HE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED RETURNS
Last night the Minister for Magic…
Serena rolled her eyes at the Prophet's headline and pushed the paper away. Samuel and Tonks were pouring over another copy on the other side of the table, Molly and Arthur were reading that morning's Quibbler and the rest of the room appeared to have already read the article and was buzzing with gossip about what had happened.
Serena hadn't seen the room so crowded in a long time. She stood with Remus at the back, Lavinia cradled in his arms, babbling at him and holding a small rattle in her chubby fists.
Serena stroked her hair lovingly and kissed her other little hand. "Samuel said you tried her with carrots the other day."
Remus gave a sad smile. "Yeah… we… we've started solid foods… he… Sirius thought it was time."
"How did she like them?" Serena asked, swallowing the lump in her throat.
"She preferred the sweet potato," he smiled and his smile widened as Lavinia babbled "to, to, to," at them.
The room hushed suddenly as Albus Dumbledore swept in, his purple wizard's hat slightly askew and his eyes tired. Severus followed him and the two men sat down at the table where the other inner circle members were gathered.
Serena slipped an arm around Remus and leant against his side, rubbing his back soothingly as Albus began the account of last night's events.
Sometimes she tuned him out, sometimes she listened as other members asked questions, but mostly she kept one eye on Remus, and one on Severus whose left hand was clenching and unclenching on top of the table. She grimaced at the thought of the pain he must be in and the control he needed to stop his limbs from jerking in front of everyone.
When Albus neared the end of the tale, Moody cleared his throat and Serena shivered.
"Was this vision like the one that saved Arthur's life?"
"Yes and no," Albus said calmly. "My belief is that Lord Voldemort became aware of his connection with Harry at that time. When he realised that Harry had seen the snake attack Arthur, he began conceiving a plan to use that connection to his advantage."
"So the boy was just a sitting time bomb then?" Moody barked.
"Not quite," Albus said quietly. "As soon as this became apparent to me, I devised a plan to help Harry close the connection." Serena felt her stomach drop. This was not how she had wanted the truth to come out, not in front of all these people! Not like this!
Across the room Severus Snape was feeling the exact same emotions. As if he wasn't hated enough by these insufferable people, he thought to himself. Well now they would have a real, concrete reason to hate him and be done with it. Let them, let them judge him, but he stood by what he had done. That pathetic little sneak of a boy had dared to look into his pensieve… he didn't give a shit what the consequences were. Black's death was of no significance to him.
"Harry has been taking Occlumency lessons with Severus since January," Albus explained to the room.
"Actually, Headmaster," Severus interrupted slowly, preparing himself for the upcoming onslaught, "he hasn't-"
"He's been taking lessons with me instead," Serena cut across him loudly. His eyes flew to her, the shock he felt only hidden by his occlumency. She refused to look at him, she hadn't even moved her head an inch, and he felt anger and betrayal fire up inside of him. There was a general murmur in the room and Severus watched, with rage and awe as Serena managed something that very few people achieved: She lied to Albus Dumbledore. "Severus did the first few lessons with Harry but they weren't getting anywhere, it's no secret they both dislike each other, so I offered to take over. I've been teaching Harry ever since."
"You?" Moody barked, "An Occlumens?"
"Yes," she said calmly. "A Master Occlumens, actually. I learnt from the best." Severus hid his snarl as she dared wave a hand in his direction. He was furious at her betrayal, he could feel his shoulders trying to tremble with anger, but his emotions were all confused. Lying openly to Albus was one thing, but this meant that she had been lying to Severus' face too, for at least six weeks, and he hadn't had a clue. He clenched and unclenched his fists behind his back slowly. The pain was mounting inside and this only worsened it.
"From Snape?" Moody continued. "Impossible, it takes years to become a Master Occlumens."
Severus sighed and clenched his fists once more. "It took Serena approximately eighteen months to become a Master Occlumens," he said quietly to the room, his fingers digging into his palm as she still refused to look at him. "I assure you, her skills are as finely-tuned as my own… She could lie to you all and you wouldn't. have. a . clue…"
At his slow, targeted words, her eyes finally flicked over to his.
Nothing.
Her eyes and mind were completely blank and void of emotion and it only made Severus even more furious. What else had she been hiding from him?
"I was unaware that you had taken over Harry's lessons," Albus continued, frowning. "What can you tell us about Harry's occlumency, Serena?"
She cleared her throat and turned back to the Headmaster.
