October 21, 1998
Calandra stepped out onto the street. Fresh air filled her lungs and different sights and smells assaulted her senses. All the different colors caused her to go dizzy. People bustled in front of her and her head swam with all the noise they made. She closed her eyes and focused her thoughts.
Her first thought was of him. Grey eyes and a mischievous smile flashed through her mind.
She needed to go find him. She had no idea where he was. Had no idea if the ministry was still tailing him, but she needed to find him. She thought for a moment then turned and walked down the alley by the hospital. She'd not tried apparition of more than ten feet in years, and she'd just now gotten the hang of that. She hummed and felt the buzz of her magic. She couldn't floo in, so it was this or walk. She'd take her chances.
Calandra walked to the corner and focused on the flat. She turned on her heel and the world spun. She stumbled a bit and looked down at herself. She no longer had her socks, and her hair was a few inches shorter than it had been, but everything else seemed to be in working order. She straightened herself and walked down the familiar road. She looked up at the window where she loved to sit and read. He probably wouldn't be there. She had no idea if all of their things were still there or not, but it didn't matter.
She climbed the stairs and walked up to the door. The paint was faded, and the door knocker was barely hanging on. She could tell there were charms on it, though she didn't know what kind. Perhaps Alice had found the flat. As soon as she found him and made sure he was safe, she'd go find Alice. She turned the knob, but it was locked.
"Alohamora." she whispered and heard a click.
She slowly turned the knob and the door swung open.
It all came flooding back.
Her eyes locked on small details as she took in the room. His old leather jacket flung over a kitchen chair; he'd always take it off as soon as he got in and come wrap his arms around her. Her slippers under the sofa where she'd toe them off and nudge her feet under his legs to get warm. Their books everywhere. Muggle mechanic books stacked with magical painting books, novels sitting next to spell books. That awful stuffed moose he'd won at the fair she'd taken him to when he wanted to know what a ferris wheel was. The constellation tapestry they'd smuggled out of his parent's house the night he snuck her in.
There was a thick layer of dust on everything, but there were footprints leading through it. They weren't fresh. They were covered over in more dust, as if someone had come through years ago and never returned. She followed the footprints to the bedroom. They stopped at the dresser. The top drawer had been left open. She peered inside and found herself looking at odds and ends of their life together. A spare quill, a pocket watch, the broken pieces of her mother's wand. She looked for the mirror she knew he kept there but didn't see it. The small mahogany box that he kept there was gone, too.
She pulled the drawer out a bit further and saw a remembrall, a sneakoscope, and the necklace he'd given her on her seventeenth birthday. She'd found out later he'd nicked it from his Father's vault; a Black family heirloom. They laughed about how angry it would make his mother when she found out. He'd given her a different one when they moved into the flat together and told her it was to replace the first one; something from him and him alone. It wasn't there.
She looked through the rest of the drawers and the nightstands but couldn't find the necklace. It was gone. Did he come back? Was he the one that took it? Nothing else had been disturbed, nothing else taken. Maybe he'd come looking for her. Her heart clenched.
She knew he wasn't here, but she still checked. She went from room to room opening every door as if it was a game of hide and seek and he was just waiting to jump out and scare her. But he wasn't there.
The rooms started to suffocate her. She had to get out. She wrenched open the door and walked back out into the sunlight. Calandra breathed deeply and pressed herself firmly against the brick wall of the building gathering her thoughts.
She'd come back and breathe in all the memories, but first she needed to find him. She left and headed to the decoy flat, but when she looked in the window, she saw a young couple there. It had been rented out or sold. She retraced the steps she'd taken the last night she went looking for him. His Uncle Alphard's property was still vacant. Peter's cottage was torn down, the cabin where the werewolves used to stay dilapidated.
She found herself wandering through the park close by the flat, unable to properly see anything, lost in thought. She sat on a bench and watched two children swing while their mothers pushed them. She caught tidbits of their conversation as she tried to put herself in his shoes.
"Like I tell my Mark, there's nothing like going home after a long day."
Where would he have gone?
"Too true."
Maybe he was still on the run.
"I tell you, Margaret, I used to hate it when I was a girl, but there's just something about that old place.
Perhaps she should try to reach out to Remus or Alice. She desperately wanted to see Alice. Maybe if she told them everything, they'd listen to her and-
Home.
The Potter's old place was sold long ago.
Home.
