Nanashi woke with a start. She heard the sound of someone pounding on a door. She jumped awake, feeling suddenly so disoriented. She reached for her wind dragon instinctively, bringing it out over her neck. She clued in that she was in her and Hiei's bedroom. She saw Hiei moving from next to her on the bed to their bedroom door. She watched him open the door, stepping through it, and closing it behind himself. She rolled over on the bed, pulling herself up and summoning away her wind dragon. She stumbled on sore legs over to the door, opening it herself.
She saw Hiei talking with Touya. "...everyone's tired, except for Izo somehow," Touya was explaining. "We should burn the bodies before nightfall." He looked up over at Nanashi's appearance. His eyes went wide at the sight of her.
"What happened?" she croaked, throat feeling oddly strained. She winced, bringing her hand to her throat. "Last I remember..." Her eyes went wide in turn. "Izo?!" she gasped. She brought her shaking hands to her face. Last she recalled was him standing over her, ice sword in hand.
Hiei was over to her in an instant, looking up at her with a cautious look in his eyes. "What do you remember?"
She shook her head. "He stood over me, about to bring his sword down on me... Your leg..." she cleared her throat, wondering why it hurt like it did.
Hiei closed his eyes for a pause. "Brace yourself," he preempted.
She drew in a gasp, never quite ready when he did that. She saw the image of herself possessed by the Great Hawk Spirit, talking Izo out of his fall. Izo's breakdown and healing of the others in the aftermath. It stopped where Izo carried her away up the stairs.
She pulled a chunk of her hair into sight, shocked by the sheer whiteness of it now. "I... I prayed to her to help us... but I also cursed her... when... when I saw Izo..." She brought her hands over her face, and then down in front of her mouth. Now her sore throat made sense. "Who's...?" she started, feeling her sore throat go chalky. She looked away from Hiei and over to Touya. "Who didn't make it?" She silently hoped to herself Jin at least did, which made her feel a wash of guilt mixed with concern come over her.
"The ice maidens who attacked us are all dead. So is Risho and Jin," Touya answered. "It would have been all of us if not for Izo, and then the Great Hawk Spirit."
She looked at him, taking a moment to comprehend what he stated. She turned away from both of them, wrapping her hands around her waist, willing herself not to break down and cry. Hiei would know something was off if she did. She could feel the wait of his eyes on her. Her mind went to that question, that kiss. She should have never asked him, never delayed him. He might still be alive...
Touya kept speaking, "we're burning the bodies soon. Izo, Airi, and Haru are setting up funeral pyres for them as we speak."
Nanashi turned around, walking passed the two of them without looking at either one of them. "We should go then," she said in a hollow voice. She stepped quickly, feeling her emotions begging for release as she shoved them back down.
She made it outside, seeing Asa sitting down on the steps tiredly next to an exhausted, but freshly cleaned up Kotone. She held her newborn close, watching the pyres set up morosely. Airi and Haru sat on the steps down lower, her leaning against him. She looked up, seeing Izo, surprised at the sight of his white wings still on his back. He was finishing putting the bodies of all five ice maidens on one pyre together in the back. Risho and Jin had their own pyres closer to the front. Two other empty pyres were near theirs. She figured they were for Bakken and Gama. A camp fire burned between all the pyres.
Izo looked up just then, staring at her like he had seen a ghost. He stepped towards her, breaking out into a run. He was on her faster than expected. He wrapped his arms around her, hitting her a little too hard when he did so. She felt like the wind go knocked out of her.
"Mother... I..." he started, voice shaking. "I'm so sorry..."
"Shh," she said soothingly. "It's over now," she added comfortingly. "It's okay. It'll all be okay." She felt his emotions welling up, making her want to let hers go. She could sense Hiei watching her. She allowed her to spill over slightly, using Izo's grief to make it look that caused hers to unleash.
Izo pulled away from her when they both settled enough. He stepped away, and looked over at Touya. "They're ready, sir, just as you asked."
Touya looked like the weight of the world was placed on his shoulders. "Right then. I'll light Risho's. Izo, Bakken's. Haru, Gama's. Airi..." he started, looking over at the young woman, who shook her head, but then nodded her head. "Hiei, the ice maiden's."