"For those that understand Occlumency, we had been practising the first defence mechanism of the mind, the aim was that before Harry goes to bed, he could clear his mind and ensure that he dreams, rather than having his thoughts connected to the Dark Lord's. In theory, Harry made a lot of progress with me, he managed the techniques well… the problem…"
The problem is that you betrayed me!
"…is that I don't believe Harry was using these techniques when he was alone. He kept seeing the Department of Mysteries, just like the night when Arthur was attacked. And he was… curious… I think that-"
She cut off suddenly and there was a slight pink tinge in her cheeks.
"Yes?" Albus said, frowning.
"Nothing, that's all," she said smoothly.
"What do you think, Serena?" he asked kindly. Severus sneered inside his head. She'd have to learn to control that telling blush of hers.
"Spit it out girl," Moody barked.
He watched as she turned to glare at Moody before crossing her arms over her chest and standing up straighter. "Fine," she snapped, "I don't believe Harry understood the danger he was putting himself in. I don't think that keeping him in the dark has helped at all."
"It saved Arthur's life," Molly said firmly.
"And it lost Sirius'."
A silence followed her words and Severus found his anger directed to every single one of the others. Serena was right. If Potter had known more, if he'd have understood why he needed to block the Dark Lord out of his mind… And yes, in the end, it was Potter's fault that Black was dead. Everyone was thinking it, Serena just had the guts to say it.
"Perhaps," Albus said, trying to diffuse the tension, "perhaps Severus you could tell us what happened at the school."
Severus scowled and then began his part of the story. Controlling his anger was becoming difficult. He had to watch as Remus took Serena's hand in his and they shared a sympathetic look of understanding together. He narrated his tale as quickly and efficiently as possible, but all he wanted was to get out of there.
When he had finished, Tonks took up the story and began describing the battle. Severus didn't listen. He didn't need to know. He had too much anger inside him and he could feel it threatening the peace inside his mind. He stood up suddenly and pushed his way towards the door.
He caught Serena's eye and jerked his head towards the stairs, ignoring the clench of rage inside his stomach as she looked at him with innocent brown eyes.
He led her into the living room but was surprised when she was the one to slam the door, before waving her wand in a string of movements, setting wards and privacy charms all around them.
"Come on then," she said angrily, turning on him, and he frowned when he saw her wand in her hand. "Get it out, get mad, get angry, tell me everything you've been screaming at yourself inside your head for the past ten minutes."
"What's this?" he hissed, stepping closer to her, "another attempt to manipulate me?"
"Ha!" she shrieked, "yes, yes, I did it to manipulate you, of course I did."
"You betrayed me!" he shouted, feeling a flicker of triumph when she flinched at his voice. "You went behind me back! You lied to me! You chose Potter!"
"I chose what was right!" she shouted back, just as angrily. "I chose what needed to be done! You see it as a betrayal if you want, you see it as me lying to you. I didn't once lie to you, not once."
"Don't try to justify yourself, please," he sneered, his fists tightening. "Not lying is not the same as hiding the truth. You chose Potter and that's all I need to know. You wouldn't be the first."
He ducked rapidly as the candlesticks that had been on the fireplace hurtled across the room to smash against the painting behind him. Serena stood opposite him, her hands clenched, her body trembling just as his was.
"Stop it!" she said through gritted teeth, "stop hiding in the past! We are right now and that's all we are! You and me right this minute! I didn't choose Potter, I tried to cover your mistakes and help a young boy that was in danger."
"And how did that fair for you?"
She made a furious, raw sound, and this time it was his turn to flinch. She screamed with anger and suddenly it wasn't just candlesticks that flew through the air. Books and paintings and cushions and stools and photographs all span around them, smashing against the walls, tearing the wallpaper, shattering the mirror, ripping the pages of books, ripping a hole in the sofa. The ground below him began to tremble, he could feel her rage crackling in the air, air that was growing colder and colder and when he found her eyes they were full of fear, now, and he realised what was happening.
"Serena?" he almost had to shout to hear himself over the tornado of objects and he rushed to her, grasping her face between his hands and trying to delve into her eyes. "Serena, your potion? Did you take your potion last night?"
Her eyes grew, if possible, even wider, and she shook her head an inch, her bottom lip trembling.
"Look at me," he said sharply, focussing her eyes on his. "Look at me, I'm not angry, love, I'm not angry, and I know you're not either. You're scared. I know you're scared. And you're sad. But that's ok, that's normal. Think about the sadness, think about your grief, let go of your rage, little one, let it go."
