Gamelover41592: Thank you

Omni Spectator (Guest): I honestly just used a randomizer to pick the order that Pit and Zoey killed the heads in. The Purple Head was my favorite as well. But yeah, I really wish that they returned later in the game.

I know last time I said this chapter was boring, but that's by the standards of Kid Icarus Uprising, meaning still a very witty chapter that was a lot of fun.


"Here we go!" Zoey cheered as she jumped out the door, Pit hot on her heels.

"So, what's our mission this time?" Pit asked.

"You remember Reapers, don't you? From the Underworld?" Palutena asked.

"Not those guys!" Pit wailed. "They're always freaking out and calling in their little Reapettes. Ugh, I'm getting worked up just thinking about it!"

"Tell us how you really feel, dad," Zoey snarked.

"Yes, anyway... About the Reapers…" Palutena said, her tone making it clear that she was not pleased about being interrupted.

"Sorry, sorry, go on," Pit replied sheepishly.

"They have a fortress near the entrance to the Underworld in Reaper Valley," Palutena revealed. Zoey burst into laughter at the name of the location.

"Wow! Did the developer who named that want to get to their lunch break faster?" She asked.

"No kidding," Pit chimed in. "Where is this place? Reaper Boulevard? But seriously, thank goodness we don't have to go there, right?" Palutena promptly went silent.

"...We're going there, aren't we?" Zoey realized.

"Will you at least tell me why you want us to go to a place crawling with Reapers?" Pit requested.

Unseen by both of them, Palutena nodded before speaking. "I'm trying to find another one of Medusa's commanders, Pandora,"

"The goddess of disaster and calamity? THAT Pandora?" Pit asked.

"Yes, and she's currently residing in the Labyrinth of Deceit... however, some force in the Reaper fortress is obscuring the labyrinth's location. I can't find it, not even with my all-seeing Eye of Palutena," Palutena explained.

"Wait, if you have an all-seeing eye, why can't you see Pandora's location?" Pit asked.

"Because of my slightly botched laser eye surgery," Palutena matter-of-factly replied.

"Mom, are you messing with us?" Zoey asked, one of her eyebrows raised.

"Maybe," Palutena bluntly answered. "Regardless, your job for now is to infiltrate the Reaper fortress!"

"R-roger that!" Pit quickly chimed in.

"Hey, what are those red dots?" Zoey asked as she pointed towards several red dots in the distance.

"Are they…" Palutena began to say, only for several lasers to blast towards Zoey and Pit. "...Reaper eyes?!"

"This is really bad!" Pit screamed as he yanked Zoey away from a few lasers, nearly losing a couple feathers in the process.

"We need to find you a safe route," Palutena said. A ravine then came into view. "Down there is your only option!"

"C'mon dad!" Zoey called out as she flew towards the ravine, Pit hot on her heels.

"This ravine should take you to the Reaper fortress. But it's tight, so be careful. If you get stuck, I won't have time to get you out," Palutena explained as Pit and Zoey continued to blast away at the enemies.

"Man, things are really heating up! Time to bust through here! Full speed ahead!" Pit declared, kicking a monster in the face.

"Excellent idea, Pit. Naturally, I had the same thought. Let me help," Palutena said as she moved Pit through the ravine. "Is that a windstorm up ahead?! Hang on!" Pit wailed in pain as he and Zoey moved through the windstorm. "Don't be such a baby. It's only wind. I mean, at least it's not poison or acid wind. Then you'd be in real trouble,"

"Ooh, lucky us," Zoey snarked.

"You're heading into a cave now. Be careful!" Palutena warned as Pit and Zoey flew into said cave. "There are many enemies ahead!"

"We'll take care of 'em!" Pit declared, Zoey already blasting away. Suddenly, there was a wall in front of them, forcing both of them to abruptly stop.

"This looks like a dead end. There must be a way out... Hmm…" Palutena said as Pit and Zoey began to look around. They all hit the same answer: the cave under them. "Down there! I'm getting you out!"

"The Underworld forces really stepped up their game!" Pit exclaimed as he dodged out of the way of several monsters.

"I doubt those underlings managed it on their own. It's a sure sign that Medusa is back in power," Palutena noted. The exit of the cave then came into view. "You're almost there! 3... 2... 1... Contact!" Pit and Zoey burst out of the cave, causing red lasers to blast away at them.

"Whoa! So much for a warm welcome!" Zoey said as she dodged out of the way.

"There's no chance of getting in from above. You'll have to break through the front," Palutena ordered.

"Here we gooooo!" Pit and Zoey both yelled out as they charged through the front door.


"Dad, are you okay?" Zoey asked once she saw Pit crash land inside the Reaper Fortress.

"Never...better…" Pit grunted as he forced himself to his feet.

"Then let's get moving. The force obscuring Pandora is deep within this fortress," Palutena ordered. Pit and Zoey nodded and headed into a door to their right. "Reapers may look all evil and crazy, but there's a good reason for that. They ARE evil and crazy. But here's a little tip: they won't bother you if you stay out of their sight,"

"You know, for a place called the Reaper fortress, there's not a lot of reapers here," Zoey noted.

