Episode 49 - Epilogue III: Where'd everybody go from there?

For one particular sushi bar in downtown Tokyo-3, it and the staff who ran it were dubbed 'lucky', 'persistent', 'survivors'. No matter how bad the Angel attack, this was one spot that, for some reason or another, remained relatively unscathed throughout the whole Angel War. The customers always came back, usually NERV personnel looking for a decent meal amidst all the uncertainty and relative chaos that came with their line of work. Now that the battles were done and over with, those who ran the sushi bar were wondering just what their customer flow would be like going forward.

Keiko Kamina, the early-middle-aged owner of the place, was pondering just that in her small office when she heard a knock on the door.

"Come in," she said.

The door opened, and in walked Rika, a young woman who acted as the bar's hostess.

"Ma'am?" she began. "I think you'll want to come out here. We could really use your input..."

A curious eyebrow raised, Keiko got up from her desk and followed Rika out into the sushi bar proper, and when they reached the front, her eyes widened with surprise at the crowd that had gathered, some of which overflowed to the outside. She recognized a number of them as being NERV staff, including those in command positions. Some of the faces were a bit new, and then...there was Freakazoid, Freakazette, and their unusually-garbed crowd. Further adding to the strangeness of it all was the presence of a penguin (held in the arms of Major Katsuragi, whom Keiko knew as a quasi-regular), a black kitten (held in the arms of the blue-haired girl in the group), an odd sheepdog-like creature, and three enormous snakes. Not to mention the odd-looking humanoid that resembled a man-sized version of NERV's Evangelions, accompanied by a pale-haired hippie woman.

Freakazoid stepped forward towards Keiko and Rika, an eager smile on his face. "Got any open tables?" he asked.

Keiko and Rika gave each other a look before facing the crowd. It was then Keiko cleared her throat.

"*Ahem* Certainly," she answered. "Before we seat you, just so we're clear-are you all together, or is it separate checks?"

Minutes later...

The entire party was now sitting down at a series of tables that had been pushed together, chowing down on their orders or chatting amongst themselves. (The pets had been placed in a separate area dubbed the 'Pets Table', where they were contentedly eating some specially-prepared goodies.) Some highlights of the chatter included the following...

-X-

Shigeru: "So I heard you're looking to make it as a country singer."

Longhorn: "Got that right."

Shigeru: "One of the guys in my band's an engineer over at a music label in Tokyo-2, maybe I can set up a meet for you. I remember him telling me they're looking to expand into some untapped niches, so they might be interested."

Longhorn: "Well, twist my tumbleweeds in the wind, consider me interested, pard!"

-X-

Huntsman: "So, your folks tell me you're quite the environmentalist."

Boa-Magnon: "Quite indeed. Soldier of Fortune Weekly named me 'Most Environmentally-Conscious Mercenary' three years in a row."

Huntsman: "We could always use someone like you over at the Department of the Interior. We're doing our darndest to protect a number of species on the edge, and it may just be up your alley."

Boa-Magnon: "Intriguing. Tell me more..."

-X-

Cobra Queen: "Issss that sssso?"

Fuyutsuki [nodding]: "Very much so. The lanterns made in my hometown are considered a signature attraction, quite popular with the tourists."

Cobra Queen: "Hmmm, Royce and I will have to pay it a vissssit while we're here. I ssssee the makingssss of a new exhibit already forming..."

-X-

Asuka: "Say, Dr. Ikari?"

Yui: "Oh, it's quite all right, Asuka. Call me Yui."

Asuka: "Sure. Anyway, something I gotta know, figuring you're technically her mother..."

They both looked over at Rei, who was laughing at a joke Mari was telling her.

Asuka: "Rei gets this crush on Freakazoid for a while, and now she and Mari are an item. The only thing in common is that both of them are a little..."

Yui: "Off-kilter?"

Asuka: "Yeah, when you put it like that."

Yui [smiling a bit]: "I think I know what you're trying to ask. To tell you the truth, I think it's because all the women of my family tend to be drawn to the quirky type. In fact, before I even met Shinji's father, for a while in high school I actually had a crush on the boy who was the self-described class clown."

Shinji [eyes widening slightly with surprise]: "Really? Begs the question, how'd you go from liking him to liking, well, Father?"