Did that mean? Would he have gone back there? He hated it, but there was a chance. Regulus was dead, so the house would go to him when his parents kicked the bucket. Maybe he went back there. Calandra stood up and held her shaking hands close to her chest. She had check. She walked back to the apparition point and stood there thinking. She knew how to get through the wards to his room, but they'd probably changed. She could always just go up and knock on the door, but what if his old bat of a mother was still around. She didn't need her sticking her nose in Sirius's business if he wanted by the ministry. No, she'd get in, check for him then get out.
Should she just take her chances with apparition? She chewed on her thumb then startled. Of course, the old vault. Orion didn't trust the Goblins as far as he could throw them. He had a few family vaults that connected to the townhouse. One led up to his study. It's how Sirius had snuck her in. Orion was dead, so his wards wouldn't be set, and she doubted that Walburga cared enough to set new ones. She was perfectly content with keeping her gold in Gringotts.
Calandra grinned. She had a way in.
She apparated out to Grimmauld place and walked down the alley behind it. She ducked under the fence and headed toward the maintenance entrance. The door was unlocked, so she went on in. Calandra walked to the back of the room and tried the door there; also unlocked. She slipped inside and walked down the narrow corridor, between pipes and cables, until she came to a small round porthole type object in the wall.
Calandra pressed her hand against it.
"Ouvert." She murmured.
The small opening widened and turned into an archway. Calandra ducked through it and walked through the dusty space to the door at the far wall. Black vines and branches covered the entire wall, but Calandra knew there was a door there.
She waved her hand and the branches pulled back, revealing a door with lots of tiny crystals imbedded in the stone surface. She smiled and tapped her finger to the crystals in a familiar pattern.
Orion.
One by one the crystals lit up, and when she tapped the last one the whole door glowed faintly. She heard a rumble and it slid to one side revealing a good-sized room filled with dusty objects. She didn't look around. There would be ancient Black Family artefacts, rolls of parchments, old paintings, stacks of books, and probably a good amount of gold.
She turned to her right and saw what she was looking for. The small crystal orb sat on a shelf among candles and teacups. She walked over to it and gazed inside. She focused her mind on the door she knew was in the room. The crystal ball started clouding, white smoke twisting and turning inside the orb, slowly taking the shape of the door. When the last tendrils of white settled in to form the bottom of the door, she heard a faint pop and smiled. When she turned back around to face the wall at the back of the room, the door had appeared.
"Just like old times," she said to herself as she opened the door and climbed the stairs behind it. She picked her way through the cobwebs and made her way up to a small opening in an otherwise smooth expanse of wall.
"Pouvior."
She muttered the words, confident that the password hadn't changed. Sure enough, a second later another constellation glowed on the square and she pushed it open.
She crawled out of the opening and found herself in an unfamiliar room. Maybe Sirius had come back. Where his father's desk had been now sat a small bed. The bookshelves had all been removed. The cabinet that used to stand there had been replaced with a small table. The dark curtains were gone, and in their place hung light yellow panels. The only thing that remained the same was the large painting of stars in the night sky that opened up to the passageway she'd just traveled through.
She stood in the room for a moment, taking it all in before she remembered why she was here. She roused herself and walked to the door leading to the hallway. She found herself in more familiar territory here. The wallpaper was the same gray and green as it always was. Same carpeting, too. She walked to the stairs and had just started to descend when she heard someone at the front door.
This was it. She'd finally get to see him.
She stopped a few steps from the front hall, waiting. The doorknob turned and she felt her heart clench. She held her breath and clasped her hands as the door swung open.
She caught a glimpse of familiar black hair, sticking up in every direction. The young man closed the door and shucked off his gloves, throwing them on the bench beside the front door. His glasses were a bit foggy and had slid down his nose.
"Jam-" she whispered, staring at him in confusion.
His head jerked up and he stiffened. His eyes met hers over those foggy glasses and she knew this wasn't James. Those weren't James's eyes.
Harry.
Of course, Sirius would've let Harry stay here. He'd probably given the house to him. He hated this old place and he'd fly to the moon for the boy. Harry looked at her with caution. She saw him grip his wand in his hand.
She cleared her throat and slowly held her hands up in front of her.
"I'm terribly sorry to intrude on you. I'm looking for someone who used to live here. I thought he might be here."
He didn't say anything, and she continued.
"I'm not going to harm you. I've not taken anything either, I promise. You can search me if you'd like."
He took a step toward her and looked at her curiously.
"How did you get in here?" he asked.
"There's a vault, with a passage that leads into the house. You can get to it through the constellation painting in the study." She answered, hands still in the air.
