See first chapter for disclaimers.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! This contains spoilers for the anime Assassination Classroom. You've been warned.
AUTHOR'S NOTE 2: Thanks to Storyseeker for beta-reading this. As usual, if you have any comments or preferences, please don't be shy. RandR.
PREVIOUSLY: Rising of the Shield Hero
Educational Experience
They stepped out of the portal into a darkened hallway. "Wow, that was a long one," Faith muttered as they looked around, examining their surroundings for potential threats. "I was starting to think we were stuck there."
"There was a lot to do." Xander nodded. "Not entirely sure what'll come of that, but it's gotta be better than the mess we walked into. Scheming priests, psychotic royalty..." He shook his head. "Talk about fighting in a burning house."
"So, where are we now?" Faith looked around the darkened hallway of what appeared to be an upscale hotel or apartment building. There was no one around, which was probably for the best.
Xander shrugged, having no better idea. "Let's look around, and try to find some clothes." They were wearing their armor and clothes suitable for the middle ages. They came across an employee only area that had uniforms for waitstaff and maids. They appropriated a room service cart for their gear, as they discovered that the magic bags-of-holding they had picked up at an earlier stop didn't work. They had found some time ago that this was not unusual on worlds without magic, but they had also learned that the contents would become accessible as soon as they moved to a world with magic.
With their gear stashed out of sight, they began to make their way through the halls, doing their best to look like they belonged while looking for an elevator or some indication of why they were there. The place was definitely a hotel; upscale, with state-of-the-art security that went well beyond paranoid.
It was quiet, with no noise of the outer world intruding or muzak in the halls. So, the sound of breaking glass and the subdued voices were as good as a brass band for drawing attention. They carefully followed the noise to a vantage point at the mouth of a service corridor leading to a wide hallway with floor-to-ceiling glass on one side. There, they saw a group of kids, looking for all the world like a middle-school class on a field trip, watching one of their classmates fight a grown man.
The redheaded boy seemed to be holding his own, but the commentary from somewhere amidst the group of watching children was a little bizarre. The voice was actually lecturing, as if they were in a classroom. That thought brought Xander up short. He blinked slowly and carefully considered what he was seeing. This is familiar.
When the class moved on, leaving the man bound hand and foot with some very feminine makeup applied and wasabi packets shoved up his nose, the two demon hunters came out and looked him over.
"That was cruel." Faith grinned. "Kid has style." She glanced at Xander when he stopped her from helping him.
"He's a professional killer that likes to use his bare hands. Let's not let him loose." They retrieved the cart and moved on while the suffering man glared at them. When they had moved a safe distance away to talk, Xander said softly. "I know where we are."
"Yeah?" They managed to follow the kids, discretely, moving through service corridors as necessary, while he filled her in.
"There was this anime, see. It was a really weird one, but I kind of liked it." He described the plot and covered some of the highpoints, ranging from the teacher's introduction to his long-delayed origin story. Then he told her about the episodes surrounding the kids' summer vacation and the current situation at the hotel.
When the explanation was done, Faith shook her head, not sure how to feel about what she had just been told. "You realize how nuts that sounds, right?"
"Made for a decent anime," he said, shrugging as they listened at the door to a small theatre, close to the top floor of the luxury hotel. The sound of gunfire was just audible through the soundproofing. If all went as it had in the anime, they'd be fine, and neither of them was really equipped to deal with a gun-toting assassin, regardless. "You're right, though. A reality where something like that happens makes no sense."
Frowning in thought, Faith ventured. "Isn't that kinda true about a lot of the worlds we visit? I don't just mean magic and weird biology and crap. I mean the way people act on some of these worlds is just… off."
Xander considered that for a moment, then shrugged. "I suppose. Doesn't change the fact that we have to get through them." He glanced at her. "Don't get me wrong. I agree that we've seen some really strange reactions from people and just plain insane behavior accepted as normal. It's just that I don't see how knowing it really changes our basic situation."
"It doesn't," Faith agreed. "Still, its something to think about." She cocked her head and listened. "It's over. They're moving on." They waited a minute before opening the door carefully and walking in. Another assassin was lying, bound and gagged, on the floor. Faith eyed the restraints with a professional eye. "Those kids really know their knots."
The man, who was beginning to come around, eyed them nervously.
"Don't worry," Xander told him. "We're not here for you." They moved on, abandoning the cart and making bundles of their armor and weapons, much to the man's obvious confusion.
They reached the penthouse, and followed as the mastermind behind the kids' current problem led them up to a helipad on the roof. Faith wanted to intervene, especially when the man started beating on the blue-haired kid. Xander assured her that it wasn't necessary.
A moment later, the man that had been beating the daylights out of the kid was facedown in a puddle of his own making. Faith blinked. Then she blinked again.
"What the hell was that?"
"Something that probably wouldn't work anywhere else," Xander told her. "It makes for a good finishing move for an anime, but there's no way that would do more than annoy a vamp or demon back home or even a regular guy."
