Chapter Seventy-Eight

Shiloh sat quietly at a newly glassed window, staring out at the night. She could see the lay of the land, the plains and the buttes rising from them standing almost black against a dark blue sky strewn with stars. Other than silhouettes, there wasn't much to see. It didn't matter. She saw the beauty of the darkness only a moment before it all disappeared, even though her eyes were still watching.

"What if?" she thought. Sucking in a shuddering breath, she allowed a tear to fall. She had not wanted Amalee or her children to see just how upset she really was, so she waited for everyone to go to bed to think about what might have happened. At first, she felt anger. The children's father should have been there to defend them. Instead he'd been satisfied with Pinkertons. Had he even considered how such an attack would frighten them, if not left them injured or captured…or dead? She swallowed a sob and swore as she rose from her chair and began pacing from one side of the car to the other, looking out the windows as she made her turn back to the window on the opposite side. Somewhere in the middle of her back and forth journey, she stopped and hung her head at the thought that even if Adam had been there, it wouldn't have made a difference. She'd be loading rifles, if he'd allowed it, while he would be defending the railcar, and Amalee and the children would've been exactly where they were.

She'd seen Indians on the warpath before. This time, there were too many to fathom. If Adam had been here, he might have been injured…or killed.

Taking a deep breath, she resolved to move on as best she could. She opened the rear door of the car and stepped out onto the deck to take in the air, but briefly yipped at the man standing in front of her.

"Mrs. Cartwright, you ought not be outside your car at night. If you slipped and fell off the train, no one would know until the morning."

She recognized the Pinkerton as the man who had taken her mail to the post office and who had told her it was all over with the Indians. She looked wearily up at him and quietly chuckled. "You just might be the one falling off the train. You had quite a busy day today yourself."

He smiled and leaned back against the wall of the car. "I got some sleep earlier."

"I don't think I'll sleep at all tonight," she said. "The Indians are still coming at us when I close my eyes."

"I wouldn't have expected that from you. Mr. Crocker told me you're a very capable woman…with horses and with guns. From what I saw, I believe him."

"Mr…uh?" When he wasn't forthcoming with a name, Shiloh smiled. "I can't keep calling you Mr. Pinkerton. If there's more than one of you around, it will be confusing, don't you think?"

"Douglas Allen."

"Well, Mr. Allen, I do train fine horses, and I can shoot a rifle pretty well, and I'm as comfortable in a pair of trousers as I am in a dress…as Shiloh Cartwright. I'm afraid people who only know me as Isabella Whitney just wouldn't understand, and I think at the moment, I'm thought of more as Isabella than Shiloh. Appearances, you understand."

Mr. Allen crossed his arms. "Somehow, I don't think Shiloh Cartwright really cares that much about appearances. I can assure you I saw Shiloh Cartwright loading rifles and picking Indians off their horses if they rode too close to a window."

"I was defending my children and their nanny. A mother can become quite brutal when it comes to the welfare of her children. But I'm on my way to New York and Boston to perform. Those people will never get to meet Shiloh, I promise you."

"I highly doubt that. The stronger personality generally wins."

Cutting her eyes up to his, she said, "And just why would you think Isabella doesn't have a solid nature? She's not frail. She knows exactly what she wants, and she doesn't take guff off anyone. She'll sting you with polite words, but you'll still be left smarting." Walking back to the door, she stopped before she opened it and turned around. Very calmly she said, "I spent a good bit of my life thinking I was two different people. I'm not. I express myself in two different ways with the same passion, just a different bearing."

"I suppose that's what makes you a good actress," he said with a slight smile.

She snorted. "Too bad. I don't think I want to be an actress. Goodnight, Mr. Allen," she said, leaving him with a smile.

The next morning, Shiloh woke up and looked out one of the holes that had not yet been covered in glass. "This must be North Platte. Civilization. And glass for the rest of the windows." She nodded and turned back around to wake Aaron. She could hear Amalee and Anna 'talking' about breakfast. The train would be stopped in North Platte until the following day in order to make permanent repairs to the rail cars, so she decided to treat the children to a day outside the car…first breakfast in a restaurant followed by a trip to a toy store, then to play in a park. She stopped to think. Every city…town has a park. I'm sure there's a park here…somewhere."

XXXXXXXX

When Robert, Adam and Beau arrived at the Slater's home for the evening, Evelyn met them in the foyer with a finger perpendicular to her lips. "The boys have worn themselves out. They're both asleep."

Adam's brows furrowed while his lips curled into a slight smile. "Evelyn Slater, this is my son, Beau." He moved on quickly to his next comment. "It's going to be hard for Abel to sleep in the buggy."

"Then don't take him home. Let him stay the night," said Evelyn with a wide smile. "It's been very entertaining to have both boys in the house all day." She extended her hand. "Beau, it's very nice to meet you." When she glanced at Robert, who slightly shook his head, she said no more.

Adam's lower jaw had dropped, but turned into an expectant smile as he looked from Evelyn to Robert and back. "Does that mean there could be another in your future?"

