Author's Note (Monster): Hi guys! This is literally a slice of irony. I started writing this fic after Kelkel12 (also known as MKelly) and I were bullshitting about Spider-Dan and Bat Scene for Halloween, a long time ago. Back in those days, HU promised to release a new album at the start of 2019 but if you know HU, they always say "start of ..." and it turns out to be "end of ...". However, this time New Empire Vol. 1 came out in FEBRUARY 2020 instead of "start of 2019" so I find this fic very ironic to read. It's literally a meaningless little ficlet.

For those wondering about Blue Brute, I'm at 7k words. I'm still writing more whenever I can. It's in a very draft-type of phase so it'll get way longer and I'm not even remotely done with the events. The title of Blue Brute fits it more than ever because it doesn't refer to Johnny as "blue" because of his mask. It's the other definition of the word. Enjoy.

If you have a summary/pairing you'd like to see on here, request and I'll turn it into a fic as soon as possible (not very soon, long queue, sorry)


Bat Scene and Spider-Dan requested by MKelly/KelKel12

Charlie was crouched on the backrest of the couch, hands on the couch. He was staring heroically into the distance, cape hanging around him. He wore a bat-mask, the iconic batman logo on his chest and bat-belt with the batarang. Danny was sitting in the armrest, wearing the classic homemade Spiderman costume. J-Dog wanted to declare them insane, but then he remembered he was the one who put a white blanket over his head to be a ghost. He sat at the desk of the studio.

Funny Man had been lazy this time around and only wore the Mexican wrestling mask he had used in the Notes From The Underground era. Johnny hadn't even bothered to dress up.

"Why aren't you dressed up?" Danny asked, frown on his features.

Johnny raised an eyebrow, feet in Funny's lap. "Not everyone has all the time in the world to make a costume, you know. I was too busy spending time with my daughter, remember?"

J-Dog snorted a laugh. "The dad-card strikes again!"

"What? It's true", Johnny shrugged. "I'm too busy being a dad to participate in these silly events."

"You could've been a dad by dressing up too, you know. I bet she would've loved your costume. She could've made you into a unicorn!" Funny Man chuckled, earning a stomp to his arm.

Jay clapped his hands together. "Aight, we better get started. Let's gather the verses we came up with for the song we discussed last time. Okay, Charlie, your lines?"

"I'm not the hero LA needs. I'm the hero LA deserves", Charlie struggled to Bruce-Wayne it with the low voice.

"Those aren't… your lines", J-Dog sighed, shaking his head. "I need your actual verse."

Charlie huffed. "I am Bat Scene. I don't follow the rules of your socially constructed society. Fuck that."

The others chuckled, though Danny shoved him off the edge of the couch. The younger fell backwards and hit the ground not so softly with a groan. "There can only be one hero!"

"Fuck off, Spider-Dan!" Charlie grumbled from behind the couch, on the floor. He scurried upright to jump over the backrest and attack Danny. The singer squeaked in surprise and fought back.

"Bat Scene versus Spider-Dan", Johnny muttered. "Aren't they from a different universe?"

"Danny should've been Superman. It would've fit the franchise", Funny Man grinned. "Super-Dan vs Bat Scene."

"You suck for knowing that shit so well", J-Dog mocked the youngest. Dylan shrugged, poking at Johnny's feet in his lap. "I like the movies."

"Marvel's better", Johnny muttered barely audible but Funny had still heard it and jolted upright. "EXCUSE ME?"

"Ow, Danny! No biting!" Charlie complained, rubbing his arm. Danny squinted his eyes before they flew open again. "If Spider-Dan bites you, do you gain his powers? Because he's like, bitten by a radioactive spider. Do you think he can pass it on?"

"I think you're thinking of zombies instead", Charlie mused. "It's not like I'll pass on my bat-powers!"

Funny huffed. "Batman doesn't have any powers, Charlie. He used his fear as a theme to overcome an old fear."

"Did he? God, my character is a pussy then", the bandana rapper pouted. "This sucks."

"I suppose we won't be getting any work done on the record today then?" J-Dog offered. The other four chuckled at the remark.

"Maybe we should push it back some more. It's not gonna be ready for release by the start of 2019", he sighed.

Johnny jumped up, nearly knocking his feet into Funny's face. "NO! We're not pushing it back! We always do that crap. We promise them a new record at the start of the year and before we know it, it's released in fucking November instead!"

"You know", Charlie began to attract their attention, looking like he was really contemplating some serious ideas when he said: "Do you think we could get some trick or treating done?"

A round of sighs went around so the bandana rapper pouted, shifting his eyes to look at them all. Danny was on the couch again like he'd never been attacked. "What? I'm short. I could totally pretend to be a teenager."

"I don't think teenagers even do that crap. It's for little kids, man", Danny brought it to Charlie and the younger moaned in annoyance before jumping up. "Wait, Johnny! I can totally trick or treat with you and Ava, right? They'll think we're a gay couple."

"Asia's taking her this year", Johnny shrugged. "I don't like doing that shit. Trick or treating, I mean."

"You don't like trick or treating?!" Charlie sucked in an insulted breath. "BLASPHEMY!"

"Besides, you look 40 years old", Spider-Dan chimed in. Charlie slowly turned his head to Danny. The studio was quiet for a whole second before Charlie lowly asked; "Excuse me?"

Danny stuck out his tongue. "I said you look 20 years old and young adults are too old for trick or treating."

Charlie pursed his lips. "Better."

"Disaster avoided", Funny Man chuckled. "Calling the youngest of the band 40 years old."

Charlie gave Funny a look. "You're younger than me, dumbass."

"Only by half a year", the other scoffed. "I'm more mature in behaviour."

"You are so not more mature in behaviour!" Charlie complained. A silence fell over them and he, too, saw the irony of yelling at Funny Man while fully dressed up as Batman. He took a seat next to Danny and folded his arms. "God fucking damnit, you guys."

"So we're pushing back the record?" Jay asked, looking at Johnny.

Johnny sighed. "We're pushing back the record. But not further than November, alright? I want New Empire to be out by November, you hear me?"

"You're not the only one in the band, Johnny. We can decide when to release shit, too", Danny complained.

Johnny glared at Danny and the blonde cracked a smile. "But of course we want it out earlier than November. How about we come in for work tomorrow?"

"Can't", Charlie objected.

Johnny raised an eyebrow at him. The younger shrugged. "Gonna be sick from eating all that trick or treat candy."

"Where the fuck are you gonna get the candy if you can't trick or treat?"

Charlie made an insulted sound. "I can totally rob one of the kiddos."

"Dude."

"What?"

"Not cool. Don't say stuff like that."

Charlie shook his head. "I was kidding! Jeez. No trust in me?"

"Dunno, dude. Bat Scene seems like a really bad antihero", Funny Man argued. The others just agreed with it. Charlie made a face. "What about Spider-Dan then?!"

"Witty, awkward and cute. Just like the real one", Funny replied.

"Gay", Jay said. "But fine, we'll come in to record later and push back the record if need be. But not further than November 2019, alright?"

"Alright", they all agreed.


Please review, they're my fuel!

If you have a summary/pairing you'd like to see on here, request and I'll turn it into a fic as soon as possible (not very soon, long queue, sorry)