The Emperor's New Clothes

"I don't want to live..." Obi-Wan's cry seemed to hang in the air long after he'd been carried from the chamber.

Buffy stood with her back against the wall as the service droids moved around her, taking away the bodies of the fallen Jedi. Her mind continued replaying those last few moments with Obi-Wan over and over again. She relived her own desperate attempt to draw on the Force to heal him, the heady sensation as a wild energy buzzed through her, and her elation at having finally made that connection to the Force. She'd been so wrong.

Had she tapped into her Slayer powers and attempted to transfer the accelerated power of healing into him? Or had something more sinister happened when she lost control? She'd known Sineya was interested in Obi-Wan, after all, she'd called him hers, but Buffy had always thought that was because he'd appeared in the Slayer desert dressed as the Cheeseman.

Now, she wondered if Sineya could have tried turning Obi-Wan into a Slayer.

"Please... I can't... take any more. Don't make me..."

Obi-Wan couldn't be a Slayer. He wasn't a potential or a young girl, and this wasn't even her dimension. But if that is what had happened, it was no wonder the pain had been unbearable. Qui-Gon's expression of revulsion and disgust floated in her mind. Obi-Wan's old master hated her, she felt sure of it.

She was so lost in thought that she didn't notice the man enter the room. It wasn't until he stood directly in front of her and placed a hand onto her shoulder that she looked up. Count Dooku's lined face regarded her kindly, dark eyes brimming with concern.

"Qui-Gon and Quin have left for the Temple with Obi-Wan," he said, in his deep, velvety baritone. "Qui-Gon was most distraught. What happened? I was there when Palpatine stabbed Desolate, but then my fight took me out into the corridor. Did Palpatine serve the same trick twice?"

"It was... me," Buffy's voice cracked. Unable to meet his eyes, she dropped her gaze to the floor. The bodies had gone, but the cleaning droids had yet to appear and clear away the ash and smears of blood. "I did it."

The Count patted her shoulder. "Ah, I quite understand. Obi-Wan is one of the most irritating men I've ever met and I've often wanted to drive my lightsaber through him. It doesn't surprise me in the least that you attempted to kill him."

Aghast, Buffy looked up sharply. "I didn't...I never..." The denial died away on her lips when she realised he was being sarcastic. He knew she hadn't stabbed Obi-Wan.

"Alright, it wasn't me that stabbed him," she amended, begrudgingly. "During the fight I got distracted. Obi-Wan threw his lightsaber at a vampire behind me and Sifo-Dyas snuck up and stabbed him in the back-."

"It's hardly your fault," murmured Dooku soothingly. Although they lacked a padawan and master bond, he'd felt her despair long before entering the room. He regarded her thoughtfully, taking in the whiteness of her face and the deep purple shadows beneath red-rimmed eyes. It seemed to him that Palpatine's bite had weakened her physically and Obi-Wan's injury had diminished her spirit.

A rare surge of warmth and compassion rose up in him. Embarrassed by the strength of his emotions, Dooku gave a repressive cough, and added gruffly, "Kenobi should have realised that the Sith are a bunch of back stabbers, if he'd-"

Buffy shook her head. "No, there's no one to blame but me. If I hadn't distracted him he'd still be here. It was my fault that he-"

"No it wasn't!" Dooku gave her a little shake, his face stern. "If Kenobi was injured saving someone else, would you blame them for it?"

Buffy pouted and looked mutinous.

Dooku took that as a yes, and tied a different tactic. "He's a trained Jedi knight. As a member of the Order, Obi-Wan has always known the risk the position involved."

"You don't know what I did to him later." Buffy spoke so quietly that the Count needed to strain to hear her. "I didn't want him to die." She looked up, wanting him to understand her side of the story, desperate that he wouldn't be as revolted by her as Qui-Gon.

