Chapter Seventy-Four
Beau and Abel sat quietly on trunks in the back of the wagon along with Lo, who, about halfway between the Lake House and Reno, offered the boys slices of an apple he was cutting for himself. Each took a slice, and as soon as it was in their mouths, their faces twisted at the sourness.
"Mr. Lo, how do you eat these without making a face?" asked Beau. He marveled at the smile that appeared on Lo's face, considering he'd never seen Lo smile.
"Lo learn to eat what he have. Not waste anything."
Beau nodded, and continued, "But you don't have to worry about that here. I've heard Mom tell you to eat what you want."
Adam and Ben had been listening to the conversation in the back. Ben leaned toward Adam. "I didn't know he'd taken to calling her Mom."
Smiling, Adam said quietly, "I didn't either."
The train ride from Reno to Sacramento was quiet. Beau's attention was in another of Adam's books. Even Adam and Abel's play was quiet until they reached the tunnels where Abel glued himself to the windows and remained standing at the window until they were well past the trestles.
When Abel fell asleep, Adam left him with Beau and walked out to the deck of the car, leaned back against the back wall and watched the world go by. He wasn't really watching. He was already remembering his goodbye to Shiloh when the thought of grabbing her hand and pulling her off the car just before her fingers slipped away briefly crossed his mind.
Taking a deep breath, he knew the house at the stock ranch was going to be awfully quiet for whatever time it took to settle his business in San Francisco. One thing he was sure of. Abel had never been separated from his mother for so long. It was going to be hard to keep his mind off of what he was missing. Hopefully, he would be able to spend most of his time with Robbie.
Adam knew he could have made things easier for himself if he had married a woman who had no aspirations other than taking care of her husband and their children…a woman who needed to be taken care of. But in that same minute of thought, he knew he would be missing the excitement…the challenge…the physicality that came with a highly educated woman, and part of that was her confidence in what she chose to do. Admittedly, Shiloh almost fell apart after a debut. She was her own worst enemy, but then she marched on and eventually gained confidence in what she produced. If he had been a single man, watching her over and over again, he knew he'd have felt the same way he had after her first appearance in San Francisco was over when they were alone in her dressing room and almost shared their first kiss. He was more than proud of her. Each and every performance he witnessed made him want her more than ever.
He smiled, then laughed to himself. After Abel came, then Aaron, and then Anna, he realized he loved her as much for the way she loved their children, giving each one her undivided attention when necessary, or gathering them up together, teaching them, singing to them, reading to them, loving them as only a mother could.
Realizing it was going to be difficult to keep his mind on his work, he resolved to do whatever possible to limit their time apart, even if he had to give in once in a while and follow her. His business was important to him and important to his partner, but Shiloh was more important. He'd try his best to make sure they were never apart again.
The train whistle brought him out of his musings. Looking up and around the car in front of him, he could see the last curve of the track that would bring them into the station at Sacramento. He opened the door of the car and found Abel leaning against his older brother while his brother had laid the book over his face with his head so far back, Adam knew he'd have a cramp in his neck. Slightly shaking Beau, he said quietly, "Hey, you two. We're in Sacramento. Gather your things."
Beau jerked awake, shaking Abel, who, forgetting where he was, sat down on the floor of the railcar and whimpered until his father lifted the little boy into his arms.
Rubbing his back as he'd seen Shiloh do, Adam whispered to Abel to calm him down. "Wake up, little man."
"I wan' Mama," the child quietly cried.
"We're on the way to San Francisco, remember?" said Adam quietly.
Abel raised his head and looked around him. He sniffled once, then nodded, pushing away from his father to be let down. Once his feet were on the floor, he gathered his belongings, but made sure his hand was in his father's as they walked out of the railcar.
Adam had booked them on the Chryssie, as usual. The Chrysopolis was the cleanest and most comfortable of all the steamers traveling between Sacramento and San Francisco. The steamer also had the best spread where food was concerned, and Captain Foster knew the Cartwrights well, so they were always well cared for.
At dinner in the evening while the Chryssie steamed over the languid waters of the Sacramento, the Captain entertained the Cartwrights with steak, oysters, fried chicken, bread so soft it melted along with fresh butter in your mouth, all manner of vegetables and delectable desserts.
Abel filled himself to the brim with one of the desserts, a pastry filled with cinnamon and apples and drizzled with honey.
Adam had to carry him to their stateroom where he took Abel straight to bed. Even though the child was still awake, he rolled somewhat lazily from side to side with his eyes only half open and his belly round and tight.
"We won't tell Mama how you made a pig of yourself tonight," said Adam as he pulled his son's trousers off, followed by his shirt.
"I don' feel good, Pa," Abel said quietly, knowing his father would be angry with him after being told not to eat too much. "But I really like the biscuits."
