Miraculous Ladybug!AU
"How do you accidentally end up married to a supervillain?" James demanded. "It's not that hard to not marry them."
"Well, when you've been accidentally hit by an akuma who marries people off, it's rather difficult to resist," Remus retorted. "Unfortunately, despite my cleansing power, the marriages are completely legal and binding."
"But what I don't understand is how you married a supervillain, when there were tons of strangers around you!"
"You saw what happened — Silverdog thought his akuma wasn't doing well enough, so he joined the fight — and we were both hit at the same time. He then performed a legal, binding ceremony and made us both sign marriage licenses."
James fell back on the bed, his hand draped over his eyes in a dramatic fashion. "This is a disaster."
"You tell me." Remus snorted. "I can't believe I married a supervillain. I can't believe I married my archnemesis, the man I'm supposed to be hunting down."
"It'll make it easier to catch him, though, right?" James suggested hopefully.
Remus shook his head. "Nah. He's fled back to whatever slimy hole he crawled out of. I'll just have to wait until the next akuma and lure him out."
"Good luck," James said grimly. "Something tells me that Silverdog is not going to fall for it so easily, especially after today's fiasco."
"But he'll have to come out at some point," Remus pointed out, "especially if he doesn't want to stay married to me."
"True," James agreed. "We'll just have to wait and see."
Remus bolted up in his bed, astonished at his sudden realization. Silverdog's identity was within reach — under the akuma's spell he would've signed his legal name on the license, not his supervillain name. Unfortunately, that would mean that Remus would've signed it with his legal name too.
Where had the mayor kept the marriage license?
James. He needed James. James was an expert lock picker and he could break into the mayor's safe of marriage records. If they were caught, they could use Remus's superhero status as a cover. People always listened to superheroes, even if they were lying.
Normally, Remus wouldn't have used his superhero identity as an excuse, but…these were special circumstances.
He rang James and waited for him to answer. James answered on the fourth ring. "Remus, it's two in the morning, this better be good."
"Listen, I know how we can uncover Silverdog's identity," Remus said quickly. "But we'd better hurry because if I know Silverdog as well as I do…he'll be after the marriage license too."
"...That's smart, looking at the license," James admitted. "But how am I going to help?"
"You know, with that special talent of yours."
Remus grinned as the rusted lock popped open with a click.
"The mayor should really hire a better security guard," James murmured, smiling. "Falling asleep on the job…that's very irresponsible." He smirked. Remus rolled his eyes.
"Did you forget what we're here? Now we need to search through these as quickly as possible. Look through the letter L first, he's likely sorted them by surname…"
James rifled around through the L section, while Remus started flicking through the others. He stopped short at a familiar name.
"Ha, I didn't know that Sirius was married."
"Must've been hit by that akuma," James muttered, now elbow deep in his section.
Remus couldn't resist and opened the file. Part of him was wondering who had married Sirius, but when he saw the other name, he dropped the file.
"James," he said in a tiny voice. "I think I know Silverdog's identity."
"What — how?" James dropped the stack of folders he was holding and peered over Remus's shoulder. "It should be filed under your —"
"It's not," he said shakily. "James, I'm — I'm Remus Black."
Sirius. Sirius Black. Sirius Black, his classmate, was his archnemesis and his husband. Sirius Black, with his lazy smile and long hair hanging in his eyes, who pulled pranks on his classmates and gave his lunch to the poorer students.
He was Silverdog.
"James, I'm — I'm not okay," he whispered, falling to his knees. "Sirius Black is my enemy and what am I supposed to do now?"
702 words
