I've been trying to update this story more often, but sometimes it can be a little difficult trying to balance writing Solstice and this story at the same time, so I apologize if I keep you waiting during any particular update.
I continued hunting like this for a couple of days, willing myself to resist the urges primarily because the unpleasant visions of my possible lonely futures constantly reminded me of why I couldn't indulge myself. Unfortunately, my strategy wasn't foolproof.
On the second day of my hunting experiment, a human scent was so close that my legs moved towards it at their own will, and I had drained the innocent woman before I realized what I was doing.
Any human scent almost suffocated me, and even if I was able to resist them, I still gasped and choked at the smell until I was able to run far enough to lose it. I struggled with my own nature for a long while, solely relying on my willpower to resist my natural instincts. Animals still quenched my thirst, but it was always a replacement for my true cravings.
The more I trained myself, though, the easier it was. It was nearly impossible every time, but I eventually got used to the invisible hands gripping my throat at the scent of blood. They were unwelcome, but they were frequent.
I spent most of my days hunting - the more I drank, the less tempted I was - but if I wasn't chasing down prey, I was concentrating. My premonitions changed drastically every day, flickering in and out of my vision constantly. Over time, I gained more control over them. If I focused, I could control the subject of my visions, for short amounts of time. They were usually very overwhelming, but as I learned how the images worked, I grew accustomed to the constant flash of scenarios interrupting my view.
I wasn't ashamed to admit that most of my concentration was aimed at Jasper. His dazzling eyes and breathtaking smile always stopped me in my tracks - he was beautiful. And from the lovely scenes of him and I holding hands or kissing or gazing into each other's eyes, his looks weren't the only amazing thing about him. Visions of Jasper were very clear, so either I was just focusing on them too much or him and I were simply meant to be. Either way, I was happy.
The one thing that was never clear to me was when Jasper and I would meet. I would sometimes get random flashes of Jasper, alone and afraid, surrounded by enemies. They were never detailed enough for me to get any information out of them, but those images were scary enough to tell me that Jasper was going to have a rough life, or was having one now. It made me feel sorry for him - I already knew that he was a truly good person - but I never saw any outcome of him dead. I rarely saw any vampires dead in my premonitions, and the few that I did have were so blurred that I didn't worry about them. It must have been very hard to kill a vampire.
One day, when the snow was starting to melt and the days were longer, I saw a flash of unfamiliar color through the trees. I was in pursuit of a very promising elk, but the strange sight instantly made me tense. I let the animal run away - I had eaten a couple of rabbits that morning. I backtracked slightly and searched for the colors again, until my eyes focused on it.
"Welcome to Biloxi, Mississippi! Population: 42,175" The wooden sign read.
A smile spread across my face. As I read the sign, a vision changed and I suddenly saw an image of Jasper and I meeting. It was just a week away.
I ran towards the sign, but halted my run when the delicious smell of human blood filled my nose. The hands squeezed. Biloxi was a town, and towns had people. Lots of people. I took a deep breath and turned back, not faltering my pace until the scent faded.
What was I supposed to do now? I couldn't go into that town without the temptations. I searched through my visions, trying to find Jasper and I's reunion again. We were in a diner full of people, somewhere far from here. Philadelphia. How was I supposed to control myself in a packed restaurant? It was certainly impossible.
Then, another image changed. It was me, on my way to Philadelphia. I was standing over a body. A human body.
Don, don, doooon! We have one of our first conflicts of the story. Alice must decide what to do in order to finally meet the future love of her life. If you haven't already, feel free to check out my other story, Solstice. It's a longer fanfic about Edward's perspective during New Moon. I've received even more feedback, so thank you guys so much for all of the support. Your reviews truly make my day!
