40

The air was stuffy, floors covered in shards and chunks. And the dust—there was so much dust. Ruva was labouring away, digging through the rubble. For hours now she'd been pulling away at plasterboards and steel, searching for survivors.

She had no idea when she'd find another person—if she'd find another person.

But there was a bigger question, a scary one. Would she find survivors or casualties?

That was the one that hurt. The one she didn't have time to answer. If she stopped and let herself think, she would burn out, and then she wouldn't be able to help anyone. Ruva gritted her teeth and kept pulling away. Her hands were covered in tender patches from the stone, paper-thin cuts running across her fingers from the metal sheets. She was tearing her hands apart.

And she wouldn't stop, not until she knew everyone was out safely.

She didn't know where Leo was, they had been separated in all the chaos at the start. She wasn't worried, Leo had checked in with her a few times, and they both still had their comTCDs.

Before Ruva could spiral any further, there was a sort of… a sort of voom that went through the hospital, making the windows shudder in their frames.

Ruva frowned, walking over to the window. the glass in it had all shattered, but she could still make out what was happening, The horizon was streaked with smoke, and from this level of the hospital, Ruva could see a new, vivid yellow patch near the water, consuming the houses.

Ruva felt her stomach drop, the flames had broken out of the north-east districts.

'Wait, what did you just say?'

Ruva didn't flinch, she was barely surprised that he heard her. 'The fires are heading towards the docks. The wind is pushing it even faster.' Ruva's voice would've broken if she was speaking aloud, the sound getting caught in her throat.

'Greg's over there.'

Ruva stopped. She recognised that tone, felt the desperation behind it. It was the voice Leo used when he was faced with a life and death choice, when he knew his answer and the pain it might bring him.

'Don't go anywhere, Leo. We have to stick together, remember?'

He didn't reply.

'Leo?'

'Yeah?' he said, his voice sounding strained.

'Please don't leave, not without me.'

The silence was tight between them, even though they were nowhere near each other. Looking at the pink ribbon between them, it was stretched as tight as she felt, like a rigid band instead of a flowing strand.

'Okay,' he finally said, the word seeming to come in a single breath.

'Can you meet me out the front of the hospital?' asked Ruva, her voice climbing ever so slightly. 'We need to think of our next move.'

'I'll meet you there.'

Ruva turned, leaving where she was, leaving the volunteers around her, digging through the rubble. She travelled down flight of stairs, stepping around people carrying stretchers and medicine, people with bags of equipment and food and others.

She tried not to look at the people who she couldn't save, the people she was leaving behind. She tried to ignore the dust on the ground, the red stains on people's clothes the desolate look in their eyes.

She tried to ignore it.

Tried.

Ruva's eyes started to blur, and she scrubbed away the tears. This was not what she needed. She didn't have time to have a breakdown. That could come later. When they were safe.

She ran, ignoring the way her lungs clogged up, her breaths becoming smaller and smaller until she was choking for air. She bent over, coughing and trying to swallow as much air as possible. She reached out, trying to find something to grab onto, but all she could find was bare ground, covered in dust and little chips of plaster—she was on the floor?

Yes, she was, collapsed on her knees, barely able to see, all the life choking out of her.

What was she… what was she doing with her life? She was wasting it, destroying herself. Ruva sobbed so hard she couldn't see, she was choking for breath, her shirt soaked with sweat and dust. Time didn't exist. She wished she didn't. She was lying on the ground, curled up into a little ball. People walked past, but nobody stopped for her.

Why was nobody stopping?

Her hands curled into fists. Not because she was angry at them, but because she was angry at herself. They didn't have time for a mess like her, they were busy actually helping people.

She squeezed her hands harder. Harder. Her hands were white and her palms crying in pain, she knew she'd drawn blood. The pain made it clearer.

'Where are you, Ruva?'

Ruva stopped, Leo's message like a dart in her head, clearing away some of the fog surrounding her.

