Chapter 33:

The undead stood in a packed mass before the gates, tempting the Ice Queen to put an end to the madness all at one shot. She had the power. She could have frozen them so deeply they would have simply shattered. And potentially bring us into war with Princess Beautiful, thought Simone Mertens. That was the thing she had to remember here. Anything she did could incite a war with an undead Lord, and while Princess Beautiful's capacity to do anything serious to the civilized kingdoms had been neutralized by the Tesla Barrier, there were still a lot of innocents beyond the wall who would suffer.

"Are you ready," Simone asked? "Nope," Roselinen replied, "but that hardly matters. It still has to get done." Reaching out, the tall woman said, "take my hand. Hold tight." They were going to fly. The idea that they were going to actually fly through the air was terrifying and thrilling all at once. Gathering her courage, the plush pillow-person took the tall wizard's hand, gripping it tight.

And then they were flying.

There was no word of warning. Simone drew on her powers and vaulted into the air. The sensation was both frightening and exhilarating. Roselinen found herself with the urge to look down, but she fought that urge with every fiber of her being, knowing that she'd lose her nerve and let go if she did. The air rushing past was cold, even inside her jacket and with her woolens on under her skirt. All too soon, though, the moment was over. Simone brought them down in the center of the village, alighting there on the square.

Roselinen stared around her in a state of shock, fear, and excitement. Strangely, her mind went to Lord Woolcot's wife, Persemon. Though she'd never met the woman in person, she'd seen her. Persemon was her best reference for what it meant to be a King's wife. Bet she's never done anything like this, thought the pillow-person. "I checked," Simone said. "The undead are all outside of town." Now or never, thought Rosie. Settling herself in the center of the square, the plump woman reached deep inside herself, conjuring an image of a beautiful spring day in her home village–the day she and Finn got married.

Outside the village, the air shimmered and wavered. And then the refugee village was gone. At The Wall, a sally-port opened, and a single terrified soldier stepped out. Standing before the milling undead, the slime person announced, "the Matriarch will meet with your mistress." With those words delivered, the soldier beat a hasty retreat, with the sally-port door slamming behind him.

Inside the refugee village, Simone hovered over her former rival, as she felt Roselinen exert her strange power. You couldn't have told the toll it was taking on the pillow-person from the way she looked. "It's done," Rosie announced. "Are you able to manage this," Simone asked? Nodding, Rosie said, "you should leave now. I'll firm the bubble up when you're gone." Simone rested a comforting hand on her shoulder for a moment, then the Ice Queen vaulted into the sky, soaring out of the village. When she no longer felt Simone's presence, Roselinen focused her thoughts and walled the village out of the world it had sat in.

In the far east, Finn the King exited Sonbong's palace with his entourage in tow. Jake had said not a word at finding Reese in bed with him. More to the point, she was in a much better mood today. She was smiling and joking, much as she always had. Today, she was wearing a sexy silk shirt that was almost transparent over a pale grey bra with a red mini and heels. As they strolled down the stairs to the coach for the ride down to the beach, they were holding hands, with Jake clinging to him, and she smelled so nice. "Did you have a good night," Finn asked? "I could ask you the same," Jake retorted. Finn blushed.

Behind them, Reese was burning a hole in Jake's back. She'd gotten dicked. She had the sore pussy to prove it. Now it felt like she'd just as quickly been dumped. "I saw Charlie," Finn announced. "I... offered to help her out." With a sigh, his girlfriend replied, "she's... I dunno' what's wrong... It's like... she's mad about something." "We'll get it worked out, Jake," Finn said. He always sounded optimistic. He never sounded as if he was down and out and hopeless. It was a breath of fresh air for her.

"Keep your eyes on Reese," Finn said, as they approached the bottom of the stairs. It was pitched low, for her ears only. Jake glanced up at him, but Finn's face was placid. Nope, he might have fucked the shit out of her and left her walking bow-legged, but he didn't trust her. This was going to get very interesting. Fast.

