Always Remember Us This Way

Daryl POV

I stomped down the hall leading to our room trying to shake the anger and frustration that stuck to me like glue. I knew living at The Sanctuary wouldn't be a walk in the park, but these assholes were wearing on my last damn nerve. Merle said it wasn't their fault, not entirely, that I was being too tough on them. I ain't never seen him be so calm or reasonable. It made even more pissed. If you wanted to survive in this world you had be tough because if you weren't, you were dead. Lord knows I'd buried enough friends along the way to learn that lesson.

It pissed me off they didn't understand that.

It pissed me off that Merle might be right.

It pissed me off I was being forced to play nice with people who'd tried to kill us repeatedly.

Ever since we moved to this shithole I'd be been pissed and it was exhausting.

When I opened the door to our room I saw Red sitting on the bed humming while she strummed a guitar. Her big, green eyes went wide when the door slammed against the wall, but it was the faint hint of a blush on her cheek that stole my breath away. You'd think I'd get used to seeing her like this, wouldn't be a fumbling idiot every time she looked at me, but I didn't think I'd ever get used to loving her. Every time with Red was like the first time. I still had no idea why she picked me, but damn if I wasn't gonna hold on with both hands.

"Bad day at the office honey?" she purred, giving me a lopsided grin. She pushed the guitar off her lap, sitting up straighter like it might somehow hide the instrument behind her thin frame.

"Practicing again?"

I pointed at the guitar, closing the door softly and shrugging out of my vest. She blew a strand of hair out of her eyes, picking up the instrument. Her hair was down, long red strands hanging over her perky breasts, and I had to close my eyes and take a deep breath to keep from pouncing on her like a horny teenager.

"Jesus says I need to practice." Jesus was a smart man. He'd been trying to teach Red to play the guitar for a few weeks and so far the only sound she'd been able to make sounded like a cow being slaughtered. "I think I'm getting better."

Her fingers brushed against the cords, and I braced for the worst but was pleasantly surprised for once. The tune was almost enjoyable. She missed a few cords here and there, her face scrunching up in concentration trying to right the ship and I couldn't help but smile. Red approached learning to play the guitar like she did everything else, jumping in with both feet and beating it into submission.

When she was back on track she smiled up at me and my heart skipped a beat. She started humming, refocusing on the instrument in her lap and I walked towards her. Sinking down on the bed at her side I couldn't tear my eyes away off her. She was oblivious, smiling happily while she continued to hum.

"What song is that?" I asked.

"I don't remember the name. It's something my grandma used to sing when I was little."

The pain that flashed in her eyes pulled at my heart strings. She didn't talk about her family often, but I knew they were always on her mind. She'd lost so much, even before the world ended. Sometimes I wasn't sure where she found the strength to go on, especially in the beginning, but I suppose that was just who she was. The word surrender wasn't in her vocabulary.

"Will ya play it for me?"

Her hands stilled, the soft music filling our cramped room stopping abruptly. "I uh...I don't think I'm ready for that."

"Please..." She narrowed her eyes, shaking her head in mock disappointment. I was hitting below the belt. She could never resist when I said please. "For me."

Her nostrils flared, eyes refocusing on the strings. "Cheap shot Katniss."

I snorted, shifting my weight to get more comfortable. She sat up straighter, adjusting the guitar while biting her plump lip, a look of pure determination on her face. The firsts few cords sounded off key and she pressed her lips together, repeating them until a soft, melodic tune filled the room.

That Arizona sky, burning in your eyes

You look at me and, babe, I wanna catch on fire

It's buried in my soul, like California gold

You found the light in me that I couldn't find

I couldn't remember the first time I heard her sing, but I remembered the shock I felt. Hearing something so pure come from someone so dangerous was surprising. To anyone who didn't know her she was carved out of stone, but underneath that she was all heart. That was how she sang, with her whole heart, putting everything she had into every lyric. It made goosebumps break out on my skin.

So when I'm all choked up but I can't find the words

Every time we say goodbye, baby, it hurts

She glanced up at me, swallowing hard. The feeling behind her words hit me straight in the gut. I'd do anything, absolutely anything to never be separated from her, but time and time again that was exactly the position we found ourselves in.

When the sun goes down, and the band won't play

I'll always remember us this way

I'd never cared much for music before Red, but I could listen to her sing all damn day. I couldn't take my eyes off her, willing myself to remember her in this moment. Her long hair was down and cascading over her shoulders. Her eyes were closed, her head tilted slightly to the side with a soft smile on her face like she was remembering something happy.

Lovers in the night

Poets trying to write

We don't know how to rhyme, but, damn, we try

But all I really know...you're where I wanna go

The part of me that's you will never die

The words hit close to home. How many times had I almost lost her? All the near misses and close calls flashed in my mind, making me curl my hands into fists like I could somehow fight off anything that might try to steal her from me. Worst still were all the times it might happen again.

