A/N: Hey hey hey! It's Thursday! Time for an update! I'm sure all of this happy mostly angst-free stuff is just going to keep on keeping on forever, right? That trip to Dallas is just going to be a great big fluff fest! Right? RIGHT?! :P (We call that foreshadowing in the biz. Really blatant and clunky and terrible foreshadowing. Also, lying. I think it's called that, too. And I don't belong to a biz. People should really stop letting me write author's notes.)

Chapter 18

Distractions

I woke up a few weeks later with a scream stuck in my throat. Eric was dead in bed beside me. I shook him and slapped him and screamed at him until he muttered something and turned over. Thank goodness.

I couldn't remember anything about it other than the last few seconds before I woke up. I was standing right next to the bed with one of my stakes, and I…

I got up and ran to the bathroom and puked. It had been so fucking real. He had gushed and then just… flaked apart. I threw up again, and then used the bathroom and washed my hands and face and brushed my teeth and climbed back into bed. I couldn't bear to leave him after that.

When he finally opened his eyes, hours later, I said, "I love you."

He kissed my forehead. "I love you, too, Sookie. What is the matter?"

"I just had a really bad dream."

"Well, my love, would you like to be distracted into forgetting all about it?" He kissed me, but after a minute, I pulled away.

"Um. I don't really feel sexy at all right now. I'm sorry."

Well, that wasn't like me at all. He looked concerned. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

"I don't know." I took a deep breath. "I dreamed that I staked you."

"Well, I understand why you're upset, but Sookie… You know that you would never stake me. And I would never let myself be staked."

"You were dead for the day. Defenseless. It seemed so real. You just gushed blood and then started to… dissolve almost, but dry. Like the way burnt logs can kind of flake apart in chunks."

His forehead wrinkled. "That is actually a fairly accurate description of what happens when a vampire is first staked. But I'm sure you've seen it depicted in a movie or overheard it in a thought and have since forgotten."

I didn't really think it was likely, but I also didn't want to talk about it any more, so I kept my mouth shut and shrugged.

And then he kissed me again. Apparently, he was in the mood, regardless of my disturbing dream. Or maybe he just wasn't that disturbed by it. I was. It was replaying over and over in my head. But getting it off my chest had definitely helped, and I thought that maybe I could be distracted after all. I certainly would love to be.

And speaking of my chest, his hand was on it, his thumb stroking over my nipple. "Your breasts are magnificent."

"So you've mentioned. Your ass is spectacular." I wiggled my arm under him, grabbed his butt with both hands, and squeezed.

"As is yours. I just might sink my teeth into it later."

It turns out, he did. Eventually. After he made love to me slowly, and then took me hard and fast from behind. And it really did drive the dream almost right out of my head.

After we had worn each other out, I said, "Eric, can you please teach me to drive today?" I figured the busier the better for tonight. I didn't want to have too much time to think.

"Certainly. That is an excellent idea. We also need to pack; we are going to Dallas for a mission tomorrow night."

Dallas. It had been a long time since I'd been that far south. I didn't know whether I was looking forward to this or not. "What's the mission?"

"Potential arms deal. Saudis. Meeting a contact at a Dallas Cowboys football game." No, I was definitely looking forward to this.

"Oh, sweet! I haven't watched a football game in 11 years! This is going to be awesome! Who are they playing?"

"Well, I'm glad that one of us is looking forward to it, at least. I believe they are playing The Saints."

"No fucking way!"

"Yes fucking way. And are we going to discuss the fact that you finally told me that you love me?"

Oh, shit. I had wanted to say it. I had even tried, over and over again. But the words always seemed to stick in my throat. It wasn't that he was more mushy than I was, or even that he meant it more than I did. I was pretty fucking sure that wasn't even possible. Unfortunately, he was just stronger than me. I was a great big clucking fucking chicken. I had managed a 'me too'. Once.

"Actually, I was really hoping not to."

"Aah. Of course. Well, I was hoping to. Or, I suppose, I could take hearing it again, at least."

"Ok, Mr. Needy. I love you. I've been in love with you probably since the night I met you, but it took three or four nights to actually admit it to myself. There. Are you happy now?" I crossed my arms and sulked. This shit was scary and I kind of hated it. Or maybe I hated how much I loved it.

