I remembered the day Adam and Eve fell like it was yesterday. It was one of Hell's best days, one of mine personally, as everyone saw my true capacity for evil (and I got a promotion). I felt bad for the two humans, I really did, but I was only there in the garden for one purpose: to bring sin into their lives. The idea was a pretty bleak one, one I preferred not to think of too much; it would help being able to live on Earth and out of Hell, but it still wasn't ideal.
I hadn't been in the garden the whole time, since its creation, there had been shifts; likewise, there were shifts with the angels. On that particular day, there was a pretty young thing representing Heaven. After Adam and Eve had left, I decided to go talk to her, maybe I could piss her off and do more demonic things for Hell. Or maybe just talk to her, remember what it was like before I fell. I slithered up the wall to where she was standing until I was right next to her, and then I took my more human form.
She hadn't noticed me slithering, but when I started to grow, she turned her head at me and shifted back a bit, probably surprised the enemy wanted anything to do with the likes of her. Being the cool demon I was, I continued to look straight ahead, although I was curious to get a better look at the girl.
Soon I was at my full height, a bit taller than her, and had my large, black wings spread out. My black clothes stood in stark contrast to her saintly white, as well as our hair; mine was long and red and curly, at the moment; I couldn't get a good look at hers yet, but I believe it was blonde, and straighter.
Deciding to gain the upper hand in the conversation, I stated bluntly, "Well that went down like a lead balloon." Deliberately poking at her failure. Some angels would have shouted angrily at that, or done so without me having said anything in the first place, but not this one. She chuckled awkwardly, looking back and forth between our wayward travelers and me, not quite knowing how to react; she'd probably never been exposed to a demon in this fashion.
"Sorry, what was that?" She asked, smiling and grimacing at the same time (maybe I'd misjudged her, maybe she was about to lose it), while deciding to look at me. I took the opportunity to look back.
I know this is a bit of a cliché, but my god she was beautiful. She had smooth, clear skin that was pale in reality, but appeared a more bronzed color in the sunlight; she had a small, cute nose, and soft, full, pink-colored lips. Her hair was gorgeous, it was curlier than I had originally thought, not like mine, but more wavy, curled outward, and it was a radiant blonde color the way the sun hit it, halfway between gold and platinum. The real beauty was her eyes though. They were blue, that was the first thing I thought, a bright, celestial blue, however upon closer examination, I thought I saw hints of green strewn about, along with some dark blue, or possibly violet, along the edges. I knew beauty, in that sense, was such a human concept, but I would be lying if I said she didn't take my breath away.
Still not sure what her reaction to me was, I continued with my earlier antics, repeating, "I said, 'Well that went down like a lead balloon.'" Frowning almost apologetically at the end, and putting the ball in her court. Catching on, the girl agreed, "Yes, yes, it did, rather." Which discredited my previous theory that she had been about to go off on me; instead, she was rather, well, friendly, it would seem, conversational.
"Bit of an overreaction if you ask me." I pressed further, just making sure this wasn't one of the crazy angels. She had resumed watching Adam and Eve as I turned to look at her again, however upon hearing my words, she looked a bit nervous and began looking back at me again, probably because I had insinuated that her precious God had done something wrong.
"First offense and everything." I continued. Deciding to actually lay my true thoughts on the matter before the girl, I added, "I can't see what's so bad about knowing the difference between good and evil anyway." This confused the angel, as she looked back out in front, struggling to come up with an appropriate response, worthy of someone of her position.
After grappling for a bit with what to say, she finally decided on, "Well it must be bad..." She trailed off. I thought she had lost her point, but I realized she was waiting for me to give my name. "Crawley." I supplied.
"Crawley." She repeated. I liked the way she said my name. She didn't sneer at me like many other angels, and demons, she didn't laugh at it, she said it seriously, like we were equals, or friends, or something of the sort.
"Otherwise..." She continued her argument, or tried to, "you wouldn't have tempted them into it." I practically had to roll my eyes at another deluded angel, who had probably never had an original philosophical thought, but accepted everything Heaven told her.
"Oh, they just said, 'Get up there and make some trouble.'" I explained to her, hoping to show the angel that things weren't so black and white; but, she had been trained well, and responded with, "Well obviously, you're a demon." There was a slight pause. "It's what you do." I think there was a hint of disgust and revulsion in her face, but she looked away again before I could tell for sure; I let it go.