If the sight of the King holding hands with that fucking mongrel wasn't enough of a slap for the wax-hustler, more was coming. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she found that the Truth Kingdom Princess was already waiting there in the carriage. There was no space for her unless she wanted to ride up top with the driver. Indeed, Finn offered Jake and Bonnie a hand up as they climbed into the carriage, climbing after them as soon as they were settled. Reese was left there in the courtyard.

Princess Sakura announced, "I sent the message you asked for, Finn. I don't know if she'll respond." "She'll answer," Finn replied. Who she was, the pair didn't say. Jake absorbed all of it with calm. Bonnie was edge-of-her-seat excited. This trip had something to do with taking down Nagoono. This mysterious acquaintance of her father's had the power to help them. Of course, her father was, for some reason, keeping his cards very close to his chest.

The carriage rolled out of the town and down along the river, headed for the coast. As they rode, the King talked about pleasant things. He wanted to make plans to get the family together–all of them–in the Sun Coast. He'd always wanted to do that. Bonnie, who'd gotten a couple of days there with her mom, was excited by the idea. Beyond the few days they'd been there after the assassination attempt, Jake had never been there either. It was one of the things she had Billy had talked about in their endless drowsy conversations in bed, but neither the cop nor his gangster wife had the money for that kind of travel.

Frowning in puzzlement, Bonnie asked, "isn't that why you became a gangster?" Jake's face went red hot, and Finn felt her tense. "It's not like you think," the shapechanger rumbled. "It's... It's never like anybody thinks." Like so much of the world, it was much more complicated than the average person could manage to understand. Stepping into the looming row, Finn explained, "the people at the bottom do it because a lot of them made mistakes when they were growing up, Bonnie. When you didn't finish school or you accidentally got your girlfriend preggers, you need money, but you don't have what it takes to hold down a good job."

Warming to the topic, the big man said, "like with everything else, there are bigger fish out there waiting to take advantage of the small fish. They know that what you're doing is illegal. They keep the law off your back... for a piece of the action." With a heavy-hearted sigh, Jake admitted, "some of us get into it because we're lazy. It's... it's easier to steal from somebody's purse or pocket or boost stuff from a store or truck than it is to get up every morning with the sun and go plow a field." But the money was only so-so at the bottom of the pile. If you wanted more, you usually had to sell your soul to the devil to get it.

Slipping an arm around Jake, the King smiled and said, "and sometimes you save the world from having a city fall on it and rescue the King's kids from being squashed by their grandma in his throne-room. Then, you get a pardon..." "And maybe a new boyfriend," Bonnie chuckled. Jake flushed to her hair. Turning to her man, she leaned over and kissed his cheek.

Arriving at the seashore at the mouth of the river, the quartet got out of the carriage. This was the place. Finn found himself taking in the scent of sea air. He loved the sea. He just didn't like being out on it. As they waited, Bonnie found herself taking with the urge to run her toes through the sand. Slipping off her shoes, she did just that. Ooo was a beautiful land, and though she missed the old village, she was growing less and less homesick every day. Most of her friends were gone anyway.

As the pillow-person frolicked, a strange shape rose from the waters. Jake called out to Finn's daughter, and Bonnie looked up in time to see a strange half-woman, half-fish crawl up on the beach. She was curvy, and she wore a sarong around her hips and a shell bra over her chest. Her pale blue-green skin had the appearance of scales, and she had kelp-green hair. As Bonnie watched, the strange woman shimmered in the light, and then suddenly she had legs. Magic, Bonnie thought.

Finn walked down to meet her. The strange woman looked down her nose at him and announced, "the Lady of the Sea will hear you. Do you accept the Mermaid's Kiss?" "I do," Finn agreed. Holding up a hand to forestall Jake's terrified reaction, the King said, "hang out. I told them to bring out dinner. I'll be back." Striding forward, he bowed before the stranger. The strange woman kissed him on the forehead. The big man took her hand, as she walked into the water once more.

