Many, many years ago, Filbrick and Caryn Pines were proud to bring two young, healthy, not-quite normal boys. If you knew of their children, you most likely only considered the roller coaster of a life the two of them had, how their own decisions shaped their existence. But in this universe, the most important thing to focus on presently was a decision that was not their own. This decision was made by their father, and it would... well... the Author would have been shy enough already.

"Filbrick..." Caryn said, not looking at her husband, but at the two infants cradled in her arms. "Would you just look at them..." Her husband groaned, then said, "Nothin' else we got to do here."

Caryn didn't seem to notice Filbrick's attitude, instead, she focused on keeping her heart from melting as her eldest yawned and brought his six-fingered hand in front of his tiny face. "Oh Filbrick... What should we name them?" Her eyes tore themselves away from the new life that she had created, and focused on her husband, who adjusted his glasses so that he could look at the two boys from over them.

"Well, I always like the name Stan..." He said, and Caryn smiled tiredly again. "So... Stanford and Stanley?"

"No. Stan, and Stann." Caryn blinked at her husband. "Dear, we can't give them the same name. They already share so much..." She blinked at her husband, who shook his head a little bit. "They can share that too. Stann has six fingers while Stan has five." his wife, who hadn't heard the slight difference in how he had pronounced the two names. "Well..." she said, suppressing a sigh. "At least they'll have different middle names... right?"

Fibrick nodded, "Of course. Filbrick, and Filbric." Once again, Caryn did not hear the difference between the two names that her husband had said. "So... Stan Filbrick, and Stan Filbrick?" Filbrick shook his head, and said, "Stann Filbrick, and Stan Filbric."

By this time Caryn's eyes were starting to fill up with small tears. "Honey... Dear... I can't tell the difference between..." just as she released a small sniff Stann let out a small bawl. "Shh, shh," she said, putting on a small smile for her eldest. "Come on Stann... It's okay... I'll talk your father out of this. We still haven't signed the paper-"

"I signed the papers earlier."
"YOU WHAT?!"


Stan blinked up at the portal, where his brother was stepping towards him. A feeling of joy overcame him, and he pushed himself to his feet. His twin came closer and closer to him and his niece and nephew, first scooping up his Journal from off of the dirt floor, then reaching up and tugging a full face mask off of him. His brother still looked almost exactly like Stan, with a few exceptions proving that they weren't quite identical, and Stan longed to speak to his brother, to tell him about Dipper and Mabel, and hopefully restore their twice-broken relationship.

"Who is that?" Dipper breathed, and Stan answered him in the only way he knew how. "The Author of the Journals... my brother."

"Stan." At the mention of his name Stan instinctively said, "Present... Oh yeah... Uh... Hi! Finally, I did it! I got you back!" He stepped towards his brother, who stared at him with emotionless intensity, and watched Stan throw his arms open wide. "You're actually here! Stann! How are you Stann?"

"I'm a bit frustrated, Stan, but otherwise I'm good. I'd ask how you are, but I think I already know the answer to that, at least in the next few moments." Stann cracked his knuckles, and Stan laughed. "Very funny Stann," Stan said, but his brother didn't smile. He laughed again, this time less assured, and took a small step back as Stann began a slow march towards him. "Uh... Are you gonna..."

"I could have been FORD! BUT NOOO!" Stann shouted at his brother, "This is all your fault Stan!" Stan blinked at his furious brother, who looked about ready to pummel him in the face, and other highly sensitive areas. "Uh... What? How is this my fault?" He pressed a hand into his chest, doing his best not to look away from his brother, who huffed, and shouted, "I don't know! But everything is at least one Stan's fault, and I didn't do it! We could have been different! I could have been FORD!"

Stan was beyond confused. Sure Stann had complained a bit about their naming situation before, but he'd never acted like this. What kind of name was 'Ford' anyway? Then again, his name was literally Stann, so any name would really be almost better. Still, he blinked at his brother, who threw his arms in the air and dropped them nearly instantly.