"They weren't biscuits, Abel, and you knew it when you ate the second one…and the third one. Now, I'm leaving wash basin here by the bed if you get sick. If I don't get to you before it's too late, try to hit the bowl. Give me a kiss." Abel did so and moved to his pillow as his father pulled his covers over him. "Try to stay under the blankets. It gets cold on the river at night." Leaning over, Adam kissed his son's forehead.
"I love you, Pa," said Abel. "You gonna sing to me like Mama?"
Adam snorted. He began to hum Amazing Grace in that deep baritone of his, but before he got through the first stanza, Abel was lightly snoring.
Leaning against the door, listening, Beau said, "Why don't you want to sing with Shiloh? You'd make quite couple…on stage, I mean."
Adam pointed Beau through the bedroom door of their stateroom, closing it behind him. "Did Shiloh put you up to this?"
"No, she didn't say a word about it to me, but it's obvious it means a lot to her."
Walking into the sitting area of their suite, Adam motioned Beau to a chair, then took a seat in the opposite chair. "I don't want to sing."
"Even when it means so much to her?"
"Even so. First, I don't have the time it takes to even prepare much less perform almost every night, and then follow her to another city and do it all over again. Slater and Cartwright is growing by leaps and bounds, and if I'm absent, it won't. Because I'm the only engineer in the firm, it would affect a lot of people to whom I've made a commitment. Shiloh will have to understand and accept that."
Beau took a deep breath, pursed his lips and looked away.
Adam sat back and crossed his arms, watching for whatever was coming next. "Spit it out, so we can put this behind us."
"You made a commitment to Shiloh first. As I understand it, you sealed the deal with Slater on your honeymoon."
Now, it was Adam's turn to become silent, but only for a moment. "So, you have spoken to Shiloh."
"No, I haven't. I haven't said a word to her about any of this. But I have asked questions of other people. You once said she knew what she was getting into. I have to disagree. She didn't know anything about the Slaters until after you were married. It was supposed to be a surprise for her. Somehow, I don't think that's the way she feels about it." Beau watched his father's nostrils flare. He closed his eyes, mustering up the fortitude to continue. "Shiloh reminds me of my mother a bit. Mother was a strong woman, but she was held back…because she was protecting me…and you. You didn't try to see her after she asked you to leave even though you had to know I was a possibility." Both men held each other's tense gaze. "I'm not blaming you, Pa. Even if you had come back just to find out, she would still have sent you away…and probably in the cruelest way possible. There was your youth. But in this case, you're the older one…the one who's supposed to be responsible. You have Shiloh considering ending her career. Is that what you want?"
"No." Adam growled. Standing up from his chair, he paced the floor before he halfway sat on the edge of a side table. "Beau, I know you're fond of her…"
"Would you expect less of Abel in defending his mother if he were older? She is my mother now. I love her like a mother. She reminds me of my own. I've seen another version of what I'm seeing now, and both versions involve you."
"Shiloh knew I had commitments…regardless of Slater, there are commitments to the ranch. Either way, I contribute to the success of it. With Slater and Cartwright, it's more planning…and building…and investing money where Hoss and Joe invest time. Both are equally valuable. Without Slater, I would be investing an equal amount of time which means I wouldn't always be traveling with Shiloh. This particular problem has nothing to do with being together. I wouldn't be singing with her even if I was in New York for her entire schedule."
"What if you could sing with her…just once or twice without anyone but her…and me…knowing who you are?"
Moving his eyes up to the ceiling of the stateroom, Adam said, "And just exactly how would I accomplish that?"
Beau's edge showed just a bit in the upward curve of one side of his mouth. "By wearing a theatrical mask."
"And just how am I supposed to learn the music?"
"It was Maguire's orchestra she practiced with," said Beau. "He's in San Francisco now. And you are, at least, a little familiar with the song as I understand it, so it wouldn't take you much time."
Adam smiled, though his smile was tinged with aggravation. "So, you think you've got it all figured out."
Beau shrugged. "I'm just pointing out a problem I see coming," he said as he stood. "You're the one who needs to figure it out." Turning toward his bedroom, Beau said, "Good night."
The next thing Beau heard was a light knock on his door followed by a ray of light. "Beau, time to get up. We're at the dock."
Beau nodded, swung his feet over the side of the bed and began to dress while Adam woke Abel and got him dressed. Beau and Adam walked down the gangplank, with Abel's head on Adam's shoulder. They walked silently to a wagon that was already being loaded with their luggage and were soon off to the stock ranch.
Having arrived on a Sunday, the Cartwright men would be able to get some rest before business began. While Beau and Abel slept in late, Adam was up before first light, heading out to the barn where Clarence had a horse ready for him.
"Where's the herd?" Adam asked as he mounted the horse.
"They're about a mile out. Pete decided he needed to give the grass near the house a break," answered Clarence. "You're awfully quiet, Boss."
Adam puckered his lips and looked down at the reins in his hand. "Lot's to think about, Clarence. And, I have to shift my thinking before going into the office tomorrow."
"Swap steers for buildings?"
Grinning, Adam said, "Something like that," before he moved his horse down the track to the main road.