Yui [sighing a bit]: "Unfortunately, we Ikari women aren't too discriminating when it came to either the good or bad side of quirky. Thankfully, Rei seems to have landed a good catch." [Looks over at Rei and Mari again.] "It's funny, Mari sort of reminds me of this girl I knew back in my senior year at Kyoto U..."

-X-

Kusagabe: "There's still something I don't get."

Kensuke [curious]: "What's that, Kusagabe?"

Kusagabe: "Gutierrez's motives I get. Same with Gendo Ikari's. But how come SEELE wanted to end the world in the first place?"

Mayumi: "Good question."

Freakazoid [standing up as a spotlight fell on him]: "The answer's pretty simple, if you think about it. The men who made up the SEELE council were a bunch of old, rich guys who pretty much had it all."

Freakazette [a spotlight also on her]: "Money, power, influence, some degree of fame-they were all basically at the top the world. And like many cruel, old, rich dudes throughout history, when someone told them 'you can't take it with you', of course they got the wrong message."

Freakazoid [continuing the speechifying]: "They lost their appreciation for the little things in life, so they began to seek out the one thing any greed-filled man would crave in their zeal: immortality."

Freakazette [looking towards the camera]: "But they shouldn't have-they could've learned to appreciate the wonderful variety life has to offer...A good example of which can be found at your local Anubis Market!"

Mayumi [looking towards us with a smile]: "Where customers have access to a wide variety of great foods, curated by a staff specializing in a high-quality level of customer service!"

Shinji [chiming in]: "That's right-all while able to individually choose from an assortment of low prices, without any fear of ridicule or embarrassment!"

Fuyutsuki [giving his two cents]: "It does my heart good to know that Anubis Markets are a division of Osiris Foods."

All [looking towards the camera]:

"Food so good, you can eat it!"

The camera then closed in on Freakazoid and Freakazette.

Freakazoid [shrugging]: "Whaddya expect?"

Freakazette: "They helped us get the rest of the story finished."

Both winked as the shot then 'irised out'.

-And now, Joe the Announcer will take it from here...-

Announcer: "And so, peace returned to Tokyo-3, if not the entire planet Earth, our heroes having won the day, now free to go about their lives, wherever they progressed...While those who threatened to doom the world in the first place received their proper punishment..."

"NERV was eventually decommissioned in the first quarter of the following year of 2016, the staff moving on to new chapters in their lives."

"The SEELE council, with Lorenz Kihl among them, were given life in prison, to no one's surprise. Investigations the world over led to the reorganization of the U.N. in order to prevent such a pervasive level of corruption and influence from ever taking root again."

"Gendo Ikari got slightly less than the SEELE council, even with the additional charges of providing hazardous materials to a known felon. One day, he was paid a visit in prison by Yui, Shinji, and Rei. It was there that Yui gave him another disappointment when she handed him both a set of divorce papers, and her wedding ring."

"Armando Gutierrez was given even slightly less than Gendo Ikari, as he was merely charged with and convicted of conspiracy and attempted world domination."

"The Lobe and his Legion didn't finish their prison stay, as they soon managed to escape and make their way out into the world again, proving that one can't simply keep a good supervillain down for very long. Thankfully, there are still superheroes in the world, we'll be fine for the most part, so try not to complain too much."

"Cave Guy and Cobra Queen toured Japan, taking in the sights and adding more to the latter's Japanese lantern collection. Together, they collaborated on a museum exhibition that explored and examined the history and artistry of the paper lantern, which drew rave reviews on its opening day."

"When NERV was dissolved and all the branches the world over were shut down, Toby Danger retired his commission and opened a private investigation firm, living up to his name as he goes after the most dangerous (and quite mean-spirited) criminals out there."

"Sgt. Mikio Kusagabe was given a number of commendations for his efforts in preventing both the domination and end of the world, and would be eventually promoted to commissioner of Tokyo-3's police department. Somewhere in-between, at a cross-continental meeting between Washington D.C. and its 'sister city', Kusagabe would be introduced by Freakazoid to Cosgrove. The two of them hit it off immediately."