"I suppose this is really dad's fault," Stann hissed, glaring deeply at his brother. "Is dad alive? If so, I need to punch him in the face. Seriously! Out of all of the Filbrick's in the Multiverse, he had to be the one to name me Stann!? When I have a son I'll name him something logical, like Nikola! Or Thomas! Or Albert! Or..." Stann sighed, grabbing onto his hair and looking like he was going to pull it out at any moment.

Stan himself blinked at his brother, then said, "Why don't you just name him Science dude? Wait... When you have a son?" His brother's eyes met his in a blaze of silent fury. "Stan. If you say one more word about this I will plant my fist in your face and you will see more than just stars and stripes. In face, you'll be lucky if you ever see anything ever again if I have my way with..."

"Hi! Yeah, uh Mabel here! Quick question; What on earth is going on here!?" The two Stans' attention was diverted from each other, and Stann's wrath, by the voice of their young niece, standing in between her brother and Soos. "There are two Grunkle Stans? What?" She held her arms out in front of her, like she was trying to scoop the two of them into her arms.

"Stan, you didn't tell me there were children down here," Stann said, adjusting his glasses and instantly deflating, a look of confusion covering his anger. Stan sighed at his brother's statement, then answered, "Well Stann, first off I didn't have a chance, secondly they're your family. Shermie's grandkids." He turned to face the same direction as Stann and missed the overjoyed look crossing his brother's face. "I have a niece and nephew?" Stann asked, his eyes widening behind his thick black frames.

He stepped towards the children, Mabel instinctively stepping forward as well, and Dipper shrinking a bit back, still in shock. "Greetings," Stann said, kneeling down and offering the girl a hand. "Do kids still say 'greetings'? I haven't been in this dimension for a really long time." Mabel reached out and gripped her uncle's hand, letting him shake it up and down. "Whoa, a six-fingered handshake, that's a full finger friendlier than normal."

Stann's face was even more overjoyed. He had done a full 180 with his attitude in a manner of moments, and Stan was worried about his brother. Then again, life did seem to move a bit too fast for their taste..."


"There's Stan Pines! Get 'im!"

If Stann had a nickel... no, no, penny, for every time someone confused him with his brother, he'd have so much money his father would be content. Often it was people who knew one of the twins, and or strangers meeting them for the first time. I mean, it was an easy concept to explain, "He has one N, I have two", but the execution was quite difficult.

Speaking of execution... Looks like Stan had made a few enemies for Stann to take care of. Enemies in stained clothes with broken pitchforks. There were men and women, even a child or two was there in the mob. They all had a common goal; vengeance upon Stan Pines.

Did Stan really have to drag Stann into this?

Stann held his hands up, subconsciously forcing his fingers together, as to not draw attention to his extra digits. The people didn't notice his deformation, instead they channeled all of their focus into shouting a string of cuss words at him. Man, whatever Stan had done to them had ticked them off. How on earth could Stann explain that he was actually Stann Pines, and not Stan Pines. That just sounded stupid. What he needed was a pseudonym. A name that he could slip on like a mask and wear whenever he needed to get away from his, or his brother's, enemies.

"Uh... I'm not Stan Pines... I'm... Uh... Stanley Pinington!" he exclaimed, sweat pouring down his forehead. Stanley Pinington? Seriously Stann? That was the best you could come up with? The crowd seemed to relax briefly, then someone yelled, "Isn't Stanley Piningtont the guy with the RipOff?!"

The mob dropped their pitchforks to their sides, not letting go of them, but they didn't seem as inclined to murder Stann anymore. "No, no, that's Steve. This must be the real Stan Pines! Get him guys!"

The worst part was... they weren't wrong. Thanks dad.


"And it's not like you guys are Mabel and Mabelle! That's just crazy! No one in their right mind would do that!"

At first, Dipper had liked spending time with the Author. The guy was cool, did a lot of science stuff, used to play DD&More D, and was, well, the Author of the Journals. But every time you pulled all of the paranormal stuff out of his life, all he was left talking about was his name. To think that after having something for sixty-plus years he'd have gotten used to it.