He tried to channel his magic through her, tried to push his calm and reassurance into her mind, to focus her brain on one feeling, as overwhelming as it may be. He felt the ground calm beneath his feet, the walls stopped shaking, the pages of books slowly floated down to the carpet and as they stood, panting together, all that was left was the icy cold air that made their gasps for breath visible between them.
Severus hushed her as her body trembled beneath his fingers. "It's ok," he whispered, caressing her face. "It's ok." He reached into his robe and pulled out a small black box. He had to step away from her to enlarge it and pull out one of the five bottles inside. With trembling fingers, he pressed it towards her. "Here. I always carry a dose, just in case."
Her eyes filled with tears when he said that and he didn't understand why, but as she drank the potion in one he was relieved to feel the temperature slowly growing warmer and warmer around them.
He watched as she moved to the fireplace and looked at her fragmented reflection in the broken mirror.
"I forgot," she said faintly. "With everything that's happened…" When she turned around to face him he felt his stomach clench when he recognised the young girl he had met in Albus' office almost three years ago. She looked slightly defeated, young, tired…
"I'm sorry, Severus," she said quietly. "I'm not angry at you, not at all… I'm scared… I know you're in pain, I know you've been to hell and back … I… you don't need this as well… I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Harry… It wasn't to go against you, it was just to help him… and I'm sorry I didn't trust you with that information."
A year ago, he could have never forgiven her, he knew that. But they had come so far, and suddenly he found that he could.
He nodded silently and hobbled across the room to pull her into his arms. She sunk into his touch and he closed his eyes, breathing in her lemony smell.
"We're going to be ok," she murmured into his cloak. "Let's just get through this stupid meeting… You should go, they'll want more information about last night. I'll be there in a moment."
Severus nodded and left the ruined room swiftly.
Serena took a deep breath and pressed her head against the fireplace, the picture she had given Sirius for Christmas lay broken against the stone. Her, Remus and Sirius were at a quidditch game, arms around each other, laughing and talking without a care in the world.
Once she had righted and repaired the room, she lifted her wards and opened the door. She was startled to find Albus blocking her path.
"Albus-"
He swept up to her and his long fingers touched her cheek, his blue eyes piercing hers deeply, but not entering, she was too good for that now.
"I felt the magic," he said in his quiet voice. "Are you under control?"
She felt her cheeks blushing. "Yes," she said as smoothly as she could. "Yes, everything is fine, I'm sorry if I worried you."
She made to move but Albus still hadn't moved his fingertips from her face and she could feel the worry and sadness and adrenaline pulsating through him. "You nearly died last night," he said finally.
She closed her eyes for a second, remembering the Dark Lord's curse, his red eyes, his ruthless look.
"I didn't," she said quietly.
"You put yourself in great danger. I… I would be very sad to lose you, my child."
She grimaced. "Albus, I am very sorry for what happened… I was out of my mind to let Harry go after her, I really was… I was a terrible teacher and I nearly got him killed. I…" she took a deep breath and said the words she dreaded. "I will officially hand in my resignation in the morning."
Albus straightened up in front of her and raised his bushy eyebrows. "You shall do nothing of the sort," he said calmly. "I do not accept your resignation, I already have one new teacher to find for September, it seems, and I do not wish to look for a second."
"But-"
"Your actions were not in the confines of the school."
"But I-"
"You went to the Ministry to save students."
"But I nearly-"
"You witnessed a friend die, you were overcome by emotion… You know as well as I that love makes us do unimaginable things."
Serena stared at him. "You're not angry?"
"Oh, decidedly angry, but not at you my dear, no. You underestimate the place you now occupy at the castle. The school needs you… and I would miss our little chats and cups of tea far too much if you were ever to leave…"
Serena smiled warmly at him. "I've really missed you these last few months, Albus."
"As have I, child," he said softly. "And anyhow, can you imagine what a foul mood our potions master would be in if ever I let you resign?"
Serena chuckled. "Not any fouler than usual, surely?"
Albus laughed too. "Come," he said, holding out his arm. "The meeting is continuing in our steed. We should join them."
She followed him down the dark stairs, feeling slightly touched by his display of emotion. When all eyes fell curiously upon her, she realised that they must have all felt the consequences of her powers. She wondered if they were scared, awed, or just nosy to know how Severus had made her so angry that she could lose control of her powers. Another bit of gossip that would no doubt circulate about their relationship, she thought bitterly.
