Chapter 92: What Might Have Been...

The house felt oddly empty with everyone else gone for the time being. Carl and Holly had taken Thomas back home to SoHo while Ruth travelled with Molly to her mansion in New York. All was done to give everyone in the Carson/Whitman home some much-needed time to themselves. It was difficult to comprehend how long the eight of them had been living together and they were an interesting bunch, to say the least. A millionaire socialite, two lawyers, a steel plant worker, a homemaker, a former heiress, a young child, and a toddler; all with very different personalities and values and they had all somehow managed not become sick of one another… Perhaps it was due to their common goal of rescuing Jack and Rose that they had very little time or energy to get on each other's nerves. The lack of sleep shared amongst all of them was likely a factor as well, too tired to get into disputes.

Despite the current separation, both Peter and Emma could not have asked for a better family… and team, even if it was rather unusual and unconventional. Never in a million years had Emma thought that she would be surrounded by people who were there for her just as much as her parents had been. If they had not been around, Emma was uncertain whether she'd be able to hold herself together as she had been.

Holly and Carl were the family's rocks; they were the ones who stayed calm and rational when things became difficult and they were able to lend a hand when needed. Molly was the voice of reason in the family, but she also had a good head on her shoulders and could come up with a new plan within a few minutes of thinking. She was the glue that kept everyone together and pushed them forward in the search of Rose and Jack. Ruth was a little harder to read and place in their familial unit… often she seemed rather helpless as she'd lived in the wealthy, upper-crust bubble for so long that she had little knowledge on how to deal with the real world. She also wasn't exactly the most maternal, her daughter could attest to that. However, she was the person who was always there to listen when there was a problem, and she had the best understanding of Cal and how he worked. Thomas and Sybil were the relief and the ones to break the tension; after a long day of searching, work, and other forms of drama, the innocence of the youngest members were sorely needed and renowned. At the end of every day, Thomas would amuse them with fun activities by including the adults in his playing with toys or his mischievous actions that would often lead to a scolding from his mother. Sybil's antics as a toddler of exploring the world also kept everyone's spirits up and reminded them to smile when they needed it the most. Finally, Emma and Peter were the determined members and driving force of the family/team, the ones who made things happen and who kept hope alive. They worked non-stop on the front lines, making sure the police were doing their job and using the law to their advantage. All that was missing was the heart, something both Jack and Rose embodied and the reason that the family had come together in the first place. The couple needed to be rescued as soon as possible.

Emma plays with Sybil on the floor of the living room while Peter lays on the couch, reading a book that was not related to their ongoing search. It was nice to have a bit of a break, even if it was temporary.

"Pretty strange isn't it?" Emma asks.

"What?" Peter asks, looking up from his book.

"How quiet the house is."

"I know, it's been a while since it's just been the three of us…"

Sybil grabs a block from the tower she's been building with her big sister and shoves it into her mouth.

"How it could have been if we'd never gone to that party or the ship hadn't sunk."

Peter grimaces and shuts his eyes, trying to shove away the memories of that horrible night. However, the same feeling of dread washes over him and he can see the ship alive with lights, many of them underwater as the stern rose higher and higher into the air. The thoughts of where Emma might have been on the ship as it plunged into the dark water or if her screams were amongst the thousands he heard, freezing and dying … it was amazing that he hadn't become violently ill in the lifeboat as the thoughts now cause him to stand up and go to the kitchen for a glass of water.

Emma follows him, leaving Sybil on the floor to continue playing. She goes over and wraps her arms around his middle, holding him tight. The memories of that night would be with them forever, but as she'd told herself before, the way to conquer them was to make new and happier ones… and so far they were failing miserably.

Peter turns and returns her embrace. They stand quietly in the kitchen for a long time, keeping their hearts and thoughts close to one another.

"What if we hadn't gone to the party?" Peter wonders aloud. "What if I'd just stayed in with you that night?"