She had to help him. He had been waiting for her, waiting for her to arrive while she was feeling sorry for herself in a hallway. She was delaying him.

'O-Okay. I'm coming now. I got… delayed.'

Only one thing remained in Ruva, a single desire, the thing she needed to do most in the world.

She needed to help Leo.

Ruva was pounding down the stairs, weaving around people and rubble without thought. She wasn't looking at them, at their pain and trials and doubt, her eyes glided straight over them. She barely saw them.

She weaved her way around the people, their faces scrunched in worry whilst hers was as still as stone. She was beyond empathy, the only thing keeping her tethered was her need to help Leo.

Weave through the people, go through the door. The hallways were wider now, she was getting closer to the entrance. Down an angled hallway, the rooms long since evacuated.

One final corner, and she was in the lobby.

Leo was standing just outside the doors, his face smeared with sweat and dust, the crinkle in his brow that was nearly always present.

He was about to say something, she could tell, but Ruva didn't let him start. "We need to go now."

Her voice sounded like steel, something she didn't expect when there wasn't an ounce of strength left in her. She was a shell. Not a pretty one that you'd find on a beach, like a skeleton, a sad reminder that once she had lived, but was now gone.

She had been gone for a long time, just pretending she was still living.

'Okay,' said Leo, sounding a little cautious. 'I'll just text mum first, to tell her where we're going.'

Ruva stood on the spot, waiting as Leo typed away the message. She felt like she was being squashed, that something was coming. She had to keep going.

Not a second after Leo sent the message, Ruva said, "Let's go."

Leo nodded, and they jogged over to the buildings opposite. Leo led her into a small alley, and then started scaling the drainpipe on the wall. Ruva followed after him a moment later, grateful for how her hands stung. They had been grinded by the rubble and punctured by her fingernails, but the stinging reminded her that she was still alive, still moving, still capable of helping.

Once they were on the roof, Ruva didn't hesitate. "Let's go."

Leo looked like he wanted to say something, but he didn't.

They both started running, jumping from roof to roof, making their way down to the docks.

Ruva knew she was running out of breath, and Leo was almost gasping. They were close, now, whenever the wind changed she could smell the smoke on the air, and hidden underneath it the scent of the sea.

As Leo jumped to the next roof, he held a hand out to Ruva, telling her to pause.

She stopped, lifting her arms above her head to get her breath back. Looking into his eyes, Ruva knew he had a question, one she couldn't answer. One she didn't want to answer.

He didn't say anything—something that surprised Ruva—but his brows narrowed in the slightest frown.

Before he could question her, Ruva said, still panting "We need to keep going, we don't know how much time we'll have before we reach the docks."

But in that moment, Ruva was hit but the absolute absurdity of their plan. They had no idea where Greg could be. Yet here they were, throwing themselves into the fire again. Throwing themselves into danger, just for the slim chance, the unlikely moment they would find him.

But she didn't say anything to Leo.

Leo didn't say anything either.

She was afraid. Too afraid of admitting her failure.

So they kept running.

As she was gasping for oxygen, Ruva came up with a new plan. They were going to make sure everyone was evacuated. They were going to make sure everyone was safe. They were going to find Greg.

Ruva ignored everything screaming at her to go away from the smoke, not into it. She ignored it. She ignored every ounce of logic in her brain.

She wasn't here to survive. She was here to help. Even if it cost her life.

The smoke got thicker. Soon she couldn't see from one end of the street to the other. Then she couldn't see the roofs around her. The air grew warmer. Too warm for spring.

Then she couldn't see the ground.

Leo grabbed at her shoulder, pulling her to a stop.

"What?" she said, her voice like a whip.

Leo said nothing. He was covered in sweat, with an almost… almost betrayed look on his face.

Ruva stopped. The hollowness inside her growing. He… he hated her, didn't he?

She took in a deep breath, everything in her turning to steel.

If Leo hated her, then so be it.

She turned around, sprinting into the smoke and shadows.

