A/N: Being stuck, I have decided to go back and rewrite to simplify the plot and such. Ideally, I'd like to make it less dark but I may be incapable (we'll see). I hope you'll check out new edits as I make them ^^
When Sinbad opened his eyes, the room was swimming. Around him, he could make out the concerned forms of his friends hovering over him and the ceiling of a room indoors. Where was he? Hadn't he been making a speech outside? There had been a crowd of hopeful citizens cheering for the new country. They had brimmed with hope and enthusiasm. As his eyes focused, he took in the faces of the people around him. Mystras sat on the side of his bed, his face contorted with worry. Standing to the side, Rurumu and Hinahoho exchanged uncertain glances. Vittel's gaze was cast to the ground, and Ja'far's lips pulled into a thin line. This was not the atmosphere he would have expected.
Something was wrong. He shot up as soon as he realized it. His hand grasped his forehead as the muscles between his brows pulled together. Remember… remember. He had been giving a speech, he was certain. The ceremony had been going smoothly, and then… what happened? Why was he here? Had he passed out? Was that why everyone looked so grim?
"What… Why am I in bed? What happened to the founding ceremony?"
"Are you serious?" It was Ja'far's voice. Why did he sound so angry, like some kind of feral animal? That wasn't like him, not anymore. Sinbad rubbed his forehead, trying to clear the fog that had settled over him. If he could just figure out what was going on, maybe he could fix whatever was wrong. "Do you not remember you declared a revolution?"
Sinbad's stomach flopped. Suddenly, he imagined it was one of the fish he used to catch with his father, flopping wet and frantic on the dock, its glassy eyes gazing up at a threat it couldn't understand. He had declared war?
"Huh? I don't remember doing that…" Why would he? It went against everything he believed.
Ja'far seethed. "You had Thalia apprehended when she tried to stop you! Why did you do that Sin?"
Thalia… The rush of memories from this morning flooded him. That profound, almost religious moment they'd shared in this same room. The warmth thoughts of her brought to him welled up his stomach, mixing with shame, fear, and confusion to create a sickening stew. If it was true, if he had done what Ja'far was accusing him of, what must she be thinking right now? Running his fingers through his hair, he glanced at Ja'far.
"Thalia… is she okay?"
An unexpected voice answered. It was Serendine's. "Thalia's fine. Angry, but fine."
Sinbad glanced in the direction of the door, where she had positioned herself with her head held high. Her armor, black as night, was new. It looked expensive, and in the back of his mind, he questioned where she had managed to procure something so expensive as a fugitive. But, he ignored that thought. Seeing her safe was a relief. He flashed her a fragile smile, as if to say "welcome home," but when she looked back at him, her eyes were cold.
"You're wondering what happened to you, right? Do you remember when a year ago, while Thalia was engaged, I requested a djinn equip battle?" She crossed her arms over her chest. "You thought you won, but that's when I put you under Zepar's control. I've been using it to spy on you."
Her words added two more ingredients to the vile potion sloshing around in his stomach: betrayal and violation. She had used him, invaded his privacy— his very mind so that she could act out her sick revenge fantasy? How frequently had she been checking in on him? This morning when Thalia had trusted him… or any of the other times… how often had Serendine witnessed those private moments? A wave of nausea washed over him as he realized she probably had, in fact, witnessed at least one of their encounters. Those moments that Thalia had trusted him to keep private, they had been compromised because of him. He had unwittingly spilled her secrets and his own.
His hands clenched the blanket in his lap, and he repeated her words incredulously, hoping he'd misheard. "You've been spying on me?"
Serendine's lips twitched upward. "Spying is only one of Zepar's abilities. Today I used one of the others. I took control of your body and gave the speech you should have given. I even used Baal's power against Barbarossa."
Sinbad wished he would throw up and purge himself of the roiling emotions and nausea that just kept building inside him. Just like that, she had taken control of his body and used it however she pleased, and for such a vile purpose, too. She had made him declare war. His body— the one thing he had complete dominion over, the one place he'd never imagined would be violated like this. If he couldn't feel safe inside his own skin, where could he?
"That was you?" It was Ja'far, and his reaction only made her confession seem more real.
Back. Sinbad wanted to go back— back to this morning, with the girl of his dreams in his arms. With her, he felt safe and whole. She was the one person who had seen him through his darkest moments. Even if she couldn't undo what had happened today, having her by his side would make him feel safe, maybe even whole again because right now, he was shattering. He was shattering, and he was going to break.
"Thalia." His voice came out hoarse. "Where's Thalia?"
