The Avengers Whump & Bromance Anthology

The One Where Tony, Steve, and Clint Go Camping

Part 3

Whumptober 2020

PenPatronus

Sunlight and songbirds woke Steve up. A clock on the wall told him it was 11:00. He sat up and checked on Tony, who hadn't moved. He checked the bandages around his foot and found that the bleeding had stopped. Clint emerged from the bathroom, then, wiping his face down with a towel. He tossed the towel on the bed, and then held his hand out for Steve to take. Steve accepted the invitation. He let Barton pull him to his feet, then he hopped on his uninjured foot while Clint guided him to the bathroom. Barton waited patiently by the door and then helped Steve sit back down in the wooden chair beside Tony's bed. In silence, Clint started rummaging through the supplies in the kitchen. He found several bottles of water, and tossed two to Steve. Then he found a can opener. He opted for the cans of beans and opened three.

"I think we should wake him up," said Clint.

Steve nodded. "Yeah, I think we should." Cap folded one corner of the blankets aside and put his hand on Stark's shoulder. "Tony." Tony's eyes twitched. "Tony, wake up."

"Mm," Tony whined. He started to roll over towards the wall, but Steve kept his grip firm. "Are we home?" Stark whispered.

"Not yet."

"Wake me up when we're home."

"No, Tony, come on, you need to drink some water and eat something."

"Mm…" Stark opened one eye. He must have decided it was safe, because he opened the other one a few seconds later. "Hey, guys," he greeted. "Am I naked?"

"Think you can sit up?" Steve asked him.

Tony hadn't tried to flex his torso yet. But, he squeezed his eyes shut, and did a sit up. He did half of one, and the bullet wound in his kidney hurt so bad that a couple tears leaked out, but he got high enough for Steve to put a pillow under his back. Tony collapsed back against it and put his arm over his face. Three breathing exercises later, his arm fell to his side and he looked at his friends once more. He started to reach for a water bottle, but his strength had leaked out with half of his blood, and his left arm just refused to work. Steve opened a bottle of water, held it out to Tony and got rolled eyes in return.

"Hold still," Steve instructed. Like Tony was a baby, he put the bottle against his lips and helped him drink. Tony only took a few sips. The nausea from the concussion was still there. He didn't let Steve feed him any of the beans.

Clint got one of the first aid kits and sat on the side of the bed. Tony nodded and managed to put his hands behind his head. Clint tugged the blankets down to Tony's waist, peeled off the bandages on his side, and examined the first bullet wound. "You, uh, have another kidney, right?"

Tony didn't look down at the wound. "That bad?"

"You can't have one of my kidneys." Clint scooted the blankets back up to Tony's chin, then pulled up from the bottom to look at the bullet wound in Tony's leg. His skin was dead white and swollen. It was still leaking a little blood. "Geeze, Tony."

Steve strained to look at the injury. "We have to get him to a hospital, soon."

Clint nodded vigorously. "You can't have one of my legs, either, Stark."

"Bite me, Barton," Tony said tiredly, smiling.

Footsteps outside. The three Avengers sat up straight, resembling anxious meercats. Steve communicated with Barton with quick hand signals. Clint got the two shotguns and the pair of them took a protective position in front of Tony, and aimed at the door.

It opened.

An old man half as tall as Steve yelped and put his hands up, surrendering. "What the hell are you doing in my cabin?" he demanded.

"Ah, son of a gun." Steve nodded at Clint, and they both lowered their guns. "Sorry, Sir, but we need some help here."

The man didn't put his hands down. "Are you Captain America?" he asked. When Steve didn't deny it, the man saluted. "Is that Tony Stark behind you? And you're…" He squinted at Clint. "You're the arrow guy…"

Clint harumphed. Tony chuckled.

"Sir, I'm sorry we broke in, but we're all hurt. Do you have mobile telephone?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, yeah, of course." The man reached into the pocket of his fishing vest and tossed an iPhone over to Cap. Steve excused himself from the room and limped outside to call for help. The man approached Tony. He wiped his hand on his dirty jeans, then held it out for Tony to shake. Tony summoned his strength and obliged. "Sir, I have to say, what you did in New York… We owe you a debt, Sir."

Tony gestured at Clint. "Thank arrow guy, too. He took out, like, three aliens."

Clint raised both middle fingers.

Steve returned. "All right, they're sending a helicopter for us – said they'll hover overhead and send down a stretcher for Tony, first. Sound good, Stark?" Steve handed the phone back to the old man. "Tony?"

At the silence, the three men whirled around and looked at the bed.

Tony's eyes were closed. Somehow, his face had paled a shade lighter.

"Hey." Steve hurried over and knelt in front of the bed. "Tony."

Clint joined him. He shook Tony's outstretched arm. "Stark. Stark!"

Steve put the back of his hand against Tony's nose and slightly parted mouth. "Oh, no."

Clint put his hands in his hair and pulled. "He was fine two seconds ago! What if the last thing he saw was me flicking him off?"

"He's not breathing." Steve pushed his fingers against the pulse point in Tony's neck. His skin paled as light as Tony's. "No heart beat."

"Switch with me!" Clint exclaimed. He and Steve switched, Steve at Tony's chest and Clint at Tony's head. "Do compressions when I say!"

"You idjits!" the old man shouted. "Put him on the floor! You don't do CPR on a soft surface! You'll just break his ribs, not pump his heart!"

Quick – quick as possible – Steve threw Tony's blankets off his naked body and gently lowered him to the wood floor. Clint dove in and started blowing into Stark's windpipe. Two sets of breaths and compressions later, he checked Tony's heartbeat. Nothing. "Again!" Steve ordered. They tried again. They tried again, and again. Nothing.

"Out of the way, Captain Idjit! Let an old boy scout in." The old man slammed his shoulder into Steve's. Steve almost lost it, then, but then he saw that the man had an AED – an Automated External Defibrillator. Steve pulled Clint aside as he stepped out of the man's way. The man opened the device and turned it on. With practiced hands he unwrapped the wires and placed the pads on Tony's chest. "Clear!" The man hit a button, and a jolt of electricity ricocheted through Tony.

Steve and Clint stood aside, clutching each other's arms. Watching. Waiting. Wondering. Trying not to panic, but very much on the verge.

An entire three minutes had gone by before Tony's eyes flew open. He shuddered and coughed and clawed at his beating heart. The old man stepped away and Clint and Steve rushed to Tony's side. "You're ok," a breathless Steve assured him, all but hugging Tony. "You're ok, you're ok." He looked up at the man. "Thank you. Can't thank you enough." The man saluted again.

Tony's coughs started to subside. He reached out for both of his teammates' hands and grasped them so hard that Clint almost pulled away, in pain. "Can… we…" Tony gasped, "go… home… now…?"

In the distance, a helicopter approached.

The End