Malfoy's hair."
The two kept giggling, trying to keep it quiet though some of the students around them gave them dirty looks. Remus heard behind them Mulciber call them a rather nasty name. Remus glanced over his shoulder, scowling at Mulciber and Avery's smirking faces.
Just ignore them, he told himself as he turned back to the cauldron. They're not worth it.
After class, however, he hit them both with the tripping jinx almost as soon as they started going up some stairs. They both stumbled and fell, falling down the few steps they had gone up already. The other Marauders laughed as they passed them, and Avery accused James of hexing him.
"Whoa there," James snickered, "no way. I've got more important things to do than trip up some baboons."
"Rather pathetic, thinking they're that important," added Sirius.
Avery growled and lunged forward, pulling out his wand. Sirius quickly hit him with the disarming spell, and James got Mulciber with it as well. Their wands went flying, and the Marauders breezed past them.
"With some of the spells we've been learning, it's getting easier to slip things into food without anyone noticing," Remus said, pretending to be quiet but purposely being loud enough for the two Slytherins to hear him. They both give him rather uncomfortable looks, and he tried not to laugh.
"Like what happened—" James began, then stopped. "Er."
"Oh, I was saying it only to make them worry," Remus explained as they were out of hearing.
"You're vicious," Sirius said, tousling Remus's hair.
There was a spike of those wrong feelings trying to overturn the box. Remus began mentally reciting the ingredients they used in today's potion and focused on the potion, which helped keep the box firmly down. His original plan had been thinking about school instead of worrying about girls, but thinking about school whenever that box was threatened also seemed like a good idea.
"Like what happened when?" Sirius continued, turning to face James.
"Huh?"
"You said 'like what happened', then stopped talking." Sirius jammed his hands in his pockets, gazing curiously at James. "What was that about?"
"Oh, I dunno—"
"Yes you do."
James cleared his throat and began fiddling with his glasses, muttering under his breath.
"Like the Bubble Belch?" Sirius asked, lips twisting in an amused smirk.
"Eh?"
"The Bubble Belch," he said slowly. "That you put in Cassie's drink at the Valentine's dessert. Is that what you mean?" James's face remained utterly impassive. "Aw, come off it, I know it was you."
"No. I didn't do that—"
"It's fine, really—"
Remus coughed. "Actually, I—I did that," he admitted, and Sirius and Peter's jaws practically dropped.
"You?"
"Uh, y—yeah." He began tugging at the cuff of his robes, feeling awkward about all this but not wanting Sirius to blame James. "Cause of the whole… gossip going on. The kiss thing."
Sirius blinked a few times then raked his hair back, frowning. "Oh. Wow. I didn't even think—I assumed it was James all this time."
"No," he whispered, ducking his head.
"Huh. All right. Sorry, Jimsy."
"Nah, it's fine, Siri."
Peter scratched his head, face screwed up. "But I didn't even see you! I saw James—"
"You did?" Sirius interrupted.
"Um…" Peter turned slightly pink. "Yeah. Uh, yeah, I did. But I never saw Remus!"
Thank Merlin, he thought, tugging at his collar now. James was very entertained and kept giving Remus looks, obviously waiting for an explanation. "Cloak," he finally said. "James's cloak."
James gave a soft snort and turned away, shaking his head a little.
"Ooh," Peter said, accepting the response although Sirius still seemed a little suspicious.
"You're not mad at me for doing that?" Remus asked, glancing at Sirius.
"Of course not, I thought it was hilarious," he said, punching Remus's arm lightly. "Cassie's over it, so it's in the past now."
Remus gave a slight sigh of relief.
Sirius kept talking. "I'm impressed, more than anything. That it was you, I mean. Although, I guess I should've guessed considering what happened. Cassie thought it was Evans but neither of us suspected you." He cracked a broad grin. "Course, you're a Marauder so I don't know why I thought you could be innocent."
"Speaking of not being innocent," James began, and Remus had a bad feeling. "We need to sneak into Hogsmeade tomorrow to get supplies. Confetti and stuff. Buy some firecrackers, if they're gonna be paying for them."
"We'll need material for the banner too," said Sirius.
"Ooh, and the balloons and stuff," added Peter.
All three of them gave Remus an expectant look. "Wh—what?"
"You coming in with us?" James asked, brow furrowed. "It was your idea."
He swallowed, growing rather nervous. "I d-don't know. Um, maybe… I did have plans tomorrow morning with Aegis…"
"We could go in the afternoon," James said.
Remus sighed, fingers running up and down his satchel strap. "Maybe. Um, maybe." Then a bright idea struck him. "If we sneak in for supplies we probably should wait to sneak in to listen to those screams." He knew it was on their minds, since James had mentioned it the evening before.
James opened his mouth, then shut it. "We can go in twice on the weekend."
"Sneak out, sneak back in, then sneak back out in the same day?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrows. "I dunno…"
James folded his arms. "Do you have something against going to listen to the screams of the damned?"
He faltered slightly in his step, nearly tripping over his feet. "I have something against sneaking out to Hogsmeade in the middle of the night," he said, trying not to sound panicked. Sirius was giving him a strange look that made him feel even more panicky.
"There isn't any big difference between going in during the day and in the evening," James pushed.
"What? Yes there is!" Remus stopped walking completely, very frustrated. "Sneaking out of the school is breaking a rule and being out after hours is another rule. That is doubling up on two very important school rules!"
James rubbed his chin. "You can only fill a jar so full."
Remus blinked, feeling like James completely changed the conversation. "What—I'm sorry, what does that have to do with anything?" Before James could answer, he realized what his friend was getting out. "No, that—getting into trouble isn't a jar! It's not as if you can only get into a certain amount of trouble! If we get caught sneaking out of school and get x amount of detention, it's not like we can't get even more for being out at night!"