She jumped from roof to roof, having little warning before she was at the next one, slipping on the ash that dusted them, inhaling so much her stomach hurt. Every breath ripped through her lungs.

Leo's pounding footsteps followed her, and the smoky air hiding every glimpse of the sun. The sky wasn't just black, she could see the orange poking through it, the flames lighting up the world in sickly shades of orange and red. Embers floated through the sky, and she could hear the flames. It wasn't the soft crackle of a fireplace, it was the sound of all-consuming flame. Flames that roared up, consuming everything littered in their path.

Flames that spared no one.

Ruva wasn't going to stop, she wasn't going to avoid the flames, she wasn't going to—she slipped, landing on the roof and starting to roll. Panicking, she put her hands out to stop herself, but only grinded the skin on her hands. She gritted her teeth as she felt the skin shred, trying desperately to stop her fall.

It was no use, she was just sliding. Sliding all the way down. Her eyes widened, watching the edge grow closer and closer. And then—weightless, there was nothing below her.

Despite her terror, she didn't make a sound, not even as she thumped on the floor, pain flooding her body.

Everything—everything—hurt.

She winced, clenching her jaw shut against the waves of pain. The pain wouldn't last, she knew, soon her adrenaline would wash it away, leaving nothing but the bruises yet to form. She held her breath, blinking her eyes not just from the pain, but from the smoke surrounding her.

Ruva had landed on her side, so it was mainly her wrist and her leg that were aching. She pulled herself up on her right leg, reaching for the building beside her. As soon as she tried to put weight on her left leg, pain bolted through it. Ruva gave an inward sigh as she clenched her jaw. Her ankle was most likely broken, and now she couldn't move.

Leo might hate her, but she couldn't bear the thought of Leo running through the smoke looking for her, wasting more of his time. 'Leo? I've fallen down.'

Even her mental voice sounded empty, every piece of empathy with herself was gone, as insignificant as the dust in the air.

'Where? What happened? You were blocking me and then you just disappeared. Where are you?'

Ruva mentally backed away from the questions, her ribbons coming into view.

She could hardly see in the smoke, but her ribbons flowed through it clearly, giving her a general idea of where she was in the street. She still felt blind, though, because while she could see where everything else was, she had no idea where she was.

Ruva reached towards her pink ribbon, the one connecting her to Leo, and—whoa, the end of her ribbons were turbulent, a sickening green, a greyish cyan, a saturated brown.

'Ruva? Are you okay?'

Ruva stared at her hands, at the ribbons flying around her like a hurricane. 'No,' she said, staring at the chaotic storm that was her. 'I'm not.'

She hadn't been okay for ages. Just an absolute mess pretending to be a human being.

'Where are you? I can barely see in this smoke.'

Ruva looked around, but there was nothing. She had no bearings, she didn't even know which way north and south was. 'I don't know. I fell off a roof and I just…' She stopped, thinking of what Leo must be seeing right now.

He would be on a roof. Looking around but barely able to see into the smoke.

'I think you should get off the roof. There's so much smoke here. You might get smoke inhalation.'

'But what about you? Where are you?'

'Sorry. I really don't know.' Ruva stared at her ribbons, leading off into every direction. Their sickly colours had faded somewhat, the extra colour seeming to leach back inside her, giving her vague feelings of fear, regret and general disappointment in herself.

Wait, the ribbon lead straight to Leo, she could find him by following it.

'I've got an idea,' she said, then explained how she could use the ribbon.

'Okay, I'll climb down when I find a good spot for it, you come towards me.'

Ruva agreed, and started to move forward, only for her left leg to flame up. She gritted her teeth, tears burning down her face. Ruva took in a deep breath. Then another. Then another.

I'm fine, thought Ruva. I'll get through this. I'm fine.

This time, she tried hopping, and even though each jolt brought more pain through her, she kept going. She kept going. She wouldn't stop. She was gasping by the time she reached the end of the street, her entire leg throbbing in time with her heart.

'Leo, can you try coming toward me? It's just—my leg really, really hurts.'