The group soon had things mopped up, and Xander decided it was time to step in. When abandoning the cart, he had pulled out two wallets they had picked up somewhere along the way. "Here. We'll need these."
"The psychic paper? Who we gonna be?"
Xander smirked.
OOOOOOOOOO
"Actually, Kurasuma-san, we'll be taking it from here." Xander stepped forward confidently, and raised the wallet, just as he'd seen done on TV. The reaction wasn't all Xander could have hoped for.
"CIA?" The man stared, incredulous. "You're way outside your jurisdiction."
"Given the nature of the threat," Xander countered, "the entire planet is our jurisdiction. Just as it is yours."
The man considered that and then nodded. "Point. But that doesn't mean we're handing the target over to you."
"We have a method of disposal that we know will work. Can you say the same?"
"If it goes the way we think, you'll be able to watch." Faith added. "Report to your superiors that the job's done and the threat is gone."
"Tell me what you have in mind, first."
"You'll see soon enough. We just need to wait a bit. In the meantime, I should congratulate you all. The bounty will go to the kids. This wouldn't be possible without them, and the money is meaningless to us. If this works, you won't be seeing any of us again."
"What's that mean?" The largest boy in the class demanded. "This some kinda sacrifice play?"
"Not exactly." Xander shook his head. "We won't die, we just won't be back."
"I'm intrigued," the target offered from his place in the blue-haired boy's hands. "What do you have in mind?"
"Well," Xander said, "we plan on… not telling you, just in case you have another ace up your nonexistent sleeve."
Several of the class snickered.
"Quite understandable," the target allowed. "In case you succeed, I'd like to say a few words to my students."
"I actually think you've said enough," Xander cut him off. "We know who you were before that crackpot got ahold of you and started experimenting. You aren't what I'd call a role model. Look how your last student turned out."
"Oh." He fell silent, contemplating past mistakes.
"By the way, Kurasuma, the lunatic that started this whole mess is still running free and experimenting on people with the same technology that created him." Xander gestured to the target. "He's outside our jurisdiction, but it'll be on your heads if he produces another global threat." He met the older man's eyes unflinching. "Please believe me when I say, making monsters, whether its literal or in human skin, like the new Reaper, is never a good idea. I strongly suggest you clean house, before an outside power does it for you."
"I don't respond well to threats," the man gritted out.
"It's not a threat, just friendly advice. No plans are in the works, but look at the history of your own organization."
"I can't comment on that," the man said after a brief hesitation.
"Seriously." Xander said. "Shut. Him. Down."
"I find myself in full agreement with our American friends," the target-that-was-currently-a-paperweight said.
"It was the man currently calling himself Shiro that blew up the moon with his idiotic experiment, not this guy." Xander revealed. "That alone should be enough to toss him in a cage and weld it shut." He turned to the class. "As for the rest of you." He paused. "Go home. Find a normal teacher. Try to forget what you've learned this year."
"EXCUSE ME!?" The paperweight cried in outrage.
"Do you really want a group of middle-schoolers to take up assassination as a profession?" Faith broke in angrily. "Killing people stains you. You want that for them? Look at the role models they've had over the last few months. Spooks and trained killers. You can't think this is healthy for them."
"They learn more than that in my class!"
"Everything has been geared toward that goal, though." Xander supplied. "History of assassination? Chemistry of poisons? Math of trajectories, ranges, and explosive yields?"
The kids looked at each other and then at their teacher. "He's got a point," one ventured.
"Why don't you ask your language arts teacher what kind of mentor the Russian is?" Xander suggested, addressing the blue-haired boy. "I think she'll discourage you."
"I'm sure she would," Kurasuma agreed. Then, he stopped and stared. "What the hell is that?"
Everyone turned to stare at the hole in the air that had appeared.
"Our method," Xander answered. "Faith, could you grab the packs?" He turned to the boy holding the global threat. "If you would?"
"What is that?" he asked, not moving to relinquish his teacher.
"It's a portal to another world. An empty one no one has any use for."
"N-now wait a minute!" The threat was starting to sound panicked.
"You want to stay where you're a threat to the planet and these kids have no choice but to take a life?" Faith asked, returning with the packs.
"Er, well, no. But-"
"How many people have you killed as the Reaper?" Xander asked. Kurasuma frowned at that, and Xander wondered if he'd known. He then recalled something he'd heard Naofumi say. "You've killed lots of people. Just consider this your turn and give into it." He held out his hand.
"He's right, Nagisa." The target sounded resigned. "Give me to him."
Reluctantly, the boy handed over his teacher.
"I'm sorry you all had to go through this. Now, you can get back to your normal lives, and try to find some decent role models."
He and Faith walked through the portal into what seemed an endless desert. "This looks promising."
"For you, maybe," the paperweight groused as the portal closed behind them.
"Don't fish for sympathy," Xander advised. "Mine is with the families of your victims…Reaper."
The paperweight sighed, knowing it was pointless. Another portal opened a moment later, and Xander set the feared assassin on the ground before walking through it without looking back.