"I always wondered why I could never get that thing off the wall." He said with a half-smile.
She returned his smile and introduced herself.
"My name is Calandra White. It's wonderful to see you, Harry, although I'm sorry it had to be with me breaking into your home."
He cocked his head to the side.
"How do you know who I am?" he asked.
Calandra smiled sadly at him; this young man who didn't know her. Images of a little boy with bright eyes and a wide grin flashed in her mind.
"I was friends with your parents."
"Oh, right." he said, then looked at her kind of sheepishly. "You, err, you can put your hands down. I'm not going to hex you."
She laughed and lowered her hands. She stepped down the last few stairs and had to clasp her hands together to keep from embracing him.
"Harry, I really do want to sit and have a proper conversation with you, but I've been waiting years to see him, and I need to find him." her voice shook with emotion. "Can you please tell me where Sirius Black is?"
Harry looked absolutely thrown.
"What?" he asked.
"Please." she intoned. "He used to live here. I'm not looking to hurt him or to turn him in to the ministry or anything. I just want to see him."
He looked at her warily. Maybe he didn't know.
"Harry!" she said suddenly, gripping his arms. "Sirius did not betray your parents. He would've never done that to James. James was his brother. He-"
Harry gently cut her off.
"No, I know. I know he didn't do it."
His eyes danced across her face.
"Please." she pleaded, stepping back. "I promise, I mean him no harm. I'll make an unbreakable vow. I just want to see him."
Harry's gaze softened and he scratched his arm. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again.
Finally, his eyes met hers and he said, "I'm so sorry. But, Sirius. He's dead."
Her smile trembled. Her heart shattered into a million pieces. She shook her head. No. No. He couldn't be dead. Tears smarted her eyes and her hands shook. She'd made him promise not to die in there.
"You're wrong." she said.
She smiled through her tears and rushed on, "You're wrong. He escaped. He escaped. I know! I heard them say it myself."
She reached out to him again. "He got out. It's been five years now, but he got out of Azkaban!"
Her voice was hysterical, but she had to make him understand. Had to make him realize. Sirius wasn't dead. She had to find him.
Harry nodded his head slightly and held her arm gently.
"I know he escaped. He found me."
"Of course he did." she squeezed his arms. "He loved you. I knew he'd get out."
She looked into Harry's eyes and saw an overwhelming amount of sadness there.
"Please," she begged. "Please just tell me where he is. I don't care if he's married. It doesn't matter. I don't even have to speak to him. Please. Please just tell me where he is. Just show him to me. If I can just see him. Just see that he's happy, it'll be enough."
Her eyes pleaded with him. Her hands gripped his arms. She'd give anything if he'd just tell her how to find him.
"I'm sorry." He said. "I'm so sorry. He's gone."
She let go of his arms and stepped back.
"No." she said, her throat restricting.
"No. You're lying." She shook her head and felt tears on her cheeks.
He just softly shook his head.
"You're lying." She repeated.
She was so close to the edge.
"You're lying."
She saw him swallow and she fell down on the stairs behind her, holding onto herself to keep from falling apart.
"Please be lying," she sobbed. "Please. Please be lying. I'll do anything. I have gold. You can have it all. You can have everything. Please. Please. Please be lying."
He stepped towards her and laid hand on her arm.
"I wish I was," he said, his voice thick. "I wish I was."
Her whole world crumbled. She buried her face in her arms and bawled into them. She never wanted to get up from these stairs. She wanted to die right there. She heard the stairs creak and felt someone sit beside her. A hand patted her on the back.
He was gone. This was worth than death. This was a torture greater than the Cruciatus Curse. This was her worst nightmare. She'd never see him again. Never feel his hands run along her legs as they sat reading together. Never slip her fingers through his hair. Never feel his arms around her. Never feel his lips on hers. Never again.
She raised her head and saw Harry beside her, tears in his eyes.
"He loved you." she said. "So much. He was wrapped around your tiny little fingers."
Harry smiled.
"You'd sit on his shoulders and tangle your hands in his hair, and he'd laugh like it was the best thing in the world."
Harry swallowed and shifted on the step.
"Would you like a glass of water, or a cup of tea?"
"No, thanks." she said straightening up.
She'd been here too long. She needed to leave.
"I'll be on my way. I'm very sorry to have bothered you. It was great seeing you."
She stood and brushed away the tears in her eyes.
He stood with her and gave her an appraising look.
"We could have that chat now." He said conversationally.
"What?" she asked numbly.