"Yes, lover, I am very happy now." He kissed me until I had no choice but to be all warm and fuzzy and happy and melty inside. Damn him.

"I expect to hear it again, once in a while."

I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed and tickled me until I said it a few more times. Jerk.

We went out to the garage, and he got into the driver's side of the Crown Vic. I got into the driver's side of the Corvette. Neither one of us closed the door.

"Oh, no."

"Oh, yes."

"No, Sookie. I am not teaching you how to drive in my Corvette."

"No, you totally are."

"I most certainly am not."

"If you do, you can do me on the hood..."

"Sookie."

"Me all naked and splayed out in the moonlight…"

"This isn't going to work."

I sing-songed, "I might even let you do butt stuff."

He laughed out loud at that. "As tempting as that offer is, my sweet, I am going to have to decline."

"But automatics are boring. I know what I'm doing, Eric. I've been watching people drive from inside their brains since I was born, practically. And my Daddy always said that I should learn to drive on a standard." Plus, Noam liked to race cars, and had even done some stunt driving back in Israel. I really wanted to test drive that little bit of knowledge.

He sighed. Oh, man. That was a good sign. He said, "Get out. I will be driving until we get somewhere with fewer… obstacles."

Oh, brother. But I wasn't going to complain! The thing is, he just liked to spoil his girls. Pam liked expensive clothes and shoes and jewelry, and the occasional opportunity to maim and torture. I liked getting my own fucking way.

He drove us out to an old airstrip. Ok, I certainly wasn't going to run into anything out here. He was convinced I was going to demolish his baby. On the other hand, I had a lot of road to work with. And no potential cops or traffic or anything. I could open it up all the way.

"2001 Corvette Z06. 620 Horsepower?"

He raised his eyebrow. "Yes..."

"Top speed of 170 miles per hour?"

"Yes."

"0-60 in four seconds?"

"Yes. Sookie, how do you know all of this?"

"Noam is a car guy. Now scram. You're in my seat."

"Sookie, we need to go over a few things first."

He blabbed on and on about the minutiae of driving. If he wasn't so hot, I would have been bored stiff. As it was, I mostly just imagined us screwing our brains out. Man, apparently I was just like everybody else. Filthy.

Finally, he moved and I got to sit in the driver's seat. He was being blabby again, but I listened and got my seat and mirrors all adjusted.

"Ok, Sookie. Push down the clutch, turn on the engine, and shift the car into first gear. Then slowly let up on the clutch until the car starts to roll. Then you can give it a little gas."

I looked at him and grinned. I pushed down the clutch, turned the key, and we were fucking off. Zero to sixty in four seconds. Hot damn!

It didn't take much longer to get it up to 130. Eric was losing his fucking mind, and I couldn't stop laughing like a lunatic.

I slammed on the brakes, put the car into a spin, downshifted, and we were soon flying back in the other direction. I skidded to a stop within inches of where we had started. "How'd I do, Boss?"

"Sookie… How in the fuck did you know how to do that?"

Oh, shit. I did not think this through. "As I said, Noam is a car guy. He was showing off when he drove me across the complex once, and I read his mind."

The lie just poured out. I almost felt like I was watching myself from above, as if it wasn't really me who was saying it. I had, of course, downloaded Noam's personal car and driving databases and mental manuals into my brain. But those manuals were my secret, the results of hours upon hours of research. I hated that I was keeping this from him, but my gut was apparently screaming at me to do so. And I was frankly scared not to listen to it. This smooth lying almost autonomous voice had saved my ass over and over again. And it had even helped me pass a polygraph once. Self-preservation was a hell of a thing.

"Can you actually drive at a reasonable speed and obey traffic laws?"

I drove down the airstrip and back, displaying my knowledge of the fundamentals. I even did a perfect three point turn over top of the skid marks from last time. He quizzed me a little, on rules of the road and traffic signs and parts of a car, and I was able to answer everything to his satisfaction.

"Alright. Time to get out,"

"Come on, Eric. Let me drive back! I have a license as part of my cover. I even have it with me."

"Yes, you can drive home. But I believe I was promised… What was it again? Oh, yes. Butt stuff on the hood first."

Oh, shit. "I said I might let you do butt stuff on the hood. And you declined! But we don't have any lube here, anyhow. What a shame."

He pulled some out of the glove compartment and wiggled it at me, with a great big grin on his face. Well, damn.