"I doubt she wants to talk to you." Serendine frowned. "The guards were pretty rough with her when you had them drag her away. Besides, she and my brother are well-protected where they are. You're not going to want her anywhere near what happens next."
"Next?" Sinbad's breath caught. This time, rage boiled inside him. "What do you mean 'next?'"
She looked away, her gaze remaining impassive. "My original plan was to kill Barbarossa on the spot. He got away, so now we have to set the contingency plan in motion."
Beads of sweat rolled down Sinbad's forehead, his back, his arms. "Do you have any idea what you're saying? You used me for your own selfish gains and threw my country into a revolution."
"You should be thanking me." Serendine narrowed her eyes at him. "This war was going to happen whether you wanted it or not. Do you think Barbarossa would just sit by idly while you harbor the people he's trying to eradicate? That he won't notice you're fucking one of them?" Another pang of nausea rolled through his stomach at the confirmation that she had seen what he and Thalia had been up to in private. "I made you a revolutionary instead of a martyr."
"You know," he said through gritted teeth, "You know how everyone feels about this country! We put hard work and sweat into this! Does that mean nothing to you?"
"I have other things I need to protect."
"Let me guess. Ceylan and Thalia." She'd used the family excuse when she'd told him about her involvement in the death of Thalia's father too. He'd bought it at the time, but how many more people did she plan to kill "for Thalia's sake?"
"And you." Serendine's gaze softened, and her voice was quiet. She gave him a look that he didn't quite understand and didn't care to. It was too much. How dare she pretend she was doing any of this for him. He lunged out of bed, grabbing her by the collar of her silk shirt. "Cut the crap! You're doing this for yourself!"
She remained unflinching, not so much as blinking.. "Maybe I am. Either way, what are you going to do about it? Barbarossa already returned to Parthevia and began military preparations. In a couple of days, his army will get here. It will take longer than that to get word to the members of your alliance. Are you really going to send away a valuable military asset like me? Or maybe you intend to kill me and offer my head to Barbarossa as a truce." Raising her rapier, she plunged it into her chest. Sinbad dropped her to the floor, his limbs refusing to act. He should help her. She had hurt him, but this was Serendine, his friend.
"However, I should warn you that is impossible." Serendine's blood began to turn black. It writhed and pulsated before reversing course, flowing back into the wound and leaving no evidence of an injury, not even a scar.
"Your wound…" Sinbad gaped at the smooth white skin of her sternum. "...it healed."
"Exactly. I'm not a human anymore. In order to achieve my deepest desire, I have given up even my human body." Approaching him, she grabbed his shoulder roughly. "Sinbad! Fight by my side! Help me defeat Barbarossa! Otherwise, this country won't survive!"
Sinbad took a step back. He didn't want to help her. Why had things turned out like this? Why…?
Serendine's frown deepened. "If you refuse, I'll simply use Zepar on you again. You have no choice but to fight."
Sinbad pressed his palm to his forehead, searching for any way out of this. He couldn't let Serendine violate him, not again. But how could he allow her to manipulate him? Wasn't there a third option? Some other path he could take?
To his relief, a soldier barged in. Perhaps she would buy him time to think.
"Excuse me, Miss Serendine!"
Serendine let go of his shoulder. "What is it?"
"News just arrived. Barbarossa has officially declared war against the Sindiran Kingdom. They've mobilized much faster than we expected. The first troops will arrive shortly."
No… His legs threatened to give out underneath him. Everything he'd worked toward, his dream, Serendine had taken it from his grasp so thoroughly. The only thing left for him to do was fight. He had no choice.
"Also…" The soldier shifted her weight anxiously. "...there's a woman here. She's demanding to see Thalia."
A woman…? Maybe it was Dinarzade?
Serendine's lips pulled into a tight line. "Send her away."
"About that…" The soldier glanced over her shoulder. "You should see this for yourself."
They dashed out of the room, following the corridors toward the reception hall in the front. As they approached, Sinbad picked up on the sound of agonized screams and, rising above them, Kayra's distinct voice.
"Where is she! Where is my sister!"
She sounded livid. Her soft, lyrical tone was now raw and forceful. As for the other voices, he could only hazard the guess that she was terrorizing a group of Serendine's soldiers. His heart hammered in his chest. Somehow, the idea that she was capable of such a feat was less surprising than it should have been. She was one of the most intimidating women he'd met, and knowing the lengths she'd gone to in order to protect Thalia before, Sinbad could only imagine what she would do to him once she learned Thalia was locked away by orders that had come from his mouth.