James squinted. "Are you—"
"Yes!" Remus wheezed a little, feeling dizzy with having to listen to this stupidity. "Yes, I'm sure! Merlin! How is that—where did—I don't even know how you came to that conclusion that there's a limited amount of trouble you can get into! You can get into an infinite amount of trouble!"
James and Sirius exchanged excited looks while Peter gave a little moan. "Remy, stop giving them ideas!"
"Infinite amount of trouble, you say?" Sirius asked, rubbing his chin.
"No! I didn't mean—" He wracked his brain for a response. "No, there is a limited amount, you're right. It's called being expelled. All right? There is a limit, and it's being kicked out of school! Which I would prefer not to do, thank you very much!"
Sirius crinkled his nose up. "Yeah, I'd prefer not to be expelled either. Brains has a point."
"We're not going to get expelled for sneaking into Hogsmeade at night," James said.
"Are you… sure?" Pete asked.
"Er—not… not so much, I guess," he admitted.
"So… are we sneaking out tonight? Or tomorrow night?" Pete continued.
James's face brightened. "Tonight! We can sneak out tonight, and tomorrow sneak in—or Sunday, if that's better. Would that be acceptable?" he asked Remus.
"It—it's not… safe though," he whispered.
"Look," James said, "we'd probably only be caught in the castle and then they'd never know we left the school."
"He's got a point," Sirius said, and Peter nodded.
Remus tried not to panic, trying to figure out a logical way out of this. He could simply say no, go in without me. But he didn't want them going at all! He didn't want them hearing the sounds, possibly hearing a wolf howling. Didn't want them to know that's where he went. They already knew his big secret, they didn't need to know where he went…
"If you're not going to give us a reason..." James trailed off, raising his eyebrows. Remus said nothing. "You don't have to go. But we are going." James sounded very resolute, roughly his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
"Wait…"
He felt sick and knew it was time to give up. They all stared at him and he turned, going to a nearby bathroom, motioning for them to follow. He checked the stalls to make sure they were alone before locking the door. His hand was shaking hard when he used the locking spell, and Sirius asked if he was all right.
"No," he croaked out. "I'm not okay."
"You really this anxious over us going out at night?" Peter asked.
Remus sucked in a deep breath and leaned back against the wall, one arm around his stomach. "S'not the screams. Of the damned."
"What do you mean?" James asked, sounding a little annoyed.
Remus took in a deep breath, closing his eyes. "It's not screams," he repeated. "It's a spell."
All three of them stared at him with varying levels of surprise. "Spell?" Pete got out.
"How do you know?" James inquired, very suspicious.
Remus looked down at the floor, winding his fingers into the hem of his jumper. He mumbled incoherently, flushing hot from the confession nobody understood. He had to say it again. "It's me," he said, as loudly as he dared.
The room went utterly silent.
Remus's nose itched and he felt the familiar tears welling up. He turned away, turning his back to all of them, wrapping his arms around himself as he hunched forward. "It's where I go," he choked out. "D—Dumbledore put spells on the—the house so p-people hear screams and—and—" he broke off into a whimper, then managed, "—and howls all through the m-m-month. Ss-so when it's a—a f-full m—moon no one su-suspects." He dug his fingernails into his sleeves, wishing they were sharp enough to pierce through to his skin. "No damned souls. Just... just me. My damned body."
He felt worse with each word he got out. Him being a werewolf was his secret, but the house was more of Dumbledore's secret. It was a betrayal. Even though they'd probably figure it out sooner or later, it was still a betrayal. Another betrayal. He seemed to be getting good at those.
He felt Sirius coming closer. "The house was built for you," Sirius said simply, and Remus nodded. "That's why it's all sealed off and nobody can get in." Remus couldn't speak, so he nodded again. "I… wondered. I mean, it appearing the summer before we got here. And the way you talked made it seem like you didn't transform in or near the castle."
"How do you get all the way to Hogsmeade, though?" Peter asked.
"Secret passage," Remus mumbled. "I can't tell you where. I—I shouldn't've even told you I went to the house in Hogsmeade but—well, I figured you lot would figure it out anyway."
James cocked his head to one side. "Who are we even going to tell?"
"I—I know, I—it's—" He sniffled a little and shrugged. "You already know the biggest thing. It's probably silly for me to be so—so upset over one of the smaller ones." He explained a little about it not being his secret, really, and the others nodded, hopefully understanding.
All of them gave him hugs, promising it wasn't silly at all. That they understood his worry. They were curious about why it was in Hogsmeade of all places, and Remus said he had wondered the same. He explained everything Dumbledore told him when he had questioned the Headmaster. Then he told them how strong the protection spells are on the house, how it's impossible to get in and out aside from the secret entrance. How the sound spells were there to hide his screams and howls.
"How come he didn't just silence the house?" Peter asked.
"I think be—because he wants everyone to think it's violently haunted," Remus said, feeling weary now. "Helps keep people away. Or… tries to." He wanted to bring up the fact they had tried to get into the house one time when he was there, but they were on the verge of being late to class at this point. Besides, he wanted to end the conversation. The guilt was too powerful.
Sirius started to say something but Remus cut him off, pointing out they needed to get to class now.
"We—you aren't planning on still sneaking in though, right?" he asked as he picked his satchel up.
James snorted. "Nooo, I guess not," he drew out but gave Remus a wink and an elbow nudge. "Kinda brilliant you're there, though. Sometime you'll have to show us."
"Wh—"
But the others were leaving the bathroom before he could protest. Oh dear, he thought, reluctantly following them. By shutting down one problem it seemed he had accidentally started an entirely new one.