'But I won't know if I'm going the wrong way,' said Leo, and Ruva could vividly imagine him rubbing at his neck.

'I can guide you,' said Ruva, 'I can tell you if you're getting closer or further from me.'

And so they both started walking, going around buildings, trying to get closer and closer to each other.

Ruva was staring at her ribbons, her eyes constantly following the ribbon. Her feelings of regret and disappointment faded for the moment, and she put all her concentration into the task around her.

'No, you're going further away, now… Yeah, that's the way.'

A crash sounded, and all of a sudden Ruva could hear Meyarins. They were sprinting through the streets, she could hear their lashing swords and fierce cries. They could be anywhere.

Oh. Oh. She was so dead.

'Let's try… let's try moving a little faster,' said Leo, his voice shaking.

'Yeah,' said Ruva, picking up the pace even though it hurt. Adrenaline seemed to be dulling the pain, but Ruva knew that would only last while she was still moving, still escaping.

'I think… I think we're getting close. Not much further.'

She couldn't be sure, but it sounded like the Meyarins were getting closer, too. Her leg was numb now, which was much better, now she could—

'RUV—' Leo's voice cut through her head, and then there was silence.

Ruva's heart pounded, shivers running down her spine. 'Leo? What's wrong?'

She quickened her pace, ignoring the spike of pain in every step.

There was no answer. Leo just—he wasn't answering.

'Leo?'

No response.

Ruva's heart throbbed in her chest. 'LEO!'

She was running, running through the smoke and shadows, ignoring the screams echoing around her. She didn't feel pain, didn't feel her injuries fighting against her, only pure panic.

She was sprinting. She was surrounded by screams, by death by… Meyarins. She was in the thick of the battle but she barely even noticed. Didn't notice the people dying alongside her, the Meyarins destroying her home.

And then she found him. So fast she nearly tripped over him, but she skidded to her knees.

He was unconscious, his lip bleeding and clothes covered in smoke. She probably looked the same.

"No," she whispered, panting to catch her breath. Her eyes were blurred from tears whether it be smoke or pain. She reached into her pocket, grabbing out the bubbler vial. She smashed it to the ground, the rainbow mass rising up from smoke.

She wasn't going to abandon Leo here, not after he followed after her, let her guide him into the smoke and death. She hauled Leo up, staggering through the bubbledoor. Blinking in hesitation, she put all her focus into imagining the Wendyl's rooftop, the safest place she could think of.

She stumbled out the other end, falling to her knees on the roof. She gasped in the fresh air, so much clearer than before. Leo was a dead weight in her arms, still warm from flames that had grown close to them.

He's fine, Ruva assured herself. I just need to get him downstairs, to Tia.

She rose on unsteady legs, struggling as she grasped Leo and tried to lift him, then decided that dragging would have to do.

Leo needed to be okay. He would be.

He had to be.

As Ruva reached the edge of the roof, her face fell. She was never going to get Leo down. not when the fall seemed scary even just for her. She was too weak, so much energy drained from her mistake.

Ruva choked, tears threatening to take over her throat.

No, she thought I need to get down, otherwise nobody will know if were safe.

"Sorry," whispered Ruva, squeezing Leo's hand, "I have to leave so I can get help."

She gave his hand one final squeeze, her hand shaking at how it was sticky with sweat.

Then she forced herself to turn away, beginning the arduous job of climbing down. Her muscles were shaking, but she was barely aware of what was happening. She was viewing everything through a foggy storm, her mind awhirl with distress.

She dropped to the ground, trying not to fall over on her unsteady feet. Ruva reached for the door handle, not enough energy to be relieved when it opened. There was no room for gratitude left in her. She stumbled forward, trying to get down the stairs, ignoring the people rushing around her, and they ignored her.

She grabbed onto the stair rail, squeezing her eyes shut as the room spun. Ruva didn't know how long she stood there for, but eventually a hand landed on her shoulder.