So when I'm all choked up, but I can't find the words

Every time we say goodbye, baby, it hurts

When the sun goes down, and the band won't play

I'll always remember us this way

She gave me a shy, hesitant smile. She had an angelic voice, but I knew she hated singing for other people. I think it was cause it made her feel vulnerable. Singing was a window into her soul. Gone was the sarcastic assassin that feared nothing and no one. Sitting here in our dingy room playing a guitar and singing her heart out she was just Red.

When you look at me

And the whole world fades

I'll always remember us this way

As soon as she stopped I pulled the guitar out of her lap. I crawled forward, forcing her back until she was lying on the bed with me hovering over her. Her long, slender legs wrapped around my waist immediately and my dick swelled, straining against my zipper. I didn't think I'd ever get used to wanting her so fucking bad.

I wanted to rip off her clothes off and bury myself in her until she was screaming my name, but I forced myself to slow down. I wanted to savor every moment, take my time. I hadn't been with many women and I damn sure had never been with anyone who reacted to me like Red did. It was like she couldn't get enough, pulling my body closer even as she tightened her legs around my waist.

Everything about her was intoxicating. Her body was made for sin, the same raw aggression she unleashed while fighting she also set free in the bedroom. All it took was a swipe of my tongue across her thighs or the brush of my knuckles against the underside of her breasts and it was like I pushed a button, releasing her roaring passion. She burned hotter than fire, and if I died in her flames I'd die a happy man.

I ground my hips into her and her mouth parted slightly, eyes slamming shut, her breathy moan for more driving me wild. She arched her back, chest pressing into mine and my mouth went dry. She was pure putty under me, responding to every roll of my hips. Her fingernails scratched across my back, and even though I was still wearing my shirt I knew it would leave marks. The thought damn near drove me over the brink. I forced myself to focus on her face which wasn't easy considering the one thought blasting in my ears on repeat was fucking my wife until she screamed my name.

"I love you," she moaned as I kissed and nipped my way down her neck, "I always will...this side or the other."

Goddamn, I was helpless around this woman. I'd burn the world down to protect her. She was my everything and I'd do anything to keep her safe.

"Love ya so damn much Red," I whispered in her ear, biting her earlobe lightly.

She turned her head, giving me better access, her hands drifting down to my belt buckle. My dick throbbed with need, my vision narrows to pinholes I was so hard. I felt like I might explode in my pants like some kid when she slid my zipper down, cupping my length.

"Any change?"

My body jolted suddenly, snapping me out of the memory so fast I damn near fell out of the chair. Carol eyed me with a knowing smirk I immediately waved off. I rubbed my hands on my face roughly, trying to give my mind and body a chance to calm the fuck down. When that didn't work I grabbed a pillow off the bed and put it in my lap. I wasn't about to sit here and chat with Carol with my raging boner on full display.

"Nah," I replied, taking a deep breath.

"I just saw Rick." I nodded, eyes never straying from my wife who was still unconscious. "He's ornery as ever which Siddiq says is a good thing, means he's getting better." She shook her head in annoyance, but I saw the tiny smile on her face.

I'd only been to see Rick once, briefly, too scared to leave Red's side for long. He was in pain and the road to recovery was gonna be a long one, but he'd managed to avoid an infection so far. Truth was I didn't visit Rick cause I couldn't stand to hear him recount the events that led up to destruction of the bridge. How Red saved his life, pulled him off the metal bar that was impaled in his side, and stopped him from bleeding out.

It made my hands shake and my heart hurt listening to him sob while he told me he begged her to leave him behind, to let him shoot the dynamite, but instead she had covered him with a metal sheet, given him her wedding ring and made him promise to get it to me. Something inside me died every time I listened to how she sacrificed herself to save us all.

"You should get some sleep." I glared at her, but she simply glared back, crossing her arms over her chest. I missed the days back at the quarry when she was weary of me. "Maybe consider some food and a shower."

"I ain't leavin' her."

Carol sighed, leaning against the wall. "You're no good to her if you're dead on your feet. I can stay with her while you get some rest."

I wouldn't be able to sleep, not with my wife fighting for her life in a room down the hall. Just thinking about leaving her made it hard to breathe, and I scooted the chair closer to the bed, taking her hand in mine.

"Daryl..."

"No," I barked, shaking my head.

"It's been three days." I ground my teeth together, refusing to look at her. I knew how fucking long it had been. "We need to talk about..."

I exploded out of the chair and it flew back, hitting the ground with an audible thump. My eyes blazed as I stared down my best friend who regarded me coolly.

"I ain't talkin' 'bout shit cause I ain't givin' up on her." Carol opened her mouth to reply, but I didn't give her a chance. "She ain't never gave up on us!"

"I'm not talking about giving up on her."

"Sure as hell sounds like it."

She ran a hand through her short hair. "I just want you to be prepared." I scoffed, waving a dismissive hand at her as I began pacing the room. "You and Merle need to sit down with Siddiq. I know you want her to pull out of this and I do too, but we need to start talking about what we do if she doesn't."

