Sentimental Lady Susan

Susan was feeling very sentimental when she watched the wedding rehearsal.

She had witnessed too many weddings where no love existed only money. To see couples, marry for love was truly something special. She herself had not been lucky and married a titled man who ended up being abusive. Thankfully fate intervened and he died giving her freedom. During her husband's funeral she had decided that no man would every control her again… she would do the controlling.

She had risen in her status and power using it for herself and those she loved. The Prince Regent gave her many things and loved her in his own way… she was no fool.

There had been a time in her life when she had loved someone with everything she had. She had been thinking about this man since she had known Charlotte and the Heywood's. Susan had been very disappointed with Sidney Parker who did the very thing her first love did to her. Charlotte had proven to be stronger than Susan…. healing, waiting and finding her true love.

She was now watching another dear Heywood girl marry for love.

Charlotte had seen Susan during the rehearsal and knew something was wrong. Susan was very good at hiding her feelings, but Charlotte had noticed something. She had moved so she was sitting next to Susan and looked her friend in the eyes….

"Susan… what is wrong?"

"It is nothing, my dear"

"Susan… I can tell it is more than Edward and Alison's wedding" Charlotte taking hold of her friend's hands.

"What is wrong? You know you can tell me anything?" encouraged Charlotte. She was thankful when Susan nodded.

"Let me tell you a story that not many people know about me… it was before I become Lady Worcester… but let us find a private place away from the others" Susan suggested

Charlotte telling Henry they were going to the use a side room… she didn't want him to panic. The two women walked arm in arm and found chairs to sit down. Charlotte waited patiently as she could see Susan was gaining courage to tell something very private.

Susan taking a deep breath decided she needed to tell Charlotte something about her past…

"My parents sent me to my Aunt and Uncle's for a number of months… I had just turned 17 and I was going to be presented to society during the winter season. They wanted me to make a good match and help improve our family's position. Even though I was a daughter of an Earl I had a small dowry and there were many other ladies who were ahead of me in the marriage market.

I was strong minded and at times wilful… I was sent to my Aunt to be straightened out so I would have success in London. I have to admit what she taught me helped me gain the power I now have in English society… I think she would be proud I listened to her instructions.

There was a young man who would come to visit us …he was an old school friend of my cousin. He was very handsome, and I found him intriguing. I am sure you can guess… we fell in love and I only wanted to marry him… he made every indication he would ask me to marry him"

At this point Susan had paused and looked up with tears in her eyes. Charlotte taking hold of her friend's hands. She now knew why they had instantly connected… they were similar not only in character but in experience.

Susan taking a deep breath….

"The London season began… it was exciting…. the balls… the dinners… the moments I was able to share with my love but as the season progressed his attentions started being directed towards another lady. He went onto marry a 'Miss Cordelia Grange' who had a large fortune. I was devastated and without thinking accepted the first marriage proposal presented to me. You know the abuse I suffered under my husband and it was not a happy marriage."

"Susan…. why are you thinking about this now? What has happened?" Charlotte asked with concern… she was not used to seeing her friend in this state.

"After all these years I saw him again…." She had stopped speaking and was afraid to admit her feelings.

Charlotte knew straight away who Susan meant…. "It is the Duke of Jacaranda?"

Susan nodded… grateful she did not have to speak his name.

"Why didn't you speak up when Alison suggested inviting them to Willingdon?" pushed Charlotte

"I was befuddled my dear…"

Charlotte embracing her friend and let her cry. While there was much laughter in the church Susan was reliving a time in her life she wished to forget.