"Ruva?" It was Mrs Wendyl, concern glinting in her eyes. "When did you get here? And where's Leo?"

Ruva stared into Mrs Wendyl's face, noticing the the dark rings around her eyes, the smudge of dirt across her left cheek. She could see the individual pores lining her nose and cheeks, her lips pale from being pressed in a solid line.

"He's on the roof," she finally whispered. "Something happened and I brought him back, but he…" Her voice cut off, she couldn't get a single word out, but she continued staring at Mrs Wendyl.

"Let's go, come on, there's no time to waste," said Mrs Wendyl. "Maria! Nick! I need your help!"

She then guided Ruva to the Rumpus Room whilst instructing the others. "You wait right here, Ruva, Tia can come and have a look at you, get you all fixed up, okay?"

Ruva sat on the bed and… froze. She was fully aware of every item in the room, everything that was moving. It seemed to be in slow motion, the world distorting. Everything was happening, but she wasn't. She just was, sitting on the couch, people blurring around her.

Faces were strange and alien. She recognised them, but at the same time they felt unfamiliar, as if she'd never met the people who were giving her medicines, asking if she was okay, asking about what happened to Leo. Their voices were far away, their questions drifting past her, without her catching their meaning. She was safe here, in this unfamiliar world—and tired, she was so tired.

Then the people stopped asking questions, and there were no medicines left to drink. Ruva closed her eyes, sinking away from the foreign world.

Ruva awoke with a gasp, her heat mingling with the icy air.

It was the dark hours, and the lights in the Rumpus Room had been dimmed, and the only person awake seemed to be Tia, walking around and checking each patient.

As soon as she realised Ruva was awake, she walked over, resting a hand on Ruva's shoulder. "It's two-am," she whispered, "You've been asleep for about six or seven hours."

Ruva stretched, but stopped when she realised when she felt her ankle being constricted, held in place, by a hard, solid material.

She pulled the blankets off herself, staring down at her ankle—her ankle that was in a cast.

"I was going to get to that," said Tia. "You shattered the bones in your left ankle—you snapped it at some point, and then kept moving on it. The stress has fractured it more, and I've run out of Skeletal Regenovator, and we're running low on the normal stuff. There wasn't enough to treat it properly, so I had to put it in a cast and let your body do the work.

Ruva stared at her leg, the cast feeling more like a cage. "But… how will I move around with it? How will I help?"

Tia's eyes dulled. "You need to rest, not help. Mum wouldn't let you out anyway, not after you went straight towards the fire and… and…"

Tia wrapped her arms around herself, blowing on her thumb and fingers. "And Leo still hasn't woken up yet."

Ruva froze, her heart pounding. She opened her mouth, but couldn't get any words out.

Tia sighed. "It was Grimm Helkin. Leos in a coma the same as all the others, and after treating his bruises and smoke inhalation, we put him in the Silent Room."

Ruva's mouth opened, then closed, then opened again. Tears blurred in her eyes. Leo was... he was stuck. Trapped in a coma with everyone else, the coma that nobody had ever broken from.

Tears leaked down her face, causing Tia to sigh. "Why are you upset? You're the one who took him into the midst of all that fighting and damage. You should have been prepared for something like this to happen."

Ruva gasped for air, the tears flowing down her face.

She wanted to say that she didn't mean for it to happen, that Leo wasn't meant to get separated from her, she was trying to get back to him.

But Tia was right. The only reason they were there was because Ruva had led them. Because she was running away. And when she fell, she didn't tell Leo right away, she barely wanted to see Leo.

So she swallowed her protests, smothering them inside.

And a little bit of hope died, too.

I know it's depressing. I know it's late. That's my fault.

I lowkey hate this story now, but I promise the ending is better. I think that 41 will be the last chapter, but this story was originally going to be only ten chapters, so…

Anyway, if you read this story, please leave a review. Even just write, "I read it, and I want to read the next chapter"

I will accept anything.

I'm gonna write the next chapter, and hopefully post it within the next century.