The couple cuddle on the couch as the afternoon sun begins to sink behind the houses of their neighbourhood. So far there had been no snow, despite the November weather becoming colder with each passing day. It was grayer and more miserable to match their moods. Sybil was curled up in her sister's arms, not quite asleep but very close to it.

"Then I would have had that dark cloud of misery over my head and would still be melancholy about everything. I wouldn't have had the epiphany on the dance floor, and we wouldn't have gotten married on the bow the next day," Emma answers.

Peter smiles, remembering how beautiful she looked on the bow; the golden light illuminating her face and the cool wind blowing her hair behind her like a makeshift veil. But it was the smile on her face, a genuine smile of love and happiness, that had made Peter's heart race. She wasn't forcing any false grin to mask the pain she was feeling, she wasn't grieving her parents or thinking about her loss, she was feeling love for her husband and thinking about what she was gaining from the ceremony.

"I just wonder… if I hadn't forced you into the lifeboat to be with Sybil… would you have stayed behind and gone down with the ship?" Emma swallows, her heart skipping a few beats in unease. Tears are fighting their way into her eyes.

"Maybe… or maybe I would have offered my services on one of the lifeboats… Those times your father took me sailing likely saved my life… or I would have tried to get onto the collapsible as you did…"

She shudders and cuddles closer to him. If Peter had died on the Titanic, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to go on… another loss in her life, leaving her with only her sister. Maybe Sybil would have been her only reason to live and it killed her inside. Fortunately, they'd both made it through relatively unscathed.

"Sybil wouldn't have been kidnapped and we also wouldn't have been shot at by Cal."

The scars they bore from making friends with Rose and Jack are reminders of how dangerous the world could be… do they regret not meeting them?

Hell no, Rose and Jack were their family and if they had not met each other at that party (and two times before for Emma), their worlds would be incomplete. Families would go to hell and back for one another and Peter and Emma had done just that to help their friends get the happily ever after they deserved… that is until Cal interfered again.

"That month or so of separation wouldn't have happened… maybe we would have gotten married during that time…"

"Maybe," he murmurs, leaning his chin on her head. "Maybe our own little one on the way?"

Emma is skeptical of his suggestion. While she most definitely wanted to have a family with him, Sybil was technically their child and to have two babies in the house... or rather a baby and a toddler, the chaos may have been too much for the both of them.

"What if my parents hadn't died at all?"

A lengthy silence followed as tears slide down Emma's cheeks. She still missed her parents so much, the hole in her heart that would never heal, despite their unusual family.

"We'd never done any of that at all,"

"We could have travelled a bit and then gotten married," she says, the thoughts filling her mind. The freedom of responsibility and to simply be with Peter was comforting. She wouldn't have had to worry about her mother or father's health and she'd be able to go off on an adventure, knowing that they'd be waiting for her when she got back. It would also have been great to have her mother put the family heirloom in her hair as she dressed for the wedding and to have her father walk her down the aisle before handing her over to her husband. Sybil would have been there the whole time too, being taken care of and having the family she truly deserved to grow and thrive. It's not that the tiny tot wasn't flourishing in their care, it's just that she had been through a lot more drama than most babies her age.

"Bought our own house…"

"Maybe Canada… somewhere by the lake?" she asks.

"Started our family…"

The final words hang in the air… family… they definitely were one, just not what either of them had originally imagined.

After the silence, Emma turns to look up at Peter.

"Despite it all, I don't regret any of it… except losing my parents."

"Me neither," he smiles.

The two lean forward and kiss for a long time.

Just then, the telephone rings, forcing their embrace to come to an end.

Peter goes to answer it, leaving Emma to cradle her now sleeping sister.

On the other end is Officer Joel, Jack's friends and officer on the case. He speaks calmly to the lawyer, keeping the couple up to date. It's a brief conversation before Peter hangs up.

"What is it?"

"They're bringing in Cal's father, Nathan Hockley for questioning to see if he can figure out where his son might have taken Jack and Rose."

A/N: Please follow and review.