Back in the west, the massed ranks of undead parted to reveal the terrifying visage of the undead Princess Beautiful. In eerie silence, the enigmatic creature marched up to the gates of the Grey Forest and stopped. Moments later, the sally-port door opened, and a small number of nymphs stepped out, carrying chairs and a table of all things. They set those items up there in the middle of the road before the massive iron gates and waited.

Moments passed into eternity in dreadful silence. Nobody spoke. Finally, after a pause that had all the terrified nymphs' hearts beating fast and hard, two more stepped out of the sally-port. The Ice Queen and the Matriarch of the Forest strode forward, side by side, taking the seats before the table simultaneously. You might have been forgiven for thinking they'd rehearsed it.

Where is Finn, Princess Beautiful demanded? "The King is detained with matters of state," the Ice Queen responded. Where is Finn, the undead howled?! Her mental voice was painfully loud. The Ice Queen's eyes blazed with pale fire and the temperature dropped a dozen degrees. In tones that belied that unpleasant act, the wizard calmly replied, "the King is detained with matters of state."

Resting her hands on the table, Emeraude the Matriarch said, "you have come seeking parley. What would you have of the Kingdoms of Ooo?" I want what was taken returned, Princess Beautiful grated. I want the takers brought to me. Motioning to the seat before the table, the Matriarch suggested, "why don't you sit down? Dismiss your army. We're talking." There will not be peace until I have what is mine, responded the undead Princess. "You haven't even told us what it is," Simone retorted. "Is it bigger than a bread-box by chance?" The dead woman screeched at her, but the Ice Queen was unmoved.

You can't hide that town forever, Princess Beautiful muttered. "Perhaps I destroyed it," Simone retorted. "It was a town full of undesirables, else we should have brought them beyond the wall." The undead took three steps forward and loomed over the table. "I am the King's Hand in his absence," Simone growled. "Perhaps I might release the machine army... Or perhaps we can talk about what was stolen and ways to find the thieves." In sweet tones, the Matriarch said, "have a seat. I had them bring a cushion in the Royal Purple. It's really comfy."

Glancing at the Matriarch's entourage, the undead muttered, I won't speak in front of them! Twirling a finger in her hair, the Matriarch motioned for her bodyguards to leave. With Simone at her side, she wasn't afraid of this creature. The handful of guards were delighted to leave–all but Voletta, who was very unhappy to leave the King's wives outside the gate with thousands of slavering undead monsters. The sally-port door shut behind the two Royal Wives, leaving them alone with their unpleasant guest.

Folding her hands on the table, Simone Mertens murmured, "so..." They stole my mushroom bombs, hissed the madwoman before her. They're mine! They've been handed down to me over centuries, and I will see those who took them punished! I will shred their skin! I will rend their flesh... "You can't even tell me where they went or who took them," Simone interrupted. "Maybe we should stay on topic."

Far to the west, across the sea, a small ship sailed up a vast river, taking the turns in response to the commands of a pilot, working up past the river's shifting sandbars and dangerous sunken trees. On the deck, a nymph with pale purple skin stared uneasily at the shadowy banks as they glided by in the darkness. She didn't understand why her grandmother was coming back to this place. She didn't understand the need to risk the treachery of the dangerous specter of Boom Town.

Closer now, and they could see the shadow-shapes of structures leaning drunkenly in the darkness–the forgotten legacy of a lost civilization. One of her predecessors had been fool enough to brave those abandoned streets. She'd been found quite dead and frozen to her bones in the wrack and ruin of the long-dead city. Arsenia's grandmother had simply stepped over the corpse and moved on. Darker rumors suggested that Cenobia had sent her former bodyguard into the wastes as punishment for some transgression.

The ship finally glided to a halt, with the sails furled at the pilot's command. The crew swung into action, getting the anchor dropped and mooring lines paid out. Arsenia watched a few minutes, before heading for the stairs down to the cabins. She could hear her grandmother humming to herself inside her cabin, as she approached. The Captain of the Lady's Guard stopped, gathered her wits, and knocked politely. "My Lady," she announced, "we've arrived. The skiff is being prepared."

