Stewie and them were danubing their way through the snow when they came upon a group of four wights! And the wights had the faces of Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Cartman!
"Oh no!" Mabel yelled. "Zombies!"
"They're not zombies," said Dipper. "They're called wights. I read about them in my book."
"Well, whatever they are, they're gonna kill us!" Mabel shouted.
In Hodor's arms, Stewie pointed at the Cartman-wight. "That one looks like an evil version of my father." Cartman growled. Being compared to Peter Griffin seemed to make him angry, even though of course there was no way he could have understood what Stewie had said.
Dipper was flipping frantically through the journal. "Here it is! It says you can defeat wights by singing in three-part harmony!"
"What luck," said Stewie. "There's three of us. Well, actually four, but Hodor probably can't sing."
"What song do you wanna sing?" said Mabel. "How about 'The Bear and the Maiden Fair?'"
"Ooh, I'm not sure if I know all the words to that one," said Stewie. But the twins had already launched into the song and he had no choice but to join them. He couldn't remember all the words, so he sang:
"A bear there was, a bear, a bear,
Blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah-blah-blah-blah.
Standing here with these kids,
Waiting for this song to end.
Yankee Doodle went to town,
The bear, the bear, the maiden fair!"
But he still sang the right notes for the harmony, so it didn't matter. After a few bars the wights' heads all exploded!
Mabel proudly surveyed the results of their work. "I love that song," she said.
"You do know it's actually about a rape, right?" said Stewie.
"That was neatly done!" said a new voice. They all turned. A girl was standing there, her skin dappled like a does beneath a cloak of leaves. Her eyes were large and liquid, gold and green, slitted like a cat's eyes. Her hair was a tangle of brown and red and gold, autumn colors, with vines and twigs and withered flowers woven through it. "You're just lucky there weren't any White Walkers around," she said. "That trick doesn't work on them."
"Who are you?" Stewie asked.
Dipper knew. "She's a child. A child of the forest!"
Mabel's eyes lit up. "So, you are real!"
"I'm no child," the little woman said. "I'm over two hundred years old. I've been waiting for you, Stewie Griffin."
"Why have you been waiting?" Stewie asked.
"Well, to be more accurate, someone else has."
"The three eyed raven," said Stewie.
"The greenseer." And with that she was off, and Stewie and them had no choice but to follow.
They hadn't gone very far when they came to the place in Stewie's dream. A cave in the side of a hill, beneath a heart tree.
"Come on in," said the girl.
"Are you sure it's safe in there?" Dipper said nervously.
She smiled. "Oh, yes. The wights can't come in here."
"That's not what I meant," said Dipper.
"Come on, Dipper, I'm sure it'll be fine," said Stewie. "This is the place I dreamed of. This is where the raven is waiting for me."
The cave was overgrown with white weirwood roots from the massive tree above. Hodor had to duck his head. As they went through the tunnel, other children of the forest peeked out around corners. Finally, they arrived at a large central chamber, where the roots grew all the way down to the ground. In the middle of the floor, surrounded by roots, was a boy who looked only a few years older than Dipper and Mabel. He had a crown on his head and sat in a wheelchair. The roots had grown around and even through most of his body. He didn't look like a raven, but Stewie instinctively knew this was the person he was meant to meet.
When he saw Stewie, the boy smiled. "I knew you would come to me."
"Are you the three eyed raven?" Stewie asked.
"For now," the boy said. Stewie didn't understand what that meant.
"Why are you wearing a crown?" Mabel asked. "Are you a king?"
He smiled sadly. "Once. Once, in another reality. Back when my name was… Bran Stark."