"You said you'd love to have a proper chat with me." He nodded towards the kitchen. "We could talk over a cup of tea."
"I really don't want to bother you anymore." she said. "I've caused enough grief as it is."
He seemed a bit abashed when he looked back at her.
"You said you were friends with my parents. And you obviously cared for Sirius a great deal. I'd love to get to know you and to hear about them."
She smiled at him. Of course he wanted to know everything about them. His time with them all had been too short. Well, she could give him this. She stepped toward the kitchen and looked back at him.
"What do you want to know?"
"Everything." The word seemed to slip out of him before he could help it.
She laughed. "Let's get that tea then."
October 21, 1998
They sat at the table for hours. Tea service in front of them grown cold. Calandra explained to him how she met his parents. The first time she ever saw Sirius. Told him story after story of her interactions with them at school. Made him laugh with the antics they used to get up to. He had an easy laugh, much like his father, but reminded her overwhelmingly of Lily with the way he sat and listened to her.
She was telling him of the bet she made with Lily, when she kissed the giant squid. He laughed when she got to the part where the squid threw his mother back onto the bank by the lake.
"How did you win the bet?" he asked. "If the squid wouldn't let you all catch him."
"I learned a bit of Mermish sixth year, so I called down to the merfolk and asked them to tell the squid I just wanted to bestow a kiss on such a beautiful creature." She leaned her elbows on the table. "It rolled it's eye at us but gave me a tentacle."
He chuckled and pulled the tea tray in front of him. His eyes wistful and distant.
Without words to distract her the pain sliced through her again, cutting deep. She craved some sort of concrete connection to Sirius apart from this house and the ghosts of memories in the flat. She wanted to go to Azkaban and sit in his cell. Wanted to follow the same path he took when he escaped. Wanted to go to his grave; wanted any scrap of connection she could get to Sirius.
"Harry," she began tentatively. "Could you…that is…would you show me where he's buried?"
He winced
"I can't." he said. "There wasn't…He…We couldn't…couldn't bury him. There wasn't a body."
She swallowed and nodded sadly.
"Could you show me where he died?" she asked quietly.
He shot her an apprehensive look.
"I…I don't know." He said. "It happened in the ministry. In the department of mysteries. No one's really allowed down there. I can talk to Kingsley, see if maybe he'll let you…."
He trailed off and she gave him a half smile. She'd never get to see it. She should go. Go home to the flat one last time and soak it all in. Go see Alice one last time. She didn't know how she'd survive this.
Harry cleared his throat and spoke.
"Thank you. For telling me about them."
Her heart ached for him. She wished she could give him time with his parents, with Sirius, with all the people he'd lost.
"You're more than welcome, dear boy." She said, then a thought came to her. "I'll do you one better, too."
He cocked his head to the side, his brows furrowed in question.
"I'll give you my memories." She said.
His eyes grew round and he stammered. "No, you don't have to-"
She laid her hand over his.
"I've lived with nothing but these memories for the past seventeen years. I don't need them anymore."
She looked down at their hands then back up at her, eyes a bit wet.
"You'd do that for someone you just met?"
"For you, yes. But I met you a long, long time ago." She squeezed his hand. "I helped pick out your first broom."
He just sat there speechless, his eyes on their hands again. He grasped hers with his other hand and looked up at her eyes determined.
"I'll take you there," he said with resolve. "I'll take you to where he died. I'll convince Kingsley and figure out the red tape. Call in a few favors."
She shook her head.
"I didn't offer the memories for you to give me something in return. I offered them because you deserve to have every connection to the people you love."
"I know." he said. "Give me a couple days. I'll owl Kingsley tonight to get everything started." He patted her hand and stood up, taking the teapot and the tray over to the sink.
She couldn't find the words to thank him. Couldn't tell him what it meant to her. She'd have one more connection to Sirius. One more before she faded into oblivion like she knew she would.
She just watched him as he busied himself with the cups at the sink. He reached up to scratch his head, his hair sticking up in all directions. His glasses slid down his nose as he poured the tea down the drain and she was taken back to a different place and time.
A young man stood at the sink holding a bottle. His glasses had fallen down towards the end of his nose and he ran a hand through his messy hair. She was standing with her back to the counter and had her arms crossed over her chest, smirking at him fondly.
"You don't think this is too hot, do you?" he held out the bottle, his skinny wrist protruding from the sleeve of his sweater.
She leaned forward and pressed a hand against the bottle before taking it and saying, "James, you know you can check it against your wrist, right?"
She tilted the bottle and spilled a few drops on the inside of her wrist. Just warm; not too hot.