The door opened, and the unpleasant visage of her grandmother stared back, her dark eyes burning into Arsenia's. The younger woman offered her evil elder a bow. "We are ready to take you ashore when you desire," she said. Straight and to the point. Don't give her a reason for anger.

Her wicked grandmother came out wearing a diaphanous gown that you might have seen at a donkey show in one of the bars. Even for a nymph, it was risque. Her face was done up, and she looked like she was looking for dick. She might have been if the man in question hadn't been fucking dead for centuries. Brushing past Arsenia, the curvy nymph went up the stairs to the deck. Arsenia wasted no time in following. She had to go ashore, even if she was scared shitless of being in this town of the damned.

The evil town was jumping when the skiff pulled up to one of the docks. Music wafted from one of the innumerable dance-halls and titty-bars that filled Boom Town. Confident and assured, Cenobia climbed off the skiff and onto dry land, stepping off down the dock like she owned the place. Arsenia fell in at her back, her eyes alive to the sights of drunken pirates wandering the streets, laughing and singing off-key. There was even a lively brawl on one of the street-corners with a dozen men squaring off with clubs and even knives.

This wasn't the place for a nymph–not one who didn't want to end up shaking her ass or worse in some other person's hostel. They had no power here. Arsenia's every sense screamed that they should get the hell back to the ship, get her turned around, and get the hell back down that river. Yet, her grandmother walked about as if she owned the place. One itinerant pirate did, in fact, look on the older woman as if she was a nice piece of ass to wet down his cock, but when he got close enough for a better look, he immediately turned and walked away, looking as though he'd seen a ghost.

The nasty harridan led the way unerringly across the town's small patch of high-ground until they came to the patchwork of worn and half-rotten boards and corduroy walkway that marked the fishing shacks and hovels that housed their spectral pirate and his buffalo-man slaves. It was only when they were here that Cenobia stopped. Snapping her fingers, she summoned her granddaughter, directing her to walk out onto the boards ahead of her. The humiliated soldier took a deep-breath and stepped out onto the rickety, rotten structure, her heart beating a mile a minute.

Cenobia fell in at the little bitch's back, stepping carefully and lightly over the boards, giving her bodyguard directions as one who knew the way very well. In less than fifteen minutes, they'd reached the abode of Whiskey Pete–a rickety, ramshackle rum-house in the middle of the fetid swamp that was Boom Town. "Wait here," she announced, as she brushed past her idiot bodyguard. Arsenia stood outside, while her wicked grandmother went into that den of devils, doing her best to look innocuous and unoffensive as she could. She wanted one thing more than any other–to get out of here with her life.

Inside, Cenobia felt the pull of the charm about her neck keenly. She'd felt the tug almost since her ship had entered the mouth of the river. Now, it was powerful and insistent. Following that ethereal pull, the evil nymph strolled across the floor of the bar, with every eye in the place watching. Up on the stage, slave girls from the pirate-isles danced and cavorted, showing off their glistening, oiled skin. A couple of the more piggish pirates in the audience were actually stroking their filthy meat-sticks as they watched. One or two leered at the nymph–until they saw the glowing pendant hanging between her breasts. Walking into the darkened alcove at the back of the room, Cenobia grasped the chair there and sat down.

"What brings you, Cenobia," the pirate's harsh voice hissed? "Running down errands," the nymph responded. "Need a new servant. I'm also looking for information on what's going on here on the mainland." The evil pirate responded, "what do you bring me?" The nymph considered that a moment. This was always the sticky part. She'd had to give him her bodyguard the last time she was here. The bitch outside had value, but Cenobia wasn't quite ready to part with her yet.

Leaning forward, she replied, "information. There's something on the order of ten-thousand humans getting shipped through our territory." "Humans," the pirate growled? "Yes," Cenobia replied. "There are still humans in the world. Apparently, a supply of them has been found. They're up north... not far off the river, actually. But it's a bit cold there. Their master intends to move them. Some of them are coming this way, to go over the seas through my domain... bound for Coca Kingdom in the south."

