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(Ruby PoV)
"Do you think that he's okay?"
"Ruby. He's fine."
"He always says that. But, ah-you know how it is. He didn't handle meeting his sisters very well."
"Well would you?" Weiss asked. She sliced forward into a Grimm. "I don't handle my family well."
"That's a bit different."
It was search and destroy time. Time to just kill monsters. Finally something I was good at. Helping Weiss and Cloud manage their parts of the relationship was hard. Not that they needed a ton of help but it was for me to worry about and for them to fall in love with one another like I had with both of them.
Saphron… the name of the girl with the gun and dagger. She'd wounded Cloud physically but I was more worried about the psychological damage she'd caused him. That they had all caused him. He had been delirious coming off of his bike. He'd been losing it. That made me more than worried. He had been talking about some kind of reunion.
One that would be between him and his family. His family… It seemed that he had it even worse than my own family did. We only had a problem child in Raven Branwen. And maybe my own mother I suppose, she'd died as hunters tended to do. It seemed that Cloud was the problem child in his own family. That was good news in his case. I mean Saphron had shot him. I remembered all their words.
'Ditch these girls,' and 'you'll always be our Jaune,' they'd said. They pleaded with him to come with them. They knew him at a time when he hardly seemed to know his own name. Hardly seemed to have his own identity. A moment when Salem was consuming him.
I sliced into Grimm black flesh with my scythe. That was what Crescent Rose was designed for. Not for fighting people but it was good at both. It tended to overwhelm opponents of all kinds. The sniper scythe was effective at long, medium, and short range.
My powers grew. Even if it wasn't at the incredible rate Cloud's had. But then I hadn't been through the kind of horrible crap he had. That bit at my heart. He was… he was probably going to die from his family troubles. They were ultra lethal. His sisters worked well as a team and then there was his mom who was a nightmare to even think about with who knows what kinds of powers.
It was just… it was so unbelievably unfair. I finally had both my best friends and then there was the reminder that one of them would be taken from me sooner or later. Probably sooner if Cloud got his way. He didn't want to die like that and I could scarcely blame him.
I whipped my weapon around and took pot shots into a Sphinx. It died from the incredibly powerful rounds I had in Crescent Rose. It vanished into the powder that the Grimm always seemed to leave behind. Cloud would have taken those kinds of shots and come out almost clean.
I didn't want him to die at all. And I selfishly wanted him to cling to life if only for a little longer. I had to temper myself with the reminder that he could live a while longer yet but really seemed to be a question of when his family problems would catch up to him and devour him.
Here I went again. Like I could hardly wait for my heart to break. I needed him. The thought of life without him left me unbelievably empty. Was this all that love was? Jumping from one hurtle to the next? It hurt so much this way.
It was what Blake had described and why Penny had encouraged me to let him go. He was the man of my dreams, though. It wasn't in the strength he possessed but in its neighbor. His dedication. He worked so hard and to have things end this way was so unfair. I refused it. A plea against fate to take him. I didn't want to relinquish him. I could imagine myself sobbing over his coffin. I would carry it too. I was strong enough, certainly. Weaker than he was now but strong enough to carry him to his grave.
Was this all that love was? It hurt so much. So much more than anything else had. He was going to die! He was going to die. He was going to die, and there was nothing I could do about it.
I let my rage out with a scream against the nearest monster. I clipped the Chimera's wings then turned to petals and dashed around to its neck where I pulled up with a gunshot down for momentum.
It felt so toxic. But I couldn't help it. I felt so toxic. How could life hurt me like this. I clipped a Beowulf's leg and crippled it before I whipped my weapon around and shot it with a shout.
I dashed back in a burst of petals. It was so unfair. I wanted so much more. I wanted to drain him. Of all the life that I knew he held. I couldn't help it. I liked him. And like I told Yang, so what? Instead I seemed to be addressing the universe as I clipped another monster with my massive blade.
I twisted it around my body and pulled and brought down another monster. I dived in. It was all I could do to find release. Killing monsters was all I could rediscover myself in.