"Yeah, but I'm still always worried that it'll hurt him." He said anxiously.
"Just use a spell to maintain whatever temperature you want," she said handing the bottle back. "It's fine."
"I did use a spell." He shot back at her. "I just always double check."
"You mean quadruple check." she raised an eyebrow.
He shot her a glance then laughed at himself.
"Yeah, maybe."
She laid a hand on his arm and gave it a squeeze.
"You're doing great James."
He gave her a lopsided grin.
When she blinked James was gone. In front of her stood Harry, drying his hands on a tea towel.
October 21, 1998
Harry invited Calandra to stay at Grimmauld Place that night. With the sidelong glances he gave her, she suspected he wanted her around as a link to his parents and to Sirius. She couldn't blame him. Half the time she looked at him she saw James.
She'd readily accepted. Being alone in the flat was too much right now. She could go back during the day and walk through the rooms of her old life, but nighttime was different. She didn't think she could bear sleeping in that bed alone.
"I don't know which room you'd like." Harry said leading her up the stairs.
Calandra smiled. She had a feeling that the room she wanted was probably being occupied by Harry himself.
"Doesn't matter to me." she said following him up the hall and stopping outside the only room she was really familiar with.
"Well, I've moved most of the old stuff out of a couple of them." he said pointing to the door directly across from Sirius's old room and another up the hall.
"I've…er….put all my things in here." He pointed to the door to his right.
"Sounds wonderful." she smiled at him. "I'll bunk here for tonight. I can't thank you enough for your kindness."
"Don't mention it." He waved his hands shoved them in his pockets.
"Did you change it very much?" she asked.
"Yeah, I took loads of the furniture out." he said walking over and opening the door to the room she had chosen. "Everything was always so dark-"
"I meant that room." she pointed to Sirius's door.
"Oh." he said stepping back out of the room. "Err, no. Not really. I couldn't really bring myself to."
"You can come in and take a look if you like." he said and turned the knob.
She said nothing as she followed him into the room. She laughed when she took everything in. Pictures of her sixteen-year-old self in bikinis stared down at her, scattered among posters of motorcycles. She almost blushed but knew that to everyone else they'd look like Farrah Fawcet, Twiggy, and others. Alice had talked her into those. She clocked the bare spot where his favorite one had been. There was a ragged edge of white paper where it had ripped along one side. That had been the only one he'd brought with him when he left.
"They're…err…stuck on with permanent sticking charms." Harry said, nodding his head towards the walls.
"Of course they are." she shook her head.
She looked around the room. Red and gold shone back at her. She clocked a small bureau in the corner; a leather jacket laid carefully out on the top of it. The faces of his friends laughed all around her. She noticed that Peter Pettigrew had been removed from every picture. Scorch marks littered the photographs where he should've been. Realization dawned on her.
"It was him wasn't it?" she pointed to where Peter should've been standing in a picture. "He was the secret keeper?"
Harry nodded.
"Rat bastard." she muttered, thinking of Sirius sitting at the kitchen table trying to figure out the best way to keep his best friend safe. "I wish he'd have told me it wasn't him. I could've helped."
Harry just looked at her.
"I always thought that there was something wrong with the spell." She pursed her lips. "I thought Sirius was the secret keeper this whole time."
"You never doubted him?" Harry asked curiously.
"No." she said running a finger along a picture of Sirius and James. "James was his brother."
"Everyone else thought it was him." Harry said quietly. "They all thought he did it."
She gave him a soft smile.
"There's not a force on earth that could have made him betray your father. Trust me, I know."
She walked over and ran a hand across a different picture of James and Sirius, their arms flung around each other and goofy smiles on their faces.
"I offered to be secret keeper. I wasn't really a part of the Order. I never got to officially join." She said. "It might have been safer, with me not being affiliated with them. Or it might not have, without their protection, I don't know. But he refused. Wouldn't even tell James."
She stared at the boys in the picture. Sirius more handsome than a gangly fifteen-year-old should be and James shining with laughter.
"It was you wasn't it?" Harry asked.
She just looked at him, not knowing where he was going with his question.
"You were the reason. Why he joined the Order." Harry looked at her, then stared around the room she was soaking in.
"I couldn't imagine I was." she said with a laugh. "Sirius always had a bit of a penchant for danger. Loved the thrill of it. He didn't join the Order for me."
She smiled back at Harry and cocked her head towards the bureau with the leather jacket on it.
"Have you looked through it?"
He followed her eyes and nodded.