"I asked Qui-Gon to use the Force to heal him but he said it was beyond his ability. Obi-Wan was slipping away... I tried to use the Force...it..." Her control slipped, and a fresh tear trickled down her cheek. She roughly brushed it away, and swallowed, determined not to let the sobs take over. "It... didn't go right."

Count Dooku shot a furtive glance at the corridor. No one was around. He pulled Buffy to him and hugged her awkwardly. It had been a long time since he'd held a woman in his arms and, in those days when he'd been quite popular, he'd always done his utmost to avoid the emotional ones.

Buffy continued talking, her voice was more muffled due to her face being pressed against his chest. "Something happened. Something that's never happened before. My inner Slayer took over and there was... this energy. It went into Obi-Wan and he started screaming." Buffy lifted her head and stared at the Count grimly. "Please, you've got to believe me. I never wanted to hurt Obi-Wan, I just wanted him better."

Count Dooku nodded. "I do believe you." He wasn't sure what this energy was that she'd tapped into, but Dooku knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that she would never intentionally hurt Kenobi.

"I couldn't stop the energy flowing and Obi-Wan was screaming, begging Qui-Gon to let him die. Qui-Gon was furious. I know he's gonna tell the Council that I'm dangerous, that we're in a relationship, and they'll never let me near Obi-Wan, or anyone else, ever again." She sniffed, more tears trickling down her face.

Dooku silently handed over another clean handkerchief. Buffy took the soft fabric from him, wiped her face and blew her nose. A small part of her wondered how many handkerchiefs the Count carried around with him.

When she went to offer the damp hankie back, the Count grimaced and waved it away. "You keep it, I have plenty more."

"Thanks," she said in a small voice.

"Miss Summers, it sounds as if whatever you did gave Kenobi another chance at life. As for Qui-Gon... You mustn't worry about him running to the Council with tales, I shall speak to him."

"What if Obi-Wan hates me?" That was her worst fear.

Dooku gave a soft snort. "Extremely unlikely."

"But what if he does?"

The Count knew it was useless to argue with her. The only person with the power to convince her that he didn't hate her was Obi-Wan. "Then you will meet the problem if it occurs. Until then, we must concentrate on the here and now. Come, we have a job to do. There are vampires rampaging throughout the Senate building. We should-."

"Mace Windu!" shrieked Buffy, confusing Dooku.

Buffy remembered the way Mace had looked at her and how the Force had tried tugging her into action. All this time when she'd been wallowing in self-pity others needed her. What if Mace was up in Sid's office right now? What if this was going to be a recreation of the scene where... Buffy tensed, hoping that she was wrong, but her gut instinct was telling her differently.

"Mace has gone to Sid's office," she stated. She bit her lip, thinking of another vampire she needed to meet. "What are the odds Sifo is up there with them? If we don't hurry, Mace and the others will die."

And she was through the door, striding towards the elevator, Count Dooku marching alongside her.

Up on Palpatine's floor they found two guards blocking the door to his offices. Both wore the imposing uniform of the Senate Guards, blue robes, plumed helmets, weapons, and carried themselves with such an air of discipline and self-importance that they would have fooled many. Buffy, however, knew that they were imposters as soon as the elevator door opened.

In their turn, the guards recognised her as the Slayer, exchanged looks, and stepped out into the corridor to face her. Before she had the chance to warn Dooku that these were vampires and not normal guards, the older man had moved. Drawing on his strong connection to the Force, Dooku sprang. The Force propelling him forward with a blur of speed and fuelling his swift somersault over the vampires' heads.

Landing behind the pair, the elderly Count sent out a strong Force push. "Take that, you vampire scum!"

The guards were thrown off their feet and launched down the corridor with such force that Buffy had to leap to one side to avoid being bowled over by them. They hit the wall behind her, one bursting into a shower of ash from the stake Buffy had thrown at him on the way past, the second crashing head-first into the wall with a loud squawk.