I couldn't listen to this. I couldn't talk about life without her. Everyone was scared to consider that possibility, but no one more than me. I knew Carol was worried about me and to be honest she should be. My world was lying on that bed. My life was tied to hers. Simple fact was without her, I wasn't sure I could keep going.

I didn't remember picking up the chair, didn't remember screaming or hurling it at the wall. The antique furniture shattered on impact, shards of wood knocking a collection of small glass figurines off the nearby dresser.

The door burst open, Jesus and Glenn running in with wide eyes and grim faces. Merle, Francine, Maggie, Beth, and Michonne weren't far behind them, but I hardly noticed. For days I'd been sitting in that fucking chair holding my breath, waiting for my wife to open her eyes.

There was a raging beast in my chest I'd been struggling to subdue ever since I saw her on that bridge. Every time I closed my eyes I saw the explosion, saw her frail body flying through the air. I'd scrubbed my hands until they were raw and bleeding, but I could still see her blood on them.

Merle grabbed my shoulders, shouting at me to calm down, but I pushed him off, yelling words that didn't make a lick of sense. I grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him forward until we were nose to nose. He didn't try to defend himself, just kept trying to talk me down which only made it worse. I needed something to fight. I screamed so loud and so long my throat felt like it was bleeding when I finally stopped. My shoulders slumped in exhaustion as I fought back tears.

"Brother," Merle said softly, tears brewing in his own eyes. He hauled me in for a hug, fist pounding against my back.

"Oh my god," Beth exclaimed, hand covering her mouth.

Everyone in the room froze, eyes focused on the bed or more accurately the woman in the bed. At first I thought I was seeing things, but when her fingers twitched the entire room sucked in a collective breath of shock.

I rushed to her, eyes wild, waiting for any sign she was coming back to me. When her fingers twitched again and she moaned I fell to my knees, grabbing her hand and squeezing. I glanced at Merle across the bed and he smiled at me, not even bothering to hide his tears.

"Red, baby, can ya hear me?"

"Get Siddiq," Enid ordered, pushing her way through the crowd so she could give Red the once over.

No one was breathing, no one dared move a muscle. It felt like an eternity passed and nothing happened. I was having trouble controlling myself, the hope I'd been clinging to quickly being replaced with dread, but then she moved her head.

"Red, I'm here." I didn't know what to say, what to do.

"Keep talking to her," Enid suggested, hand on her wrist and eyes on her watch.

When she moaned in pain it was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard. Her mouth opened and closed a few times like she was trying to find her voice. I squeezed her hand, leaning closer, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"Take yur time. I ain't goin' nowhere."

My eyes flew to my hand in surprise and pure, unadulterated joy consumed me. Her slender fingers slowly curled around mine and she gave my hand a tiny squeeze.

"Hot damn," Merle marveled, hugging his wife so hard she squeaked in surprise.

I ran my fingers through her hair, kissing her forehead. She leaned into my touch, head turning to face me.

"D-d-dar-yl," she croaked, her throat dry and lips cracked. Someone moved to pour her a glass of water, but I didn't take my eyes off her.

"Yeah Red, it's me. I'm here."

Her eyelids fluttered, face scrunching up in a combination of exhaustion and effort like she was using every bit of strength she had just to open her eyes.

"Where the hell is Siddiq?" I bellowed, clutching her hand like a lifeline.

"On his way," Jesus answered immediately.

And then, without any warning, she opened her eyes. All the air was sucked out of my lungs like a punch straight to the gut. She blinked rapidly, gaze unsteady as she licked her lips. Someone handed me the water and I cupped the back of her head gently.

"Water." I lifted her slightly, allowing her a few sips of the cool liquid to quench her thirst then laid her back on the pillow. Her breathing picked up, eyes darting around the room rapidly and felt my pulse spike. "It's a'right Red. Yur safe."

"I can't..."

Her chest was heaving, her grip on my hand tightening to the point of pain, a fact that shouldn't be possible for someone who'd been unconscious for the better part of three days. Merle and I shared a concerned look. My brother took her other hand, a frown on his face. She seemed to know it was Merle and she pulled him closer, the two of us forming a shield from everyone else in the room.

I'd been praying to any God I could think of for her to wake up so I could see her eyes, but not like this. She looked so scared, so vulnerable I had the urge to protect her even though we were surrounded by friends. If anyone asked me a few seconds if there was something I wanted less than my wife being in coma I'd have said hell no, but I was wrong. Seeing her cower in fear damn near broke me.

"Can't what baby?" I probed gently.

She shook her head frantically, her entire body shaking so hard I was afraid she'd hurt herself. She turned on her side, curling into herself. I'd seen animals do the same thing when they were trying to protect themselves. Why she felt the need to be defensive made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

"I can't see."


She's back!

This is the last chapter in Daryl's POV for this particular arc. (I'm sure we'll hear more from him another time. wink wink)

We're moving into the 6-year time gap from the show. There have obviously been a lot of changes and there are more to come. Hope you all enjoy!

FYI, the song Alex is singing isAlways Remember Us This Way by Lady Gaga.

Until next time...