"There must be a huge soul harvest going on somewhere," Palutena said sadly.

"What do you mean?" Zoey asked. While Pit and Palutena had explained a bit about the Underworld, they never explained much of it outside of the monsters being evil.

"Reapers are soul carriers. When a being dies, they take its soul to the Underworld. The humans probably started another war, which means a lot more souls to deal with," Palutena explained. Zoey covered her hands with her mouth. That was horrible!

"Why are they always fighting? It's so sad and pointless," Pit said. Zoey nodded solemnly.

"Yes, but we gods fight too, and when we do, humans are always caught in the middle," Palutena pointed out.

"So, this war against the Underworld Army is causing the Reapers to work overtime," Pit realized.

"I'M the one who should be working overtime. Then there'd be less soul harvesting... Humans get frustrated, even destructive, when we gods don't provide for their welfare," Palutena said solemnly.

"Don't be ridiculous! Everyone loves the goddess of light! You know that!" Pit replied.

"Yeah, you're awesome mom! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!" Zoey chimed in.

"Thank you, you two. I do my best. Now, then... Let's proceed," Palutena said. A few rooms down, Pit and Zoey found a grind rail.

"Yeehaw!" Zoey exclaimed as she grinded along.

"Whoa-ho-ho! Nice!" Pit cheered.

"This is a grind rail. It beats walking, huh? You can ride it right into the courtyard," Palutena told them. Even the enemies didn't stop Pit and Zoey from having an utter blast grinding along. However, Pit's joy was quickly cut short when he saw one of the enemies in the next room.

"Not this guy!" He wailed.

"An Eggplant Wizard!" Palutena exclaimed.

"A what!?" Zoey exclaimed, doing her best not to burst out laughing.

"It's nothing important!" Pit quickly said.

"During Pit's first adventure, one of the most fearsome creatures he faced was the Eggplant Wizard, which had the powers to magically transform him into a walking Eggplant," Palutena explained. Zoey did start laughing at this point, while Pit tried to make himself look small. Thankfully, he was able to kill the Wizard before getting turned into one.

"That was too close!" Pit declared.

"Don't worry, Pit." Palutena said. "If you're turned into an eggplant, my powers will transform you back. After a while,"

"Thanks, Lady Palutena!" Pit said as he and Zoey entered the next room, which was full of swinging blades.

"Those blades look like they could cut someone in half!" Zoey exclaimed.

"Be careful not to fall!" Palutena warned. Thankfully, Pit and Zoey were able to make it through without falling and continued through the fortress. "There are Reapers creeping around in there. They'll summon Reapettes if they see you, so be careful." Zoey took the chance to hide in conveniently placed gaps in the wall where she could snipe the Reapers before they could see her or Pit.

"Smart move, Zoey," Pit complimented.

"Well, one of us has to be," Zoey replied.

"True that," Pit agreed, only to realize what he said. "HEY!" Zoey just burst into laughter yet again.

"You're closing in on the force that's obscuring Pandora's location," Palutena said.

"Yeah, we figured the evil lighting wasn't just for show," Pit replied as he and Zoey looked around at all the guillotines and evil lighting.


"That's it? One Reaper?" Zoey questioned once she and Pit entered the boss chamber. Suddenly, the Reaper noticed them and turned giant.

"No way!" Pit exclaimed.

"It's gigantic!" Palutena exclaimed.

"What IS that thing?" Zoey cried.

"That Great Reaper must be the one who's hidden Pandora's Labyrinth of Deceit. This area is split into two levels, so just switch levels depending on how it attacks," Palutena explained.

"You say that like it's easy!" Pit exclaimed.

"That's because it IS easy!" Palutena replied.

"I'm guessing those eyes aren't just for giving us flirty looks," Zoey said as she blasted away. "Lemme guess—they're death rays?!"

"In a nutshell. Plus, if you get hit, it'll summon Reapettes. That Great Reaper has quite the evil eye," Palutena said.

"How can you make puns at a time like this?!" Pit wailed. He had gotten hit and had Reapettes coming after him.

"I guess I just don't SEE the problem with a little levity," Palutena joked.

"Ugh! You're killing us here!" Pit called out.

"I think I've found the Great Reaper's weak points. They're its head and little toes," Palutena revealed.

"Oh, yeah! Stubbing those guys hurts like crazy!" Pit agreed.

"But it's more effective to target the head. The head is a weak spot for many enemies and...most living things," Palutena said.

"No kidding," Zoey grumbled. Suddenly, she had an idea. "Dad, aim for the head and I'll hit the toes!" It worked flawlessly. The Great Reaper fell quickly.

"All done!" Both cheered.

"Nice work!" Palutena cheered.

"You know what, Lady Palutena?" Pit began as he and Zoey began to walk away.

"What's that, Pit?" Palutena asked.

"Even though I almost died, I've really enjoyed our time together," Pit admitted.

"Yeah, it's the craziest family bonding time in history," Zoey jokingly agreed.

"Alright you two, let's bond some more and go find Pandora!" Palutena said as she brought both back to Skyworld.


This chapter might be boring, but it has some of the best dialogue between Palutena and Pit. Anyways, next time, we're hunting down Pandora!