Stunned, the guard fumbled blindly for his lightsaber but was all for naught. Mr Sparkly's crimson blade swirled through the air and severed his neck long before he could find the power button.

Buffy regarded the two piles of ash sourly before walking to where Dooku waited by the door.

"No quips?" he asked the unusually silent woman.

She shook her head, refusing to look at him, and replied,"It's time we moved on."

Dooku's eyes dropped from her face to the bacta powder gathered in clumps around the wounds on her neck. His face hardened. Master Yoda taught that a Jedi should not lust for revenge, yet here he was sorely wanting to dust Sidious in the darkest possible way for what he'd done to Buffy. The Dark Side whispered to him, as it had several times in the past, causing him to turn sharply away from Buffy.

Buffy put a hand on his arm and the whispering quietened at her touch.

"I'm sensing a vampire lying-in-wait in the next room," she said. "I'll deal with the vamp whilst you find Mace and the others. They haven't come this way so they must taken Palpatine's private turbo-lift." Buffy hesitated, hoping the man wouldn't take offence when she added, "Be careful, stay away from the window, and try not to do anything flamboyant that might lead to you having both your hands cut off."

Dooku gave her an indecipherable look, then nodded. They then took up a position on either side of the door and Dooku hit the controls.

The door slid open slowly with a low hiss. Buffy craned her neck, peering into the darkness of the room beyond. She scowled. She'd seen vampires use the dark room trick before. Whoever walked into the room would need a moment for their eyes to adjust to the light.

Deciding that the trap needed to be sprung by a Slayer rather than a Jedi, she threw herself into the room, turning a cartwheel before falling and to tuck into a forward roll. There came the sound of movement, the familiar hiss of someone igniting their lightsaber, and then a red glow lit up the room. A figure came hurtling towards her, his shadow bouncing along the far wall.

Buffy flipped onto her feet, her own scarlet lightsaber igniting and rising to block the overhead attack. The twisted visage of Master Sifo-Dyas glared down at her as he pressed his hateful crimson blade against hers. Inside Buffy, flames of anger rose up, and she forced her lips to pull upwards into a parody of a smile. "Fancy meeting you here. I'm so gonna enjoy our dance."

Over Sifo-Dyas shoulder, she saw that Dooku had entered the room and now stood, halfway along the wall, watching her. Buffy's eyes slid meaningfully to the door on the far side of the room, the one she knew led to Palpatine's offices.

"Hmm," Sifo-Dyas parried her blade to one side and thrust at her once again. He grinned evilly at her. "Why would you feel like that?"

Buffy blocked him and shot Dooku another look, frowning at his lack of movement. She didn't have time to shout he needed to get a move on as, at that precise moment, Sifo-Dyas came at her with a particularly aggressive set of fast blows and she had to focus on the fight.

The dark-haired Sifo-Dyas pressed his blade against hers, sneering "What's wrong Miss Summers? Don't tell me that you are upset because I played tag with your favourite Jedi?" He threw up a hand, using the Force to pull down a stack of chairs that had been piled up next to the wall. In her haste to get away from the falling chairs, Buffy wasn't aware of the Force push he'd sent her way until it was too late. She was sent, sprawling, against a large desk.

Buffy rolled, just in time to avoid being crushed as the desk flipped over, coming to land in the spot she'd vacated.

Sifo-Dyas spun into the Count's direction. Dooku, who'd been in the process of tip-toeing to the door, froze. "Think I didn't know you were here, Dooku?" he snarled, forked lightning flying from his fingertips.

Dooku's lightsaber sprang to life, his arm holding the green blade vertically and at a slant - deflecting the stream of lightning away from himself and back at Sifo-Dyas, who had to duck to avoid being struck.

Buffy scrambled from the floor. "Go!" she yelled at Dooku.