This couldn't be what love was. Just waiting for him to die, for his enemies to take him. Violet and Lavender had been the other two's names and they bore semblances like his. Violet had his speed and Lavender had the power to expend charges of immense strength.
They beckoned me to do more. To fight harder. I panted before I approached another Chimera mid petal burst. I swung around its neck and took its head off with my sheer momentum.
I screamed as I did so. It was so unfair. He was going to die. I didn't worry about anyone else though I knew Weiss was supporting me with glyphs to help me maintain my pace.
I slashed and cut and kicked and shot my way through hordes of demons. It was like swallowing poison. But it was the sort of environment I thrived in.
I wanted to have his kids one day. I wasn't sure what Weiss felt about it but I wanted to bear his children. They'd be so cute. I wanted to have them and carry them. That might have been selfish of me, too. I could hardly tell what was and wasn't selfish in this position. So close to him. I wanted his children. Our children. I wanted a family. A big one at that. But who knew if he would live that long. I wanted to have his children. I wanted all the misery that came with having kids just to see the bright faces of my babies. Our babies, that was.
Our babies. I fought with a renewed virve. I dragged Crescent Rose around my body and then upwards and split the face of a Sphinx in two. I was angry. I was furious. The air felt thin but I scarcely needed to breathe.
Here I go again… I slashed down a creeper with ease and put my boot on the head of another. Weiss launched me into the air with a glyph and I cut down another monster. A Chimera. I… I hated them. These demons.
As far as I knew, this was all that love could be. Jumping through worries. My mother had died so young for me. Would Cloud be that same way for my own babies. I couldn't imagine having them with anyone else. I needed him. I needed him to live.
It felt like some kind of messed up dream. One I'd wake up from and Jaune and I would be sharing a tent. He'd rouse me from my nightmare and this would all be over. Except it never came.
I was a siren of destruction on the battlefield. Just because Cloud could beat me now didn't make me any less imposing.
It was a long term dream, having his babies. I didn't know if Weiss shared it with me. We were too focused on the here and now to really talk about that. The thing was that Cloud might not have much time. What was the best I could hope for? I really didn't even know that about our situation. Would he die at twenty five. Maybe I'd get lucky and he'd make it as far as forty. I could start that family by then but I couldn't finish it. I'd have to raise them without their father and who knew if Cloud would even be willing.
He might decide he didn't want kids and what would I do then? I couldn't force him. I couldn't in good conscience trick him. I wasn't sure where he stood on the issue. I needed to talk to him. I wanted a family though. A big one. Seven or eight children seemed a bit much but I wanted at least three, I think. I'd settle for two or even one if that was what he was willing to give. I just had no idea. I wanted my babies. I wanted my family.
That was if he didn't die fighting Salem sooner which seemed likely too. He was resisting her but day by day she took something from him. And seeing his sisters had only accelerated that.
And what if I was just passing along his own disorder to my kids. To my children. I couldn't bring them into the world just to watch my own children fall apart in my arms. Their little bodies dissolving in my hands. Aura could only do so much and while I was sure that they would have theirs unlocked young I didn't want to consign them to Salem so young.
My dreams of an XXL family seemed to be dying.
"Weiss?" I asked during a lull in the fighting.
"Ruby?" She wondered right back. She sounded concerned. She'd been letting me work out my frustrations on the monsters. She'd been waiting for the right time to listen.
I bit my lip before I schooled up my courage. "I want to have his kids. I always wanted a big family."
"Ruby…" she trailed at a whisper.
"But he might die. Let's face it. He will die. I could die too but Cloud will die and he'll probably die before forty. And I'd like his last name at some point. I love him. I don't know what you think but I'd always want you to be involved with that."
"What are you saying? That you want to start now?"
"I don't know. If it's my only chance that I'll get then maybe. I want his kids. Plural. As in two or three. Maybe even four. I want a lot. "
"That's… that's so many." It sounded like far too much for her.