The evil pirate hissed hair-curling profanity. "I know where they're t'be shipped from," he growled, his voice sounding almost demonic. "Do-tell," Cenobia replied. As she listened, the evil specter told her of the request of his neighbor in Stilt-Town. The so-called Lady of the Lake had asked to increase the amount of water she took from his river. It had hardly made sense, when she'd been doing all she could to avoid doing business with him. Now he saw. Nodding, Cenobia replied, "it would make sense. She's got the only port that Finn the Human would trust in these parts."

"Heard that name before," rumbled Whiskey Pete. Nodding, Cenobia agreed, "he's an annoying do-gooder from the far side of the world. I've had the misfortune of meeting his son, William. He's been making dangerous moves, my dear fellow. He's moving against us. He'll be in your drawers soon enough."

The pirate's evil visage emerged from the shadows, as he leaned towards her. "A stranger killed one of my dogs, up on'a beach," growled Whiskey Pete. His eyes burned with a hellish green fire. "He'd waylayed that bitch, Kate. Was bringing her t'me. Feller come into their village... froze a man solid there on the village green. My dog was so scared shitless, he moved the whole damned village. It took me weeks t'find them again."

He'd sanctioned them all for their cowardice, slaughtering dozens and leaving the rest to starve. "William," Cenobia replied. "That would be Prince William." It sounded like what the Ice Prince would do. He was just as disgustingly noble as his father. "Prince is it," growled the ghost? "I'll have his liver out and cooked for supper!" Cenobia smiled. That was what she liked to hear. Moving the conversation onward, she asked, "what shall we do?" "Been making inroads with that little whore who runs with Kate," the pirate growled. So far, it had proven useless. He'd never been able to lure the pirate into the swamps to dispose of, and his dogs didn't have the courage to conquer Stilt Town.

Cenobia knew who he was talking about. One of her people was rumored to be the right-hand of the Lady of the Lake. In spite of who he was talking to, he frequently referred to nymphs as 'whores'. Cenobia couldn't have cared less. She had enough power that she would never be anybody's whore. What irritated her was that this Cameron had never bothered to reach out to her own people. There was bank to be made on thousands of human slaves. If enough of them were pretties like Prince William, they would fill the Confederation's coffers for decades. "We shall see about that," she growled. Cameron would be helping them. Or else.

On the far side of the world, their implacable foe gave vent to a bout of sneezing. "Somebody must be talking about me," he rumbled. His host sniffed in irritation. She'd been cunty since he'd been brought into her presence. Moving on, Finn said, "I wish I had the time to stay and talk a while. It's been a bit..." That set her off, and she went on a tear, shouting at him for breaking his sworn word for a long five minutes. She came very close to swearing at him.

"Haryati," Finn interrupted, "you do realize that I was married, right?" The irritated mermaid glared at him. Nodding, the big man said, "I found myself with two wives and three kids and a pile of bills. My dick of a nephew threatened to put me and my family out of our house because he was mad at his dad and wanted somebody to punish, and every penny that didn't go to the kids' education, clothes, and food, went on paying off the mortgage on our house as fast as I could do it. There was no money to go halfway around the world, even to keep a promise." Her face flushed, and she glanced away.

"You could have had all the money you wanted," she muttered. Finn barely checked himself from rolling his eyes. "You could have been emperor years ago," she insisted. "I didn't fit that life," the big man reminded her, "and I was blessed to be able to see it." "Then why now," she demanded? With a sigh, the King of Ooo replied, "because people like Nagumo haven't given me much of a choice. I didn't want the world, but I had to realize that the Nagumos of the world would never let me enjoy the little piece of it that was mine."

