Answering reviews:
Lunarwriter: I do know that song and it is really good haha. Have you seen the edit on YT of it with HTTYD clips? It's pretty awesome :)
Whiskerface: like, good horrible or actually horrible? Lol
Godspeed: I hope this one answers that question. And yeah it's a heck of a lot longer than I was expecting too... I thought I'd get to the movie by ch 20... but I've written to 60 now and we should be at the movie by no later than 61 :)
Entry 55
Things have steadily gotten worse over the past couple weeks.
My dad held another meeting, and explained that if we're going to make it through the rest of winter, everyone needs to do all they can to help out. Searching the woods for edible plants (and any animals not hibernating), making sure to conserve all resources (even non food items) and continuing to fight off any stray dragon that passes by.
Of course, when he said "everyone" he really meant "everyone except Hiccup". I'm not allowed to leave the house unless it's to the forge. And even there, Gobber has been told not to leave me alone.
My dad said that if I hadn't distracted everybody with that stupid invention, the dragons wouldn't have snuck in and taken the livestock. Honestly, I don't know if I entirely believe that, simply because the sheer multitude of dragons that night would have been hard to fight off anyway, but I certainly know I didn't help any. So, I still feel incredibly guilty. For real, though, how did my dad even KNOW that bola was mine? Was it the way I looked at him after? Did Gobber say something? He knew I had a "project", but I never told him what it was. Somehow, I feel like my dad just KNEW…
By the time the meeting was over, it was dark out. The rest of the Vikings grumbled home, and I tried to ignore the comments I heard as Dad escorted me back to our house.
"Darn boy… ruining everything…"
"Should never be left alone…"
"Better off without…"
I just stared at my feet all the way back.
That's another thing I don't understand. How did EVERYONE know it was my fault? My dad never explicitly said I did anything, even though we both know I did. I suppose I did run away for a bit, but still, they have no proof. It makes me wonder… are they all blaming me just because?
I guess I shouldn't be surprised. It's easier just to blame the human mistake than to take any responsibility yourself. Heck, I'd probably blame me too if I was in their shoes. It makes things a whole lot simpler, anyway.
We got back home, and Dad told me to go straight to bed. I did, but I couldn't sleep. Now, it's been hours since the glow of the fire downstairs faded away, and I'm still wide awake. Maybe a little fresh air would be nice…
It's cold out still, and the ground, despite having a layer of snow covering it, feels a lot more like ice. But somehow, it's almost… peaceful. I pull my winter jacket tighter, looking up at the sky. This time of year, the Bïfrost Bridge is almost always visible at some point in the night, and I can see it pretty clearly right now. I wonder if Mom is watching me… if she is, she's probably just as disappointed as Dad. I wish I could do more to be the son he deserves. He didn't deserve to be given such a useless, pathetic screw up; and no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to change.
How did my mother ever see anything in me? Why would she throw her life away for mine? I surely can't see anything worth caring about…
As I'm here, pondering these questions, for just a brief moment, the colors of the Bridge are blotted out. A silhouette, complete with two broad wings and a long tail tipped by tailfins, flies overhead for just a second. It's so fast, yet I know I saw it. And, as the very dragon who started this disaster passes by, so silently, so unassuming, so… IGNORANT of all the trouble it's caused… I can't help but feel wronged. If that stupid flying lizard had just stayed in the shadows, I never would have built that contraption. And, even if I was still the village hiccup, at least I wouldn't be utterly despised as I am now.
A sense of rage builds within me, and in anger, I take a chip from the stone steps and throw it in the dragon's direction, cursing everything about it. And for just a moment, I swear I see it come back.
Until next time…
-H