"Yeah, it was mostly clothes."
She grinned. "There's a secret drawer."
She crossed over to the bureau and ran her hand along the knobs. The face of a lion had been carved in each one.
"It's an undetectable extension charm hidden behind a few layers of enchantments." She chuckled to herself. "Sirius and James really were remarkable wizards. It's too bad they spent so much time in detention."
Harry smiled a lopsided grin and watched her trace her finger between the first and second shelves. She murmured the revealing spell and gave the password.
"Ringo." She said softly.
Before their eyes a second drawer squeezed directly below the top one. Harry's eyes widened and he stepped over to her. She twisted the small knob on the drawer until the lion was upside down and heard a click. She pulled open the drawer and was overwhelmed as the scent of cigarettes and caramel wafted up to her.
Harry peered down into the drawer. He lifted out a few scraps of paper.
"Concert tickets." he said, reading the faint type on them. "To a muggle band."
"Our first date." she smiled at the memory.
He looked back in the drawer. Stacks of envelopes sat bundled in twine, all with the same handwriting on them. He saw a golden wrapper to some sweet carefully smoothed out and laid on top of the letters. A small mahogany box sat inside; its lid propped beside it. Harry glanced up at her before reaching in and picking something out. He held up lock of violently purple hair.
"What's this from?" he asked.
She laughed. "From Sirius. I replaced his shampoo with a hair potion that turned his hair purple seventh year. He sulked for two days, but he got me back."
She reached into the drawer and searched around, if he kept his he probably had hers, too. She pulled out another lock of hair and handed it to him.
"He turned mine green."
Harry laughed at the bright glaring lock of hair. He carefully folded them up and laid them back in the drawer. He pushed a few more scraps of paper out of the way and picked up two pictures. One was a muggle photograph of two people smiling toward the camera. Sirius as handsome as he'd ever been. His dark hair falling down past his ears and his gray eyes flashing. His cheek was pressed against a young woman's head. She was beautiful; smiling and glowing and happy. Her hair cascaded in waves down her shoulders.
The other was a magical photograph. The same couple were sitting in what looked to be the Gryffindor common room. They were laughing together with their heads close to one another. The young man reached out a hand and tucked a strand of hair behind the girl's ear and she put her hand up to his and looked up into his eyes. They were oblivious to the fact they'd been photographed.
Harry stared at the photographs before clearing his throat and handing them to Calandra.
She just stared at the pictures. She thought he'd gotten rid of them after he left. Getting rid of evidence. Trying to cut her out of his life to keep her safe. Where had he hidden them all that time?
She looked up when she heard Harry give an embarrassed cough. His eyes quickly moved from the corner of the drawer to the ceiling. She peered into the drawer towards the spot his eyes had been and snorted.
Red lace lay folded up. She went back in time to the night she wore them.
"I'm keeping these." Sirius said resolutely, grabbing her underthings and tossing them in the drawer.
"Excuse me!" she said, laughing and wrapping a dressing gown around herself. "Those are mine and you've no right to them."
"Not anymore, love." he said.
He wrapped his arms around her and looked down at her.
"Besides, I think I earned them." He winked at her and she threw her head back in a laugh.
Oh Sirius.
She reached in and moved her bra and underwear to the side and lifted out the blue jeans beneath them.
"I left a change of clothes here." she said, trying to relieve some of the boy's embarrassment. "In case I ever got to come back. I never did. He left home about a week after."
"He went to your dad's house." She said looking up at Harry.
His head bobbed up and down.
"Yeah, I know. He told me."
"I'd have given James all the gold in my father's vault for getting him out of that house, if he would've taken it." She admitted.
"Not that he needed it." she'd added.
"He hated it here." Harry agreed. "But he ran away, my dad didn't get him out?"
"Oh, Sirius left on his own alright. But James had been offering for years for Sirius to live with him. Offered to pack up for him and everything so he wouldn't have to come back. He always gave him the option."
"Why'd he stay so long?" Harry wondered aloud.
"He'd never say. Didn't even tell James as far as I know. But if I had to wager a bet, I'd put my money on Regulus." She folded the jeans and put them back in the drawer, suddenly exhausted.
"I think I'll head to bed, now." She said and gave Harry a smile.
"I can sleep in one of the other rooms." he said softly. "If you want to stay in here and look through the rest of it."
He nodded at the bureau.
She looked around the familiar room and shook her head. He should stay here, his time with Sirius had been far shorter than hers.
"That's ok." she said. "There's too many memories here."