Blowing out a breath, she demanded, "what... What do you want?" "Not much, Finn said. "I just need to keep Nagumo from escaping. He's escaped me by sea before. I need to borrow the Kraken..." "Just like that," she sniffed. In wheedling tones, Finn said, "I just need him not to run off to do this to somebody else, Haryati... I'm not asking you to go to war." His overly polite host muttered some unlady-like riddley raddly ragglesnatzes under her breath. An upright woman would never be caught swearing, after all. Finn played the part of an upright man by not calling her on it. "Alright, "she said.

The sun had already set when Finn finally walked back up the beach from the water. It had fascinated him the first time he'd visited the domain of the Ocean Princess. It was crazy to walk around in water and never get wet. Jake had been excited by the whole business when Finn had told him about the experience. By that time of his life, he and Jake hadn't traveled or worked together in years. Finn had gone home and shared the story with his brother. He'd been planning to come back. He'd promised Haryati to return. Then the Ice King had dumped Simone on his doorstep, and his whole life changed.

The big man found his girlfriend and daughter snoozing against each other on the beach beside a raging fire. Sakura was sitting before the fire, warming herself. "How did it go," she asked, as she watched him approach? "She was pissed off at me," Finn said, "but we worked through it. She'll do what I need." He owed her a favor, of course, but that was to be expected. Half of the way his Empire worked was the little favors he traded with friends.

It was time to get back to the palace. Kneeling beside his girlfriend and daughter, the big man gently woke the pair. Yawning, Jake greeted him with a kiss. "Hey, baby," she burbled, "did it go ok?" "Yeah," he said. "Got what I needed. Let's get in." Reaching out, he levered his daughter and girlfriend to their feet. They put out the fire and climbed back into the carriage.

They were all in a pretty good mood as they rolled through the early evening darkness. Dinner had been awesome, consisting of fresh-caught fish, fried up and laid out on a bed of spicy wild rice. "Too bad you missed it," Jake teased. Finn's stomach was rumbling. There hadn't been much time for eating, while he'd been chatting with Haryati. Pinching his belly, the big man said, "I'm fat enough now, babe." It was a small lie.

Arriving at the palace, they found Reese waiting up on them on the stairs. As the quartet got down out of the carriage, she came sauntering down, looking the business in a short purple dress, who's hemline danced with every step she took. To Bonnie's eyes, it almost looked like Reese was trying to win her daddy–going hard at Jake.

"Your Majesty," she greeted him, as she reached the bottom of the stairs. "Reese," Finn replied. "I have news," she said. "We're hearing chatter that Nagumo has reached out to Gumbald about an alliance. Nothing concrete... yet." "That's dangerous," Jake burbled, her eyes flicking to Finn. This didn't make sense to her. Finn suspected this woman of maybe not being on their side. Why? And, if she was, why would she tell them this? "Let's talk about it inside," Finn said. He wanted to get himself a snack. As Bonnie watched in bemusement–and Sakura stared in shock–Finn went up the stairs with his right hand on Jake's ass and his left on Reese's.

Meanwhile, back outside the gates of the Grey Forest, Simone alit in the village of refugees to find Roselinen sitting on a bench with a platter of food in her lap. It had been quite the day. "I trust that things went well," the pillow-person asked? "I could ask the same," Simone replied. Nodding at the people of the village, she said, "when they found out who I was and what I was doing, they pitched in to take care of me. I was probably better off than you..." With the bubble dismissed, she was cold again. Indeed, the people of the village had been enjoying their false spring. Now, they were back on the cusp of winter once more.

"She went home," Simone sighed. "She blustered and threatened, but we talked her down off the ledge, and she went home." It was, more or less, just as Rosie had hoped. "Do we know what was taken," she asked? Nodding, Simone said, "not here..." Dangerous, then, thought the pillow-woman. Rising, Rosie put aside the remnant of the platter, thanking her hosts for their help. It was time to go. There was a bed in the Matriarch's palace with her name on it. It would be nice to find herself there for a bit.

Ice Queen and Huntress sure can take care of business. Wonder what the King plans to do with a kraken? Hmm? And Cenobia sure seems like one of those people who need killing.