The vampire turned, the gush of lightning streaming towards her now. It didn't occur to Buffy to deflect it, instead, she leaped sideways, bouncing off the wall, and landing behind the vampire. Her blade arced and Sifo-Dyas let out a shriek as the tip of the energy blade sliced through cloth and skin, drawing a dark line across his back. The acrid smell of charred cloth and burnt flesh filled the air.

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked, beginning to circle around the vampire seeking another opening. "Happy to stab others in the back yet don't like it being done to you, Silo?" Her voice shook, not from fear, but rage. Buffy struck, her blows becoming stronger as she allowed the Force to soothe and hone her focus.

The ex-Jedi's face contorted at the sudden change of tempo, he stumbled, and almost lost his footing. His face twisting, his features morphing into a vampire's as he snarled with an almost primeval hatred.

Their blades locked. Sifo-Dyas leaned in, his face snarling as he spat, "Kenobi was stabbed because he is weak. It is a pity he can't be here to watch when I take my revenge on you."

Buffy parried the energy blade away, striking again and again in a flurry of blows. For a moment she thought that she nearly had him, but the vampire seemed to dissolve, slipping to one side as Mr Sparkly sliced downward and cut into the upturned desk. As she pulled her blade free, Sifo took advantage by executing a low blow to her legs.

With her own blade still inside the desk, Buffy had no choice but to jump, tucking her knees over the vampire's blade. Then she kicked. One foot slammed into his chest, the other catching him under the chin. Sifo-Dyas's head jerked back and he staggered.

With her blade free and her feet firmly on the ground, Buffy swung the red blade once more. The weapon bit deep into the vampire's chest, gouging through flesh and tearing at bones like a hot knife through butter. He screamed, falling backwards as though in slow motion, his face filled with a mixture of surprise, pain, and horror.

"That looks kinda nasty," Buffy said in a casual tone as she turned off her lightsaber slowly and deliberately in front of the fallen ex-Jedi. "You're a vampire so you won't die of it though. As a matter of fact, you could spend an eternity in that condition if I want you to."

"That's...dark. You're dark," rasped Sifo-Dyas, his yellow eyes wide with panic.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Have you only just realised?" She flashed him a mega-watt smile as she fiddled with something in the back of her waistband. "I'm the darkest thing this galaxy has ever seen..."

With a blur of Slayer speed she struck, slamming the wooden stake through the gaping hole in Sifo-Dyas's chest to impale him through his non-beating heart. She stepped back, her expression growing melancholy as the vampire exploded and ash fell.

"...according to Qui-Gon I am anyway," she finished sadly.

The first thing Buffy noticed when she stepped through the door of Palpatine's office was the breeze. The wind was blowing in through the gaping hole that had once been a huge window overlooking the skyline of Coruscant. The second thing she noticed was the two dead Jedi masters, who lay within feet of the private elevator door.

Buffy moved further into the room, stepping over the smiling corpse of Kit Fisto and on towards the broken window where Mace Windu stood, his purple lightsaber held menacingly at the fallen Palpatine.

"Dooku!" she called. The elderly Jedi was nowhere in sight.

"I'm over here, Buffy," a voice called from behind a group of chairs at the other side of the room. "I'm quite alright. Landed badly and there is something wrong with my leg – again." Dooku's voice sounded bitter, no doubt annoyed with himself.

Satisfied that the Count wasn't dead or dying, Buffy continued towards the two figures by the window.

"Stay back, Buffy, this is Jedi business," Mace called over to her, never taking his eyes from the Sith Lord who half-lay, half-sat, against the wall. He wagged the purple blade at him. "You, my Lord are under arrest."

"Mace can you, like, move away from the window?" Buffy asked. The wind whistled into the room and there was broken glass shards everywhere. Mace was only a foot or so from the edge of the window ledge and outside in the Coruscant night sky she could see lines of speeders flying past. She hated heights, why did everything have to be so high up on this planet?

"The window's fine," Mace called back. "Don't worry about it."