"Good heavens, no," said Evelyn, her eyes boring into Adam's. "I'm too old to be thinking about another. It's just that Robbie is so comfortable with Abel." Evelyn's arm wound around Adam's as she walked him into the sitting room. "Can I get you a drink?"

"We should be going. It's a long way back to the stock ranch, and I'll have to get Abel fed before he goes to bed," said Adam.

"Then I'll say it again. Leave him here. He'd be here tomorrow during the day anyway. I wouldn't be surprised if neither of them wakes up until the morning."

"If it's not too much trouble," said Adam, pinching the rim of his hat.

Evelyn tried not to smile, but wasn't successful. "It's delightful to see Robbie so…happy… with Abel. It's as if they were brothers."

"All right, then. He can stay," said Adam. "Robert, we'll see you bright and early tomorrow."

The buggy ride was quiet through San Francisco until the road opened up to the countryside.

"Adam, would you mind if I stayed at the ranch tomorrow? I think I'd like to do some exploring," said Beau as he looked around him. They area was more open, the land more flowing than on the Ponderosa. It reminded him of the countryside, the farms and the salt smell in the air outside Boston.

"Won't you be bored?" asked Adam as he glanced at Beau, then looked to the horses.

"I was hoping I could take a ride around the ranch."

Adam pushed his bottom lip up at the same time he nodded. "I can arrange that. There's not much of a chance you'd get lost. There's only one road that goes north and south, and the area is wide open." He shook his head. "But other than ranch work, there's not that much to do. You'll be bored. On the other hand, you can go back to the office with me and …study. You've been picking up quite a bit just listening. Any possibility of an interest in architecture?"

Shrugging, Beau said, "Perhaps. What does Shiloh do when everyone's here with you?"

"She has a piano, and she brings some horses with her. Sometimes she's preparing a few performances."

"And the children?" asked Beau.

"Amalee keeps them busy," said Adam. "But there will come a time when they'll be bored if they don't take to ranch work." Looking at Beau and back to the horse, Adam studied him. "Are you bored?"

Beau laughed. "Maybe a little. I miss…the family…together. The children…Shiloh…you and Shiloh. Grandpa. Everyone."

"You need to give some thought about what you want to do when we leave San Francisco. Shiloh would love you to be there with the rest of us. And…ah…" Adam leaned toward Beau. "Your grandfather will be joining us in New York at some point."

Beau's head snapped back at Adam.

"Don't let that slip when you see Shiloh. It's supposed to be a surprise." After a shared smile, Adam said, "Think about what you want to do tomorrow. I'll be leaving early. I'm taking Albert and his engineer back to the courthouse to go over what needs to be done. I hope to be leaving for New York in a couple of weeks."

"Why wait?" asked Beau.

"Because I have to draw plans to fix the building. It has to be approved by the Mayor and the city council before the men can start work."

Twisting his mouth and nodding, Beau turned away and looked out at the rising shadows. They were still half an hour from the house, and the light was already starting to fade. He knew Adam was right about being bored at the stock ranch with nothing much to do but ranch work. He wasn't averse to ranch work. On the Ponderosa, he enjoyed it, but that was because he worked with men he knew. He didn't know anyone here. "I'll go back into the city with you. I think I'd like to go with you to the courthouse while you're speaking with Mr. Kelley. I figure I need to make a decision about what I want to do sooner than later."

Adam curled his brows as he glanced at his son. "There's no rush."

"I know, Pa, but I can't continue to tag along with you or…Mom."

Bowing his head, Adam grinned. "I think I can speak for Shiloh. Neither of us mind."

Beau smiled. "I know. But I need to do something to contribute. Like you said, the Ponderosa is a working ranch, and everyone contributes in some way. Having said that, besides watching you do what you do here, how would I learn to be an architectural engineer?"

"You already know."

"I do, but I want to hear the details from you…because you've already done it."

"It's going to take three or four years at Harvard, depending on what you know before you go and how quickly you pick up the rest. You won't be alone for most of it. We've already sent one man to Harvard on a scholarship," Adam said as he turned the horses into the track to the house.

"Really? Who?" asked Beau, almost excitedly.

"William Anthony. He's been there a year, so you'll be behind him, but by the time he leaves, you should have your feet under you. He's only a little older than you."

"How do I learn some of this before I go to Harvard." He quickly added, "If I go."

Adam nodded and pushed his bottom lip up. "For the moment, you pay attention. There's really no time to get you started before we have to leave for New York. But once we're back, you'll be spending time with me…and Bart and Terry. And reading about Greeks and Romans. Besides you have several choices. You can stay on the ranch. There's no shame in doing ranch work. It's good hard work, and if that's what you decide to do, you'll also learn the business end of it. You'll learn how to run it. But that would mean you'd be staying on the Ponderosa."

"Is that bad?" asked Beau.

Laughing, Adam said, "Not at all. But you'll be in one place. You won't be travelling much."

"I was in one place until I came here, so I don't see a problem." His head bounced. "And the horses are there, too."

"True enough. That's another possibility. And then, there's music," said Adam.

"I don't know about that."

"Well, be prepared," said Adam, smiling. "Shiloh will try to pull you in."