"I want a big family," I repeated. "And you?"
"I don't know. Maybe I'd have one or two kids. Probably one," Weiss said back. "I haven't been thinking about it too much. There's been Salem to consider. She won't die. What if I'm just passing that along to his kids."
"I don't know. I just… I always wanted a big family. And now that I have him I know that he'd be an excellent father. I just don't know…"
"You don't know if he'd live long enough." Weiss finished. She named my fears one at a time. "Or if he'd agree to have them. What if he decides the risk is too great? It'd be wrong to trick him, however possible."
"They'd be so cute though… but yeah." I agreed. "I've been thinking about it. Ever since we ran into his sisters."
We were both silent for a beat.
"Do you want kids, Weiss?" I wondered quietly.
"If… if I met the right person. Then I always thought I would. And… and I suppose I have, met the right person. Right people, that is. He's strong and mature. He'd be a wonderful father and you would be a great mother. You're so gentle and tender."
"He's sweet and kind," I disagreed in part.
"He is. But it would be wrong to trick him. Or to try and have his kids without him knowing. I've been on the pill since I was sixteen. And he could always decide that's how things should stay and I would struggle to disagree with him. I suppose I'd have one or perhaps even two but not without his express consent."
I chewed on my lip. "I'd want my kids to grow up with yours. Their brothers or sisters."
"Ruby…"
"Just so long as so many wasn't too much to overwhelm him. We'd be there too so they wouldn't ever be alone. We'd do it together." It sounded like a good plan. It just depended on a few things. Like Cloud living. For goodness sake, like him living. How could I even think that?
"Ruby, he could really die. Do you think you could do it without their father."
I bit my lip even more. "Maybe. I'm not sure. I want his children though. Even if it's just to carry some piece of him forward. You know?"
"Have you talked to him at all about this?"
I shook my head. "Amongst everything else there hasn't been a good chance to talk about our future. About our future. And I want one. Even if we can never take Salem down."
"I don't know that I'd bring a child into this world with Salem in it," Weiss returned. "Could you? With such evil present."
I whined a little. "I'm not sure. I want Salem gone too but I still want my life. I don't want her existence to stop me from living mine."
"I suppose… you don't want one now, do you?" Weiss seemed hesitant. But my answer was fast.
It felt like my stars would never line up, though.
"No. I'm not ready yet. But who knows how much longer Cloud will be around? It's got me thinking."
"You could always meet somebody after him."
"No." It was all I said. It was all I could say. There would be nobody like him after him except Weiss and I couldn't have her children. Medical science had gone far but it wasn't that good yet. Not past special projects and after their father I wouldn't want that for my children. Not for my babies.
"I-I suppose that's true… There's nobody quite like him. I suppose one or even two wouldn't be so bad. Especially if I was having them with you," Weiss murmured.
"I want my family. It just seems impossible now."
"I don't know what to tell you, Ruby."
"I was raised without my mother and I turned out like this. Not so bad." If I did say so myself. "Yang helped but it was mostly just Dad and Qrow. You and I could do an even better job. Someplace quiet. Away from the big cities. Especially if their father is still around."
"That sounds like a wonderful dream, Ruby."
"Not just a dream, Weiss. A plan. I want this. Even more so if Cloud's plan to stop his mother works."
"Ruby…"
"And I'll make cookies all the time and it'll be perfect."
"Ruby… what if he says 'no.' What if the risk is just too much. I said I'd struggle to argue with him if he said so. Wouldn't you?"
"Of course. But they'd be so cute though. With their father's eyes and maybe his hair."
"He does have handsome eyes," Weiss agreed. "I always thought yours were prettier though."
"Aw…" I trailed off. "Maybe a bit of both. The benefits of having more than one. A whole bunch. Arms full of babies."
"We should get back to work," Weiss said quickly. I didn't push her.
We did get back to work. Weiss and I worked well as a team. Her glyphs augmented my speed and my speed allowed me to support her where no one else could. We slaughtered Grimm by the dozens together.
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-WG
