October 22; 8:31am

Joking around and getting to know more about their newest teammate was something she was glad she did. Dixie talked over two hours after dinner with Zatar, though she felt guilty for leaving the magic-user out of the dark, not telling him anything about the training simulation the team was placed in, she was refreshing to talk to someone who wasn't treating her like they were walking on eggshells. The magic-user especially entertained her with their conversation about the English language.

After their call, the magic-user having to go to bed because of his father's strict sleep schedule, Dixie finally called in Tim to spend the rest of the night with. The two of them watching some television which led to the two of them pointing out whatever was wrong and unbelievable about the show. Jason later joined them after his patrol with Bruce, the youngest brother complaining about how he wasn't invited before inviting himself in her room by sitting on the empty space on the bed beside her, Dixie now sitting in between her two brothers. The three of them dozed off with the television playing but when she wakes up in the dead of the night, it's to someone closing the television before throwing the blanket over the three of them, she felt someone brush her hair lulling her back to sleep.

"It was totally you," Jason sassed, pointing his fork at their oldest brother. "No point in even hiding it, bet you even got jealous cause you weren't invited."

Damian rolled his eyes, scoffing. "Unlike you, I'm don't get jealous over petty things."

Both Dixie and Tim watched in amusement as their two other brothers continue to bicker. Tim chuckling which led Dixie to start chuckling as well. The room quiets down and the thirteen-year-old stops her chuckling to look at why the noise quieted down only to see her brothers looking straight at her.

"Can you guys not?" She sighs, the light-hearted feeling she had now disappeared, feeling gloomy once more. She starts to pick at her food, her appetite now gone.

"Sorry," Jason whispered under his breath. "It's just that it was the first time we heard you laugh, much less smile. Last night was the first but it didn't feel real."

"Well it was, stop making it such a big deal," Dixie said, her voice soft. The four of them kept quiet, the mood now somber. After five minutes, Dixie pushed herself getting up from the dining table, tired and wanting to get away from the awkward tension in the room. "I'm going to call Wally," she murmurs, leaving the room.

She doesn't wait for her brothers' reply, already out the door before they could say anything. Truth be told, she hasn't talked to anyone on the team besides Zatar. Every time she thought of the rest of the team, she always starts zoning back to what happened in the simulation.

She remembers the way she stood there, frozen as Artemis is shot by the laser.

She remembers the feeling when Wally told her that Aqualad was gone, leaving it for her to be the leader.

She remembers sending Conner to his death, the way he listened to her with so much loyalty and trust.

She remembers seeing the grief consuming Wally as he finds out her lies, making him believe that everyone was still alive.

She especially remembers M'gann's words.

"She's offering you as a sacrifice! Aqualad would never do that."

She remembers the feeling of death and yet that's not what haunts her because even with the feeling of death, she would never forget the way she shut down, offering up all her teammates— her friends, people she would call her family, in order to save a world where she would be last to die among all of them, making sure to lead them all to success even if costed all their lives.

Dixie hurries up the stairs and into the room before crumbling to the ground, her legs weak. She covers her mouth, trying to muffle her sobs but it was futile.

All the training that her father put her through, all the things her brothers taught her, all the lives she was unable to save, it was all crashing down on her. Four years in and this is what makes her realize what her father has been training her to do, what he's been preparing her for.

She wasn't supposed to feel for her teammates, no, they were merely assets for her. They're supposed to be people she can fight alongside because of a similar goal, she wasn't supposed to confide in them, wasn't supposed to let them get to know her. They weren't supposed to be her family, not even friends, just mere acquaintances. They were only tools that would help her reach her goal, be able to cast them aside, and only work with them when it benefited her alone, not just them. She wasn't supposed to be swayed by them, wasn't supposed to play and joke with them.

She was supposed to be cold and detached from all the people she had to work with. She has to remain unfazed.

She was trained to be the Batman.