"Accepting the Huntsman's invitation, and with his personal recommendation, Boa-Magnon left the mercenary life behind and became deputized by the U.S. Department of the Interior. She and her snake Ja-Burr now travel the country, protecting various endangered species from being poached or otherwise tormented by certain varieties of lowlife scum."

"Lord Bravery returned to part-time superheroing while continuing to run his shoppe with his family, eventually training his son Reggie to assume his mantle."

"The Lawn Gnomes, for their part in preventing two schemes of global devastation, had the curse originally put upon them lifted...partly. Though they still turn to stone during the day, it's now only on the weekends."

"Vorn the Unspeakable, after settling the debt with the oni he knew, took Waylon Jeepers back with him to America, where he immediately put the would-be-wizard to work as the new trainee in the store. And don't worry, he's made sure Jeepers is greatly limited in his ability to cause any form of magical mischief...except for the case of the occasional unruly customer."

"Longhorn got his shot at recording an album at last, thanks to the meeting Shigeru Aoba set up with him. Shigeru himself wound up playing backing guitar during the album's recording. The album became a success, leading to newfound celebrity for Longhorn, including his appearing in a number of Japanese commercials."

"Bo-Ron managed to return to his homeworld, bringing back with him the captured Nerdator II and his ship. On his occasional visits to Earth, he sometimes acts as a spokesperson for Sprint, thanks to some clout from former spokeswoman (and one-time flame) Candice Bergen."

"Fan Boy's startup became more of a success, after they expanded their services to include cyber-security."

"Dexter Douglas would be invited by Roddy to head up a newly-opened branch of Roddy's company in Nevada, an opportunity he eagerly accepted. Steff continued teaching at the local high school, while Ashley would follow a combination of her parents' footsteps, becoming a teacher of computer sciences. On the side, she started a computer science-themed podcast with three of her fellow college students, one David Zumwalt and the twins Patrick and Erin Forrestal."

"Adam and Lilith, before setting out on a renewed journey across the universe (Leiliel in tow), performed one final act of reparation by using their power to return the Earth to its proper axis, as well as cleaning up some of the ecological damage wrought upon the world by Second Impact-especially in Antarctica, which soon saw a return of many of its indigenous animal species...along with a plethora of Discovery Channel and National Geographic film and TV crews."

"Kaworu Nagisa, aka Tabris, was paid a visit by Adam and Lilith before they left, where he expressed a desire to stay on Earth to better understand its people. Eventually, following his college education, he became a music and television critic for The A.V. Club, where his rather unique form of insight proved to be a breath of fresh air for those reading the reviews on that particular website."

"The Rei clones, now a group of autonomous, semi-identical individuals, formed their own professional call center service, hiring themselves out to many a Fortune 500 company."

"Kozo Fuyutsuki spent the next couple of years in a return to academia, teaching at Kyoto U. until he formally retired. He takes comfort in the visits from friends and colleagues he receives from time to time."

"After dating for a couple of years, Roddy MacStew and Naoko Akagi tied the knot, the venue being a floating ceremony in the middle of Loch Ness, officiated by Nessie herself. For some of the male guests on Naoko's side, it would be the first time they'd be wearing a proper kilt, an experience they secretly weren't eager to repeat anytime soon."

"Makoto Hyuga and Satsuki Ooi graduated from computer dating to real-life dating when they moved in together, after the latter had returned to Tokyo-3 with her fellow former NERV-2 coworkers. From there, the two began a new career in anime TV writing, penning episodes for a number of popular shows."

"Shigeru Aoba took up a career as a studio musician, eventually working his way up to him and his band landing a record deal of their own, and from there leading to their musical success."

"Yui Ikari and Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu partnered together to found a new scientific think-tank, recruiting Ritsuko Akagi, Maya Ibuki, Hitomi Kaga, Aoi Mogami, and Kaede Agano to fill out the leadership of the group. They would go on to research both medical and alternative energy innovations."

"Speaking of Ritsuko and Maya, wedding bells rang for the two of them a year after Naoko's nuptials. The two were among the standouts of Yui and Kyoko's think-tank, with the happy couple even making the cover of Wired twice. Currently, they're looking at starting a family, if only to head off Naoko badgering them about grandkids."