Stan assured him that he wasn't always like this. Dipper hoped so. Stann grabbed parts of his hair, his head bent over a piece of paper he didn't want Dipper seeing. "I'm so close... If only I could figure out how to... I mean, time travel can't be that complicated. There's even a dimension where it happens without anyone doing anything! I can at least try." Dipper gulped, watching Stann curl his fingers in his hair and tug ever so slightly. "Come on Stann... Get ahold of yourself... It's not that bad..."

The two of them sat there silently for a minute, Dipper focusing on only breathing and trying his hardest not to upset his uncle even further. Stann sighed, turning to his nephew, a tired look crossing his features. "Sorry my boy, I'm a bit frazzled after the... incident with the machine. Mabel may have brought back Unicorn hair, and the Shack might be safe... But once we leave the premises we'll still be vulnerable."

Dipper nodded, guiltily looking at the broken monitors inside of Stann's private study. Stann followed his eyes, and said comfortingly, "You know I don't blame you, right Dipper?"

His nephew nodded, shifting uncomfortably. "Yeah, I know great uncle Stann... Waaaiiit a minute... That's it!" Dipper threw his arms in the air, "I figured out your name problem!" His uncle's mouth dropped open, Stann mouthing a 'What' and rapidly blinking his eyes. "Dipper... That... What?"

"My names' not Dipper!" Dipper said, a grin spreading across his lips. "My name is really Mason! Dipper's just a nickname! Everyone just calls me that because I hate my real name!" He pointed at his uncle, and said seriously, "Now all you need great uncle Stann is... Well, a nickname." The two of them just stared at each other for a moment, then Stann said, "Well Dipper, I don't see why we can't try..."


"But you've already got a nickname! It's Sixer!" Stan looked at his twin, nephew, and niece (who had been on Stann's side before she had even known it) who had been explaining what Stann wanted to him. Stann flopped his hand from side to side, shaking his head, "That nickname might work for a select few... But it's not a name I can introduce myself as."

Stan sighed, rolling his eyes and saying, "Whatever captain picky." Stann shook his head again, "That one won't work either Stan. It needs to be something..."

"OOH! What about Author! Dipper was calling you the Author for months before we met you!" Mabel's realization cut off her uncle's sentence. He looked over at his niece, who's purple sweater held a book knitted into it. "Author... I don't know..."

"I can totally call you great uncle Author," Dipper said quietly, almost in a mumble. "I mean... If you want..." His eyes roved across the floor, and Stan sighed. "If you're so desperate to disassociate us... Fine, I guess I can call you Author. But be prepared to sign a whole lot of books for me." The two older Pines twins looked at each other, and Stann was about to say something when Mabel declared, "Well, that settles it Grunkle Stann... Author. Your new name is Author, and this is what we shall call you until the end of time."

Stann, Author he guessed, didn't have time to say anything before Mabel dashed past him and cried, "I'm gonna make you a naming cake! I have a new Grunkllleee!" Author blinked after his niece, and he started whispering under his breath.

"I could have been Ford... Nice, simple, short... Ford..."


Hello my people. I have returned... With the right chapter! (Thanks Anonymous!)

This chapter stemmed from a 'discussion' I had with my brother. I had been trying to explain the Reverse Portal AU, and I asked, "So, who was trapped in the Multiverse?"
"Stan."
"And who stayed behind?"
"Stan."
"You... Aren't wrong... but... Oh man, inspiration."

So... This Filbrick is sort of a jerk. At least he names Sherman... Sherman, and not Stannn, or Sttan, or Stanne. Come on man! At least mix up the order of the names! Poor Caryn not even knowing which Stan is which for the longest time. Poor Stann... Ford... Author? Poor him. There must have been a million things that he got punished for when it was actually Stan.

I am so glad I don't have to keep them straight anymore.

On to the last review/s! Anonymous, don't feel bad for the longer reviews. In fact, I really like them! I like short ones too, but it's sometimes the best I can get. It can convey the thought that someone else cared enough about my work to think this hard about it. So in many aspects, longer is better! And thanks for telling me some of your favorites. (and my AO3 account does have the same name as this one).

Hope you guys enjoyed this! Have a great day!

-BrilliantLight