She moved back to Remus' side. The other wizard looked… lost… utterly lost… He stood at the back of the meeting that was happening, and she knew what he was feeling, she knew how his mind was so overwhelmed, how his heart couldn't quite believe that the gaping hole that had been torn open was real, that Sirius was gone, that he wouldn't just burst in laughing with some stupid tale about why he was late. She knew he didn't care about Albus' stupid plan, he didn't give a shit about Moody's opinion on Potter's protection, he didn't care about anything right then other than the pain tearing at his chest and the little girl sitting in his arms.
…
Albus had suggested that close friends of Sirius gather that evening for a memorial to Sirius, and Molly and Arthur had offered to host everyone at The Burrow. It was unsafe for them all to be seen outside and unprotected, but the Weasley house was secret-kept and everyone heartily agreed.
It was later that afternoon then, that Serena arrived back at Headquarters, having spent the afternoon in the castle helping Albus get everything back to normal.
She found Remus sitting on his bed whilst Vinnie tried to heave her little body around on the floor.
"She'll be crawling in no time," she said quietly, hovering in the doorframe.
Remus looked at her with sad eyes. "I wish he could see her. "It's not even been twenty-four hours but I feel like she's changing and he's missing it…"
Serena shut the door behind her and scooted onto the bed next to him. "Just because he's not here, doesn't mean he's not seeing her grow up," she said quietly, her eyes on the baby.
"Is that what you believe?" he asked, looking at her.
She shrugged. "Some days," she replied honestly.
"I don't know how to be a single dad."
"You don't have to be," she said, squeezing his knee. "And you're a wonderful dad, and you will continue to be one. You'll just be a bit more sleep deprived I would imagine."
Remus grimaced.
"Do you have her bag ready for tonight?"
Remus heaved himself out of the bed and crouched down at the bottom of the wardrobe. Serena saw that Sirius' belongings still glinted subtly from corners of the room, and she could see all his clothes hanging up next to Remus. They would tackle all that tomorrow, if he was ready.
"I've got the bottle and her milk, I need to grab one of those little pots from downstairs too, I think we'll try pea purée tonight. And if I change her nappy now then the cleaning spell will keep fresh until we get back."
"I'll get the pot," Serena said getting to her feet, "but you're in charge of the nappy."
He gave her a small smile and nodded and she hurried downstairs, her light black cloak flowing behind her.
"Hi everyone," she lifted a hand to greet the order members that were busy in the kitchen. Samuel and Tonks were pouring over a map of London, Moody was talking to Mundungus in the corner, Emmeline Vance, who Serena rarely saw at Headquarters, was on her way back out with old Dedalus Diggle in her stead, and Bill Weasley was just pulling a beer out of the fridge.
Hello," he greeted her cheerfully.
"Hi Bill, shouldn't you be at The Burrow?"
"Pfft, absolutely not, you know what Mum's like when she's expecting people round, she's been cleaning and yelling all day. I've come for a break, and I had information for Moody anyhow, didn't I Mad-Eye?" he added, his voice raised.
Moody scowled at him and Bill chuckled. "We had a bet on about the dementors," Bill said, smiling and brushing his long hair out of his eyes. She caught a glimpse of a fang-shaped earring.
"Well, I'm looking for baby food," she said, turning to her task. "Pea purée apparently."
"How is Remus?" Bill asked solemnly.
"I'm not sure yet," Serena said quietly. "It's hard to tell… but… I think that having Lavinia is keeping his mind focussed elsewhere. It can't be a bad thing."
The front door went again and a few seconds later, Severus appeared, dressed in his usual black robes, looking tense. He spoke a few words to Moody, handed a document to Tonks and then finally joined her and Bill, whom he ignored.
"I need to speak with you," he said quietly.
Bill took that as his cue and excused himself.
Serena gave Severus a frustrated look. "You could have at least said hello."
Severus ignored her comment completely. "The Dark Lord has decided that Peter Pettigrew is to stay with me in my house," he said curtly. "He will be arriving on Friday. I am unsure as to whether I am keeping an eye on Pettigrew or if he is keeping an eye on me. Either way, I can assure you that I had no choice in the matter, and I want this as much as you do."
Serena took this news like another stinging loss. Spinner's End, her home, her and Severus' safe space… even that was being taken from her. She wouldn't be able to go back there as long as Pettigrew was there, she'd have to move out all of her things, she'd never be able to sit on the sofa with Severus, drinking wine and reading books, ever again.
