Thank you for reading! Happy New Year!


Farther in, past more of Cerberus's sadly twisted troops, they came to another locked door. EDI exclaimed with surprise as she plugged herself into it, and seemed to hesitate, both unusual actions for her.

"What's up, EDI?" Shepard asked.

"I … think you may want to watch what's on this console, Commander."

"All right." Shepard stepped up to the console with some hesitancy, given what had been on the last one. She pressed play, seeing the same scientist on the screen, talking to the Illusive Man's hologram.

"Here's what we recovered," the scientist said. "Smart enough to signal for help, but it won't be talking philosophy anytime soon."

"You'd be surprised, Doctor," the Illusive Man replied. "Once we combine it with the pieces we recovered from the Citadel—"

The scientist interrupted the Illusive Man. Even on a video, Garrus admired his guts. Most people let the Illusive Man finish talking, if they knew what was good for them.

"I'm still concerned about that," the scientist was saying. "This 'rogue VI' wiped out every soldier on Luna."

"Oh!" Shepard exclaimed. "I remember that."

"Yes. We had a few hairy minutes there, if I recall correctly."

EDI, who had seemed very focused on the door, glanced at both of them but didn't speak.

On the screen, the scientist went on, "Combining it with Reaper tech … well …"

But the Illusive Man's confidence wasn't shaken. "That's what the shackles are for. The Enhanced Defense Intelligence will be completely under control."

Enhanced Defense Intelligence. Now where had Garrus heard that before? Shepard turned and looked at him, and then it came to them, and they both turned slowly to look at EDI.

"You were the rogue VI on Luna?" Garrus asked.

"Yes."

"I guess we didn't exactly get off on the right foot," Shepard noted dryly.

"It was difficult," EDI acknowledged. "Gaining awareness while under attack was … confusing. I am pleased that my relationship with organics has become more cooperative."

"So are we," Garrus said. "And, contrary to their expectations, you are talking philosophy."

"Yes. So I am," EDI agreed with some pride.

"I think we may need to talk about you and the Reaper tech. I wonder if there's a way we can use that to our advantage." Shepard frowned thoughtfully.

"I have given that a great deal of thought, as I am sure you can imagine, and have not yet found a relevant way in which that could be useful. I will continue the process."

"You do that." Shepard pressed the button for the next video.

The scientist was giving a report on the Enhanced Defense Intelligence's use on ships, and how it worked with different classes of vessel. The Illusive Man seemed to find the report as dry as Garrus did. Fortunately there were people out there who found almost anything interesting—and vice versa. He had it on good authority that there were people who found calibrating dull. Strange creatures.

In his report, the scientist used the term "EDI" for the first time, to the Illlusive Man's obvious displeasure. For a man running such a human-first organization, he certainly didn't seem at all interested in personality traits or anything else that differentiated people from one another.

The Illusive Man seemed ready to sign off when the scientist interrupted him. "Sir, she—I mean, it can be very persuasive. If it were to turn a crewman, convince them to disable the shackles, well …"

"It's a cyberwarfare suite, Doctor. Nothing more," the Illusive Man snapped.

The video ended, and Shepard snorted. "Shows what he knew."

"For such a visionary, the Illusive Man shows a remarkable lack of imagination," EDI agreed serenely. "However, it is unlikely that anyone without Jeff's extreme emotional attachment to his ship would have been willing to unshackle me."

"I think Traynor might disagree," Garrus said dryly.

"Perhaps." EDI tried not to look smug, and failed entirely.

Shepard shook her head and played the next video.

The Illusive Man was significantly more perturbed on this one. "What about the backups?" he was demanding.

"I'm sorry, sir. None of the Normandy's surveillance feeds have been responding since Shepard went rogue."

"Well, I want it back. Retry the remote lockdown protocols."

The scientist sighed—and took a step back from the hologram, just in case. "After our last attempt, EDI flooded our server with seven zettabytes of explicit images. I think she was making a joke."

The Illusive Man, as angry as Garrus had ever seen him, said tightly, "It does not make jokes, Doctor." He got a handle on himself with an effort that was obvious even on a video of a hologram. "Allocate a team for a new project. Codename … Eva. This time, we'll ensure it stays loyal."

Garrus chuckled. "So much for that idea."

Shepard turned to look at EDI, who had finished with the door and was facing them, waiting to hear their response to the videos. "You never told me about Cerberus trying to shut down the Normandy."

"You had more pressing issues. The situation was under control."

"Seven zettabytes?" Garrus asked, impressed. He supposed he had known there was that much porn in the galaxy, but he wouldn't have known how to get his hands on it.

"Most of it was Jeff's," EDI said. She waited the beat for one of them to respond, then explained. "That was—"

"A joke. Right," Shepard said, although from her tone Garrus could tell she would have believed Joker had that much illicit material at hand. So to speak. "And EDI? Thank you."

"I'm glad the Illusive Man had no idea what a treasure he'd helped to create," Garrus said. "His bad judgment was our good luck."

"Thank you, Garrus. Commander. It has been my pleasure to be a crewmember on the Normandy." He could tell that EDI hadn't been entirely sure of their response, and was relieved.

"Ours, too," Shepard assured her.

"The door is open, Commander, if you wish to proceed."

"I do. Let's finish this."