His stomach heaved, but he pushed himself forward anyway. There was still a chance he could talk her down. He just needed to convince her that siding with him would keep Thalia safer.
Sinbad, Serendine, and the soldier skidded to a halt when they reached the hall. They'd found the cause of the screams. Several dozen guards were pinned against the walls by black, undulating beams which emanated from a tome in Kayra's hands. Her dark hair stirred as though by an invisible wind. Her cold eyes turned to Sinbad and Serendine.
"Where is Thalia?"
Serendine's face remained placid. "Meyers, why haven't you killed her?"
The soldier named Meyers took in a shaky breath. "Lady Serendine, I—"
"Go ahead. Try." The beams spasmed, and the guards' screams grew louder. "Which do you think is faster? Your inborn magic or my magic tool? Now, take me to my sister before I kill every one of your pathetic friends."
"We can't let her in," Serendine said. "She's loyal to Barbarossa. We'll just have to take the losses."
Meyers hesitated. "She has my brother."
"Then you know the pain of having your sibling held hostage!" Kayra scowled. "Take me to Thalia!"
"Meyers," Serendine gave her a sideways glance. "When your brother joined these forces, he was prepared to throw away his life for Parthevia. Do it."
Meyers drew in a deep breath and raised her whip with a trembling hand. Closing her eyes, she prepared to deliver a blow. The screams grew more desperate as Kayra strengthened the intensity of her spell.
Sinbad fought back a tremor. He was about to witness another massacre. Did he have to tolerate this too? What was the point of being a king if he couldn't protect anyone?
No, he needed to take back control. Barbarossa's army was on the way, and if he was going to have a chance of coming out on top, every one of those soldiers would be necessary for the battle. As a merchant, he had managed to gain the upper-hand in hundreds of negotiations. Dealing with Kayra was no different.
"Hold on," Sinbad held up his hand. "I have no choice but to work with you, but I never agreed to let you call the shots, Serendine. I won't just let you do what you want anymore. Where is she?"
Serendine narrowed her eyes at him. "I still have Zepar inside your mind, you know."
How could he forget? Knowing that he had been violated in that way felt like he was covered with a layer of grime he could never wash off.
"I don't intend to run or hide. I can handle Kayra. Go back to the others and tell them we're going to fight."
Serendine drew up as though trying to appear taller. "Fine. Thalia and Ceylan are locked away in the central tower. It will be the safest part of the palace in the event of a siege."
Closing the tome, Kayra released the soldiers. Their armor clattered as they hit the ground. One by one, they sat up groaning. Sinbad let his shoulders slump just a little. It was a relief to see they appeared relatively unharmed and ready to fight.
As Serendine marched away, Kayra stormed up the stairs, her heels clomping hard with each step. When she reached Sinbad, she cast him a withering look. "If you think I will ever forgive you for dragging her into this situation…"
"Your fiance is on his way to kill everyone on this island including your sister," he reminded her sternly. "I don't think you want to toss around blame right now."
Sinbad pivoted and charged toward the center of the palace. There was no time for apologies. Surviving the oncoming war was his first priority. He would simply have to let Thalia and Kayra blame him for this mess and hope he could fix things later.
"He's not my fiance anymore," Kayra answered through gritted teeth.
Several guards had positioned themselves in front of the entrance. When they saw their king approaching, they exchanged glances before stepping aside. Sinbad heaved open a wooden door and marched up the winding stone staircase to the highest point in the palace. At the top, Falan and Judar were stepping out of one of the bedrooms.
"I wanna see Thalia," Judar whined. "Just let me peek! I wanna see if she's fallen into depravity yet!"
"That's enough." Falan clapped her staff to the ground firmly. They stopped arguing as they caught sight of Sinbad and Kayra.
"What are you two doing here?" he demanded. The guards positioned in front of the room across the hall snapped to attention, ready to obey his orders.
"I'm Serendine's magi." Judar waved his wand impatiently. "I'm here because I followed her. Are you an idiot?"
"Falan." Kayra slinked past Sinbad, her words slow and controlled. She raised the tome back to her stomach, preparing to open it. "What is your involvement in this mess?"
"We are simply collaborators who favor this change," Falan answered. "I am a royal court mage. Barbarossa's tyranny has turned this country into something terrible. I cannot stand by and allow that to happen."
Her matter of fact tone made her confession no less unsettling. She had been working with Serendine? Then, she had used him too? His jaw tensed until his teeth ground against one another. Was there anyone who wasn't part of this scheme?
"Please allow me to assist—"
He cut her off. "Do what you want. I don't have time for this. Where's Thalia?"