And Severus… he would have to stay there with Pettigrew, a creepy spy, pretending that he leads a bachelor's life, whilst his wife stays elsewhere. They would have to sleep separately all summer, she realised, and just that idea made her throat burn and her heart beat a little faster.
She swallowed. This was going to be much more difficult for Severus than it would be for her, she reasoned. At least she could stay in Grimmauld Place, surrounded by her friends. She pulled her occlumency shields firmly into place and looked up at his expressionless eyes.
"I shall spend tomorrow morning at Spinner's End moving out my things then," she said calmly. "We will have to ensure we wipe all of my magical signature. And maybe make the guest bedroom a tad more uncomfortable. And put wards on your laboratory."
Severus gave a curt nod, but she could see his teeth were grinding together inside his mouth.
"Perhaps you could try and sleep here once or twice a week? Say that Albus expects it or something?"
Severus gave a small shrug at that one.
"And… and we're lucky that it will only be for the holidays, once we're back at Hogwarts we'll be able to live together again."
He swallowed and she saw his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.
"Yes," he said curtly, "the discomfort will be short lived."
She nodded and then glanced around to make sure no one could overhear them. "It makes me incredibly sad though," she said softly. "And I know it makes you sad, too."
Severus' jaw clenched and then his eyes softened ever so slightly. "It does," he said in a husky voice.
She gave him a small smile, hoping to show him that he didn't need to worry about her. "How are the tremors? What potions have you taken?"
Severus stood up a little straighter as if to prove that he was fine. "Better," he said quietly. "I've taken everything I can."
"Yes, well, you don't have to come tonight, you know that?"
"I do," he said quietly. "It would be strange if I was not present. And… Remus deserves it."
She felt the sincerity in his words and her heart glowed.
"Okay, I suppose we should be heading off." She turned to the rest of the room who were pulling on coats and travelling robes. "Are you all heading to The Burrow?"
They nodded and replied yes to her.
"I'll go and get Remus."
A few minutes later, Remus, Severus, Serena and baby Lavinia stepped into the floo and arrived promptly at The Burrow.
Serena stayed close to Remus as they greeted their friends. Once again, Serena was so grateful to have baby Lavinia. Yes, there were pitying glances and sad, uncomforting words, but almost everyone started talking about Vinnie, too, and Remus seemed to find it easier to talk about his daughter than his partner.
Severus had disappeared into a corner, so her and Remus settled down onto the sofa and sat Vinnie between them, conjuring her a stuffed animal to play with.
"How you doing? Ready to run screaming from the room yet?"
Remus gave a small smile. "Not yet," he said in a tired voice. "It just all feels so surreal, to be honest."
She gave his knee a squeeze. "Yeah, I remember feeling like that. As though everything was happening around me and I was just frozen to the spot, not quite realising what was going on."
Their eyes fell to the sideboard Molly had cleared and filled with two large photos and several candles. The first photo was a portrait of Sirius, looking handsome, ready for a night out with his work. The second photo was of him, Remus and Lavinia just a few months ago.
"Is this what it was like last time?" she asked Remus sadly, making the stuffed animal move across Vinnie's lap.
Remus swallowed. "Yeah… this is how it started… and by the end… well, there weren't many of us left."
Serena bit her lip. She sometimes forgot that they had all been through this before.
"I remember," Remus said quietly, looking at the photos opposite. "The first couple of deaths really woke us all up, you know, really reminded us what we had gotten ourselves into… and the torture of the Longbottoms was really frightening… and by the end… I just stopped counting… When James was murdered…" Remus' voice broke and he swallowed heavily. "Well, it was hard," he said quietly. "Even if it meant the end of the war… it was still hard… The problem was that we thought Peter had died too… didn't realise it was that scumbag that had betrayed them all along…"
Serena leant her head back against the sofa and closed her eyes, trying to drown out the babble of conversation around them.
"I just find it so surreal sometimes," she almost whispered. "Not having Kings here… never seeing Sirius again… even- even in work, fuck, I've spent the last year staring at an empty space where Cedric Diggory used to sit. Not a single kid wanted to sit in his spot so it just stayed empty, like some horrid reminder that a child should be there…"
Remus sniffed and stroked Lavinia's hair gently.
"It's shit, isn't it," he murmured. "But I guess that's why everyone keeps fighting. That's why Sirius went charging into the Ministry, you know? He didn't want any more kids to die."
They sat in silence for a while, sipping at their drinks, and watching the others. Albus had arrived with Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley, who had been allowed to leave the castle that evening for the gathering.