Nanashi, feeling nothing to do, went over to sit down next to Asa and Kotone, watching the others. The men lit their assigned pyres with little bother from flaming sticks from the campfire. Airi was struggling though. She was crying anew, carrying the flaming stick towards her father's pyre. After hesitating only a moment, Nanashi stood up and went over to Airi, helping her. Airi seemed to recoil from help at first, but gave into Nanashi's aid.
When the pyre was lit, Airi turned away, leaning against Nanashi. Nanashi pulled her close, holding her. She felt a thought unbidden come to her mind that if she had ended up with Jin instead of Hiei, this young woman could be her daughter...
Nanashi guided her back with her to sit down on the steps near Asa and Kotone. Everyone else but Touya joined them sitting around the area. Touya spoke over the pyres, stumbling over the words at first. So fresh and unexpectedly thrust into leadership. Nanashi felt a wave of pity for him. He was now in charge of the shinobi, all four of them. Only four of them. Nanashi had heard once they were so numerous that they could rival the king's army.
Airi leaned against her, crying more when Touya spoke over her father. Nanashi allowed herself to cry only a little at that, not wanting to risk Hiei catching on in her grief for Jin. It hard to hold it back.
When Touya stopped speaking, with everyone else going silent around them. Nanashi watched the pyres, avoiding looking at Jin's. Her eyes landed on the ice maidens' pyre, watching the five sisters burn together. She wondered what would happen with the other ice maidens on their floating island if this squad never returned. They were tasked to go after Kotone or die trying. They died trying.
Touya pulled five locks of blue hairs out of his pocket. "Lore has it, anyone who defeats an ice maiden in combat, takes a lock of their hair as trophy. A sign to others, especially other ice maidens, their prowess in combat." He handed two to Hiei. "You killed one on your own." Touya went over to Jin's pyre, throwing it in the flames. He killed one, with Hiei's help." Touya went over to Izo, handing him three. "You killed three in your fall." Izo took them, looking down at them uncomfortably. Nanashi could tell he did not like be reminded of falling, just as she had back when she fell.
"What can we do with them, besides hold on to them as badges of honor?" Izo asked, still looking at them.
"Keep them with you, or give them to someone else as a sign of your protection over them," Touya explained.
Touya had barely finished his words when Hiei stepped over to Nanashi, handing her his earned lock of hair without making eye contact. Izo had stepped over to her as well, mid way to passing her one of his own. He halted his hand when she took Hiei's in hand instead. Izo shifted his feet, offering one to Kotone instead. She blinked up at him, shaking her head. She looked like she might have been offended even.
"Save yours," Hiei told him.
Izo clicked his teeth, pocketing the three locks of hair and sitting down on the steps in a bit of a huff.
When the fires were burning low, Kotone's son stirred, crying. She hummed down at him, looking over at Izo expectantly. Izo looked back over at her, rising up from where he stood. He came over to her, helping her stand up and go back into the castle together. Asa went with them, not long after.
Nanashi retired minutes after them, feeling the deep ache of exhaustion and grief wash over her. She went back to her and Hiei's rooms, showering by herself, even though she was worn out. She let herself release her emotions in the privacy of the shower, glad to at least know Hiei was not there to see or sense it. If he knew...
The water felt colder, too cold for her to handle. She turned off the water, dried off, and left the bathroom. She changed into warm pajamas, never wanting to feel cold ever again. She hated recalling the fact that winter was fast approaching. It made her miss the warm, balmy south she grew up in.
She was ready to settle herself into bed when she saw Hiei come in. He looked at her. She wrapped her arms around her waist, feeling an overwhelming wave of guilt. She could not keep it to herself. "I need to tell you something," she preempted through numb lips.
Hiei looked at her, even though she cast her gaze down. He stepped closer to her. "I know," he told her.
She looked at him, gasping. He was close to her now. "How...?" she started. Her eyes landed on his Jagan Eye, not saying anything else.
"Touya wanted to know how he died," Hiei said. She looked afraid, shaking her head nervously. "I didn't tell him that part."
"I'm sorry," she rushed out, bringing her hands to her mouth. "I didn't, I didn't mean it, he was there, and it was-" she choked, rendering herself wordless.
He stayed where he was, but said, "you were scared in the moment and did not want anyone else to die."
She could not think what to say in the moment. It was as if he knew what she had felt in the moment. He had read her mind. He did know it all. She turned away from him, laying herself down on the bed, feeling a new wave of grief batter over her. This time she allowed it to flow out of her, even if he could see it all first hand.