Palpatine gazed over at Buffy, wearing a woe-is-me-expression. "Help me," he asked his voice quavering with emotion. "This isn't about vampires this is about the Jedi Order trying to take power-."

"Oh, please," Buffy cut in, "save me from the speeches. That one isn't going to work with me. And Mace, can you, please, move away from the window?"

"Your plot to gain control over the galaxy has failed," Mace said to Palpatine, ignoring her. "You will never be Emperor here. You have lost."

"No!" Palpatine raised his hands. "It is the Jedi who have lost! You will die!" Blue Force lightning shot from his fingers at Mace.

Buffy ran towards them, Mr Sparkly humming in the air beside her.

"Get him, Vader!" yelled Palpatine. Who for some odd reason seemed to think Buffy was on his side. "You're a Sith like me. The Jedi are the mortal enemies of the Sith and they will never trust you."

Buffy looked from one man to the other, unsure how to help. Mace was grimacing as he repelled the Force lightning and Sid's face was becoming even uglier than normal.

"Help me," begged Sid, "Help me Vader, I'm just a poor man who can't..." his voice trailed away as he collapsed, apparently exhausted.

Buffy was not fooled. "Mace step away from the window now. He's got more Force lightning up his sleeve."

"I'm fine, Buffy, really," said the Jedi Master.

Suddenly, Palpatine sent a Force push at Mace and the man staggered, losing his grip on his lightsaber which flew through the window.

"Power! Absolute power," cackled Palpatine. He laughed manically and sent another stream of Force lightning at Mace. The Jedi flew up into the air, through the window, and dropped out of sight, presumably to hit the ground many feet below.

Darth Sidious rose to his feet, advancing on Buffy who lifted her red lightsaber in front of her. But Palpatine didn't intend to fight her, he lowered his voice, letting it become wheedling, "Accept your destiny, accept the Sith title of Darth Vader, and rule alongside me."

"Don't do it, Buffy!" yelled Count Dooku's voice from behind the chairs. "You don't want to become a vampire, there'll be no more sunbathing!"

"Ignore him!" snarled Darth Sidious, circling around her. "He's an old, weak fool who can teach you nothing. Accept me as your master and I shall give you the power to save Obi-Wan."

Buffy's cheeks flared pink. "Umm, I think I've messed that one up all by myself." She brought up Mr Sparkly, striking a fighting pose. "It is time you came with me, Sid. The Jedi want to arrest you, so-"

"I think that time is over," interjected the voice of Master Mace Windu from the window.

Palpatine swung around, his mouth dropping open at the sight of the man he'd thought had fallen to his death. "How did you..."

Jango Fett appeared, hovering outside the broken window in full armour, he waved a gloved hand at Buffy before dropping out of sight.

Mace Windu grinned. "Buffy thought you might try throwing me from the window so she asked the Mandalorian bounty hunter to keep an eye out for me. In case, I needed him."

"You can't kill me," growled Darth Sidious. "Only the darksaber is capable of killing the strongest Sith vampire in the galaxy!"

Buffy smiled, the dark smile of a vampire Slayer. "But we can cut lots of bits off, Sid."

"No!" Palpatine growled, and with a whirl of billowing, dark robes he ran. Charging from the room with Buffy and Mace on his heels.

"He can't go far," Mace told Buffy, slowing his pace once he saw the direction Palpatine had taken. "There's no way out of those chambers."

The Jedi master used the Force to open the next set of doors and they entered the room, looking around them for the missing Palpatine. It was empty. Only an open door leading onto a balcony stood testimony to where the Sith Lord had gone.

Buffy was through the door first, leaning over the balcony, and looking around her.

"There!" Mace jostled in next to her, his finger pointing at a craft zooming off below them.

Buffy eyes could just make out the figure of Sheev Palpatine in the passenger seat and Jar Jar Binks driving before the speeder sped off into the lines of traffic and was lost from sight. It seemed that they hadn't been the only ones making contingency plans. The old schemer had escaped to fight another day.