"A photo of Pen-Pen the penguin and Kablooie the kitten wound up becoming quite popular on the internet as the latest in a long line of cross-species companionship cuteness, leading to a number of merchandising deals for the two. Luckily, neither they nor their respective owners ever fell prey to the temptations of online fame."

"Misato Katsuragi and Ryoji Kaji wound up getting married themselves a little while after Rits and Maya; they later had a daughter named Mikoto. Misato became a professional military consultant for film and TV productions, while Ryoji went from spy to spy novelist, the critical acclaim his books received leading to him being dubbed the 'Japanese John Le Carre'."

"Toji Suzuhara and Hikari Horaki stayed together all throughout their school years, eventually being wed after graduating college. Hikari went into teaching, while Toji became a professional athlete, even making Japan's Olympic basketball team. At one point, while both were college freshmen, Toji finally convinced Hikari to watch Animal House with him; given how long he knew her, it took him by great surprise when she laughed quite hard through most of the movie."

"Wedding bells eventually rang for Shinji Ikari and Asuka Langley Sohryu as well, and each of them landed their dream jobs. For Asuka, she, along with Marie Vincennes and Mana Kirishima, became a triple-threat team of game developers for Nintendo, creating a number of fun and innovative games based around new and classic franchises. Shinji, on the other hand, combined his two passions following his win on The Next Food Network Star, hosting the show 'Kitchen Koncerto', in which he crafted recipes based around famous pieces of classical music. Shinji and Asuka later had twins, a boy named Yuji and a girl named Erika."

[Suggested music: "We'll Meet Again", specifically from the Freakazoid! finale "Normadeus".]

"Rei Ayanami-or rather now, Rei Ikari-and Mari Makinami, still together and very much in love (and still with Kablooie, who lived a very, very long life for a cat), both headed west for their college careers, in of all places New Jersey. Mari graduated from Princeton with a degree in communications, while Rei graduated from the Kubert School with a degree in commercial illustration. Mari went into comedy writing, eventually succeeding John Oliver as the host of Last Week Tonight. Rei, on the other hand, achieved her dream and became the newest artistic talent to join MAD Magazine, where she pioneered a new feature known as the 'Mad Manga Mash-Up', which parodies famous and well-known manga and anime series. Some of her hit spoofs include the likes of the accounting-based action thriller 'A Tax on Titan'; the spiritual-themed bowling saga 'Shaman Kingpin'; and the safety obsession-skewering farce 'Great Preventer'."

"Kensuke Aida and Mayumi Yamagishi kept their relationship going, pooling their respective knacks for photography and reading as one of Japan's youngest documentary filmmaking teams, with their first big production being an examination of the Angel War, taking influence from the work of Ken Burns. (And yes, eventually the two of them got hitched. Don't think I forgot that particular detail.)"

"As for Freakazoid and Freakazette? The two of them returned to the States, though they left the Japan Freakalair (and the Freakazord) available on the occasions their crime-fighting took them to the land of the rising sun. And I promise, this is the last time I say this particular detail in this 'where are they now' segment, the two of them tied the knot themselves. Overall, life kept on being good for the two of them...Or rather, the soon-to-be three of them."

"THE END."

**Author's Note(s)**

At last, we're finally here! Hope this story has been a fun ride for all of you as much as it was a challenge for me.

The whole setup with the sushi bar leads to a riff on the closing moments of the season two Freakazoid! episode "Mission: Freakazoid".

Bo-Ron's Sprint connection was a gag from "Next Time, Phone Ahead", where a number of mobile phone providers go to war over who he'll sign up with. The actress Candice Bergen was Sprint's spokesperson for some time.

Ashley's podcast co-hosts are another wink and a nod to SPDudley's "Blue Rose" EVA stories, as they're three of the original characters he created for his spin on the EVA story. I've become a recent fan, as you can tell.

Yui's observation about Mari is a nod to the 'Extra Stage' bonus story from the final volume of the Neon Genesis Evangelion manga, which showed Mari as a classmate of Yui's.

Misato's new career is inspired by the career Lt. Falcon took up in the years following the G.I. Joe team's disbandment, as depicted in the Devil's Due run of the G.I. Joe comic book. Kaji's new career is a nod to the late legendary novelist John Le Carre, who passed away last month.

For the next few days: well, I gotta roll the credits, don't I?