"In here, your Majesty." It was one of the guards that spoke. He stepped aside, unlocking the door before pushing it open. Sinbad motioned for Kayra to wait outside before turning his head to find his girlfriend sitting up straight on the edge of the bed. She stared at the doorway, unblinking, her lips pulled into a sour frown.
"Thalia," he acknowledged her. His voice came out more distant than he had intended.
Rising to her feet, she lifted her cold gaze to his. "Sinbad."
He swallowed. "About what happened earlier… I don't have time to explain, but later—"
"It better be a good explanation, Sin." She ran a hand through her hair and studied the carpet. "I keep trying to think of an explanation that makes sense. The only conclusion I've been able to come to is that you led me on with false promises of peace and hope, took my country and fucked me, then decided to show your true colors."
Her words stung. The idea that she would come to that conclusion so easily after everything they'd shared stabbed him like a knife in the chest. When had he ever given her reason to doubt him before today. Shouldn't she know him better by now?
"I would never—"
She didn't let him finish. "You think I'll lay down and take it, right? That I'm so desperate for companionship, I'll come crawling back no matter what you do?" Her voice caught in her throat. Her eyes were bloodshot, rimmed with smudged eyeliner. Her dress, which had looked so beautiful on his floor this morning, was filthy and torn in several places. Her voice and body trembled, and she looked as broken as he felt. He had to set things right. There was a war coming, and realistically, there was a strong chance they would die. If this was the last time he saw her, he wasn't leaving until he could burn her smile into his memory one last time.
"You really believe I've been faking this whole time?" He took a step toward her to embrace her, pausing when she wrapped her arms around herself and started pacing.
"You wouldn't be the first. I mean, look at me." She threw her arms up, gesturing to her disheveled state. "What would someone like you want with someone like me? I should have known it was too good to be true. I should have known—"
"I am looking at you, Thalia. I have been for a long time, and do you know what I see?"
She paused in her tracks, and he took the opportunity to close the distance between them. His hands lifted to smooth out her wild hair. "I see the girl who didn't hesitate to accept her childhood friend when she realized he had turned into a dragon." Next, his thumb worked to wipe the smudged kohl from her cheeks. "I see the girl whose cleverness saved me and dozens of other children." Her breathing hitched as he ran his fingers down her sides, gently tugging the wrinkles out her dress. "And today, I see a woman who's fought through wave after wave of defeat and never surrendered."
She averted her gaze. "They're beautiful words, but they're empty."
Even in the time he'd known her, Thalia had been burned and betrayed more times than Sinbad could count. Her wariness was far from unexpected, but it still stung.
"They're not." He stepped back to a respectful distance. "And if we survive this, I'll spend every day proving it. I'll start by instructing the guards to let you come and go freely. If you want to fight—" His voice caught in his throat. He couldn't finish the sentence. No matter how hard she'd worked over the last year, she wasn't ready for a war. Her eyes remained trained on the floor, and, unable to say anything more, he turned to leave. His boots clomped on the tiles, heavier with every step. The woman he loved no longer trusted him, and his country had been dragged into a war. She wouldn't stay here if she had a choice. He knew her well enough not to expect anything different. He was, in all likelihood, going to lose her. As his hand reached for the doorknob, her voice stopped him.
"Don't go."
He whirled around. He must have looked desperate, but he didn't care. They locked eyes, and he studied the worry lines that had etched themselves deeply into her brow. She opened her mouth to speak once more.
"I want to believe you that there's an explanation for all of this." Slowly, she approached him. "Even if there's not, even if this is all an act, I want to pretend just a little bit longer. If we never see each other again…" She placed her hand on his chest. Her fingers spread out over his thudding heart, and she tilted her head as though studying the way her palm fit flat against his ribcage. "I want you to tell me one last beautiful lie."
He gave a quiet, patient laugh. She was as stubborn as ever. "I can't lie to you, and you know it."
Her eyes drifted up his neck, tracing the line of his jaw before settling on his lips. She swallowed before confessing, "I know."
He didn't bother asking why she was struggling to believe him if that was the case. A part of him already understood, better now than ever. She was terrified of being wrong, of being caught off guard. Today's events had left her uncertain.
He leaned forward, and she pressed her mouth to his. The kiss was gentle. It lingered like the dying embers of a campfire, hot and red. It held the potential to set an entire forest ablaze, but it didn't. It died as they parted, leaving him cold and hollow. It had been a "good luck" and also a "goodbye."
"I should go," he whispered. "I love you."
She opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out but a strangled noise. Instead, she took his hand and squeezed. She loved him too.