"What's he doing here?" She turned and saw Potter, sandwiched between his loyal friends pointing an accusative finger at Severus. "He didn't even like Sirius!"
Severus, who thankfully hadn't yet drawn his wand simply raised an eyebrow at him and sneered, well aware that half the room was listening. "I, Potter, am here to support a friend of mine." His eyes flickered to Remus and Serena saw a look of surprise on the widower's face. Remus gave him a small nod of thanks. Serena thought it was perhaps the first time Severus had publicly declared himself 'friend' to anyone.
"Here we go," she muttered to Remus, getting to her feet and anticipating the fight.
"But you didn't help him!" Harry continued loudly, and Serena could see Miss Granger's hand tugging at his arm as she whispered in his ear to stop. "You ignored my message and-"
Serena couldn't let them ruin this for Remus. She crossed the room swiftly, grabbed Harry's arm from Miss Granger and pulled him out of the room. "This is not the time," she said quietly, "come with me."
"But he didn't even react!"
"This is not the time," she snapped again, pushing him forward.
He followed her complacently, but she didn't let go of his arm until they were in the kitchen and out of earshot. The boy turned on her, furious.
"How can you defend him! How can you believe him! He hated Sirius! He's always hated him!"
"Yes," she said as calmly as possible. "You are not wrong, Harry, Professor Snape and Sirius hated each other. The feeling was entirely mutual."
"Snape was always goading him-"
"Professor Snape, Harry-"
"Always taunting him-"
"I can assure you Sirius was just as bad at goading and taunting."
"He didn't even listen to my message! I told him what I saw! I told him and he looked at me as though he didn't understand a word!"
"Don't be so naïve boy!" she snapped finally. "Surely Professor Dumbledore has told you this? What would you have him do, give you a wink, a smile and translate the message there and then in front of Umbridge?!"
"No, but-"
"The moment," now she had raised her voice she had trouble controlling it and the anger was heavily present in her words. "The moment that Professor Snape heard your message he made his way to the school gates and apparated to headquarters to see if Sirius was safe. When he found no one, he managed to contact me and I assured him Sirius was fine. Then he got back to the school and realised you were gone. He worked out where you were going and who was with you, left the grounds once more and summoned the available Order members to form a rescue party. He found Professor Dumbledore and awaited our return. So don't you dare put any of the blame on him."
He was still panting heavily but his shoulders had lost some of their challenge. "It's my fault," he said finally
"Of course it's your fault," she sighed, sitting heavily down onto one of the wooden bar stools. "And it's my fault for thinking I could teach you occlumency, and it's Samuel's fault for not covering his back, and the Ministry's fault for stopping communication and not believing us, and it's Albus' fault for not explaining more, and it's Sirius' fault for being too cocky and not concentrating… it's everyone's fault Harry. But we're at war… and if you focus on blame it won't get us anywhere… Sirius is gone, he's not the first, he won't be the last. But today is about him. It's not about anger or blame, it's just about remembering him…"
"It's not fair," he said weakly.
"I know."
"He was my only family."
"You find family elsewhere, you know." She nodded pointedly towards the door where his two classmates were watching him nervously.
"Harry?"
Harry, who had started to move towards the door turned back questioningly. "I'd ask you to leave Professor Snape alone this evening." There was no doubting the seriousness of her tone of voice.
He half-shrugged, half-nodded, and then left the room.
She stayed sitting there long after the boy, or young man, as she supposed he was now, had gone.
She didn't know how long had passed until a large hand rested gently on her shoulder.
She looked up into his face and tried to smile.
"I thank you," he said in a quiet voice. "For… taking my defence…"
"Just doing my job," she said dryly, climbing slowly to her feet. "Defender of Snapes," she said ironically, but a gentle finger underneath her chin stopped all attempts at humour. His dark eyes pierced hers and she could see the one question in his eyes, too pathetic to be pronounced out loud.
"I'm fine," she sighed heavily, leaning her forehead against his shoulder. "I just… I just feel so old," she sighed, closing her eyes as his arms enveloped her in the safety of his embrace.
"I know," he said quietly into her ear. "I know."
The memorial was a quiet affair after that. Arthur Weasley said a few words about Sirius and they repeated a toast, and then everyone slowly headed back to their respective homes.
Serena accompanied Remus to headquarters, helped him put Vinnie to bed and then went downstairs to floo back to Hogwarts. Severus had insisted on waiting for her, and they stepped together into the fireplace, looking forward to sharing a bed together, perhaps for one of the last times until next September.