"Not very subtle of the Almighty though. Fruit tree in the middle of a garden with a 'don't touch' sign. I mean, why not put it on the top of a high mountain? Or on the moon?" I turned to look at the angel, seeing her looking off into the distance, and knew I had confused her, I had rattled her strong, faithful beliefs, so she kept silent.
"Makes you wonder what God's really planning." I finished, unintentionally making it sound like I was trying to lure the girl to the bad side (I wasn't, I was only attempting to have a philosophical conversation).
Deciding that that had been too much philosophy and questioning of God, the angel tried to shut me down, saying "Best not to speculate." In a frustrated tone. "It's all part of the Great Plan. It's not for us to understand." There was a small pause. "It's ineffable." She finished proudly.
I knew all of this; I had been an angel once myself. However, I wanted to see just how far I could push this girl, so I asked, "The Great Plan's ineffable?" Knowing the response. "Exactly." The angel said smugly. "It is beyond understanding and incapable of being put into words."
Growing bored of the subject, seeing that I was probably going nowhere with the girl, I noticed something interesting that I intended to inquire about: the angel's sword was missing. I had seen God Herself give the flaming sword to the girl, and when God gave you something, you simply did not lose it, so where was it?
"Didn't you have a flaming sword?" I asked, looking down and around her, thinking it might magically appear as we were talking about it, but no such thing occurred. The angel visibly tensed up and was at a loss for words, and I knew something was off.
"Uh," She lamely stuttered out, which I cut off and confirmed my previous statement, saying, "You did. It was flaming like anything. What happened to it?" Maybe she had set it down somewhere along the wall, or in the garden, a good angel like her wouldn't lose the sword.
"Uh..." The angel was still stuck on scrambling for words, shaking her head nervously. She looked away from me, in shame it would seem. "Lost it already, have you?" I asked, poking fun at her, expecting a quick reply as soon as she remembered that would put all my rumors and speculation to rest. That was not the case.
She looked down, mortified, it would seem, and muttered, "Gave it away." I was positive I had heard wrong, so I asked, "You what?" In shock.
"I gave it away!" She said, looking back at me again, and appeared extremely embarrassed. I almost laughed at that, I was smiling so wide, it was just ridiculous that such a devout follower of god, such a pious angel would do something so obviously wrong, something that so evidently contradicted the wishes of God, so I listened with fascination as the girl explained herself.
"There are vicious animals. It's going to be cold out there. And she's expecting already! And I said 'Here you go. Flaming sword. Don't thank me. And don't let the sun go down on you out here.' I hope I didn't do the wrong thing." I was taken quite aback with the angel's confession; I had believed that there wasn't a questioning bone in her body that would dare go against God of Heaven, in any way, shape, or form, and yet she had risked quite a lot to give Adam and Eve the sword, to protect themselves, because she followed her morals, thinking it was the right thing to do; I was actually kind of touched, despite being a demon and all.
"Oh, you're an angel, I don't think you can do the wrong thing." I reassured the girl, who was very relieved to hear someone say that, even if it was a demon. "Oh, oh, thank-oh, thank you." She responded gratefully. "It's been bothering me."
A lion roared in the distance. I looked out and saw one attacking Adam and Eve, and sure enough, there was the flaming sword with them, in the flesh. "I've been worrying too." I added to the angel. "What if I did the right thing with the whole 'eat the apple business?' A demon can get in a lot of trouble for doing the right thing." I said, watching the girl closely, curious for her reply, although she didn't give one, as she watched the fight in morbid fascination.
"It'd be funny if we both did the wrong thing, eh?" I asked, joking. "If I did the good thing and you did the bad one." I started to laugh, so the angel did too, until the words sank in and she stopped.
"No! It wouldn't be funny at all!" I could see her mind going through all of the horrible things that could happen from the little scenario I had presented, and I almost had to laugh it was so cute. "Well..." I trailed off, opposing the angels viewpoint. All of the sudden, water began to fall from the skies; lightly, at first, but it got gradually heavier. The angel and I both looked at each other, confused as to what exactly was happening.
Involuntarily, I stepped closer to the angel as the sky got dark and the rain began to pour, and similarly, she extended one of her wings over my head, to shield me from the water, without even thinking. The rain eventually stopped, and we parted ways after that, going to Heaven and Hell respectively.
a/n: yay first chapter! so yes, basically I just went through all of the show's dialogue and added a mindset behind it, this is how the rest of the chapters will be as well
